1 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:08,908 ROBOT CHICKEN 23 1987 >> [LAUGHING] 2 00:00:08,975 --> 00:00:12,345 [WHIRRING] [CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY 3 00:00:12,412 --> 00:00:22,389 TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP] >> IT'S ALIVE! 4 00:00:22,455 --> 00:00:43,910 TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP] >> IT'S ALIVE! 5 00:00:43,977 --> 00:00:47,414 >> THIS HERE'S MY TOWN, AND I WON'T LET YOU TAKE IT. 6 00:00:47,480 --> 00:00:59,058 >> YOU JUST TRY AND STOP US. 7 00:00:59,125 --> 00:00:59,993 >> YAY! 8 00:01:00,059 --> 00:01:01,494 >> HURRAY! 9 00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:02,495 >> YAY! 10 00:01:02,562 --> 00:01:03,897 >> ALL IN A DAY'S WORK, KIDS. 11 00:01:03,963 --> 00:01:04,664 OW! 12 00:01:04,730 --> 00:01:05,364 OW! 13 00:01:05,432 --> 00:01:06,366 KIDS, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! 14 00:01:06,433 --> 00:01:07,333 OW! 15 00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:08,301 >> YAY! 16 00:01:08,368 --> 00:01:09,469 >> OW! 17 00:01:09,536 --> 00:01:13,039 AAGH! 18 00:01:13,106 --> 00:01:13,840 >> OW! 19 00:01:13,907 --> 00:01:15,108 PAPER CUT! 20 00:01:15,175 --> 00:01:18,378 >> HOLLYWOOD'S TURNED EVERYTHING FROM OLD TV SHOWS TO VIDEO GAMES 21 00:01:18,445 --> 00:01:20,814 TO THEME PARK RIDES INTO MOVIES. 22 00:01:20,880 --> 00:01:24,617 NOW THEY'RE TACKLING BOARD GAMES GUARANTEEING AUDIENCES WILL BE 23 00:01:24,684 --> 00:01:28,788 UNBORED THIS SUMMER. 24 00:01:28,855 --> 00:01:32,192 [WOLF WHISTLE] >> IN A TOWN TORN APART BY 25 00:01:32,258 --> 00:01:32,892 CRIME... 26 00:01:32,959 --> 00:01:33,726 >> AAGH! 27 00:01:33,793 --> 00:01:35,128 >> THE HEROES BITE BACK! 28 00:01:35,195 --> 00:01:36,529 >> YOU BOYS SURE ARE HUNGRY. 29 00:01:36,596 --> 00:01:37,464 >> HUNGRY... 30 00:01:37,530 --> 00:01:38,865 FOR JUSTICE! 31 00:01:38,932 --> 00:01:43,770 >> AAGH! 32 00:01:43,837 --> 00:01:45,038 >> A HIPPO PLAYING POOL. 33 00:01:45,104 --> 00:01:45,738 HA HA. 34 00:01:45,805 --> 00:01:46,673 I'D LIKE TO SEE THAT. 35 00:01:46,739 --> 00:01:47,507 >> FINE. 36 00:01:47,574 --> 00:01:50,009 I'LL BREAK. 37 00:01:50,076 --> 00:01:54,514 >> IT'S A RACE... 38 00:01:54,581 --> 00:01:55,715 >> AAGH! 39 00:01:55,782 --> 00:01:56,483 >> HELP! 40 00:01:56,549 --> 00:01:57,317 HIPPOS! 41 00:01:57,383 --> 00:01:58,918 >> IT'S A CHASE! 42 00:01:58,985 --> 00:02:02,989 >> AAGH! 43 00:02:03,056 --> 00:02:08,661 >> SO, HURRY UP AND FEED YOUR FACE. 44 00:02:08,728 --> 00:02:13,466 "HUNGRY, HUNGRY HIPPOS!" >> I ALWAYS KNEW THEM HIPPOS WAS 45 00:02:13,533 --> 00:02:14,133 TROUBLE. 