1
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(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
2
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(ALARM CLOCK RINGS)
3
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(SLURPING)
4
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(LIGHTSABERS BUZZ)
5
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(EXPLOSION)
6
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(RUSTLING)
7
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(SCREAMS)
8
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LOUIS: Hey, Ren, did you know
there's a crawl space up here
9
00:00:55,947 --> 00:00:57,324
that's perfect for Mom and Dad
10
00:00:57,391 --> 00:00:58,767
to hide the Hanukkah presents?
11
00:00:59,034 --> 00:01:01,453
Give it up, Louis. You are
never going to find them.
12
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(GRUNTS)
13
00:01:03,307 --> 00:01:04,438
You want to bet?
14
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Do you want to bet?
15
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See, look, this is how I see it.
16
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We get one gift for
each night of Hanukkah.
17
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There are three of
us, and eight nights.
18
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So that makes...
19
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Who cares? It doesn't matter.
20
00:01:16,753 --> 00:01:18,162
I don't do math on Hanukkah.
21
00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:20,540
If we just constantly
search the house, you know,
22
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so I think if we
just... Oh! My bed!
23
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Ow! I'm sorry. Oh!
24
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- My soda!
- I'll clean it up.
25
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- My books!
- Ow!
26
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My board!
27
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Me, me, me.
28
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That's all I ever get from you.
29
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You are so toast!
30
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Hey, Louis, check it out, man.
31
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I finally got my MVP trophy.
32
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That's cool.
33
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- It's payback time, you airhead!
- (LOUIS SCREAMS)
34
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Hey! Trophies!
35
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(DONNIE SCREAMS)
36
00:01:46,917 --> 00:01:48,911
My... trophies.
37
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Way to go, Ren.
38
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Presents.
39
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They got to be here somewhere.
40
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(ELECTRONIC VOICE)
Last year's hideout.
41
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(SCOFFS) Yeah, right.
42
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Wait a second.
43
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That's the one place
they know I'd never look.
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(TRIUMPHANT MUSIC)
45
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(SLOT MACHINE COINS CLANKING)
46
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(INHALING)
47
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Mom, you haven't told
us the story of Hanukkah
48
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- since we were little kids.
- Well...
49
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a long time ago your
ancient ancestors...
50
00:03:03,209 --> 00:03:05,061
from my side of the family...
51
00:03:05,837 --> 00:03:06,837
were being persecuted
52
00:03:07,004 --> 00:03:09,091
by a group of oppressors
who were trying
53
00:03:09,233 --> 00:03:11,986
to get the Jewish people to
give up their religious beliefs.
54
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But a small army
called the Maccabees,
55
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decided to fight back.
56
00:03:16,714 --> 00:03:19,509
Louis should really be
here. He loves this story.
57
00:03:19,676 --> 00:03:21,762
He's probably
trying to find the gifts.
58
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Well, don't worry. He's not
gonna find them this year.
59
00:03:24,647 --> 00:03:27,967
So, the Maccabees finally
drove the oppressors out of Israel
60
00:03:28,134 --> 00:03:30,403
and reclaimed their temple.
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00:03:34,973 --> 00:03:37,127
EILEEN: Once inside,
they lit the oil lamp
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which was never
to be extinguished.
63
00:03:39,428 --> 00:03:40,897
But there was a problem.
64
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They only had
enough oil for one day.
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Somehow, the oil lamp stayed lit
66
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for eight days and eight nights.
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00:03:48,712 --> 00:03:52,016
Which is why now we light
eight candles for Hanukkah.
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It truly was... A miracle.
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I got everything I wanted.
70
00:03:57,179 --> 00:03:59,099
STEVE: Hey, Lou,
are you up there?
71
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Come in.
72
00:04:15,267 --> 00:04:17,000
Lou, where were you?
73
00:04:17,134 --> 00:04:18,484
You missed the
story of Hanukkah.
74
00:04:18,609 --> 00:04:20,937
Oh, well, my stomach's
feeling a little queasy.
75
00:04:21,104 --> 00:04:22,489
Thanks for stopping by.
76
00:04:23,991 --> 00:04:26,316
Are you sure? You want
something to settle your stomach?
77
00:04:26,427 --> 00:04:28,763
I'm very settled.
Very, completely...
78
00:04:28,929 --> 00:04:30,263
- (RIPPING)
- very settled.
79
00:04:30,430 --> 00:04:32,207
Thanks for stopping by, though.
80
00:04:32,980 --> 00:04:34,408
- (RIPPING)
- No!
81
00:04:35,086 --> 00:04:36,583
I thought you
wanted me to leave.
82
00:04:36,749 --> 00:04:39,765
(RUMBLING AND CRASHING)
83
00:04:39,887 --> 00:04:40,887
What was that?
