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Robot Chicken 25
Federated Resources

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[DRILL]
>> IT'S ALIVE!

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[DRILL]
>> IT'S ALIVE!

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[CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP]

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>> THIS IS HOW I DANCE WHEN
I'M NOT WEARING UNDERPANTS.

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NOTHING I LIKE MORE THAN TO
DANCE, AND I'M NOT GONNA WEAR NO

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PANTS.

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YOU CAN'T MAKE ME--
>> J.K. ROWLING.

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>> COR BLIMEY, ARE YOU AN ANGEL?

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>> I AM FROM THE FUTURE.

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IN 15 YEARS' TIME, YOU WILL BE A
BEST-SELLING CHILDREN'S BOOK

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AUTHOR WHOSE NET WORTH IS MORE
THAN ONE BILLION AMERICAN

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DOLLARS.

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>> I HAD AN IDEA ABOUT A BOY
WIZARD.

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>> NO.

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YOUR BOOKS WILL BE ABOUT A
MAGICAL RACCOON.

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HE HAS AN AFRO.

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HIS NAME IS SQUIGGLES AND HE
SHOOTS PIXIE DUST OUT OF HIS

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BUNGHOLE.

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>> THANK YOU.

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I'LL START RIGHT AWAY.

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>> HEH HEH.

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>> OK, LITTLE GIRL, PICK ANY PET
YOU'D LIKE.

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>> THANKS.

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WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE,
MR. KITTY CAT?

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>> A SPACE TIME VORTEX OPENED UP
ON MY HOME PLANET THUNDERA, AND

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I SUDDENLY FOUND MYSELF ON EARTH
WHERE CATS APPARENTLY DON'T

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SHARE THE SAME RIGHTS AS HUMANS.

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>> YOU'RE SO CUTE.

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I CHOOSE YOU.

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I CAN'T WAIT FOR SHOW AND TELL.

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>> HA HA HA!

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♪ VICKY HAS COOTIES
VICKY HAS COOTIES ♪

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>> HEE HEE HEE!

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STOP IT, BILLY.

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>> VICKY DOES NOT HAVE COOTIES.

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ANYONE ELSE?

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HUH? ANYONE ELSE?

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COME ON, I GOT 9 LIVES AND A
WHOLE CAN OF WHOOPASS.

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>> BAD!

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BAD MR. KITTY CAT!

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>> FINE, FINE.

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I OVERREACTED.

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SORRY, EVERYBODY.

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SORRY, THAT ONE'S ON ME.

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PLEASE STOP THAT.

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>> THIS IS MY NEW PET.

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HIS NAME IS MR. KITTY CAT, AND I
GOT HIM AT THE POUND.

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>> ACTUALLY, MY NAME IS LION-O,
LEADER OF THE THUNDERCATS.

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I'M THE CHOSEN ONE.

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>> LAME.

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>> ARRRRGGHHH!

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AW, COME ON, VICKY.

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AREN'T WE STILL FRIENDS?

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HUH?

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B.F.F.

57
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>> NO.

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>> AW! OH!

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VICKY!

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>> GO TO HELL!

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>> DON'T WORRY, LION-O.

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WE'LL FIND YOU A HOME.

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>> MISS PRISSY PANTS, STOP
FUSSING WITH YOUR BOW.

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>> THIS BOW SUCKS.

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AND MY NAME IS LION-O, LEADER OF
THE THUNDERCATS, SWORN TO--

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>> SEE?

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GROUCHY KITTIES DON'T GET ANY
TUNA.

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>> I BETTER GET SOME FRICKIN'
TUNA.

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>> YES?

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>> BECAUSE YOUR WIFE WAS A
BITCH?

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>> BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH.

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YES.

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>> THERE YOU GO.

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ONE SHAVED HEAD.

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>> GREAT.

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LET'S MAKE THE CARPET MATCH THE
DRAPES.

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>> MARGARET. SARAH.

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>> A PONY! A PONY!

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>> YAY! A PONY!

