1
00:00:17,517 --> 00:00:20,153
IT'S ALIVE!

2
00:00:40,373 --> 00:00:42,942
DO YOU MIND?

3
00:00:50,483 --> 00:00:52,352
I-16.

4
00:00:52,419 --> 00:00:54,387
COWA-BINGO, DUDES!

5
00:00:54,454 --> 00:00:56,489
♪ SENIOR MUTANT NINJA TURTLES ♪

6
00:00:56,556 --> 00:00:59,592
♪ SENIOR MUTANT NINJA TURTLES ♪

7
00:00:59,659 --> 00:01:02,695
♪ SENIOR MUTANT NINJA TURTLES ♪

8
00:01:02,762 --> 00:01:04,330
♪ MUTANTS IN A WHEELCHAIR ♪

9
00:01:04,397 --> 00:01:07,333
DUDE, THIS PRUNE PIZZA
IS BODACIOUS.

10
00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:11,704
OH, NO, I JUST
COWABUNGA'D
IN MY PANTS.

11
00:01:11,771 --> 00:01:12,939
BARF-A-ROONEY!

12
00:01:13,006 --> 00:01:15,575
I HOPE YOU'RE WEARING
ADULT UNDERGARMENTS.

13
00:01:15,642 --> 00:01:16,509
ARE YOU?

14
00:01:16,576 --> 00:01:17,477
IT DEPENDS.

15
00:01:17,544 --> 00:01:20,045
♪ SENIOR MUTANT NINJA TURTLES ♪

16
00:01:20,113 --> 00:01:22,081
♪ HEROES WEARING DIAPERS ♪

17
00:01:22,148 --> 00:01:24,283
DUDES, WHERE'S
SPLINTER?

18
00:01:24,350 --> 00:01:25,952
HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

19
00:01:26,019 --> 00:01:27,887
LOOKING FOR SHREDDER.
NO, NOT HERE.

20
00:01:27,954 --> 00:01:30,190
♪ SENIOR MUTANT NINJA TURTLES ♪

21
00:01:30,256 --> 00:01:31,890
♪ HEROES TOUCHING NURSES ♪

22
00:01:31,958 --> 00:01:34,227
LOOK WHAT I FOUND
IN MY OLD STUFF --

23
00:01:34,294 --> 00:01:35,995
MY OLD SKATEBOARD!

24
00:01:36,062 --> 00:01:38,531
DUDE, LET ME SEE THAT!

25
00:01:38,598 --> 00:01:40,633
COWABUNGA!

26
00:01:40,700 --> 00:01:43,803
♪ SENIOR MUTANT NINJA TURTLES ♪

27
00:01:43,870 --> 00:01:47,073
♪ DEALING WITH LIFE CHANGES ♪

28
00:01:47,140 --> 00:01:48,775
I THINK YOU'LL ENJOY

29
00:01:48,842 --> 00:01:50,743
"MILLION DOLLAR BABY,"
MISS DUNST.

30
00:01:50,810 --> 00:01:52,378
YEAH, I HEAR
REALLY GOOD THINGS --

31
00:01:52,445 --> 00:01:55,348
MY FAVORITE PART IS
WHEN HILARY SWANK
GETS PARALYZED

32
00:01:55,414 --> 00:01:57,884
AND CLINT EASTWOOD TAKES
HER OFF LIFE SUPPORT.

33
00:01:57,951 --> 00:01:59,252
THANKS.

34
00:01:59,319 --> 00:02:01,354
AAH!
HEE HEE!

35
00:02:01,421 --> 00:02:04,457
ACCORDING TO MY SPIDEY SENSE,
YOU OWE ME A KISS!

36
00:02:04,524 --> 00:02:06,759
GET IT?
IT'S LIKE THE MOVIE

37
00:02:06,826 --> 00:02:09,262
THAT YOU WERE IN.

38
00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:13,867
HEY, BUDDY.
ARE YOU OKAY?

39
00:02:13,933 --> 00:02:17,403
HEY, CAN YOU
HEAR ME?

40
00:02:17,470 --> 00:02:19,405
BUDDY?

41
00:02:19,472 --> 00:02:22,942
DUDE.

42
00:02:25,978 --> 00:02:27,947
I TOLD YOU
IT WOULD BE SPECIAL.

43
00:02:28,014 --> 00:02:29,782
WELL, WE'RE GOING
DOWN THE RIVER ON THIS ONE,

44
00:02:29,849 --> 00:02:31,551
THOUGH THE ODDS OF THAT
INSIDE STRAIGHT ARE--

45
00:02:31,618 --> 00:02:33,753
OH, AND THERE'S HIS TELL!
THAT'LL COST HIM.

46
00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:36,055
Announcer: THERE'S
A NEW DETECTIVE CLEANING UP

47
00:02:36,122 --> 00:02:37,790
THE STREETS OF SAN FRANCISCO.