84
00:04:40,980 --> 00:04:43,051
Uh... more settling?
85
00:04:43,218 --> 00:04:45,751
REN: There's a pile of
smashed stuff outside!
86
00:04:45,917 --> 00:04:48,957
EILEEN: Oh, no! He
found the presents!
87
00:04:51,026 --> 00:04:52,841
Louis Anthony Stevens...
88
00:04:53,008 --> 00:04:55,802
why did you throw the Hanukkah
presents out the window?
89
00:04:55,969 --> 00:04:59,710
Uh... STEVE: Oh, no!
90
00:04:59,935 --> 00:05:00,993
DONNIE: Man!
91
00:05:01,084 --> 00:05:03,171
Hey, it's not my fault we
live in a two-story house.
92
00:05:03,346 --> 00:05:05,627
I have always said that I
like ranch style, right, Donnie?
93
00:05:05,696 --> 00:05:07,275
Cut it out, Louis!
94
00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:10,150
You been trying to sneak a
peek at those gifts all week.
95
00:05:10,245 --> 00:05:12,523
REN: I don't get it. I'm a
good person, respect my family,
96
00:05:12,547 --> 00:05:14,165
and I call my
grandparents once a week.
97
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What did I do to deserve
a brother like him?
98
00:05:17,110 --> 00:05:18,679
Is this going to
happen again next week
99
00:05:18,854 --> 00:05:21,054
when my cousins are here to
celebrate Christmas with us?
100
00:05:21,179 --> 00:05:23,487
Well, see, that depends. Are
they going to bring presents?
101
00:05:23,654 --> 00:05:25,127
(GASPS)
102
00:05:25,252 --> 00:05:26,740
Just trying to
lighten the moment.
103
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Guys, look, look,
I got a little crazy
104
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so I opened the presents.
105
00:05:30,056 --> 00:05:31,910
Come on, guys,
seriously, I just tried...
106
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Louis! Enough!
107
00:05:34,094 --> 00:05:35,859
You are grounded for Hanukkah.
108
00:05:40,779 --> 00:05:43,186
REN: What did I do to
deserve a brother like you?
109
00:05:43,353 --> 00:05:45,721
LOUIS: (ECHOING)
I don't know! Louis!
110
00:05:45,837 --> 00:05:47,646
DONNIE: (ECHOING) My trophies!
111
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EILEEN: (ECHOING) You
are grounded for Hanukkah.
112
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You are grounded.
You are grounded...
113
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LOUIS: Who cares?
114
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I don't belong
down there anyway.
115
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I don't belong in this family.
116
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It would be better
if I was never born.
117
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(WIND BLOWING)
118
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(YELLING)
119
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(SCREAMS)
120
00:06:25,529 --> 00:06:27,323
So, the world really is flat.
121
00:06:28,324 --> 00:06:29,724
What are you doing here?
122
00:06:29,866 --> 00:06:31,709
That's the way you speak
to your Bubbie Rose?
123
00:06:31,876 --> 00:06:33,411
My booby what?
124
00:06:34,836 --> 00:06:36,505
Your Bubbie Rose.
125
00:06:36,965 --> 00:06:40,802
I am your great-great-
great-great-grandmother.
126
00:06:40,969 --> 00:06:42,370
- Oh, that's great.
- Mm.
127
00:06:43,604 --> 00:06:45,056
That's a lie, also.
128
00:06:45,248 --> 00:06:47,917
Because, if that was the
truth, you would be a ghost
129
00:06:48,084 --> 00:06:49,919
and you don't look
like a ghost. Sorry.
130
00:06:50,086 --> 00:06:51,754
Better I should put a
sheet over my head
131
00:06:51,921 --> 00:06:52,922
and go, "Boo"?
132
00:06:53,089 --> 00:06:54,257
Yeah, that might help.
133
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- Boo!
- (SCREAMS)
134
00:07:02,251 --> 00:07:03,566
(LAUGHING)
135
00:07:03,733 --> 00:07:04,901
Relax, relax.
136
00:07:05,067 --> 00:07:09,222
I'm only here to make sure
that you have a nice holiday.
137
00:07:09,389 --> 00:07:12,909
Well, uh... you're
too late, see?
138
00:07:13,076 --> 00:07:15,086
'Cause I already
single-handedly ruined Hanukkah.
139
00:07:15,261 --> 00:07:17,380
Listen to the ego in that boy.
140
00:07:17,497 --> 00:07:18,739
Hm!
141
00:07:18,932 --> 00:07:21,843
Our family has been
celebrating Hanukkah
142
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for 2,100 years.
143
00:07:24,439 --> 00:07:25,607
LOUIS: Right.
144
00:07:25,774 --> 00:07:30,168
You think, because
you broke a few gifts...
