1
00:00:04,971 --> 00:00:15,982
[ THUNDER CRASHING ]
[ DRILLING, SAWING ]

2
00:00:16,049 --> 00:00:26,025
[ ELECTRICITY CRACKLING ]
>> IT'S ALIVE!

3
00:00:26,092 --> 00:00:38,271
[ ELECTRICITY CRACKLING ]
>> IT'S ALIVE!

4
00:00:38,338 --> 00:00:39,139
>> HEY, EVERYBODY.

5
00:00:39,205 --> 00:00:40,206
I'M JOEY FATONE.

6
00:00:40,273 --> 00:00:42,208
NOW, YOU MAY HAVE NOTICED I
HAVEN'T APPEARED IN MANY

7
00:00:42,275 --> 00:00:43,209
SKETCHES LATELY.

8
00:00:43,276 --> 00:00:45,779
AIR-JO, [ergo] I DECIDED TO
PITCH ONE OF MY OWN.

9
00:00:45,845 --> 00:00:47,046
HERE WE GO.

10
00:00:47,113 --> 00:00:49,482
SO, I'M SINGING AT THIS CHARITY
EVENT AT THE SAN DIEGO ZOO, WHEN

11
00:00:49,549 --> 00:00:52,051
ALL OF A SUDDEN, I COME ACROSS
THIS KANGAROO.

12
00:00:52,118 --> 00:00:55,422
TURNS OUT SHE LOST HER
[CHUCKLES] JOEY -- YEAH, YOU SEE

13
00:00:55,488 --> 00:00:56,723
WHERE THIS IS GOING.

14
00:00:56,790 --> 00:01:00,460
ANYWAY, THE MAMA KANGAROO FALLS
IN LOVE WITH ME AND REFUSES TO

15
00:01:00,527 --> 00:01:01,628
LET ME LEAVE.

16
00:01:01,694 --> 00:01:04,431
YOU KNOW, I APPEASE HER FOR A
BIT, GO ALONG WITH THE RIDE,

17
00:01:04,497 --> 00:01:08,501
UNTIL I REALIZE THAT HER BOXING
TECHNIQUE IS THE EXACT THING I

18
00:01:08,568 --> 00:01:11,771
NEED TO COMPETE IN THE WWE's
ROYAL RUMBLE!

19
00:01:11,838 --> 00:01:12,705
OOH!

20
00:01:12,772 --> 00:01:14,607
I'M GETTING EXCITED JUST
THINKING ABOUT THIS.

21
00:01:14,674 --> 00:01:18,144
OH, AND DID I MENTION IT'S BEING
HELD IN AUSTRALIA?

22
00:01:18,211 --> 00:01:20,613
PUT ANOTHER SHRIMP ON THE
BARBIE.

23
00:01:20,680 --> 00:01:22,515
[ LAUGHS ]
SO THE KANGAROO AND I

24
00:01:22,582 --> 00:01:25,185
HEAD OUT ON AN ADVENTURE
THAT'S PART "ROCKY," PART

25
00:01:25,251 --> 00:01:26,419
"CROCODILE DUNDEE II."

26
00:01:26,486 --> 00:01:29,355
IT ENDS WITH ME WINNING THE
EVENT AND THE KANGAROO GETTING

27
00:01:29,422 --> 00:01:31,758
REUNITED WITH HER ACTUAL JOEY.

28
00:01:31,825 --> 00:01:34,194
YOU SEE, NOW I'M SORRY THIS IS
JUST A PITCH AND NOT AN ACTUAL

29
00:01:34,259 --> 00:01:34,894
SKETCH ALREADY.

30
00:01:34,961 --> 00:01:36,596
BUT ANYWAY -- HANG TIGHT.

31
00:01:36,663 --> 00:01:42,902
I'M SURE IT'S JUST A MATTER OF
TIME.

32
00:01:42,969 --> 00:01:53,346
[ ALL MUNCHING ]
>> [ VOMITS, COUGHS ]

33
00:01:53,413 --> 00:01:56,883
>> [ MUNCH! ]
NOT -- NOT OKAY?

34
00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:58,485
IS THAT NOT OKAY?

35
00:01:58,551 --> 00:01:59,118
>> WOW!

36
00:01:59,185 --> 00:02:00,520
I'M GETTING MY VERY OWN CAR!

37
00:02:00,587 --> 00:02:02,856
>> AS LONG AS IT COSTS 100 BUCKS
OR LESS.

