1 00:00:01,584 --> 00:00:03,128 你發生什麼事了? 2 00:00:03,128 --> 00:00:05,130 因為你消失了四週 3 00:00:05,130 --> 00:00:06,673 我都能解釋 4 00:00:07,799 --> 00:00:12,137 我們用捲筒衛生紙捲完那個大熊雕像 然後你離開後 5 00:00:12,137 --> 00:00:16,307 牛魔王就搶走了我的金箍棒 6 00:00:16,307 --> 00:00:19,811 他打算要叛變,推翻玉皇大帝 7 00:00:19,811 --> 00:00:23,273 於是我和我爸回家幾個小時 8 00:00:23,273 --> 00:00:25,775 不過在凡間好像過了更久 9 00:00:25,775 --> 00:00:27,527 但沒關係 10 00:00:27,527 --> 00:00:31,406 我回來了,我要繼續找第四卷卷軸 11 00:00:33,283 --> 00:00:34,659 好,真難消化 12 00:00:34,659 --> 00:00:38,246 對,還有我的阿姨觀音買了新手機給我 13 00:00:39,122 --> 00:00:40,206 很酷吧? 14 00:00:40,832 --> 00:00:44,502 《西遊ABC》 15 00:00:44,502 --> 00:00:47,213 你好,你沒說你邀新朋友來家裡玩 16 00:00:48,548 --> 00:00:49,841 阿姨妳好,我叫孫維辰 17 00:00:49,841 --> 00:00:51,760 你是進的同學嗎? 18 00:00:51,760 --> 00:00:54,095 對,我和我阿姨最近搬到這裡 19 00:00:54,888 --> 00:00:56,306 阿姨,我很喜歡你們家耶,你們家很漂亮 20 00:00:56,306 --> 00:00:57,390 沒有 21 00:00:57,390 --> 00:00:59,225 還有妳的玉墜也很漂亮 22 00:00:59,225 --> 00:01:00,810 這個真的是很特別的耶 23 00:01:01,311 --> 00:01:02,645 我帶你去看對墜 24 00:01:02,645 --> 00:01:05,023 還有一個搭配的對墜 25 00:01:05,732 --> 00:01:07,442 這兩個玉墜是一對的 26 00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:10,779 這是綠玉,這是橙玉 27 00:01:10,779 --> 00:01:14,365 -相當古老,非常少見 -很特別 28 00:01:15,283 --> 00:01:16,910 你有空跟進進多講中文啊 29 00:01:17,535 --> 00:01:19,621 他的中文真的很爛耶 30 00:01:19,621 --> 00:01:20,663 好,好 31 00:01:21,539 --> 00:01:23,625 好,我們走吧 32 00:01:23,625 --> 00:01:24,834 我泡茶給你們喝,好嗎? 33 00:01:24,834 --> 00:01:26,920 我不用,我們都不用,謝謝妳 34 00:01:28,546 --> 00:01:31,299 天啊,看看這些玩具 35 00:01:32,759 --> 00:01:34,385 虎蓮在這裡有許多朋友 36 00:01:34,385 --> 00:01:37,806 話說,你還在找第四卷卷軸嗎? 37 00:01:37,806 --> 00:01:41,684 對,我爸說有個禪師也許能幫我 38 00:01:42,477 --> 00:01:44,979 他叫做濟公,又名濟癲和尚 39 00:01:45,563 --> 00:01:48,108 他遭天界貶入人間,現在在凡間生活 40 00:01:48,817 --> 00:01:51,444 好,好像很有機會喔 41 00:01:51,444 --> 00:01:52,445 對 42 00:01:53,446 --> 00:01:55,031 進,你會變魔術喔? 43 00:01:55,031 --> 00:01:57,283 對,不過那不是真的魔術,不像你那樣 44 00:01:57,283 --> 00:02:00,078 只是我十二歲在網路上買的蠢東西 45 00:02:00,620 --> 00:02:01,621 變給我看 46 00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:04,999 好,但我很久沒變了 47 00:02:04,999 --> 00:02:07,669 可能不太精彩 48 00:02:07,669 --> 00:02:09,420 -好 -但是... 49 00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:12,132 我找找,就這個 50 00:02:14,467 --> 00:02:15,552 -準備好了嗎? -好了 51 00:02:15,552 --> 00:02:17,303 然後... 52 00:02:18,263 --> 00:02:20,306 天靈靈地靈靈 53 00:02:20,306 --> 00:02:21,558 -什麼? -沒錯 54 00:02:21,558 --> 00:02:22,892 然後...準備好了嗎? 55 00:02:27,355 --> 00:02:29,232 等等,你是怎麼做到的?好厲害 56 00:02:29,899 --> 00:02:31,109 這是魔術,真正的魔術 57 00:02:32,569 --> 00:02:33,820 但這是熱狗 58 00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:35,822 也是手電筒,這不是魔術 59 00:02:36,531 --> 00:02:37,740 好 60 00:02:37,740 --> 00:02:40,493 我之後再來學這個香腸男的魔術 61 00:02:41,411 --> 00:02:42,579 我們應該去見見那位和尚 62 00:02:43,079 --> 00:02:45,290 好,不過,我不確定耶 63 00:02:45,290 --> 00:02:48,334 如果你找到那位博學多聞的和尚 64 00:02:48,334 --> 00:02:49,961 你真的還需要我嗎? 65 00:02:49,961 --> 00:02:51,546 你不想幫我嗎? 66 00:02:51,546 --> 00:02:54,048 沒有,只是...