Previously on
Cary and Sherry wanna sleep with us.
Opening our marriage, this loophole cannot be falling into my lap.
You've been fucking buried in here. Obsessed.
Just move on, okay? She's dead!
Get the fuck out now!
Just remember. Look at your partner.
But I don't want Love. I don't want any of this.
All I want is you.
-I killed Natalie for you! -Shut up!
Go.
Swinging was supposed to be my marriage's dying gasp, not theirs.
How the fuck are these two getting out of here alive?
You wanna give me a report?
I'm good, I'm good. Thanks, babe.
Okay, baby. Um...
I'm gonna have to move us to a purple flag.
You're holding back.
Recognized.
I was in pain 'cause you got some tape on my wound.
I didn't want it to sound like I was blaming you.
Oh, my God. Baby, I appreciate your concern for my feelings.
I'm moving us back to a green flag.
Stay in purple flag for a sec.
Yeah?
Try that bandage again because it hurts like a motherfucker.
Yes, yeah, just brace yourself.
Breathe, sweetie. Take a deep breath in.
I have some fucking weirdos in the basement.
Yet, in their own weirdo way,
the Conrads bring out the best in each other.
Now, Love and me, we bring out something in each other.
That's why I need to get out.
In Love's mind, we're finally on the same page
and can face adversity as a united front, which means Love's taken it upon herself
to figure out how to, quote, "get rid of the Conrads."
And I am tasked with restoring our home to a state of Rockwell perfection.
Rockwell by way of Bettie Page, anyway.
All while trying to keep my son's attention on his cartoon.
Don't worry.
After today, we're never doing this again.
Unread still. Where are you, Marienne?
I need you to remind me there's life beyond this.
What's wrong?
You throw your pacifier? Where is it?
R.I.P. pacifier.
And I have to figure out how to trash Sherry and Cary's smorgasbord of sex toys.
Make it like this disaster of a night never happened.
This stuff I should keep.
Could prove useful.
Unlike their lifetime supply of double-headed dildos,
those I've seen enough of.
What the actual fuck?
So last night could have gone worse?
Fuck, this is a Chekhov situation now, isn't it?
If I touch it, I all but guarantee it gets fired.
Does that apply in real life?
There's a literary trope that pops up as often as Chekhov's gun,
where you leave it and then someone else uses it against you.
Of the two...
Chekhov was a logical man, he'd agree.
At least Henry can't comprehend what's happening.
I'm trying to protect him, Marienne.
The way no one bothered to protect us.
-Check this out. -Ooh!
Nurse Fiona?
Morning.
Morning, Joseph.
Are you okay?
Go hang out with your friends.
Who pissed in her Wheaties?
That guy she's dating hurts her.
What are you gonna do about it? Gonna beat him up?
Come on, man. Didn't you learn from last time with your mom?
-Dante, what's up? -Have you seen Marienne?
I'm having trouble reaching her.
She didn't come into work?
I'm worried she got bad news about the custody hearing.
-Shit. -I hope not.
But, if so,
I might know where she went.
Tell me where. I can go.
Okay, there's this store.
When she was feeling really bad, she used to sit outside
and entertain going in.
She hasn't done it in a while.
-A liquor store? -If she's there,
she's not gonna wanna talk to you.
I should have been with you, not in Love's latest mess.
I shouldn't have left you alone.
Hey, Dante, can you watch Henry for just a little bit?
Oh, my God. Yes.
-Bring the little prince here. -Thank you. I'll be there soon.
Love thinks I'm getting rid of evidence. Ought to buy me some time.
I'm coming, Marienne. Don't do anything you'll regret.
These look amazing.
Thank you.
What's up with him?
Mm, stomach problems, stress.
But honestly, I think these will help.
Cary?
Thank you, Love.
You're both acting fucking weird.
I mean...
can you blame us?
And what about you? You--
Holding up all right?
Me?
Yeah.
I'm sure you'd rather spend every spare minute on your letter.
For Henry's school counselor?
Fuck, that was due today.