145
00:07:30,393 --> 00:07:33,054
- (LAUGHING)
- It's...
146
00:07:33,221 --> 00:07:36,141
You think a few broken gifts
are going to ruin the holiday?
147
00:07:36,308 --> 00:07:38,143
Wait. Wait. How did
you know about that?
148
00:07:38,310 --> 00:07:40,312
Oh, I know everything.
149
00:07:40,603 --> 00:07:43,123
What? I been around
the block a few times.
150
00:07:44,523 --> 00:07:46,493
Well... well, then do
you know what it's like
151
00:07:46,659 --> 00:07:47,860
to have a brother and sister
152
00:07:48,027 --> 00:07:50,279
who are always perfect
all the time, hmm?
153
00:07:50,520 --> 00:07:52,265
And do you know what it's like
154
00:07:52,431 --> 00:07:54,392
to have 7,000 grandchildren...
155
00:07:54,683 --> 00:07:56,560
and not one of them calls?
156
00:07:57,002 --> 00:07:58,003
Come on.
157
00:07:58,070 --> 00:07:59,310
We're gonna take a little ride.
158
00:07:59,371 --> 00:08:01,107
No, I can't. I thought
you knew everything.
159
00:08:01,282 --> 00:08:02,408
I'm grounded, you remember?
160
00:08:02,539 --> 00:08:05,386
This is not exactly
a ride on the ground.
161
00:08:06,295 --> 00:08:08,348
Here. Put this on.
162
00:08:08,515 --> 00:08:10,650
I don't want you should
catch pneumonia.
163
00:08:10,893 --> 00:08:11,901
Okay.
164
00:08:12,067 --> 00:08:14,929
I may be a ghost but
I am still your bubbie.
165
00:08:15,129 --> 00:08:16,589
Yes, I know.
166
00:08:17,323 --> 00:08:19,199
LOUIS: (SCREAMS) We're flying!
167
00:08:19,366 --> 00:08:21,285
ROSE: Oh, don't talk so much.
168
00:08:21,452 --> 00:08:22,996
You'll get bugs in your teeth.
169
00:08:23,163 --> 00:08:25,607
LOUIS: Right... so,
uh... where we going?
170
00:08:25,774 --> 00:08:28,360
ROSE: Where we going?
We're going out for a Danish.
171
00:08:28,526 --> 00:08:30,019
Don't worry where we're going.
172
00:08:30,186 --> 00:08:31,446
Enjoy the view.
173
00:08:32,947 --> 00:08:34,156
(GRUNTING)
174
00:08:34,323 --> 00:08:37,953
(GROANING)
175
00:08:38,152 --> 00:08:40,496
Who puts a gnome on a lawn?
176
00:08:41,163 --> 00:08:43,499
(BOTH GROANING)
177
00:08:43,666 --> 00:08:45,668
Wait, wait, wait.
Here, wait, wait.
178
00:08:45,835 --> 00:08:47,003
No, I'm fine.
179
00:08:47,169 --> 00:08:48,563
Stop with the brushing.
180
00:08:49,296 --> 00:08:50,614
Yeah, we're at my house.
181
00:08:50,781 --> 00:08:52,667
Well, yes and no.
182
00:08:53,492 --> 00:08:57,448
Remember you said you didn't
want to be a member of this family?
183
00:08:58,313 --> 00:09:00,099
I'm going to show
you what it was like
184
00:09:00,266 --> 00:09:01,484
if you was never born.
185
00:09:02,194 --> 00:09:04,353
Louis, take a look.
186
00:09:04,503 --> 00:09:06,489
Uncle Leo sent you
some Hanukkah cash.
187
00:09:06,565 --> 00:09:07,731
REN: Oh!
188
00:09:08,024 --> 00:09:09,275
LOUIS: I... I'm grounded...
189
00:09:09,442 --> 00:09:11,652
I just remembered...
so I better get in, okay?
190
00:09:12,019 --> 00:09:13,070
No, no, no, no.
191
00:09:13,170 --> 00:09:15,148
How could you be grounded
if you were never born?
192
00:09:15,315 --> 00:09:17,016
Oh, I was never born, huh?
193
00:09:17,266 --> 00:09:18,684
Then could I do this?
194
00:09:19,809 --> 00:09:20,945
That didn't hurt.
195
00:09:21,612 --> 00:09:23,131
But that hurt.
196
00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:24,666
Yeah, I'm definitely born.
197
00:09:24,774 --> 00:09:26,467
It was... it was lots
of fun. Thank you.
198
00:09:26,642 --> 00:09:28,877
Louis, they can't see
you. They can't hear you.
199
00:09:29,044 --> 00:09:30,045
Whatever you say.
200
00:09:30,211 --> 00:09:32,672
Give my regards to
Casper, okay? Stay.
