1 00:00:03,269 --> 00:00:09,509 ♪♪ 2 00:00:09,576 --> 00:00:12,078 Hi! Welcome to the "Robot Chicken" holiday -- 3 00:00:12,145 --> 00:00:14,214 Aah! 4 00:00:19,419 --> 00:00:20,754 [ Train whistle blows ] 5 00:00:20,820 --> 00:00:22,756 Porter: Thank you for traveling the North Pole Express, 6 00:00:22,822 --> 00:00:25,392 famous for its very low rate of passenger murders. 7 00:00:25,458 --> 00:00:27,861 You'll never be murdered on the North Pole Express. 8 00:00:27,927 --> 00:00:29,396 Don't forget to tip your porter. 9 00:00:29,462 --> 00:00:30,697 I almost missed this train. 10 00:00:30,764 --> 00:00:32,732 I got on the Polar Express by mistake. 11 00:00:32,799 --> 00:00:34,367 They're different trains, you see. 12 00:00:34,434 --> 00:00:37,904 I shall sit over there now. 13 00:00:37,971 --> 00:00:39,372 So when we're on the crapper, 14 00:00:39,439 --> 00:00:41,074 you think it drops out on to the tracks? 15 00:00:41,141 --> 00:00:43,910 I shall sit over there now. 16 00:00:43,977 --> 00:00:47,580 [ Train whistle blows ] 17 00:00:47,647 --> 00:00:49,149 So you see, it's a different train. 18 00:00:49,215 --> 00:00:50,650 Help! 19 00:00:50,717 --> 00:00:52,018 What's that? Geez! 20 00:00:52,085 --> 00:00:54,788 Santa's dead! 21 00:00:54,854 --> 00:00:56,790 Oh, what a shame, suicide. 22 00:00:56,856 --> 00:00:57,724 Are you crazy? 23 00:00:57,791 --> 00:00:59,559 He was murdered. Oh, no. 24 00:00:59,626 --> 00:01:01,361 There goes our zero murder rate. 25 00:01:01,428 --> 00:01:02,328 Jesus! 26 00:01:02,395 --> 00:01:04,230 Ask and you shall receive. 27 00:01:04,297 --> 00:01:05,698 Holy shit! 28 00:01:05,765 --> 00:01:07,834 There's a killer on board. We need to get off this train. 29 00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:10,203 Nobody gets off this train until the villain is caught. 30 00:01:10,270 --> 00:01:11,704 Jesus, can you help us? 31 00:01:11,771 --> 00:01:16,509 I can, and I will, and I'll even do it without my magic. 32 00:01:16,576 --> 00:01:17,811 It would be faster with your magic. 33 00:01:17,877 --> 00:01:20,180 Dad, take away my magic. 34 00:01:21,481 --> 00:01:23,049 Now, let's solve this case. 35 00:01:23,116 --> 00:01:24,050 ♪ Do, do, do 36 00:01:24,117 --> 00:01:26,085 ♪ Inspector Jesus on the case ♪ 37 00:01:26,152 --> 00:01:27,086 Let's see. 38 00:01:27,152 --> 00:01:28,822 Are you a butler? Did you do it? 39 00:01:28,888 --> 00:01:30,723 You don't get be porter of the year 40 00:01:30,789 --> 00:01:33,359 three years running by killing passengers 41 00:01:33,426 --> 00:01:35,128 unless you kill them with good service. 42 00:01:35,195 --> 00:01:36,329 Wink. 43 00:01:36,396 --> 00:01:37,630 Are you done? Yes, sir, I am. 44 00:01:37,697 --> 00:01:39,164 Good because you're an inconsequential 45 00:01:39,232 --> 00:01:40,567 character anyway. Everybody out! 46 00:01:40,633 --> 00:01:43,136 You are contaminating my crime scene. 47 00:01:45,572 --> 00:01:47,307 [ Train whistle blows ] 48 00:01:47,372 --> 00:01:49,676 Is this one of those dinner murder mystery things? 49 00:01:49,741 --> 00:01:50,877 Can I be the sexy maid? 50 00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:52,579 How about you just be the suspect? 51 00:01:52,645 --> 00:01:53,847 What time did you board the train? 52 00:01:53,913 --> 00:01:55,715 Well, I got on two trains. 53 00:01:55,782 --> 00:01:57,517 Which one did you mean? 54 00:01:57,584 --> 00:01:58,985 Are those whipping scars? 