1
00:00:05,038 --> 00:00:08,875
[ THUNDER CRASHES ]
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
2
00:00:08,942 --> 00:00:10,944
[ SAWING ]
[ ELECTRICITY CRACKLES ]
3
00:00:18,151 --> 00:00:19,853
IT'S ALIVE!
4
00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:32,465
[ THUNDER CRASHES ]
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
5
00:00:32,531 --> 00:00:38,138
[ SMOOCH! ]
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
6
00:00:38,204 --> 00:00:40,340
HUT ONE! HUT TWO! HUT --
AAH!
7
00:00:40,407 --> 00:00:43,109
DOUBLE CROSS, BITCH!
8
00:00:43,176 --> 00:00:45,044
WILSON! I SEE A BOAT!
9
00:00:45,111 --> 00:00:47,414
THERE'S A BOAT COMING THIS WAY!
10
00:00:47,480 --> 00:00:48,681
WE'RE RESCUED!
11
00:00:48,748 --> 00:00:49,682
GO! GO! GO! GO! GO!
12
00:00:49,749 --> 00:00:50,683
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
13
00:00:50,750 --> 00:00:52,652
WE ARE HIJACKING YOUR SHIP,
CAPTAIN.
14
00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:56,156
CALL YOUR GOVERNMENT AND TELL
THEM WE WANT $1 MILLION, OR WE
15
00:00:56,222 --> 00:00:57,257
WILL KILL YOU.
16
00:00:57,323 --> 00:00:59,893
EVERYONE THINKS I'M DEAD
ALREADY.
17
00:00:59,959 --> 00:01:03,029
OKAY, THIS IS, UH, CLEARLY A
MISTAKE.
18
00:01:03,096 --> 00:01:03,630
AAH!
19
00:01:03,696 --> 00:01:04,497
HOLY CRAP!
20
00:01:04,563 --> 00:01:05,899
IS THAT A BENGAL TIGER?
21
00:01:05,965 --> 00:01:08,201
[ GROWLS ]
AAH!
22
00:01:08,268 --> 00:01:09,469
RICHARD PARKER!
23
00:01:09,536 --> 00:01:10,103
WILSON!
24
00:01:10,170 --> 00:01:11,371
RICHARD PARKER!
25
00:01:11,438 --> 00:01:12,138
WILSON!
26
00:01:12,205 --> 00:01:13,706
RICHARD PARKER!
27
00:01:13,773 --> 00:01:15,108
WILSON!!
28
00:01:15,175 --> 00:01:17,444
RICHARD PARKER!!
29
00:01:17,510 --> 00:01:19,679
WELCOME BACK TO BOXING NIGHT
HERE IN BANGKOK.
30
00:01:19,746 --> 00:01:22,749
THE CHAMPION IS
SAENSAK PAYAKAROON, A PROUD THAI
31
00:01:22,816 --> 00:01:23,850
FIGHTER.
32
00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:25,952
HIS CHALLENGER IS ANOTHER THAI
FIGHTER -- TIE FIGHTER.
33
00:01:26,019 --> 00:01:27,954
[ BELL CLANGS ]
AND THE BELLS CLANG, AND
34
00:01:28,021 --> 00:01:30,757
PAYAKAROON ADVANCES ON HIS
OPPONENT AND LANDS A RIGHT JAB
35
00:01:30,824 --> 00:01:33,593
AND A HOOK, AND NOW ANOTHER
SOLID JAB, AND IT DOESN'T SEEM
36
00:01:33,660 --> 00:01:35,795
TO BE FAZING THE EMPIRE
STARFIGHTER AT ALL!
37
00:01:35,862 --> 00:01:38,731
IF ANYTHING, PAYAKAROON SEEMS TO
BE INJURING HIS OWN HAND,
38
00:01:38,798 --> 00:01:41,134
SHOOTING PUNCHES STRAIGHT INTO
THE METAL HULL.
39
00:01:41,201 --> 00:01:42,168
OOH!
40
00:01:42,235 --> 00:01:44,137
AND THERE'S A LASER BLAST FROM
THE TIE FIGHTER, AND
41
00:01:44,204 --> 00:01:46,473
PAYAKAROON'S HEAD IS BLOWN CLEAR
OFF.
