(THEME MUSIC PLAYS)
(ALARM RINGING)
(SPRING BOINGS)
(SLURPING)
(ELECTRIC WHIRRING)
(EXPLOSION)
And that, students, is the colorful history
- of the modern lawn rake. - (KNOCKING ON DOOR)
Come on in, Ren.
Class, Ren Stevens has an announcement to make.
Please give her your full attention.
Remember, we are ladies and gentlemen.
I'm going out to scarf a burrito.
- Back in five. - Okay.
Hello, students.
As this year's coordinator
for the school-wide fundraising drive
for the Beacon of Help,
I want to encourage each and every one of you to get involved.
As I look out upon my fellow students
I see your eager faces,
faces unafraid of sweat and hard work.
Do you want me to wake him?
He's my brother. Let me do it.
(SURF THEME MUSIC PLAYS)
(SQUAWKING)
Oh! Whoa. Whoa.
- (REN SQUAWKS) - (LOUIS GASPS)
I want names, and I'm not afraid to tango.
As I was saying, this Saturday I want all of you here
to jog, rollerblade, swim, paint fences,
do whatever you're good at doing
to get your friends and family to pledge generously.
Now, remember, the more you work,
the more they'll pledge.
Any questions?
Yeah, Louis, you can go back to sleep now.
Could you be any lazier?
You know, I don't know. I'll think about it, though.
You know, I'm thinking that I'll shooting baskets for charity.
I'll get people to donate a buck for every free throw I make.
Well, that's a cool idea.
Very cool, but what if you don't make any, man?
Please.
Bank.
- (LAUGHS) - Whoa.
- Hey, Tawny. - Hi.
ZACK: So, Louis, since when did you board?
Oh, since...
I don't know, since I was, like, uh, four.
- ZACK: Oh, really? - Yeah.
Well, can you do, like, a 50-50 grind?
Or a boneless nose slide?
No. See, 'cause I'm way over that whole trick thing, you know?
Yeah, you know, he's more into, like, backpack skitching.
Wh... whatever.
Well, see you later, Tawny.
- TAWNY: He's pretty good. - No, nah, he's trying way too hard.
Guys, check it out.
Oh, dude, I can't wait. Fun-tasia is gonna be so cool.
I heard that there's going to be, like, pizza
and tons of video games and stuff.
I heard they have virtual bowling.
And for virtual bowling you have to rent virtual bowling shoes.
I hate that virtual nasty smell.
It's almost like those virtual nachos.
They make you virtually bloated.
(LAUGHING)
Could you guys virtually stop now?
TAWNY: So, Louis,
do you want to do something together on Saturday?
Saturday?
- Cheese-like products? - Oh, please, fill 'er up.
Oh, yeah.
Mm.
(HORN HONKING)
Where... Where'd you guys go?
Louis, we have Ren's fundraiser.
What else would we do on Saturday?
Yeah, you're right, it's a fundraiser.
- So you want to wash cars? - Well, I don't know.
Dirty cars, hot sun, harsh detergent
- on my delicate skin... - Forget it.
Come on, Louis, you got to do something.
Yeah, I know, I know. I just...
(SIGHS) I got to find some way to take advantage
of my special talents, you know?
(THEME MUSIC FROM 2001: A Space Odyssey PLAYS)
Guys?
What if I found a way to help mankind
without even getting out of my pajamas?
(SIGHS)
(CHUCKLES)
EILEEN: Louis, let me get this straight.
Starting tomorrow for the next 48 hours
you will be in a store window lying in a bed?
Well, uh, number one, it's not just a bed.
It's The Compu-Rest 3000
and it's the world's smartest bed.
And two, I won't just be lying there.
I'll be dozing for dollars.
Hello? Am I the only one who sees this is a cheap scam to get out of work?
Everyone else is gonna be jogging or biking,
and my brother's going to be napping for the needy?
"Napping for the Needy."
That's awesome. "Napping for the Needy."
