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ROBOT CHICKEN 35 "THE MUNNERY"
[CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY

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TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP]
[TOOLS WHIRRING]

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>> IT'S ALIVE!

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>> HEH HEH HEH HEH!

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>> MOM! I FOUND DAD!

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>> THE UNITED STATES NAVY,
BATTLING A NEW FOE--

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LOW RECRUITMENT.

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SO REMEMBER "DON'T ASK,
DON'T TELL"?

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NOW WE'RE MORE "DON'T ASK"
THAN EVER BEFORE.

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WHEN THEY WRITE YOUR LIFE STORY,
WILL ANYONE WANT TO READ IT?

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THEN PUT A CHAPTER IN THERE
ABOUT HAVING SEX WITH A MAN

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ON A SUBMARINE.

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THAT WOULD BE A NEAT BOOK.

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BOOYAH. THE NAVY.

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>> KNEEL BEFORE ZOD.

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LAY DOWN ON YOUR BACKS
BEFORE ZOD.

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NOW, USING YOUR LOWER
ABDOMINALS, RAISE YOUR LEGS AND

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HOLD ON A 5-COUNT BEFORE ZOD.

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1 BEFORE ZOD, 2 BEFORE ZOD,
3 BEFORE ZOD...

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>> THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME.

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THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME.

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THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE--
[WIND BLOWING]

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>> OH, CRAP!

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THIS ISN'T WHAT I MEANT.

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>> WELL, TAN MY HIDE.

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LOOK WHO'S COME HOME.

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DWAYNE, GET ON OUT HERE
AND SEE WHAT THE CAT DRUG IN.

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>> WHY, RITA, I--
AW! MY LITTLE GIRL

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HAS FINALLY COME BACK TO ME.

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[SNIFFS]
YOU LOOK GOOD, CHILD.

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>> THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE
AUNTIE EM AND UNCLE HENRY'S.

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THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE
AUNTIE EM AND UNCLE HENRY'S.

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>> COMING THIS FALL
FROM THE CREATORS OF "MONK,"

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EVERYONE'S PARENTS' FAVORITE
OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DETECTIVE,

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COMES "CORK," AMERICA'S FIRST
MENTALLY CHALLENGED

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CRIME SLEUTH.

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>> IT'S ANICA DORSEY,
THE BANK TELLER.

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WE'RE ALL OUT OF LEADS, CORK.

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WHAT DO YOU MAKE
OF THE SITUATION?

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>> HA HA! I'M A TORNADO!

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I'M A TORNADO! HA HA HA!

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[CRYING LOUDLY]
>> IT'S A WEDDING BAND.

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THIS YOUNG MAN JUST FOUND
OUR FIRST CLUE.

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>> GOOD JOB, CORK.

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>> NO MORE GYM CLASS.

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[STAMMERING]
>> WHAT IS IT, CORK?

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>> [STAMMERING]
>> IS IT A WIDOW AND HER

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BOYFRIEND TRYING TO CASH IN
ON HER LATE HUSBAND'S

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INSURANCE POLICY?

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>> NAH.

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>> IS IT A GANG OF OLD POKER
BUDDIES WHO DECIDED

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TO KNOCK OVER A CASINO
FOR ONE LAST SHOT AT FORTUNE?

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>> NAH.

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>> DO YOU HAVE TO GO NUMBER-ONE?

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>> YEAH!

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>> OK. TAKE MY HAND.

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NO MORE SODA FOR YOU TODAY, OK?

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HE'S GETTING AWAY!

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>> [STAMMERING]
>> YOU WANT TO GO FASTER, CORK?

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>> OK.

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[ENGINE REVS]
[TIRES SCREECHING]

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>> [CHEERING]
>> LOUD NOISES. NO NOISES.

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>> YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME
ALIVE, CORK.

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ONE MOVE, AND YOUR PRECIOUS
VOLUNTEER BIG SISTER IS GONNA

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HAVE A BULLET IN HER HEAD!

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>> CORK, DO SOMETHING!

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>> BOOBIES. HA HA HA.

