1 00:00:01,251 --> 00:00:04,546 ♪ I'm a fool to do your dirty work ♪ 2 00:00:04,546 --> 00:00:06,506 ♪ Oh, yeah ♪ 3 00:00:07,465 --> 00:00:11,052 ♪ I don't wanna do your dirty work ♪ 4 00:00:11,052 --> 00:00:13,013 {\an8}♪ No more ♪ 5 00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,640 {\an8}(phone chimes) 6 00:00:19,185 --> 00:00:20,395 WOMAN 1: Dear Sugar, 7 00:00:20,687 --> 00:00:22,564 I'm supposed to be getting married in a month. 8 00:00:22,897 --> 00:00:24,983 My fiancé is amazing, 9 00:00:24,983 --> 00:00:26,443 but I don't wanna go through with it. 10 00:00:26,443 --> 00:00:28,069 WOMAN 2: Dear Sugar, my wife and I 11 00:00:28,069 --> 00:00:29,237 just bought our first house, 12 00:00:29,237 --> 00:00:30,655 and I know I should be happy. 13 00:00:30,655 --> 00:00:32,198 But after she goes to work, 14 00:00:32,198 --> 00:00:34,617 I just sit in it and cry. 15 00:00:34,617 --> 00:00:35,827 WOMAN 3: Dear Sugar, 16 00:00:35,827 --> 00:00:37,871 I've been a good wife for 25 years. 17 00:00:37,871 --> 00:00:41,041 But for 25 of those years, I'd wanted to leave. 18 00:00:41,166 --> 00:00:43,293 - WOMAN 1: What do I do? - WOMAN 2: When is it okay to go? 19 00:00:43,293 --> 00:00:44,586 WOMAN 3: Do you think I should stay? 20 00:00:45,253 --> 00:00:46,254 DANNY: What are you reading? 21 00:00:46,629 --> 00:00:48,465 Uh, nothing. 22 00:01:02,812 --> 00:01:04,564 How about five stars this time? 23 00:01:04,564 --> 00:01:06,483 How about you go fuck yourself? 24 00:01:12,947 --> 00:01:13,948 Dear Sugar. 25 00:01:14,824 --> 00:01:15,992 (waterbed sloshing) 26 00:01:16,326 --> 00:01:18,036 I'm a messed-up woman. 27 00:01:19,162 --> 00:01:20,747 I've been married twice. 28 00:01:21,998 --> 00:01:23,166 I'm dishonest, 29 00:01:24,125 --> 00:01:25,126 impulsive, 30 00:01:26,377 --> 00:01:27,378 unhappy, 31 00:01:28,755 --> 00:01:29,756 jealous, 32 00:01:32,050 --> 00:01:33,051 and lonely. 33 00:01:36,179 --> 00:01:39,891 And I have no right to give advice 34 00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:41,726 to anyone. 35 00:01:41,726 --> 00:01:44,187 (water draining) 36 00:01:45,313 --> 00:01:46,564 (sighs) 37 00:01:52,654 --> 00:01:53,655 {\an8}(knock on door) 38 00:01:54,739 --> 00:01:55,740 {\an8}(door opens) 39 00:01:59,285 --> 00:02:01,079 {\an8}RAE: Um, guys? 40 00:02:04,082 --> 00:02:07,293 {\an8}- Oh, okay. Hey. - Shit. Um, (clears throat) Hey, Rae. 41 00:02:08,795 --> 00:02:09,796 RAE: Here. 42 00:02:11,339 --> 00:02:13,842 It's from Uncle Lucas. He paid you back. 43 00:02:17,595 --> 00:02:19,722 So now you guys can stop fighting. 44 00:02:19,722 --> 00:02:21,850 Or maybe you already have. 45 00:02:27,814 --> 00:02:29,315 Okay, I can't get anything else out of her, 46 00:02:29,315 --> 00:02:30,859 but something's off. 47 00:02:30,859 --> 00:02:32,443 Why the hell would Lucas trust a friend 48 00:02:32,443 --> 00:02:34,154 to drop off 15 grand? 49 00:02:34,154 --> 00:02:35,446 Have you seen my Hayes letter? 50 00:02:35,446 --> 00:02:36,990 I-- I keep it in a book, 51 00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:38,783 - and now I can't find the book. - No. 52 00:02:38,783 --> 00:02:40,160 I need it for the retreat. 53 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:41,744 And now Rae's acting all cagey. 54 00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:44,080 Wait. I found it. Ah! Good. 55 00:02:44,497 --> 00:02:46,624 Okay, I want to know who the hell was at my house last night. 56 00:02:46,624 --> 00:02:49,210 - Don't you? - Danny. Lucas paid us back. 57 00:02:49,210 --> 00:02:50,378 Rae's not screaming at me. 58 00:02:50,378 --> 00:02:52,672 We had sex for the first time in months! 59 00:02:52,672 --> 00:02:55,300 Everything is good! Things are good! 60 00:02:56,426 --> 00:02:58,511 What was up with that Uber driver last night? 61 00:03:02,056 --> 00:03:03,057 (car honking) 62 00:03:03,474 --> 00:03:05,768 Oh. That's-- That's Amy. 63 00:03:05,768 --> 00:03:08,938 So I will see you tomorrow night. 64 00:03:08,938 --> 00:03:09,939 So you're leaving? 65 00:03:10,064 --> 00:03:11,232 Right now? In the middle of this? 66 00:03:12,609 --> 00:03:13,860 In the middle of what? 67 00:03:14,861 --> 00:03:17,280 Danny, there is no "middle". There is no "this." 68 00:03:18,907 --> 00:03:21,534 Hey, everything is good. 69 00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:22,785 Okay? 70 00:03:22,785 --> 00:03:23,870 It's good. 71 00:03:25,872 --> 00:03:27,207 - Sorry. Hi. Hi. - AMY: Mama, hustle! 72 00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:29,167 What? Were you looking for that Hayes letter? 73 00:03:29,167 --> 00:03:31,961 - CLARE: Hi. - AMY: Hi. Hi. Hi. 74 00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:35,882 - Okay. So I got jerky. - CLARE: Sorry. 75 00:03:35,882 --> 00:03:38,301 - I got CBD lollies. - Whoo! 76 00:03:38,301 --> 00:03:39,969 Oh, my God, what's wrong? 77 00:03:40,470 --> 00:03:42,513 Nothing. Everything. I don't know. 78 00:03:43,056 --> 00:03:44,474 - Let's just go. - Okay. 79 00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,393 FRANKIE AND YOUNG CLARE: ♪ To forget about me ♪ 80 00:03:47,393 --> 00:03:50,396 ♪ Baby, even the losers ♪ 81 00:03:52,065 --> 00:03:54,692 ♪ Get lucky sometimes ♪ 82 00:03:54,692 --> 00:03:56,194 ♪ Oh-ho! ♪ 83 00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:59,572 I never want to see another blue book in my life! 84 00:03:59,572 --> 00:04:00,990 At least until next quarter. 85 00:04:00,990 --> 00:04:03,243 - Oh, we should celebrate. - Yes! 86 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:04,410 Let's drive to Mexico. 87 00:04:04,410 --> 00:04:05,995 Well, that's kind of far. 88 00:04:05,995 --> 00:04:07,664 YOUNG CLARE: Come on, Mom. It's spring break. 89 00:04:07,664 --> 00:04:10,416 Would you settle for Dairy Queen on Route 4? 90 00:04:13,544 --> 00:04:14,545 How about this? 91 00:04:15,129 --> 00:04:16,297 We will save up, 92 00:04:16,297 --> 00:04:18,132 and then spring break, senior year, 93 00:04:18,132 --> 00:04:19,467 we'll go somewhere great. 