42
00:01:46,539 --> 00:01:49,609
TIE FIGHTER WINS HIS FIRST FIGHT
WITH A DECISIVE VICTORY.
43
00:01:49,676 --> 00:01:52,912
THEY ARE TRYING TO ATTACH THE
CHAMPIONSHIP BELT TO HIS WAIST,
44
00:01:52,979 --> 00:01:55,114
AND HE DOES NOT LIKE IT!
45
00:01:55,181 --> 00:01:57,650
BABY, I'VE GOT A SECRET, BUT
I'M AFRAID TO TELL YOU.
46
00:01:57,717 --> 00:01:58,618
IT'S OKAY, BABY.
47
00:01:58,685 --> 00:01:59,652
YOU JUST SAY IT.
48
00:01:59,719 --> 00:02:02,188
I-I JUST PUT ON THIS FROSTING
SO YOU'D LIKE ME.
49
00:02:02,255 --> 00:02:04,023
I'M ACTUALLY A BAGEL.
50
00:02:04,090 --> 00:02:08,228
[ SOBS ]
YOU'RE JEWISH?!
51
00:02:08,294 --> 00:02:08,862
KAL-EL.
52
00:02:08,928 --> 00:02:09,963
FATHER?
53
00:02:10,029 --> 00:02:12,198
I'VE PROGRAMMED A HOLOGRAM OF
MYSELF TO ASSIST YOU.
54
00:02:12,265 --> 00:02:14,400
GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE
GENERAL ZOD ARRIVES.
55
00:02:14,467 --> 00:02:16,836
THANK YOU, FATHER.
56
00:02:16,903 --> 00:02:19,339
LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE EATING TOO
MUCH DAIRY, KAL-EL.
57
00:02:19,405 --> 00:02:20,840
DAD! I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP!
58
00:02:20,907 --> 00:02:23,009
YOUR DIGESTIVE TRACT SUGGESTS
OTHERWISE.
59
00:02:23,076 --> 00:02:25,245
THAT'S GOING TO BE A TRIPLE
WIPE -- MAYBE MORE.
60
00:02:25,311 --> 00:02:26,279
AIM FOR A ONE-WIPER.
61
00:02:26,346 --> 00:02:28,147
TRY TO EAT LESS CHEESE.
62
00:02:28,214 --> 00:02:29,849
UGH! RIDICULOUS!
63
00:02:29,916 --> 00:02:30,650
OH, CLARK.
64
00:02:30,716 --> 00:02:32,652
I THINK I'M READY TO GO ALL THE
WAY.
65
00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:34,353
GAME TIME, LOIS.
66
00:02:34,420 --> 00:02:37,023
[ BOTH SMOOCHING ]
I'D BEGIN WITH FOREPLAY,
67
00:02:37,090 --> 00:02:37,557
KAL-EL.
68
00:02:37,624 --> 00:02:38,625
WHAT'S GOING ON?!
69
00:02:38,691 --> 00:02:39,726
WHO'S THAT?!
70
00:02:39,792 --> 00:02:42,161
START BY KISSING HER INNER
THIGH, THEN SPELL OUT THE
71
00:02:42,228 --> 00:02:44,397
ALPHABET ON HER CLITORIS WITH
YOUR TONGUE.
72
00:02:44,464 --> 00:02:46,766
THE KRYPTON ALPHABET,
SPECIFICALLY THE LETTER
73
00:02:46,833 --> 00:02:50,203
[BABBLING WILDLY]
DAD! THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING!
74
00:02:50,270 --> 00:02:53,305
YOUR DEAD FATHER MAKES SOME
GOOD POINTS ABOUT CUNNILINGUS.
75
00:02:53,373 --> 00:02:54,040
THANKS.
76
00:02:54,107 --> 00:02:56,676
JOR-ELCOME.
77
00:02:56,743 --> 00:02:58,211
ARE YOU A HOUSE?
78
00:02:58,278 --> 00:02:59,145
UH, NO.
79
00:02:59,212 --> 00:03:03,049
[ MACHINE BEEPING ]
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
80
00:03:03,116 --> 00:03:05,051
FLY WITH ME TO NEVER LAND!
81
00:03:05,118 --> 00:03:07,987
[ CHILDREN LAUGHING ]
CHILDREN! NO!
82
00:03:08,054 --> 00:03:09,489
THESE ARE THE LOST BOYS.