38
00:02:02,922 --> 00:02:04,524
>> BUT CARS COST MORE THAN THAT.

39
00:02:04,591 --> 00:02:05,925
>> WELL, THIS ONE DOESN'T.

40
00:02:05,992 --> 00:02:08,026
>> THAT'S...NOT A CAR.

41
00:02:08,094 --> 00:02:09,496
>> OH, I WANT THAT ONE!

42
00:02:09,562 --> 00:02:10,663
>> SOLD AMERICAN!

43
00:02:10,729 --> 00:02:11,431
>> OH, WOW!

44
00:02:11,498 --> 00:02:13,132
>> THANK YOU FOR PURCHASING ME.

45
00:02:13,199 --> 00:02:15,101
LET'S GO ON AN AWESOME
ADVENTURE.

46
00:02:15,168 --> 00:02:18,605
>> [ LAUGHS ]
THIS IS THE GREATEST PRESENT OF

47
00:02:18,671 --> 00:02:20,139
MY LIFE!

48
00:02:20,206 --> 00:02:22,442
>> [ SIGHS ]
WELL, MIGHT AS WELL MAKE THE

49
00:02:22,509 --> 00:02:24,444
BEST OF THIS CRAP SANDWICH.

50
00:02:24,511 --> 00:02:25,812
>> MY NAME'S SCOOTER.

51
00:02:25,879 --> 00:02:27,013
HELLO, NEW FRIEND.

52
00:02:27,079 --> 00:02:27,647
>> WOW!

53
00:02:27,714 --> 00:02:28,948
YOU'RE A ROBOT, TOO!

54
00:02:29,015 --> 00:02:30,550
>> I'M BETTER THAN A ROBOT.

55
00:02:30,617 --> 00:02:31,718
I'M A GO-BOT.

56
00:02:31,784 --> 00:02:34,320
>> MAYBE THIS WILL BE A GREAT
PRESENT AFTER ALL.

57
00:02:34,387 --> 00:02:35,954
AHHH...YOU'RE KIND OF PUNY.

58
00:02:36,022 --> 00:02:38,358
>> GOOD THINGS COME IN SMALL
PACKAGES.

59
00:02:38,424 --> 00:02:39,692
>> LIKE WHAT KIND OF GOOD
THINGS?

60
00:02:39,759 --> 00:02:40,627
DO YOU KICK A LOT OF ASS?

61
00:02:40,692 --> 00:02:42,095
>> OH, NO. I HATE FIGHTING.

62
00:02:42,161 --> 00:02:44,364
BUT I DO KNOW A LOT OF
KNOCK-KNOCK JOKES.

63
00:02:44,430 --> 00:02:46,065
>> OH, GOOD. THAT'LL BE HELPFUL.

64
00:02:46,132 --> 00:02:47,300
LOOK, YOU GOT TO HELP ME.

65
00:02:47,367 --> 00:02:49,736
BAD ENOUGH I GOT TO RIDE A
[BLEEP] MOPED TO SCHOOL.

66
00:02:49,802 --> 00:02:52,539
I DON'T WANT IT TO BE AN
ANNOYING PUSS-BOT, AS WELL.

67
00:02:52,605 --> 00:02:53,873
>> HEY, DON'T WORRY, KID.

68
00:02:53,940 --> 00:02:55,174
I'LL SEE WHAT I CAN DO.

69
00:02:55,241 --> 00:02:56,209
>> SAFETY FIRST.

70
00:02:56,276 --> 00:02:58,878
ALWAYS WEAR EYE PROTECTION WHEN
USING A BLOWTORCH.

71
00:02:58,945 --> 00:03:00,146
>> THANKS FOR THE TIP.

72
00:03:00,213 --> 00:03:03,383
>> [ SCREAMING ]
>> SO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING, NOW?

73
00:03:03,449 --> 00:03:05,485
>> DISABLING THE SERVOMOTOR, FOR
STARTERS.

74
00:03:05,552 --> 00:03:07,520
>> OH, AND THAT'S HOW THE
MOTOR'S WIRED IN?

75
00:03:07,587 --> 00:03:08,288
>> YEAH, RIGHT.

76
00:03:08,353 --> 00:03:09,522
SO I'M CUTTING THOSE WIRES.

77
00:03:09,589 --> 00:03:10,189
>> OH.

