1 00:00:01,584 --> 00:00:03,545 (wind whistling) 2 00:00:05,880 --> 00:00:09,009 Heave! 3 00:00:09,009 --> 00:00:10,969 Heave, goddamn you! 4 00:00:17,100 --> 00:00:18,643 The horror. 5 00:00:18,643 --> 00:00:20,437 The world must never learn of this! 6 00:00:20,437 --> 00:00:21,896 {\an8}Do you understand?! 7 00:00:21,896 --> 00:00:23,898 Yes! But what should we do with it? 8 00:00:23,898 --> 00:00:25,734 We shall hide it away forever. 9 00:00:25,900 --> 00:00:28,403 Somewhere no respectable person would be caught dead. 10 00:00:28,403 --> 00:00:31,614 The most boring, backwards, piece of shit place 11 00:00:31,614 --> 00:00:33,700 in the entire world. 12 00:00:37,245 --> 00:00:39,622 (sighs) Another successful day 13 00:00:39,622 --> 00:00:41,750 as the town shopkeeper. 14 00:00:41,750 --> 00:00:43,126 - (chatting) - Oi! You two! 15 00:00:43,126 --> 00:00:44,419 You're not allowed to loiter here! 16 00:00:44,419 --> 00:00:47,380 Aw, fuck off! It's a free country, isn't it?! 17 00:00:47,505 --> 00:00:50,050 Yeah, fr-free... what he said. 18 00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:53,803 And what are yooouuu gonna do about it?! 19 00:00:55,805 --> 00:00:58,558 Ugh! Damn it! (groaning) 20 00:00:58,558 --> 00:01:01,936 I'm okay, I'm okay... just did my ankle, I think... 21 00:01:01,936 --> 00:01:03,480 Should be all right... Ugh. 22 00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:05,273 Anyway, Darren and Damo, 23 00:01:05,273 --> 00:01:07,192 I've told you two a million times, 24 00:01:07,192 --> 00:01:08,902 your days of suspicious loitering 25 00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:11,571 and menacing stores of convenience are over. 26 00:01:11,571 --> 00:01:14,866 Oh, you think you're so high and mighty, Koala Man? 27 00:01:14,866 --> 00:01:17,035 You're not even a real superhero. 28 00:01:17,035 --> 00:01:18,203 Everyone hates ya! 29 00:01:18,203 --> 00:01:20,955 Yeah, go away! Fuckin' hate ya! 30 00:01:20,955 --> 00:01:22,999 It's time for you two to be on your way. 31 00:01:22,999 --> 00:01:26,419 What you're doing here is not on. 32 00:01:26,419 --> 00:01:28,213 Ohhh, we'll leave... 33 00:01:28,213 --> 00:01:32,008 as soon as you read the morning headlines! 34 00:01:36,554 --> 00:01:37,931 Ow! It's in my eyes! 35 00:01:37,931 --> 00:01:40,141 - What have you done to my friend? - Jesus! Fuck! 36 00:01:40,141 --> 00:01:42,018 Hey hey hey, don't rub it in. You'll make it worse. 37 00:01:42,018 --> 00:01:43,103 You could scratch your retina. 38 00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:44,479 He was planning something sinister! 39 00:01:44,479 --> 00:01:45,563 I was just trying to help! 40 00:01:45,563 --> 00:01:47,691 You went way too far, Koala Man. 41 00:01:47,691 --> 00:01:50,527 I actually think you seriously injured him. What was in that? 42 00:01:50,527 --> 00:01:53,029 Just eucalyptus oil, because of the koala thing. 43 00:01:53,029 --> 00:01:55,824 Mate, that's poison. I think you should just leave. 44 00:01:55,824 --> 00:01:57,742 - Okay, sorry. Understood, citizen. - (Darren moaning) 45 00:01:57,742 --> 00:02:01,329 - Stay safe. - DARREN: Ow! I think I'm fackin' blind! 46 00:02:01,329 --> 00:02:03,206 KOALA MAN: Some call me a superhero. 47 00:02:03,206 --> 00:02:07,127 I just see myself as a citizen who cares passionately about justice. 48 00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:09,295 Here in the once pristine suburb of Dapto, 49 00:02:09,295 --> 00:02:10,630 I've made it my life's mission 50 00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:12,382 to clean up our streets... 51 00:02:13,299 --> 00:02:14,467 help the innocent... 52 00:02:14,467 --> 00:02:17,012 (cat yowls) 53 00:02:17,012 --> 00:02:18,680 ...and snuff out evil. 54 00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:20,265 Yeah, local code says 55 00:02:20,265 --> 00:02:23,143 this grass is half a centimeter too long, mate. 56 00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:24,519 That was a close one. 57 00:02:24,519 --> 00:02:26,896 Sometimes it feels like I'm the only thing 58 00:02:26,896 --> 00:02:29,566 standing in between this town and anarchy. 59 00:02:29,566 --> 00:02:31,234 But this is my burden. 60 00:02:31,234 --> 00:02:34,446 I have taken up the mantle, for I am... 61 00:02:34,446 --> 00:02:36,322 {\an8}Koala Man! 62 00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,581 {\an8}Today on The Daily Scoff: 63 00:02:44,581 --> 00:02:46,458 {\an8}has local vigilante, nuisance, 64 00:02:46,458 --> 00:02:48,835 and probable violent maniac Koala Man 65 00:02:48,835 --> 00:02:50,628 {\an8}finally gone too far? 66 00:02:50,628 --> 00:02:52,047 {\an8}Yes, yes, he has. 67 00:02:52,047 --> 00:02:54,799 {\an8}After all I do for Dapto, this is what I get? 68 00:02:54,799 --> 00:02:56,468 Dad, don't take this the wrong way, 69 00:02:56,468 --> 00:02:58,928 {\an8}but if people from school ever find out you're Koala Man, 70 00:02:58,928 --> 00:03:00,388 I think I'll genuinely kill myself. 