83
00:03:09,556 --> 00:03:10,723
THEY'RE NOT VAMPIRES.
84
00:03:10,790 --> 00:03:14,561
[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]
WE...HAVE A PHONE?
85
00:03:14,627 --> 00:03:15,194
HELLO?
86
00:03:15,261 --> 00:03:16,496
I don't know who you are.
87
00:03:16,563 --> 00:03:17,931
I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT.
88
00:03:17,997 --> 00:03:20,099
I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU DRESS
LIKE...?
89
00:03:20,166 --> 00:03:21,200
A GAY ROBIN HOOD.
90
00:03:21,267 --> 00:03:22,502
LIKE A GAY ROBIN HOOD.
91
00:03:22,569 --> 00:03:25,371
BUT I HAVE A VERY PARTICULAR SET
OF SKILLS THAT MAKE ME A
92
00:03:25,438 --> 00:03:28,708
NIGHTMARE FOR PEOPLE LIKE YOU,
BY WHICH I GUESS I MEAN FLYING
93
00:03:28,775 --> 00:03:29,909
GAY ROBIN HOODS.
94
00:03:29,976 --> 00:03:32,712
GOOD LUCK FINDING NEVER LAND,
GRANDPA.
95
00:03:32,779 --> 00:03:35,148
[ RECEIVER SLAMS ]
OH, WHAT'S HE SAYING?
96
00:03:35,214 --> 00:03:40,320
[ Dial tone ]
HE'S SAYING "AHHHHHHHHHHHH."
97
00:03:40,386 --> 00:03:41,621
THAT'S THE DIAL TONE.
98
00:03:41,688 --> 00:03:42,454
DIAL TONE?
99
00:03:42,522 --> 00:03:43,790
THIS IS A VERY OLD PHONE.
100
00:03:43,856 --> 00:03:47,026
HE'S HOLDING YOUR CHILDREN IN
WHAT I PRESUME IS AN UNDERGROUND
101
00:03:47,093 --> 00:03:48,561
SEX CLUB CALLED "NEVER LAND."
102
00:03:48,628 --> 00:03:51,598
OH, THANK GOODNESS YOU DO
SECURITY WORK FOR BANKERS, LIKE
103
00:03:51,664 --> 00:03:52,632
MYSELF, MR. MILLS.
104
00:03:52,699 --> 00:03:54,767
BUT HOW WILL YOU REACH THE
CHILDREN?
105
00:03:54,834 --> 00:03:55,935
THEY WERE FLYING.
106
00:03:56,002 --> 00:03:58,905
I THINK I HEARD THEM SAY
SOMETHING ABOUT "THINKING HAPPY
107
00:03:58,972 --> 00:03:59,672
THOUGHTS."
108
00:03:59,739 --> 00:04:01,007
HAPPY THOUGHTS, EH?
109
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:02,175
NO! NO, PLEASE!
110
00:04:02,241 --> 00:04:03,042
AAH!
111
00:04:03,109 --> 00:04:04,277
WHOO-HOO! OFF I GO!
112
00:04:04,344 --> 00:04:05,244
[ CRASH ]
AAH!
113
00:04:10,049 --> 00:04:12,685
UGH!
114
00:04:12,752 --> 00:04:14,654
AAH!
115
00:04:16,755 --> 00:04:20,493
[ FARTS ]
I JUST POOPED IN MY TAIL!
116
00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:21,894
WHERE ARE THE CHILDREN?
117
00:04:21,961 --> 00:04:24,497
[ FARTS ]
I'VE NEVER MET REAL-LIVE
118
00:04:24,564 --> 00:04:25,765
MERMAIDS BEFORE!
119
00:04:25,832 --> 00:04:27,266
OH-HO! THAT'S SO FUN!
120
00:04:27,332 --> 00:04:28,868
LET'S DROWN THIS BITCH.
121
00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:30,870
NO! PLEASE! DON'T!
122
00:04:30,937 --> 00:04:33,006
NO! NO! OH!
123
00:04:34,707 --> 00:04:36,009
WENDY, WHERE ARE YOUR
BROTHERS?
124
00:04:36,075 --> 00:04:37,877
THERE! ON THE PIRATE SHIP!