我不知道 67 00:02:54,048 --> 00:02:56,134 我不懂我為什麼能幫上忙 68 00:02:56,134 --> 00:02:58,928 再說,我還得做生物的小組作業 69 00:02:58,928 --> 00:03:02,974 拜託,進,你是我的引路人 我從我的夢得知的 70 00:03:04,642 --> 00:03:06,936 好,好吧,那走吧 71 00:03:06,936 --> 00:03:08,313 不過 72 00:03:08,313 --> 00:03:11,065 能想個比「引路人」更酷的說法嗎? 73 00:03:11,065 --> 00:03:12,400 僕人? 74 00:03:12,901 --> 00:03:14,611 好吧,你說得對,引路人比較好 75 00:03:18,281 --> 00:03:22,118 你確定是這裡嗎?這裡看起來是小型商場 76 00:03:22,118 --> 00:03:23,745 上面寫「廟」 77 00:03:24,287 --> 00:03:25,705 快,我們走吧 78 00:03:33,504 --> 00:03:36,507 這裡似乎沒什麼人 79 00:03:39,552 --> 00:03:41,846 -會不會是他? -我不知道 80 00:03:49,729 --> 00:03:51,022 你是濟公嗎? 81 00:03:51,606 --> 00:03:52,607 我是賴瑞 82 00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:54,275 去吧檯那裡找找 83 00:03:58,446 --> 00:03:59,447 你好 84 00:03:59,447 --> 00:04:02,575 七桌需要補餐巾紙 85 00:04:03,159 --> 00:04:05,203 我覺得他醉了 86 00:04:05,787 --> 00:04:06,913 你為什麼會這麼說? 87 00:04:06,913 --> 00:04:09,624 看他一副酒醉樣 88 00:04:11,292 --> 00:04:12,126 你好? 89 00:04:12,126 --> 00:04:13,753 什麼事? 90 00:04:13,753 --> 00:04:18,007 嗨,我們要找名叫濟公的禪師 91 00:04:18,508 --> 00:04:20,969 濟公個鬼啊 92 00:04:21,678 --> 00:04:23,388 -快滾 -好 93 00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:25,890 這裡應該沒有神明 94 00:04:25,890 --> 00:04:28,518 看來我這個引路人不怎麼樣 95 00:04:33,398 --> 00:04:35,733 好,我現在要去做生物作業了 96 00:04:35,733 --> 00:04:37,110 好 97 00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:38,778 再說,你也有手機,對吧? 98 00:04:38,778 --> 00:04:41,197 如果有什麼發現,再傳訊息給我 99 00:04:41,197 --> 00:04:42,865 -好 -等等見 100 00:04:42,865 --> 00:04:45,034 你好像很期待要做生物作業 101 00:04:45,994 --> 00:04:48,997 對,不知道耶,我只是很愛生物吧 102 00:04:50,540 --> 00:04:52,083 -嗨 -嗨 103 00:04:52,083 --> 00:04:54,752 -請進 -謝謝 104 00:04:57,171 --> 00:04:58,798 -防守 -抱歉 105 00:04:58,798 --> 00:05:01,134 -不公平,你越線了 -什麼?什麼意思? 106 00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:03,052 你殺了我了 107 00:05:04,220 --> 00:05:06,723 好,放下你們的武器 真實世界的人要通過 108 00:05:06,723 --> 00:05:09,642 -艾蜜莉亞,拜託為我報仇 -抱歉 109 00:05:09,642 --> 00:05:11,144 -嗨,爸 -嗨 110 00:05:11,144 --> 00:05:13,771 -嗨,你應該就是進 -嗨,對 111 00:05:13,771 --> 00:05:16,482 對了,小蜜 我把氣泡水放在廚房裡的餐盤上 112 00:05:16,482 --> 00:05:19,444 -能幫我拿過來嗎? -好,我馬上回來 113 00:05:20,069 --> 00:05:22,322 很高興認識你們,泰勒先生和太太 114 00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:24,657 不,叫我瑪吉安就好 115 00:05:24,657 --> 00:05:26,909 對,我是丹尼斯,他是霍登 116 00:05:26,909 --> 00:05:28,911 嗨,掰了 117 00:05:28,911 --> 00:05:30,079 你拿走一整塊? 118 00:05:30,830 --> 00:05:33,916 抱歉,別拘束 119 00:05:33,916 --> 00:05:36,169 我準備了一些小點心 120 00:05:37,462 --> 00:05:38,463 非常感謝妳 121 00:05:38,463 --> 00:05:40,465 -是要沾... -沒錯 122 00:05:40,465 --> 00:05:43,217 -天啊,這是從餐廳買的嗎? -不是 123 00:05:43,217 --> 00:05:45,470 抱歉我沒時間準備更多 124 00:05:45,470 --> 00:05:48,139 我要籌備看屋活動,最近很忙 125 00:05:48,139 --> 00:05:49,474 這...我可以吃嗎? 126 00:05:49,474 --> 00:05:51,142 -請用 -真的很謝謝 127 00:05:53,519 --> 00:05:54,771 吃慢點 128 00:05:55,730 --> 00:05:58,358 抱歉,這乳酪真的很好吃 129 00:05:58,358 --> 00:05:59,442 謝謝你 130 00:06:58,209 --> 00:07:00,378 你是誰?在這裡幹嘛? 