94 00:04:19,801 --> 00:04:20,802 Yeah! 95 00:04:21,678 --> 00:04:23,388 Yeah, okay. Uh, we've got-- 96 00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:25,181 - We've got two years to save. - Mm-hmm. 97 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:27,100 Where should we go? 98 00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:30,103 Machu Picchu is supposed to be incredible. 99 00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:31,479 - Well-- - The Inca Trail? 100 00:04:31,479 --> 00:04:34,482 I was thinking less hiking, more margaritas. 101 00:04:34,482 --> 00:04:35,525 (thudding) 102 00:04:35,525 --> 00:04:37,610 (metal clanking) 103 00:04:43,741 --> 00:04:45,285 Hey, wh-- what are you doing? 104 00:04:45,285 --> 00:04:46,369 Documenting. 105 00:04:46,786 --> 00:04:47,954 Okay. Uh, well, 106 00:04:48,538 --> 00:04:49,580 I'm Jess. 107 00:04:49,580 --> 00:04:51,666 Uh, well, you're a terrible driver, Jess. 108 00:04:51,666 --> 00:04:54,002 Huh! Uh, I wasn't-- I wasn't driving. 109 00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:55,586 Right. You were just 110 00:04:55,586 --> 00:04:57,505 - sitting there, not moving. - JESS: Well, stopped. 111 00:04:57,505 --> 00:04:58,673 I mean, who's gonna pay for this? 112 00:04:58,673 --> 00:04:59,757 JESS: You were driving. 113 00:04:59,757 --> 00:05:01,843 Honey, it was our fault. 114 00:05:03,011 --> 00:05:04,178 No, no, Mom. 115 00:05:04,178 --> 00:05:05,805 It's gonna take us both 116 00:05:05,805 --> 00:05:07,890 working doubles to cover this. 117 00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:09,976 We're never gonna make it to Mexico! 118 00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:11,394 Uh, well-- You know what? 119 00:05:11,394 --> 00:05:13,271 My father knows a guy, a mechanic. 120 00:05:13,688 --> 00:05:16,774 You wanna... give me your number? I can see if he could... 121 00:05:17,442 --> 00:05:19,235 I don't know, like, hook you up or something. 122 00:05:23,239 --> 00:05:26,409 You know, why not? Worth a shot. 123 00:05:28,578 --> 00:05:29,579 Yep. 124 00:05:33,291 --> 00:05:35,001 Unless this is just some ploy to... 125 00:05:35,626 --> 00:05:37,545 - get my number. - No. No way. 126 00:05:37,545 --> 00:05:38,755 It's the mechanic. Uh-- 127 00:05:38,755 --> 00:05:40,465 So I'm gonna get you a mechanic. 128 00:05:44,260 --> 00:05:45,553 - Cool. - Yep. 129 00:05:45,970 --> 00:05:48,848 (exhales) This writer's retreat is the best birthday present 130 00:05:48,848 --> 00:05:50,433 that anyone has ever given me. 131 00:05:50,433 --> 00:05:53,519 Aw! Well, you only have two 132 00:05:53,519 --> 00:05:55,980 sad little days left of your 40s. 133 00:05:55,980 --> 00:05:58,733 - Oh, my God. - So you gotta go big or go home. 134 00:06:00,151 --> 00:06:01,944 - That's what they say. - Oh, God. 135 00:06:01,944 --> 00:06:05,615 "Legendary British author Hayes MacKeown 136 00:06:05,615 --> 00:06:09,077 - (Amy laughs) - CLARE: "leads this penetrating workshop 137 00:06:09,619 --> 00:06:11,996 - Oh, God. -"featuring a master craftsman 138 00:06:11,996 --> 00:06:14,290 working at the height of his powers." 139 00:06:14,290 --> 00:06:16,501 Oh, "height of his powers"? Jesus! 140 00:06:16,501 --> 00:06:18,211 Like, they'd ever say that about a woman. 141 00:06:20,421 --> 00:06:21,923 Hey. So I have some news. 142 00:06:22,507 --> 00:06:24,133 - What? - Uh... 143 00:06:24,133 --> 00:06:26,219 Okay, I heard from my agents. 144 00:06:26,219 --> 00:06:27,261 Finally. 145 00:06:27,261 --> 00:06:29,180 Oh, Aim. Okay. I'm so sorry. 146 00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:32,975 And Random House is making an offer which... 147 00:06:32,975 --> 00:06:34,060 Oh, my God. 148 00:06:35,603 --> 00:06:37,855 - Wait! Oh, my God! - Right? 149 00:06:37,855 --> 00:06:39,774 - Oh, my God! - It's not even that much money but it-- 150 00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:40,942 CLARE: But, who cares. Uh, wait. 151 00:06:40,942 --> 00:06:42,110 It doesn't matter about the money. 152 00:06:42,110 --> 00:06:43,236 - It's just like-- - Yeah. 153 00:06:43,236 --> 00:06:44,612 Out of curiosity, just how-- 154 00:06:44,612 --> 00:06:45,947 I mean, I wonder how much-- 155 00:06:45,947 --> 00:06:48,741 Like, I think they said 85K. 156 00:06:48,741 --> 00:06:51,244 -$85,000? - Yeah. But, uh-- 157 00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:53,579 - Holy shit, Amy! - I know. 158 00:06:53,579 --> 00:06:55,039 - And guess what? - CLARE: What? 159 00:06:55,039 --> 00:06:57,041 I guess there's some interest in the screen rights. 160 00:06:57,041 --> 00:06:59,419 - Wow! - I know! What! 161 00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:02,755 Wow! Oh, my God. Wow. I am-- 162 00:07:02,755 --> 00:07:04,173 Whoa! 163 00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:10,763 CLARE: Oh, my God. This place! 164 00:07:11,764 --> 00:07:13,599 Not. Too. Shabby. 165 00:07:14,851 --> 00:07:16,853 Thank God they do a sliding scale, right? 166 00:07:16,853 --> 00:07:18,438 - (Clare exhales sharply) - (Amy laughing) 167 00:07:18,438 --> 00:07:20,857 - Amy? Amy! - AMY: Oh, my God. 168 00:07:20,857 --> 00:07:22,358 I just heard the news! 169 00:07:22,358 --> 00:07:26,320 (both squealing, laughing) 170 00:07:26,320 --> 00:07:28,239 - Shut up, shut up, shut up! - I know. 171 00:07:28,239 --> 00:07:30,199 - It's crazy. It's crazy. - You are a goddamn goddess. 172 00:07:30,741 --> 00:07:31,993 - AMY: Thank you so much. - I'll just-- 173 00:07:31,993 --> 00:07:34,203 I'll just sign us-- Or, you know, check us in. 174 00:07:34,203 --> 00:07:35,663 Thanks for all the support. 175 00:07:36,664 --> 00:07:38,166 I am so excited for you. 176 00:07:42,420 --> 00:07:43,337 - CLARE: Hi. - Hi. 177 00:07:43,337 --> 00:07:44,922 I'm just here to, uh, check in 178 00:07:44,922 --> 00:07:46,924 Clare Pierce and Amy Adler. 179 00:07:46,924 --> 00:07:48,050 Yes. 180 00:07:48,050 --> 00:07:49,510 You're in 181 00:07:49,510 --> 00:07:52,513 The Empty Chair: Writing About Abandonment. 