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>> ONLY ONE OF YOU GETS THE
PONY.

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THE OTHER ONE GETS A WHIPPING.

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>> NOW LET'S SEE THOSE REPORT
CARDS.

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>> THE BRITISH ARE COMING!

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THE BRITISH ARE COMING!

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HEY, A SHORTCUT.

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UHH!

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AHH!

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>> HERE, CLIFFORD!

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HERE, BOY!

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AAH!

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NO, CLIFFORD, NO!

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BAD DOG, CLIFFORD!

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BAD DOG!

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[SOBBING]
OH, CLIFFORD.

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>> UM, YOU KNOW I'VE NEVER DONE
A NEUTERING BEFORE?

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>> JUST DO YOUR BEST.

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>> NOW LIVE FROM THE SHADY ACRES
NURSING HOME, THE LEGENDARY EVEL

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KNIEVEL'S GREATEST STUNT EVER
ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW.

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[DRUMROLL]
>> UHH!

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[DRUMROLL]
>> UHH!

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[THUNDER]
>> IT'S MOSES.

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HE'S BACK.

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00:04:16,623 --> 00:04:19,892
>> GOD HAS BLESSED ME WITH 10
IRREFUTABLE COMMANDMENTS FOR

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LIVING.

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00:04:21,194 --> 00:04:22,829
>> IS THERE ANYTHING ON THERE
ABOUT NOT PUSHING YOUR RELIGION

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ON OTHER PEOPLE?

107
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>> NO.

108
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>> DIDN'T THINK SO.

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>> NUMBER ONE.

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HE WHO SMELT IT DEALT IT.

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[LAUGHTER]
WHAT'S SO FUNNY?

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STOP IT.

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STOP LAUGHING.

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>> HA HA HA!

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>> ♪ BORK, BORK, BORK, BORK ♪
HEY, BJORK, BJORK.

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♪ BJORK, BJORK, BJORK
BJORK, BJORK, BJORK, BJORK ♪

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HEY, MORK.

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NANOO.

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♪ BORK, BORK, BORK ♪
HEY, DORK.

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HA HA!

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DORK. DORK.

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NEW YORK. NEW YORK.

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♪ YORK, YORK ♪
[GASP]

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QUARK!

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OH, QUARK!

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QUARK! QUARK!

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TOUR?

128
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♪ TOUR, TOUR, TOUR, TOUR ♪
ZORK. ZORK.

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ZORK, ZORK.

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♪ ZORK, ZORK, ZORK ♪
HEY, PORK.

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♪ PORK, PORK, PORK, PORK, PORK ♪
A FORK?

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WHERE THE FORK?

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NEED A FORK, FORK.

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FORK, FORK.

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HEY, THERE IS SPORK.

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SPORK, SPORK.

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♪ SPORK, SPORK, SPORK, SPORK ♪
THERE THE ORC!

138
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ORC!

139
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BORK! BORK!

140
00:05:23,723 --> 00:05:24,957
>> OH, WHAT KEPT YOU, HONEY?

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DINNER'S WAITING.

142
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>> GET THE HELL OFF MY BACK,
WOMAN!

143
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CAN I GET A MOMENT OF [BEEP]
PEACE?

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AHH!

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[GLASS BREAKS]
>> OH, YEAH.

146
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NOW JUST LIKE THAT.

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NOW SPANK ME AND CALL ME DADDY.

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00:05:35,935 --> 00:05:37,737
>> UN DUSSELDORFER MEIN KAMPF!

149
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>> SIEG HEIL!

150
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>> [SPEAKING BROKEN GERMAN]
[WATER SPLASHING]

151
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[FARTING]
>> OH! AHH!

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>> BAH!

153
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>> ACHTUNG!

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ACHTUNG!

155
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HELLO?

156
00:05:58,558 --> 00:05:59,892
>> HEH HEH HEH.

157
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DOUCHE.

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>> I, UH--I WALKED INTO A DOOR.

159
00:06:05,998 --> 00:06:09,736
>> WELL, THEN, CAN I INTEREST
YOU IN OUR LINE OF NERF DOORS?