46 00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:16,436 [SPITS] [DING] 47 00:02:16,503 --> 00:02:19,706 >> OFFICER JOHN CHUTES WAS BORN TO BE A COP. 48 00:02:19,772 --> 00:02:20,640 >> HYAH! 49 00:02:20,707 --> 00:02:23,142 >> OFFICER MIKEY LADDERS WAS BORN TO BE WILD. 50 00:02:23,209 --> 00:02:24,711 >> YOU WEREN'T JUST ROBBING ONE MAN, YOU KNOW. 51 00:02:24,777 --> 00:02:27,213 YOU GOTTA THINK OF THE SOCIO-ECONOMIC REALITIES 52 00:02:27,280 --> 00:02:28,414 OF THE SITUATION. 53 00:02:28,481 --> 00:02:30,550 OH, I'M SORRY, AM I PUNCHING YOU TOO HARD? 54 00:02:30,617 --> 00:02:33,386 >> BUT THIS SUMMER, OFFICER CHUTES AND OFFICER LADDERS 55 00:02:33,453 --> 00:02:34,754 ARE BORN TO BE... 56 00:02:34,821 --> 00:02:36,155 >> PARTNERS?! 57 00:02:36,222 --> 00:02:37,390 >> OK, WELL... 58 00:02:37,457 --> 00:02:46,933 LET'S JUST DO WHAT WE DO BEST. 59 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,067 >> YEAH! 60 00:02:48,134 --> 00:02:49,836 YOU KIDS NEED TO GIVE ME SOME RESPECT! 61 00:02:49,903 --> 00:02:50,537 OOH! 62 00:02:50,603 --> 00:02:51,704 MY DODGE BALLS! 63 00:02:51,771 --> 00:02:52,739 GRANDMA'S ASHES! 64 00:02:52,805 --> 00:02:56,175 AAGH! 65 00:02:56,242 --> 00:02:58,945 >> BEN STILLER, OWEN WILSON. 66 00:02:59,012 --> 00:02:59,946 >> YEAH, OK, OK. 67 00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:01,014 I'M ENTHUSIASTIC. 68 00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:01,981 THIS IS GOOD. 69 00:03:02,048 --> 00:03:03,249 THIS IS NICE SPAGHETTI. 70 00:03:03,316 --> 00:03:04,517 >> "CHUTES AND LADDERS." 71 00:03:04,584 --> 00:03:10,456 ALSO, CATCH BEN STILLER IN THE FOLLOWING MOVIES THIS SUMMER. 72 00:03:10,523 --> 00:03:13,459 >> ALL WE NEED TO DO IS GET PAST SECURITY, DISABLE THE ALARMS, 73 00:03:13,526 --> 00:03:16,129 BREAK INTO THE VAULT, AND CARRY $400 BILLION IN 74 00:03:16,195 --> 00:03:18,364 UNTRACEABLE BILLS OUT OF THE CASINO. 75 00:03:18,431 --> 00:03:19,332 >> I THINK I GOT A WAY. 76 00:03:19,399 --> 00:03:21,267 [ALARM BLARES] >> WHOO! 77 00:03:21,334 --> 00:03:22,468 >> WHOO! 78 00:03:22,535 --> 00:03:24,337 THAT'S WHAT I CALL A ROYAL FLUSH! 79 00:03:24,404 --> 00:03:26,204 >> JACKPOT, DADDY-O! 80 00:03:26,272 --> 00:03:27,574 HA HA! 81 00:03:27,640 --> 00:03:28,775 >> "SLIP 'N' SLIDE: THE MOVIE." 82 00:03:28,841 --> 00:03:32,812 THIS SUMMER, ACTION IS ALL WET AND PLASTIC AND YOU CAN 83 00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:40,253 SLIDE ON IT. 84 00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:43,456 >> YEE-HAW! 85 00:03:43,523 --> 00:03:46,192 >> AAH! 86 00:03:46,259 --> 00:03:49,629 OH, MASSAGE CHAIR, IF WE LIVED IN CANADA, 87 00:03:49,696 --> 00:03:51,698 I WOULD MAKE YOU MY BRIDE. 88 00:03:51,764 --> 00:03:52,665 >> SKELETOR! 