131 00:07:00,378 --> 00:07:02,255 我只是想找人 132 00:07:03,464 --> 00:07:04,966 你找不到的 133 00:07:05,466 --> 00:07:07,760 我沒說我要找誰 134 00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:12,390 這裡沒人,就連我都不在 135 00:07:12,390 --> 00:07:14,642 好,你...不要再靠過來了 136 00:07:14,642 --> 00:07:16,936 為什麼?你怕嗎? 137 00:07:16,936 --> 00:07:19,439 不是,是你滿嘴酒味,很臭 138 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:39,208 濟公? 139 00:07:55,516 --> 00:07:56,809 濟公 140 00:07:57,810 --> 00:07:59,687 你在裝酒鬼嗎? 141 00:08:01,689 --> 00:08:02,607 沒錯 142 00:08:02,607 --> 00:08:04,650 你告訴我,你到底是誰? 143 00:08:04,650 --> 00:08:06,319 我叫孫維辰 144 00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:08,613 我爸說,我們在找同一個東西 145 00:08:11,073 --> 00:08:12,366 第四卷卷軸? 146 00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:18,873 放棄吧,你在浪費時間 147 00:08:18,873 --> 00:08:20,082 為什麼? 148 00:08:22,919 --> 00:08:27,882 我跋涉了數百萬英里 最終來到這座愚蠢的城鎮 149 00:08:27,882 --> 00:08:30,301 這裡連好吃的披薩都買不到 150 00:08:30,301 --> 00:08:34,138 所以真的在這裡,白鶴也有跟你說話嗎? 151 00:08:34,138 --> 00:08:36,140 什麼?白鶴? 152 00:08:36,140 --> 00:08:38,768 -在夢裡告訴你 -沒有 153 00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:41,979 好,過來這裡 154 00:08:44,315 --> 00:08:45,316 我帶你看看 155 00:08:48,986 --> 00:08:49,987 快點 156 00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:54,867 才不是蠢白鶴,這是我辛辛苦苦查到的 157 00:08:55,576 --> 00:08:57,078 我調查很久 158 00:08:57,787 --> 00:09:00,373 看看這些畫,你看到了什麼? 159 00:09:01,999 --> 00:09:03,000 色彩繽紛 160 00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:06,504 「色彩繽紛」呢,不,你這白癡 161 00:09:06,504 --> 00:09:10,466 這是關乎第四卷卷軸的重要資訊 162 00:09:12,718 --> 00:09:14,262 -認真看,白癡 -好 163 00:09:14,262 --> 00:09:15,763 好吧,我來解釋 164 00:09:18,849 --> 00:09:23,604 很久以前,孫悟空帶領了一行人 前往西天取經 165 00:09:23,604 --> 00:09:24,981 最後他們有所頓悟 166 00:09:24,981 --> 00:09:28,734 並將經書的智慧抄寫至三卷卷軸上 167 00:09:28,734 --> 00:09:31,445 談及紀律、對談、哲理 168 00:09:31,445 --> 00:09:34,532 但許多人都不知道 169 00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:38,619 其實有蘊含力量真經的第四卷卷軸 170 00:09:40,454 --> 00:09:42,623 這讓其他卷軸顯得很蠢,對吧? 171 00:09:43,207 --> 00:09:47,086 總之,傳說提到佛祖摧毀了第四卷卷軸 172 00:09:47,086 --> 00:09:50,464 像在撒帕瑪森乳酪一樣 讓卷軸散落於凡間 173 00:09:50,464 --> 00:09:54,176 藉此分散絕對的力量 174 00:09:54,176 --> 00:09:56,262 我覺得這麼做有點誇張 175 00:09:59,557 --> 00:10:02,351 隨著時間過去,原本和睦相處的兩個家族 176 00:10:02,351 --> 00:10:05,187 漸漸執迷於找出所有碎片 177 00:10:05,187 --> 00:10:07,565 希望有朝一日能統一天下 178 00:10:07,565 --> 00:10:13,904 為求己利,結下恩怨 相互欺瞞,終引爭戰 179 00:10:14,530 --> 00:10:18,659 不知道你知不知道,但人類超愛戰爭 180 00:10:18,659 --> 00:10:20,745 老是打個不停 181 00:10:20,745 --> 00:10:24,081 因此佛祖昭告天下 182 00:10:24,665 --> 00:10:27,627 唯有交戰兩方和平相處之時 183 00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:30,588 經書的終極力量才會顯現 184 00:10:30,588 --> 00:10:35,384 因此,第四卷卷軸可能無所不在 能幻化為各種東西 185 00:10:36,218 --> 00:10:38,763 也許是石頭或雲朵 186 00:10:39,597 --> 00:10:40,806 或玉墜 187 00:10:40,806 --> 00:10:42,558 我說各種東西都有可能 188 00:10:42,558 --> 00:10:45,269 現在要怎樣? 在這裡列出各種可能的東西嗎? 