55 00:01:59,051 --> 00:02:02,589 Santa whipped you to deliver presents faster, didn't he? 56 00:02:02,655 --> 00:02:03,957 That's a motive. 57 00:02:04,023 --> 00:02:05,558 No, no, no, we all enjoyed the whipping. 58 00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:06,626 Hmm. 59 00:02:06,693 --> 00:02:07,926 Do you want to know about the drugs? 60 00:02:07,994 --> 00:02:10,029 I was just about to ask you that. 61 00:02:10,096 --> 00:02:12,065 Oh, Santa has been doping us for years. 62 00:02:12,131 --> 00:02:13,800 You see, he wants us bigger and stronger 63 00:02:13,867 --> 00:02:15,368 'cause there's more and more people in the world 64 00:02:15,435 --> 00:02:18,071 which means more presents and a heavier sleigh. 65 00:02:18,137 --> 00:02:20,006 You know, I think I'm okay today if you don't want to -- 66 00:02:20,740 --> 00:02:23,076 [ Growling ] [ Deep voice ] Oh, yeah, baby. 67 00:02:23,142 --> 00:02:24,744 [ Normal voice ] You've never seen what that juice can do. 68 00:02:24,811 --> 00:02:26,412 That's how we lost Prancer. 69 00:02:26,478 --> 00:02:27,647 Aah! 70 00:02:27,714 --> 00:02:28,681 [ Smooches ] Yep. 71 00:02:28,748 --> 00:02:30,450 That's a reason to kill Santa for sure. 72 00:02:30,517 --> 00:02:33,453 Steroids cost a fortune, lots of money moving around, 73 00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:37,323 and in any crime, you follow the money. 74 00:02:37,390 --> 00:02:38,992 Oh, that's right. 75 00:02:39,058 --> 00:02:40,660 Blame the nutcracker Jew. 76 00:02:40,727 --> 00:02:41,995 There's a Jew? Can I meet him? 77 00:02:42,061 --> 00:02:43,228 I wouldn't kill Santa. 78 00:02:43,296 --> 00:02:44,898 He saved my life. 79 00:02:44,964 --> 00:02:46,432 Nutcrackers were the Cabbage Patch Kids 80 00:02:46,499 --> 00:02:47,901 of our time, but after Woolly Willy 81 00:02:47,966 --> 00:02:49,035 came out, it was all over. 82 00:02:49,102 --> 00:02:50,537 Woman: What did Santa bring you, honey? 83 00:02:50,603 --> 00:02:52,238 Firewood. Nutcracker: I felt worthless. 84 00:02:52,305 --> 00:02:55,708 I was unemployable, but Santa said my little fist hands 85 00:02:55,775 --> 00:02:57,510 were perfect for crunching numbers, 86 00:02:57,577 --> 00:02:59,178 and he gave me a job. 87 00:02:59,245 --> 00:03:01,481 A job that can afford that mink hat, 88 00:03:01,548 --> 00:03:04,083 that Rolex, that diamond pentagram? 89 00:03:04,150 --> 00:03:08,353 It's the Star of David, and yes, I embezzled a skosh, 90 00:03:08,421 --> 00:03:10,089 but I made Santa so much money. 91 00:03:10,156 --> 00:03:12,025 I mean, who would begrudge a little for myself? 92 00:03:12,091 --> 00:03:13,860 And boom goes the motive. 93 00:03:13,927 --> 00:03:17,063 Santa caught you, so he had to die. [ Laughs ] 94 00:03:17,130 --> 00:03:20,600 Solving crimes, typical Jesus, just like in the Bible. 95 00:03:20,667 --> 00:03:21,768 What are you, mashugana? 96 00:03:21,834 --> 00:03:23,469 I wouldn't kill my cash cow. 97 00:03:23,536 --> 00:03:24,837 There's a cow? Can I meet him? 98 00:03:24,904 --> 00:03:26,773 But we know you're capable of murder 99 00:03:26,839 --> 00:03:29,609 because, spoiler alert, the Jews killed me. 100 00:03:29,676 --> 00:03:32,712 [ Stigmatas whistling to tune of "Jingle Bells" ] 101 00:03:36,649 --> 00:03:38,451 Jews didn't kill Jesus, Jesus. 102 00:03:38,518 --> 00:03:39,686 That's racism. 103 00:03:39,752 --> 00:03:41,387 You're right. 104 00:03:41,454 --> 00:03:43,423 I'm sorry. 105 00:03:43,489 --> 00:03:51,331 ♪♪ 106 00:03:51,397 --> 00:03:52,565 What are we doing? 