89 00:03:52,732 --> 00:03:53,700 >> OH, NO. 90 00:03:53,766 --> 00:03:57,170 IT'S MO-LARR, ETERNIAN DENTIST. 91 00:03:57,236 --> 00:03:59,973 >> YOU MISSED YOUR 10:15 APPOINTMENT! 92 00:04:00,039 --> 00:04:01,774 >> I'M BUSY, MO-LARR. 93 00:04:01,841 --> 00:04:05,078 >> YOU HAVE AN IMPACTED WISDOM TOOTH, SKELETOR! 94 00:04:05,144 --> 00:04:06,613 IT HAS TO COME OUT! 95 00:04:06,679 --> 00:04:08,481 >> I'M A TALKING SKULL! 96 00:04:08,548 --> 00:04:10,550 WHAT DO I CARE IF-- YOU KNOW WHAT? 97 00:04:10,617 --> 00:04:12,418 THE HELL WITH THIS. 98 00:04:12,485 --> 00:04:17,023 >> THE BOSS MAN SAYS HIS APPOINTMENT IS CANCELLED! 99 00:04:17,089 --> 00:04:18,091 OOF! 100 00:04:18,156 --> 00:04:18,791 OH! 101 00:04:18,858 --> 00:04:19,559 HEY! 102 00:04:19,625 --> 00:04:22,795 >> I'M ALL OUT OF MINT FLAVOR. 103 00:04:22,862 --> 00:04:24,430 >> AAGH! 104 00:04:24,497 --> 00:04:27,433 HOW COME BEAST-MAN GOT THE DENTAL FLOSS AND I GOT THE 105 00:04:27,500 --> 00:04:29,402 [BLEEP] DRILL IN MY EYE?! 106 00:04:29,469 --> 00:04:30,803 >> AAGH! 107 00:04:30,870 --> 00:04:32,005 OOF! 108 00:04:32,071 --> 00:04:34,907 [MUTTERING] AAGH! 109 00:04:34,974 --> 00:04:36,808 >> SUCCESS! 110 00:04:36,876 --> 00:04:38,845 >> OH, YOU SON OF A BITCH! 111 00:04:38,911 --> 00:04:41,347 >> MO-LARR, ETERNIAN DENTIST, COMES WITH EVERYTHING YOU SEE 112 00:04:41,414 --> 00:04:42,015 HERE. 113 00:04:42,081 --> 00:04:44,851 >> [GROANS] >> ♪ M-E-A-T 114 00:04:44,917 --> 00:04:46,686 M-A-C-H-I-N-E MEAT MACHINE 115 00:04:46,753 --> 00:04:48,855 MEAT MACHINE ALL RIGHT, BREAK ♪ 116 00:04:48,921 --> 00:04:50,056 >> HA HA HA HA. 117 00:04:50,123 --> 00:04:51,424 SO, I THREW THE SENATE AT HIM. 118 00:04:51,491 --> 00:04:53,860 >> [LAUGHTER] >> THE WHOLE SENATE. 119 00:04:53,926 --> 00:04:54,560 TRUE STORY. 120 00:04:54,627 --> 00:04:55,495 >> OH, MY GOD. 121 00:04:55,561 --> 00:04:56,963 THAT IS SO FUNNY. 122 00:04:57,030 --> 00:04:58,931 >> YOU MADE IT COME OUT OF MY NOSE. 123 00:04:58,998 --> 00:04:59,799 >> HA HA HA. 124 00:04:59,866 --> 00:05:02,835 [TELEPHONE RINGS] GO FOR PAPA PALPATINE. 125 00:05:02,902 --> 00:05:04,537 >> YOU HAVE A COLLECT CALL FROM... 126 00:05:04,604 --> 00:05:07,507 >> [MECHANICAL BREATHING] DARTH VADER. 127 00:05:07,573 --> 00:05:08,241 >> UGH. 128 00:05:08,307 --> 00:05:09,275 I GOTTA TAKE THIS. 129 00:05:09,342 --> 00:05:09,976 HOLD ON. 130 00:05:10,043 --> 00:05:12,945 VADER, HOW'S MY FAVORITE SITH? 131 00:05:13,012 --> 00:05:14,847 WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA! 132 00:05:14,914 --> 00:05:15,982 JUST SLOW DOWN. 133 00:05:16,049 --> 00:05:17,383 HUH? 134 00:05:17,450 --> 00:05:20,119 WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY BLEW UP THE DEATH STAR?! 135 00:05:20,186 --> 00:05:21,621 [BLEEP]! 