I did say I'd help. If you're comfortable with it.
It's super vital to have her on your side if you wanna get into Ashman.
I'm not gonna let you write a letter to help get my son into preschool.
No!
Love, see, you're getting it wrong already.
It's not the admission letter.
It's a letter of introduction
for the counselor who's gonna get your son into preschool.
Hey, truth?
One mother to another.
In no universe would I ever jeopardize that baby's future.
And trust me, you only get one shot at Ashman.
So Matthew has video of Joe and me?
I always thought your husband was an abusive dick but...
now, thanks to my dad, there's proof.
So this is what he's been doing? Recording people?
He's trying to figure out who killed Natalie.
Does he think it was me?
What? No. No, of course not.
I mean, I don't know. I don't know.
Who knows what he thinks? He's not on his A-game.
He's not recording people.
He's just-- He's accessing all the footage
from all the cameras everyone's already got.
-What the fuck? -Okay, okay, look.
He kicked me out.
Theo...
I'm not going back to my fucking mom's.
I just--
I'm gonna go do my own thing.
You know, go have a life, and, um...
I want you to come with me.
Run away with me, Love.
I care about you, like so--
I love you.
I can't stand it.
Just look me in the eye...
and tell me that your husband is not a violent man.
Okay.
This is what I'm gonna do.
I'm gonna go,
I'm gonna go back to my dad's and get that footage.
It's gonna be hard proof that Joe is a piece of shit.
I know that it's not admissible
and I know it would get my dad in a lot of trouble,
but I am saying threaten Joe with it.
You can use it to make a clean break.
I know.
I know, it's a lot.
I need to think.
I'm gonna take care of you.
I promise.
Okay?
He's not gonna hurt you anymore.
I'll be back.
Okay.
Fuck you, Dad.
This is so far beneath you.
I wanna erase everything that ever made you think you deserve to be here.
Um, what are you doing here?
Oh, shit. My book club meets here.
-What are you--? -Dante.
We were worried.
-What happened? -Please don't talk to me
in that tone of voice like I'm about to jump off a goddamn building.
Have you?
Sometimes I just like to sit and count the creases in the paper bag.
You're embarrassed. You don't want me to see you like this.
Did the judge rule against you?
Are you surprised?
Ryan's taking her away from me.
-You can fight it-- -They're moving to New Jersey.
He's got a new job lined up, a huge opportunity,
cable news and...
could it be any more perfect than that?
Son of a bitch.
I was so stupid to take this back to court.
-I got greedy. -You deserve everything you want.
And more.
Yeah.
You can tell Dante I'm fine.
Look.
Fine.
You can go.
I get it.
There are times I hate myself... too.
So much I can barely stand it.
I killed someone.
When I was little.
He was hurting my mom, so I shot him.
That's how I ended up in a home.
So you aren't the only person
who's haunted by shame.
Joe.
Do you think now that I deserve all the bad things that happened to me?
No, of course not.
-You were a kid. -My mom felt differently.
Yeah, well, fuck her.
She was your mom. I would never--
Exactly.
You would never.
That is the kind of mother you are.
I struggle...
every day with the fact that I'm capable of doing something like that.
I hate that I did it, but I did it.
And I have to figure out how I'm gonna live with it.
And Henry makes it worth it.
-Yes. -Mm.
-Yes, and I did not see that coming. -Mm-hm.
Yeah, neither did I.
I just want her back.
You're gonna figure that out.
That's what people like us do.
I don't need to cause any more damage.
You can't.
I'm serious. No matter how broken my marriage is,
it has nothing to do with you.
It's done.
I'm ending it.
I would do anything for you.
It's just, ask. Just ask me.
What am I supposed to do now?
What do you want?
This.
This is real.
I don't have to pretend with you.
I'm the real me. This is our beginning.
I'll find a way to fix everything, so that this is our every day.
Cary, you're off-key.
You're not gonna get the parasympathetic response.
I'm not looking to reduce heart rate.
I'm seeking a state of readiness.
What?