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>> CORK, QUICK! THE BAD MAN
TOOK YOUR STRETCH ARMSTRONG!

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>> NO!

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>> OW! OW! OW! OW!

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>> MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE!

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MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE!

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>> CORK, THAT'S ENOUGH.

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CORK, THAT'S ENOUGH.

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CORK.

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>> MINE! MINE!

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>> CORK, THANKS TO YOUR
UNFLAPPABLE ENTHUSIASM

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AND SURPRISINGLY HANDY
CAPABLE STRENGTHS, THIS CITY

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OWES YOU A GREAT DEBT.

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AS A TOKEN OF OUR GRATITUDE,
YOU MAY NOW PICK OUT ONE TOY

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AT THE TOY STORE.

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>> I WANT SPAGHETTI.

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>> AAH!

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>> RELEASE THE DRAGON.

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>> AAH! AAH! AAH! AAH!

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>> I'M FREE. I'M FREE!

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OH, MY GOD!

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IT'S ALL SO BEAUTIFUL.

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I HONESTLY THOUGHT
I WOULD NEVER GET OUT.

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>> AAH!

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>> ♪ HEARTBREAK, IN THE MORNING
THERE'S HEARTBREAK

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MY KITTENS HAVE LEFT ME
AND THE FLOWERS ARE DEAD

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I HEAR LAUGHTER
BUT NEVER FOR ME

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NO, I'M ALONE
DUST AND REFUSE

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FILLS MY SOUL
SORROW

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EVERY MOMENT IS TORMENT
I CAN'T RECALL SUNSHINE

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00:05:03,302 --> 00:05:11,077
AND ALL COLORS ARE GRAY
IN THE MIRROR

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I BEG FOR RELEASE
AND HEAR ITS SWEET CALL

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WHEN THE GATES OPEN
I WALK SLOWLY IN ♪

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>> IT'S JUST LIKE ANDY
ALWAYS TOLD ME--

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GET BUSY DYING, OR GET KRAKEN.

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>> I GOT NO BRAKES!

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>> ♪ FACES FILLED
WITH JOY AND CHEER

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WHAT A MAGICAL TIME OF YEAR
HOWDY HO

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IT'S WEASEL STOMPING DAY
NOW PUT YOUR VIKING HELMET ON

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SPREAD THAT MAYONNAISE
ON THE LAWN

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DON'T YOU KNOW
IT'S WEASEL STOMPING DAY?

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WEASEL STOMPING DAY
ALL THE LITTLE GIRLS AND BOYS

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LOVE THAT WONDERFUL
CRUNCHING NOISE

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YOU'LL KNOW WHAT
THIS DAY'S ABOUT

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WHEN YOU STOMP
A WEASEL'S GUTS RIGHT OUT

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SO COME ALONG AND HAVE A LAUGH
STOMP THEIR WEASELY

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SPINES IN HALF
GRAB YOUR BOOTS

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AND STOMP YOUR CARES AWAY
HIP HIP HOORAY

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IT'S WEASEL STOMPING DAY ♪
[WEASELS SQUEALING]

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IT'S WEASEL STOMPING DAY ♪
[WEASELS SQUEALING]

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♪ PEOPLE UP AND DOWN THE STREET
CRUSHING WEASELS

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BENEATH THEIR FEET
WHY WE DO IT, WHO CAN SAY?

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BUT IT'S SUCH A FESTIVE HOLIDAY
SO LET THE STOMPING FUN BEGIN

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BASH THEIR WEASELY
SKULLS RIGHT IN

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IT'S TRADITION
THAT MAKES IT OK

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HEY, EVERYONE,
IT'S WEASEL STOMPING

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WE'LL HAVE SOME FUN
ON WEASEL STOMPING

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PUT DOWN YOUR GUN
IT'S WEASEL STOMPING DAY

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HIP HIP HOORAY
IT'S WEASEL STOMPING DAY ♪

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>> WEASEL STOMPING DAY.

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>> HEY!

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>> WELL, HERE WE ARE,
FACE TO FACE.

