1 00:00:12,554 --> 00:00:15,181 So, I needed a new lawyer, and Susie was going on 2 00:00:15,181 --> 00:00:16,766 and on about what a great lawyer you are. 3 00:00:16,766 --> 00:00:18,143 And then, the coup de grâce, 4 00:00:18,143 --> 00:00:19,477 - she told me your last name. - Oh. 5 00:00:19,477 --> 00:00:21,146 - Mantle. Christopher Mantle. - Yeah. 6 00:00:21,146 --> 00:00:22,981 - Yeah. Yes. - Oh, my God. 7 00:00:22,981 --> 00:00:25,400 I mean, Mickey Mantle, he was my idol growing up. 8 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:27,360 I don't follow baseball, but I know who Mickey Mantle is. 9 00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:29,112 Oh, my God, it's an amazing name. 10 00:00:29,112 --> 00:00:30,989 Well, Susie's great at connecting everybody. 11 00:00:30,989 --> 00:00:32,574 I love her. Oh, by the way, uh, 12 00:00:32,574 --> 00:00:34,451 she mentioned you might be going to the temple 13 00:00:34,451 --> 00:00:35,785 for the reopening of the plaza thing. 14 00:00:35,785 --> 00:00:38,163 Yeah, yeah. I'm being dragged there by this woman 15 00:00:38,163 --> 00:00:39,998 who I'm connected to somehow. 16 00:00:39,998 --> 00:00:41,499 Yeah, I'm being dragged there too. 17 00:00:41,499 --> 00:00:44,044 - Oh, you-- Really? - Yeah, my husband is Jewish. 18 00:00:44,044 --> 00:00:45,462 Oh, okay. We're both being dragged. 19 00:00:45,462 --> 00:00:47,339 - We're both being dragged. Yeah. - Look at that. 20 00:00:47,339 --> 00:00:49,507 Yeah. Yeah. So, uh, I familiarized myself 21 00:00:49,507 --> 00:00:51,676 with the case, like the rest of America, 22 00:00:51,676 --> 00:00:52,802 and listen to me, Larry. 23 00:00:52,802 --> 00:00:54,804 This is the most unconstitutional law 24 00:00:54,804 --> 00:00:56,848 that's ever been passed. The law should be on trial, 25 00:00:56,848 --> 00:00:58,058 - not you. - Really? 26 00:00:58,058 --> 00:01:00,018 So, I'm confident this 27 00:01:00,018 --> 00:01:01,686 - will get cleared up quickly. - Wow. 28 00:01:01,686 --> 00:01:03,355 And I'll file something by the end of the week, 29 00:01:03,355 --> 00:01:05,690 which is the cutoff date, to file a motion to dismiss. 30 00:01:05,690 --> 00:01:07,901 So, all will be taken care of. Yeah. You can rest easy. 31 00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:09,736 Oh, my God, that is music to my ears. 32 00:01:09,736 --> 00:01:12,113 Yes. We're gonna avoid a trial, and it's gonna be... 33 00:01:12,113 --> 00:01:13,490 ...tossed out. 34 00:01:13,490 --> 00:01:14,949 - Mr. Mantle. - Yeah. 35 00:01:14,949 --> 00:01:16,368 All-- You-- You just hit a home run. 36 00:01:16,368 --> 00:01:17,494 - You know? - Yeah. 37 00:01:17,494 --> 00:01:19,204 - That's fantastic. - Thanks. Yeah. 38 00:01:19,204 --> 00:01:21,373 So, the good news is, I can still parade around 39 00:01:21,373 --> 00:01:25,877 like I'm a hero of sorts without having to go to trial... 40 00:01:25,877 --> 00:01:27,295 - Yeah. - ...or prison, or anything. 41 00:01:27,295 --> 00:01:28,963 That's right. You will not have to go to trial. 42 00:01:28,963 --> 00:01:30,382 You will not be going to prison. 43 00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:31,883 Mr. Mantle, Denise on line one. 44 00:01:31,883 --> 00:01:33,968 One second. Sorry. 45 00:01:33,968 --> 00:01:36,721 Hello? Yeah. 46 00:01:36,721 --> 00:01:40,183 Oh, really? Oh, that's great. Can you put that back, Larr? 47 00:01:40,183 --> 00:01:41,559 Can you put that back down? 48 00:01:41,559 --> 00:01:43,853 Yeah, it's great. Thank you so much, Denise. 49 00:01:43,853 --> 00:01:44,729 Okay, bye. 50 00:01:44,729 --> 00:01:46,481 Sorry about that. That was my surrogate. 51 00:01:46,481 --> 00:01:48,692 My husband and I are having a baby. 52 00:01:48,692 --> 00:01:50,026 - Ah, no kidding. - Yeah. 53 00:01:50,026 --> 00:01:52,153 - Congratulations. Big news. That's great. - Thank you. Yeah, yeah. 54 00:01:52,153 --> 00:01:53,613 - We're really excited. - You like the surrogate? 55 00:01:53,613 --> 00:01:55,990 - I do. She's really sweet. - She took an IQ test? 56 00:01:55,990 --> 00:01:57,158 - I... - I mean, you don't wanna get 57 00:01:57,158 --> 00:01:58,743 - a moron, right? - Correct. 58 00:01:58,743 --> 00:02:00,036 You're sure she's not a moron? 59 00:02:00,036 --> 00:02:01,830 Yes. Thank you for your concern. Yeah. 60 00:02:01,830 --> 00:02:03,623 Let me ask you a question. How does it work with a-- 61 00:02:03,623 --> 00:02:05,917 with a gay couple? Who gets to choose the last name? 62 00:02:05,917 --> 00:02:09,629 We, uh, had a discussion, and we chose my husband's name. 63 00:02:09,629 --> 00:02:10,880 Oh. Which is? 64 00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:12,173 Zeckelman. 65 00:02:13,925 --> 00:02:14,926 Yeah. 66 00:02:14,926 --> 00:02:18,555 You're going with Zeckelman over Mantle? 67 00:02:18,555 --> 00:02:20,557 Is something wrong with his last name? 68 00:02:20,557 --> 00:02:23,018 It's not the greatest last name in the world, 69 00:02:23,018 --> 00:02:25,812 but Mantle is one of the great names. 