You're gonna break us out of here?
I'm sensing a little bit of a tone.
Well, I'm in a cage and you're planking.
Do you have a plan?
Yes, use everything that's at our disposal.
-My brute strength-- -Our relationships.
Your friendship with Love?
If you two were friends,
why didn't she tell you about the dungeon in her basement?
-Hi, Love. -Hey.
Okay, you could have asked.
Since you're in my phone,
I send my twins a check-in e-mail every day that they're at camp.
Yeah, sure. I'll send one.
Thank you so much.
So, um... why did you wanna get into my phone?
Just thought I should make sure you check in
with your adoring masses.
You're gonna be off the grid learning how to make placenta tea,
so no posts for a while.
God, you're so smart, Love.
-Even under stress and-- -Stop trying to be my friend.
We are friends.
Were, are... I'm sorry. I don't know how to talk to you
-in this situation. -Then why are you talking to me?
Because my life is at stake.
And, also, I happen to care about you and apparently that didn't go away.
Kind of always knew you had secrets.
I just thought I knew why you were so hush-hush.
Because Madre Linda is a nest full of narcissistic vipers?
I mean, yeah, of course.
'Cause narcissism is control.
Do you know how terrifying it is to not feel like you're in control?
Especially with a kid.
And... who isn't trying to control us, Love?
We're two women who are smarter than everyone else
and people can't stand that.
I mean, my influencer bullshit means I get to choose my flaws.
What gets criticized, when they even see.
It's how I protect myself and my family.
Look where that got you.
Yeah.
I guess one could argue,
I was in a cage of my own making the moment I had kids.
No, got married.
And at some point, it all feels like the game is rigged.
This was all and-- Hilariously inevitable.
Theo tried to convince me to run away with him.
You're shitting me!
He's totally in love with you, and I knew it.
I mean, it's, like, super gross but I think that's kind of hot.
-Ew. -Shh.
He also told me that Matthew
has been stealing surveillance footage, hoping to find out who killed Natalie.
He won't find anything.
You should out him.
-What? -What do you mean?
On my blog. Yeah, you should say that we found out that Matthew
has been watching us. He's a creep.
Out him.
Just my opinion.
I thought I knew what love was.
Beck was a child.
And Love? She fooled me into believing she was someone she wasn't.
The only thing I'm thankful for, she brought our son into the world
and led me to you.
It's you, Marienne.
Oh, no.
Joe, Theo got information.
Just call me back as soon as you get this.
I left her to her own devices for too long.
God knows what she-- The Conrads are probably dead.
Maybe she burned their house down, then bashed Matthew over the head.
Goddamn it, Love.
Who's that, Joe?
Joe...
Thank you.
You were right. I can't just give up on Juliette again.
I can't let her feel that her mother could ever abandon her.
So I'm leaving Madre Linda.
You're leaving?
Follow them to New Jersey, even if it means sleeping in my car,
flipping burgers, whatever it takes.
I'm going to lose you.
I don't regret this.
Good, good.
But how can I stop this from being the end for us?
Go home, Joe.
Can I at least get my clothes back?
I guess that seems fair.
This wasn't the plan, but I can't blame you.
You're trying to solve an impossible problem,
and that problem is Ryan.
Why don't you just sleep in your office? I don't care.
Travis!
What did you do?
Chekhov, you fucker. I can't, right?
That's the guy Love wants me to be.
Then again, people like us, we figure it out.
Ryan has to die.
Is that our doorbell cam?
Yeah, ripped it out. Where's Henry?
He's with Dante. I wasn't clear on when our guests are checking out.
Yeah, I've been preoccupied.
So, turns out, our friendly neighbor has been hacking
into everyone's security cameras for months.
-Shit. -Yeah.
He thinks his wife's killer is still out there.
Oh, does he?
Yeah, but thank God for Sherry Conrad who found out
and took it upon herself to blog about it a half hour ago.
It must be said, Love's good at all this.
Say more, please.
It seems like she found out what he was doing,
so she and Cary fled to some undisclosed location.