It rolls off the tongue. It's even better
- than "Dozing for Dollars." - (SCOFFS)
Oh, wow, wow. That is a TV.
- It is indeed. - Oh, yes.
- Is that a DVD player? - Oh, yes, it is. Uh-huh.
Oh, you got The Water Boy.
SALES CLERK: Plus, an intercom system.
Hiya, folks. How you doing? (LAUGHS)
For the next 48 hours, I want you to be
- as comfortable as possible. - Okay.
So follow the bouncing salesman. We have three types of beverage
here in the fridge: cola, red pop and root beer.
Toaster oven, great for making French bread.
And, Louis, may I introduce to you
what may be the most versatile bed on our planet,
the Compu-Rest 3000.
- Can I ask you a personal question? - Yeah.
Do you get enough circulation in your feet when you sleep?
- You know, I could use more. - Done, son.
The Compu-Rest 3000 adjusts to 75 different positions,
has four Euro-style vibrating modes,
a lumbar sensitive, temperature controlled mattress,
plus a swing-out cup holder.
Huh? Louis,
this bed was originally developed, I heard, for NASA,
but it wouldn't fit inside the shuttle.
Mr. Chaney, I love this bed. You know I do.
And I hope that I'm worthy,
and hopefully, it'll bring you business for...
Uh-uh-uh. Luigi, this has nothing to do with business.
This is about charity.
- A good deed is its own reward. - Yes.
- (MIC FEEDBACK) - Come one! Come all!
Step right up to watch the amazing boy in the window.
Come on in for some fresh coffee. Couches half off.
Lou,
you may be the bravest young man that I've ever met.
- No. - Yes.
(APPLAUSE)
NEIL ARMSTRONG (OVER RADIO): That's one small step for man,
one giant leap for mankind.
Woo!
(APPLAUSE)
He waved to us. The Amazing Boy waved to us.
MAN: All right.
That's my son in there, lounging like a champ.
Hi, honey. We love you.
Just look at him lounging there.
He makes it look so easy.
Family, he's lying in a bed.
An untrained monkey could lie in a bed.
Not like Louis.
- Let's get this to Foto-Mat. - Good idea.
See you, Lou.
Channel Five News coming through. Excuse me. Pardon me, Miss.
Cynthia Mills here in front of Chaney's Bed City.
Today, throughout Sacramento
kids are involved in fundraising events.
But one special young man
has captured our hearts, our imagination.
I'm here to ask a few questions.
What is your name, sir?
Hi, Cyn. Hi. Can I call you "Cyn"?
- I'm Louis Stevens. - Louis.
How did you come up with the idea
to live and sleep in a window for two days?
I'd tell you it was a dream I had,
but that would give this whole thing a false magical quality, you know?
Louis, could you tell the public
a little about the charity you are napping for?
The charity? It's a great charity.
It's called, uh, Bacon of... Hoping for Bacon...
It's the Beacon of Help, Louis. It's on your T-shirt.
They've been aiding the underprivileged since 1961.
What is your name, Miss? And what is your affiliation
- with Sacramento's super kid... - LOUIS: My sister.
- Louis Stevens? - Well, I'm Ren Stevens.
I'm Louis's sister. (CHUCKLES) Yeah.
But more importantly, I'm the fundraising coordinator.
You are a very articulate young woman.
Would you grant us an interview?
- LOUIS: Yeah. - Me? Really? Well, sure.
What's there to say about me? Not much,
because before I was a coordinator I was just a class president,
- and then... - Fascinating. So...
what's it like being Louis' sister?
- (LOUIS IMITATES FARTING) - Is he always amazing?
- (GRUNTS) - He's never amazing.
Wait a minute. Wait a minute. I'm getting some very exciting news.
Ren, is it true
that when Louis rides in the back seat
he likes the window halfway down
so that it is breezy, but not too breezy?
Lady! It's a kid in a bed! Am I the only one who's not crazy?
- Hey! The Amazing Boy's doing tricks. - (APPLAUSE)
(MOUTHING WORDS)
(CHEERING)
Hey, look. It's a dog on a skateboard.