78
00:03:10,256 --> 00:03:11,324
DID YOU GO TO SCHOOL FOR THIS?

79
00:03:11,391 --> 00:03:12,492
>> SURE DID.

80
00:03:12,559 --> 00:03:14,227
THERE'S A GREAT AUTOMOTIVE
PROGRAM AT EAST VALLEY COMMUNITY

81
00:03:14,294 --> 00:03:15,094
COLLEGE.

82
00:03:15,161 --> 00:03:16,329
>> I'LL LET YOU RIDE ME AND
EVERYTHING!

83
00:03:16,396 --> 00:03:19,666
[ SHRIEKS ]
>> WOW! THANKS!

84
00:03:19,732 --> 00:03:21,100
IT'S AWESOME NOW!

85
00:03:21,167 --> 00:03:22,735
>> WANT TO KEEP THE FACE?

86
00:03:22,802 --> 00:03:23,369
>> NAH.

87
00:03:23,436 --> 00:03:24,137
YEAH-HEH!

88
00:03:24,203 --> 00:03:25,438
>> I DON'T WANT IT.

89
00:03:25,505 --> 00:03:28,541
OH! 2 POINTS!

90
00:03:28,608 --> 00:03:30,443
>> BUT HOW CAN YOU BE PREGNANT?

91
00:03:30,510 --> 00:03:33,212
YOU SAID YOU HAD A SPONGE IN
YOUR --

92
00:03:33,279 --> 00:03:34,847
OH, YOU MEANT ME.

93
00:03:34,914 --> 00:03:38,251
>> GEE, CASPER, I WISH WE COULD
PLAY WITH YOU FOREVER.

94
00:03:38,317 --> 00:03:41,621
>> YOU CAN!

95
00:03:41,688 --> 00:03:42,355
>> HEY, THERE.

96
00:03:42,422 --> 00:03:43,389
I'M BILLY -- BILLY JOEL.

97
00:03:43,456 --> 00:03:44,223
WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

98
00:03:44,290 --> 00:03:44,757
>> DAVY.

99
00:03:44,824 --> 00:03:45,758
>> AND WHAT DO YOU DO?

100
00:03:45,825 --> 00:03:46,692
>> I'M IN THE NAVY.

101
00:03:46,759 --> 00:03:48,561
>> HOW LONG WILL YOU DO THAT,
YOU THINK?

102
00:03:48,628 --> 00:03:49,696
>> UH, PROBABLY FOR LIFE.

103
00:03:49,762 --> 00:03:50,296
>> COOL.

104
00:03:50,363 --> 00:03:51,397
"DAVY" RHYMES WITH "NAVY."

105
00:03:51,464 --> 00:03:52,265
THAT'S CONVENIENT.

106
00:03:52,332 --> 00:03:53,066
>> WHAT?

107
00:03:53,132 --> 00:03:54,534
YOU BETTER NOT USE ME IN A SONG,
MAN.

108
00:03:54,601 --> 00:03:56,369
I'M ON THE RUN FROM A LOT OF
CREDITORS.

109
00:03:56,436 --> 00:03:58,805
>> NO PROBLEM, DAVY.

110
00:03:58,871 --> 00:04:03,276
[ GRUNTS ]
I HAVE ABSORBED YOUR STORY, MY

111
00:04:03,343 --> 00:04:04,510
FRIEND.

112
00:04:04,577 --> 00:04:07,814
AS THE ANCIENTS ATE THE HEARTS
OF LIONS TO GAIN THEIR STRENGTH,

113
00:04:07,880 --> 00:04:10,049
YOU ARE ONE WITH THE JOEL NOW!

114
00:04:10,116 --> 00:04:12,185
ONE WITH THE JOEL!

115
00:04:12,251 --> 00:04:14,253
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
>> LEAPIN' LIZARDS, MOLLY.

116
00:04:22,195 --> 00:04:24,163
IT SURE IS A HARD-KNOCK LIFE.

117
00:04:24,230 --> 00:04:26,165
>> ACTUALLY, WE'RE VERY LUCKY,
ANNIE.

118
00:04:26,232 --> 00:04:28,368
>> BEING AN ORPHAN SURE DON'T
FEEL LUCKY.