201
00:09:32,839 --> 00:09:34,215
ROSE. Wait, wait, wait, wait.
202
00:09:34,451 --> 00:09:36,859
Honey, I'll put this gift
money in the hall tray,
203
00:09:36,970 --> 00:09:39,246
- and we'll give it out after dinner.
- Guys,
204
00:09:39,371 --> 00:09:41,171
I know I'm still
grounded and everything
205
00:09:41,346 --> 00:09:43,908
but, uh, I just had the
weirdest thing happen to me.
206
00:09:44,019 --> 00:09:45,629
Son!
207
00:09:46,952 --> 00:09:48,197
EILEEN: You're back!
208
00:09:51,999 --> 00:09:53,083
Who's that?
209
00:09:53,250 --> 00:09:55,169
Well, you were never born.
210
00:09:55,336 --> 00:09:57,530
So, your parents went
and they had someone else.
211
00:09:58,374 --> 00:10:01,228
So, Curtis, what did
Principal Wexler say?
212
00:10:01,478 --> 00:10:03,998
Well, he said because
of my perfect grades
213
00:10:04,098 --> 00:10:06,633
and record-breaking
athletic performances
214
00:10:06,800 --> 00:10:09,335
that the school
board has voted me...
215
00:10:10,661 --> 00:10:13,103
Best All-Around
Student of All Time!
216
00:10:13,270 --> 00:10:14,563
(GASPING)
217
00:10:14,730 --> 00:10:15,981
STEVE: Did you hear that, kids?
218
00:10:16,148 --> 00:10:18,328
Your little brother
is a superstar!
219
00:10:19,222 --> 00:10:21,322
This is the proudest
day of my life.
220
00:10:21,572 --> 00:10:24,584
CURTIS: Well, I only wish I
could do more for you guys.
221
00:10:36,664 --> 00:10:37,764
Ow!
222
00:10:37,931 --> 00:10:39,390
Can you stop with
these landings?
223
00:10:41,308 --> 00:10:42,309
I'm sorry.
224
00:10:42,476 --> 00:10:45,146
I don't know, ever since I
put on that last 20 pounds...
225
00:10:45,312 --> 00:10:46,380
Whatever you say.
226
00:10:46,631 --> 00:10:47,731
(SIGHS)
227
00:10:47,975 --> 00:10:49,055
Look at them.
228
00:10:49,434 --> 00:10:50,668
Please, just look at them.
229
00:10:50,809 --> 00:10:52,293
This whole trip is
great, you know?
230
00:10:52,459 --> 00:10:54,190
'Cause now I know
what it would be like
231
00:10:54,340 --> 00:10:55,832
if my family never had me.
232
00:10:56,624 --> 00:10:58,101
They'd be a
hundred times better.
233
00:10:58,268 --> 00:10:59,560
Thank you, booby!
234
00:11:00,310 --> 00:11:01,646
It's bubbie.
235
00:11:01,813 --> 00:11:02,814
Whatever.
236
00:11:02,981 --> 00:11:03,982
(SIGHS)
237
00:11:04,406 --> 00:11:07,185
This has not been my
best magical journey.
238
00:11:09,637 --> 00:11:11,981
Hey, Mom, Dad I'm gonna
be up in my room studying
239
00:11:12,148 --> 00:11:13,274
and don't come in.
240
00:11:13,383 --> 00:11:15,183
LOUIS: I just wanted
to say something about...
241
00:11:15,317 --> 00:11:17,310
- REN: If anyone cares.
- Um, I'm really sorry.
242
00:11:19,140 --> 00:11:20,740
Ren, I have to talk to you.
243
00:11:20,839 --> 00:11:22,709
Ren, can you please...
just a second, Ren.
244
00:11:51,553 --> 00:11:53,642
- (ROCK AND ROLL PLAYING)
- (SCOFFS)
245
00:11:53,729 --> 00:11:55,529
Can I just... Can
I just talk to you
246
00:11:55,654 --> 00:11:57,285
about the whole
present thing, Ren?
247
00:11:57,452 --> 00:12:00,280
Ren, come on, I'm
trying to talk to you.
248
00:12:05,336 --> 00:12:06,961
Who's the airhead now, huh?
249
00:12:08,246 --> 00:12:09,312
(MOTORBIKE REVVING)
250
00:12:09,531 --> 00:12:11,583
Okay, well... I'm going
to say it, anyways.
251
00:12:11,750 --> 00:12:13,468
- Ren, um...
- Hey, Spider,
252
00:12:13,692 --> 00:12:16,043
you're a disgusting dirt bag!
253
00:12:16,555 --> 00:12:17,832
(GIGGLING)
254
00:12:17,932 --> 00:12:19,307
I'll be right out.