71 00:03:00,388 --> 00:03:01,598 I don't want anyone to find out 72 00:03:01,598 --> 00:03:03,016 {\an8}your identity either, Dad. 73 00:03:03,183 --> 00:03:05,226 {\an8}Because I like having a secret. 74 00:03:05,226 --> 00:03:06,978 Kevin, you know I support your hobby, 75 00:03:06,978 --> 00:03:09,022 but maybe it's time to take a break. Hmm? 76 00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:10,774 {\an8}You missed date night again! 77 00:03:10,774 --> 00:03:12,650 {\an8}I was looking forward to a movie and a cuddle. 78 00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:15,779 Taking a break is just what the forces of evil want me to do, Vicky. 79 00:03:18,156 --> 00:03:20,158 Okay, well, can you at least fix this bloody table, Kevin? 80 00:03:20,158 --> 00:03:22,660 Why would the media treat me this way? 81 00:03:22,660 --> 00:03:24,079 {\an8}(gasps) You know what this is? 82 00:03:24,079 --> 00:03:26,247 Classic case of Tall Poppy Syndrome! 83 00:03:26,247 --> 00:03:27,582 {\an8}What's Tall Poppy Syndrome? 84 00:03:27,582 --> 00:03:29,751 Well, Liam, for reasons unknown, 85 00:03:29,751 --> 00:03:32,337 {\an8}if anyone becomes too successful in Australia, 86 00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:34,589 our fellow citizens feel the need to "cut them down," 87 00:03:34,589 --> 00:03:36,091 like a flower in a field, 88 00:03:36,091 --> 00:03:39,135 so everyone can be at the same level of mediocrity. 89 00:03:39,135 --> 00:03:41,596 That's why those delicious Hemsworths ran off to Hollywood. 90 00:03:42,013 --> 00:03:43,098 Oh, Chris, Liam, and Luke 91 00:03:43,098 --> 00:03:44,849 think they're too good for where they came from? 92 00:03:44,849 --> 00:03:47,477 See what I just did there? That's Tall Poppy Syndrome. 93 00:03:47,477 --> 00:03:48,978 But whatever. I don't care. 94 00:03:48,978 --> 00:03:50,897 I just care about cleaning up this town. 95 00:03:50,897 --> 00:03:52,982 Great! You can start by taking the bins out. 96 00:03:52,982 --> 00:03:54,067 Tomorrow's Bin Day. 97 00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:55,860 Vicky, I know tomorrow's Bin Day. 98 00:03:55,860 --> 00:03:57,737 It's the most important day of the week. 99 00:03:57,737 --> 00:03:59,989 (dramatic music playing) 100 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:04,327 And so it begins. 101 00:04:04,327 --> 00:04:06,955 Honey, Kevin put his bin out! I guess it's Bin Day! 102 00:04:06,955 --> 00:04:09,040 (epic music playing) 103 00:04:12,043 --> 00:04:15,171 Without me, no one in Dapto would even know when to put their bins out. 104 00:04:15,171 --> 00:04:16,923 It's an incredible responsibility, 105 00:04:16,923 --> 00:04:18,466 and one I shall discharge faithfully 106 00:04:18,466 --> 00:04:19,718 as soon as I get home. 107 00:04:19,718 --> 00:04:21,219 ♪ La-di-di-da-da-da... ♪ 108 00:04:21,219 --> 00:04:22,637 Dad's gone crazy, hasn't he? 109 00:04:22,637 --> 00:04:25,598 Oh, Alison, no. 110 00:04:25,598 --> 00:04:27,475 No, noooo. 111 00:04:27,475 --> 00:04:30,520 {\an8}♪ Fishing Big with Big Greg ♪ 112 00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:32,022 {\an8}♪ Master angler ♪ 113 00:04:32,022 --> 00:04:33,440 {\an8}♪ Crocodile mangler ♪ 114 00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:35,900 {\an8}♪ Lady entangler, yeah-- ♪ 115 00:04:35,900 --> 00:04:38,319 Oh, for the love of God. Kevin! 116 00:04:38,653 --> 00:04:39,946 Yes, Big Greg? 117 00:04:39,946 --> 00:04:41,781 {\an8}Kevin, you've got to fix the bloody internet, mate. 118 00:04:41,781 --> 00:04:43,533 I have a Council meeting in five minutes, 119 00:04:43,533 --> 00:04:46,286 and I need to finish this old episode of my show for inspiration. 120 00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:48,371 {\an8}This is the one where I pulled a Peruvian dickfish 121 00:04:48,371 --> 00:04:49,956 {\an8}out of my cameraman's urethra. 122 00:04:49,956 --> 00:04:51,666 (chuckles) Still got the little bugger. 123 00:04:51,666 --> 00:04:53,460 All right, I'll power cycle the modem. 124 00:04:53,460 --> 00:04:54,878 Kind of all I do around here. 125 00:04:54,878 --> 00:04:56,880 That's why we love you, Kevin. 126 00:04:56,880 --> 00:04:58,757 You fix the modem so I can watch me viddies. 127 00:04:58,757 --> 00:05:01,092 And you take the bins out so we all know when to do it. 128 00:05:01,092 --> 00:05:03,053 I'd call that a pretty good life. 129 00:05:03,053 --> 00:05:04,721 Uh, Big Greg, 130 00:05:04,721 --> 00:05:08,266 did the media ever go after you for, like, fighting sharks 131 00:05:08,266 --> 00:05:10,560 and doing what you're certain you were put on this earth to do? 132 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:13,313 Oh, yeah. All the time. Classic Tall Poppy Syndrome. 133 00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:14,814 Bastards. 134 00:05:14,814 --> 00:05:17,067 But that's when I came up with my iconic theme song, 135 00:05:17,067 --> 00:05:18,735 and I realized I could do anything 136 00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:20,779 I wanted as long as I had a catchy tune. 137 00:05:20,779 --> 00:05:23,448 A theme song. Interesting. 