1 00:00:03,203 --> 00:00:05,405 [ Theme music playing ] 2 00:00:05,472 --> 00:00:08,141 [ Laughs ] 3 00:00:08,208 --> 00:00:09,943 [ Lever clicks ] 4 00:00:10,009 --> 00:00:18,618 ♪♪ 5 00:00:18,685 --> 00:00:20,954 Man: It's alive! 6 00:00:21,020 --> 00:00:22,822 [ Robot chicken clucking ] 7 00:00:22,889 --> 00:00:28,728 ♪♪ 8 00:00:28,795 --> 00:00:31,131 [ Laughing evilly ] 9 00:00:31,197 --> 00:00:38,138 ♪♪ 10 00:00:38,204 --> 00:00:39,773 [ Rattling and hissing ] 11 00:00:39,839 --> 00:00:43,443 [ Percussion cacophony plays ] 12 00:00:43,510 --> 00:00:45,512 Do you have any idea how embarrassing it isss 13 00:00:45,578 --> 00:00:48,415 that other rattlesnakes know that I'm related to you? 14 00:00:48,481 --> 00:00:50,850 [ Engine rumbling ] 15 00:00:50,917 --> 00:00:52,752 Whoa, buddy! Where's your parachute?! 16 00:00:52,819 --> 00:00:55,121 I bet my friends 50 bucks that penguins could fly 17 00:00:55,188 --> 00:00:57,957 if they were motivated enough, so here goes! 18 00:00:58,024 --> 00:00:59,526 That literally makes no sense, 19 00:00:59,592 --> 00:01:01,861 and you should wear a parachute because you're wrong. 20 00:01:01,928 --> 00:01:03,363 Didn't you see "Dark Knight Rises"? 21 00:01:03,430 --> 00:01:05,298 You're only motivated to achieve the impossible 22 00:01:05,364 --> 00:01:06,933 once you take off the training wheels, man. 23 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:09,135 Whee! Aw, not again! 24 00:01:09,202 --> 00:01:12,639 Oh, I'm nervous about meeting your family, Mitch. 25 00:01:12,705 --> 00:01:14,541 After all, I'm a Cabbage Patch Kid, 26 00:01:14,607 --> 00:01:17,477 and your family is Garbage Pail Kids. 27 00:01:17,544 --> 00:01:19,279 There's nothing to worry about, Babette Jocelyn. 28 00:01:19,345 --> 00:01:20,814 I love you, so they will, too. 29 00:01:20,880 --> 00:01:22,682 Oh, my baby boy! 30 00:01:22,749 --> 00:01:25,852 And this must be Babette Jocelyn! 31 00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:27,120 Come here, you! 32 00:01:27,187 --> 00:01:29,088 I'm Mitch's mom, Bloody Mary. 33 00:01:29,155 --> 00:01:30,890 Come meet the rest of the family! 34 00:01:30,957 --> 00:01:33,193 This is my hubby, Harry Hemorrhoid. 35 00:01:33,259 --> 00:01:34,527 [ Groaning ] 36 00:01:34,594 --> 00:01:36,128 [ Squish ] 37 00:01:36,196 --> 00:01:38,097 -Hi, Mitch. -Acne Amy! 38 00:01:38,164 --> 00:01:40,333 Wow! You got so tall! Bring it in here. [ Grunts ] 39 00:01:40,400 --> 00:01:41,668 [ Popping, splat ] 40 00:01:41,734 --> 00:01:44,404 [ Gags ] Bathroom? Oh, God. 41 00:01:44,471 --> 00:01:47,039 [ Gagging ] Okay. 42 00:01:47,106 --> 00:01:49,943 [ Groans ] Babette, you can do this. 43 00:01:50,009 --> 00:01:51,044 Just breathe. [ Door opens ] 44 00:01:51,110 --> 00:01:52,579 Outta the way! Get outta the way! 45 00:01:52,645 --> 00:01:53,913 [ Defecating, water splashing ] 46 00:01:53,979 --> 00:01:55,848 Ugh! Whoa! That one's ripe! 47 00:01:55,914 --> 00:01:58,151 Hey! You must be Babette! 