107 00:03:52,632 --> 00:03:54,767 Wasting time. This crime is unsolvable, 108 00:03:54,834 --> 00:03:57,203 like Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Burgundy. 109 00:03:57,270 --> 00:04:00,173 Huh, got something to say, Santa's arch nemesis? 110 00:04:00,239 --> 00:04:01,274 I never hated Santa. 111 00:04:01,341 --> 00:04:02,375 I just hate children. 112 00:04:02,442 --> 00:04:03,943 Ain't that right. Well, of course you do. 113 00:04:04,010 --> 00:04:05,278 Yep, that's why I got my tubes tied. 114 00:04:05,345 --> 00:04:07,246 Santa and I used to be a comedy team. 115 00:04:07,313 --> 00:04:09,182 We went by Fatty and the Kramp. 116 00:04:09,248 --> 00:04:10,516 We were huge in the Catskills. 117 00:04:10,583 --> 00:04:12,652 Hey, Krampus, what is mistletoe? 118 00:04:12,719 --> 00:04:13,620 It's not a missile. 119 00:04:13,686 --> 00:04:15,421 It's not a toe. 120 00:04:15,488 --> 00:04:17,156 Hey, maybe you beat children with it. 121 00:04:17,223 --> 00:04:18,858 [ Crowd booing ] [ Laughs ] 122 00:04:18,925 --> 00:04:21,194 You know what? I'm just done with this. 123 00:04:21,260 --> 00:04:22,395 Ah, we stayed friends. 124 00:04:22,462 --> 00:04:25,665 ♪ It always hurts to sleigh goodbye ♪ 125 00:04:25,732 --> 00:04:29,402 [ Yodeling ] Oh, flood! 126 00:04:29,469 --> 00:04:30,536 [ Brakes screeching ] 127 00:04:30,603 --> 00:04:31,904 Aah! 128 00:04:31,971 --> 00:04:33,840 ♪ Avalanche won't stop Detective Jesus ♪ 129 00:04:33,906 --> 00:04:35,875 ♪ Avalanche can't stop Inspector Jesus ♪ 130 00:04:35,942 --> 00:04:37,810 Oh, trapped, huh? 131 00:04:37,877 --> 00:04:40,079 Oh, I'm going to enjoy watching you meat puppets 132 00:04:40,146 --> 00:04:41,280 devour Santa's corpse. 133 00:04:41,347 --> 00:04:42,749 To get rid of the evidence! 134 00:04:42,815 --> 00:04:45,752 Santa deserves it for what he did to my people. 135 00:04:45,818 --> 00:04:48,254 The North Pole did not always belong to Santa. 136 00:04:48,321 --> 00:04:51,290 My people once roamed the land by the thousands 137 00:04:51,357 --> 00:04:53,526 before the Iron Sleigh arrived. 138 00:04:53,593 --> 00:04:56,529 The white-bearded man promised to share the land, 139 00:04:56,596 --> 00:04:58,097 but we were displaced. 140 00:04:58,164 --> 00:05:01,401 Our noseless faces were defiled with carrots, 141 00:05:01,467 --> 00:05:05,238 our pristine bald heads covered with top hats. 142 00:05:05,304 --> 00:05:08,274 It was a nightmare. 143 00:05:08,341 --> 00:05:09,909 Wow, your flashback sucked. 144 00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:12,545 Oh, does genocide bum you out? 145 00:05:12,612 --> 00:05:15,014 So you killed Santa to avenge your people. 146 00:05:15,081 --> 00:05:16,482 Doesn't matter anymore. 147 00:05:16,549 --> 00:05:20,086 In 10 years, the North Pole will be lost to us both. 148 00:05:20,153 --> 00:05:23,189 Oh, here we go with the global warming bullshit. 149 00:05:23,256 --> 00:05:25,792 Inconsequential character my ass. 150 00:05:25,858 --> 00:05:28,394 I am the goddamn hero of this story. 151 00:05:28,461 --> 00:05:30,196 Eh, you're a "C" plot at best. 152 00:05:30,263 --> 00:05:32,131 Wait a minute. Where there's crumbs, 153 00:05:32,198 --> 00:05:34,000 there's crimes every time. 154 00:05:34,067 --> 00:05:35,735 Inspector Jesus! 155 00:05:35,802 --> 00:05:37,570 Not so fast, Ginger Spice. 156 00:05:37,637 --> 00:05:40,306 Earlier, I saw crumbs outside Santa's door. 157 00:05:40,373 --> 00:05:41,874 That puts you at the scene. 