[panting]
Okay, so you take 35, multiply by 1.8 and add 30?
Thirty-two.
Can you please change your phone back to Fahrenheit?
I want to learn.
Oh, my God, it's 95 out there.
[sighs] It feels like 195 in here.
Uh, so you're going to add more heat? Why don't you open the oven and cook us?
Relax, it's on the cool setting.
Ah.
[Mindy laughs]
I will never take air conditioning for granted again.
I've got to buy a fan.
The least we can do is push this stank from one side of the room to the other.
[groans in disgust]
I'm going to go to the office early because maybe it'll be cooler in there.
Blow for the road?
[kissing]
Ooh, new menu already?
It's a new menu every day.
Every day? That is so much work.
It has to reflect the quality of what's in season.
We're not a diner, Emily.
I know.
Ooh, we should post this to Chez Lavaux's Instagram account each day.
Fresh produce, fresh content.
Ah. I've taught you so much.
[camera shutter clicks]
Wait. Where are those delicious grilled ramps?
Wilted.
But I just posted about that plate this morning!
#rampedupforweek2.
What can I say, Emily?
You don't expect me to serve something past its expiration date, do you?
Of course not. That would be so last-season of you.
Have a good day.
[sighs]
[panting]
It's like a sauna in here.
Can we turn up the air conditioning or… on?
We don't have air conditioning.
We don't?
It's not common in Paris.
It's so unnatural, artificial…
[inhales sharply] American.
-It's better than sweating at your desk. -No, it's bad for you.
It makes you catch colds. We're meant to feel the seasons change.
Can't you accept nature, Emily?
Must you control everything?
Mosquito.
[in French] Now I'm at six months,
I'm meant to sleep on my side, but I can't sleep at all.
[in English] But at least being awake means I get to talk to you.
[in French] Lucky me.
[in English] But we can speak English if it's easier.
[Madeline] Oh, no.
[in French] I like practicing with you.
I studied the French for years.
It has always been my dream to work in Paris.
[in English] If it wasn't for this damn baby, I'd be there. [laughs]
Is that Mad Mad Madeline?
[Madeline] Oh my God, Emily Cooper in the house!
-Show me that girl! -[Emily] Ah!
Bonjour, Windy City.
Well, unless there is anything else…
Oh, no, no, no. I've got the really, really big news.
We are promoting Pelotech's international roll-out.
-And guess what their next stop is? -[gasps]
-France? -[Madeline in French] That's right!
[in English] And they're très thrilled to hear about our French office.
I love saying that.
Oh, my God! I cannot believe that we're launching Pelotech in Paris!
Tell me everything.
[Madeline] So I'll start at the beginning because it's so juicy…
[Emily sighs]
[cell phone vibrating]
[laughs]
Le Chef Hot?
Excuse me?
That's your chef smile.
No it's not.
Next to no tips today.
At least we scored free falafel from that food truck.
No, it wasn't us.
Extreme weather always means smaller crowds.
I sang "All By Myself" to literally myself.
That's not true. I was listening.
[playing guitar]
What is that song?
Something I'm working on. It's nothing.
That's beautiful.
-I didn't know you composed music. -Yeah, I do.
Or used to. [chuckles]
I even went to music school, but I didn't finish.
My favorite teacher told me to stop trying to write songs.
[tuts]
It kind of crushed my confidence.
So I dropped out.
Then, all of a sudden, just recently, I started writing again.
What happened?
[chuckles]
You happened.
Yeah, since you joined the band,
I've been feeling very inspired.
Oh…
-Should I not have? -No.
I mean, yes. No, I wanted you to kiss me.
But I have falafel breath.
[laughs]
I don't care. I do too. We cancel each other out.
Okay, great.
[giggles]
[Alfie] Hold up!
[exhales] There you go.
Ooh! Coffee, good idea.
-It's a traveler, Cooper. -Mmm-hmm!
-Oh, that's beer! -[both laugh]
-What did you call it? -A traveler.
To drink whilst you're traveling to the next bar.
Or French class.
You know, one thing I'll give ol' Paris,
open container laws mean you can get on the lash whenever you want.
I don't think that's true.
Well, I haven't been nicked yet.