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>> STARLIGHT, STAR BRIGHT,
FIRST STAR I SEE TONIGHT,

130
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I WISH I MAY, I WISH I MIGHT
HAVE THIS WISH I WISH TONIGHT.

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I WISH--
[RUMBLING]

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HOLY CRAP!

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I-I-I GOT TO TELL OSCAR.

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OSCAR!

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OSCAR! OSCAR!

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>> AAH!

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>> HEY, OSCAR, IT'S ME--KEVIN.

138
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>> OH, WHAT HAPPENED?

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>> I MADE A WISH ON THAT STAR.

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[RUMBLING]
>> DUDE, WE GOT TO TELL JIMMY.

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00:07:45,798 --> 00:07:48,568
>> DUDES, WE'VE GOT
TO TELL LOUIS.

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>> LOUIS. HEY. HEY, LOUIS.

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>> [GASP]
>> MAKE A WISH. IT'LL COME TRUE.

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[RUMBLING]
>> A GIANT SQUID? YOU IDIOT.

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00:07:58,878 --> 00:08:00,646
WE'RE NOT EVEN NEAR WATER.

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00:08:00,713 --> 00:08:04,116
>> AW, CRAP! SORRY, GUYS.

147
00:08:04,183 --> 00:08:06,586
LET'S GO TELL TIMMY.

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>> EW!

149
00:08:08,487 --> 00:08:09,856
>> TIMMY! HEY, TIMMY!

150
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USE YOUR LASER CANNON
TO WAKE HIM UP.

151
00:08:12,558 --> 00:08:13,759
>> I HAVE A LASER CANNON?

152
00:08:13,826 --> 00:08:21,200
>> ALL GIANT ROBOTS
HAVE LASER CANNONS. DUH!

153
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>> HOLY CRAP!

154
00:08:22,535 --> 00:08:24,637
I HAVE A LASER CANNON!

155
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>> TIMMY! TIMMY! MAKE A WISH,
AND IT'LL COME TRUE.

156
00:08:29,041 --> 00:08:30,309
>> TIMMY?

157
00:08:30,376 --> 00:08:32,111
>> HEY, LET'S GO GET ZACH.

158
00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:34,447
>> ZACH, WAKE UP! WAKE UP, ZACH!

159
00:08:34,513 --> 00:08:41,254
>> MAKE A WISH,
AND IT'LL COME TRUE.

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>> JERKS.

161
00:08:42,421 --> 00:08:44,490
IT'S 3:00 IN THE MORNING.

162
00:08:44,557 --> 00:08:45,758
>> WANT TO PLAY DOCTOR?

163
00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:48,261
>> I DON'T HAVE INSURANCE.

164
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>> REPORT, MR. SCOTT.

165
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>> CAPTAIN, SOMEBODY TRADED
ALL OUR DILITHIUM CRYSTALS

166
00:08:54,967 --> 00:09:00,573
FOR PORNOGRAPHIC HOLOGRAMS.

167
00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:01,540
>> AND?

168
00:09:01,607 --> 00:09:03,876
>> WITH NO POWER,
ALL LIFE SUPPORT ON THE SHIP

169
00:09:03,943 --> 00:09:05,645
IS ABOUT TO FAIL.

170
00:09:05,711 --> 00:09:06,779
>> AND?

171
00:09:06,846 --> 00:09:09,015
>> OUR ONLY HOPE IS TO BEAM
DOWN TO THE NEAREST PLANET,

172
00:09:09,081 --> 00:09:12,318
BUT THERE IS ONLY ENOUGH POWER
TO SEND 5 PEOPLE.

173
00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:13,619
I CAN'T DO NO MORE.

174
00:09:13,686 --> 00:09:17,290
>> CAPTAIN, LOGIC DICTATES THAT
EACH OF THE 433 CREW MEMBERS--

175
00:09:17,356 --> 00:09:19,492
>> HEY! WHERE DID KIRK GO?

176
00:09:19,558 --> 00:09:22,094
OH, NO, HE DIDN'T.

177
00:09:22,161 --> 00:09:23,629
>> NO FAIR, JIM!

178
00:09:23,696 --> 00:09:27,266
>> NAH NAH NAH! YOINK!