70 00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:27,188 Well, thank you. I-- 71 00:02:27,188 --> 00:02:30,567 I personally think Zeckelman is also a great name. 72 00:02:32,569 --> 00:02:33,445 Is that okay? 73 00:02:33,445 --> 00:02:36,156 It's okay. It's not so great for the kid. 74 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:37,574 Why is it not great for the kid? 75 00:02:37,574 --> 00:02:41,619 I don't know any Zeckelmans who hit 536 home runs. 76 00:02:41,870 --> 00:02:43,413 Yet. 77 00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:44,998 - Okay. All right. - Okay. 78 00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:46,166 - Nice to meet you, Larry. - Okay. 79 00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:47,625 - Nice to meet you. - Yeah, you too. 80 00:02:47,625 --> 00:02:49,294 - I'll see you at temple. - Are you going with Zeckelman? 81 00:02:49,294 --> 00:02:51,296 I'm going with... 82 00:02:51,296 --> 00:02:53,423 - Zeckelman, yeah. - Great. See you there. 83 00:02:53,423 --> 00:02:55,675 Okay. 84 00:02:55,675 --> 00:02:57,052 Let me tell you. 85 00:02:57,052 --> 00:02:58,386 I met the greatest girl. 86 00:02:58,386 --> 00:03:00,430 Her name is Jenna, and she's pretty incredible. 87 00:03:00,430 --> 00:03:02,015 It's been going on for a couple weeks. 88 00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:03,475 - Really? - Yeah. She's really funny. 89 00:03:03,475 --> 00:03:05,352 She's smart. She knows music. 90 00:03:05,352 --> 00:03:07,687 She challenges me. Great conversationalist. 91 00:03:07,687 --> 00:03:09,564 - What does she do? - She works for Disney. 92 00:03:09,564 --> 00:03:11,316 - I think she's an executive. - Wow. 93 00:03:11,316 --> 00:03:13,068 She's always just talking about the film. 94 00:03:13,068 --> 00:03:14,486 She knows all the things that are coming out. 95 00:03:14,486 --> 00:03:17,238 I mean, she was talking about, like, the princess costumes 96 00:03:17,238 --> 00:03:18,448 and where they're going and evolving. 97 00:03:18,448 --> 00:03:20,909 Just to be involved in steering the television 98 00:03:20,909 --> 00:03:22,035 and the films is a lot, 99 00:03:22,035 --> 00:03:23,244 but she's gotta keep it in her mind, like, 100 00:03:23,244 --> 00:03:24,496 "How do I turn that into a ride?" 101 00:03:24,496 --> 00:03:26,539 - That's pretty impressive, yeah. - Super impressive. 102 00:03:26,539 --> 00:03:28,166 Honestly, I've never heard you talk like this. 103 00:03:28,166 --> 00:03:29,668 Well, I've never felt this way before. 104 00:03:29,668 --> 00:03:30,669 - Wow. - Sports. 105 00:03:30,669 --> 00:03:32,128 - She into sports? - You know, it's too soon. 106 00:03:32,128 --> 00:03:33,213 I haven't gotten into sports yet. 107 00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:35,173 If you get sports here... 108 00:03:35,173 --> 00:03:36,341 - Oh. - ...it's too much. 109 00:03:36,341 --> 00:03:37,759 If I get sports, you're my best man. 110 00:03:37,759 --> 00:03:40,053 Damn. If she working at Disney, next time you talk to her, 111 00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:42,013 ask her about that fine-ass Tinkerbell. 112 00:03:42,013 --> 00:03:43,098 You're attracted to Tinkerbell? 113 00:03:43,098 --> 00:03:44,641 Tinkerbell flies her little ass in there. 114 00:03:44,641 --> 00:03:47,018 She put her little booty out, with that little booty tooch. 115 00:03:47,018 --> 00:03:48,728 - Mm. That little booty go out... - Yeah. 116 00:03:48,728 --> 00:03:49,604 ...and bling! 117 00:03:49,604 --> 00:03:52,482 It speaks of a very unusual perversion. 118 00:03:52,482 --> 00:03:55,568 A man attracted to a thimble-sized fairy. 119 00:03:55,568 --> 00:03:57,070 Tinkerbell fine as fuck. Come on. 120 00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,446 I'll put her in my motherfucking pocket. 121 00:03:58,446 --> 00:04:00,573 You hear me? And I'll just walk around knowing she home. 122 00:04:00,573 --> 00:04:01,783 And she flies her little ass out there, 123 00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:03,284 give me a little kiss on the cheek and shit, 124 00:04:03,284 --> 00:04:06,538 and flies the fuck off. 125 00:04:06,538 --> 00:04:08,540 Hey. That's a nice-ass jacket you got, too. 126 00:04:08,540 --> 00:04:10,625 - Oh. Yeah. Thank you. - Looks good on you. 127 00:04:10,625 --> 00:04:12,002 - I really like it. - I love it. 128 00:04:12,002 --> 00:04:14,170 You wouldn't normally think suede would be nice. 129 00:04:14,170 --> 00:04:15,630 'Cause it's a darker green. Isn't it nice? 130 00:04:15,630 --> 00:04:16,881 Look at that fish. 131 00:04:16,881 --> 00:04:18,508 What's up with that fish? 132 00:04:19,050 --> 00:04:20,218 Looks like it's stuck. 133 00:04:20,218 --> 00:04:21,720 - Look at him struggle. - Yeah, yeah. 134 00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:23,388 His little nose is trapped in that filter. 