158 00:05:41,941 --> 00:05:43,242 I was with him last night. 159 00:05:43,308 --> 00:05:45,378 Last I checked, crumbing's not a crime, baby Jesus. 160 00:05:45,445 --> 00:05:47,480 But adultery is. Um, it is not. 161 00:05:47,547 --> 00:05:48,548 It's not? It is not. 162 00:05:48,614 --> 00:05:49,782 Well, it's not cool. 163 00:05:49,849 --> 00:05:51,150 You wanted him all for yourself, 164 00:05:51,217 --> 00:05:53,419 but he wouldn't leave his wife, so you killed him. 165 00:05:53,486 --> 00:05:55,521 I was fulfilling my dream of singing my heart 166 00:05:55,588 --> 00:05:58,457 out for strangers when Big Red walked into my life. 167 00:05:58,524 --> 00:06:01,961 ♪ Remember to grease my pan 168 00:06:02,028 --> 00:06:05,164 ♪ Give me all of your loving ♪ 169 00:06:05,231 --> 00:06:08,634 ♪ Because you're my number-one man ♪ 170 00:06:08,701 --> 00:06:11,137 [ Cheers and applause ] 171 00:06:11,204 --> 00:06:13,473 You've got a secret ingredient, kid, 172 00:06:13,539 --> 00:06:16,309 but it takes more than talent to bake a star. 173 00:06:16,375 --> 00:06:18,311 B-d-d-d-d-d! [ Chuckles ] 174 00:06:18,377 --> 00:06:21,280 Finally, the world would hear my music. 175 00:06:21,347 --> 00:06:23,382 [ Hip-hop music plays ] [ Rapping ] ♪ NPFL 176 00:06:23,449 --> 00:06:24,617 ♪ North Pole For Life 177 00:06:24,684 --> 00:06:26,052 ♪ DJ on the mike, Clause ♪ 178 00:06:26,119 --> 00:06:29,122 ♪ On the ones and twos North Pole Productions, bitch ♪ 179 00:06:29,188 --> 00:06:30,356 ♪ Don't forget about Dre 180 00:06:30,423 --> 00:06:32,457 But creative differences ruined everything. 181 00:06:32,525 --> 00:06:33,626 Young man: Extra, extra! 182 00:06:33,693 --> 00:06:36,129 Santa's album sells zero copies, also 9/11! 183 00:06:36,195 --> 00:06:38,865 So you killed him? I loved him. 184 00:06:38,931 --> 00:06:40,433 Loved? 185 00:06:40,500 --> 00:06:42,101 Okay, he was repulsive. 186 00:06:42,168 --> 00:06:44,337 His balls were like chestnuts roasted over an open fire, 187 00:06:44,403 --> 00:06:45,304 and his dick wasn't even 188 00:06:45,371 --> 00:06:47,473 ♪ Five inches long 189 00:06:47,540 --> 00:06:48,608 Gross. 190 00:06:48,674 --> 00:06:49,876 How do I know you didn't kill him? 191 00:06:49,942 --> 00:06:52,078 You with your big, strong arms. Do you work out? 192 00:06:52,145 --> 00:06:52,945 I do CrossFit. 193 00:06:53,012 --> 00:06:54,413 [ All groan ] Nailed it! 194 00:06:54,480 --> 00:06:56,616 Sorry, doll, you're not the first to be compelled 195 00:06:56,682 --> 00:06:58,050 by the power of Christ. 196 00:06:58,117 --> 00:06:59,752 You know, it could've been Jesus. 197 00:06:59,819 --> 00:07:01,053 Santa was his father. 198 00:07:01,120 --> 00:07:02,655 What? He was not my father. 199 00:07:02,722 --> 00:07:04,524 I thought Jesus was Santa's son, too. 200 00:07:04,590 --> 00:07:05,725 I'm not Santa's kid. 201 00:07:05,792 --> 00:07:07,160 I'm God's kid. 202 00:07:07,226 --> 00:07:09,228 Okay, I'm going to let you fucking idiots work this out 203 00:07:09,295 --> 00:07:11,764 and go look for some more clues by myself. 204 00:07:11,831 --> 00:07:12,865 Solving crimes! 205 00:07:14,567 --> 00:07:16,302 [ Train whistle blows ] 206 00:07:16,369 --> 00:07:17,303 [ Clanging ] Ow! 207 00:07:17,370 --> 00:07:19,005 What -- what the fuck? 208 00:07:19,071 --> 00:07:20,640 [ Clanging ] My feet! 209 00:07:20,706 --> 00:07:22,642 Who the fuck is doing this? 210 00:07:22,707 --> 00:07:23,776 [ Squeaking ] 211 00:07:23,843 --> 00:07:26,312 Real mature, guys. 212 00:07:26,379 --> 00:07:28,848 CrossFit! 