1
00:00:04,537 --> 00:00:07,307
[THUNDER]

2
00:00:08,441 --> 00:00:10,310
[DRILL WHIRRING]

3
00:00:11,511 --> 00:00:13,246
[ELECTRIC SAW BUZZING]

4
00:00:17,784 --> 00:00:19,953
- IT'S ALIVE!

5
00:00:28,128 --> 00:00:29,963
[THUNDER]

6
00:00:30,330 --> 00:00:34,667
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP

7
00:00:40,340 --> 00:00:41,007
- [GASPS]

8
00:00:41,074 --> 00:00:44,677
- THAT BETTER NOT BE POO.

9
00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:49,349
- HA HA HA HA HA!

10
00:00:49,416 --> 00:00:51,851
THAT'LL TEACH YOU
TO VOTE FOR NADER!

11
00:00:51,918 --> 00:00:54,020
HA HA HA HA--HUH?

12
00:00:54,087 --> 00:00:56,456
WHAT THE HELL?

13
00:00:57,757 --> 00:01:00,994
- I GOT LAID!
I GOT LAID!

14
00:01:01,060 --> 00:01:02,228
I GOT LAID!

15
00:01:02,295 --> 00:01:04,397
- WHAT CAN I SAY?
NERDS ARE HOT.

16
00:01:04,464 --> 00:01:06,065
- GONNA TELL THE INTERNET.
LAID! LAID! LAID!

17
00:01:06,132 --> 00:01:09,436
L-A-Y-E-D! LAID, LAID, LAID,
LAID, LAID, LAID, LAID, LAID!

18
00:01:09,502 --> 00:01:11,104
- MMM. HOT.

19
00:01:11,170 --> 00:01:14,841
- SIMON SAYS...
GO PLAY IN TRAFFIC.

20
00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:16,009
- YAY!

21
00:01:16,075 --> 00:01:18,077
- YOU KNOW, MOVIE PRODUCER
DEAN DEVLIN,

22
00:01:18,144 --> 00:01:21,748
I ALWAYS FELT BAD ABOUT SCREWING
MILLIONS OF MOVIEGOERS

23
00:01:21,815 --> 00:01:22,916
OUT OF THEIR HARD-EARNED MONEY

24
00:01:22,982 --> 00:01:25,285
WITH THAT STEAMING PILE OF CRAP
WE MADE CALLED "GODZILLA."

25
00:01:25,351 --> 00:01:28,655
- I KNOW, ROLAND EMMERICH.
WE SHOULD TOTALLY REMAKE IT.

26
00:01:28,721 --> 00:01:31,090
- A REMAKE OF A REMAKE?

27
00:01:31,157 --> 00:01:32,725
- BRILLIANT!

28
00:01:34,860 --> 00:01:36,429
- THE EGGS ARE HATCHING!

29
00:01:36,496 --> 00:01:39,466
RUN! RUN!
- [GROWLING]

30
00:01:41,835 --> 00:01:42,769
- AAH!

31
00:01:42,836 --> 00:01:46,206
- [GROWLING]

32
00:01:47,006 --> 00:01:49,809
[SCREECHING]

33
00:01:49,876 --> 00:01:51,377
- WHEW.

34
00:01:51,610 --> 00:01:55,782
[GASPS]
- [GROWLING]

35
00:02:04,157 --> 00:02:06,893
[DISCO MUSIC PLAYING]

36
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[MUSIC STOPS]
- WE GAVE YOU JERKS $150 MILLION
TO REMAKE "GODZILLA"

37
00:02:25,144 --> 00:02:28,047
AND YOU GAVE US
A STEAMING PILE OF CRAP!

38
00:02:28,114 --> 00:02:29,682
AGAIN!

39
00:02:31,017 --> 00:02:32,652
- YES!

40
00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:35,688
- THE ONLY THING WE HAVE TO FEAR

41
00:02:35,755 --> 00:02:37,624
IS FEAR ITSELF.

42
00:02:37,690 --> 00:02:38,691
- AND SPIDERS.

43
00:02:38,758 --> 00:02:43,530
- WELL, YES, AND SPIDERS.
THAT GOES WITHOUT SAYING.

44
00:02:43,596 --> 00:02:44,531
- AND SNAKES.

45
00:02:44,597 --> 00:02:46,132
- YES, SNAKES, TOO.

46
00:02:46,199 --> 00:02:47,200
- AND DON'T FORGET WEREWOLVES.

47
00:02:47,267 --> 00:02:53,206
- THERE IS NO SUCH THING.
- [ALL TALKING AT ONCE]

48
00:02:53,273 --> 00:03:01,781
- OOH! YEAH!
FUN! YEAH! AHAAA!