48
00:02:37,857 --> 00:02:40,994
THIS FALL,
RICK SCHROEDER IS...

49
00:02:41,060 --> 00:02:44,030
WITH THE HELP OF HIS
FAITHFUL DRIVER, TAN WANG.

50
00:02:44,097 --> 00:02:46,366
Man on radio: RICKY,
WE'VE GOT A ROBBERY ON MARKET.

51
00:02:46,432 --> 00:02:50,537
IT'S RICK.
TAN WANG, LET'S ROLL.

52
00:02:50,870 --> 00:02:53,339
TAN WANG, THE NOISE!

53
00:02:53,406 --> 00:02:55,408
DAMN IT, WANG, THE NOISE!

54
00:02:55,475 --> 00:02:57,810
WOOOOOO! WOOOOOOO!

55
00:02:57,877 --> 00:03:01,314
NO CROOK CAN ESCAPE
SHAW'S WHEELS OF STEEL.

56
00:03:01,381 --> 00:03:04,517
OH, I'M NOT DONE
WITH YOU YET, PUNK.

57
00:03:04,584 --> 00:03:06,819
WANG, THROW IT
IN REVERSE.

58
00:03:06,886 --> 00:03:11,124
BEEP, BEEP, BEEP.

59
00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:16,563
DON'T LOOK DOWN!

60
00:03:16,629 --> 00:03:19,666
WHOO-HOO!

61
00:03:19,732 --> 00:03:21,200
HOLD ON TIGHT!

62
00:03:21,267 --> 00:03:23,102
DETECTIVE RICK SHAW!

63
00:03:23,169 --> 00:03:25,538
WE LIKE ACTION MOVIES.
THEY'RE REALLY FUN.

64
00:03:25,605 --> 00:03:27,307
THEN, AFTER THE MOVIE,
WE COME HOME

65
00:03:27,373 --> 00:03:29,108
AND I LIKE TO TURN
MY WIFE UPSIDE DOWN

66
00:03:29,175 --> 00:03:30,843
AND STICK A BANANA,
AN APPLE, HANDI-SNACKS,

67
00:03:30,910 --> 00:03:33,279
AND A STICK OF STRING CHEESE
IN HER, LIKE THIS.

68
00:03:33,346 --> 00:03:35,281
[ GIGGLES ]

69
00:03:35,348 --> 00:03:36,583
[ MOANING ]

70
00:03:36,649 --> 00:03:38,817
WE LIKED JACKASS THE MOVIE
'CAUSE WE LIKE PRANKS.

71
00:03:38,885 --> 00:03:40,887
SOMETIMES I FILL UP BILLY HERE
WITH HORSE CRAP,

72
00:03:40,954 --> 00:03:43,055
LIGHT HIM ON FIRE, PUT HIM
ON THE NEIGHBORS PORCH,

73
00:03:43,122 --> 00:03:45,358
RING THE DOORBELL,
AND THEY STOMP HIM OUT.

74
00:03:45,425 --> 00:03:48,194
THEIR SHOES SMELL
LIKE HORSE POO.

75
00:03:48,261 --> 00:03:50,730
YO, YO, YO, DAWG, WHAT WAS
THE LAST MOVIE WE SAW?

76
00:03:50,797 --> 00:03:52,265
SENSE AND SENSIBILITY,
KID.

77
00:03:52,332 --> 00:03:54,033
YEAH, THAT JOINT WAS
HOT TO DEATH, SON.

78
00:03:54,100 --> 00:03:57,136
YEAH, WE SNEAKED SOME
40s UP IN THAT BITCH,

79
00:03:57,203 --> 00:03:59,238
LIKE THIS.

80
00:03:59,305 --> 00:04:01,774
SOMETIMES I GO
TO SCARY MOVIES MIT HANS

81
00:04:01,841 --> 00:04:04,444
AND I GET VERY NERVOUS
AND START TO HYPERVENTILATE,

82
00:04:04,510 --> 00:04:08,147
SO I BLOW IN AND OUT OF HANS,
LIKE ZIS.

83
00:04:10,917 --> 00:04:13,086
HANS!!!

84
00:04:13,152 --> 00:04:14,320
FAN-DINGO.COM --

85
00:04:14,387 --> 00:04:17,457
WHY NOT ADD A DOLLAR TO
THE PRICE OF YOUR MOVIE TICKET?

86
00:04:20,660 --> 00:04:22,996
YOU SUCK, SCOTT NORWOOD!

87
00:04:23,062 --> 00:04:25,632
YOU [BEEP] JERK.

88
00:04:26,366 --> 00:04:27,800
[ GIGGLING ]

89
00:04:27,867 --> 00:04:30,737
OH, GIRLS, GROW UP.

90
00:06:04,897 --> 00:06:06,432
OOH!