182 00:07:53,222 --> 00:07:54,140 Yay! 183 00:07:54,140 --> 00:07:55,308 CLARE: Uh, no, no, no. 184 00:07:55,308 --> 00:07:57,185 We're in, uh, Hayes MacKeown, 185 00:07:57,185 --> 00:07:58,686 uh, The Story Within. 186 00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:00,813 You're definitely Abandonment. 187 00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:03,149 No, we're literally here for Hayes-- 188 00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:05,067 But you're literally in The Empty Chair. 189 00:08:05,067 --> 00:08:06,068 Yeah. Empty Chair. 190 00:08:06,068 --> 00:08:07,403 - Ueah. No, that's us. Yeah. - No, the-- 191 00:08:07,403 --> 00:08:09,322 Like I said. Let me get your welcome packets. 192 00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:10,656 Mm. Thank you. 193 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:13,367 (clears throat) Can I see this? 194 00:08:13,367 --> 00:08:15,870 - CLARE: Why are-- - So, okay, there's a, um, 195 00:08:15,870 --> 00:08:18,372 thing which is that the Hayes' workshop sold out in, 196 00:08:18,372 --> 00:08:19,749 - like, two seconds. - CLARE: No. 197 00:08:19,749 --> 00:08:21,417 So, um, there's a loophole, 198 00:08:21,417 --> 00:08:23,336 which is that we take the Abandonment workshop, 199 00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:25,171 we say we hate it, and then we switch. 200 00:08:25,171 --> 00:08:28,007 We're gonna abandon the Abandonment workshop? 201 00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:29,383 Mm-hmm. Yeah. 202 00:08:29,383 --> 00:08:30,635 PAUL: So, Clare, what'll it be? 203 00:08:30,635 --> 00:08:31,719 Sancerre or Rhône? 204 00:08:31,719 --> 00:08:34,639 Um... red. Red's-- red's fine. 205 00:08:34,639 --> 00:08:36,599 Did you hear that, Joan? We have another hot earther. 206 00:08:36,599 --> 00:08:38,768 I hope you like beef bourguignon, Clare. 207 00:08:38,768 --> 00:08:39,852 It's good. 208 00:08:43,105 --> 00:08:44,398 I-- I love your paintings. 209 00:08:46,025 --> 00:08:47,652 When we were in grad school, 210 00:08:47,652 --> 00:08:50,404 we decided we would buy one piece of art a year. 211 00:08:50,404 --> 00:08:52,240 - Art being very loosely defined. - (Joan chuckles) 212 00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:54,158 Uh, Clare's mom is something of an artist. 213 00:08:54,158 --> 00:08:55,826 - PAUL: Yeah? - CLARE: Mm. No, not-- not like this. 214 00:08:55,826 --> 00:08:57,286 Come on. Sh-- I mean, 215 00:08:57,286 --> 00:08:59,747 everything Clare has is practically handmade by her. 216 00:08:59,747 --> 00:09:01,290 I mean, she basically built your house. 217 00:09:01,499 --> 00:09:02,500 Wait. Is she an architect? 218 00:09:02,959 --> 00:09:04,085 No, she's a waitress. 219 00:09:05,253 --> 00:09:07,255 I waited tables in college. I think it's something 220 00:09:07,255 --> 00:09:09,549 everyone should do once in their life, don't you? 221 00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:11,551 She's in college too, actually. 222 00:09:12,510 --> 00:09:13,511 With me. 223 00:09:13,844 --> 00:09:15,263 - JOAN: Oh, you're kidding. - Good for her. 224 00:09:15,263 --> 00:09:17,223 That's-- It-- It's never too late, right? 225 00:09:17,515 --> 00:09:18,766 I wanted to be Ruth Ginsburg. 226 00:09:19,267 --> 00:09:21,185 Jess, what if I came to law school with you next year? 227 00:09:21,185 --> 00:09:23,062 - Would you die? - (both laughing) 228 00:09:26,983 --> 00:09:28,234 Well, actually, I was, uh... 229 00:09:28,943 --> 00:09:30,653 I was thinking-- Well, we were thinking... 230 00:09:31,571 --> 00:09:34,323 that I might, uh, defer a year 231 00:09:34,323 --> 00:09:35,700 to do some traveling abroad. 232 00:09:37,577 --> 00:09:38,661 I'm sorry? 233 00:09:38,869 --> 00:09:40,496 JESS: Clare's applying to a semester in Dublin, 234 00:09:40,496 --> 00:09:42,039 so we thought it might be fun 235 00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:45,126 if we both stayed on a bit longer, right? Yeah. 236 00:09:45,751 --> 00:09:46,752 Huh. 237 00:09:47,712 --> 00:09:48,713 I'm just gonna use the, 238 00:09:49,171 --> 00:09:50,464 - uh, bathroom. - JESS: Oh, the bathroom? 239 00:09:50,464 --> 00:09:52,008 It's-- Just go out to the left. 240 00:09:52,008 --> 00:09:53,926 Welcome, writers. 241 00:09:57,096 --> 00:09:58,389 Take a look at this chair. 242 00:09:58,389 --> 00:10:00,057 (softly) Wow, they really took this whole 243 00:10:00,057 --> 00:10:01,684 empty chair thing very literally. 244 00:10:01,684 --> 00:10:03,686 - ELEANOR: How does it make you feel? - CLARE (softly): Yeah. 245 00:10:05,980 --> 00:10:09,317 What memories does it call up in you? 246 00:10:10,693 --> 00:10:12,236 In this writing workshop, 247 00:10:12,236 --> 00:10:14,238 we'll explore abandonment 248 00:10:14,238 --> 00:10:17,658 as it relates to ourselves and our characters. 249 00:10:17,658 --> 00:10:19,201 And we'll do it safely, 250 00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:21,245 in a circle of trust. 251 00:10:21,245 --> 00:10:22,830 (softly) We're just gonna stay for one minute, 252 00:10:22,830 --> 00:10:24,832 and then we can bail and go to Hayes. 253 00:10:24,832 --> 00:10:26,250 - Okay? Yeah. - (softly) We can't do this. 254 00:10:26,250 --> 00:10:28,586 Oh, but also, he's with Random House too. 255 00:10:28,586 --> 00:10:30,963 So I wanna ask him about an editor. 256 00:10:30,963 --> 00:10:33,341 Ladies, everyone... 257 00:10:33,341 --> 00:10:34,383 Sorry. 258 00:10:34,383 --> 00:10:36,427 ELEANOR: Maybe we weren't held... 259 00:10:36,427 --> 00:10:38,137 (softly) We can't just leave after a minute. 260 00:10:38,137 --> 00:10:40,514 We have to stay a little bit longer or it would be rude. 261 00:10:40,890 --> 00:10:42,224 ELEANOR: ...maybe you weren't 262 00:10:42,224 --> 00:10:44,977 invited to that birthday party because... 