135 00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:26,224 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, excuse me. 136 00:04:26,224 --> 00:04:27,475 Yes, sir? 137 00:04:27,475 --> 00:04:30,353 That fish, it looks like he's stuck. 138 00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:32,897 Oh, no, fish not stuck, fish sick. 139 00:04:32,897 --> 00:04:34,149 No, no, fish stuck. 140 00:04:34,149 --> 00:04:36,109 No, this time of year is tough for fish, 141 00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:37,402 so fish gets sick easily. 142 00:04:37,402 --> 00:04:39,612 The filter is very warm, so it make him feel better. 143 00:04:39,612 --> 00:04:41,948 - So, it's okay. It's normal. - Seriously? Look at that. 144 00:04:41,948 --> 00:04:43,033 That fish is stuck. 145 00:04:43,033 --> 00:04:45,410 No. See, fish wiggle, it mean fish sneeze. 146 00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:46,494 Fish don't sneeze. 147 00:04:46,494 --> 00:04:48,121 - The fish didn't sneeze. - No, fish sneeze. 148 00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:49,581 This guy's stuck. Fish sick now. 149 00:04:49,581 --> 00:04:50,749 - Fish stuck. - No, fish sick. 150 00:04:50,749 --> 00:04:52,792 Well, he's gonna get sick if he stays stuck. 151 00:04:52,792 --> 00:04:53,752 - Yeah. - No, it's okay. 152 00:04:53,752 --> 00:04:55,378 Can someone go in the tank and unstuck? 153 00:04:55,378 --> 00:04:57,505 Sir, it's not necessary. Fish sick. 154 00:04:57,505 --> 00:04:59,174 - Okay, you're out of your mind. - You know what? 155 00:04:59,174 --> 00:05:01,301 All this talk about fish, now I want fish. 156 00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:02,594 Give me the snapper off the menu. 157 00:05:02,594 --> 00:05:05,138 - Oh, fish delicious. Okay. - My man. 158 00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:06,348 That's a stuck fish. 159 00:05:06,348 --> 00:05:08,308 I can't even eat. I feel so bad for that fish. 160 00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:09,601 At least that motherfucker can't drown. 161 00:05:13,271 --> 00:05:15,315 Great meeting everybody. Keep coming back. 162 00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:16,900 It works if you work it. 163 00:05:22,489 --> 00:05:25,200 ...when I'm not in control of myself, you know? 164 00:05:26,368 --> 00:05:29,245 Hey, if it worked for you, then that's all I care about. 165 00:05:29,245 --> 00:05:30,914 It's a 12-step program. 166 00:05:32,082 --> 00:05:33,249 - Hey. - You know, 167 00:05:33,249 --> 00:05:34,751 you're not supposed to have these. 168 00:05:34,751 --> 00:05:36,378 - These are for everybody. - Oh. (CLEARS THROAT) Really? 169 00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:38,046 - They count it exactly. - What, are you kidding? 170 00:05:38,046 --> 00:05:39,839 - He just took a donut 'cause... - What? There's tons of 'em. 171 00:05:39,839 --> 00:05:42,133 - Hey, Larry. Thanks for coming. - Hey, Cyrus. Yeah, sure. Yeah. 172 00:05:42,133 --> 00:05:44,469 - Hey, good to see ya. - Tell ya what, you alcoholics, 173 00:05:44,469 --> 00:05:45,929 you know your way around a good donut. 174 00:05:45,929 --> 00:05:47,639 - I guess that's true. - So, what are you? 175 00:05:47,639 --> 00:05:49,641 - I never thought about that. - Are you addicted to these now? 176 00:05:49,641 --> 00:05:51,059 - Well, as you can tell. - Yeah. Yeah. 177 00:05:51,059 --> 00:05:53,395 You know, Richard Lewis is here. 178 00:05:53,395 --> 00:05:54,562 He spoke during the meeting. 179 00:05:54,562 --> 00:05:56,731 - Well, he took over the meeting. - Well-- 180 00:05:56,731 --> 00:05:59,067 - It was a-- It was a lot. - It was his turn to share. 181 00:05:59,067 --> 00:06:00,944 - 'Cause he shared and shared and shared. - Yeah. 182 00:06:00,944 --> 00:06:03,988 You know, a lot of people find it funny, but he works so blue. 183 00:06:03,988 --> 00:06:06,324 - I heard the word "hell" like... - Oh. 184 00:06:06,324 --> 00:06:07,617 - Oh, poor thing. - ...three times. 185 00:06:07,617 --> 00:06:10,537 Listen, um, I... 186 00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:12,622 - Come on! Get-- Just ask him. - Well-- I-- 187 00:06:12,622 --> 00:06:14,582 He know-- He gets this all the time, trust me. 188 00:06:14,582 --> 00:06:16,126 I feel stupid. I'm embarrassed. 189 00:06:16,126 --> 00:06:17,168 That's okay. Don't be embarrassed. 190 00:06:17,168 --> 00:06:18,837 No, no, be embarrassed. Don't ask. 191 00:06:20,338 --> 00:06:21,631 If you don't have to, don't. 192 00:06:21,631 --> 00:06:23,675 Well, listen. My daughter, she wants to be a writer, 193 00:06:23,675 --> 00:06:24,843 and, uh... 194 00:06:24,843 --> 00:06:27,137 ...I just wondered if you had anybody 195 00:06:27,137 --> 00:06:28,847 that maybe could read her stuff? 196 00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:34,310 Ah. Uh, I... Um, yeah. I-- 197 00:06:34,310 --> 00:06:36,062 - Let me think about it. - Really? 