119
00:04:28,434 --> 00:04:31,471
>> THEN TRY BEING AN ORPHAN IN
THE PHILIPPINES, WHERE HUNDREDS

120
00:04:31,537 --> 00:04:34,474
OF THOUSANDS OF ORPHANS ARE
FORCED INTO PROSTITUTION, THANKS

121
00:04:34,540 --> 00:04:35,642
TO SEX TOURISM.

122
00:04:35,707 --> 00:04:38,778
IN AFRICA, AIDS HAS CREATED
MILLIONS OF ORPHANS WHO WON'T

123
00:04:38,845 --> 00:04:40,046
LIVE TO SEE PUBERTY.

124
00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:43,116
>> WELL...I SURE DON'T LIKE THAT
MEAN OLD MISS HANNIGAN.

125
00:04:43,182 --> 00:04:46,019
>> WHAT DON'T YOU LIKE,
EXACTLY -- THREE MEALS A DAY,

126
00:04:46,085 --> 00:04:48,788
A WARM BED, NOT BEING
HIV-POSITIVE, NOT PERFORMING

127
00:04:48,855 --> 00:04:51,290
FELLATIO ON FOREIGN BUSINESSMEN?

128
00:04:51,357 --> 00:04:52,625
THAT'S WHAT YOU DON'T LIKE?

129
00:04:52,692 --> 00:04:55,361
>> UH, I THINK I'M GONNA GO
SWEEP OVER THERE FOR A WHILE,

130
00:04:55,428 --> 00:04:57,296
MOLLY.

131
00:04:57,363 --> 00:04:59,832
GEE, PEPPER, MISS HANNIGAN SURE
IS MEAN.

132
00:04:59,899 --> 00:05:01,634
>> YEAH, I HATE THAT BITCH.

133
00:05:03,403 --> 00:05:05,705
>> WE SURE HAD A GRAND
ADVENTURE, ANNIE.

134
00:05:05,772 --> 00:05:08,875
YOUR QUICK WITS AND SPUNKY
CAN-DO SPIRIT SAVED US ALL.

135
00:05:08,941 --> 00:05:11,744
IS THERE ANYTHING MY LIMITLESS
POWER AND BILLIONS OF DOLLARS

136
00:05:11,811 --> 00:05:12,578
CAN DO FOR YOU?

137
00:05:12,645 --> 00:05:14,681
>> [ Echoing ] OVERSEAS
ORPHANS...

138
00:05:14,747 --> 00:05:16,816
FELLATIO ON FOREIGN
BUSINESSMEN...

139
00:05:16,883 --> 00:05:19,085
HIV AND AIDS...

140
00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:20,153
>> HMM...

141
00:05:20,219 --> 00:05:22,555
NOPE!

142
00:05:22,622 --> 00:05:28,828
[ WHIRRING ]
>> OH, NO, NO!

143
00:05:28,895 --> 00:05:30,296
AW, DAMN IT.

144
00:05:30,363 --> 00:05:32,865
I HAD IT. TOTALLY HAD IT.

145
00:05:32,932 --> 00:05:35,101
[ DIALING RAPIDLY ]
>> HEY, LARRY?

146
00:05:35,168 --> 00:05:35,868
IT'S DAVE.

147
00:05:35,935 --> 00:05:38,071
GET THIS -- I'M IN A PHONE
BOOTH.

148
00:05:38,137 --> 00:05:39,739
YEAH! YOU REMEMBER THOSE?

149
00:05:39,806 --> 00:05:41,207
I KNOW -- WEIRD, RIGHT?

150
00:05:41,274 --> 00:05:43,509
ALL RIGHT. SEE YOU LATER.

151
00:05:43,576 --> 00:05:46,112
[ RATTLING ]
>> AHOY!

152
00:05:46,179 --> 00:05:47,613
>> IS THAT MY PRINCE?

153
00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:49,382
OH, I KNEW YOU'D SAVE ME!

154
00:05:49,449 --> 00:05:51,017
>> STAND BACK, MY LOVE.

155
00:05:51,084 --> 00:05:52,752
WE WILL SOON BE TOGETHER.

156
00:05:52,819 --> 00:05:56,856
>> IT WON'T BE LONG NOW BEFORE
MY PRINCE TAKES ME IN HIS ARMS

157
00:05:56,923 --> 00:05:58,558
AND --
OW!

158
00:05:58,624 --> 00:06:00,226
CAREFUL, MY PRINCE.

159
00:06:00,293 --> 00:06:01,994
YOU ALMOST --
WHOA!