255
00:12:20,016 --> 00:12:22,403
My man is so hot!
256
00:12:23,036 --> 00:12:24,729
Ren's a wild chick.
257
00:12:25,601 --> 00:12:26,602
Ren?
258
00:12:26,769 --> 00:12:28,758
(SIGHS) Not now, Donnie.
259
00:12:28,925 --> 00:12:30,243
What is it?
260
00:12:30,410 --> 00:12:31,844
I'm getting that feeling again.
261
00:12:32,011 --> 00:12:33,813
Just wait a second, okay?
262
00:12:34,729 --> 00:12:37,258
Spider, I can't
come out tonight.
263
00:12:37,992 --> 00:12:39,627
I got stuff to do.
264
00:12:40,026 --> 00:12:41,255
Bye. (KISSING)
265
00:12:41,422 --> 00:12:42,464
I'll call you.
266
00:12:42,631 --> 00:12:43,848
Ren, hurry.
267
00:12:44,015 --> 00:12:46,876
My tummy has... a headache.
268
00:12:49,461 --> 00:12:50,813
Donnie, it's okay.
269
00:12:50,980 --> 00:12:52,138
No, it's not, Ren.
270
00:12:52,565 --> 00:12:53,756
Everything Curtis does
271
00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:56,678
is right, and I'm just a loser.
272
00:12:56,845 --> 00:12:58,429
No, you are not.
273
00:12:58,595 --> 00:13:00,531
Look, it says right
here on this little trophy:
274
00:13:00,698 --> 00:13:02,256
"Winner, First
Grade Spelling Bee."
275
00:13:02,392 --> 00:13:03,424
- See?
- What?
276
00:13:03,494 --> 00:13:05,563
It's the only thing I've
ever won in my life.
277
00:13:05,705 --> 00:13:06,854
Aw, Let me hear it.
278
00:13:08,029 --> 00:13:11,181
Ride: R-i-d, silent "e."
279
00:13:11,348 --> 00:13:13,392
See? You still got it.
280
00:13:13,559 --> 00:13:15,060
(LAUGHING)
281
00:13:15,227 --> 00:13:16,697
Donnie's a total wuss.
282
00:13:21,302 --> 00:13:24,671
Didn't I tell you I need total
quiet when I'm studying?
283
00:13:24,838 --> 00:13:25,839
Curtis, I'm sorry.
284
00:13:26,006 --> 00:13:27,873
It's just you're
always studying.
285
00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:30,603
Then you should always be quiet!
286
00:13:30,794 --> 00:13:33,124
Hey, don't talk
to her like that.
287
00:13:33,314 --> 00:13:36,142
Oh, what are you going
to do, spelling champ?
288
00:13:39,285 --> 00:13:42,121
R-i-d, silent "e."
R-i-d, silent "e."
289
00:13:42,288 --> 00:13:44,233
Can you just leave
him alone, Curtis?
290
00:13:44,400 --> 00:13:45,526
You know,
291
00:13:45,692 --> 00:13:48,846
I am getting so tired
of the two of you.
292
00:13:55,552 --> 00:13:56,553
Who's he?
293
00:13:56,667 --> 00:13:58,587
You know you're not
supposed to have friends over
294
00:13:58,692 --> 00:13:59,731
when I'm studying.
295
00:13:59,897 --> 00:14:01,767
Now, I want him
out of here, now.
296
00:14:04,861 --> 00:14:05,872
So, what are you?
297
00:14:06,039 --> 00:14:07,297
One of Donnie's little friends?
298
00:14:07,908 --> 00:14:09,208
I don't have any friends.
299
00:14:09,375 --> 00:14:11,886
- I'm talking to you, twerp.
- LOUIS: No, this...
300
00:14:12,053 --> 00:14:13,930
no, uh, I'm... you can't see me.
301
00:14:14,347 --> 00:14:16,082
Well, what am I
looking at, then?
302
00:14:17,381 --> 00:14:19,644
I don't know. This is weird.
303
00:14:19,811 --> 00:14:21,019
I'm invisible.
304
00:14:21,185 --> 00:14:22,562
It seems weird. I'm serious.
305
00:14:22,729 --> 00:14:24,355
Look, I'll prove it to you.
306
00:14:24,522 --> 00:14:26,867
I'll... look... just... you're
going to be amazed.
307
00:14:27,034 --> 00:14:28,427
Oh!
308
00:14:33,248 --> 00:14:35,876
Okay, who are you and
where did you come from?
309
00:14:36,337 --> 00:14:40,106
I'm Louis Steve-o-saurus.
310
00:14:40,657 --> 00:14:42,975
And, I'm a foreign
exchange student
311
00:14:43,192 --> 00:14:44,735
from Pennsylvania.