138 00:05:23,448 --> 00:05:24,866 Verrrrry interesting. 139 00:05:24,866 --> 00:05:26,826 - (theme song resumes) - Ah, here we go! 140 00:05:26,826 --> 00:05:28,787 If you look carefully, you can see the moment 141 00:05:28,787 --> 00:05:30,497 the cock-guppy enters his penis canal. 142 00:05:30,497 --> 00:05:33,124 -♪ Big Greg ♪ - (cow bell jangles) 143 00:05:34,417 --> 00:05:37,212 Liam, what do you think it feels like to be Rosie Yodels, 144 00:05:37,212 --> 00:05:38,922 the most powerful girl in school, 145 00:05:38,922 --> 00:05:41,216 surrounded by suck-ups like McKayla Taylor Mercedes, 146 00:05:41,216 --> 00:05:43,968 snapping perfectly aloof pictures all the time? 147 00:05:43,968 --> 00:05:46,304 I bet it feels... intoxicating. 148 00:05:46,304 --> 00:05:48,640 I'm not obsessed with popularity like you, Alison. 149 00:05:48,640 --> 00:05:50,767 Besides, we have one thing that makes us cool: 150 00:05:50,892 --> 00:05:53,019 our mum's the canteen lady! 151 00:05:53,019 --> 00:05:55,271 Kevin's just been so preoccupied with being Koala Man 152 00:05:55,271 --> 00:05:56,773 that he's missed every date night. 153 00:05:56,773 --> 00:05:58,942 I've asked him to fix the wobbly table for months, 154 00:05:58,942 --> 00:06:00,110 and he won't even do that. 155 00:06:00,110 --> 00:06:01,611 Well, if you need to motivate Kevin, 156 00:06:01,611 --> 00:06:04,364 whenever my Gerry needed some pep in his step, 157 00:06:04,364 --> 00:06:06,574 I told him to finish between me tits. 158 00:06:06,574 --> 00:06:08,201 God rest his soul. 159 00:06:08,201 --> 00:06:10,078 We haven't been intimate in ages. 160 00:06:10,078 --> 00:06:12,997 (gags) When Gerry couldn't get things done at home, 161 00:06:12,997 --> 00:06:14,874 I always had a power tool on hand 162 00:06:14,874 --> 00:06:16,876 to take care of the problem myself. 163 00:06:16,876 --> 00:06:18,628 Do it myself? 164 00:06:18,628 --> 00:06:19,838 That's it, Janine! 165 00:06:19,838 --> 00:06:21,047 I can get a power tool 166 00:06:21,047 --> 00:06:22,841 and fix that wobbly table myself! 167 00:06:22,841 --> 00:06:24,551 Aw, yeah... that too, I guess. 168 00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:26,761 What are you looking at, you little shit? 169 00:06:26,886 --> 00:06:28,221 Piss off! 170 00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:31,099 - (guitar strumming) - Ah, Liam! 171 00:06:31,099 --> 00:06:33,101 What did I say about leaving your army men on the ground? 172 00:06:33,101 --> 00:06:34,811 It's actually a SwordStorm figurine. 173 00:06:34,811 --> 00:06:37,272 A Praetorian Elder Flame Warrior, to be precise. 174 00:06:37,272 --> 00:06:40,233 I don't care what it is, Liam. I'm always bloody stepping on them. 175 00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:42,861 Do you know how many fathers are paralyzed by sharp toys each year? 176 00:06:42,861 --> 00:06:44,654 I dunno, like... five? 177 00:06:44,654 --> 00:06:47,449 It was a rhetorical question! Now listen to this. 178 00:06:47,449 --> 00:06:49,743 ♪ Koala Man ♪ 179 00:06:49,743 --> 00:06:54,164 ♪ Hero for all the Daptonians ♪ 180 00:06:54,456 --> 00:06:56,207 You reckon that's theme-song worthy? 181 00:06:56,207 --> 00:06:57,751 Um, it's okay. 182 00:06:57,751 --> 00:06:59,627 Okay?! What? No! 183 00:06:59,627 --> 00:07:01,671 This is a "banger," as the kids say. 184 00:07:01,671 --> 00:07:03,965 I just have to lay down all the instrumental tracks. 185 00:07:03,965 --> 00:07:06,551 I'll stay up all night if I have to... 186 00:07:06,551 --> 00:07:09,095 (sighs) And I'll still have time to put the bins out. 187 00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:11,556 - (door opens) - Kevin, I need the drill I got you. 188 00:07:11,556 --> 00:07:14,059 Agh, if this is about the wobbly table, Vicky, 189 00:07:14,059 --> 00:07:15,310 I'll fix it later. 190 00:07:15,310 --> 00:07:16,644 Liam and I are jamming. 191 00:07:16,644 --> 00:07:18,271 Arrr! Rock on! 192 00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:20,190 No, Kevin. I don't want you to fix the table. 193 00:07:20,190 --> 00:07:22,776 Even though some things in this household seem broken beyond repair, 194 00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:24,277 I'm going to at least try to fix them myself. 195 00:07:24,486 --> 00:07:26,154 (drill whirs) 196 00:07:26,154 --> 00:07:28,323 And what a nice project that will be for you. 197 00:07:28,323 --> 00:07:30,033 Make sure to sign it out. 198 00:07:33,536 --> 00:07:36,539 (moans erotically) 199 00:07:36,539 --> 00:07:38,708 Wow! I did it. 200 00:07:38,708 --> 00:07:41,127 Oh! You're incredible. 201 00:07:41,127 --> 00:07:42,962 I'm incredible. 202 00:07:42,962 --> 00:07:44,339 Are you ready to go again? 203 00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:47,133 (drill whirring) 204 00:07:51,846 --> 00:07:54,474 Ah, the life of a rock music writer. 205 00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:56,309 Classic. 