91
00:06:06,499 --> 00:06:09,969
DID YOU SAY YOUR
PRAYERS, TIMMY?
I SURE DID, MOM!

92
00:06:10,036 --> 00:06:12,071
GOOD BOY, SON.
SLEEP TIGHT.

93
00:06:12,138 --> 00:06:14,540
UH, DAD,
IS THE CAT OUTSIDE?

94
00:06:14,607 --> 00:06:16,375
YES, HE IS, TIMMY.

95
00:06:16,442 --> 00:06:19,512
[sighs]
GOOD.

96
00:06:54,547 --> 00:06:56,149
AAAAAAH! AAAAAHH!

97
00:06:56,215 --> 00:06:57,250
WHAT IS IT, SON?

98
00:06:57,316 --> 00:07:00,419
I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU
TO GET THE [BEEP]
OUTTA HERE!

99
00:07:00,486 --> 00:07:02,088
STUPID CAT!

100
00:07:02,155 --> 00:07:06,259
Computer: I DON'T LIKE IT
WHEN YOU TOUCH ME LIKE THAT.

101
00:07:08,161 --> 00:07:11,030
EXCUSE ME,
WHAT YEAR IS THIS?

102
00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:13,800
UH, 2006?

103
00:07:13,866 --> 00:07:15,768
2006?

104
00:07:15,835 --> 00:07:17,870
[chuckles]
OH, MAN.

105
00:07:17,937 --> 00:07:20,306
GOOD LUCK,
BUDDY!

106
00:07:26,212 --> 00:07:27,446
B-RABBIT, YOU'RE ON!

107
00:07:27,513 --> 00:07:31,150
EHH, I TOLD YOU, DAFFY,
MY NAME IS BUGS.

108
00:07:31,217 --> 00:07:34,453
NO, YOUR M.C. NAME
IS B-RABBIT.

109
00:07:34,520 --> 00:07:36,222
WE'VE GOTTA APPEAL
TO TODAY'S KIDS.

110
00:07:36,289 --> 00:07:40,893
NO LONGER LOONEY TUNES,
WE'RE LIZZOONEY TIZZUNES.

111
00:07:40,960 --> 00:07:43,663
REAL HIP-HOP, DAWG.

112
00:07:44,730 --> 00:07:46,766
SUFFERIN' SUCCOTASH!

113
00:07:46,832 --> 00:07:48,901
EHH, I'M NERVOUS, DAFFY!

114
00:07:48,968 --> 00:07:51,470
LISTEN, BROTHER,
YOU GOTTA GET OUT THERE!

115
00:07:51,537 --> 00:07:53,239
AND DON'T CHOKE AGAIN!

116
00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:55,575
EHH, WHICH WAY IS THE STAGE?

117
00:07:55,641 --> 00:07:57,710
JUST LOOK AT THE SIGN.

118
00:07:57,777 --> 00:08:00,613
GET READY FOR THE RAP BATTLE
OF THE CENTURY.

119
00:08:00,680 --> 00:08:05,218
FIRST, LET'S HAVE A HAND
FOR DJ BACON BITS.

120
00:08:05,284 --> 00:08:06,953
P-P-P-P-PUT YOUR HANDS
IN THE AIR

121
00:08:07,019 --> 00:08:10,523
LIKE YOU
J-J-J-J-UST DON'T CARE!

122
00:08:10,590 --> 00:08:13,326
ALRIGHT, OUR FIRST
CHALLENGER TONIGHT

123
00:08:13,392 --> 00:08:16,195
HAILS FROM
8 CARROT ROAD.

124
00:08:16,262 --> 00:08:18,564
PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER

125
00:08:18,631 --> 00:08:20,399
FOR B- RABBIT.

126
00:08:20,466 --> 00:08:23,903
[ SCATTERED CHEERS
AND APPLAUSE ]

127
00:08:24,604 --> 00:08:26,572
AND FIRST ON THE MIC TONIGHT

128
00:08:26,639 --> 00:08:28,441
IS THE REIGNING CHAMPION,

129
00:08:28,507 --> 00:08:30,309
THE M.C. HUNTER,

130
00:08:30,376 --> 00:08:33,011
ELMER PHUDD WITH A P-H.

131
00:08:33,078 --> 00:08:35,847
I'LL GET YOU, WABBIT!

132
00:08:35,914 --> 00:08:36,849
YO!

133
00:08:36,915 --> 00:08:38,851
I'M TAKING YOU TO SCHOOL.
CALL ME THE PROFESSOR.

134
00:08:38,918 --> 00:08:41,854
YOU'RE SEXUALLY CONFUSED
'CAUSE YOU'RE A CWOSSDWESSA.

135
00:08:41,921 --> 00:08:44,624
YOU WIKE TO KISS MEN,
AND THAT'S WEAL FUNNY.