160
00:06:02,061 --> 00:06:04,530
[ CRUNCH! ]
AAH!

161
00:06:04,597 --> 00:06:06,099
OH, MY -- WHAT?

162
00:06:06,165 --> 00:06:07,500
IT'S RAINING GLASS!

163
00:06:07,567 --> 00:06:08,634
I'M BLIND!

164
00:06:08,701 --> 00:06:10,136
PLEASE STOP THROWING THE HOOK!

165
00:06:10,203 --> 00:06:13,206
OWWW!

166
00:06:13,272 --> 00:06:14,841
IS THAT YOU, MY PRINCE?

167
00:06:14,907 --> 00:06:16,442
>> I'M COMING, MY DEAR.

168
00:06:16,509 --> 00:06:18,678
[ GRUNTS ]
AHA!

169
00:06:18,745 --> 00:06:19,545
NOW HURRY, MY LOVE.

170
00:06:19,612 --> 00:06:21,280
WE DON'T HAVE MUCH T--
OH, GEEZ.

171
00:06:21,347 --> 00:06:23,015
YOU'RE NOT EVEN PACKED.

172
00:06:23,082 --> 00:06:24,984
>> NICE PLACE YOU GOT HERE,
POPS.

173
00:06:25,051 --> 00:06:27,887
YOU SHOULD PAY US FOR
PROTECTION -- MAKE SURE NOTHING

174
00:06:27,954 --> 00:06:29,122
HAPPENS TO IT.

175
00:06:29,188 --> 00:06:32,058
>> OH, I'VE GOT A POLICY WITH
ALLSTATE, SO I'M IN GOOD HANDS.

176
00:06:32,125 --> 00:06:32,859
>> OH, YEAH?

177
00:06:32,925 --> 00:06:35,194
YOU INSURED AGAINST THIS?

178
00:06:35,261 --> 00:06:36,829
>> YES, THAT'S IN THE POLICY.

179
00:06:36,896 --> 00:06:39,165
>> BUT NOW YOUR RATES WILL GO
UP, RIGHT?

180
00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:39,866
>> OH, NO!

181
00:06:39,932 --> 00:06:41,067
I CAN'T AFFORD THAT.

182
00:06:41,134 --> 00:06:44,070
>> [ LAUGHS ]
WE'LL BE BACK FOR OUR MONEY.

183
00:06:44,137 --> 00:06:46,572
HA HA HA -- BIG EXIT LAUGH.

184
00:06:46,639 --> 00:06:48,074
>> I HATE SMALL-BUSINESS OWNERS.

185
00:06:48,141 --> 00:06:50,843
>> OPERATOR, WHAT'S THE NAME OF
THOSE WAR CRIMINALS TURNED

186
00:06:50,909 --> 00:06:53,513
MERCENARY WHO GET PAID TO
PROTECT YOU FROM CRIMINALS WHO

187
00:06:53,579 --> 00:06:55,014
WANT TO GET PAID FOR PROTECTION?

188
00:06:55,081 --> 00:06:59,051
[ GASPS ]
OH, YEAH -- THE A-TEAM!

189
00:06:59,118 --> 00:07:00,153
HOW EXCITING.

190
00:07:00,219 --> 00:07:03,456
HANNIBAL, B.A. BARACUS, AND THE
WHOLE TEAM.

191
00:07:03,523 --> 00:07:05,458
>> NEGATORY ON THAT COMMUNIQUé,
CHIEF.

192
00:07:05,525 --> 00:07:07,794
YOUR CREDIT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH
FOR THE A-TEAM.

193
00:07:07,860 --> 00:07:10,396
WE ARE THE B-TEAM.

194
00:07:10,463 --> 00:07:15,034
[ FAST-PACED FUNK MUSIC PLAYS ]
G.D. -- GENERALLY DISPLEASED --

195
00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:15,802
BARABAS.

196
00:07:15,868 --> 00:07:17,336
>> BETTER NOT BE RIDING NO
TRAINS.

197
00:07:17,403 --> 00:07:18,805
I LIKE DRINKING MY APPLE JUICE.

198
00:07:18,871 --> 00:07:20,072
>> NOAH "ASSMAN" HATHAWAY.

199
00:07:20,139 --> 00:07:21,908
>> CHARMS AND KISSES FROM ME TO
YOU.

200
00:07:21,974 --> 00:07:24,544
>> PLAYED BOXEY ON THE ORIGINAL
"BATTLESTAR GALACTICA."