136 00:05:21,688 --> 00:05:23,589 OH, [BLEEP] [BLEEP]! 137 00:05:23,656 --> 00:05:26,025 [BLEEP]! 138 00:05:26,092 --> 00:05:28,461 WHO'S THEY?! 139 00:05:28,528 --> 00:05:31,164 WHAT THE HELL IS AN ALUMINUM FALCON? 140 00:05:31,230 --> 00:05:32,632 OK, OK. 141 00:05:32,699 --> 00:05:34,300 SO, WHO'S LEFT? 142 00:05:34,367 --> 00:05:36,034 ARE YOU [BLEEP] ME?! 143 00:05:36,102 --> 00:05:37,704 WELL, WHERE ARE YOU?! 144 00:05:37,770 --> 00:05:38,838 WAIT A SEC. 145 00:05:38,905 --> 00:05:40,306 YOU'VE BEEN FLYING AROUND FOR TWO WEEKS TRYING TO GET A 146 00:05:40,373 --> 00:05:41,407 SIGNAL? 147 00:05:41,474 --> 00:05:42,675 OH, YOU MUST SMELL LIKE... 148 00:05:42,742 --> 00:05:47,380 FEET WRAPPED IN LEATHERY, BURNT BACON. 149 00:05:47,447 --> 00:05:48,681 OH, OH, OH, I'M SORRY. 150 00:05:48,748 --> 00:05:51,417 I THOUGHT MY DARK LORD OF THE SITH COULD PROTECT A SMALL 151 00:05:51,484 --> 00:05:54,087 THERMAL EXHAUST PORT THAT'S ONLY TWO METERS WIDE. 152 00:05:54,153 --> 00:05:56,355 THAT THING WASN'T EVEN FULLY PAID OFF YET! 153 00:05:56,422 --> 00:05:58,391 DO YOU HAVE--DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT THIS IS GONNA DO TO MY 154 00:05:58,457 --> 00:05:59,258 CREDIT? 155 00:05:59,325 --> 00:06:00,760 [TELEPHONE BEEPS] OH, HANG ON. 156 00:06:00,827 --> 00:06:01,928 I GOT ANOTHER CALL. 157 00:06:01,994 --> 00:06:02,595 WHAT?! 158 00:06:02,662 --> 00:06:04,330 I'M VERY BUSY RIGHT NOW! 159 00:06:04,397 --> 00:06:05,465 OH. 160 00:06:05,531 --> 00:06:06,399 OH, WELL. 161 00:06:06,466 --> 00:06:07,767 WELL, WHERE ARE THEY GOING? 162 00:06:07,834 --> 00:06:08,601 OH. 163 00:06:08,668 --> 00:06:09,302 ALL RIGHT. 164 00:06:09,368 --> 00:06:10,136 UM... 165 00:06:10,203 --> 00:06:12,338 JUST GET ME A TURKEY CLUB. 166 00:06:12,405 --> 00:06:14,340 UH, COLE SLAW, I GUESS. 167 00:06:14,407 --> 00:06:15,775 I'M NOT EVEN GONNA EAT IT. 168 00:06:15,842 --> 00:06:18,678 WHAT--WHAT--WHAT ARE YOU GETTING? 169 00:06:18,745 --> 00:06:21,013 NO, SEE, I ALWAYS ORDER THE WRONG THING. 170 00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:21,914 NO, NO, NO. 171 00:06:21,981 --> 00:06:23,282 I'LL JUST STICK WITH THAT. 172 00:06:23,349 --> 00:06:24,016 OK, BYE. 173 00:06:24,082 --> 00:06:25,084 WAIT, WHAT? 174 00:06:25,151 --> 00:06:26,686 OH, CHERRY COKE. 175 00:06:26,753 --> 00:06:27,754 THANKS. 176 00:06:27,820 --> 00:06:28,688 SORRY ABOUT THAT. 177 00:06:28,755 --> 00:06:31,324 [SIGHS] WHAT? 178 00:06:31,390 --> 00:06:33,058 OH, OH, JUST REBUILD IT? 179 00:06:33,126 --> 00:06:34,827 OH, THAT--REAL, REAL [BLEEP] ORIGINAL! 