189 00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:49,273 我得走了,好,謝謝,謝謝你 190 00:10:49,273 --> 00:10:50,858 等等,就這樣嗎? 191 00:10:50,858 --> 00:10:54,695 怎麼不稱讚一下我的畫 謝謝我告訴你這些資訊 192 00:10:55,404 --> 00:10:57,615 對,這些畫很美,對,謝謝你 193 00:10:57,615 --> 00:11:01,369 我一定會告訴我爸你幫了個大忙,謝謝你 194 00:11:03,871 --> 00:11:05,164 喂,你爸是誰? 195 00:11:05,164 --> 00:11:07,375 齊天大聖孫悟空 196 00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:14,423 好,「如何確認基礎代謝 197 00:11:14,423 --> 00:11:17,468 首先,將兩隻手指放在手腕上 數六秒心跳數 198 00:11:17,468 --> 00:11:20,721 然後乘上十,計算出靜止心率」 199 00:11:21,430 --> 00:11:22,515 好 200 00:11:26,310 --> 00:11:27,853 -準備好了嗎? -準備好了 201 00:11:28,521 --> 00:11:29,689 開始 202 00:11:32,358 --> 00:11:33,901 (維辰) 203 00:11:35,277 --> 00:11:36,404 停 204 00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:40,366 好,那我就是六十,你呢? 205 00:11:40,366 --> 00:11:42,660 我應該算錯了 206 00:11:42,660 --> 00:11:43,786 為什麼?你算出來是多少? 207 00:11:43,786 --> 00:11:45,496 大概一百多 208 00:11:45,496 --> 00:11:47,456 對,我應該再測一次 209 00:11:47,456 --> 00:11:49,625 也許是我父母害你壓力很大 210 00:11:49,625 --> 00:11:51,711 -他們就讓我壓力很大 -妳父母很棒 211 00:11:51,711 --> 00:11:53,713 感覺妳爸好像想要抱我 212 00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:54,839 的確是 213 00:11:55,631 --> 00:11:58,592 還好他沒有抱,因為我吃了很多乳酪 214 00:12:01,178 --> 00:12:02,555 抱歉,我得接電話 215 00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:04,724 -好,去吧 -我馬上回來 216 00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:07,893 小蜜,妳能幫我操作掃描機嗎? 217 00:12:07,893 --> 00:12:09,979 它一直發出嗶嗶聲 218 00:12:10,479 --> 00:12:13,065 -喂? -進,嗨,我有好消息 219 00:12:13,065 --> 00:12:15,860 老兄,我現在有點忙 220 00:12:15,860 --> 00:12:17,987 好,我只是想告訴你... 221 00:12:17,987 --> 00:12:20,781 像個正常人,傳訊息給我,再見 222 00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:23,033 好,再見 223 00:12:29,540 --> 00:12:30,916 進說他很快就回來了 224 00:12:30,916 --> 00:12:32,501 沒關係啊,你就等啊,來,來 225 00:12:33,461 --> 00:12:34,462 喝茶 226 00:12:35,463 --> 00:12:36,672 謝謝 227 00:12:43,053 --> 00:12:44,180 很好喝 228 00:12:44,180 --> 00:12:46,098 給你帶一罐回去給你阿姨喝 229 00:12:47,725 --> 00:12:48,726 謝謝 230 00:12:49,560 --> 00:12:50,394 很好看 231 00:12:52,104 --> 00:12:53,981 你這個小孩子不得了耶 232 00:12:53,981 --> 00:12:56,901 懂得欣賞我的茶,還懂得欣賞我的玉耶 233 00:12:56,901 --> 00:12:58,444 我可以再看一次嗎? 234 00:12:58,944 --> 00:13:01,030 可以啊,我去拿給你啊 235 00:13:01,030 --> 00:13:05,910 我跟你說喔,這塊橙色的玉 是王進他爸爸家裡的傳家之寶 236 00:13:07,328 --> 00:13:10,080 我身上戴的這塊,是我家裡的 237 00:13:10,831 --> 00:13:12,500 你看,你看 238 00:13:14,335 --> 00:13:17,421 -回來啦 -嗨 239 00:13:17,421 --> 00:13:18,464 叔叔好 240 00:13:19,048 --> 00:13:21,050 維辰,進的朋友 241 00:13:23,677 --> 00:13:25,471 好久沒有看到妳拿這塊玉啊 242 00:13:26,388 --> 00:13:28,057 叔叔,這塊玉很漂亮 243 00:13:30,017 --> 00:13:32,186 這兩塊玉現在是一對了 244 00:13:32,186 --> 00:13:36,190 它們已經在我們的家族裡面 傳了好幾代了 245 00:13:37,566 --> 00:13:41,153 知道嗎? 以前叔叔的家族跟我的家族有衝突 246 00:13:42,071 --> 00:13:43,989 關係不好,我們原本是來自不同地方的 247 00:13:45,449 --> 00:13:47,117 所以我們結婚的時候 248 00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:49,787 我請人把它們鑲在一起 249 00:13:50,496 --> 00:13:51,705 像這樣 250 00:13:56,377 --> 00:13:58,963 讓它代表我們成為一家人 251 00:14:02,675 --> 00:14:03,759 妳戴起來... 252 00:14:06,178 --> 00:14:07,221 還是很好看 253 00:14:11,725 --> 00:14:13,602 辦公室那邊怎麼樣,有沒有消息啊? 254 00:14:16,564 --> 00:14:18,774 還沒有,這個...