160
00:06:09,802 --> 00:06:10,636
>> WHAT ABOUT STAIRS?

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SHE'S GONNA NEED SOME NERF
STAIRS, TOO.

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[ALARM BEEPING]
>> [YAWN]

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GOOD MORNING.

164
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WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO TODAY,
COREY FELDMAN?

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>> SAME THING WE DO EVERY DAY,
COREY HAIM.

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WE SAVE THE WORLD.

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♪ DA DA NAH NAH NAH
DA DA DA DA... ♪

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>> [IMITATING GUITAR]
>> LET'S GO START THE DAY.

169
00:06:41,701 --> 00:06:42,935
>> YEAH!

170
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[CRICKET CHIRPING]
>> THIS JUST IN.

171
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PRESIDENT BUSH'S DAUGHTERS ARE
MISSING IN ACTION AFTER THE

172
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HELICOPTER CARRYING THEM TO A
U.S.O. TOUR EVENT CRASHED IN

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THE BRAZILIAN RAIN FOREST.

174
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THE MILITARY RELEASED THE
FOLLOWING VIDEOTAPE JUST PRIOR

175
00:06:55,982 --> 00:06:56,682
TO THE CRASH.

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00:06:56,749 --> 00:06:57,717
>> WHOO-HOO!

177
00:06:57,784 --> 00:07:00,353
IT IS A PARTY!

178
00:07:00,419 --> 00:07:01,821
AAH-OOH!

179
00:07:01,888 --> 00:07:03,556
>> MY DAD'S THE PRESIDENT.

180
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>> MISS BUSH, PLEASE!

181
00:07:04,423 --> 00:07:05,525
I CAN'T--NOT YET!

182
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OH, LOOK OUT!

183
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>> TWO PRESIDENTIAL DAUGHTERS.

184
00:07:10,096 --> 00:07:11,297
THAT'S ONE FOR EACH OF US.

185
00:07:11,364 --> 00:07:21,641
>> FELD-DOG, LET'S ROLL.

186
00:07:21,707 --> 00:07:23,176
COORDINATES ARE LOCKED IN.

187
00:07:23,242 --> 00:07:24,877
>> LET'S PUNCH IT.

188
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WHOO!

189
00:07:25,845 --> 00:07:26,746
YEAH!

190
00:07:26,813 --> 00:07:28,748
>> LET'S GO, GO, GO, GO!

191
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OH, THIS IS TIGHT!

192
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THIS IS TIGHT!

193
00:07:31,551 --> 00:07:33,719
AND THAT'S WHAT WOULD IT BE LIKE
IF WE HAD THE COREY VAN AND THE

194
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COREY JET.

195
00:07:37,557 --> 00:07:38,257
LISTEN TO ME.

196
00:07:38,324 --> 00:07:39,959
WE SHOULD HAVE COREY ROCKET
PACKS.

197
00:07:40,026 --> 00:07:41,561
>> HEY, COREY, I GOT AN IDEA FOR
YOU.

198
00:07:41,627 --> 00:07:48,501
HOW ABOUT A NICE, TALL GLASS OF
SHUT THE [BEEP] UP?

199
00:07:48,568 --> 00:07:49,569
HEY, BARKEEP.

200
00:07:49,635 --> 00:07:50,903
NICE FROSTY COLA RIGHT HERE.

201
00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:52,171
>> TWO STRAWS, PLEASE.

202
00:07:52,238 --> 00:07:54,907
>> WE DON'T SERVE YOUR KIND
HERE.

203
00:07:54,974 --> 00:07:55,842
>> OUR KIND?

204
00:07:55,908 --> 00:07:57,476
YOU MEAN AMERICANS?

205
00:07:57,543 --> 00:08:00,847
>> NO, I MEAN ANYONE WHO'S EVER
BEEN ON THE COVER OF A TEEN

206
00:08:00,913 --> 00:08:08,054
MAGAZINE LIKE "BUFF," "TIGER
BEAT," "TEEN BEAT," "COSMO

207
00:08:08,120 --> 00:08:11,057
GIRL," "J-14"...