Whole town's in an uproar.
Scary good.
Which explains a whole slew of suits that just descended on the Engler house.
My best guess, it's a bunch of lawyers scrambling to cover up
all the insanely illegal shit he's been doing.
Wow.
You really have been busy.
Yeah. Well, as were you, it seems.
Shit. The other shoe drops.
The house looks amazing.
Good as new, right?
Quite the team, aren't we?
In the worst way.
Fuck.
-What--? What is this? -Anton cackling in his grave.
I found that in Cary's stuff.
-Cary? -Yeah.
That psycho brought a gun into our house?
These people are more fucked up than I thought.
Um, okay.
Perfect. We could make it look like a murder-suicide.
Worked for us before.
Listen to her. Our marriage cannot end soon enough.
Great minds...
Okay.
You want me to wipe it? I hear you.
You're not hearing me because I'm not saying that.
We need to be clear.
You're erasing everything you've gathered of your own volition and entirely alone.
And throwing the whole thing away
because, damn it, I just felt like an upgrade. Got it.
Hey, I'm sorry, I was just coming to look for my charger.
If I could just get a little more time here, please.
Show me the thing that's haunting you.
If there's more, I will do everything I can to help.
I don't trust my neighbors.
-Joe seems okay, but the wife, Love. -The Quinn, of course.
Yes, Love saw Natalie the day she disappeared, and she is off.
Okay. Okay, let's see it.
Nat arrives, then she goes in...
Then drives away. What am I missing?
She stayed in there for a while, then she comes out.
There's a second missing,
and she's wearing that coat and hat, and...
Keep going. Do you think that's not Natalie?
I know how it sounds.
Okay, it's not her. It's the Quinn who killed her,
broke her ring to destroy the bio-data, staged it at a rest stop,
dropped off her car, and killed Gil Brigham too,
of all people.
Made it look like a suicide to frame him for murder.
-I am trying-- -I know what it sounds like.
Or Natalie was a beautiful, flawed person with secrets.
Part of her wasn't who you thought she was.
I don't fucking believe that, okay? I can't fucking believe that.
I just keep thinking. If I look harder, I'm gonna see it.
Okay, you have combed through this thoroughly. Am I wrong?
You have to decide if you're gonna let this hunch destroy you,
your company, this family.
These people are coming for you. It needs to be gone.
You did the right thing.
So... I haven't seen Joe much.
Can you...?
I'll get him a new one.
Yeah.
God. You know, it doesn't seem fair.
This all. I mean, Joe's the reason we're all in this position
in the first place.
You didn't do what you did to Natalie
because the Englers were stealing your Wi-Fi.
You were trying to tell me how disconnected you felt.
Of course.
Your husband's screwing someone else while you're what,
changing diapers?
Sherry, shut the fuck up.
Where is he now?
Fuck him. Letting you fix a marriage that never stood a chance in the first place.
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
-Easy, hon! -Is that my nine?
Just sit and be quiet.
New rules. One of you takes this, shoots the other.
I let whoever lives out.
-Are you insane? -Wait, what?
Well, if your marriage is so perfect, stay together, die together.
This is the part of myself I told you I struggle against.
It took bros in the woods to teach me it's not something I need to reject.
It can be embraced for the right reasons.
-Thank you. -Thanks.
He looks like a man riding high on a string of recent victories.
Big new job, full custody of his kid.
Thanks to Cary Conrad's black-market elephant tranquilizer,
Ryan's tox report will tell the story, a guy trying to outrun the demons.
Sadly, the demons won.
I know from my recon that Ryan is the kind of nutjob
who thinks taking the stairs will add years to his life.
Well, the irony.
Wait, where's he going?
The elevator, you lazy piece of shit.
You following me, asshole? Huh?
Fuck.
You gotta be kidding me. My ex put you up to this, Library Joe?
-No, that was me. -No? All right.
-Speak up. I can't hear you. -I just want to talk.
Talk, really? Talk.
With this?
New trope: wishing you had Chekhov's gun to fire.