180 00:06:34,894 --> 00:06:36,529 AND WHO'S GOING TO GIVE ME A LOAN, JACK-HOLE? 181 00:06:36,596 --> 00:06:37,396 YOU?! 182 00:06:37,463 --> 00:06:39,699 YOU GOT AN ATM ON THAT TORSO LITE-BRITE? 183 00:06:39,766 --> 00:06:43,034 NOW, GET YOUR 7'2" ASTHMATIC ASS BACK HERE OR I'M GONNA TELL 184 00:06:43,102 --> 00:06:46,239 EVERYONE WHAT A WHINEY BITCH YOU WERE ABOUT PATOMOMMI OR PANDA 185 00:06:46,305 --> 00:06:49,207 BEAR OR WHATEVER THE HELL HER NAME IS! 186 00:06:49,275 --> 00:06:49,876 OH, JEEZ! 187 00:06:49,942 --> 00:06:50,576 HE'S CRYING. 188 00:06:50,643 --> 00:06:51,944 HA HA HA. 189 00:06:52,011 --> 00:06:53,513 HEY, HEY, HEY. 190 00:06:53,579 --> 00:06:54,480 HEY, COME ON. 191 00:06:54,547 --> 00:06:55,148 COME ON. 192 00:06:55,214 --> 00:06:55,948 DON'T DO THAT. 193 00:06:56,015 --> 00:06:57,183 JUST, JUST... 194 00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:59,619 LOOK, YOU KNOW, I'M JUST DEALING WITH A LOT OF CRAP RIGHT NOW. 195 00:06:59,685 --> 00:07:02,455 DEATH STAR BLOWN UP BY A BUNCH OF [BLEEP] TEENAGERS, 196 00:07:02,522 --> 00:07:03,723 YOU KNOW... 197 00:07:03,790 --> 00:07:06,893 I DIDN'T MEAN TO SNAP. 198 00:07:06,959 --> 00:07:08,094 OH--OK--OK. 199 00:07:08,161 --> 00:07:09,662 JUST GET BACK HERE. 200 00:07:09,729 --> 00:07:10,396 OK. 201 00:07:10,463 --> 00:07:11,430 OK, BYE. 202 00:07:11,497 --> 00:07:12,331 I--YEAH. 203 00:07:12,398 --> 00:07:15,802 I-- I LOVE YOU, TOO. 204 00:07:15,868 --> 00:07:18,905 >> AND THEN THIS SAP WILL BE MADE INTO YUMMY MAPLE SYRUP. 205 00:07:18,971 --> 00:07:20,807 NOW, WHAT IS WRONG HERE? 206 00:07:20,873 --> 00:07:21,707 >> OH, YEAH! 207 00:07:21,774 --> 00:07:22,642 ALMOST THERE. 208 00:07:22,707 --> 00:07:24,343 ALMOST THERE. 209 00:07:24,410 --> 00:07:26,145 >> THIS IN THE NAME OF SCIENCE, BOY. 210 00:07:26,212 --> 00:07:29,282 WE GONNA CONDUCT AN EXPERIMENT UP INSIDE URANUS. 211 00:07:29,348 --> 00:07:32,118 NOW, SQUEAL LIKE A PIG! 212 00:07:32,185 --> 00:07:34,720 >> FIGHT! 213 00:07:34,787 --> 00:07:38,157 FINISH HIM. 214 00:07:38,224 --> 00:07:39,592 >> PRESSURE'S DOWN TO 60. 215 00:07:39,659 --> 00:07:40,293 >> DAMN IT! 216 00:07:40,359 --> 00:07:41,460 HE'S LOSING TOO MUCH BLOOD. 217 00:07:41,527 --> 00:07:43,362 DON'T YOU DIE ON ME, YOU HEAR? 218 00:07:43,429 --> 00:07:53,406 NURSE, GET ME MORE O-NEG, STAT! 219 00:07:53,472 --> 00:08:10,389 NURSE, GET ME MORE O-NEG, STAT! 220 00:08:10,456 --> 00:08:11,357 >> FEELING BETTER? 221 00:08:11,424 --> 00:08:12,725 >> I FEEL GREAT. 222 00:08:12,792 --> 00:08:16,495 >> FINISH HIM! 223 00:08:16,562 --> 00:08:18,998 >> GOOD NIGHT, LOVE BUG! 224 00:08:19,065 --> 00:08:21,033 YOU KNOW, YOU GOTTA WATCH THAT FLIRTING. 225 00:08:21,100 --> 00:08:23,803 I'LL GET YOU INTO TROUBLE! 226 00:08:23,870 --> 00:08:24,570 TROUBLE. 