206 00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:02,899 Looks like Mrs. Dockery forgot to take her bins out. 207 00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:05,235 Wait. Where are everybody's bins? 208 00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:07,904 Where are my bins?! 209 00:08:07,904 --> 00:08:10,073 I swore I took them out! 210 00:08:14,285 --> 00:08:18,707 You have no idea what you've done. 211 00:08:27,465 --> 00:08:28,883 This isn't enough! 212 00:08:28,883 --> 00:08:30,552 What happened to all the rubbish?! 213 00:08:30,552 --> 00:08:32,220 They didn't put their bins out! 214 00:08:32,220 --> 00:08:33,680 But if we don't get more, we'll-- 215 00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:36,224 (screaming) 216 00:08:36,224 --> 00:08:38,935 HARSH VOICE: Where's my rubbish!? 217 00:08:41,187 --> 00:08:44,816 (neighbors murmuring) 218 00:08:44,816 --> 00:08:46,609 Fuck me dead, Kev, what happened? 219 00:08:46,609 --> 00:08:48,236 I was down at the bowlo last night 220 00:08:48,236 --> 00:08:50,655 telling everyone how good you are at putting the bins out. 221 00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:52,866 We only know when to put 'em out when we see yours! 222 00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:54,451 You've caused a chain reaction! 223 00:08:54,451 --> 00:08:57,162 Spider, I swear, after I finished my... 224 00:08:57,162 --> 00:08:58,496 Koala Man theme song... 225 00:08:58,496 --> 00:09:00,832 I put them out, I know I did. 226 00:09:00,832 --> 00:09:01,916 Didn't I? 227 00:09:01,916 --> 00:09:03,418 Fellow Daptonians! 228 00:09:03,418 --> 00:09:06,171 It seems the entire town has missed Bin Day. 229 00:09:06,171 --> 00:09:08,340 Kevin really cooked the chook on this one. 230 00:09:08,340 --> 00:09:10,842 Everyone say, "Fuck you, Kevin!" 231 00:09:10,842 --> 00:09:14,804 DAPTONIANS: 232 00:09:14,804 --> 00:09:16,306 Fuck you, Kevin! 233 00:09:16,306 --> 00:09:17,891 Alison! That's your dad! 234 00:09:17,891 --> 00:09:18,975 Oh, yeah. 235 00:09:18,975 --> 00:09:20,685 Fuck you, Dad! 236 00:09:20,685 --> 00:09:22,520 Don't worry, I've got a plan. 237 00:09:22,520 --> 00:09:24,689 Just dump your rubbish at Kevin's house! 238 00:09:24,689 --> 00:09:27,484 He'll sort it out, and we'll all go back to bed! 239 00:09:27,484 --> 00:09:29,652 (cheering) 240 00:09:29,652 --> 00:09:32,238 You should be bloody prime minister, Big Greg! 241 00:09:32,238 --> 00:09:35,325 Excuse me, everyone, this is extremely unsanitary. 242 00:09:35,325 --> 00:09:37,410 And I do not approve! 243 00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:39,496 (contemplative music playing) 244 00:09:43,500 --> 00:09:45,418 So many broken things! 245 00:09:45,418 --> 00:09:46,628 Alison, Liam! 246 00:09:46,628 --> 00:09:48,254 Start gathering up all the hard rubbish 247 00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:49,923 you can find and take it into our yard! 248 00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:52,509 - What? Ew, no. - Alison, there comes a time 249 00:09:52,509 --> 00:09:55,679 when the normal life you've come to terms with blows up in your face. 250 00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:57,597 Your husband goes through a midlife koala phase, 251 00:09:57,597 --> 00:09:58,723 and the only thing that makes it better 252 00:09:58,723 --> 00:10:00,100 is the power of a drill in your hand. 253 00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:01,184 (drill whirs) 254 00:10:01,184 --> 00:10:02,394 Liam, come on! 255 00:10:02,394 --> 00:10:03,645 We've got to get our menopausal mummy 256 00:10:03,645 --> 00:10:04,562 some rubbish! 257 00:10:04,562 --> 00:10:06,690 Yay! Mumopause! 258 00:10:07,190 --> 00:10:08,316 How could this have happened? 259 00:10:08,316 --> 00:10:10,443 I could've sworn I took the bins out! 260 00:10:10,568 --> 00:10:13,279 Curse you and your sexy, musical allure! 261 00:10:13,279 --> 00:10:16,950 MASK (evilly): I'm not surprised the town turned against you. 262 00:10:16,950 --> 00:10:19,703 I reckon someone brought the bins back on purpose! 263 00:10:19,703 --> 00:10:22,038 We have a secret enemy! 264 00:10:22,038 --> 00:10:23,790 No, you're paranoid, 265 00:10:23,790 --> 00:10:26,626 even for a manifestation of my shattered psyche. 266 00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:29,087 I'm just trying to keep you safe. 267 00:10:29,087 --> 00:10:31,214 But you always see the worst in everyone. 268 00:10:31,214 --> 00:10:33,425 Maybe I really didn't take the bins out. 269 00:10:33,425 --> 00:10:35,719 I was exhausted from rocking out too hard. 270 00:10:35,719 --> 00:10:38,096 This is our chance, Kevin, 271 00:10:38,096 --> 00:10:41,016 to show the town we're the hero they need. 272 00:10:41,016 --> 00:10:43,018 (pleasantly) By the way, I actually liked the Koala Man theme song. 273 00:10:43,018 --> 00:10:45,103 Like, really, really strong melody. Good job. 274 00:10:45,103 --> 00:10:46,938 Thanks, mate. At least someone gets it. 275 00:10:46,938 --> 00:10:48,982 (evilly) Now what are you waiting for?! 276 00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:52,068 You're the only one who can clean up this rubbish! 