213 00:07:28,915 --> 00:07:31,117 ♪ Inspector Jesus chasing the killer ♪ 214 00:07:31,184 --> 00:07:32,652 ♪ Don't need magic to catch him ♪ 215 00:07:32,718 --> 00:07:33,719 Jesus! 216 00:07:33,786 --> 00:07:35,855 Surprised I'm not dead, Peppermint? 217 00:07:35,922 --> 00:07:38,858 Well, it's not the first time I've been "double crossed." 218 00:07:38,925 --> 00:07:39,992 -That's offensive. -Nailed it twice. 219 00:07:40,058 --> 00:07:41,594 I knew if I went off by myself, 220 00:07:41,661 --> 00:07:45,097 the real killer would make a move, and so she has. 221 00:07:45,164 --> 00:07:47,266 I didn't do it. 222 00:07:48,534 --> 00:07:49,969 Oh, God. 223 00:07:50,036 --> 00:07:53,506 Peppermint is the killer, and Jesus for the win. 224 00:07:53,573 --> 00:07:55,141 She hated Santa! 225 00:07:55,207 --> 00:07:57,743 She told me it was hell in that toy factory -- 226 00:07:57,810 --> 00:08:00,313 no safety regulations, no bathroom breaks, 227 00:08:00,379 --> 00:08:01,681 no casual Fridays. 228 00:08:01,747 --> 00:08:04,483 It got so bad Santa had to install suicide nets. 229 00:08:04,550 --> 00:08:06,552 Thought you'd take a break, huh? Well, back to work. 230 00:08:06,619 --> 00:08:10,089 Nutcracker: She tried to unionize, but Santa hired a strike-busting Bumble, 231 00:08:10,156 --> 00:08:11,424 and Bumbles bounce your head 232 00:08:11,490 --> 00:08:13,125 against the curve if you unionize. 233 00:08:13,192 --> 00:08:14,293 I'm not going down for this. 234 00:08:14,360 --> 00:08:15,261 The truth is -- 235 00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:16,963 [ Gunshot ] 236 00:08:17,029 --> 00:08:19,732 [ Slow-motion scream ] 237 00:08:22,468 --> 00:08:23,603 Who did that? 238 00:08:23,669 --> 00:08:25,204 Don't look at me, baby. 239 00:08:25,271 --> 00:08:27,473 [ Train whistle blows ] 240 00:08:27,540 --> 00:08:28,975 Porter, please tell the authorities 241 00:08:29,041 --> 00:08:30,409 to be waiting at the next station. 242 00:08:30,476 --> 00:08:32,845 I, Jesus Christ, without using any magic, 243 00:08:32,912 --> 00:08:34,013 have solved the crime. 244 00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:35,581 You know who the killer is? 245 00:08:35,648 --> 00:08:37,283 What did I just say? 246 00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:39,385 You said, "Porter, please tell the authorities -- " 247 00:08:39,452 --> 00:08:40,852 All: Shut up, Comet! 248 00:08:40,919 --> 00:08:44,857 Let me show you what happened in our most exciting flashback yet. 249 00:08:44,924 --> 00:08:46,392 [ Knock on door ] Santa's door wasn't forced 250 00:08:46,459 --> 00:08:48,961 because he opened it himself for friends. 251 00:08:49,028 --> 00:08:50,363 [ Laughs ] Hello. 252 00:08:50,429 --> 00:08:52,531 Stab! For the pole. 253 00:08:52,598 --> 00:08:54,200 -For the pole. -For the pole. 254 00:08:54,267 --> 00:08:56,202 Fucking Carrot. For the pole. 255 00:08:56,269 --> 00:08:58,137 [ Groans ] For the -- for the -- 256 00:08:58,204 --> 00:08:59,238 for the pole. 257 00:08:59,305 --> 00:09:00,673 There we go. 258 00:09:02,174 --> 00:09:03,075 For the pole. 259 00:09:03,142 --> 00:09:04,410 [ Gagging ] 260 00:09:06,445 --> 00:09:07,513 You can't prove any of it. 261 00:09:07,580 --> 00:09:09,148 I can prove any of it. 262 00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:11,284 Krampus, your ukulele was out of tune, 263 00:09:11,350 --> 00:09:14,053 exactly the way it would be if you