125
00:04:37,944 --> 00:04:42,081
TIME FOR THESE LITTLE
CHICKADEES TO WALK THE PLANK!
126
00:04:42,148 --> 00:04:45,451
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
TICKTOCK. TIME'S UP.
127
00:04:45,518 --> 00:04:46,419
HYAH!
128
00:04:46,486 --> 00:04:47,954
AAAAAAAH!
129
00:04:48,021 --> 00:04:49,122
I'M TAKING YOU HOME,
CHILDREN.
130
00:04:49,188 --> 00:04:52,125
NOT SO FAST, YOU OLD CODFISH!
131
00:04:52,191 --> 00:04:53,726
OOH! NAH NAH NAH!
132
00:04:53,793 --> 00:04:57,497
NAH NA--
TINK!
133
00:04:57,563 --> 00:05:01,067
GOOD LUCK GETTING HOME WITHOUT
HER FAIRY DUST, ASSHOLE!
134
00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:04,203
WHY WOULD I WANT TO LEAVE
WHEN MY HAPPY THOUGHT'S ABOUT TO
135
00:05:04,270 --> 00:05:04,871
COME TRUE?
136
00:05:04,937 --> 00:05:05,772
YOUR WHAT?
137
00:05:05,838 --> 00:05:08,107
OH! NO! NO --
AAH!
138
00:05:08,174 --> 00:05:11,544
OKAY, BUT SERIOUSLY, MAN, HOW
THE FUCK ARE WE GETTING
139
00:05:11,611 --> 00:05:12,111
HOME?!
140
00:05:12,178 --> 00:05:12,912
HANG ON.
141
00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:14,180
OH! NO! NO! WAIT!
142
00:05:14,247 --> 00:05:15,348
AAH!
143
00:05:15,415 --> 00:05:17,350
[ HUMMING ]
"A BUT TUBA"?
144
00:05:24,590 --> 00:05:27,727
THIS LOOKS LIKE THE WORK OF --
WAS IT A BAT I SAW?
145
00:05:27,794 --> 00:05:28,928
PALINDROME.
146
00:05:28,995 --> 00:05:32,265
I SEE YOU'RE STILL TALKING IN
SENTENCES THAT ARE SPELLED THE
147
00:05:32,331 --> 00:05:33,866
SAME FORWARD AND BACKWARD.
148
00:05:33,933 --> 00:05:35,268
WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING?
149
00:05:35,334 --> 00:05:39,472
EVIL I DID DWELL, LEWD I DID
LIVE.
150
00:05:39,539 --> 00:05:42,742
TELL ME, WHY DO YOU CONTINUE
TO HAUNT GOTHAM, PALINDROME?
151
00:05:42,808 --> 00:05:45,745
MR. OWL ATE MY METAL WORM.
152
00:05:45,812 --> 00:05:46,679
MR. OWL?
153
00:05:46,746 --> 00:05:48,181
I DON'T KNOW MR. OWL!
154
00:05:48,247 --> 00:05:50,983
GO HANG A SALAMI, I'M A
LASAGNA HOG.
155
00:05:51,050 --> 00:05:53,419
OVER MY DEAD BODY,
PALINDROME.
156
00:05:53,486 --> 00:05:53,986
YAH!
157
00:05:54,053 --> 00:05:55,655
YARG! GOD DAM MAD DOG.
158
00:05:55,722 --> 00:05:58,057
I SHOULD FEED YOU TO THE
DOGS.
159
00:05:58,124 --> 00:05:59,759
NO, SIR. PREFER PRISON.
160
00:05:59,826 --> 00:06:02,595
IT'S NOT TOO LATE FOR YOU,
PALINDROME.
161
00:06:02,662 --> 00:06:04,230
YOU COULD STILL DO GOOD.
162
00:06:04,297 --> 00:06:06,532
DO GOOD, I? NO!
163
00:06:06,599 --> 00:06:11,771
EVIL ANON I DELIVER, I MAIM NINE
MORE HERO MEN IN SAGINAW,
164
00:06:11,838 --> 00:06:14,674
SANITARY SWORD A-TUCK, CAROL, I.
165
00:06:14,741 --> 00:06:18,144
LO! RACK, CAUGHT A DROWSY RAT IN
ASWAN.
166
00:06:18,211 --> 00:06:21,280
I GAS NINE MORE HERO MEN IN
MIAMI.