277 00:10:52,068 --> 00:10:54,404 (dramatic music rising) 278 00:10:54,404 --> 00:10:56,072 You're right, Koala Mask! 279 00:10:56,322 --> 00:10:58,158 I'll save Dapto by venturing forth 280 00:10:58,158 --> 00:11:00,952 to where the streets have no shame! 281 00:11:01,703 --> 00:11:03,538 Like the U2 song. 282 00:11:03,538 --> 00:11:05,290 Never mind, let's go. 283 00:11:05,415 --> 00:11:06,624 And that's why I always bring 284 00:11:06,624 --> 00:11:08,126 a knife and fork to the bathroom. 285 00:11:08,126 --> 00:11:10,211 We really are the most unpopular kids in school. 286 00:11:10,211 --> 00:11:13,757 Okay, now do one where you're picking up rubbish but like a total slut. 287 00:11:13,757 --> 00:11:15,759 But maybe it's time we did something about it. 288 00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:19,512 - (bowl shatters) - (chuckles) This is so random. 289 00:11:21,556 --> 00:11:22,932 Um, what do you want? 290 00:11:22,932 --> 00:11:24,517 I wanna be a trash slut like Rosie. 291 00:11:24,517 --> 00:11:26,061 Let me set you straight on something. 292 00:11:26,061 --> 00:11:28,396 Nobody gets to Rosie Yodels. No one. 293 00:11:28,396 --> 00:11:31,775 Especially not an unpopular biiiiitch like you. 294 00:11:31,775 --> 00:11:33,485 But isn't there anything I can do? 295 00:11:33,485 --> 00:11:36,071 Hmmm, I suppose if you took a photo that got enough likes, 296 00:11:36,071 --> 00:11:37,405 maybe we'd think about it. 297 00:11:37,405 --> 00:11:39,240 But I doubt that's gonna happen. 298 00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:40,742 Sorryyyyyyyy... 299 00:11:40,742 --> 00:11:42,369 Why would you want to be friends with them? 300 00:11:42,369 --> 00:11:43,495 I don't want to be friends with them, 301 00:11:43,495 --> 00:11:44,537 I want to be them. 302 00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:45,747 I want a bunch of beta orbiters 303 00:11:45,747 --> 00:11:47,165 and simps fawning over me. 304 00:11:47,165 --> 00:11:48,875 I just need a photographer. 305 00:11:48,875 --> 00:11:50,377 I'd be happy to take your photo, 306 00:11:50,377 --> 00:11:51,419 if you'd be willing to paint my 307 00:11:51,419 --> 00:11:52,879 SwordStorm miniatures with me. 308 00:11:52,879 --> 00:11:54,047 No one else will. 309 00:11:54,047 --> 00:11:56,007 Hmmm, big ask. 310 00:11:56,007 --> 00:11:59,094 (scoffs) Okay. I'll paint exactly one figurine with you. 311 00:11:59,094 --> 00:12:01,971 Come on, there's a pile of rotting meat over there. Perfect spot. 312 00:12:02,931 --> 00:12:05,266 Thanks for helping me clean up the rubbish, Spider. 313 00:12:05,266 --> 00:12:06,351 I owe you one. 314 00:12:06,351 --> 00:12:07,519 No worries, mate. 315 00:12:07,519 --> 00:12:09,312 We'll take the ol' ute out as many times 316 00:12:09,312 --> 00:12:11,231 as we have to until we get the job done. 317 00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:13,900 Speaking of getting the job done, I've been thinking. 318 00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:16,820 You need something to take your heroing to the next level. 319 00:12:16,820 --> 00:12:18,113 A gun. 320 00:12:18,113 --> 00:12:20,448 Uh, no thanks, Spider. That's all right. 321 00:12:20,448 --> 00:12:22,534 Could be like a new koala gadget, though. 322 00:12:22,534 --> 00:12:24,994 The safety's jammed so she's always ready to go. 323 00:12:24,994 --> 00:12:26,871 Yeah, that actually makes me want it less, mate. 324 00:12:26,871 --> 00:12:28,832 (sighs) Suit yourself. 325 00:12:28,832 --> 00:12:31,292 I do really need to get rid of it, though. 326 00:12:37,674 --> 00:12:40,844 Typical. The garbage men decided to knock off early. 327 00:12:40,844 --> 00:12:42,762 What happened to municipal spirit? 328 00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:44,639 What happened to the proud Australian civil servant? 329 00:12:44,639 --> 00:12:47,267 - SPIDER: Uh... Koala Man? - What happened to... 330 00:12:48,476 --> 00:12:49,894 What happened to all the rubbish? 331 00:12:53,565 --> 00:12:54,983 My god. 332 00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:57,694 Bloody hell! 333 00:12:57,694 --> 00:13:00,321 I didn't know you could dump dead bodies here! 334 00:13:04,701 --> 00:13:06,995 These poor, innocent garbos. 335 00:13:06,995 --> 00:13:09,289 Ugh... 336 00:13:09,289 --> 00:13:12,459 Evil has been set loose. 337 00:13:12,459 --> 00:13:15,628 Who did this to you, Wizened Garbage Man?! 338 00:13:15,628 --> 00:13:17,422 The Tall Poppy. 339 00:13:17,422 --> 00:13:20,133 Ah, yeah? Some cunt thinking he's better than us? 340 00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:22,260 I knew it! Probably from Adelaide. 341 00:13:22,260 --> 00:13:24,429 No, you dickheads! 342 00:13:24,429 --> 00:13:26,848 The real Tall Poppy! 343 00:13:26,848 --> 00:13:30,018 A creature of flowers and thorns 344 00:13:30,018 --> 00:13:33,438 pulled from under the ice of Antarctica... 345 00:13:33,438 --> 00:13:36,941 and hidden here where it could eat rubbish in peace. 