179
00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:31,504
>> NOW THERE'S ONLY ENOUGH POWER
FOR 4 OF US TO BEAM OUT!

180
00:09:31,570 --> 00:09:32,571
>> I'M A DOCTOR.

181
00:09:32,638 --> 00:09:34,140
I HAVE TO GO.

182
00:09:34,206 --> 00:09:40,179
>> [OTHERS AGREEING]
>> UM...I HAVE A VAGINA.

183
00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:42,982
>> [OTHERS AGREEING]
>> A VAGINA COULD PROVE

184
00:09:43,049 --> 00:09:45,518
QUITE USEFUL.

185
00:09:45,584 --> 00:09:46,919
>> I'M TOBY, THE REDSHIRT.

186
00:09:46,986 --> 00:09:48,387
YOU NEED A REDSHIRT.

187
00:09:48,454 --> 00:09:49,889
YOU JUST DO.

188
00:09:49,956 --> 00:09:50,823
>> QUITE LOGICAL.

189
00:09:50,890 --> 00:09:53,326
>> SURE.

190
00:09:53,392 --> 00:09:56,429
ONLY ONE OF US
CAN GO, OLD FRIEND.

191
00:09:56,495 --> 00:09:58,731
>> WE SHALL HANDLE THIS
THE ONLY LOGICAL WAY.

192
00:09:58,798 --> 00:10:00,466
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!

193
00:10:00,533 --> 00:10:05,071
>> DID YOU JUST TRY
THE VULCAN NERVE PINCH ON ME?

194
00:10:05,137 --> 00:10:06,672
>> NO.

195
00:10:06,739 --> 00:10:12,578
>> OOH! MY EYE!

196
00:10:12,645 --> 00:10:21,253
[ALARM BLARING]
>> OH, SNAP. IT LOOKS LIKE

197
00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:24,623
WE GOT SOME SORT OF DONNER PARTY
SITUATION UP IN HERE.

198
00:10:24,690 --> 00:10:25,658
>> DAMN IT, JIM.

199
00:10:25,725 --> 00:10:28,995
I'M A DOCTOR, NOT A--
>> A CANNIBAL. YES, WE KNOW.

200
00:10:29,061 --> 00:10:32,264
>> AM I REALLY THAT PREDICTABLE?

201
00:10:32,331 --> 00:10:33,733
>> CHAIN OF COMMAND, PEOPLE.

202
00:10:33,799 --> 00:10:35,534
SO I GUESS WE START BY EATING...

203
00:10:35,601 --> 00:10:38,170
LET'S SEE...

204
00:10:38,237 --> 00:10:40,039
>> AW, HELL, NO.

205
00:10:40,106 --> 00:10:41,207
YOU KNOW WHAT?

206
00:10:41,273 --> 00:10:42,708
[BEEP] ALL Y'ALL.

207
00:10:42,775 --> 00:10:44,076
>> IT IS YOUR DUTY.

208
00:10:44,143 --> 00:10:45,444
>> SCREW THAT!

209
00:10:45,511 --> 00:10:48,347
ON BEHALF OF ALL THE REDSHIRTS
THAT FELL BEFORE ME,

210
00:10:48,414 --> 00:10:52,451
IT MAKES ME VERY, VERY PROUD
TO SPEAK THE FOLLOWING SENTENCE.

211
00:10:52,518 --> 00:10:55,888
[INHALES DEEPLY]
I'M THE ONLY ONE

212
00:10:55,955 --> 00:10:57,523
THAT BROUGHT A GUN.

213
00:10:57,590 --> 00:10:59,025
>> UH-OH.

214
00:10:59,091 --> 00:11:06,298
[PHASER FIRING]
>> MMM! THAT'S GOOD HAM.

215
00:11:06,365 --> 00:11:10,169
[CHICKENS CLUCKING]
[CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY

216
00:11:10,236 --> 00:11:12,938
TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP]
[CAPTIONED BY NATIONAL

217
00:11:13,005 --> 00:11:14,006
CAPTIONING INSTITUTE
--www.ncicap.org--]