好 255 00:14:19,483 --> 00:14:21,485 你們忙你們的主日學 256 00:14:23,571 --> 00:14:24,905 -叔叔再見 -好 257 00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:30,160 無藥可救 258 00:14:31,245 --> 00:14:34,957 {\an8}無藥可救 259 00:14:34,957 --> 00:14:37,334 佛萊迪?你在家嗎? 260 00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:42,006 我要來還你的「一號超辣醬」 261 00:14:42,006 --> 00:14:43,924 讓我吃了上二號 262 00:14:45,384 --> 00:14:46,677 在這裡,丹尼 263 00:14:48,679 --> 00:14:50,764 -哪裡? -這裡 264 00:14:55,644 --> 00:14:58,731 -你在哪? -就在這裡 265 00:15:08,157 --> 00:15:10,701 佛萊迪,你在牆裡幹嘛? 266 00:15:10,701 --> 00:15:13,329 我本來想要睡美容覺 267 00:15:14,371 --> 00:15:16,498 你知道可以把床拉下來吧? 268 00:15:16,498 --> 00:15:18,292 當然知道 269 00:15:18,292 --> 00:15:21,879 不然我每天晚上要怎麼上下床? 270 00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:25,049 這樣睡覺感覺很危險 271 00:15:25,716 --> 00:15:27,635 為什麼?能出什麼錯呢? 272 00:15:31,555 --> 00:15:32,556 晚安 273 00:15:33,223 --> 00:15:34,808 嗨,進 274 00:15:34,808 --> 00:15:38,520 抱歉,霍登看完電視老是忘記關 275 00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:40,022 沒關係 276 00:15:40,022 --> 00:15:42,149 你知道我們該看什麼嗎?艾蜜莉亞演戲 277 00:15:42,149 --> 00:15:43,776 錄影檔應該就在某處 278 00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:46,862 -不,我們真的不用... -別這樣,妳演得很好,小蜜 279 00:15:46,862 --> 00:15:48,072 -她很有天分 -媽 280 00:15:48,072 --> 00:15:49,740 不是因為她是我女兒,我才這樣說 281 00:15:49,740 --> 00:15:51,951 我們真的應該去念書了 282 00:15:51,951 --> 00:15:53,619 進,你想要看嗎? 283 00:15:54,828 --> 00:15:56,205 -好啊,有何不可? -好 284 00:15:57,873 --> 00:16:00,709 老實說,我應該去念書了 285 00:16:00,709 --> 00:16:03,295 雖然她是群演,但她有資格當主角 286 00:16:03,295 --> 00:16:04,463 對 287 00:16:06,548 --> 00:16:08,467 好,等等見,瑪吉安 288 00:16:08,467 --> 00:16:10,552 反正是錄影檔,隨時都能看 289 00:16:11,303 --> 00:16:13,931 如果主教導我們要誠實,那妳上禮拜 290 00:16:13,931 --> 00:16:16,100 去教會帶的點心一點也不新鮮 291 00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:18,727 不可能吧,我...我買的點心一定是新鮮的 292 00:16:18,727 --> 00:16:21,480 范姐說得對,我也感覺像吃剩的一樣 293 00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:23,232 我是去那邊的時候路上買的啊 294 00:16:23,232 --> 00:16:25,442 好啦,好啦 我們今天要討論的是《以弗所書》 295 00:16:25,442 --> 00:16:28,362 惟用愛心說誠實話,妳們認真一點喔 296 00:16:28,362 --> 00:16:30,906 我們就是認真的,就是在說誠實話,妳看 297 00:16:30,906 --> 00:16:32,908 那點心就是不新鮮 298 00:16:32,908 --> 00:16:35,035 好了啦 299 00:16:35,035 --> 00:16:36,870 反正,反正,我們說實話 300 00:16:36,870 --> 00:16:39,707 我只希望我的兒子也這麼乖 301 00:16:40,374 --> 00:16:43,585 人家維辰不光是好乖,還有... 302 00:16:43,585 --> 00:16:45,087 一表人才啊 303 00:16:45,087 --> 00:16:46,714 真的這麼帥 304 00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:49,925 誰啊? 305 00:16:53,137 --> 00:16:54,346 可能是我朋友 306 00:16:57,433 --> 00:16:58,475 有什麼事嗎? 307 00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:02,479 不好意思,打擾了,我在找我的姪子 308 00:17:02,479 --> 00:17:03,564 維辰 309 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:06,400 遠在天邊,近在眼前 310 00:17:08,610 --> 00:17:10,154 真的很抱歉 311 00:17:10,154 --> 00:17:12,031 不會,別擔心 312 00:17:15,617 --> 00:17:17,661 等等...妳為什麼要道歉? 313 00:17:18,996 --> 00:17:22,583 我媽有時候很煩 314 00:17:22,583 --> 00:17:25,836 不會,我...