227 00:08:24,637 --> 00:08:37,582 WHOA! 228 00:08:37,650 --> 00:08:40,852 >> SHH! 229 00:08:40,919 --> 00:08:47,059 [HORN HONKING] >> WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN 230 00:08:47,126 --> 00:08:48,861 SLEEPING ON? 231 00:08:48,928 --> 00:08:52,298 >> PAN-GLOBAL OIL KEEPS DUMPING SLUDGE INTO THE ATLANTIC OCEAN. 232 00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:54,834 >> THAT BURNS MY ASS! 233 00:08:54,901 --> 00:08:55,801 >> FORGET IT, TED. 234 00:08:55,868 --> 00:08:57,169 THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO. 235 00:08:57,236 --> 00:09:04,777 >> MAYBE I CAN'T, BUT CAPTAIN PLANET CAN! 236 00:09:04,844 --> 00:09:12,919 CAPTAIN PLANET! 237 00:09:12,985 --> 00:09:14,754 CAPTAIN PLANET! 238 00:09:14,820 --> 00:09:15,922 >> OH! 239 00:09:15,988 --> 00:09:23,996 >> CAPTAIN PLANET! 240 00:09:24,063 --> 00:09:25,131 CAPTAIN PLANET! 241 00:09:25,197 --> 00:09:26,766 >> WHERE ARE WE GONNA DUMP OUR SLUDGE NEXT? 242 00:09:26,832 --> 00:09:28,734 >> WELL, THE GRAND CANYON COULD HOLD A LOT OF SLUDGE. 243 00:09:28,801 --> 00:09:29,835 >> OH, IT SURE COULD. 244 00:09:29,902 --> 00:09:31,203 >> YEAH, LET'S SLUDGE THE HELL OUT OF THE GRAND CANYON. 245 00:09:31,270 --> 00:09:32,004 >> YEAH! 246 00:09:32,071 --> 00:09:33,472 IS THAT TED TURNER? 247 00:09:33,539 --> 00:09:34,307 >> I THINK IT IS. 248 00:09:34,373 --> 00:09:35,241 WHAT THE HELL'S HE DOING? 249 00:09:35,308 --> 00:09:35,942 >> I DON'T KNOW. 250 00:09:36,008 --> 00:09:36,709 HE'S ON ONE OF THOSE ZIP-LINES. 251 00:09:36,776 --> 00:09:37,543 >> OH, YEAH. 252 00:09:37,610 --> 00:09:38,778 IS THAT WHAT THEY'RE CALLED, ZIP-LINES? 253 00:09:38,844 --> 00:09:39,612 >> YEAH, ZIP-LINES. 254 00:09:39,679 --> 00:09:40,780 >> WELL, I ALWAYS THOUGHT IT WAS--OOH! 255 00:09:40,846 --> 00:09:42,415 >> CAPTAIN PLANET! 256 00:09:42,481 --> 00:09:44,116 >> YOU GOT GLASS IN MY EYE! 257 00:09:44,183 --> 00:09:46,352 >> AND MY FOOT IN YOUR BALLS! 258 00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:49,221 CAPTAIN PLANET! 259 00:09:49,288 --> 00:09:50,690 >> WHAT DO YOU WANT, MR. TURNER?! 260 00:09:50,756 --> 00:09:53,759 >> JUST SIGN THIS PLEDGE NOT TO DUMP ANY MORE SLUDGE AND I'LL 261 00:09:53,826 --> 00:09:54,760 LET YOU GO! 262 00:09:54,827 --> 00:09:56,362 >> OK, OK! 263 00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:58,431 >> THIS APPEARS TO BE IN ORDER. 264 00:09:58,497 --> 00:10:00,166 CAPTAIN PLANET! 265 00:10:00,232 --> 00:10:06,405 >> [SCREAMING] >> PROTECT THE ENVIRONMENT 266 00:10:06,472 --> 00:10:08,708 OR I'LL [BLEEP] KILL YOU! 267 00:10:08,774 --> 00:10:11,744 CAPTAIN PLANET! 268 00:10:11,811 --> 00:10:12,745 >> YOU HEARD IT HERE, FOLKS. 