198 00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:38,023 - Thank you so-- - Hey, what the hell are you doing, man? 199 00:06:38,023 --> 00:06:39,566 - Hell away from me. - He hates being hugged. 200 00:06:39,566 --> 00:06:40,859 - There's no touching here. No touching. - Okay. 201 00:06:40,859 --> 00:06:42,777 Remember to keep it simple, babe. 202 00:06:42,777 --> 00:06:45,196 Really, I appreciate the compliment. 203 00:06:45,196 --> 00:06:47,157 You should've seen me today. 204 00:06:47,157 --> 00:06:48,950 - You had a good meeting? - I got laughs 205 00:06:48,950 --> 00:06:50,827 bigger than I've ever gotten before at a meeting. 206 00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:52,537 I thought you were supposed to share here. 207 00:06:52,537 --> 00:06:54,039 It sounds like you're doing stand-up. 208 00:06:54,039 --> 00:06:55,957 - It's not stand-up. - Well, you're talking like it's stand-up. 209 00:06:55,957 --> 00:06:58,460 Well, I mean, I can't divorce my comic self. 210 00:06:58,460 --> 00:07:00,503 Part of me will always be a comedian and... 211 00:07:00,503 --> 00:07:01,629 - Uh-huh. - ...and a drunk. 212 00:07:01,629 --> 00:07:03,715 I wish you would come and see me sometime. 213 00:07:03,715 --> 00:07:05,508 - You-- What? - Hey. Excuse me, Larry. 214 00:07:05,508 --> 00:07:07,218 You absolutely murdered it tonight. 215 00:07:07,218 --> 00:07:08,678 - Hey, man. - Big laughs. 216 00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:09,763 Come back next time. 217 00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:11,473 - Terrific. - I'll do new stuff. 218 00:07:11,473 --> 00:07:13,391 - They love me. - What is going on here? 219 00:07:13,391 --> 00:07:15,435 This doesn't sound like an AA meeting. It-- 220 00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:16,936 - No, it is an-- - It sounds like a concert. 221 00:07:16,936 --> 00:07:18,938 I'm doing a service, but I-- I want people 222 00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:20,023 to laugh and enjoy. 223 00:07:20,023 --> 00:07:21,149 Do you let anybody else talk? 224 00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:23,485 Well, there was a sad old lady who opened for me, 225 00:07:23,485 --> 00:07:24,736 but she only did ten minutes. 226 00:07:24,736 --> 00:07:26,571 The only problem is you're doing your act, 227 00:07:26,571 --> 00:07:27,906 but nobody's drinking. 228 00:07:27,906 --> 00:07:29,908 - Imagine if they were drinking. - If they were drinking... 229 00:07:29,908 --> 00:07:31,451 - Yeah. - ...the roof would be blown off. 230 00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:32,619 You know, forget about it. 231 00:07:32,619 --> 00:07:33,870 - Yes. - But I don't know how we can-- 232 00:07:33,870 --> 00:07:36,581 Excuse me. I'm sorry. That was just incredible. 233 00:07:36,581 --> 00:07:37,791 I had to thank you. 234 00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:39,459 - A lot of laughs? - A lot of laughs. 235 00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:41,211 - Oh, wow. - The bartender from hell part, 236 00:07:41,211 --> 00:07:42,253 I was crying. 237 00:07:42,253 --> 00:07:43,755 - Did that work? - Yeah, it totally worked. 238 00:07:43,755 --> 00:07:45,340 - Have a good night. Thank you. - Thanks for coming over. 239 00:07:45,340 --> 00:07:46,633 I'm here, like, twice a week. 240 00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:48,051 - Okay, good. Thanks. - Okay. 241 00:07:48,051 --> 00:07:49,552 The bartender from hell. 242 00:07:49,552 --> 00:07:51,429 Yeah. I mean, I do the "from hell" on occasion, 243 00:07:51,429 --> 00:07:53,556 but I'm workshopping a few other things. 244 00:07:53,556 --> 00:07:54,974 I'll tell ya, another couple of meetings like this, 245 00:07:54,974 --> 00:07:56,434 - I'll have a special. - You know what? 246 00:07:56,434 --> 00:07:57,602 That's a fantastic idea. 247 00:07:57,602 --> 00:07:58,978 - For a session. - The AA special. 248 00:07:58,978 --> 00:08:00,438 This is the hook I've been looking for. 249 00:08:00,438 --> 00:08:02,649 - This is it! - Why not talk about being sober 250 00:08:02,649 --> 00:08:04,359 but get a special with HBO? 251 00:08:04,359 --> 00:08:05,443 There you go. 252 00:08:05,443 --> 00:08:07,278 Thank you. That's why we're best friends. 253 00:08:07,278 --> 00:08:08,738 The Drunk From Hell concert. 254 00:08:08,738 --> 00:08:10,740 The outpouring of support from the community... 255 00:08:10,740 --> 00:08:12,784 This whole complex was all landfill. 256 00:08:12,784 --> 00:08:14,619 - This land. - Hors d'oeuvres? 257 00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:16,871 - Eh, no, I don't think so. - What is this? 258 00:08:16,871 --> 00:08:18,748 - Really? You're gonna eat that? - It's meat. 259 00:08:18,748 --> 00:08:20,375 I may go get something else, 260 00:08:20,375 --> 00:08:22,293 so I need to build a base with some rice. 261 00:08:22,293 --> 00:08:25,463 - Yeah, go build your rice base. - You gonna be okay on your own? 262 00:08:25,463 --> 00:08:27,090 - It'll be tough, but yeah. - I'll miss you. 263 00:08:27,090 --> 00:08:28,341 Stay right there. 