我其實覺得她人很好 315 00:17:26,336 --> 00:17:29,548 那是她最棒的特質 但她拿來做討人厭的事 316 00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:31,050 這是妳嗎? 317 00:17:32,926 --> 00:17:33,927 對 318 00:17:34,553 --> 00:17:35,554 好 319 00:17:36,638 --> 00:17:43,020 妳氣妳媽太常稱讚妳嗎? 320 00:17:50,110 --> 00:17:52,905 她覺得她是保持正向,但其實只是在假裝 321 00:17:54,531 --> 00:17:55,574 好 322 00:17:57,826 --> 00:17:59,870 我父母完全沒有這種問題 323 00:18:01,955 --> 00:18:04,708 例如今早我媽說我的耳垂形狀很怪 324 00:18:09,797 --> 00:18:12,883 說真的 我希望她有時候對我說一些嚴厲的話 325 00:18:12,883 --> 00:18:14,760 不要每次都粉飾太平 326 00:18:14,760 --> 00:18:15,969 我能理解 327 00:18:17,638 --> 00:18:20,182 來,評論一下我的青春痘 我知道你看得到 328 00:18:21,475 --> 00:18:24,561 -什麼? -我的青春痘,批評一下,但要說真話 329 00:18:28,315 --> 00:18:31,985 我覺得妳的青春痘很完美 330 00:18:35,197 --> 00:18:37,199 你好爛喔,知道嗎? 331 00:18:37,199 --> 00:18:40,744 你應該說看起來很像辣味糖果之類的 332 00:18:40,744 --> 00:18:41,829 辣味糖果? 333 00:18:41,829 --> 00:18:44,957 我該說妳的青春痘看起來像辣味糖果嗎? 看起來又不像 334 00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:48,961 進,親愛的,要不要一起吃墨西哥烤肉? 335 00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:54,133 -好啊,我很樂意 -好耶,好 336 00:18:55,342 --> 00:18:58,011 我應該打給我媽,說我要留下來 337 00:18:58,011 --> 00:18:59,388 好,去吧 338 00:19:03,809 --> 00:19:04,810 喂? 339 00:19:04,810 --> 00:19:07,729 媽,我還在做作業 340 00:19:07,729 --> 00:19:10,315 不知道我能不能在他們家吃晚餐? 341 00:19:11,066 --> 00:19:13,235 你的朋友維辰來作客 342 00:19:13,235 --> 00:19:15,112 -什麼? -對,還有他的叔叔 343 00:19:15,112 --> 00:19:19,783 他叔叔?等等,媽,維辰沒有叔叔 344 00:19:19,783 --> 00:19:23,704 他邀請大家去他的餐廳吃晚餐 345 00:19:23,704 --> 00:19:25,998 一起來吧,我把地址傳給你 346 00:19:25,998 --> 00:19:29,334 -他們人都很好,進 -等等...媽,那個人是誰? 347 00:19:29,334 --> 00:19:30,961 不要沒禮貌,好嗎? 348 00:19:30,961 --> 00:19:32,087 喂? 349 00:19:34,131 --> 00:19:36,258 -歡迎光臨 -我是來用餐的 350 00:19:36,258 --> 00:19:37,926 -請進 -謝謝 351 00:19:40,345 --> 00:19:43,432 我聽到音樂,卻沒聽到有人唱歌 352 00:19:49,146 --> 00:19:51,148 你們浪費掉最棒的一段 353 00:19:52,816 --> 00:19:53,984 你還好嗎? 354 00:19:56,236 --> 00:19:57,863 嗨...嗨 355 00:19:57,863 --> 00:19:59,907 蔡太太,劉太太,到妳們了,快來唱 356 00:20:04,786 --> 00:20:06,580 進,進 357 00:20:06,580 --> 00:20:11,210 -嗨 -我帥氣的寶貝兒子,進 358 00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:15,255 -媽,妳醉了嗎? -沒有,我才沒醉 359 00:20:15,255 --> 00:20:17,174 我和范太太一起喝了一瓶啤酒 360 00:20:17,174 --> 00:20:20,469 我也和自己...喝了一瓶 361 00:20:21,345 --> 00:20:22,804 你見過維辰的叔叔了嗎? 362 00:20:22,804 --> 00:20:24,473 公先生,公先生 363 00:20:24,473 --> 00:20:27,851 他是我兒子,我帥氣的兒子,進 364 00:20:28,477 --> 00:20:30,604 -你好,進 -嗨,我們之前見過 365 00:20:30,604 --> 00:20:32,564 -真的嗎?應該沒有吧 -真的,在那裡 366 00:20:32,564 --> 00:20:34,149 -我沒去過那裡 -好 367 00:20:34,149 --> 00:20:36,735 歡迎來到我的餐廳,吃點東西啊 368 00:20:37,861 --> 00:20:39,529 這首歌很棒,我要去唱歌 369 00:20:39,529 --> 00:20:41,073 -好耶 -不,等等,媽... 370 00:20:41,073 --> 00:20:43,158 好了,放輕鬆 371 00:20:48,497 --> 00:20:50,707 -我得解釋一下 -好 372 00:20:51,667 --> 00:20:53,502 先...跟我來 373 00:20:59,216 --> 00:21:03,553 好,拜託解釋一下 你為什麼帶大家來這裡? 374 00:21:03,553 --> 00:21:05,889 我?不,是濟公帶大家來的 375 00:21:07,182 --> 00:21:09,893 那個酒醉的服務生嗎?