201
00:07:24,610 --> 00:07:27,814
CAPTAIN F.N. -- [BLEEP] NUTS --
MADLOCK.

202
00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:30,349
>> PLE-E-E-E-ASE MAKE MY
MEMORIES GO AWAY.

203
00:07:30,416 --> 00:07:31,751
>> AND I'M HANDY BALL.

204
00:07:31,818 --> 00:07:34,020
GOT THAT HANDLE UNDERCOVER IN
HANOI.

205
00:07:34,086 --> 00:07:35,855
DON'T ASK WHY, AND I WON'T TELL.

206
00:07:35,922 --> 00:07:38,257
>> GOOD GOLLY, WHAT IS
THE C-TEAM LIKE?

207
00:07:38,324 --> 00:07:41,561
>> A BUNCH OF SURLY MIDGETS.

208
00:07:41,627 --> 00:07:44,397
[ TIRES SCREECHING ]
[ CLATTER ]

209
00:07:44,463 --> 00:07:47,400
HERE'S THE DEAL, BOYS -- YOU
LEAVE TOWN AND MY FRIEND HERE

210
00:07:47,466 --> 00:07:50,503
DOESN'T CHANGE YOUR ZIP CODE TO
ZERO-ZERO-ZERO-MY NOSE IS

211
00:07:50,570 --> 00:07:51,237
BROKEN.

212
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:53,239
>> I GOT SYMPATHY FOR THAT
CARD.

213
00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:54,006
GRRRR!

214
00:07:54,073 --> 00:07:57,143
>> UH, G-GIVE US JUST A SEC,
HERE.

215
00:07:57,210 --> 00:07:59,879
[ LOCK ENGAGES ]
>> DAMN IT! THEY TRICKED US!

216
00:07:59,946 --> 00:08:01,080
>> I CAN'T TAKE IT!

217
00:08:01,147 --> 00:08:06,986
[ SHIVERING ]
>> ARE YOU THINKING WHAT I'M

218
00:08:07,053 --> 00:08:08,154
THINKING?

219
00:08:08,221 --> 00:08:10,323
>> I LOVE IT WHEN A PLAN'S GONNA
COME TOGETHER EVENTUALLY.

220
00:08:10,389 --> 00:08:11,123
>> LET'S DO IT.

221
00:08:11,190 --> 00:08:13,960
>> I LIKE USING BIG TOOLS.

222
00:08:14,026 --> 00:08:16,662
>> [ SHIVERING ]
>> [ COUGHING ]

223
00:08:20,332 --> 00:08:21,000
>> OOH.

224
00:08:21,067 --> 00:08:22,869
DEAD FROM CARBON MONOXIDE.

225
00:08:22,935 --> 00:08:24,036
>> OH. OH, MY GOSH.

226
00:08:24,103 --> 00:08:26,472
THIS IS THE WORST THING I'VE
SEEN SINCE THAT OLD BAR OWNER

227
00:08:26,539 --> 00:08:28,174
WAS BEATEN TO DEATH EARLIER
TODAY.

228
00:08:28,241 --> 00:08:29,842
>> DAVE, CHECK THIS OUT.

229
00:08:29,909 --> 00:08:33,246
[ FAST-PACED FUNK MUSIC PLAYS ]
>> OOH. TAKE THEIR TAPE.

230
00:08:33,312 --> 00:08:38,084
[ "PIANO MAN"-STYLE TUNE PLAYS ]
>> ♪ PETE IS A REAL-ESTATE

231
00:08:38,150 --> 00:08:39,784
NOVELIST ♪
>> HEY, THAT'S ME!

232
00:08:39,852 --> 00:08:42,421
>> ♪ THAT'S A CUTE WAY OF SAYING
PETE'S BROKE ♪

233
00:08:42,488 --> 00:08:43,623
>> WHAT?

234
00:08:43,688 --> 00:08:46,525
>> ♪ I'LL LAUGH AT HIS LIFE
WHILE I'M HUMPING HIS WIFE ♪

235
00:08:46,592 --> 00:08:47,493
>> SHEILA?