263 00:10:45,978 --> 00:10:47,271 everybody knew that you always wore 264 00:10:47,271 --> 00:10:49,357 a T-shirt over your bathing suit. 265 00:10:50,441 --> 00:10:52,443 - Fuck it. Let's just go now. You ready? - No, Amy. We can't-- 266 00:10:52,443 --> 00:10:55,029 - Let's go. Come on. Let's go. - Amy, stop. We're not gonna leave now. 267 00:10:55,029 --> 00:10:57,490 Come on. I'm not staying. Come on. 268 00:10:57,490 --> 00:10:58,616 Amy! 269 00:11:01,202 --> 00:11:02,286 (door opens) 270 00:11:02,286 --> 00:11:03,621 (softly) I'm sorry. 271 00:11:03,621 --> 00:11:04,705 (door closes) 272 00:11:05,539 --> 00:11:08,542 Let's begin by closing our eyes 273 00:11:08,542 --> 00:11:10,336 and remembering a time 274 00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:13,839 we emotionally abandoned ourselves. 275 00:11:21,389 --> 00:11:23,474 {\an8}JESS: (chuckling) I should've known. 276 00:11:25,976 --> 00:11:27,103 (softly) I love this room. 277 00:11:27,895 --> 00:11:29,855 All these... books! It's-- 278 00:11:29,855 --> 00:11:31,065 Oh, you should take that one. 279 00:11:31,649 --> 00:11:32,733 Hayes MacKeown. 280 00:11:32,733 --> 00:11:34,610 Oh, my mom reads everything he writes. 281 00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:37,655 YOUNG CLARE: And this ladder. 282 00:11:37,655 --> 00:11:38,906 I've only seen them in the movies. 283 00:11:38,906 --> 00:11:40,574 I didn't know normal people had 284 00:11:40,574 --> 00:11:42,618 bookcases with ladders! 285 00:11:42,618 --> 00:11:44,036 JESS: You think my parents are normal? 286 00:11:44,036 --> 00:11:45,121 YOUNG CLARE: Yes. 287 00:11:46,622 --> 00:11:48,541 - They think you're just with some... - (Jess groans slightly) 288 00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:51,252 - backwoods... - What? 289 00:11:51,252 --> 00:11:53,254 - Why did I wear this dress? - Stop. 290 00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:54,714 You're perfect. Do you-- 291 00:11:57,133 --> 00:11:58,175 When... 292 00:11:58,592 --> 00:11:59,844 do you think we should tell them? 293 00:12:00,428 --> 00:12:01,345 Tell them what? 294 00:12:01,345 --> 00:12:02,805 JESS: That we're engaged. 295 00:12:05,933 --> 00:12:06,934 What? 296 00:12:09,687 --> 00:12:10,688 We should get married. 297 00:12:11,272 --> 00:12:12,273 No. 298 00:12:12,940 --> 00:12:14,817 Well, we've only been together, like-- 299 00:12:15,901 --> 00:12:16,777 We've only been together, 300 00:12:16,777 --> 00:12:18,696 - like, three months. - JESS: I don't-- I don't care. 301 00:12:21,282 --> 00:12:22,575 I don't. I want us to... 302 00:12:24,660 --> 00:12:27,246 I want us to spend our lives together. 303 00:12:28,414 --> 00:12:29,582 And then one day, we'll... 304 00:12:31,500 --> 00:12:32,418 we'll have our own house, 305 00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:34,128 and-- and it'll be full of... 306 00:12:35,337 --> 00:12:38,299 - art and so many books... - Books. 307 00:12:38,299 --> 00:12:40,426 ...and as many ladders as you want. 308 00:12:44,346 --> 00:12:45,556 Are you being serious? 309 00:12:48,309 --> 00:12:49,643 Uh... 310 00:12:49,643 --> 00:12:51,520 - If you say yes, yeah. - Yeah, right. 311 00:12:52,730 --> 00:12:56,150 (indistinct chatter) 312 00:12:58,903 --> 00:13:00,571 {\an8}HAYES: You kinda-- Uh, you wanna unlive that. 313 00:13:00,571 --> 00:13:01,530 {\an8}You know what I mean? 314 00:13:02,198 --> 00:13:04,492 However, it does beg the question, 315 00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:06,076 this is-- this is probably 316 00:13:06,076 --> 00:13:07,870 gonna be a plotline for the next one, 317 00:13:07,870 --> 00:13:09,038 if I ever do a next one 318 00:13:09,038 --> 00:13:10,164 'cause why the fuck would I bother? 319 00:13:10,289 --> 00:13:11,957 But having said that... 320 00:13:12,875 --> 00:13:13,876 Excuse me? 321 00:13:16,253 --> 00:13:17,630 - Oh, hi. - DES: Hi. 322 00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:19,465 I'm so sorry for-- I'm just gonna sneak in with the-- 323 00:13:19,465 --> 00:13:21,634 No. You-- You can't. It's full. 324 00:13:23,552 --> 00:13:25,513 No one's gonna know if I go in there. 325 00:13:25,513 --> 00:13:27,306 I tried my workshop, but it's just-- 326 00:13:27,306 --> 00:13:28,808 It's not a great fit for me. 327 00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:31,352 So I'm-- I think I could just slip into that. 328 00:13:31,352 --> 00:13:33,062 I can't let you join that one, 329 00:13:33,062 --> 00:13:35,397 but I-- I can get you into, uh, 330 00:13:35,397 --> 00:13:38,442 Kooks, Crazies, and Nut Jobs: Writing About Mental Illness 331 00:13:38,442 --> 00:13:39,944 with Jan Barnes-Jablonski. 332 00:13:39,944 --> 00:13:42,488 I don't think any of those words are okay to say. 333 00:13:42,488 --> 00:13:44,365 It's literally the name of the workshop. 334 00:13:44,365 --> 00:13:46,492 - AMY: Clare. Clare. - CLARE: Oh. 335 00:13:51,247 --> 00:13:52,456 AMY: Uh-huh, okay. 336 00:13:52,456 --> 00:13:54,083 - Can you hold on one second? - Amy! (scoffs) 337 00:13:54,083 --> 00:13:55,876 Oh, my God, I'm dealing with this book stuff. 338 00:13:55,876 --> 00:13:57,878 My agent wants this book to come out in-- 339 00:13:57,878 --> 00:13:59,630 Why did you just leave me? 340 00:14:01,173 --> 00:14:02,550 Are you being serious right now? 341 00:14:02,550 --> 00:14:05,553 - Yeah! - AMY: I didn't leave you, Clare. 342 00:14:05,553 --> 00:14:06,720 You stayed. 343 00:14:08,013 --> 00:14:09,014 CLARE: Ugh. 344 00:14:10,349 --> 00:14:12,977 Hi. Yeah, I'm here. That's-- 345 00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:15,896 I-- I don't know, I've never been to London before. I... 346 00:14:19,066 --> 00:14:20,067 Oh! 347 00:14:20,901 --> 00:14:22,570 This-- This is incredible. 348 00:14:22,570 --> 00:14:25,489 Yeah, well, don't expect a home library. 349 00:14:26,407 --> 00:14:27,324 Hi! 350 00:14:27,324 --> 00:14:28,951 - Hi, Mom. - JESS: Hi! 351 00:14:28,951 --> 00:14:30,536 - We meet again! - JESS: Hello. 352 00:14:30,536 --> 00:14:31,787 YOUNG CLARE: Jess didn't believe me 353 00:14:31,787 --> 00:14:32,997 when I said, "Middle of nowhere." 