346 00:13:36,941 --> 00:13:38,234 All right, grab those copper pipes, 347 00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:39,736 we'll take 'em down to Cashie's. 348 00:13:39,736 --> 00:13:41,696 (creature snarling) 349 00:13:41,696 --> 00:13:43,448 Oi... who's there?! 350 00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:46,117 Reveal ya self... fuckwit! 351 00:13:46,117 --> 00:13:47,744 (snarling) 352 00:13:47,744 --> 00:13:49,996 Give me rubbish! 353 00:13:50,747 --> 00:13:53,500 Why should we, you flower fuck?! 354 00:13:54,125 --> 00:13:55,418 Aw, come on, man. 355 00:13:55,418 --> 00:13:58,004 Someone took all the top-notch rubbish, 356 00:13:58,004 --> 00:14:00,173 and I've gotta get my garb on. 357 00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:01,800 You've got a problem, mate. 358 00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:04,761 Yeah, my problem is you won't give me my fuckin' shit! 359 00:14:04,928 --> 00:14:06,721 (snarling) 360 00:14:09,099 --> 00:14:12,894 Mmm! The people here are rubbish too! 361 00:14:16,106 --> 00:14:17,816 Aw, yeah. 362 00:14:17,816 --> 00:14:20,360 That's the good shit right there. 363 00:14:22,362 --> 00:14:26,408 We made the phrase "Tall Poppy" synonymous with evil, 364 00:14:26,408 --> 00:14:28,284 something to destroy, so... 365 00:14:28,284 --> 00:14:31,705 (groans) ...that if the real creature ever escaped, 366 00:14:31,705 --> 00:14:34,374 we Australians would know what to do. 367 00:14:34,374 --> 00:14:38,670 And now it has been unleashed because the bins didn't go out. 368 00:14:38,670 --> 00:14:40,338 Okay, yeah, pretty straightforward. 369 00:14:40,630 --> 00:14:44,342 Stop the Tall Poppy or we're all doomed! 370 00:14:44,342 --> 00:14:45,802 Ughhhh... 371 00:14:45,802 --> 00:14:48,096 Spider, we have to get back quick! 372 00:14:48,096 --> 00:14:50,265 The old man said that thing loves to eat rubbish, 373 00:14:50,265 --> 00:14:51,599 and my house is covered in it! 374 00:14:51,599 --> 00:14:53,601 (gunshot) 375 00:14:53,601 --> 00:14:55,353 Spider?! What did you do that for?! 376 00:14:55,353 --> 00:14:56,563 In case he turned. 377 00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:58,273 I didn't know if this was zombie rules. 378 00:14:58,273 --> 00:14:59,607 Can't be too careful. 379 00:14:59,607 --> 00:15:01,651 Jesus Christ, Spi-- That was a human being. 380 00:15:02,152 --> 00:15:04,070 Just get in the car, mate, let's go. 381 00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:05,947 (sighs) 382 00:15:05,947 --> 00:15:08,074 I've done it. I've fixed everything. 383 00:15:08,074 --> 00:15:10,869 Lawnmowers, a Sega Saturn, a Barcelona chair. 384 00:15:10,869 --> 00:15:12,662 They're all perfect again. 385 00:15:12,662 --> 00:15:15,373 Oh, but there must be something else to fix! 386 00:15:15,373 --> 00:15:18,084 Perhaps... my life? 387 00:15:18,084 --> 00:15:20,295 Uh-oh. Oh, no. 388 00:15:20,295 --> 00:15:22,422 No, I'm starting to have thoughts I don't want. 389 00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:25,383 Oh, here they come. Why did I settle down? 390 00:15:25,383 --> 00:15:27,177 Is this it? Aaah! 391 00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:30,305 Let me see... 392 00:15:30,305 --> 00:15:32,557 No, no, no! It looks way too planned. 393 00:15:32,557 --> 00:15:34,309 It has to look candid, Liam. 394 00:15:34,309 --> 00:15:36,603 McKayla and Rosie will see through this in a second! 395 00:15:36,603 --> 00:15:39,064 Or we could, I don't know... 396 00:15:39,064 --> 00:15:40,982 paint a Mechanized Duelist who specializes 397 00:15:40,982 --> 00:15:42,442 in fighting oversized creatures! 398 00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:44,819 All he needs is a good dry brush and he can go into battle. 399 00:15:44,819 --> 00:15:46,821 (scoffs) Forget it! I'm gonna take the picture myself. 400 00:15:46,821 --> 00:15:49,115 All right. But this could've been the soldier 401 00:15:49,282 --> 00:15:50,617 that ended the Kthtquian war. 402 00:15:50,617 --> 00:15:53,661 - (ominous music playing) - (feet pounding) 403 00:15:54,496 --> 00:15:56,498 (roaring) 404 00:15:56,498 --> 00:15:59,542 What the hell are you?! Get out of our yard! 405 00:15:59,542 --> 00:16:02,504 (snarls) I'm gonna eat your rubbish, 406 00:16:02,504 --> 00:16:04,964 and then I'm gonna eat you too. 407 00:16:05,256 --> 00:16:07,342 'Cause you're rubbish as well. 408 00:16:07,509 --> 00:16:08,885 And then I'm... 409 00:16:08,885 --> 00:16:11,054 gonna get help. I swear to god, this is the last time. 410 00:16:11,054 --> 00:16:13,181 I know I'm addicted. I know, I'm aware. 411 00:16:13,181 --> 00:16:15,016 Please don't judge me. (roars) 412 00:16:15,350 --> 00:16:17,185 (screaming) Uch, gross! 413 00:16:17,185 --> 00:16:20,105 - Alison! - Hey! Tall Poppy! 414 00:16:20,105 --> 00:16:21,398 Who the fuck are you? 415 00:16:21,398 --> 00:16:23,316 They call me Koala Man, 416 00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:25,276 and Dapto is my town. 417 00:16:25,276 --> 00:16:27,195 Release the girl, Tall Poppy. 