264 00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:35,724 - Hey, hey, hey! - Hey! How are ya? 265 00:08:35,724 --> 00:08:37,642 Good to see ya. Larry, this is Jenna, 266 00:08:37,642 --> 00:08:40,645 - who I told you so much about. - So nice to finally meet you. 267 00:08:40,645 --> 00:08:44,232 Nice to meet you. He... He talked. He did some talking. 268 00:08:44,232 --> 00:08:45,483 - Did he? - A little bit. 269 00:08:45,483 --> 00:08:47,235 - Well, uh, yeah. - He did. I'm hearing talk 270 00:08:47,235 --> 00:08:49,529 - You talked me? - A lot of talk. 271 00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:51,156 You know what? It's kind of fortuitous 272 00:08:51,156 --> 00:08:53,533 - that I ran into you, because... - Oh? 273 00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:55,326 All right, here we go, okay? 274 00:08:55,326 --> 00:08:58,496 First of all, I hate asking for favors almost as much 275 00:08:58,496 --> 00:08:59,748 as I hate doing favors. 276 00:08:59,748 --> 00:09:02,542 And so, I have a friend, his daughter wrote a script, 277 00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:06,338 and the guy asked me if I knew anybody 278 00:09:06,338 --> 00:09:07,672 who could read the script, 279 00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:09,507 and Freddy told me all about you, 280 00:09:09,507 --> 00:09:11,301 and would you mind reading it? 281 00:09:11,301 --> 00:09:13,762 You want me to read the script? 282 00:09:13,762 --> 00:09:16,306 And listen. I'm sure you're really busy and-- 283 00:09:16,306 --> 00:09:18,016 No, no! I would love to read the script. 284 00:09:18,016 --> 00:09:19,809 - You're kidding? - No, I'd be excited. 285 00:09:19,809 --> 00:09:23,772 Maybe if you had any notes, you know, feel free, you know. 286 00:09:23,772 --> 00:09:25,023 Totally. Yes, yes. I-- 287 00:09:25,023 --> 00:09:26,441 I'm sure she would love that. 288 00:09:26,441 --> 00:09:28,193 No, I can give her notes. 289 00:09:28,193 --> 00:09:29,819 - Where did you find her? Huh? - Did I-- 290 00:09:29,819 --> 00:09:31,029 - Where's the planet? - Did I oversell? 291 00:09:31,029 --> 00:09:32,489 - Stop. - Point to the planet. 292 00:09:32,489 --> 00:09:33,782 There's no more. There's no more of 'em. 293 00:09:33,782 --> 00:09:35,158 Stop. I'm blushing. 294 00:09:35,158 --> 00:09:37,160 - Yeah, I'll get you guys set up. - We'll set it up. 295 00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:39,204 We gotta run along and meet a couple other people, but it was great to see you. 296 00:09:39,204 --> 00:09:41,289 - So nice to finally meet you. - Good to see ya. Nice to meet you. 297 00:09:42,624 --> 00:09:44,292 - This is the guy? - Yes, that's him. 298 00:09:44,292 --> 00:09:45,835 - Right here? - Yes. 299 00:09:45,835 --> 00:09:48,046 - But we don't have to, like, make a thing. - Just give me a second. 300 00:09:48,046 --> 00:09:49,673 Hey. Larry? 301 00:09:50,382 --> 00:09:51,633 - Abe Zeckelman. - Yeah. 302 00:09:51,633 --> 00:09:54,260 You have a problem with the name of our child? 303 00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:55,845 It's-- I... 304 00:09:55,845 --> 00:09:57,597 I wouldn't say it's a problem. 305 00:09:57,597 --> 00:09:59,599 - Well, what is it? - Well, I thought 306 00:09:59,599 --> 00:10:02,268 that given the choice of Mantle and Zeckelman, 307 00:10:02,268 --> 00:10:04,229 that Mantle was a better name. 308 00:10:04,229 --> 00:10:05,480 Based on what exactly? 309 00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:07,023 Let's be honest, it's not a great name. 310 00:10:07,023 --> 00:10:09,025 - What's wrong with it? - Zeckelman? Come on. 311 00:10:09,025 --> 00:10:11,027 You seem really worked up over my last name. 312 00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:12,696 If you think that's a great name, 313 00:10:12,696 --> 00:10:14,072 then what's a bad name? 314 00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:15,949 Well, I'd rather have a bad last name than no last name. 315 00:10:15,949 --> 00:10:17,659 My name's Larry. I don't think it's a great name. 316 00:10:17,659 --> 00:10:18,952 I'm honest about it. 317 00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:21,579 Would I rather be a Dash or a Dazzy or a Dan? You know. 318 00:10:21,579 --> 00:10:22,914 Well, the good thing about an opinion 319 00:10:22,914 --> 00:10:24,249 is that you can keep it to yourself. 320 00:10:24,249 --> 00:10:26,793 But then everybody would walk around not saying anything. 321 00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:28,044 You're not keeping this to yourself. 322 00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:29,170 No, I couldn't keep this to myself. 323 00:10:29,170 --> 00:10:31,006 Okay, well, I couldn't keep that to myself. 