312
00:14:44,902 --> 00:14:46,954
CURTIS: I hear voices!
313
00:14:47,121 --> 00:14:49,108
Um... Sorry, Curtis!
314
00:14:49,314 --> 00:14:50,608
Your little brother's a creep.
315
00:14:51,158 --> 00:14:52,314
Gee...
316
00:14:53,711 --> 00:14:54,954
you noticed?
317
00:14:56,104 --> 00:14:58,264
You don't know what it's
like being related to somebody
318
00:14:58,404 --> 00:15:00,918
who's perfect at
everything they do.
319
00:15:01,410 --> 00:15:04,421
Actually... I do.
320
00:15:04,588 --> 00:15:05,589
- Really?
- Yeah.
321
00:15:05,756 --> 00:15:07,224
How do you deal with it?
322
00:15:07,391 --> 00:15:10,061
Well, it's hard, but I
think you got to focus
323
00:15:10,228 --> 00:15:11,761
on your own good
qualities, you know?
324
00:15:12,132 --> 00:15:13,307
We don't have any.
325
00:15:13,473 --> 00:15:14,474
DONNIE: Ride.
326
00:15:14,641 --> 00:15:16,000
R-i-d, silent "e." Ride.
327
00:15:16,167 --> 00:15:18,275
- See, that's good.
- That's... yeah.
328
00:15:18,441 --> 00:15:20,471
I can spit really far.
329
00:15:20,638 --> 00:15:21,639
Whoa.
330
00:15:21,806 --> 00:15:23,086
- REN: Yeah, just like...
- Yeah.
331
00:15:23,206 --> 00:15:25,526
And the fact that you guys
care so much about each other,
332
00:15:25,693 --> 00:15:27,195
you know, that's good, too.
333
00:15:27,944 --> 00:15:30,589
I mean, I wish my brother
and sister cared about me
334
00:15:30,756 --> 00:15:32,641
as much as you guys
care about each other.
335
00:15:35,641 --> 00:15:38,447
Hey, Mom, can I
have a friend... Shh!
336
00:15:39,173 --> 00:15:41,742
You know Curtis doesn't
like noise when he's studying.
337
00:15:42,210 --> 00:15:44,745
So, does that mean he not
going to help us make dinner, huh?
338
00:15:44,912 --> 00:15:49,000
Ren, Curtis is the
pride of this family.
339
00:15:49,400 --> 00:15:51,810
He's the smartest
the most talented...
340
00:15:51,977 --> 00:15:53,913
I'll get my... my trophy.
341
00:15:54,080 --> 00:15:56,690
No, no, no. If Curtis
don't help, we don't help.
342
00:15:56,915 --> 00:15:58,065
Well, very nice.
343
00:15:58,234 --> 00:16:00,169
How would it be if
I took that attitude
344
00:16:00,319 --> 00:16:02,272
and decided not to
cook Hanukkah dinner?
345
00:16:02,439 --> 00:16:03,440
Well, I'll tell you.
346
00:16:03,606 --> 00:16:05,525
There would be one
little boy named Curtis
347
00:16:05,692 --> 00:16:07,012
who would be
mighty disappointed.
348
00:16:07,176 --> 00:16:10,596
Curtis, Curtis, Curtis! I am so
sick about hearing this name.
349
00:16:10,763 --> 00:16:11,764
Hi, there.
350
00:16:13,007 --> 00:16:14,466
Who-who's that?
351
00:16:15,691 --> 00:16:18,788
Mom, Dad, this is
Louis Steve-o-saurus.
352
00:16:19,338 --> 00:16:22,934
He's a foreign exchange student
and I want him to come to dinner.
353
00:16:23,101 --> 00:16:24,102
Hi.
354
00:16:24,268 --> 00:16:25,503
How... how do you do?
355
00:16:25,670 --> 00:16:27,113
- Louis. Yeah.
- Louis.
356
00:16:27,280 --> 00:16:28,980
Well, we would
love to invite you
357
00:16:29,147 --> 00:16:30,608
for Hanukkah dinner, Louis
358
00:16:30,775 --> 00:16:32,983
but isn't your own family
expecting you back?
359
00:16:33,150 --> 00:16:34,378
No. I don't have a family.
360
00:16:34,544 --> 00:16:35,613
(ALL GROAN)
361
00:16:35,780 --> 00:16:37,805
I mean, I have a
family, it's just...
362
00:16:37,972 --> 00:16:40,599
we don't celebrate... dinner.
363
00:16:40,766 --> 00:16:42,695
You mind if I help you
with something, hmm?
364
00:16:43,585 --> 00:16:46,205
Well, I was just about to
put this chicken in the oven.
365
00:16:46,372 --> 00:16:48,040
- I got it.
- Oh.