354 00:14:33,497 --> 00:14:34,748 - FRANKIE: Hi, honey. - I missed you. 355 00:14:34,748 --> 00:14:36,208 How was the drive? 356 00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:39,128 I hope no one rear-ended you. 357 00:14:39,128 --> 00:14:40,838 (laughing) No. No. 358 00:14:40,838 --> 00:14:41,922 FRANKIE: This time. 359 00:14:46,427 --> 00:14:47,428 Is-- 360 00:14:48,512 --> 00:14:49,805 Is this, um... 361 00:14:49,805 --> 00:14:51,140 Yeah. 362 00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:54,810 Yeah. Yeah, we-- we wanted it to be a-- a surprise. 363 00:14:54,810 --> 00:14:56,854 It's Jess' grandma's engagement ring. 364 00:14:57,688 --> 00:14:59,148 I am surprised. 365 00:15:01,191 --> 00:15:02,443 DANNY (over phone): Hey, it's Danny. 366 00:15:02,443 --> 00:15:03,777 - You know what to do. - (message beeps) 367 00:15:03,777 --> 00:15:05,321 Hey, it's me. I'm just checking in 368 00:15:05,321 --> 00:15:06,447 because I-- I just hate 369 00:15:06,447 --> 00:15:07,990 how we left things, and I just-- 370 00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:11,285 Uh, this place is so awful. And there's, uh-- 371 00:15:11,285 --> 00:15:14,705 People are so weird, and-- and everyone is vegan, 372 00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:15,915 and there's, like, no bar, 373 00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:18,292 and I just-- I'm, like-- I just wanna-- 374 00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:25,925 Uh, anyway, so I'll just see you tomorrow night. 375 00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:28,385 And, um, I'll-- Okay. All right. Bye. 376 00:15:29,386 --> 00:15:31,722 (upbeat, playful music playing) 377 00:15:44,777 --> 00:15:45,778 Ooh, my God! 378 00:15:47,237 --> 00:15:49,281 - You all right? - Yeah, it's hotter than I-- 379 00:15:49,281 --> 00:15:50,366 Ooh! 380 00:15:50,491 --> 00:15:51,825 - HAYES: You get used to it. - Yeah. 381 00:15:56,205 --> 00:15:57,206 I'm Clare. 382 00:15:58,415 --> 00:15:59,875 P-- Pierce. 383 00:15:59,875 --> 00:16:00,960 Oh, yeah? 384 00:16:01,710 --> 00:16:03,545 CLARE: You probably don't remember my name. 385 00:16:05,756 --> 00:16:09,760 Oh, look, if I-- If I did anything, uh, inappropriate, 386 00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:11,387 it was entirely my fault. 387 00:16:11,387 --> 00:16:13,639 I was a whiskey sodden wanker 388 00:16:13,764 --> 00:16:15,265 - with the manners of a fuckin'-- - Oh, my God. No! 389 00:16:15,265 --> 00:16:17,142 - No? - Yeah. No. 390 00:16:17,142 --> 00:16:18,686 Ah, that's a fucking relief. 391 00:16:18,686 --> 00:16:23,065 - So... - Actually, I sent you a letter, uh, once 392 00:16:23,065 --> 00:16:25,317 - with a sh-- a story... - HAYES: Oh, yeah? 393 00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:26,652 CLARE: ...that I'd written. 394 00:16:26,652 --> 00:16:29,905 It's called The House with the Blue Canoe. 395 00:16:30,239 --> 00:16:32,116 - Right. - CLARE: It was a long time ago. 396 00:16:32,116 --> 00:16:34,201 It was, like, 18 years ago that I wrote it. 397 00:16:34,201 --> 00:16:35,953 It was on the back of a menu. 398 00:16:35,953 --> 00:16:38,288 I was a waitress. Had a lot of doodles on it. 399 00:16:38,288 --> 00:16:39,957 - Nice. - CLARE: The menu had 400 00:16:39,957 --> 00:16:41,125 a lot of stuff on it, like, 401 00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:42,167 "Surf, Surf, and Surf." 402 00:16:42,167 --> 00:16:43,335 HAYES: (chuckling) Okay. 403 00:16:43,335 --> 00:16:44,712 'Cause it was a very irreverent chef. 404 00:16:44,712 --> 00:16:45,838 HAYES: Right. 405 00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:47,464 CLARE: Um, anyway, the-- the point is, 406 00:16:47,464 --> 00:16:49,425 is that I wrote to you about my story 407 00:16:49,425 --> 00:16:50,926 and then you answered me back. 408 00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:53,429 What did I say? 409 00:16:54,013 --> 00:16:56,098 "Dear Clare, thank you so much for 410 00:16:56,098 --> 00:16:58,350 "sharing your beautiful short story. 411 00:16:58,350 --> 00:17:00,310 "I was deep in the throes of writing, 412 00:17:00,310 --> 00:17:01,895 "but I just had to stop to tell you 413 00:17:01,895 --> 00:17:03,689 "to keep up the good work and keep going. 414 00:17:03,689 --> 00:17:07,109 There's something special there. Much love, H.M." 415 00:17:07,109 --> 00:17:08,902 (exhales) Or something like that. 416 00:17:08,902 --> 00:17:10,863 Yeah. That's nice. 417 00:17:11,697 --> 00:17:12,990 Anyway, uh... 418 00:17:15,492 --> 00:17:17,911 You told me to-- It was you that 419 00:17:18,495 --> 00:17:20,414 told me to keep going. 420 00:17:20,414 --> 00:17:22,291 - HAYES: Good. - So I did. 421 00:17:22,291 --> 00:17:23,751 - Okay, good! - CLARE: Yeah. 422 00:17:23,751 --> 00:17:25,961 Then... I didn't. 423 00:17:27,129 --> 00:17:28,172 I didn't. 424 00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:31,550 Oh, I thought that if I just, like, saw you, 425 00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:34,053 like... saw you, saw you-- 426 00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:37,681 Like, it-- it would just jar something loose in me 427 00:17:37,681 --> 00:17:39,933 or just, like, dislodge something that's, 428 00:17:39,933 --> 00:17:41,977 like, kept me from-- 429 00:17:43,645 --> 00:17:46,315 (sighs) Do you remember what you saw in me? 430 00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:50,277 I didn't read your story. 431 00:17:52,029 --> 00:17:54,615 I-- I didn't write to you, for that matter. 432 00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:56,867 You did. I have, like-- I have it right up there. 433 00:17:56,867 --> 00:17:58,994 - You definitely did. - No. No, no, no, no. No. That wasn't me. 434 00:17:58,994 --> 00:18:00,329 That would've been Morag. 435 00:18:00,329 --> 00:18:02,498 Is-- Morag is a person? 