167
00:06:21,347 --> 00:06:24,584
REVILED I, NONA, LIVE ON.
168
00:06:24,650 --> 00:06:26,986
I DO -- OH, GOD!
169
00:06:27,053 --> 00:06:29,088
WOW.
170
00:06:29,155 --> 00:06:32,992
THAT WAS IMPRESSIVE.
171
00:06:33,058 --> 00:06:33,993
YAH!
172
00:06:34,060 --> 00:06:35,428
YARG!
173
00:06:35,495 --> 00:06:37,096
LOOK, HONEY! A SHOOTING STAR!
174
00:06:37,163 --> 00:06:39,031
AWW!
175
00:06:39,098 --> 00:06:41,868
DOMINO, MOTHER FUCKER
[ MACHINE GUN FIRING ]
176
00:06:41,933 --> 00:06:43,136
Both: AH! AH! AAAAAH!
177
00:06:43,202 --> 00:06:45,638
THANKS FOR THROWING ME A
WELCOMING PARTY, COUNT.
178
00:06:45,705 --> 00:06:48,608
I'VE NEVER BEEN TO A PARTY
HOSTED BY A VAMPIRE BEFORE.
179
00:06:48,674 --> 00:06:51,144
I DO IT FOR ALL THE
NEWCOMERS, ALEX.
180
00:06:51,210 --> 00:06:53,946
AFTER TONIGHT, I GUARANTEE
YOU'LL BE...
181
00:06:54,013 --> 00:06:55,381
ONE OF US.
182
00:06:55,448 --> 00:06:58,117
ANH ANH ANH ANH!
183
00:06:58,183 --> 00:07:00,286
[ TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING ]
MMM.
184
00:07:04,257 --> 00:07:05,324
MMM.
185
00:07:05,391 --> 00:07:07,760
I GUESS WHEN OUR SHOW'S
GUESTS INCLUDE KATY PERRY AND
186
00:07:07,827 --> 00:07:09,962
ICE-T, IT'S A SLIPPERY SLOPE.
187
00:07:10,029 --> 00:07:11,898
WHOO-HOO-HOO!
188
00:07:11,964 --> 00:07:14,567
HEY, GROVER. HI, SNUFFY.
189
00:07:14,634 --> 00:07:15,735
HUH?
190
00:07:17,570 --> 00:07:18,504
OH, NO!
191
00:07:18,571 --> 00:07:22,108
THE COUNT -- H-HE TURNED YOU
ALL INTO THE UNDEAD!
192
00:07:22,175 --> 00:07:25,344
IF YOU ASSUMED I WAS A
VAMPIRE IN EVERY OTHER WAY BUT
193
00:07:25,411 --> 00:07:28,915
THAT, THEN I COUNT ONE -- ONE
MORON.
194
00:07:28,981 --> 00:07:31,417
AAH! AAH! OH, NO!
195
00:07:31,484 --> 00:07:32,451
AAH! OH!
196
00:07:32,518 --> 00:07:35,154
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
OH, NICE CHARACTER INTRO.
197
00:07:35,221 --> 00:07:38,457
HOW LONG YOU BEEN WAITIN' HERE
WATCHING ME SHIT MYSELF?
198
00:07:38,524 --> 00:07:40,960
GET HIM!
199
00:07:41,027 --> 00:07:41,694
OOH!
200
00:07:41,761 --> 00:07:42,695
AAH!
201
00:07:42,762 --> 00:07:44,964
"S" IS FOR "SEVER."
202
00:07:46,933 --> 00:07:47,633
HA!
203
00:07:47,700 --> 00:07:50,002
FLAWLESS BUILT-IN DEFENSE
SYSTEM.
204
00:07:50,069 --> 00:07:51,904
WAIT! W-WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
205
00:07:51,971 --> 00:07:52,605
AAH!
206
00:07:52,672 --> 00:07:53,573
OOF!
207
00:07:53,639 --> 00:07:56,808
I SEE ONE -- ONE DEAD MOTHER--
OH, MY GOODNESS.
208
00:07:56,876 --> 00:07:58,444
THERE'S NOT A SPECK OF BLOOD ON
YOU.
209
00:07:58,511 --> 00:08:00,947
WHAT, DO YOU KEEP A PACK OF
HANDI WIPES IN THAT FLAK JACKET?