I think I'll call the cops.
Great. I'll tell them about the drugs in your car.
You tell that bitch, she's lucky I didn't kill you.
You got it?
Simple overdose is out,
but he was wasted, stepped too close to the edge,
even took a tragic leap.
It all works, so long as this bastard's--
Alive?
One person cuts out before Shavasana, I'm doing 20-to-life.
You don't have it in you.
That's for her.
Robbery-homicide may have to do.
Oh, my God. Help!
-Always stay through Shavasana. -Help! Somebody call 911!
What are you doing back there?
What the fuck?
Holy shit.
Hey. You've reached Love Quinn-Goldberg.
Please leave me a message and I'll get back to you soon as I can.
Love, hi, it's me. Where are you? We need to talk right now.
There's no saying this is bulletproof.
Do you really think she would have given us a gun if it wasn't?
God, will you just finish already? Oh!
Babe, I am trying.
I don't know how you're so regular without any soluble fiber.
You know what, Sher, it's like you think we're on a train.
We'll reach our stop, the door will magically open.
Right. 'Cause I'm not crawling up the walls like a moron.
Oh, yeah.
'Cause your plan, unlike my shit, is proving to be real fucking solid.
Hello?
Love?
You here?
Love?
You know,
we need to start thinking about the kids.
We really need to consider their future.
That's not just an argument for me to be the one to get out.
Wait...
Why would thinking about what's best for the kids be an argument for you?
Name Cole's geo tutor.
Monica.
Monica's math.
Who the fuck has a geo tutor, Cary? No one!
You know what?
We're not gonna fucking debate which parent gets to live!
Fuck this.
-What are you doing? -Stand back!
Man, guy told me this would go through an engine block.
You shot...
my ear.
Oh, my God.
Shit, shit. Let me--
-Just let me see. -Stay away from me.
-I know head trauma. -Stop.
Get the hell away from me, honey!
Hey!
Hey.
They're murderers, Theo!
We think they killed Gil too. They blamed it all on him.
Wait. Where's Love?
-What do you mean, "Where's Love?" -Theo, she's half of it!
Don't be an idiot!
She caught her husband cheating with your stepmom and she murdered her.
Now she's delivering a letter to a preschool counselor half an hour away.
Like she doesn't have two people locked in her basement.
She'll be back any minute.
I am not exactly in a position to lie to you right now, am I?
-Get us out of here, Theo. -No. You don't know her situation.
-Joe is the one that killed Natalie. -Joe didn't fucking kill her!
Let us out! Now! Find the key!
Let us out!
You'll never believe that he's dead.
Not just because people like Ryan never seem to die
but because he taught you that you don't deserve a second chance, but you do.
We both do.
I don't feel bad about this.
It isn't like what Love does. She is crazy, impulsive.
But real evil has to be dealt with
and you don't do that by letting it live to take good people down.
Hey, it's Fiona.
Something happened.
Hey. Wondering if I should put Henry down.
I'm not sure when Joe's coming. Let me know. No presh.
What?
Hey, Dante. Yeah, thank you so much for taking him.
Let me double-check with Joe. If I can't reach him, I'll call you in a sec.
Thank you.
Oh, fuck. You scared me.
What are you doing?
Uh, nothing, nothing.
Um...
Is that a key?
I know that it's not true.
What the Conrads said that you did.
What did the Conrads say I did?
That you killed Natalie.
I found footage from the day that she disappeared.
It was Joe.
I know what he is. You don't have to protect him anymore.
I need you to leave.
I need you to leave Madre Linda and never come back.
Come with me, then.
I can't.
It's my family.
We can never...
see each other...
ever again.
You have to promise me.
Theo, I need you to promise me.
Okay.
I promise.
Whatever you want.
Okay.
Okay, you need to go. Now.
I need you to give me the key back.
Um...
-What about...? What are you...? -No. Don't worry.
I'm gonna let them out, the second you leave.
Of course.
Okay.
I'm gonna go.
Goodbye, Love.
Theo, wait.