436 00:18:02,498 --> 00:18:04,541 HAYES: Morag. Yes. No, that was my first wife. 437 00:18:04,541 --> 00:18:07,586 She used to answer all my fan mail, you know? 438 00:18:07,586 --> 00:18:09,463 And, um, she was a poet. 439 00:18:09,463 --> 00:18:10,714 She definitely-- 440 00:18:10,714 --> 00:18:13,550 She would've used the word "throes." I mean, 441 00:18:13,550 --> 00:18:15,761 she had a tendency towards the dramatic, 442 00:18:15,761 --> 00:18:17,346 which was unfortunate. 443 00:18:17,346 --> 00:18:20,432 But she had really good taste in other people's work. 444 00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:24,228 And she loved fish. Shellfish. 445 00:18:25,437 --> 00:18:26,772 So... 446 00:18:26,772 --> 00:18:29,399 "Surf, Surf, and Surf" would've been right up her alley. 447 00:18:29,983 --> 00:18:32,402 (inhales) Well, okay. 448 00:18:34,696 --> 00:18:36,281 Jess, please sit. 449 00:18:36,281 --> 00:18:37,866 Oh, no, it's okay. 450 00:18:37,866 --> 00:18:39,576 I actually... 451 00:18:40,953 --> 00:18:43,497 - I need to use the, uh, outhouse. - FRANKIE: Mm-hm. 452 00:18:43,497 --> 00:18:45,249 Uh, but then I will tackle the dishes. 453 00:18:45,249 --> 00:18:46,458 So, you stay right there. 454 00:18:47,543 --> 00:18:48,460 (door closes) 455 00:18:48,460 --> 00:18:50,963 He's a really good guy, Mom. 456 00:18:50,963 --> 00:18:52,548 FRANKIE: He seems wonderful. 457 00:18:53,465 --> 00:18:55,467 And he obviously adores you. 458 00:18:55,467 --> 00:18:58,262 But you are both just so young. 459 00:18:58,262 --> 00:19:00,889 I just don't want you to make the same mistakes I did. 460 00:19:00,889 --> 00:19:02,808 CLARE: Okay, well... (scoffing) 461 00:19:05,018 --> 00:19:07,146 Jess isn't Dad, and I'm not you. 462 00:19:10,065 --> 00:19:13,819 I don't wanna live like this forever. 463 00:19:14,570 --> 00:19:16,196 There's a whole world out there 464 00:19:16,196 --> 00:19:19,908 of art and... culture 465 00:19:19,908 --> 00:19:22,327 and-- and rooms full of books. 466 00:19:22,327 --> 00:19:23,537 And I want that. 467 00:19:24,037 --> 00:19:26,748 You should have whatever you want. 468 00:19:28,333 --> 00:19:29,751 Okay. Well, I want more than this. 469 00:19:35,966 --> 00:19:36,884 (door opens) 470 00:19:36,884 --> 00:19:39,386 Whoo! Hello! 471 00:19:40,262 --> 00:19:43,348 So, there's, like, a fire-pit jamboree 472 00:19:43,348 --> 00:19:45,184 or something tonight, if you wanna-- 473 00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:46,476 What are you doing? 474 00:19:46,476 --> 00:19:47,936 I-- I think I'm gonna head out. 475 00:19:48,896 --> 00:19:49,897 (Amy sighs) 476 00:19:52,524 --> 00:19:54,026 I'm sorry if this... 477 00:19:55,611 --> 00:19:57,321 feels hard for you. 478 00:19:57,321 --> 00:19:59,990 Who said anything about anything being hard? 479 00:19:59,990 --> 00:20:02,326 Why can't you even pretend to be happy for me? 480 00:20:02,910 --> 00:20:05,579 What? Amy, I am so happy for you. 481 00:20:05,579 --> 00:20:08,749 - Okay. You're happy for me? - CLARE: I am. 482 00:20:08,749 --> 00:20:10,584 I mean, you got a book deal 20 years ago, 483 00:20:10,584 --> 00:20:13,420 and I've been busting my ass trying to catch up ever since. 484 00:20:13,420 --> 00:20:14,504 16 years ago. 485 00:20:15,589 --> 00:20:16,798 And then I had Rae. 486 00:20:17,299 --> 00:20:18,300 Okay, so... 487 00:20:19,426 --> 00:20:21,678 you-- you got the thing that you chose to do, 488 00:20:21,678 --> 00:20:23,639 but yet, you're not really that happy for me 489 00:20:23,639 --> 00:20:26,183 when I get the thing that I chose to do. 490 00:20:26,183 --> 00:20:27,893 - That's not fair. - AMY: It's not? 491 00:20:27,893 --> 00:20:31,146 I've been with you, side by side, neck and neck, 492 00:20:31,146 --> 00:20:33,065 for every single little 493 00:20:33,065 --> 00:20:35,234 and big event in your entire life. 494 00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:37,736 I've been there for your wedding to Danny, 495 00:20:37,736 --> 00:20:39,571 all the kid's birthday parties, 496 00:20:39,571 --> 00:20:42,199 the snot noses, the discolored shits. 497 00:20:42,199 --> 00:20:45,786 Your joys were my joys. Your bummers were my bummers. 498 00:20:45,786 --> 00:20:49,623 And you can't even, I don't know, be happy for me! 499 00:20:49,623 --> 00:20:51,500 Because I was happy for you 500 00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:55,254 when you got all the things that you wanted that I didn't get. 501 00:20:55,254 --> 00:20:57,798 That's different. That's not-- You didn't want those things! 502 00:20:57,798 --> 00:20:59,841 AMY: How do you know what I want? 503 00:20:59,841 --> 00:21:01,093 It's, like, you just-- 504 00:21:02,928 --> 00:21:04,304 I'm sorry, but you just act like 505 00:21:04,304 --> 00:21:06,431 you're the only fucking person in the entire world 506 00:21:06,431 --> 00:21:08,392 that didn't get your heart's desire. 507 00:21:08,767 --> 00:21:09,768 You didn't write a book. 508 00:21:10,727 --> 00:21:12,938 You didn't... write... the book. 509 00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:14,856 You didn't become the writer 510 00:21:14,856 --> 00:21:17,442 that you imagined that you were going to become. 511 00:21:17,442 --> 00:21:19,736 And it's not my fault! 512 00:21:19,736 --> 00:21:21,363 And it's not Danny's fault. 513 00:21:21,363 --> 00:21:23,907 And it's definitely not Rae's fault. 514 00:21:29,705 --> 00:21:31,873 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. That was-- 515 00:21:33,834 --> 00:21:35,002 Clare. 516 00:21:36,169 --> 00:21:37,045 (door slams shut) 517 00:21:37,045 --> 00:21:38,755 (somber music playing) 518 00:21:41,967 --> 00:21:44,303 (somber music continues) 519 00:22:09,161 --> 00:22:10,829 FRANKIE: I can take this up for you 520 00:22:10,829 --> 00:22:11,872 after the wedding. 521 00:22:11,872 --> 00:22:14,124 It'll make a lovely summer dress. 522 00:22:16,752 --> 00:22:17,753 Thanks, Mom. 523 00:22:20,172 --> 00:22:21,798 What is it, sweet pea? 524 00:22:22,215 --> 00:22:23,216 Too tight? 