stabbed someone with it. 264 00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:16,322 Snowball, you're melting due to global warming, 265 00:09:16,389 --> 00:09:19,292 and there was a small puddle of water near the body. 266 00:09:19,358 --> 00:09:21,294 Nutsy, you're a Jew. Hey! 267 00:09:21,360 --> 00:09:24,163 Ginger, I believe this belongs to you. 268 00:09:24,230 --> 00:09:25,564 Oh, fuck. 269 00:09:25,631 --> 00:09:26,766 Ooh, what about me? 270 00:09:26,832 --> 00:09:28,935 You've got tiny bits of entrails on your antlers. 271 00:09:29,001 --> 00:09:30,503 Yay, I'm implicated! 272 00:09:30,569 --> 00:09:32,571 And Peppermint, she's dead. 273 00:09:32,638 --> 00:09:35,508 So now we know all the reasons they wanted to kill Santa. 274 00:09:35,574 --> 00:09:36,776 Yes. All: No! 275 00:09:36,842 --> 00:09:38,477 No? The truth is we were all 276 00:09:38,544 --> 00:09:40,413 in a fantasy football league together. 277 00:09:40,479 --> 00:09:42,515 Santa was checking his naughty and nice list 278 00:09:42,581 --> 00:09:44,417 to guess which players could be suspended, 279 00:09:44,483 --> 00:09:46,185 thereby predicting the spread. 280 00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:48,187 He cheated, and he deserved to die. 281 00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:51,757 So he died for the greatest sin of all, 282 00:09:51,824 --> 00:09:54,327 giving a shit about fake football. 283 00:09:54,393 --> 00:09:57,563 But without you, Jesus, we go free. 284 00:09:57,630 --> 00:10:02,702 ♪♪ 285 00:10:02,768 --> 00:10:07,840 ♪♪ 286 00:10:07,907 --> 00:10:09,775 Ow! 287 00:10:10,643 --> 00:10:12,211 Oh, fuck no. 288 00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:14,513 Jesus magic, I'm back, baby! 289 00:10:14,580 --> 00:10:19,719 I hope that you enjoyed your time on the North Pole Express. 290 00:10:19,785 --> 00:10:20,720 It was all right. 291 00:10:20,786 --> 00:10:22,154 Three and a half fishes, I'd say. 292 00:10:22,221 --> 00:10:23,122 [ Groans ] 293 00:10:23,189 --> 00:10:26,058 Wow, suicide. 294 00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:27,994 Ow, ow, these pinch! 295 00:10:28,060 --> 00:10:30,696 Another murder mystery solved by 296 00:10:30,763 --> 00:10:32,732 ♪ Inspector Jesus, solving crimes ♪ 297 00:10:32,798 --> 00:10:33,733 ♪ Boo-yah 298 00:10:33,799 --> 00:10:35,234 You did it, my friend. 299 00:10:35,301 --> 00:10:36,936 Cheese and crackers, you're alive? 300 00:10:37,003 --> 00:10:39,305 I was in the locomotive the whole time, 301 00:10:39,372 --> 00:10:41,240 pulling a train, if you know what I mean. 302 00:10:41,307 --> 00:10:42,942 Comet: You know there are two trains? 303 00:10:43,009 --> 00:10:45,044 Then whose body was in your cabin? 304 00:10:45,111 --> 00:10:46,746 Tim Allen. 305 00:10:46,812 --> 00:10:49,682 Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho! [ Laughs ] 306 00:10:49,749 --> 00:10:52,818 Hello, Tim? Tim Allen? [ Grunts confusedly ] 307 00:10:52,885 --> 00:10:54,754 Ah, yeah, that bit is going strong. 308 00:10:54,820 --> 00:10:57,223 Who would have thought? [ Laugh-grunts ] 309 00:10:57,289 --> 00:10:59,025 Moving on, do you want to help me with something, Tim? 310 00:10:59,091 --> 00:11:00,192 [ Grunts questioningly ] 311 00:11:00,259 --> 00:11:01,961 Don't worry, Tim. This will be the safest ride 312 00:11:02,028 --> 00:11:03,696 you've ever taken, and just in case, 313 00:11:03,763 --> 00:11:06,198 I took out a billion-dollar life-insurance policy.