324 00:10:31,006 --> 00:10:33,466 It's a deeply inappropriate conversation to be having. 325 00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:34,718 You know, just think about the playground. 326 00:10:34,718 --> 00:10:36,636 He's in a unique situation. 327 00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:38,096 - What's that supposed to mean? - What? Yeah. 328 00:10:38,096 --> 00:10:40,807 Well, you know, the, uh... the two dads. 329 00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:43,059 Yeah, it's not that unique of a situation. 330 00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:45,353 Maybe it's not unique. Different. 331 00:10:45,353 --> 00:10:46,479 - Different? - Well, it's... 332 00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:47,939 - Slightly different? - Slightly different. 333 00:10:47,939 --> 00:10:49,607 - To us, it's normal. Yeah. - Yeah. 334 00:10:49,607 --> 00:10:51,109 - No, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. - Yeah. Yeah. 335 00:10:51,109 --> 00:10:52,527 Let me ask you this question. 336 00:10:52,527 --> 00:10:54,529 How did you decide on the last name anyway? 337 00:10:54,529 --> 00:10:55,989 I assume it's your semen, right? 338 00:10:56,656 --> 00:10:58,533 What did you just say? 339 00:10:58,533 --> 00:10:59,743 No, we're talking about semen now. 340 00:10:59,743 --> 00:11:01,119 - I assume it's your semen? - It's-- 341 00:11:01,119 --> 00:11:02,454 'Cause that's how you got Zeckelman? 342 00:11:02,454 --> 00:11:03,621 We're having this conversation? 343 00:11:03,621 --> 00:11:04,831 What? I mean, I'm just wondering 344 00:11:04,831 --> 00:11:07,125 - how you got there. - It's-- Yeah. It-- 345 00:11:07,125 --> 00:11:08,626 - It's my semen. - If you must know, 346 00:11:08,626 --> 00:11:10,295 - it's his semen. - It's your semen? 347 00:11:10,295 --> 00:11:13,381 - What's the problem with that? - I mean, you would think that... 348 00:11:13,381 --> 00:11:16,593 you know, the... the donor would... would get the name. 349 00:11:16,593 --> 00:11:18,845 Well, we had a conversation at home about it. 350 00:11:18,845 --> 00:11:20,263 Because it's a private thing. 351 00:11:20,263 --> 00:11:22,515 By the way, I don't know if you've chosen a first name, 352 00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:24,893 but if you need any help, I'm your guy. 353 00:11:24,893 --> 00:11:26,311 - Are ya? - 'Cause you got two first names. 354 00:11:26,311 --> 00:11:29,356 I'm-- How 'bout this? Off the top of my head, Ziggy. 355 00:11:29,356 --> 00:11:30,523 Ziggy Zeckelman. Hey. 356 00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:32,233 You think Ziggy Zeckelman is a great name? 357 00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:33,735 I do. Scooter Zeckelman? 358 00:11:33,735 --> 00:11:35,570 They're all good names. We'll put 'em both in the hat. 359 00:11:35,570 --> 00:11:36,821 We're not putting that in the hat. 360 00:11:36,821 --> 00:11:38,615 - How 'bout Foots? - Foot Zeckelman? 361 00:11:38,615 --> 00:11:39,991 - Foots. - Is our family 362 00:11:39,991 --> 00:11:41,493 - a joke to you, Larry? - No! 363 00:11:41,493 --> 00:11:43,244 Zeckelman needs a cool first name! 364 00:11:43,244 --> 00:11:45,288 I think I've had enough of this conversation. 365 00:11:45,288 --> 00:11:46,623 - Okay. - Uh. 366 00:11:46,623 --> 00:11:48,541 - Great to meet you, Larry. - Doc. Doc Zeckelman. 367 00:11:48,541 --> 00:11:49,918 Doc Zeckelman is a joke. 368 00:11:49,918 --> 00:11:51,503 - Ace. - I'm gonna go get some food. 369 00:11:51,503 --> 00:11:52,629 - Okay. - Ace Zeckelman? 370 00:11:52,629 --> 00:11:53,755 That's not a great name? 371 00:11:53,755 --> 00:11:55,340 We're gonna talk about it at home. 372 00:11:55,340 --> 00:11:57,717 Dewey, Duncan, Deegan. Deegan. 373 00:11:57,717 --> 00:11:59,427 After the Major Deegan Expressway. 374 00:11:59,427 --> 00:12:01,846 - We got plenty of options. - I'm giving you gold here. 375 00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:03,181 - Uh, the last-- - Chris. 376 00:12:03,181 --> 00:12:05,517 - One second. Um, thank you. - Forget it. 377 00:12:05,517 --> 00:12:07,310 - What? - Don't bother. 378 00:12:07,811 --> 00:12:09,521 I gotta go. 379 00:12:09,521 --> 00:12:11,690 Babe, come on. Come back. 380 00:12:28,456 --> 00:12:29,749 The fuck? 381 00:12:33,628 --> 00:12:35,088 Excuse me. Rabbi Adelman? 382 00:12:35,088 --> 00:12:36,715 - Can I talk to you for a second? - Excuse me. 383 00:12:36,715 --> 00:12:37,757 - Yeah. Sorry to interrupt. - Hey. 384 00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:39,050 I'm glad you're here today. 385 00:12:39,050 --> 00:12:41,011 - Who's in charge of the bricks? - I am. 386 00:12:41,011 --> 00:12:42,053 - You are? - Yes. 387 00:12:42,053 --> 00:12:43,304 You know there's a brick that says, 388 00:12:43,304 --> 00:12:45,056 "Larry David is disrespectful to women." 389 00:12:45,056 --> 00:12:46,599 You allowed that to be up there? 390 00:12:46,599 --> 00:12:48,268 We don't really edit the bricks. 