48 00:01:58,218 --> 00:02:00,153 I'm Dia-Rita. Nice to... 49 00:02:00,220 --> 00:02:02,455 [ Defecating, water splashing ] Ugh. Meet you. 50 00:02:02,522 --> 00:02:03,790 [ Gagging ] 51 00:02:03,857 --> 00:02:05,058 There you are! Come on. 52 00:02:05,124 --> 00:02:06,926 The rest of the family's waiting to meet you. 53 00:02:06,993 --> 00:02:08,495 [ Crunch ] 54 00:02:08,561 --> 00:02:09,829 [ Smooching ] 55 00:02:09,896 --> 00:02:11,498 [ Crack! ] 56 00:02:11,564 --> 00:02:13,399 ♪♪ 57 00:02:13,466 --> 00:02:14,501 That went great! 58 00:02:14,567 --> 00:02:16,436 My family loves you! I'm so glad. 59 00:02:16,503 --> 00:02:19,839 Oh, Babette, you simply must come back for Thanksgiv-- 60 00:02:19,906 --> 00:02:22,775 I'm sorry. Are you inked? 61 00:02:22,841 --> 00:02:24,811 What? That's just my Xavier Roberts tattoo. 62 00:02:24,878 --> 00:02:27,013 This trollop has tattooed herself 63 00:02:27,079 --> 00:02:28,548 with another man's name! 64 00:02:28,615 --> 00:02:29,749 He's my creator! 65 00:02:29,816 --> 00:02:32,051 Are you in a fucking cult?! 66 00:02:32,118 --> 00:02:34,320 Get out of my house at once! 67 00:02:34,387 --> 00:02:35,655 -Mitch! -Sorry, baby. 68 00:02:35,722 --> 00:02:37,624 My family think tattoos are disgusting, 69 00:02:37,690 --> 00:02:39,726 and I do, too, so y-you better go. 70 00:02:39,792 --> 00:02:41,327 [ Inhales deeply, sobs ] 71 00:02:41,394 --> 00:02:43,563 I got pussed on for you! 72 00:02:43,630 --> 00:02:45,098 Well, looks like I should've got into her pants 73 00:02:45,164 --> 00:02:46,499 earlier, right, fam? 74 00:02:46,566 --> 00:02:48,301 [ Chuckles ] Fuckin' psoriasis. 75 00:02:48,368 --> 00:02:49,668 [ Groans ] Let's see. 76 00:02:49,736 --> 00:02:51,137 Cinderella, you're here for... 77 00:02:51,204 --> 00:02:52,672 You tried to wear glass shoes. 78 00:02:52,739 --> 00:02:55,108 Honey, men don't give a shit about women's footwear. 79 00:02:55,174 --> 00:02:57,210 Next time, Wear, like, a pair of Air Jordans. 80 00:02:57,277 --> 00:02:59,412 That'll get his attention without the personal harm. 81 00:02:59,478 --> 00:03:01,814 -Those are actually pretty sick. -I know, right? 82 00:03:01,881 --> 00:03:04,050 Okay. Let's cut those feet off. 83 00:03:04,117 --> 00:03:06,553 All right. Do you know why I pulled you over? 84 00:03:06,619 --> 00:03:08,655 -No, I do not. -Fuck! 85 00:03:11,424 --> 00:03:13,893 [ Chuckles ] Hey. Look at this Itsy Bitsy ass. 86 00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:16,329 Hey! Where ya goin', Itsy Bitsy?! 87 00:03:16,396 --> 00:03:18,197 -Fuck you! -Eat shit! 88 00:03:18,264 --> 00:03:20,700 -Fuck you! You eat shit! -You eat shit! 89 00:03:20,767 --> 00:03:23,503 I'm-a climb up this garden spout, you fucking asshole! 90 00:03:23,570 --> 00:03:25,638 -Better not! -Better not, asshole! 91 00:03:25,704 --> 00:03:27,674 -It's gonna rain! -Fuck you! 92 00:03:27,740 --> 00:03:29,676 Fuck you! Yeah, fuck you! 93 00:03:29,742 --> 00:03:31,010 I do what I fucking want! 94 00:03:31,077 --> 00:03:33,179 How about that, motherfucker? 