525 00:22:27,971 --> 00:22:29,556 Do you think I'm making a mistake? 526 00:22:32,601 --> 00:22:34,478 This is not a runaway train. 527 00:22:35,187 --> 00:22:36,980 And if you don't want to do this, 528 00:22:38,106 --> 00:22:39,983 you can step off at any time. 529 00:22:42,819 --> 00:22:44,321 - No. I love him. - Mm. 530 00:22:44,321 --> 00:22:45,405 And everyone's here. 531 00:22:47,741 --> 00:22:49,701 That is not why you get married. 532 00:22:53,705 --> 00:22:55,999 I'm sorry I acted like this wasn't good enough. 533 00:22:59,461 --> 00:23:00,462 That's okay. 534 00:23:07,844 --> 00:23:08,970 - CLARE: Hey. - AMY: Mm. 535 00:23:08,970 --> 00:23:10,013 (door closes) 536 00:23:13,016 --> 00:23:14,976 I didn't know you wanted to have kids. 537 00:23:15,977 --> 00:23:16,978 I said... 538 00:23:18,814 --> 00:23:20,649 that I wasn't having kids. 539 00:23:23,527 --> 00:23:24,528 Amy... 540 00:23:26,321 --> 00:23:27,864 I'm just-- (exhales) 541 00:23:27,864 --> 00:23:30,700 I'm just really tired of people looking at me 542 00:23:30,700 --> 00:23:33,328 like I'm some un-- unrealized woman 543 00:23:33,328 --> 00:23:36,706 because I'm-- I'm not a mother. 544 00:23:37,999 --> 00:23:39,376 And then sometimes... 545 00:23:40,460 --> 00:23:42,337 (exhales) ...I think that they're right. 546 00:23:44,881 --> 00:23:45,882 Amy. 547 00:23:48,260 --> 00:23:50,137 You are an amazing woman. 548 00:23:50,137 --> 00:23:51,805 You're fearless. 549 00:23:51,805 --> 00:23:52,848 You're gorgeous. 550 00:23:52,848 --> 00:23:54,933 You're funny as shit. 551 00:23:54,933 --> 00:23:58,520 You once worked a double with a plum up your vagina. 552 00:23:58,520 --> 00:24:00,689 (chuckles) Who else can say that? 553 00:24:00,689 --> 00:24:03,733 - Oh, my God. I hope nobody. - (Clare chuckles) 554 00:24:06,611 --> 00:24:10,031 You are the best friend that anyone could ever have. 555 00:24:11,032 --> 00:24:13,410 And you are a soon-to-be... 556 00:24:14,369 --> 00:24:16,580 bestselling novelist. 557 00:24:17,789 --> 00:24:18,790 I know that. 558 00:24:21,042 --> 00:24:22,043 Thank you. 559 00:24:27,132 --> 00:24:28,592 - Can I come here, please? - AMY: Yes, um-- 560 00:24:36,516 --> 00:24:37,517 Mm. 561 00:24:37,934 --> 00:24:39,728 Hayes didn't even write me that letter. 562 00:24:39,728 --> 00:24:41,480 What? What're you talking about? 563 00:24:41,480 --> 00:24:43,315 It turns out it was his wife. 564 00:24:43,315 --> 00:24:45,358 - One of his wives. - Oh, my God. 565 00:24:45,358 --> 00:24:47,235 - Named Morag. - Morag? 566 00:24:47,235 --> 00:24:48,528 Morag. 567 00:24:49,237 --> 00:24:51,072 And she was the one 568 00:24:51,072 --> 00:24:53,200 who answered all of his fan mail. 569 00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:54,284 Barf. 570 00:24:55,827 --> 00:24:57,037 Let me tell you something. 571 00:24:58,288 --> 00:24:59,789 I bet you 572 00:24:59,789 --> 00:25:03,460 that Hayes MacKeown would... 573 00:25:04,461 --> 00:25:07,797 kill to be turning 50 right now, 574 00:25:07,797 --> 00:25:09,633 his whole life ahead of him. 575 00:25:11,551 --> 00:25:12,511 Mm. 576 00:25:14,763 --> 00:25:16,556 (crowd chattering) 577 00:25:16,765 --> 00:25:17,766 There you go. 578 00:25:20,810 --> 00:25:23,355 CLARE: Hi. It's me again. 579 00:25:23,355 --> 00:25:24,981 Blue Canoe, right? 580 00:25:24,981 --> 00:25:26,942 I'm gonna make you actually sign my letter. 581 00:25:29,569 --> 00:25:31,530 Is this my Morag penitence? 582 00:25:31,530 --> 00:25:33,323 - Maybe. - HAYES: Look at that. 583 00:25:33,823 --> 00:25:36,159 See the handwriting runs right off the fucking page. 584 00:25:36,159 --> 00:25:37,869 - Look at that. - CLARE: Oh, I know. 585 00:25:40,205 --> 00:25:41,331 Whatever happened to her? 586 00:25:41,748 --> 00:25:43,542 - Oh, she left. - Ah, right. 587 00:25:43,667 --> 00:25:44,751 HAYES: I mean, they all fucking left. 588 00:25:44,751 --> 00:25:45,835 - Mm. - HAYES: Right? 589 00:25:45,835 --> 00:25:47,921 DES: No, no. Dear Sugar. 590 00:25:47,921 --> 00:25:50,715 It's-- It's like this online advice column. 591 00:25:50,715 --> 00:25:52,842 But she writes these raw, 592 00:25:52,842 --> 00:25:54,803 gorgeous essays that just gut you. 593 00:25:54,803 --> 00:25:56,721 ELEANOR: Oh, I don't do self-help. 594 00:25:56,721 --> 00:25:58,598 It's not even like that, okay? 595 00:25:58,598 --> 00:26:00,809 It's-- It's-- She's been through it. 596 00:26:00,809 --> 00:26:02,435 She's been through it, and she's real about it. 597 00:26:02,435 --> 00:26:04,145 - I'm telling you. She, she would-- - ELEANOR: Okay. 598 00:26:04,145 --> 00:26:05,230 HAYES: Oi! 599 00:26:05,230 --> 00:26:08,316 ELEANOR: Okay, you've convinced me... 600 00:26:08,316 --> 00:26:09,985 - You know what? - HAYES: Hmm? 601 00:26:10,902 --> 00:26:12,028 Why don't you keep it? 602 00:26:12,028 --> 00:26:13,154 - HAYES: Really? - Yeah. 603 00:26:13,154 --> 00:26:14,489 - HAYES: You sure about that? - I'm good. 604 00:26:15,740 --> 00:26:16,992 That's nice of you. 605 00:26:18,785 --> 00:26:20,203 I would like this though. 606 00:26:20,203 --> 00:26:21,830 Please. Sign. 607 00:26:21,830 --> 00:26:22,914 All right. 608 00:26:23,665 --> 00:26:25,208 Should I personalize it? 609 00:26:25,208 --> 00:26:27,168 Should I use the word "throes"? 610 00:26:28,670 --> 00:26:29,838 Uh, "Sugar." 611 00:26:29,838 --> 00:26:31,673 You can make it out to... 612 00:26:34,050 --> 00:26:35,051 "Sugar." 613 00:26:37,178 --> 00:26:38,346 All right. 614 00:26:42,392 --> 00:26:43,393 CLARE: Dear women, 615 00:26:45,353 --> 00:26:47,105 I'm writing to all of you out there 616 00:26:47,105 --> 00:26:48,648 who are in the throes 617 00:26:48,648 --> 00:26:52,027 of trying to answer these impossible questions. 618 00:26:52,777 --> 00:26:53,778 When should I go? 619 00:26:55,196 --> 00:26:56,656 When do I leave? 620 00:26:57,866 --> 00:26:59,117 And how do I stay? 621 00:27:01,369 --> 00:27:03,246 Right before my junior year of college, 622 00:27:03,246 --> 00:27:04,873 I married a good man 623 00:27:04,873 --> 00:27:07,167 whom I both loved 624 00:27:07,167 --> 00:27:09,377 and should not have married. 