49
00:03:02,382 --> 00:03:05,852
AAAAH!

50
00:03:05,919 --> 00:03:08,488
- [LAUGHTER]

51
00:03:15,562 --> 00:03:16,963
- [INDISTINCT]

52
00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:18,665
[SOBBING]

53
00:03:18,731 --> 00:03:20,633
- [RETCHING]

54
00:03:20,700 --> 00:03:23,269
- [LAUGHTER]

55
00:03:26,005 --> 00:03:28,608
- [CHATTERING]

56
00:04:39,345 --> 00:04:41,881
[SLURPING]

57
00:04:42,682 --> 00:04:45,151
- THAT'S RIGHT, FOLKS.
WE'VE GOT A WHOLE LOT OF

58
00:04:45,218 --> 00:04:47,120
2005 VEHICLES
THAT MUST BE SOLD,

59
00:04:47,186 --> 00:04:51,224
THANKS TO CRAZY DAVY'S
CHAPTER 11 DEBT RESTRUCTURING.

60
00:04:51,290 --> 00:04:52,525
[HORN HONKING]

61
00:04:52,592 --> 00:04:55,962
YUP, THERE GO MY WIFE AND KIDS.
I WON'T BE SEEING THEM AGAIN.

62
00:04:56,029 --> 00:04:58,031
CRAZY DAVY'S
CIRCLING THE BOWL, FOLKS.

63
00:04:58,097 --> 00:05:02,602
HELL, JUST BEND CRAZY DAVY
OVER THE HOOD OF THIS
FINE LUXURY SEDAN

64
00:05:02,669 --> 00:05:04,170
AND CORNHOLE HIM
TILL YOU'RE SATISFIED.

65
00:05:04,237 --> 00:05:08,574
AND AS A SPECIAL BONUS,
IF YOU FIND MY BRAINS
ON YOUR WINDSHIELD,

66
00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:10,877
YOU CAN HAVE MY DOG!

67
00:05:11,878 --> 00:05:13,746
WELL, BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME.

68
00:05:13,813 --> 00:05:17,884
- OK, SO THE ONLY THINGS
WE HAVE TO FEAR

69
00:05:17,950 --> 00:05:23,189
ARE SPIDERS, SNAKES, WEREWOLVES,
SHARKS, DYING ALONE,

70
00:05:23,256 --> 00:05:28,061
ZOMBIES, CLOWNS,
HEIGHTS, BIG DOGS,
ROBOTS WITH HUMAN BRAINS,

71
00:05:28,127 --> 00:05:31,731
JOHNSON'S WIFE, AND FEAR ITSELF.

72
00:05:31,798 --> 00:05:32,832
- [ALL TALKING AT ONCE]

73
00:05:32,899 --> 00:05:34,033
- MAN, MY LIFE SUCKS.

74
00:05:34,100 --> 00:05:37,770
I HATE WORKING AT
THE STUPID ARCHERY RANGE.

75
00:05:39,439 --> 00:05:41,641
OH, WHAT--WHERE AM I?

76
00:05:41,707 --> 00:05:43,810
- YOU'RE IN PURGATORY, DOUG.

77
00:05:43,876 --> 00:05:46,913
SPIN THE WHEEL OF REINCARNATION.

78
00:05:46,979 --> 00:05:50,650
- OH, BOY.
I HOPE I LAND ON
KEIRA KNIGHTLEY'S UNDERWEAR.

79
00:05:50,717 --> 00:05:54,153
- [SIGHS] EVERYONE WISHES
FOR THAT ONE.

80
00:05:58,257 --> 00:06:00,293
- HUGGYTIME BEAR?

81
00:06:02,495 --> 00:06:04,497
WHERE AM I?

82
00:06:04,564 --> 00:06:05,998
HOLY [BLEEP] ASS CRACKERS!

83
00:06:06,065 --> 00:06:09,168
- WELCOME! WE'RE
THE HUGGYTIME BEARS,

84
00:06:09,235 --> 00:06:12,839
AND WE SHALL CALL YOU
DOUG-A-LOT BEAR.

85
00:06:12,905 --> 00:06:14,474
- WHAT THE [BLEEP] IS
A HUGGYTIME BEAR?

86
00:06:14,540 --> 00:06:20,146
- WE SPREAD PEACE AND LOVE
WITH OUR SPECIAL POWERS.
- [LAUGHS]

87
00:06:20,213 --> 00:06:21,347
- AH...[BLEEP]

88
00:06:21,414 --> 00:06:23,282
- LET'S GO SPREAD JOY
TO CHILDREN!

89
00:06:23,349 --> 00:06:26,619
- OH, MAN, I WISH I LANDED ON
KEIRA KNIGHTLEY'S UNDERWEAR.