Maybe tonight's the night.
Fancy getting banged up abroad, Cooper?
You know, the more you drink, the more British you sound. [laughs]
Are you sure
-we're not too drunk for French class? -Mmm.
Should we skip it?
Can't. Need to get my little attendance slip signed for work.
Don't worry, love. We'll be hunky-dory.
Hunky-dory?
Oh, now you're just taking the piss.
-[laughs] -Mmm-hmm.
I'm a fast learner.
[laughs]
-[blows raspberry] -[both laughing]
I hope you both find your grades as funny.
Alfie, can you join me at the board, please.
So, one common mistake in the test
was people using "je suppose" instead of "j'imagine."
They're very similar, but "j'imagine" is more abstract.
Alfie, can you write on the board, please, "J'imagine que je suis en vacances."
[students snickering]
[hesitating] What was the rest?
[in French] No, not Jean Magine.
J'imagine.
-[in English] That's what I wrote. -No.
Who the hell's Jean Magine, anyway?
[in French] In French, please.
Qui est Jean Magine?
[students laughing]
[in French] I imagine Alfie's doing his best.
He doesn't have much opportunity to speak with many French people.
[in English] Now that was bloody brilliant!
[laughs]
What did she say?
-[Alfie exhales] -[Emily blows raspberry]
[Alfie groans]
[Jacqueline] Emily.
Well done. Tonight for the first time,
you fully immersed yourself in the language.
You didn't overthink it.
Merci. I don't know, really, what came over me,
but maybe it's the heatwave.
Yeah, or whatever's in that cup.
Alfie, I wish I could say the same to you.
All good. Not bothered.
I didn't think so. Hmm.
Bonne nuit.
[sighs] She is so into me.
[laughing]
[blowing]
[chuckles] Yeah. That fan did absolutely nothing.
I can't wait to get home.
Get out of this suit and just stand in front of my AC.
Ugh, I wish I had AC. My building is so ancient.
[laughs]
Well, you could come back to mine.
If you'd like.
I mean, if you need to cool down.
Fine.
But just like, you know, for the air conditioning.
Mmm!
Where do you live?
Mmm.
I didn't know people actually lived in La Défense.
I thought it was just business offices, board rooms and…
Banks.
I work in that one right there.
So my company put me up here, nearby.
No wonder you don't like Paris.
You're not in it. This is Pittsburgh!
[laughing] Pittsburgh.
Hmm.
Who are these cuties?
They came with the frame.
-[mockingly] Ha-ha. -I'm not joking.
[laughs]
I mean, you could do with a little color in here.
Or life.
Yeah. About that.
I've been meaning to tell you something.
See, I'm not a banker.
I'm a spy.
I knew there was something strange about your job.
-I mean, is Alfie even your real name? -Mmm-mmm.
Hmm.
Can I trust you?
I'm very discreet.
-And you promise not to laugh? -Promise.
It's…
-Judi Dench. -[laughs]
-Hey, you promised. -I'm sorry.
Okay, truly. I won't tell a soul.
-All right. -Judi.
[sighs]
Well, I wish I was a spy.
But I'm not.
I'm just a boring banker,
with a boring job, in a boring apartment.
Stuck in a city where no one can understand a word I say.
Then why did you come here?
Not my choice.
I mean, someone from the London office had to.
Everyone else is partnered up, married, kids.
But marketing…
now that's a cool job.
It can be.
But it's not all parties on love boats.
Oh, sure.
What were you doing last week
when you were too busy to have a drink with me?
Uh…
We were busy promoting the opening of a restaurant near my apartment.
-Which one? -Chez Lavaux.
See?
A restaurant opening.
That's cool.
I mean, your life in Paris is far more interesting than mine.
I still can't tell if you're joking or not.
See, I don't joke about everything.
I get serious about things I like.
Oh, really?
[Alfie] Mmm.
Like what?
Like…
you.
In the back.
No, no.
Okay.
-Just rip it. -What? Okay.
[sighs]
[groans]
Are you pulling a Houdini?
If that means sneaking out, yes.
But, I need to borrow a getaway shirt.
Take whatever.
Last night was fun, Cooper.
[chuckles]
It was.