391 00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:51,146 The donor gets to express what thoughts and feelings 392 00:12:51,146 --> 00:12:52,439 - they have. - Oh, so anybody can write 393 00:12:52,439 --> 00:12:54,566 - anything they want on a brick? - Well, we would not like 394 00:12:54,566 --> 00:12:56,276 - hate speech. - Well, what is that? 395 00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:57,152 That's hate speech. 396 00:12:57,152 --> 00:12:59,404 I think it's strong dislike speech. 397 00:12:59,404 --> 00:13:00,363 Okay, I want that taken down. 398 00:13:00,363 --> 00:13:02,741 We only add bricks. We don't take them away. 399 00:13:02,741 --> 00:13:04,075 Oh, you don't remove bricks? 400 00:13:04,075 --> 00:13:07,704 That brick is gonna be up there forever. 401 00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:09,164 - Posterity. - Let me ask you a question. 402 00:13:09,164 --> 00:13:11,332 There's nothing in the Old Testament 403 00:13:11,332 --> 00:13:12,459 about defamatory bricks? 404 00:13:12,459 --> 00:13:14,461 You think if Isaac chiseled something defamatory 405 00:13:14,461 --> 00:13:17,005 about Jedediah, you think it wouldn't be taken down? 406 00:13:17,005 --> 00:13:19,591 There's nothing in the Torah about defamatory bricks. 407 00:13:19,591 --> 00:13:21,426 - You know what this is, Rabbi? - What? 408 00:13:21,426 --> 00:13:22,927 This is a shanda. 409 00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:24,929 - Will you excuse me? - Certainly. 410 00:13:25,805 --> 00:13:29,100 Larry? 411 00:13:29,100 --> 00:13:32,771 - Oh, my God! This is crazy. - Look at this! Hey. 412 00:13:32,771 --> 00:13:34,105 Hi, again. 413 00:13:34,105 --> 00:13:35,565 - Again. - What a treat. 414 00:13:35,565 --> 00:13:38,443 Usually, most people you don't really wanna run into either, 415 00:13:38,443 --> 00:13:40,278 but I'm not minding this at all. 416 00:13:40,278 --> 00:13:41,780 - Me neither. Likewise. - Yeah. 417 00:13:41,780 --> 00:13:42,947 So, what are you doing here? 418 00:13:42,947 --> 00:13:45,700 I'm actually in the process of converting. 419 00:13:45,700 --> 00:13:47,077 - To Judaism. Yeah. - What? What? 420 00:13:47,077 --> 00:13:48,328 That's my rabbi and this is-- 421 00:13:48,328 --> 00:13:50,747 - Get the hell out of here. What? - I'm-- Yeah. I know. 422 00:13:50,747 --> 00:13:52,916 - You're joining the team? - I am. I am. 423 00:13:52,916 --> 00:13:55,210 We are so happy to have you. Thanks. 424 00:13:55,210 --> 00:13:56,961 Are you prepared to complain a lot? 425 00:13:56,961 --> 00:13:58,797 Please, I can kvetch with the best of them. 426 00:13:58,797 --> 00:14:00,507 - Come on. - Wow. 427 00:14:00,507 --> 00:14:02,050 - Very impressive. - Yeah. 428 00:14:02,050 --> 00:14:04,886 I'd be remiss if I didn't ask. Why? 429 00:14:04,886 --> 00:14:06,096 I like the whole thing. 430 00:14:06,096 --> 00:14:07,806 I like the food and the community, 431 00:14:07,806 --> 00:14:11,351 and truth be told, you know, I like the men. 432 00:14:11,351 --> 00:14:13,645 Aside from the obvious, you know, reasons. 433 00:14:13,645 --> 00:14:14,938 What, uh... 434 00:14:14,938 --> 00:14:16,981 These obvious reasons escape me. 435 00:14:16,981 --> 00:14:18,733 - What are they? - I mean, you know, the... 436 00:14:20,652 --> 00:14:22,112 Can't deal with the alternative. 437 00:14:22,112 --> 00:14:26,032 - Wow. - Yeah. 438 00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:28,118 - It's so good to see you. - Very good to see you, too. 439 00:14:28,118 --> 00:14:29,494 - I have one question for you. - Sure. 440 00:14:29,494 --> 00:14:31,913 - What is this wall? - Oh! This is, um-- 441 00:14:31,913 --> 00:14:33,915 It-- It's a-- It's, uh, for tennis. 442 00:14:33,915 --> 00:14:35,834 They put the winners of the tournament up. 443 00:14:35,834 --> 00:14:37,335 You guys do a temple tennis tournament? 444 00:14:37,335 --> 00:14:38,837 - They have a temple tourn-- - I am obsessed 445 00:14:38,837 --> 00:14:41,965 - with tennis. - No, yeah, I know, but it's just a wall, and-- 446 00:14:41,965 --> 00:14:44,926 Yeah, you should enter the tournament next year. 447 00:14:44,926 --> 00:14:46,261 The temple has-- They have a temple tournament? 448 00:14:46,261 --> 00:14:47,929 - The temple tournament, yeah. - Mixed doubles? 449 00:14:47,929 --> 00:14:49,556 - Come on. Yes. - Mixed doubles, yeah. 450 00:14:49,556 --> 00:14:50,765 Amazing. How's everything? 451 00:14:50,765 --> 00:14:53,351 How's the whole court case? How's everything working out? 452 00:14:53,351 --> 00:14:55,687 It's scary, yeah. It's a frightening prospect. 453 00:14:55,687 --> 00:14:57,230 I mean, I could plead guilty 454 00:14:57,230 --> 00:14:59,149 - and just get off but... - Oh, my... Oh, my God. 455 00:14:59,149 --> 00:15:01,192 - ...I'm not gonna do that. - Wow. 456 00:15:01,192 --> 00:15:02,527 And I don't think it's a big deal. 457 00:15:02,527 --> 00:15:04,029 That's so sweet. 