Now, that's really amazing.
Hey, Louis.
Hey. Twitty, let me show you something.
If I put a raisin...
If I put a raisin right here on my chin, and I do this...
it'll go down to my bellybutton.
Sounds cool, but I got to get over to Fun-tasia, so, uh...
Fun-tasia?
Yeah. The owner's opening it for a special preview.
They're inviting everybody that did the fundraiser.
We're talking free video games.
I never thought that I'd actually say that sentence.
- Well, I'm so there, man. - Whoa, dude.
Aren't you supposed to stay in bed for two days?
Dude, we're talking Fun-tasia here, virtual bowling.
I can stay here next week.
Hey, sport. How you doing?
Honey, we all saw you on TV, and we're all so proud of you.
Uh, Louis, do you think you could just fix your hair
a little bit before the next telecast?
STEVE: Your commitment has inspired everyone.
Your mom and I are helping out at a soup kitchen tomorrow morning.
And I'm donating my ankle weights
to less fortunate skinny-legged kids.
Honey, if we're going to get up at 5:00 in the morning
we shouldn't stay at Fun-tasia
- too long. - Hmm.
What? Wait a minute. You're going to Fun-tasia, too?
Yeah. I can't wait to try that motorcycle racing game.
In fact, my secret fantasy's always been
to peel out on a big, shiny hog.
(IMITATING REVVING) Ha-ha! See ya, Lou.
You know Louis, this whole bed thing is really working out.
You should think about doing it for the next few years.
Hey, Louis. How's it going?
Oh, hey, Tawny. Let me guess. You're on your way to Fun-tasia, right?
Yeah. I'm not really into video games,
but after washing cars all day, I sure could use a free sundae.
Free sundaes?
I mean, uh, so how was washing cars?
Not bad, actually. Zack helped me.
Zack? So you spent the whole day with Zack?
Yeah. We ended up having a cool time together.
(MALE SINGER SINGING)
It's me for you.
And you for me.
We'll be together.
For all eternity...
- (RECORD SCRATCHING) - ZACK: Hey, I picked us up
some jerky sticks to eat on the way over to Fun-tasia.
I bit the top off the wrapper
so it'd be easier for you to open.
So, Louis, did Tawny tell you we washed 25 cars today?
Oh, no. No, she didn't.
Did you happen to catch the six o'clock news?
Oh, actually I did.
They had this roller-skating dog on. He totally rocked.
Well, come on, Tawny, we'd better get to Fun-tasia.
Um, see ya, Louis. Have a nice nap.
Bye.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah! Mwah!
- (BOTH YELLING) - You are an animal!
Oh!
(LAUGHS)
- Yeah! - (INAUDIBLE)
Whoa!
LOUIS: Look, it kind of bites.
I really shouldn't be talking to you about my problems.
It's just that everyone's at Fun-tasia,
and I'm stuck here in a glass box.
I can't believe Tawny is with Zack. Hmm!
I've seen the guy in gym class.
Thinks he's a big shot.
Because he showers and wears deodorant.
Tawny's so cool.
But sometimes I wonder if she really gets me.
You get me, right?
Hey! I'm talking to you!
I'm talking to you!
(LOUD WHIRRING)
Stupid bed!
(WHIRRING STOPS)
Cynthia Mills here live at Fun-tasia
at what Sacramento-oids... Sacramentoids...
People from Sacramento are calling the bash
- of the new millennium. - What's up, Sacramento?
Just listen to these kids having fun.
I know what this reporter will be doing
when her shift is over. (SHRIEKS)
- (DANCE MUSIC PLAYING) - (CHEERING)
ALL: Hi!
CYNTHIA: Back to you, Hal.
Now, this would be an awesome place
for my band to kick off its world tour.
You know, and maybe I could get Santana to open for me.
(PHONE RINGING)
Hey, Alan, your whipped cream, it's ringing.
Talk to me.
Zack and Tawny are having way too much fun.
You've got to split them up, okay?
Who is this?