269 00:10:12,812 --> 00:10:15,481 THE BIGGEST CATCH-PHRASE THE NEW MILLENNIUM WILL 270 00:10:15,548 --> 00:10:18,050 BE "CAPTAIN PLANET!" MY FRIENDS SAY IT ALL THE TIME. 271 00:10:18,117 --> 00:10:19,652 AND THEN WE KICK EACH OTHER IN THE NUTS. 272 00:10:19,719 --> 00:10:20,953 OH, THAT'S AWESOME! 273 00:10:21,020 --> 00:10:23,289 >> AS THE OPENING CREDIT SEQUENCE BASICALLY TELLS YOU, 274 00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:26,258 YOU ARE THE CHICKEN FORCED TO WATCH THIS [BLEEP]. 275 00:10:26,325 --> 00:10:27,526 >> AM I GETTING PAID FOR THIS? 276 00:10:27,593 --> 00:10:30,129 >> IF I HAD A TOY OF MYSELF, I'D HAVE TO MAKE OUT WITH IT. 277 00:10:30,196 --> 00:10:30,796 >> YEAH, OOH! 278 00:10:30,863 --> 00:10:31,497 TWINKIE THE KID. 279 00:10:31,564 --> 00:10:32,732 THAT'S TOPICAL. 280 00:10:32,798 --> 00:10:33,532 >> MMM! 281 00:10:33,599 --> 00:10:34,300 MMM! 282 00:10:34,367 --> 00:10:35,901 >> HEY, HERE'S ANOTHER GREAT THING. 283 00:10:35,968 --> 00:10:38,104 WE'RE GONNA DO MOVIE PARODIES. 284 00:10:38,170 --> 00:10:41,407 >> DOES THE WORLD NEED ANOTHER OWEN WILSON, BEN STILLER MOVIE? 285 00:10:41,474 --> 00:10:43,743 THE ANSWER IS AN EMPHATIC YES. 286 00:10:43,809 --> 00:10:44,744 >> "CHUTES AND LADDERS." 287 00:10:44,810 --> 00:10:45,678 WHAT, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! 288 00:10:45,745 --> 00:10:46,512 A TRAVESTY! 289 00:10:46,579 --> 00:10:48,014 THIS IS COMEDY TO THESE PEOPLE. 290 00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:51,117 >> YES, YES, YES, AND MORE YES. 291 00:10:51,183 --> 00:10:52,351 >> MMM! 292 00:10:52,418 --> 00:10:53,919 >> IT USED TO BE THAT WHEN YOUR CAREER WAS ON THE DOWN SLOPE, 293 00:10:53,986 --> 00:10:55,221 YOU'D JUST GO TO INFOMERCIALS. 294 00:10:55,287 --> 00:10:57,023 NOW, YOU GO TO "ROBOT CHICKEN." 295 00:10:57,089 --> 00:10:57,757 >> MMM! 296 00:10:57,823 --> 00:10:58,824 MMM! 297 00:10:58,891 --> 00:11:00,593 >> THE BEST "ROBOT CHICKEN" EVER--COULDN'T BE A MORE 298 00:11:00,659 --> 00:11:01,961 OPPOSITE STATEMENT. 299 00:11:02,028 --> 00:11:03,496 THAT SHOW STINKS. 300 00:11:03,562 --> 00:11:05,297 >> IT'S NOT GAY, IT'S MASTURBATION. 301 00:11:05,364 --> 00:11:07,733 >> PEOPLE WATCH THIS ON TELEVISION! 302 00:11:07,800 --> 00:11:09,402 THEY CHOSE THIS! 303 00:11:09,468 --> 00:11:12,671 >> [CLUCKING] [CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY 304 00:11:12,738 --> 00:11:15,441 TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP] [CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL 305 00:11:15,508 --> 00:11:23,749 CAPTIONING INSTITUTE --www.ncicap.org--] 306 00:11:23,816 --> 00:11:29,655 >> BOCK. 307 00:11:29,722 --> 00:11:31,724 >> STOOPID MONKEY.