210
00:08:01,013 --> 00:08:02,615
NO. JUST THIS.
211
00:08:02,682 --> 00:08:05,051
ONE. TWO --
STOP COUNTING.
212
00:08:05,117 --> 00:08:06,953
THAT WAS A PLAY-BY-PLAY.
213
00:08:07,019 --> 00:08:10,189
I JUST PISSED AND SHIT IN MY
OWN PANTS.
214
00:08:10,256 --> 00:08:10,923
AAH!
215
00:08:10,990 --> 00:08:14,727
[ CHOKING ]
WOW.
216
00:08:14,794 --> 00:08:17,530
SO, I GUESS IF YOU'VE HUNTED ALL
THE WAY TO SESAME STREET, YOU
217
00:08:17,597 --> 00:08:19,632
MUST HAVE GOTTEN EVERY VAMPIRE
IN THE WORLD.
218
00:08:19,699 --> 00:08:20,933
NOT QUITE.
219
00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:23,035
WHO WANTS SOME OF MY
COUNT CHOCULA CEREAL?
220
00:08:23,102 --> 00:08:25,771
WHICH, IF LOOKED AT FROM A VERY
SPECIFIC POINT OF VIEW, IS A
221
00:08:25,838 --> 00:08:27,807
NUTRITIOUS PART OF THIS BALANCED
BREAKFAST.
222
00:08:27,874 --> 00:08:30,710
[ SHOTGUN COCKS ]
YOU!
223
00:08:30,776 --> 00:08:31,878
ALMOST DONE THERE, DOC?
224
00:08:31,944 --> 00:08:33,212
JUST A SECOND, MR. PETERSON.
225
00:08:33,279 --> 00:08:33,880
I...
226
00:08:33,946 --> 00:08:35,381
YES, I AM DONE.
227
00:08:35,448 --> 00:08:37,149
I'D LIKE TO DO FURTHER TESTS,
BUT I --
228
00:08:37,216 --> 00:08:37,683
MY WATCH!
229
00:08:37,750 --> 00:08:38,885
YOINK!
230
00:08:38,951 --> 00:08:40,253
[ Nerdy voice ] WHAT'S GOING
ON?
231
00:08:40,318 --> 00:08:42,221
[ Nerdy voice ] THEY
ANNOUNCED THE PREMIERE DATE FOR
232
00:08:42,288 --> 00:08:43,923
"STAR WARS: EPISODE VII."
233
00:08:43,990 --> 00:08:45,458
IT'S GONNA BE SO COOL!
234
00:08:45,524 --> 00:08:50,029
YEAH. IT'S SO COOL.
235
00:08:50,096 --> 00:08:53,232
♪ I SHOULD BE HAPPY ABOUT
"STAR WARS" ♪
236
00:08:53,299 --> 00:08:57,270
♪ BUT JUST LIKE BLUE MILK, I
FEEL BLUE ♪
237
00:08:57,336 --> 00:09:00,773
♪ 'CAUSE WHAT IF IT'S A MESS?
♪ I CAN'T HELP BUT OBSESS
238
00:09:00,840 --> 00:09:06,445
♪ ABOUT ALL THE HORRIBLE CRAP
THEY COULD DO ♪
239
00:09:06,512 --> 00:09:09,515
♪ THEY COULD GIVE LIGHTSABERS TO
EWOKS ♪
240
00:09:09,582 --> 00:09:12,351
♪ MAKE BOBA FETT HAVE A
TALKING DOG FRIEND ♪
241
00:09:12,418 --> 00:09:13,619
VOICED BY EDDIE MURPHY.
242
00:09:13,686 --> 00:09:14,553
HEH HEH HEH HEH...
243
00:09:14,620 --> 00:09:16,122
♪ PRODUCT PLACEMENT WOULD BE
SAD ♪
244
00:09:16,188 --> 00:09:18,257
♪ PLOT TWIST, LUKE IS HIS OWN
DAD ♪
245
00:09:18,324 --> 00:09:19,525
I'LL NEVER JOIN ME!
246
00:09:19,592 --> 00:09:21,727
♪ AND EVERYONE HIGH-FIVES IN
THE END ♪
247
00:09:21,794 --> 00:09:23,963
All: YEAH! DON'T DO DRUGS!