625 00:27:10,962 --> 00:27:13,006 Because the day I married him, 626 00:27:13,548 --> 00:27:17,052 there was a small, clear voice inside me 627 00:27:17,052 --> 00:27:18,595 - that said, "Go." - (gasping breaths) 628 00:27:19,638 --> 00:27:20,639 That said... 629 00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:22,641 "Go... 630 00:27:23,600 --> 00:27:24,809 "even though you love him. 631 00:27:25,727 --> 00:27:26,895 "Go... 632 00:27:27,729 --> 00:27:30,774 "even though he is kind and faithful and good to you. 633 00:27:31,650 --> 00:27:32,776 "Go... 634 00:27:32,776 --> 00:27:35,070 "even though there is nowhere to go. 635 00:27:35,987 --> 00:27:36,988 "Go... 636 00:27:38,031 --> 00:27:41,368 even though you don't know exactly why you can't stay." 637 00:27:42,577 --> 00:27:44,204 And once I heard that voice, 638 00:27:44,204 --> 00:27:46,081 I couldn't unhear it. 639 00:27:47,123 --> 00:27:50,001 So instead, I tried not to listen. 640 00:27:50,835 --> 00:27:54,547 (exhales sharply) But, women, you have to listen. 641 00:27:55,882 --> 00:27:58,218 There are so many reasons we should stay. 642 00:28:00,512 --> 00:28:03,973 But there is really only one reason to go. 643 00:28:03,973 --> 00:28:05,600 AMY: Should we hit the outlets on the way home? 644 00:28:06,059 --> 00:28:07,102 CLARE: Ooh. Yeah. 645 00:28:09,437 --> 00:28:10,438 Go... 646 00:28:11,231 --> 00:28:12,524 because you want to. 647 00:28:14,401 --> 00:28:15,318 Go... 648 00:28:15,527 --> 00:28:18,655 because wanting to leave is enough. 649 00:28:20,198 --> 00:28:22,784 Yours, Sugar. 650 00:28:30,458 --> 00:28:31,543 Hey. 651 00:28:32,127 --> 00:28:33,503 Hi. I'm so glad you're up. 652 00:28:34,003 --> 00:28:35,130 DANNY: Yeah. 653 00:28:35,130 --> 00:28:36,631 How-- How was it? 654 00:28:36,631 --> 00:28:39,008 Ugh. Well, it was, like, awful. 655 00:28:39,008 --> 00:28:41,928 And then, it was... actually good. 656 00:28:46,516 --> 00:28:47,934 Danny... 657 00:28:48,768 --> 00:28:49,769 I'm sorry. 658 00:28:52,147 --> 00:28:53,148 DANNY: For what? 659 00:28:55,650 --> 00:28:56,651 I've, um... 660 00:28:58,945 --> 00:29:00,113 I have been trying to... 661 00:29:01,489 --> 00:29:02,866 get out of this hole. 662 00:29:03,825 --> 00:29:04,826 Um... 663 00:29:07,954 --> 00:29:11,207 And I've been blaming you and... 664 00:29:11,916 --> 00:29:13,752 Rae too, honestly. 665 00:29:14,753 --> 00:29:17,297 Neither of you have kept me down in it. 666 00:29:17,297 --> 00:29:19,674 - Clare, I-- - CLARE: No, no, um... 667 00:29:19,674 --> 00:29:22,135 You were right. I did betray your trust. 668 00:29:22,135 --> 00:29:25,346 It has nothing to do with Lucas or the money. 669 00:29:26,973 --> 00:29:28,683 It's about our life together. 670 00:29:30,268 --> 00:29:31,269 I, uh... 671 00:29:32,645 --> 00:29:33,646 I disappeared. 672 00:29:35,690 --> 00:29:37,484 I emotionally bailed 673 00:29:38,359 --> 00:29:39,652 on so many levels 674 00:29:39,652 --> 00:29:42,614 and I just, like, haven't felt alive. 675 00:29:44,824 --> 00:29:46,534 - You know? - Yeah. Yeah. 676 00:29:47,786 --> 00:29:50,288 And so I have been working on something. 677 00:29:50,288 --> 00:29:52,791 Something I haven't told you about. 678 00:29:52,791 --> 00:29:54,083 And I think it's really good. 679 00:29:54,083 --> 00:29:56,211 And I-- I think people think it's really good. 680 00:29:56,211 --> 00:29:57,921 And I'm gonna do it. 681 00:29:57,921 --> 00:30:00,340 I'm gonna work on it. Full time. 682 00:30:00,340 --> 00:30:01,716 So don't be mad, but I-- 683 00:30:01,716 --> 00:30:04,010 I wanna quit my job, okay? 684 00:30:04,010 --> 00:30:06,012 And I-- I-- I know I just took it on, 685 00:30:06,012 --> 00:30:07,055 - Yeah. - but I think that that's 686 00:30:07,055 --> 00:30:09,015 - what has to happen. - Yeah. 687 00:30:09,224 --> 00:30:12,352 And I also spent 200 bucks at the outlets, and that's it. 688 00:30:14,979 --> 00:30:16,606 - Okay. - CLARE: Okay? 689 00:30:17,524 --> 00:30:19,651 Oh, thank you. Thank you, Danny. 690 00:30:21,820 --> 00:30:24,155 What? We're gonna figure this out. 691 00:30:24,155 --> 00:30:26,282 - I-- I am, uh-- - Just you, me, and Rae. 692 00:30:26,282 --> 00:30:28,576 - Gimme a se-- Let me talk. - Okay, well-- Okay. 693 00:30:29,077 --> 00:30:30,078 I am... 694 00:30:31,079 --> 00:30:32,831 so happy for you. I really am. 695 00:30:32,831 --> 00:30:35,333 But, um, I don't wanna do this anymore. 696 00:30:36,960 --> 00:30:40,046 - Do what? - DANNY: Uh, this. Us. 697 00:30:40,046 --> 00:30:41,881 - CLARE: You don't wanna do us? - I wanna go. 698 00:30:42,966 --> 00:30:44,217 What are you talking about? 699 00:30:44,968 --> 00:30:46,761 And I wanna go because I want to. 700 00:30:47,846 --> 00:30:48,847 And... 701 00:30:50,640 --> 00:30:52,976 And wanting to leave, it's-- it's enough. 702 00:30:53,768 --> 00:30:56,771 ♪ 703 00:31:00,066 --> 00:31:02,402 ♪ I fell in love with you ♪ 704 00:31:02,402 --> 00:31:04,988 ♪ Long before I knew ♪ 705 00:31:04,988 --> 00:31:10,034 ♪ What it meant to give everything up ♪ 706 00:31:10,034 --> 00:31:12,453 ♪ I was a rolling stone ♪ 707 00:31:12,453 --> 00:31:14,914 ♪ Rolling my way alone ♪ 708 00:31:14,914 --> 00:31:19,836 ♪ Till you came and made sense out of everything ♪ 709 00:31:20,420 --> 00:31:23,339 ♪ If it was all a mistake ♪ 710 00:31:25,675 --> 00:31:28,636 ♪ Then I guess we're both to blame ♪ 711 00:31:30,179 --> 00:31:31,890 ♪ I could've been ♪ 712 00:31:32,473 --> 00:31:34,517 ♪ So many things ♪ 713 00:31:34,517 --> 00:31:38,813 ♪ But it would never be enough for you ♪ 714 00:31:39,647 --> 00:31:41,190 ♪ I was the one ♪ 715 00:31:41,900 --> 00:31:43,860 ♪ You counted on ♪ 716 00:31:43,860 --> 00:31:48,531 ♪ But I was never the one for you ♪ 717 00:31:49,657 --> 00:31:51,117 ♪ Now I know ♪ 718 00:31:52,410 --> 00:31:56,456 ♪ I lost you a long time ago ♪ 719 00:32:05,131 --> 00:32:07,342 CHILD: Best day ever! 720 00:32:14,140 --> 00:32:16,643 Captioned by Point.360