他是濟公? 376 00:21:09,893 --> 00:21:13,689 對,他說那是他的偽裝 但我覺得他真的醉了 377 00:21:14,314 --> 00:21:15,482 好,太好了 378 00:21:15,482 --> 00:21:17,859 他跟我說了第四卷卷軸的事 379 00:21:17,859 --> 00:21:20,195 我要去告訴你,但你不在家 380 00:21:20,195 --> 00:21:23,365 -他一定是跟著我到你家 -對,還有這件事 381 00:21:23,365 --> 00:21:25,784 你要來我家,為什麼不先跟我說? 382 00:21:25,784 --> 00:21:29,037 我說了,只是你說你要做生物作業 383 00:21:30,247 --> 00:21:31,415 我來了 384 00:21:33,542 --> 00:21:35,377 誰要喝冰啤酒? 385 00:21:36,586 --> 00:21:38,046 我爸也來了? 386 00:21:39,464 --> 00:21:40,632 對 387 00:21:44,094 --> 00:21:46,430 讓他們夫妻倆唱,快上來 388 00:21:56,690 --> 00:21:57,941 -重複 -重複什麼? 389 00:21:57,941 --> 00:21:59,234 -重複「很好」 -我聽不到 390 00:21:59,234 --> 00:22:01,695 進,聽我說,第四卷卷軸 391 00:22:01,695 --> 00:22:04,531 我覺得它就在這裡,和你父母有關聯 392 00:22:05,157 --> 00:22:06,158 你說什麼? 393 00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:09,244 我覺得可能是你媽的玉墜 394 00:22:11,538 --> 00:22:13,248 可是你沒唱在進歌點上啊 395 00:22:13,248 --> 00:22:14,541 你看,你看,她就是這樣 396 00:22:14,541 --> 00:22:15,459 咄咄逼人啊 397 00:22:17,794 --> 00:22:21,006 如果我沒有逼他的話 他就動不了了,對不對? 398 00:22:21,006 --> 00:22:22,841 我動得了,妳看 399 00:22:22,841 --> 00:22:26,345 所以你就去我家,要看我父母的玉墜嗎? 400 00:22:26,345 --> 00:22:29,139 我在濟公的畫裡看到了交戰的兩方 401 00:22:29,639 --> 00:22:32,059 他們一直爭吵不休,就像你的父母 402 00:22:33,393 --> 00:22:36,271 這就是你的推論?你在開玩笑吧? 403 00:22:36,271 --> 00:22:38,148 沒有,我是認真的 404 00:22:38,148 --> 00:22:40,734 他們說他們的家族對立好幾代了 405 00:22:40,734 --> 00:22:43,695 濟公多年來一直在尋找卷軸 406 00:22:43,695 --> 00:22:47,949 -他也認同,可能就是那個玉墜 -好,很好 407 00:22:47,949 --> 00:22:51,161 是那個華人版的史派羅船長告訴你的 408 00:22:51,161 --> 00:22:53,663 沒錯喔,他看起來是很可靠的消息來源 409 00:22:54,331 --> 00:22:59,711 如果我沒有逼他去跟他老闆說升職的事情 他就沒得升職,現在人家要升職囉 410 00:23:00,754 --> 00:23:01,755 我哪裡有升職啊? 411 00:23:02,255 --> 00:23:03,298 什麼? 412 00:23:03,298 --> 00:23:04,508 我沒有升職啊 413 00:23:05,926 --> 00:23:07,386 阿派拿到那份工作了 414 00:23:29,991 --> 00:23:32,035 冰塊在哪? 415 00:23:33,120 --> 00:23:34,413 冰塊 416 00:23:34,413 --> 00:23:35,497 克莉絲汀 417 00:23:36,665 --> 00:23:38,625 我不明白妳為什麼這麼生氣啊? 418 00:23:40,502 --> 00:23:42,712 我更不明白你怎麼可以不生氣 419 00:23:42,712 --> 00:23:45,215 阿派才來你公司不到一年耶,不到一年耶 420 00:23:45,215 --> 00:23:47,050 我想清楚了 421 00:23:47,050 --> 00:23:48,427 我決定換工作 422 00:23:49,302 --> 00:23:50,303 你要辭職喔? 423 00:23:51,054 --> 00:23:52,639 你都沒有問過我耶,那... 424 00:23:52,639 --> 00:23:54,349 那以後我們生活怎麼辦啊? 425 00:23:54,349 --> 00:23:55,976 我們不是有存款嗎? 426 00:23:57,811 --> 00:23:58,687 那些錢不夠的 427 00:24:00,814 --> 00:24:03,150 我們存款可以頂幾個月 428 00:24:03,150 --> 00:24:06,653 你沒有聽清楚我在說什麼 那些錢是不夠用的 429 00:24:06,653 --> 00:24:08,071 妳開玩笑 430 00:24:08,071 --> 00:24:09,364 妳喝醉酒了 431 00:24:15,245 --> 00:24:16,496 我們錢去了哪裡? 432 00:24:18,081 --> 00:24:19,875 我拿去買貨啊,不是要做那個 433 00:24:19,875 --> 00:24:21,793 保健品的生意嗎? 434 00:24:21,793 --> 00:24:22,878 妳用了多少錢? 435 00:24:23,670 --> 00:24:26,047 我沒有用那些錢,我是拿去投資 436 00:24:26,047 --> 00:24:27,132 到底拿了多少錢? 437 00:24:29,092 --> 00:24:30,093 一半 438 00:24:42,814 --> 00:24:44,024 我要回家了 439 00:24:45,442 --> 00:24:47,569 好,改天見 440 00:24:48,278 --> 00:24:51,740 有些人就是沒辦法唱太久,對吧? 441 00:24:51,740 --> 00:24:53,074 好,下一首歌 442 00:24:53,074 --> 00:24:56,995 我...我很抱歉,看起來很糟 443 00:24:56,995 --> 00:25:00,540 但為了阻止叛變,這是必要之舉 444 00:25:00,540 --> 00:25:01,917 唱吧,各位女士 445 00:25:02,667 --> 00:25:05,003 如果玉墜蘊含了力量... 