236
00:08:47,560 --> 00:08:49,896
>> ♪ 'CAUSE PETE'S TINY SCHLONG
IS A JOKE ♪

237
00:08:49,962 --> 00:08:52,632
>> [ GASPS ]
>> ♪ MY PIANO, IT SOUNDS LIKE

238
00:08:52,698 --> 00:08:56,269
GOD'S SYMPHONY ♪
♪ AND MY MICROPHONE SMELLS LIKE

239
00:08:56,335 --> 00:09:00,273
THE POOR ♪
♪ THEY PUT BREAD IN MY CUP, AND

240
00:09:00,339 --> 00:09:02,074
THEIR LIVES ALL SUCK ♪
>> HUH?

241
00:09:02,141 --> 00:09:03,876
>> ♪ IF I QUIT THIS GIG, THEY'D
LOSE ALL INTEREST IN LIVING,

242
00:09:03,943 --> 00:09:05,311
SINCE LIFE WOULD HAVE NO
MEANING, AND THEY'D BLOW THEIR

243
00:09:05,378 --> 00:09:11,317
BRAINS OUT ONTO THE FLOO-O-O-R ♪
♪ LA, DA, DE-DA-DA ♪

244
00:09:11,384 --> 00:09:15,454
[ GUN COCKS ]
♪ LA, DE-DE, DA-LE-DA ♪

245
00:09:15,521 --> 00:09:19,191
♪ DOWN ON YOUR KNEES, I'M THE
PIANO GOD ♪

246
00:09:19,258 --> 00:09:23,029
♪ PRAY TO THE SONGS THAT I'VE
SUNG ♪

247
00:09:23,095 --> 00:09:26,265
♪ TELL ME I'M TOO GOOD TO WORK
HERE ♪

248
00:09:26,332 --> 00:09:32,405
♪ THEN PUT MY BALLS RIGHT ON
YOUR TONGUE ♪

249
00:09:32,471 --> 00:09:33,940
GREAT -- ALL SINGLES.

250
00:09:34,006 --> 00:09:35,141
>> HEY, JOEL...

251
00:09:35,207 --> 00:09:35,942
HYAH!

252
00:09:36,008 --> 00:09:42,048
>> [ GRUNTING ]
>> [ LAUGHS ]

253
00:09:42,114 --> 00:09:43,349
WHEW!

254
00:09:43,415 --> 00:09:44,350
YEAH...

255
00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:47,753
[ CELLPHONE CHIRPS ]
>> Pete, this is your agent.

256
00:09:47,820 --> 00:09:49,422
The publishers loved your novel.

257
00:09:49,488 --> 00:09:51,757
Time to quit the real-estate
biz, brother.

258
00:09:51,824 --> 00:09:54,894
Oh, by the way -- the hospital
called, and your wife died of

259
00:09:54,961 --> 00:09:55,628
crotch rot.

260
00:09:55,695 --> 00:09:59,398
[ Inhales sharply ]
Sorry, man.

261
00:09:59,465 --> 00:10:03,269
>> POETIC JUSTICE!!

262
00:10:03,336 --> 00:10:05,504
>> ♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪

263
00:10:05,571 --> 00:10:07,640
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK-A-WAWK WAWK
BAWK BAWK ♪

264
00:10:07,707 --> 00:10:09,775
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪

265
00:10:09,842 --> 00:10:11,911
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK-A-WAWK WAWK
BAWK BAWK ♪

266
00:10:11,978 --> 00:10:14,080
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪

267
00:10:14,146 --> 00:10:16,248
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK-A-WAWK WAWK
BAWK BAWK ♪

268
00:10:16,315 --> 00:10:18,317
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK ♪

269
00:10:18,384 --> 00:10:20,486
♪ BA-BAWK BAWK BAWK-A-WAWK WAWK
BAWK BAWK ♪

270
00:10:20,553 --> 00:10:22,722
BA-GAWK! BAWK.

271
00:10:24,890 --> 00:10:25,992
>> WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?

272
00:10:26,058 --> 00:10:27,893
>> NICK FURY, DIRECTOR OF
S.H.I.E.L.D.

273
00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:30,463
I'M HERE TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT
THE AVENGERS INITIATIVE.

274
00:10:30,529 --> 00:10:31,263
>> IN MY HOUSE?

275
00:10:31,330 --> 00:10:32,565
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT?

276
00:10:32,631 --> 00:10:35,835
[ FLOORBOARD CREAKS ]
AND WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?

277
00:10:35,901 --> 00:10:37,737
>> RUN, STUPID!

278
00:10:37,803 --> 00:10:39,138
[ THUD ]