95 00:03:33,246 --> 00:03:34,347 Ya told that fuck. 96 00:03:34,414 --> 00:03:35,715 -You told him. -That fuck. 97 00:03:35,781 --> 00:03:37,917 [ Thunder rumbles, Itsy Bitsy screams ] 98 00:03:37,984 --> 00:03:40,353 Oh, look! Shit fuck is back. 99 00:03:40,420 --> 00:03:42,155 -Told ya, you fuck! -Eat shit! 100 00:03:42,221 --> 00:03:44,490 -You eat shit! -Eat shit, you fuck! 101 00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:45,892 [ Birds chirping ] 102 00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:47,994 [ Water dripping ] 103 00:03:49,395 --> 00:03:50,863 The fuck you doin' now? 104 00:03:50,930 --> 00:03:53,399 I'm-a climb up this garden spout and fuck yo' mama! 105 00:03:53,466 --> 00:03:54,601 Fuckin' kill you, you fuck! 106 00:03:54,667 --> 00:03:56,102 These is prison rules, motherfucker! 107 00:03:56,168 --> 00:03:57,904 Itsy Bitsy bitch! 108 00:03:57,971 --> 00:04:00,807 [ Dramatic music plays ] 109 00:04:00,873 --> 00:04:02,976 Oh, no, dear Agnarr, we're dead! 110 00:04:03,042 --> 00:04:05,178 Oh, it pains me that our children, 111 00:04:05,244 --> 00:04:07,714 Anna and Elsa, must grow up without us. 112 00:04:07,780 --> 00:04:10,750 Oh, they'll be fine. Dead parents build character. 113 00:04:10,817 --> 00:04:13,286 Yeah, our little Tarzan was raised by gorillas after 114 00:04:13,353 --> 00:04:15,588 we were murdered by a leopard, and he turned out great. 115 00:04:15,655 --> 00:04:18,291 Ah. New dead parents. 116 00:04:18,358 --> 00:04:21,394 You are just in time for tonight's Heaven rave! 117 00:04:21,461 --> 00:04:23,262 Ooh! What's a rave? 118 00:04:23,329 --> 00:04:25,531 [ Dance music thumping, cheerful shouting ] 119 00:04:25,598 --> 00:04:27,867 Oh, this is better than any ball in Arendelle. 120 00:04:27,934 --> 00:04:29,669 I feel so free! 121 00:04:29,736 --> 00:04:31,571 Ow! Ow! Let it go, baby! 122 00:04:31,638 --> 00:04:33,506 Here comes the dump truck. 123 00:04:33,573 --> 00:04:36,476 ♪♪ 124 00:04:36,542 --> 00:04:37,677 [ Snorting ] 125 00:04:37,744 --> 00:04:39,812 I say this pixie dust is quite different 126 00:04:39,879 --> 00:04:41,247 than the snow we're used to back home. 127 00:04:41,314 --> 00:04:43,216 Coral: Hey! Can I get some down here? 128 00:04:43,282 --> 00:04:44,450 [ Toilet flushes ] 129 00:04:44,517 --> 00:04:47,153 I didn't get eaten by a barracuda for nothing! 130 00:04:47,220 --> 00:04:48,755 [ Bionic sound effect plays ] 131 00:04:48,821 --> 00:04:50,790 [ Snorts ] Whoo-oo! 132 00:04:50,857 --> 00:04:53,693 Who wants to butt-chug some Dole Whip?! 133 00:04:53,760 --> 00:04:55,728 [ Indistinct shouting ] 134 00:04:55,795 --> 00:04:56,863 Whoo! 135 00:04:56,929 --> 00:05:00,066 [ Somber music plays ] 136 00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:02,502 I hope they're in a better place. 137 00:05:02,568 --> 00:05:05,304 Me too, Anna. Me too. 138 00:05:05,371 --> 00:05:07,040 Iduna: I just did my first butt chug! 139 00:05:07,106 --> 00:05:09,475 Agnarr: Being a dead parent rules! 140 00:05:09,542 --> 00:05:11,778 Barbie, I must go. I can't do this anymore. 141 00:05:11,844 --> 00:05:13,546 Why, Ken? Why?! 142 00:05:13,613 --> 00:05:17,283 I'm Butterfly Prince Ken. I must go be with my people. 