418 00:16:27,195 --> 00:16:29,072 This is not on! 419 00:16:29,072 --> 00:16:31,950 Oh, but it is on, Koala Man! 420 00:16:31,950 --> 00:16:34,869 By that I mean the battle we are about to have! 421 00:16:34,869 --> 00:16:37,247 (epic music playing) 422 00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:43,920 Ah, this town is so full of walking trash! 423 00:16:43,920 --> 00:16:46,089 Why would I ever go back to my hole? 424 00:16:46,089 --> 00:16:48,174 This is my town now! 425 00:16:48,174 --> 00:16:50,677 - Never! - (snarling) Yaaa! 426 00:16:50,677 --> 00:16:52,721 (screams) 427 00:16:53,805 --> 00:16:55,598 (electric guitar scratching) 428 00:16:55,598 --> 00:16:58,351 ♪ Koala Man, hero for all ♪ 429 00:16:58,351 --> 00:17:00,478 ♪ Daptonians ♪ 430 00:17:00,478 --> 00:17:03,398 Oi, Koala Man! Sick theme song! 431 00:17:03,398 --> 00:17:04,774 ♪ Fighter of crime ♪ 432 00:17:04,899 --> 00:17:06,151 ♪ Defender of the way ♪ 433 00:17:06,151 --> 00:17:08,069 If only there were something we could do! 434 00:17:08,069 --> 00:17:10,613 Wait! The Mechanized Duelist! 435 00:17:10,613 --> 00:17:14,367 They specialize in fighting oversized creatures. 436 00:17:17,037 --> 00:17:19,414 Mum, do you think you could fix up some of this stuff 437 00:17:19,414 --> 00:17:20,665 if I told you what it should look like? 438 00:17:20,665 --> 00:17:22,542 I can fix anything. 439 00:17:22,542 --> 00:17:24,502 (roaring) 440 00:17:24,502 --> 00:17:26,671 (Koala Man groaning) 441 00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:33,053 Stop moving! You're messing up my perfect selfie! 442 00:17:36,431 --> 00:17:37,891 (Tall Poppy chuckles) 443 00:17:37,891 --> 00:17:39,351 (roars) 444 00:17:39,476 --> 00:17:41,811 Hey, you! Mr. Scary Monster! 445 00:17:41,811 --> 00:17:45,065 Looks like my miniature skills are about to pay off, Alison! 446 00:17:47,150 --> 00:17:49,110 Uh, Mum! Something's wrong with the engine. 447 00:17:49,110 --> 00:17:50,653 Engine? Liam, I'm not a mechanic. 448 00:17:50,653 --> 00:17:51,571 This thing can't move! 449 00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:53,656 Ah. Then this was a bad plan. 450 00:17:53,656 --> 00:17:55,450 Liam, you're a fucking idiot! 451 00:17:55,450 --> 00:17:56,576 That's okay, son! 452 00:17:56,826 --> 00:17:59,621 Trying is the first step toward succeeding! 453 00:17:59,954 --> 00:18:02,165 Look, you seem like a good bloke, 454 00:18:02,165 --> 00:18:04,876 but I just really need to eat all this yummy trash. 455 00:18:04,876 --> 00:18:06,586 It's just... it's just too delicious. 456 00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:08,922 You forgot one thing, Tall Poppy. 457 00:18:08,922 --> 00:18:11,925 One man's trash is another man's treasure. 458 00:18:11,925 --> 00:18:13,927 Uh, yeah, that's why I'm eating it, cunt. 459 00:18:13,927 --> 00:18:15,387 Eat this! 460 00:18:15,387 --> 00:18:18,640 (roaring) 461 00:18:20,016 --> 00:18:22,727 Oww! Who bloody put that there?! 462 00:18:22,727 --> 00:18:24,854 - (thuds) - (Tall Poppy groans) 463 00:18:24,854 --> 00:18:26,773 (liquid burbling) 464 00:18:32,612 --> 00:18:35,156 Oh, we're alive, dickhead! 465 00:18:35,156 --> 00:18:38,076 Yeah, and we smell so good! 466 00:18:38,076 --> 00:18:39,452 (sniffs) Oh! 467 00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:44,958 Liam, thank Christ for your dumb, stupid toys! 468 00:18:44,958 --> 00:18:47,585 That's all I ever wanted to hear, Dad. 469 00:18:47,585 --> 00:18:51,673 (Tall Poppy snarling) 470 00:18:53,383 --> 00:18:56,386 Guess I just saw a flower monster 471 00:18:56,386 --> 00:18:59,222 die in front of me... vibe. 472 00:18:59,222 --> 00:19:03,643 (neighbors shouting, jeering) 473 00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:06,813 It's time, fellow Daptonians! 474 00:19:06,813 --> 00:19:08,440 Kill the beast! 475 00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:13,153 I'm sorry. I only wanted to clean up the town. 476 00:19:13,153 --> 00:19:14,654 - (crowd jeering) - (Tall Poppy weeping) 477 00:19:14,654 --> 00:19:16,364 Wait! 478 00:19:16,364 --> 00:19:18,700 Look, I know you all want to kill this flower, 479 00:19:18,700 --> 00:19:21,870 but don't you see that by chopping down the Tall Poppy, 480 00:19:21,870 --> 00:19:25,123 we're really chopping down ourselves? 481 00:19:25,123 --> 00:19:26,875 He just wanted to clean up Dapto. 482 00:19:26,875 --> 00:19:28,793 Just like me. And yes, 483 00:19:28,793 --> 00:19:31,171 maybe he went on a murderous rampage, 484 00:19:31,171 --> 00:19:33,923 but sometimes you can't help but be what you are. 485 00:19:33,923 --> 00:19:35,633 He's a Tall Poppy. 486 00:19:35,633 --> 00:19:37,385 I'm a superhero. 487 00:19:37,385 --> 00:19:39,512 And we're all in this together. 488 00:19:39,512 --> 00:19:41,014 (sniffles) Fuck... 489 00:19:41,014 --> 00:19:42,474 That was fuckin' awesome. 490 00:19:42,474 --> 00:19:44,851 That was like a scene from a movie or some shit. 491 00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:46,436 What, you think you're better than us 492 00:19:46,436 --> 00:19:48,438 just 'cause you're trying to teach us a lesson? 