366
00:16:48,207 --> 00:16:49,410
(BOTH GASP)
367
00:16:53,379 --> 00:16:56,460
(HESITANT CHUCKLING)
368
00:16:59,802 --> 00:17:00,803
(LAUGHING)
369
00:17:00,970 --> 00:17:03,082
- The chicken!
- I'll take it. I'll take it.
370
00:17:03,699 --> 00:17:06,410
Oh! Oh!
371
00:17:07,527 --> 00:17:09,130
Look, it's freestyle.
372
00:17:09,697 --> 00:17:12,942
Oh... freestyle chicken.
373
00:17:13,099 --> 00:17:14,402
(ALL LAUGHING)
374
00:17:14,677 --> 00:17:16,002
Oh...
375
00:17:17,043 --> 00:17:19,003
I'm eating you for Hanukkah.
376
00:17:19,170 --> 00:17:22,218
I think I'll do a dance.
377
00:17:22,590 --> 00:17:25,555
We haven't laughed
this hard since... never.
378
00:17:25,721 --> 00:17:27,699
(ALL LAUGHING)
379
00:17:27,866 --> 00:17:30,285
- Yeah, I wish you were my brother.
- That'd be cool.
380
00:17:34,439 --> 00:17:36,742
Hey, where'd the chicken
go? It was here a minute ago.
381
00:17:36,909 --> 00:17:38,593
It's on your head.
382
00:17:38,760 --> 00:17:40,470
Chicken train, here it comes.
383
00:17:40,637 --> 00:17:42,004
Come on. Come on. Come on.
384
00:17:42,171 --> 00:17:50,171
Chicka-chicka-chicka
Chicka-chicka-chicka.
385
00:18:02,316 --> 00:18:05,068
Chicka-chicka-chicka... People!
386
00:18:05,479 --> 00:18:07,129
We have a problem.
387
00:18:07,295 --> 00:18:08,405
What is it, son?
388
00:18:08,705 --> 00:18:12,059
Someone has pilfered
the Hanukkah money.
389
00:18:12,226 --> 00:18:13,659
Yeah!
390
00:18:13,826 --> 00:18:16,547
That means it's
stolen, pebble-brain.
391
00:18:18,206 --> 00:18:19,207
Come on.
392
00:18:19,333 --> 00:18:20,927
R-i-d, silent "e."
R-i-d, silent "e."
393
00:18:21,052 --> 00:18:22,585
R-i-d, silent "e."
394
00:18:22,752 --> 00:18:23,753
R-i-d...
395
00:18:26,976 --> 00:18:28,351
I know I put it in here.
396
00:18:28,551 --> 00:18:30,551
Keep looking. It's got to
be around here somewhere.
397
00:18:30,710 --> 00:18:31,711
It's not.
398
00:18:31,878 --> 00:18:33,713
Here, Dad, let me check again.
399
00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:35,090
Oops.
400
00:18:35,257 --> 00:18:36,258
- Oh...
- (GASPS)
401
00:18:36,424 --> 00:18:37,968
It's that foreign kid.
402
00:18:38,134 --> 00:18:39,603
He's a bad man, Mom.
403
00:18:47,394 --> 00:18:48,587
Hey.
404
00:18:51,737 --> 00:18:53,409
Where'd you say you were from?
405
00:18:54,284 --> 00:18:55,661
Pennsylvania.
406
00:18:56,786 --> 00:18:57,996
Albania.
407
00:18:58,605 --> 00:19:00,325
It's a small town near...
408
00:19:01,434 --> 00:19:02,810
Romania.
409
00:19:02,960 --> 00:19:06,739
And what was this
doing in your pocket?
410
00:19:07,423 --> 00:19:09,041
Is that why you came here,
411
00:19:09,208 --> 00:19:10,501
to steal our presents?
412
00:19:10,667 --> 00:19:12,512
No, I didn't want to
steal any presents.
413
00:19:12,687 --> 00:19:14,588
I just wanted to be with
you guys... my family.
414
00:19:14,755 --> 00:19:15,756
What?
415
00:19:15,923 --> 00:19:17,750
You come here and
dance with our chicken
416
00:19:17,917 --> 00:19:19,393
and suddenly you're family?
417
00:19:20,269 --> 00:19:21,520
I'm so scared.
418
00:19:22,512 --> 00:19:24,556
Should I call the police, Dad?
419
00:19:24,723 --> 00:19:26,893
- You know...
- Absolutely! Get him, Donnie!
420
00:19:27,060 --> 00:19:28,561
Okay, I didn't do anything.
421
00:19:28,728 --> 00:19:30,379
Yeah, 'cause we caught you.
422
00:19:30,546 --> 00:19:32,098
I actually thought
you were nice.
423
00:19:32,265 --> 00:19:33,357
I am nice.