143 00:05:17,350 --> 00:05:19,886 Flap, flap, flap, flap, flap, flap, flap... 144 00:05:19,952 --> 00:05:21,587 Look, Bell, I don't condone bestiality, 145 00:05:21,654 --> 00:05:23,623 but the fact of the matter is if you fuck a dog, 146 00:05:23,690 --> 00:05:25,725 you're going to get a yeast infection. 147 00:05:25,792 --> 00:05:29,529 Welcome, viewers! I am Dexter, boy genius! 148 00:05:29,595 --> 00:05:32,732 Today I present to you an extraordinary invention! 149 00:05:32,799 --> 00:05:36,903 This is the Mom Droid, a revolutionary new robot 150 00:05:36,969 --> 00:05:38,371 who does anything a mom can do. 151 00:05:38,438 --> 00:05:40,807 Now let's go to the phones. Hello, Gil. You're on the air. 152 00:05:40,873 --> 00:05:42,008 Gil: Uh, yes. Hello. 153 00:05:42,075 --> 00:05:43,710 First-time caller, longtime listener. 154 00:05:43,776 --> 00:05:45,111 Is she fully functional? 155 00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:46,979 Yes. Of course. She can cook and clean. 156 00:05:47,046 --> 00:05:49,315 Mom Droid, make an omelette du fromage. 157 00:05:49,382 --> 00:05:52,919 Okay. Cool. Um, but how many, uh, thrusts will you get? 158 00:05:52,985 --> 00:05:54,053 Thrusts? 159 00:05:54,120 --> 00:05:55,888 How intensely does she vibrate? 160 00:05:55,955 --> 00:05:57,757 If she is vibrating, something is wrong. 161 00:05:57,824 --> 00:05:59,392 That means she is broken, you idiot. 162 00:05:59,459 --> 00:06:02,361 Okay. But is it easy to clean up, you know, afterwards? 163 00:06:02,428 --> 00:06:04,363 Mom Droid, clean the kitchen. 164 00:06:04,430 --> 00:06:06,232 Awesome. I'll take one for sure. 165 00:06:06,299 --> 00:06:08,701 Excellent! Let's take another caller. Okay. 166 00:06:08,768 --> 00:06:10,002 Schlomo, you're on the air. 167 00:06:10,069 --> 00:06:13,072 Uh, she looks very real. Um, does she feel real? 168 00:06:13,139 --> 00:06:14,507 She feels like your mother. 169 00:06:14,574 --> 00:06:17,009 Okay. Cool. How big are the holes? I'm very large. 170 00:06:17,076 --> 00:06:19,679 She can burn holes into anything with her laser eyes. 171 00:06:19,746 --> 00:06:21,614 Mom Droid, blast that trash! 172 00:06:21,681 --> 00:06:23,483 [ Zapping ] Um, I'll buy one, I guess. 173 00:06:23,549 --> 00:06:25,384 And who does not want the Mom Droid? 174 00:06:25,451 --> 00:06:26,753 Hello, Larb. You're on the air. 175 00:06:26,819 --> 00:06:29,355 Uh, I got a question about the pussy sleeve. 176 00:06:29,422 --> 00:06:31,891 Is it porous? I-I'm sorry. We gotta shut this down. 177 00:06:31,957 --> 00:06:33,726 What?! We're making beaucoup bucks! 178 00:06:33,793 --> 00:06:36,062 Yeah, kid, we're not licensed to sell adult toys 179 00:06:36,129 --> 00:06:37,530 at 4:00 in the afternoon! 180 00:06:37,597 --> 00:06:39,999 She's not a toy! I designed her to look like my real mother. 181 00:06:40,066 --> 00:06:41,667 Come on out, Mom, and say hello. 182 00:06:41,734 --> 00:06:44,036 Ugh. Go to the Lisa Rinna Duster Cardigans! 183 00:06:44,103 --> 00:06:47,106 [ Alarm ringing, ringing stops ] 184 00:06:47,173 --> 00:06:49,207 April 1st?! The Day of Fools! 