90
00:06:26,686 --> 00:06:29,522
- UH, PLEASE DON'T MENTION THAT
AROUND THE CHILDREN.

91
00:06:29,589 --> 00:06:30,289
- I FEEL SAD.

92
00:06:30,356 --> 00:06:32,358
- YEAH, BUT AT LEAST
WE'RE NOT GAY.

93
00:06:32,425 --> 00:06:34,193
- MAYBE WE CAN HELP!

94
00:06:34,260 --> 00:06:35,361
- THE HUGGYTIME BEARS!

95
00:06:35,428 --> 00:06:39,465
- GET READY FOR SOME
FUN AND LOVE, EVERY--AAH!

96
00:06:39,532 --> 00:06:42,301
[SCREAMING INDISTINCTLY]

97
00:06:44,337 --> 00:06:46,439
- WHAT? HIS NAME WAS
SHAMROCK BEAR.

98
00:06:46,506 --> 00:06:49,776
HE WAS OBVIOUSLY IRISH
AND, THEREFORE, DRUNK.

99
00:06:49,842 --> 00:06:51,477
AM I RIGHT OR AM I RIGHT?

100
00:06:51,544 --> 00:06:52,979
- THIS IS UNFORGIVABLE.

101
00:06:53,045 --> 00:06:55,148
- BRING OUT THE GIMP!

102
00:06:56,015 --> 00:06:59,786
- NO, DOOON'T!

103
00:06:59,852 --> 00:07:02,288
NO!
- OH, MY GOSH, I'VE SHOT YOU.

104
00:07:02,355 --> 00:07:03,322
- KEIRA KNIGHTLEY?

105
00:07:03,389 --> 00:07:04,991
- SHH. DON'T WORRY
ABOUT A THING.

106
00:07:05,057 --> 00:07:07,026
THE PARAMEDICS
WILL BE HERE SOON.

107
00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:07,860
- HA HA.

108
00:07:07,927 --> 00:07:10,263
I WAS ALMOST YOUR UNDERWEAR,
YOU KNOW.

109
00:07:12,565 --> 00:07:14,367
- HA HA, JERKASS.

110
00:07:14,433 --> 00:07:16,536
- I GOT YOU, TIMMY.

111
00:07:16,602 --> 00:07:19,772
- I--I CAN'T FEEL
MY ARMS AND LEGS.

112
00:07:20,740 --> 00:07:21,641
- PREVIOUSLY ON "BIG BROTHER,"

113
00:07:21,707 --> 00:07:25,211
A PRACTICAL JOKE WAR
RESULTED IN HURT FEELINGS.

114
00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:26,345
- OH!

115
00:07:26,412 --> 00:07:28,147
- GHOSTFACE'S LAUNDRY DEBACLE

116
00:07:28,214 --> 00:07:29,849
EARNED HIM THE WRATH OF FREDDY.

117
00:07:29,916 --> 00:07:31,818
- AW, WHERE THE HELL'S
MY SWEATER?

118
00:07:31,884 --> 00:07:33,553
- CHILL OUT.
IT'S IN THE DRYER.

119
00:07:33,619 --> 00:07:37,824
- YOU FOOL!
THE LABEL CLEARLY SAYS
PERMANENT PRESS.

120
00:07:37,890 --> 00:07:39,258
- [LAUGHS]

121
00:07:39,325 --> 00:07:42,562
- IT SAYS, WHOEVER REACHES
THE KITTEN FIRST

122
00:07:42,628 --> 00:07:46,666
WILL WIN THE GOLDEN POWER
OF VITO.

123
00:07:46,732 --> 00:07:49,435
[CHAINSAW WHIRRING]

124
00:07:51,637 --> 00:07:52,505
- COMPETITION WAS FIERCE,

125
00:07:52,572 --> 00:07:55,007
BUT IT WAS LEATHERFACE
WHO STOOD VICTORIOUS.

126
00:07:55,074 --> 00:07:57,743
AS A RESULT, IT WAS
MICHAEL AND GHOSTFACE

127
00:07:57,810 --> 00:08:00,513
WHO FOUND THEMSELVES
ON THE BLOCK.

128
00:08:00,580 --> 00:08:01,480
- OHH!

129
00:08:01,547 --> 00:08:04,584
- WHO WILL BE EVICTED?
FIND OUT LIVE, TONIGHT.

130
00:08:04,650 --> 00:08:07,854
- IF GHOSTFACE GOT VOTED OUT,
TAKE IT FROM FREDDY:

131
00:08:07,920 --> 00:08:10,389
THAT WOULD BE A DREAM COME TRUE.