424
00:19:33,523 --> 00:19:36,360
Just ask my great-great
grandmother Bubbie.
425
00:19:36,526 --> 00:19:37,527
Bubbie Rose.
426
00:19:37,694 --> 00:19:39,688
Bubbie Rose, can you
please come down?
427
00:19:39,855 --> 00:19:41,081
It's not funny anymore.
428
00:19:41,247 --> 00:19:42,983
I want to go home, please.
429
00:19:44,666 --> 00:19:45,883
I want to go home.
430
00:19:46,278 --> 00:19:49,506
There's no place like home.
431
00:19:51,081 --> 00:19:52,551
It worked in that one movie.
432
00:19:53,951 --> 00:19:58,749
(SCREAMING)
433
00:19:58,916 --> 00:19:59,917
No! No!
434
00:20:00,059 --> 00:20:02,419
- Son, you're having a bad dream.
- I didn't steal anything.
435
00:20:02,478 --> 00:20:03,771
- Son!
- Honey.
436
00:20:03,938 --> 00:20:05,618
- Calm down. You okay?
- You called me son.
437
00:20:05,648 --> 00:20:06,649
Yeah.
438
00:20:07,190 --> 00:20:08,309
Come on, buddy.
439
00:20:08,476 --> 00:20:10,386
It's time to light a
Hanukkah candle.
440
00:20:10,553 --> 00:20:12,953
Wait, you guys said that I'm
grounded for Hanukkah, remember?
441
00:20:13,072 --> 00:20:14,907
Hey, that's okay.
We all talked it over.
442
00:20:15,074 --> 00:20:17,367
We decided we're not going
to let a few broken presents
443
00:20:17,480 --> 00:20:18,693
- ruin the holiday. Right, guys?
- Yeah.
444
00:20:18,717 --> 00:20:21,597
You know, guys, I'm really sorry
about everything that went on, you know?
445
00:20:21,866 --> 00:20:23,073
- Mm-hmm.
- We know.
446
00:20:23,240 --> 00:20:25,993
Louis, you do a lot
of crazy things but...
447
00:20:26,344 --> 00:20:29,397
well, Hanukkah just wouldn't
be any fun without you around.
448
00:20:29,564 --> 00:20:30,724
- That's right.
- So, come on.
449
00:20:30,773 --> 00:20:32,173
Everybody up for
the chicken dance?
450
00:20:32,299 --> 00:20:33,300
- Hmm?
- What?
451
00:20:33,467 --> 00:20:35,219
The chick... Let's
go light the candles.
452
00:20:35,386 --> 00:20:36,679
- Come on.
- (REN LAUGHS)
453
00:20:36,894 --> 00:20:40,641
(SINGING PRAYER IN HEBREW)
454
00:20:57,674 --> 00:20:58,923
REN: Gimel. Gimel.
455
00:20:59,009 --> 00:21:00,968
STEVE, DONNIE AND LOUIS:
Nun! Nun! Nun! Nun! Nun!
456
00:21:01,212 --> 00:21:03,912
(ALL SHOUTING)
457
00:21:04,116 --> 00:21:05,274
Oh! Yeah!
458
00:21:05,441 --> 00:21:06,608
(ALL CHEERING)
459
00:21:06,775 --> 00:21:10,444
(WHOOPING AND LAUGHING)
460
00:21:10,611 --> 00:21:13,549
- Nobody likes a dreidel diva.
- (HANUKKAH MUSIC PLAYING)
461
00:21:14,672 --> 00:21:15,839
WOMAN: Yoo-hoo!
462
00:21:17,316 --> 00:21:20,606
You know, I was
just out for a little jog
463
00:21:20,773 --> 00:21:22,300
and I found these in the trash,
464
00:21:22,467 --> 00:21:23,600
and I thought
465
00:21:23,766 --> 00:21:25,727
maybe you threw
them out by mistake.
466
00:21:25,893 --> 00:21:27,144
No, it's no mistake.
467
00:21:27,311 --> 00:21:28,494
They're all broken.
468
00:21:28,661 --> 00:21:29,870
Really?
469
00:21:30,941 --> 00:21:32,314
(ALL GASP)
470
00:21:32,760 --> 00:21:35,779
Oh, Ren's gift,
it's in one piece.
471
00:21:35,946 --> 00:21:38,191
Donnie's sports
clock, it's not smashed.
472
00:21:38,341 --> 00:21:39,500
How did you...
473
00:21:41,484 --> 00:21:42,703
Where's that woman?
474
00:21:43,469 --> 00:21:45,189
REN: Well, that's strange.
475
00:21:56,841 --> 00:21:58,802
So, uh, how many
days till Christmas?
476
00:22:04,090 --> 00:22:07,302
(THEME MUSIC)