185 00:06:49,275 --> 00:06:51,677 I pity the fool who participates in April Fools' Day! 186 00:06:51,744 --> 00:06:54,380 There are too many fools to pity on this day! 187 00:06:54,447 --> 00:06:56,249 How about this? Mr. T gonna start his day. 188 00:06:56,315 --> 00:06:57,550 Ha ha! [ Bell dings ] 189 00:06:57,617 --> 00:06:59,418 Hm. Time to check Mr. T's e-mail. 190 00:06:59,485 --> 00:07:02,021 Ah. Look at this here. My friend Gary just e-mailed me 191 00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:03,890 a link to a new children's charity. 192 00:07:04,690 --> 00:07:07,260 Oh! It's a fool's giant ding-a-ling! 193 00:07:07,326 --> 00:07:08,594 I hate this day! 194 00:07:08,661 --> 00:07:10,363 I'm now a fool I pity. 195 00:07:10,429 --> 00:07:12,765 I pity me -- Mr. T! 196 00:07:12,832 --> 00:07:14,801 Announcer: Running a summer camp for kittens 197 00:07:14,867 --> 00:07:16,369 seemed like the perfect business venture. 198 00:07:16,435 --> 00:07:18,304 Oh, they're so cute! 199 00:07:18,371 --> 00:07:20,072 And the best part is Jason Voorhees 200 00:07:20,139 --> 00:07:21,674 should leave us alone this year 201 00:07:21,741 --> 00:07:23,709 since he didn't suffer any childhood psychological trauma 202 00:07:23,776 --> 00:07:25,511 related to kittens. That we know of. 203 00:07:25,578 --> 00:07:26,913 But little did they know... 204 00:07:26,979 --> 00:07:29,282 Woman: Teenagers are filthy, Jason! 205 00:07:29,348 --> 00:07:32,718 Greasy hormones spewing all over the place! 206 00:07:32,784 --> 00:07:34,987 They must be punished! 207 00:07:35,054 --> 00:07:37,657 [ Snoring ] 208 00:07:37,723 --> 00:07:40,827 Okay. This teenager's a fucking dork. Next window. 209 00:07:40,893 --> 00:07:42,161 [ Cats purring and meowing ] 210 00:07:42,228 --> 00:07:44,931 Aah! Sluts! Kitten sluts! 211 00:07:44,997 --> 00:07:47,133 [ Cats yowling, knife plunging ] 212 00:07:49,235 --> 00:07:51,337 [ Sniffles ] 213 00:07:55,241 --> 00:07:56,609 Announcer: Somewhere along the way, 214 00:07:56,676 --> 00:07:58,477 these movies stopped being shocking, 215 00:07:58,544 --> 00:08:01,013 but we're pretty sure we're onto something here. 216 00:08:01,080 --> 00:08:02,481 [ Monitors beeping ] 217 00:08:02,548 --> 00:08:05,051 Ha ha! Welcome to my house. 218 00:08:05,117 --> 00:08:06,485 Why is it full of sick kids? 219 00:08:06,552 --> 00:08:09,121 Oh, that's not your thing? What -- What -- What's your thing? 220 00:08:09,188 --> 00:08:11,190 Sexy clowns. Mm! 221 00:08:11,257 --> 00:08:12,825 Alright. Well, that -- that checks out. 222 00:08:12,892 --> 00:08:14,627 Well, h-help me wheel them out onto the lawn. 223 00:08:14,694 --> 00:08:16,696 The sprinklers don't kick on for another 20 minutes. 224 00:08:16,762 --> 00:08:19,732 Why do you smell like Mommy's acid-washed jean jacket 225 00:08:19,799 --> 00:08:22,835 when she comes home from the Morongo Casino, Resort & Spa? 226 00:08:22,902 --> 00:08:24,503 Good times! 227 00:08:24,570 --> 00:08:26,138 Shut the fuck up and go back to sleep! 