132
00:08:10,456 --> 00:08:12,258
[LAUGHS]
YOU GET IT?

133
00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:13,526
[LAUGHS]
A DREAM?

134
00:08:13,593 --> 00:08:16,395
[LAUGHS] I KILL PEOPLE
IN THEIR NIGHTMARES, MAN.

135
00:08:16,462 --> 00:08:17,396
THAT'S WHAT I DO.
IT'S MY THING.

136
00:08:17,463 --> 00:08:19,232
- LAST WEEK,
AMERICA VOTED ONLINE

137
00:08:19,298 --> 00:08:22,235
TO DECIDE WHICH HOUSEGUEST
WOULD GET TO CALL HOME

138
00:08:22,301 --> 00:08:23,603
ON A T-MOBILE CELL PHONE.

139
00:08:23,669 --> 00:08:25,738
TONIGHT, WE HAVE
THE RESULTS.

140
00:08:25,805 --> 00:08:28,975
AND THE WINNER IS...GHOSTFACE!

141
00:08:29,041 --> 00:08:30,743
- AMERICA MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE,

142
00:08:30,810 --> 00:08:32,812
GIVING THE CALL TO GHOSTFACE.

143
00:08:32,879 --> 00:08:35,681
OF COURSE, I WOULD'VE
CALLED MY MUM.

144
00:08:35,748 --> 00:08:39,217
TODAY'S HER BIRTHDAY.
I LOVE YOU, MUM.

145
00:08:39,284 --> 00:08:40,519
[TELEPHONE RINGING]
- HELLO?

146
00:08:40,586 --> 00:08:42,188
- I SEE YOU MAKING POPCORN.

147
00:08:42,255 --> 00:08:45,591
- [GASPS] WHO IS THIS?
- I SAW THE "CHARLIE'S
ANGELS" SEQUEL.

148
00:08:45,658 --> 00:08:48,928
THAT WAS A PIECE OF CRAP! HA HA!
- I'M HANGING UP!

149
00:08:48,995 --> 00:08:51,163
- FIGHTING BOREDOM
IS THE HARDEST PART

150
00:08:51,230 --> 00:08:53,933
OF LIVING IN
THE "BIG BROTHER" HOUSE.

151
00:09:05,778 --> 00:09:06,879
- IN CASE YOU WERE WONDERING,

152
00:09:06,946 --> 00:09:09,181
THE ANSWER WAS
"THE DA VINCI CODE."

153
00:09:09,248 --> 00:09:12,451
- IT'S TIME TO DECIDE
WHICH HOUSEGUEST GETS EVICTED.

154
00:09:12,518 --> 00:09:15,788
MICHAEL, GHOSTFACE, YOU MAY NOW
PLEAD YOUR CASE.

155
00:09:15,855 --> 00:09:17,657
- YOU KNOW, I'M JUST TRYING
TO KEEP IT REAL,

156
00:09:17,723 --> 00:09:22,194
AND I WILL TREASURE
THE FRIENDSHIPS I HAVE MADE
IN THIS HOUSE

157
00:09:22,261 --> 00:09:23,396
MY WHOLE LIFE.

158
00:09:23,462 --> 00:09:28,167
BUT IF IT'S MY TIME TO GO, HEY,
NO HARD FEELINGS. I--

159
00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:30,102
- YOUR TURN, MICHAEL.

160
00:09:32,605 --> 00:09:34,840
- STOP THAT.
STOP IT!

161
00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:36,108
- THE VOTES HAVE BEEN CAST,

162
00:09:36,175 --> 00:09:41,647
AND THE NEXT HOUSEGUEST EVICTED
FROM "BIG BROTHER" IS...MICHAEL.

163
00:09:52,925 --> 00:09:56,696
MICHAEL MYERS.
THEY JUST KICKED YOU
OUT OF THE HOUSE.

164
00:09:56,762 --> 00:09:58,564
HOW DO YOU FEEL?

165
00:09:58,631 --> 00:10:02,134
- I FEEL RANDY, BABY, YEAH!

166
00:10:02,201 --> 00:10:05,871
WAYNE'S WORLD!
PARTY TIME! EXCELLENT!
- OH! OW! OW!

167
00:10:05,938 --> 00:10:08,541
STOP STABBING ME! OW!

168
00:10:09,041 --> 00:10:10,076
[CLUCKING]

169
00:10:10,142 --> 00:10:12,645
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP

170
00:10:12,712 --> 00:10:17,283
CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL
CAPTIONING INSTITUTE
--www.ncicap.org--

171
00:10:22,421 --> 00:10:26,125
- BOCK.
[ENGINE RUNNING]

172
00:10:26,192 --> 00:10:29,962
[MONKEY CHATTERING]