It's Louis.
Oh, hey, are you still in the window?
I'm still in the window.
And you can hear the music?
No, I saw you guys on TV.
Really? So how'd I look?
(LOUD WHIRRING)
Knock it off! I'm warning you!
Sorry, man, I just asked.
Ew.
Hi, Louis.
I just wanted to apologize for criticizing you.
I first thought that you just wanted to get off easy,
but now I realize that while everyone
is having a ton of fun here, you're sticking to your commitment
in that tiny cramped window.
Oh, I got to go.
They're bringing out cheese sticks that are, like, a foot long. Bye.
That was Ren.
I kind of figured that out.
Can I talk to Tawny?
All right.
Hey, Tawny, Louis wants to talk to you.
Sorry, it's kind of sticky.
Hey, sleepyhead.
Oh, hey, Tawny. Um, listen, it's Louis.
(CHEERING)
I made a really stupid mistake today.
I should've come with you and washed cars.
Instead I took the easy way out and...
I bet it would've been a lot of fun to hang out, you know.
You and me... together?
Oh, Louis, I didn't hear a word you said.
Zack won more tokens so I got to go. Bye.
No, wait...
(PANTING)
That's it. Forget commitment.
I'm done, through! You can eat my sheets, bed!
- Eat my... Ow! - (LOUD WHIRRING)
Get it off!
(GROANING)
(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)
- BOTH: Oh! - (INDISTINCT CONVERSATION)
ZACK: You ready?
(FOOTSTEPS)
Oh! Zack? Zack?
They just announced you won a raffle in the parking lot.
- I didn't buy a raffle ticket. - I uh, I bought one for you.
I mean, what are friends for, right?
- Thanks, man. - Go, man, come on, run.
- (LOUD WHIRRING) - (LOUIS GROANING)
(GRUNTING)
Hmm.
You know, the gunk's getting a little crusty around the corners.
(GRUNTING)
TAWNY: Right now. Whatever. Oh, whoa.
- (LAUGHS) - Hey, thanks, man.
Great prize, 20 bucks.
- No way. - Yeah.
They're giving them out in the parking lot. Go! Run!
Had to get rid of that guy.
I may not be quick, but I'm vengeful.
(GROANS)
(WHIRRING)
(YELLING)
No! What are you doing?
Why?
(SCREAMS)
So, like, what do you want to do next?
Ready for some virtual bowling?
Well, that depends.
Does that mean we're going to have to rent virtual bowling shoes?
Wait a second.
If we're virtual bowling
then why would you need shoes?
(CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY) That's... That's the joke part.
- The bowling or the shoes? - The whole thing.
Oh. Good one. (FORCED LAUGH)
(INAUDIBLE)
(SIGHS)
Let go of me, you devil bed!
(GROANS)
(ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYS)
Are you okay?
I can hear you screaming through the intercom.
What are you doing here?
Oh, just thought I'd come out and watch a little mattress rodeo.
That's cool. So, uh...
why aren't you with Zack?
Zack's okay, but he doesn't laugh at the stupid stuff
like we do.
Oh, you mean like the bad dubbing in karate movies?
(DEEP VOICE) I'm here
to avenge my brother. (MOUTHING SENTENCE)
- Now... - (LAUGHING)
You'll feel the wrath, infidel. (MOUTHING SENTENCE)
Or how about the way Mrs. Wolf always spits when she says,
(SPLUTTERING) "Photosynthesis."
"Sorry, kids, did I get you there?"
(LAUGHING)
So you're really going to stick this out?
Well, yeah. I mean, I came this far.
That's pretty cool, Louis.
Besides, I really think I've got the hang of it now.
(GRUNTS) Let's see here...
Oh, jeez... Down, bed!
- No! - (LAUGHS)
Oh, swish, baby! Nothing but air!
That's right, money, money. Who's the man, who the man.
DOG: You the man! (BARKS)
You got that right. It's the Don-amatic.
Yeah! (IMITATES MARTIAL ARTS YELL)
Oh!