You're not leaving without a kiss goodbye?
[laughs]
Goodbye.
Mmm-mmm.
See you soon.
Wow.
You do know some French.
Emily.
Good morning.
Or is it still night for you?
Uh, where are you off to, early bird?
Marché Bastille, you have to be there at 7:00
-for the best produce. -Hmm.
Where are you coming from, wearing a man's jacket?
Huh?
This, no! This is mine.
The oversized power suit look is very in right now.
Oh.
Enjoy the market!
[Pete] That's what we really like to go for here at Pelotech.
From what our research tells us,
exercise is more like a pastime in France.
Not a lifestyle.
We at Pelotech intend to shift that mentality.
One pedal stroke at a time. And we'll do it with this.
A heart-pumping cardio experience
that connects riders to a world-wide fitness community.
You can ride at the same time as your friends.
Post your stats to social, share high fives,
even video chat while you get your sweat on.
[in French] I'd prefer to ride a bike into the Seine.
Why would anyone want this when you can ride outside?
Huh? You don't go anywhere.
[Pete in English] Sorry, but I don't understand a word of French.
Wish my Spanish worked over here.
Can you please repeat what you said. All I caught was "La Seine."
Huh? Excusez-moi, I no speak English.
Lucky we have our Chicago transplant here. Emily, mind being my interpreter?
Yeah. Sure.
Sylvie said…
for Pelotech's launch,
we should stage bikes along the Seine for people to try.
[snaps fingers] Love that idea, Silvia.
[automated voice] Hey! Ready to ride Pelotech?
[in French] I guess we work for America now.
[Pete] The French market is so important to us.
Once the user logs in,
they can join a live ride taking place at our New York studio
or access our massive database of prerecorded classes.
They can track their progress…
So, did you get a fan for your apartment?
No, still hunting.
Every store I try is sold out. Oh, my God, thank you.
What shall we play first? I was thinking Sia's "Chandelier."
Oh, I love that song. Do you know it, Mindy?
Yeah. Do you know it, Mindy?
I feel like I've heard you sing it somewhere before.
No, no, I don't think so.
It could have been someone else. Maybe I should just zip it.
I'm sure I could stumble my way through it.
Great. I'll set up the mics.
Okay, what do you know?
Just that you are famous and, like, rich, rich.
Okay.
I didn't see you on Chinese Pop Star,
but when I sent a picture of our band to my cousin in Shanghai,
she died.
[laughing] Okay, great, yeah. Okay.
Étienne, can we please maybe just keep this between us?
I'm trying to reinvent myself here in Paris.
Why don't you want to tell Benoît?
Well, we're new and history has proven that when people find out I'm…
The zipper princess of China?
Right. That.
Sometimes things get weird.
[line ringing]
[Alfie] Hey, it's Alfie. Who leaves voicemails anymore? Beep.
-Hey, Alfie. I-- -Gotcha!
That was just me beeping.
Here's the real one.
You got me! That is so you!
Um, hey, it's… It's me, Emily. Emily Cooper from French class.
Yeah. You knew all that already.
Anyway. Um, wow, that beep trick really threw me.
-Um, I was calling about your jacket and-- -[line beeps]
[automated voice] If you're satisfied with your message, press 1.
To re-record, press three.
Three. Definitely three.
Ooh. That sounded desperate.
It was. I met someone and we--
Please spare me the details.
Happily.
The point is since then, he's stopped responding to my texts.
That's bad, right?
Well, if it's been more than 24 hours, then he's not into you.
Or, you should file a missing person's report.
[sighs]
The great outdoors.
See, Emily? This is how we ride in Paris.
[in French] Watch where you're going, lunatic!
You watch where you're going, asshole!
Shut up!
[groans] Oh, thank you.
[Emily sighs]
Ah!
Okay, well, it's official. Alfie is a jerk.
Are you sure he's ghosted you? I mean, it hasn't been that long.
Girl, I have texted him so many times.
How many?
Oh, girl.
[laughing] Oh, girl.
So many texts in a row.
You like him, huh?
Well, I thought I did. But now I definitely do not.
Ugh, I can't believe I have to see him again in French class.
Unless he ghosts you there too.