136
00:08:44,690 --> 00:08:47,093
CALL UP HUGH HEFNER,
YOU'RE A GAY BOY BUNNY.

137
00:08:47,159 --> 00:08:49,962
YOU'RE WOST ON THIS STAGE,
YOU NEED A MAP, JUNKIE.

138
00:08:50,029 --> 00:08:53,665
YOU MADE A WONG WEFT TURN
AT ALBUQUERQUE.

139
00:08:53,733 --> 00:08:54,967
ONE MO'! ONE MO'!

140
00:08:55,034 --> 00:08:57,503
I'M A PIMP 'CAUSE MY HUNTING
APPAREL'S HOT, SON.

141
00:08:57,570 --> 00:09:02,174
I DO A DWIVE BY ON YOUR HOLE
WITH MY DOUBLE BAWWELED
SHOTGUN.

142
00:09:02,241 --> 00:09:03,876
NOW, HOLD ON A SECOND, MAC!

143
00:09:03,943 --> 00:09:07,013
IT'S NOT WABBIT HUNTING
SEASON YET.

144
00:09:07,079 --> 00:09:08,147
SEE?

145
00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:11,550
OK, YOUR TURN, B-RABBIT.

146
00:09:11,617 --> 00:09:13,519
EHH, YO!

147
00:09:13,586 --> 00:09:16,255
UH, YO...

148
00:09:16,322 --> 00:09:18,257
Audience: CHOKE!
CHOKE! CHOKE!

149
00:09:18,324 --> 00:09:20,159
[ NERVOUS LAUGHTER ]

150
00:09:20,226 --> 00:09:23,262
Man: AW, YOU SUCK!

151
00:09:23,329 --> 00:09:24,597
YEAH, YEAH.

152
00:09:24,664 --> 00:09:26,933
I KNOW THAT YOU CALL ME
A WASCALLY WABBIT.

153
00:09:26,999 --> 00:09:30,002
YOU SAY YOUR R'S LIKE W'S,
THAT'S A REALLY BAD HABIT.

154
00:09:30,069 --> 00:09:32,438
IT'S ROOM NOT WOMB,
TREES NOT TWEES.

155
00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:37,076
YOU REPLACE SO MANY R'S
I THOUGHT THAT YOU WAS CHINESE.

156
00:09:37,543 --> 00:09:40,680
YOU'RE SO STUCK ON YOURSELF
I'LL CALL YOU ELMER'S GLUE.

157
00:09:40,746 --> 00:09:44,216
I GOT YOU SOME COFFEE.
ONE LUMP OR TWO?

158
00:09:44,283 --> 00:09:46,819
TWO?

159
00:09:47,987 --> 00:09:51,023
I ONLY DRESS LIKE A GIRL
TO PROVE THAT YOU'RE GAY.

160
00:09:51,090 --> 00:09:53,125
WOULD YOU LIKE A KISS, HANDSOME?

161
00:09:53,192 --> 00:09:54,226
WEALLY?
OKAY.

162
00:09:54,293 --> 00:09:56,495
ELMER PACKS PHUDD,
YOU HEARD WHAT I SAID.

163
00:09:56,562 --> 00:09:58,965
HE'S SO BALD, I'LL PUT
A HARE ON HIS HEAD.

164
00:09:59,031 --> 00:10:02,568
I'LL SIT DOWN ON YOUR HEAD
JUST LIKE I WAS THE THINKER.

165
00:10:02,635 --> 00:10:04,370
HMMM.
[farts]

166
00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:07,173
AIN'T I A STINKER?

167
00:10:07,239 --> 00:10:09,342
HOLY TOLEDO!

168
00:10:09,408 --> 00:10:11,177
B-RABBIT WINS!

169
00:10:11,243 --> 00:10:13,012
B-RABBIT WINS!

170
00:10:13,079 --> 00:10:16,716
[crying]
I'M A DISGRACE.

171
00:10:16,782 --> 00:10:19,752
YO, B-RABBIT,
IT'S ME, DR. DRE.

172
00:10:19,819 --> 00:10:22,188
EHH, WHAT'S UP, DOC?

173
00:10:22,254 --> 00:10:24,190
AIN'T NOTHING
BUT A G THING, BABY.

174
00:10:24,256 --> 00:10:25,725
I'D LIKE TO OFFER YOU
A RECORD DEAL.

175
00:10:25,791 --> 00:10:30,229
YOU GON' GO DOWN IN HISTORY
AS THE FIRST GREY MC.

176
00:10:30,296 --> 00:10:33,499
TH-TH-TH-THAT'S ALL, BITCHES.

177
00:10:33,566 --> 00:10:37,336
♪ CHICKEN CLUCKING ♪

178
00:10:37,403 --> 00:10:42,942
CAPTIONING PROVIDED
BY TURNER STUDIOS