208
00:08:11,123 --> 00:08:11,991
>> HA HA.

209
00:08:12,058 --> 00:08:14,393
BOY, DID YOU GUYS PICK THE WRONG
TWO COREYS.

210
00:08:14,460 --> 00:08:15,494
HEY, HEY, HEY, GUYS.

211
00:08:15,561 --> 00:08:16,696
LISTEN.

212
00:08:16,762 --> 00:08:18,798
WE DON'T WANT ANY TROUBLE, AND I
DON'T THINK YOU DO, EITHER,

213
00:08:18,865 --> 00:08:20,032
SO...

214
00:08:20,099 --> 00:08:22,668
>> TO THE CONTRARY, TROUBLE IS
WHAT YOU NOW HAVE BECAUSE WE ARE

215
00:08:22,735 --> 00:08:24,070
GIVING IT TO YOU.

216
00:08:24,136 --> 00:08:26,138
>> "ORIENTATION OF SEXUAL"...

217
00:08:26,205 --> 00:08:27,306
>> WAIT!

218
00:08:27,373 --> 00:08:28,407
WAIT.

219
00:08:28,474 --> 00:08:29,308
HEH HEH HEH.

220
00:08:29,375 --> 00:08:35,313
JUST WAIT.

221
00:08:35,381 --> 00:08:37,283
NOW WE'RE GONNA TEAR IT UP.

222
00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:44,957
>> YEAH, LOST BOYS STYLE.

223
00:08:45,024 --> 00:08:46,292
>> AAH!

224
00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:47,927
MY EAR!

225
00:08:47,994 --> 00:08:50,897
>> HEY! THAT WAS--OW!

226
00:08:50,963 --> 00:08:52,832
HEY, DON'T--OW!

227
00:08:52,899 --> 00:09:03,876
>> AAH!

228
00:09:03,943 --> 00:09:04,877
>> WOW.

229
00:09:04,944 --> 00:09:08,047
THANKS FOR HELPING US, DOUCHE--
UH, SCREECH.

230
00:09:08,114 --> 00:09:11,250
>> THE LOCATION OF THE BUSH
DAUGHTERS IS HERE, AND NOW I

231
00:09:11,317 --> 00:09:13,853
MUST RETURN TO MY MUAY THAI
KICKBOX TRAINING.

232
00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:15,021
>> WHY WOULD YOU HELP US?

233
00:09:15,087 --> 00:09:18,324
>> BECAUSE I, TOO, AM A FORMER
TEEN IDOL.

234
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:19,425
>> UH, NO.

235
00:09:19,492 --> 00:09:21,494
ACTUALLY, YOU WERE MORE LIKE A
SECOND THIRD BANANA ON A

236
00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:25,464
B-RATED KIDS' SHOW, BUT HEY,
WHATEVER YOU SAY.

237
00:09:25,531 --> 00:09:27,133
>> WHAT THE HELL IS THIS PLACE?

238
00:09:27,199 --> 00:09:28,200
IS THIS THE PLACE?

239
00:09:28,267 --> 00:09:29,402
COULD THIS BE THE PLACE?

240
00:09:29,468 --> 00:09:31,404
I'M GOING IN EITHER WAY, SO...

241
00:09:31,470 --> 00:09:39,812
>> LOVE SHACK, BABY!

242
00:09:39,879 --> 00:09:41,180
>> YO!

243
00:09:41,247 --> 00:09:42,581
PRESIDENTIAL BABES.

244
00:09:42,648 --> 00:09:43,582
>> WE'RE HERE TO RESCUE YOU.

245
00:09:43,649 --> 00:09:44,750
>> RESCUE US?

246
00:09:44,817 --> 00:09:46,385
YOU CAN GO STRAIGHT TO HELL!

247
00:09:46,452 --> 00:09:48,554
>> YEAH, WE'RE FINALLY FREE!