I mean, that's what ghosts do. They totally disappear on you.
-I feel so much better now. -Mmm.
You know, your pep talks could do with a little more pep.
Mmm.
[Madeline] Isn't Pete great?
He's so taut. Like a whippet.
Okay, so if you have a look at the budget and calendar I sent over,
I think you'll see that we can launch in the fall.
Pardon. Automne. [laughs]
I hope you don't mind me starting on these documents,
I wanted you to hit the ground running.
Or should I say, "riding"?
[laughs]
So what do you think of this idea:
[in French] Participate in the Tour de France,
from the comfort of your home.
I think that we should leave the creative to the people actually in Paris.
The French are susceptible to having their culture interpreted by foreigners
and shoved down their throats.
I totally agree.
Sylvie, this is why we're going to work so well together. We get each other.
Okay, let's schedule a weekly progress call.
[Sylvie] I'm looking at this calendar,
and I don't see how we can make Pelotech work.
If it's an issue of scheduling and resources, we can fix that.
This is an important luxury brand for us.
Just because it's expensive, it doesn't mean it's luxury.
You know?
I'm sorry, but it's just not a fit for my office.
Your office?
Let's table this for now.
And in the meantime,
I will send you the Gilbert Group's hierarchy of objectives.
Please don't.
[sighs]
Uh, where's the bike gone?
Did it just wheel itself out of here?
-[grunts] -Sylvie told us to get rid of it.
-Luc! -What's going on?
[cell phone vibrates]
Oh.
Come on.
Okay. Okay!
[Alfie] That's rubbish, mate! It's offside.
You Brits always call offside.
-Cooper. -Em.
Bonjour.
Hi.
Thanks for texting me.
Of course.
[in French] Chef. Can I talk to you?
[in English] Excuse me.
[Alfie] Hi.
You don't text me back, answer my calls, and then you just show up here!
[chuckles] What?
I lost my phone. I had no way of contacting you.
I couldn't remember where you worked,
but I remembered you did an event at this place.
Get in there!
-That's one apiece, guv. -No.
[laughs] Woo-hoo!
-There's plenty of time to go. -[laughs]
So can I have it back?
-Have what back? -My phone.
I'm pretty sure it's in that suit jacket of mine you stole.
Oh.
That jacket.
Right. Uh, you just stay here and watch the game, and I'll go get it.
Cheers.
[Alfie] Come on, boys. Come on.
Oh, you got a fan.
I have many fans. This one was a gift.
Hmm. He is so into you.
And he's kind of broke,
so he probably dumpster-dived for it, which makes me like him even more.
It turns out Alfie is not a ghost after all.
He didn't answer his phone because I had it.
It was in his jacket that I borrowed.
So really, you're the ghost.
Yeah.
I've got to run because he's at Gabriel's restaurant.
-Where they are watching soccer, together. -Oh, crap!
-How did that happen? -I'll explain later.
Hey!
I'm sorry about all this.
So when you said we couldn't be together,
it wasn't because you had an expiration date.
You were seeing someone.
He is the reason.
Yeah, I guess. He's the reason.
Well, it's good to know the truth.
Even if it's hard to watch.
What does that mean?
I want you to be happy, Emily. I just don't want to have to see it.
Sitting on the sidelines, watching you fall for someone.
I didn't intend for you to see anything.
This was an accident.
Yeah, but you like him.
I can tell.
[Alfie] Whoa, hey!
Hey, France lost!
-[Emily] Huh? -[Alfie laughs]
-Oh! -Oh, um…
-The game. -Yeah.
-Here. -[Alfie] Oh. Cheers, love.
So, uh, you fancy grabbing a bevvy?
If that's a drink, then, please.
Thanks for tracking her down.
No problem. She's all yours, mate.
[Alfie] Catch you later, yeah?
He's all right. I mean, for a frog.
[laughs]
Oh, my God.
Oh, shit.
My phone's not here.
Okay, so,
before I give this back to you, I have to delete some messages I sent you.
-All right, how many? -Too many.
[laughs]
Oh, Cooper. Do you like me?
[automated voice in French] Hello. Ready to ride with Pelotech?
[closing theme music playing]