446 00:25:08,256 --> 00:25:09,299 玉墜 447 00:25:12,385 --> 00:25:13,428 維辰 448 00:25:20,185 --> 00:25:21,520 濟公 449 00:25:21,520 --> 00:25:22,854 維辰 450 00:25:22,854 --> 00:25:24,689 (下一首歌) (《我只在乎你》) 451 00:25:37,786 --> 00:25:38,787 濟公 452 00:25:40,080 --> 00:25:41,122 嗨 453 00:25:41,748 --> 00:25:42,874 這就是你的計畫嗎? 454 00:25:43,416 --> 00:25:46,211 分散大家的注意力,自己偷拿玉墜嗎? 455 00:25:47,921 --> 00:25:48,964 對 456 00:25:50,090 --> 00:25:51,800 這不也是你的計畫嗎? 457 00:25:53,635 --> 00:25:54,761 你不明白 458 00:25:55,804 --> 00:25:57,931 玉皇大帝和我父親需要它 459 00:25:59,975 --> 00:26:02,143 你也許不知情 460 00:26:02,143 --> 00:26:05,772 但很久以前,你爸搶走了我的工作 461 00:26:07,023 --> 00:26:08,483 沒錯 462 00:26:08,483 --> 00:26:11,152 我本來能當上一品大聖 463 00:26:11,152 --> 00:26:12,571 我才不相信 464 00:26:12,571 --> 00:26:15,699 我不管你信不信 465 00:26:17,033 --> 00:26:20,954 因為我要靠這個玉墜重返天界 466 00:26:21,913 --> 00:26:22,914 謝謝你告訴我 467 00:26:23,999 --> 00:26:26,293 嗨,進 468 00:26:26,293 --> 00:26:27,377 站住 469 00:28:16,736 --> 00:28:18,071 我沒事,我很好 470 00:28:25,578 --> 00:28:26,913 我們應該多出來 471 00:28:34,754 --> 00:28:37,298 -進 -你去哪了? 472 00:28:38,800 --> 00:28:40,635 天靈靈地靈靈 473 00:28:43,388 --> 00:28:45,014 你偷了我媽的玉墜嗎? 474 00:28:47,267 --> 00:28:48,977 什麼?我沒有 475 00:28:48,977 --> 00:28:53,398 也是啦,我從濟公手上搶回來的 476 00:28:56,151 --> 00:28:57,235 好,還給我 477 00:28:59,362 --> 00:29:00,363 什麼? 478 00:29:00,864 --> 00:29:02,615 不,我需要它 479 00:29:03,950 --> 00:29:05,577 -維辰,還給我 -等等 480 00:29:07,328 --> 00:29:08,538 這對我很重要 481 00:29:09,164 --> 00:29:13,126 對你很重要?這對我父母很重要 482 00:29:13,126 --> 00:29:15,503 因為你,他們剛剛大吵了一架 483 00:29:15,503 --> 00:29:18,298 我不在乎你是誰,或天界發生了什麼事 484 00:29:18,298 --> 00:29:22,385 你不能到別人家,拿走我們的東西 還當著我的面說謊 485 00:29:25,472 --> 00:29:26,639 我說謊了? 486 00:29:27,682 --> 00:29:30,185 不,你才說謊 487 00:29:31,102 --> 00:29:34,731 你不想當我的引路人 甚至不想當我的朋友 488 00:29:39,235 --> 00:29:42,155 維辰,重點不是這個 489 00:29:43,531 --> 00:29:45,074 那不是你的東西 490 00:29:46,326 --> 00:29:47,327 -還來 -住手 491 00:29:53,041 --> 00:29:56,085 -進,我很抱歉,你還好嗎? -放開啦 492 00:30:23,112 --> 00:30:24,948 不是你要找的東西嗎? 493 00:30:33,998 --> 00:30:37,752 葛蒂亞太太,很遺憾,妳的冰箱壞了 494 00:30:38,253 --> 00:30:40,213 我會盡快幫妳換一個 495 00:30:41,339 --> 00:30:43,383 謝謝你嘗試要修,傑米 496 00:30:43,383 --> 00:30:45,552 我買下這裡時,那個冰箱就在了 497 00:30:45,552 --> 00:30:47,470 我很驚訝它能撐那麼久 498 00:30:53,351 --> 00:30:54,477 來 499 00:30:55,478 --> 00:30:57,105 趁還沒壞掉前吃掉吧 500 00:30:58,147 --> 00:31:00,942 墨西哥香腸馬鈴薯,你的最愛 501 00:31:02,652 --> 00:31:05,905 我只愛吃妳做的,謝謝妳 502 00:31:05,905 --> 00:31:07,365 差點忘了 503 00:31:08,241 --> 00:31:11,953 來,我在這間大專學校教莎士比亞的課程 504 00:31:11,953 --> 00:31:14,455 我們下週要辦成果展 505 00:31:15,039 --> 00:31:17,000 你會表演嗎? 506 00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:20,086 我不會,我只會在幕後幫忙 507 00:31:20,086 --> 00:31:22,505 不是每個人都適合上台 508 00:31:23,214 --> 00:31:25,550 我要回去看劇了 509 00:31:25,550 --> 00:31:27,051 好,葛蒂亞太太 510 00:31:33,224 --> 00:31:35,852 -祝妳今天愉快 -再見 511 00:31:36,603 --> 00:31:39,147 但這好扯,這是你嗎? 512 00:31:39,147 --> 00:31:40,857 能出什麼錯呢? 513 00:32:43,002 --> 00:32:45,004 字幕翻譯:劉晏汝