248
00:09:48,621 --> 00:09:50,056
FREE TO PARTY!

249
00:09:50,122 --> 00:09:54,327
>> WHOO!

250
00:09:54,393 --> 00:09:56,095
>> WE'RE NEVER GOING HOME.

251
00:09:56,162 --> 00:09:57,596
WHOO-HOO!

252
00:09:57,663 --> 00:09:59,999
>> LOOK, FELD-DOG, IF WE CAN'T
BRING THEM HOME, WE CAN'T BE

253
00:10:00,066 --> 00:10:01,200
HEROES.

254
00:10:01,267 --> 00:10:04,236
>> WELL, HAIM, LOOKS LIKE WE'VE
GOT TO RELY ON OUR ONE TRUE

255
00:10:04,303 --> 00:10:05,404
SKILL.

256
00:10:05,471 --> 00:10:06,772
>> WAIT, YOU'RE NOT TALKING
ABOUT THE THING WE DO WITH OUR

257
00:10:06,839 --> 00:10:07,540
TAINTS, RIGHT?

258
00:10:07,606 --> 00:10:08,374
ARE YOU?

259
00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:11,344
>> NO, COREY--ACTING.

260
00:10:11,410 --> 00:10:13,612
>> EVEN THOUGH COREY HAIM AND
COREY FELDMAN COULDN'T BE HERE

261
00:10:13,679 --> 00:10:16,382
TODAY, I WANT TO THANK THEM FOR
BRINGING MY PRECIOUS DAUGHTERS

262
00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:18,818
HOME.

263
00:10:18,884 --> 00:10:22,355
I HEREBY DECLARE THAT ANYONE WHO
HATES THE COREYS ALSO HATES

264
00:10:22,421 --> 00:10:23,089
AMERICA.

265
00:10:23,155 --> 00:10:24,156
>> HEY, FELD-DOG, FELD-DOG.

266
00:10:24,223 --> 00:10:26,325
WHAT HAPPENS IF THEY FIND THE
REAL BUSH TWINS, MAN?

267
00:10:26,392 --> 00:10:28,361
>> FAT CHANCE.

268
00:10:28,427 --> 00:10:29,795
>> DAD? OW!

269
00:10:29,862 --> 00:10:32,865
>> DAMN YOU TO HELL, COREY HAIM
AND COREY FELDMAN.

270
00:10:32,932 --> 00:10:34,700
>> MY DAD'S THE PRESIDENT.

271
00:10:34,767 --> 00:10:39,672
I'M GONNA GET YOU BURIED IN OIL
AND THEN I'M GONNA HAVE MY DADDY

272
00:10:39,739 --> 00:10:41,073
INVADE YOU!

273
00:10:41,140 --> 00:10:42,575
>> MY DAD WILL GET YOU HURT.

274
00:10:42,641 --> 00:10:44,610
YEAH, HOW'D YOU LIKE TO HAVE
YOUR ASS KICKED BY

275
00:10:44,677 --> 00:10:47,013
HALLI-B-BURTON OR HALLIBLURTON?

276
00:10:47,079 --> 00:10:48,214
>> HA HA HA!

277
00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:51,484
THINK, JENNA, WE'RE LIKE OLD
APPLES TIED UP TO A SACK OF

278
00:10:51,550 --> 00:10:52,485
[BEEP].

279
00:10:52,551 --> 00:10:53,486
>> IT'S DARK.

280
00:10:53,552 --> 00:10:55,221
>> ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

281
00:10:55,287 --> 00:10:58,057
I GOT TO GO TO THE BATHROOM.

282
00:10:58,124 --> 00:10:59,592
>> EAT MY AIR!

283
00:10:59,658 --> 00:11:00,826
HA HA HA!

284
00:11:00,893 --> 00:11:07,233
>> LOOK AT ME GO!

285
00:11:07,299 --> 00:11:09,268
[CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP]

286
00:11:09,335 --> 00:11:11,270
[CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL
CAPTIONING INSTITUTE

287
00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:12,338
--www.ncicap.org--]