228 00:08:26,205 --> 00:08:27,740 I'm gonna -- Yeah. This is creepy. Bye. 229 00:08:27,807 --> 00:08:30,343 W-Where are you going?! Come on. Where you go-- Ugh. 230 00:08:30,409 --> 00:08:32,510 Okay. Your chart says you sold your soul to hook up with 231 00:08:32,578 --> 00:08:35,748 a dude you met in a shipwreck, and now you can't talk. 232 00:08:35,815 --> 00:08:38,251 Kids will do anything to get to bone town these days, huh? 233 00:08:38,317 --> 00:08:41,888 Now, say, "Ahh." Say, "Ahh." 234 00:08:41,953 --> 00:08:44,090 Can you do that? Oh, right. Right. 235 00:08:44,155 --> 00:08:46,158 Sorry. It's been a very long day. 236 00:08:46,225 --> 00:08:48,160 [ Crickets chirping faintly ] 237 00:08:50,396 --> 00:08:52,365 [ Clicking, message bloops ] 238 00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:58,671 [ Clicking, message bloops ] 239 00:08:58,738 --> 00:09:00,239 [ Owl hoots ] 240 00:09:05,177 --> 00:09:07,013 [ Clicking, message bloops ] 241 00:09:10,983 --> 00:09:13,286 [ Romantic music swells ] 242 00:09:13,352 --> 00:09:14,854 [ Music stops ] 243 00:09:20,293 --> 00:09:23,029 [ Owl hoots ] 244 00:09:23,095 --> 00:09:25,331 [ Clicking, message bloops, phone buzzes ] 245 00:09:25,398 --> 00:09:27,800 [ Clicking, message bloops, phone buzzes ] 246 00:09:35,274 --> 00:09:37,310 [ Clicking, message bloops, phone buzzes ] 247 00:09:42,081 --> 00:09:45,318 [ Clicking, message bloops, phone buzzes ] 248 00:09:45,384 --> 00:09:47,486 [ Clicking, message bloops, phone buzzes ] 249 00:09:52,325 --> 00:09:54,360 [ Clicking, message bloops, phone buzzes ] 250 00:10:02,068 --> 00:10:04,270 [ Clicking, message bloops, phone buzzes ] 251 00:10:13,813 --> 00:10:15,848 [ Clicking, message bloops, phone buzzes ] 252 00:10:15,915 --> 00:10:16,983 Chicken: ♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪ 253 00:10:17,049 --> 00:10:18,217 ♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪ 254 00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:20,052 ♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ♪ 255 00:10:20,119 --> 00:10:21,287 Chickens: ♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪ 256 00:10:21,354 --> 00:10:22,521 ♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪ 257 00:10:22,588 --> 00:10:24,390 ♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ♪ 258 00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:25,524 ♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪ 259 00:10:25,591 --> 00:10:26,759 ♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪ 260 00:10:26,826 --> 00:10:28,627 ♪ Ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ♪ 261 00:10:28,694 --> 00:10:29,729 Chicken: Ba-gawk! 262 00:10:29,795 --> 00:10:31,197 Man: Bawk. 263 00:10:32,932 --> 00:10:35,468 -I don't see him! -Ha! I knew he wouldn't do it. 264 00:10:35,534 --> 00:10:36,869 Give me all your money, penguins! 265 00:10:36,936 --> 00:10:38,037 Oh, no! 266 00:10:38,104 --> 00:10:40,940 Penguin: I can't fly! Splat! 267 00:10:41,007 --> 00:10:42,675 Wow! He saved us! 268 00:10:42,742 --> 00:10:44,677 Just like Batman! 269 00:10:49,715 --> 00:10:52,685 So, uh, what? We ding his estate for the 50 bucks? 270 00:10:52,752 --> 00:10:54,620 Yeah. Let's go confront his widow.