493 00:19:48,438 --> 00:19:50,023 Oh, la-di-dah! 494 00:19:50,023 --> 00:19:51,733 Fuck off, Koala Man! 495 00:19:51,733 --> 00:19:53,443 You're not better than me! 496 00:19:53,443 --> 00:19:55,904 You know what? I've got an idea! 497 00:19:55,904 --> 00:19:59,032 Let's spare the Tall Poppy! I mean, he's just a bloke 498 00:19:59,032 --> 00:20:01,493 trying to get on in this world, for heaven's sake! 499 00:20:01,493 --> 00:20:02,911 - (cheering) - Are you serious? 500 00:20:02,911 --> 00:20:04,746 I just said exactly what he just said. 501 00:20:04,746 --> 00:20:07,999 CROWD: Big Greg is nice! Big Greg is nice! 502 00:20:07,999 --> 00:20:09,542 Send him to the shithole where we send 503 00:20:09,542 --> 00:20:12,212 all our cleaned-up junkies: Hollywood! 504 00:20:12,212 --> 00:20:15,048 - (cheering) - TALL POPPY: Yay! Thank you. 505 00:20:15,715 --> 00:20:17,133 So? Did you see the picture I posted? 506 00:20:17,133 --> 00:20:18,510 Pretty aloof, right? 507 00:20:18,510 --> 00:20:20,178 Um, sweetie, I hate to say it, 508 00:20:20,178 --> 00:20:22,639 but it looked like you were trying too hard. 509 00:20:22,639 --> 00:20:23,932 - What?! - Yeah. 510 00:20:23,932 --> 00:20:25,433 And I guess someone posted it on a cringe page 511 00:20:25,433 --> 00:20:26,643 and now you're kind of famous 512 00:20:26,643 --> 00:20:27,727 for being cringe? 513 00:20:27,727 --> 00:20:29,979 But I'll tell Rosie you said hiiii. 514 00:20:30,689 --> 00:20:33,733 Well played, McKayla Taylor Mercedes, well played. 515 00:20:33,733 --> 00:20:36,277 But I will become the most powerful girl in school. 516 00:20:36,277 --> 00:20:39,948 And you're going to find out exactly how far I'll go to do it. 517 00:20:42,826 --> 00:20:44,369 You saved Dapto, Kevin. 518 00:20:44,369 --> 00:20:47,080 Even if I find this Koala Man stuff odd... 519 00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:49,207 infuriating, really... 520 00:20:49,207 --> 00:20:52,168 maybe the lesson is you shouldn't try to fix broken things. 521 00:20:52,168 --> 00:20:53,753 Just, you know, bury them 522 00:20:53,753 --> 00:20:56,589 till they surface as a problem too big to ignore. 523 00:20:57,257 --> 00:20:59,843 What I'm trying to say is... I'm proud of you. 524 00:20:59,843 --> 00:21:02,804 Yes, well... I wish I could compliment you back, Vicky. 525 00:21:02,804 --> 00:21:05,348 But you did illegally tamper with our neighbors' rubbish, 526 00:21:05,348 --> 00:21:08,184 and I really should report it. 527 00:21:08,184 --> 00:21:10,562 (sighs) Let's go home, Kevin. 528 00:21:10,562 --> 00:21:13,314 Yeah, I'm catching a flight tonight to Portland. 529 00:21:13,314 --> 00:21:14,983 - I just need to get away. - (doorbell rings) 530 00:21:14,983 --> 00:21:17,027 Hold on, there's someone at the door. 531 00:21:17,819 --> 00:21:21,114 I couldn't let you leave... without saying goodbye. 532 00:21:21,114 --> 00:21:22,949 Because I'm dying. 533 00:21:23,867 --> 00:21:25,785 He's a pretty good actor, actually. 534 00:21:25,785 --> 00:21:27,037 I'm happy for him. 535 00:21:27,037 --> 00:21:28,913 I heard he kicked the rubbish addiction too. 536 00:21:28,913 --> 00:21:30,790 I can't believe he was only in Hollywood for a few days 537 00:21:30,790 --> 00:21:32,584 and he's already starring with Alexandra Daddario 538 00:21:32,584 --> 00:21:34,377 in a $1.5 million A24 movie. 539 00:21:34,377 --> 00:21:36,504 Ah... the dream... 540 00:21:36,504 --> 00:21:38,965 Kevin, what are you doing? 541 00:21:38,965 --> 00:21:42,093 Whoever compromised the bins is still out there! 542 00:21:42,093 --> 00:21:43,345 Hush, koala thoughts. 543 00:21:43,345 --> 00:21:45,555 I'm having date night with my best gal... 544 00:21:45,555 --> 00:21:48,099 though I still swear I took those bins out... 545 00:21:48,099 --> 00:21:50,018 - What's that, Kevin? - Nothing, darling! 546 00:21:50,018 --> 00:21:52,479 Shall we cuddle... in bed? 547 00:21:52,729 --> 00:21:54,356 Oh, Kevin! 548 00:21:54,356 --> 00:21:56,232 Mwah! 549 00:21:58,777 --> 00:22:01,029 Everything is going according to plan. 550 00:22:01,029 --> 00:22:03,406 Of course you took the bins out, Kevin. 551 00:22:03,406 --> 00:22:06,576 But I brought them back up so it looked like you never did. 552 00:22:06,576 --> 00:22:09,245 First, I'll take your sanity. 553 00:22:09,245 --> 00:22:12,832 Then I'll take everything from you, Koala Man! 554 00:22:12,999 --> 00:22:16,461 The Kookaburra will have the last laugh! 555 00:22:16,461 --> 00:22:20,256 (hysterical laughter) 556 00:22:20,256 --> 00:22:21,591 I'm the Kookaburra! 557 00:22:22,592 --> 00:22:24,219 ♪ Koala Man ♪ 558 00:22:24,219 --> 00:22:25,512 ♪ Hero for all ♪ 559 00:22:25,512 --> 00:22:28,932 ♪ The Daptonians ♪ 560 00:22:28,932 --> 00:22:30,517 ♪ Koala Man ♪ 561 00:22:30,517 --> 00:22:31,851 ♪ Fighter of crime ♪ 562 00:22:31,851 --> 00:22:35,105 ♪ And defender of the way ♪ 563 00:22:35,105 --> 00:22:38,191 ♪ Koala Man ♪ 564 00:22:38,191 --> 00:22:40,860 ♪ He'll take a stand ♪ 565 00:22:40,860 --> 00:22:44,114 ♪ He'll rid the lands ♪ 566 00:22:44,280 --> 00:22:47,534 ♪ Of evil plans ♪ 567 00:22:47,534 --> 00:22:49,619 ♪ Yeah-eah-eah! ♪ 568 00:23:00,130 --> 00:23:03,133 Captioned by Point.360