248
00:09:24,030 --> 00:09:27,667
♪ THEY COULD SAVE ALL OF THE
WOOKIEES ♪
249
00:09:27,733 --> 00:09:30,236
♪ AND DRESS THEM UP IN BUSINESS
SUITS ♪
250
00:09:30,303 --> 00:09:32,305
♪ ACKBAR SAID...
IT'S A RAP!
251
00:09:32,371 --> 00:09:35,708
♪ AND THEN HE STARTS TO RAP
♪ AND HAN SAYS A CATCHPHRASE
252
00:09:35,775 --> 00:09:38,844
WHEN HE SHOOTS ♪
OH, DID I DO THAT?
253
00:09:38,911 --> 00:09:41,981
♪ OH, I'VE BEEN BURNED SO
MANY TIMES BEFORE ♪
254
00:09:42,048 --> 00:09:44,951
♪ GREEN LANTERN, PROMETHEUS,
2 GIRLS 1 CUP ♪
255
00:09:45,017 --> 00:09:48,220
♪ BUT "STAR WARS" IS THE ONE
THAT I MOST ADORE ♪
256
00:09:48,287 --> 00:09:51,790
♪ PLEASE, J.J., DON'T FUCK
THIS UP ♪
257
00:09:51,857 --> 00:09:54,860
All: ♪ U-U-U-U-U-U-U-U-UP
[ VOMITS ]
258
00:09:54,927 --> 00:09:57,797
♪ I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S REAL
ANYMORE ♪
259
00:09:57,863 --> 00:10:00,599
♪ "STAR WARS" HAS BECOME MY SAD
FIXATION ♪
260
00:10:00,666 --> 00:10:03,002
♪ MOM WANTED ME TO BE A
SURGEON ♪
261
00:10:03,069 --> 00:10:08,007
♪ I'M 26 AND STILL A --
comic collector.
262
00:10:08,074 --> 00:10:09,141
OHHHH!
263
00:10:11,844 --> 00:10:14,046
♪ BUT NEVER MIND
♪ THESE MOVIES COULD BE
264
00:10:14,113 --> 00:10:16,482
AWESOME ♪
♪ A MILLION FORCE GHOSTS GOING
265
00:10:16,549 --> 00:10:19,652
ON A KILLING SPREE ♪
♪ GIANT SPACE WORMS EVERYWHERE
266
00:10:19,719 --> 00:10:21,487
♪ CHEWIE'S GROWN BACK ALL HIS
HAIR ♪
267
00:10:21,554 --> 00:10:25,558
♪ I'LL CAMP OUT FOR A WHOLE YEAR
JUST TO SEE ♪
268
00:10:25,624 --> 00:10:29,061
♪ "STAR WARS: EPISODE VII" SHOT
IN IMAX AND 3-D ♪
269
00:10:29,128 --> 00:10:31,764
AND STARRING ME AS
LUKE SKYWALKER'S FAVORITE SON,
270
00:10:31,831 --> 00:10:35,167
WHO GETS THE BEST STUFF, LIKE
LIGHTSABERS MADE OF GOLD!
271
00:10:35,234 --> 00:10:42,008
♪ AND FINALLY HAS SEX
[ ALL CHEER ]
272
00:10:42,074 --> 00:10:44,410
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK
273
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:46,545
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK-A-WAWK WAWK
BAWK BAWK ♪
274
00:10:46,612 --> 00:10:48,681
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK
275
00:10:48,748 --> 00:10:50,850
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK-A-WAWK WAWK
BAWK BAWK ♪
276
00:10:50,915 --> 00:10:52,985
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK
277
00:10:53,052 --> 00:10:55,187
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK-A-WAWK WAWK
BAWK BAWK ♪
278
00:10:55,254 --> 00:10:59,058
BA-GAWK! BAWK.
279
00:10:59,125 --> 00:11:00,292
WILSON!
280
00:11:00,359 --> 00:11:02,161
RICHARD PARKER!
281
00:11:02,228 --> 00:11:03,396
WILSON!
282
00:11:03,462 --> 00:11:05,264
RICHARD PARKER!
283
00:11:05,331 --> 00:11:06,499
WILSON!
284
00:11:06,565 --> 00:11:08,234
RICHARD PARKER!