458 00:15:04,029 --> 00:15:07,907 Um, listen, I'm having a dinner party next week. 459 00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:10,160 I don't know if you're around, but I would... 460 00:15:10,160 --> 00:15:12,787 I'd love you to come. 461 00:15:12,787 --> 00:15:14,039 Really. There are so many people 462 00:15:14,039 --> 00:15:15,290 that would love to meet you and talk to you, 463 00:15:15,290 --> 00:15:17,459 and I would love to see you again. 464 00:15:17,459 --> 00:15:19,627 So, maybe? 465 00:15:19,627 --> 00:15:22,130 Next week sometime? If you're here. 466 00:15:22,130 --> 00:15:24,174 It would be an honor for all of us. 467 00:15:24,174 --> 00:15:25,925 What do you say? 468 00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:28,928 Ah. I don't think I can... 469 00:15:30,555 --> 00:15:31,556 make it. 470 00:15:32,557 --> 00:15:33,683 Okay. 471 00:15:33,683 --> 00:15:37,270 Well, let's just hope we can run into each other again. 472 00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:39,564 - Yeah, hope so. - Yeah. I gotta schmeitz. 473 00:15:39,564 --> 00:15:40,774 - But, um... - You what? 474 00:15:40,774 --> 00:15:42,359 - Schmeitz. - What's that one? 475 00:15:42,359 --> 00:15:44,944 - Gotta go. - Oh, yeah. 476 00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:47,072 - It's Yiddish. - That's a new one to me. 477 00:15:47,072 --> 00:15:48,239 Yeah, well, there you go. 478 00:15:52,911 --> 00:15:54,329 I'm running a little late, 479 00:15:54,329 --> 00:15:56,331 so you can just drop me off, right here would be perfect. 480 00:15:56,331 --> 00:15:57,791 - Are you sure? - Yeah, yeah. 481 00:15:57,791 --> 00:15:59,417 - I work right there. - All right. 482 00:15:59,417 --> 00:16:01,711 I don't mind taking you a little further if it's... 483 00:16:01,711 --> 00:16:04,339 No, this is great. I work right there. 484 00:16:04,339 --> 00:16:06,925 You mean-- Do you work above the Disney store? 485 00:16:06,925 --> 00:16:08,259 They have a office or something? 486 00:16:08,259 --> 00:16:11,096 No, I work at the Disney store. 487 00:16:11,096 --> 00:16:13,848 So, you're managing, uh, the different stores or-- 488 00:16:13,848 --> 00:16:15,016 - Oh, God no. No. - Accounting? 489 00:16:15,016 --> 00:16:16,351 That's-- I don't have the head for numbers. 490 00:16:16,351 --> 00:16:19,229 I'm so sorry. What-- I'm-- What do you do here? 491 00:16:19,229 --> 00:16:21,648 I'm a greeter, and I talk to the guests. 492 00:16:21,648 --> 00:16:25,026 I put on a costume, like, a princess, like... 493 00:16:25,026 --> 00:16:27,070 ...Snow White or Elsa 494 00:16:27,070 --> 00:16:29,447 or Ariel or Lilo or Stitch. 495 00:16:29,447 --> 00:16:32,992 My favorite is Mickey's favorite. 496 00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:34,619 Minnie Mouse. 497 00:16:35,787 --> 00:16:36,913 - It's the best. - Yeah. 498 00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:38,957 - And you do all of that... - Right there. 499 00:16:38,957 --> 00:16:40,500 - At the Disney store? - Yeah. 500 00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:42,002 You know what would be so helpful with that, 501 00:16:42,002 --> 00:16:43,253 - is the "store" part. - Yeah, I'm like, 502 00:16:43,253 --> 00:16:45,130 "Hello. Come in. 503 00:16:45,130 --> 00:16:47,132 The most magical store in the mall." 504 00:16:47,132 --> 00:16:50,301 You don't have any managerial or developmental role 505 00:16:50,301 --> 00:16:51,720 - at Disney at all? That's a-- - No. 506 00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:54,973 - I mean, I'm a senior character. - What's a junior character? 507 00:16:54,973 --> 00:16:56,391 I would say, like, mm, 508 00:16:56,391 --> 00:16:58,768 - Doc McStuffins. - Uh-huh. 509 00:16:58,768 --> 00:16:59,936 But listen, I gotta go. 510 00:16:59,936 --> 00:17:01,646 - I had so much fun last night. - Sure. 511 00:17:01,646 --> 00:17:03,857 - It was a great evening. Bye-bye. Okay. - I'll see you later. Bye. 512 00:17:05,316 --> 00:17:07,152 Oh, boy. 513 00:17:07,152 --> 00:17:08,903 Bye. 514 00:17:08,903 --> 00:17:10,155 All right. Save it for in there. 515 00:17:10,155 --> 00:17:12,323 - I will. - Don't drain the tank with me. 516 00:17:20,206 --> 00:17:21,541 How did you not know that? 517 00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:24,044 How would I know? We're talking about movies and music, 518 00:17:24,044 --> 00:17:25,337 and she tells me she works for Disney. 519 00:17:25,337 --> 00:17:26,838 You never asked her about her job? 520 00:17:26,838 --> 00:17:28,923 What about Disney? What department? 521 00:17:28,923 --> 00:17:30,258 Okay, Larry. She lives in Glendale. 522 00:17:30,258 --> 00:17:31,509 I just assumed she's like, you know, 523 00:17:31,509 --> 00:17:33,261 animation or something. She's right-- 524 00:17:33,261 --> 00:17:34,804 I didn't know she was working at the fucking Americana. 525 00:17:34,804 --> 00:17:37,265 I mean, I feel like I've been living a lie, I gotta be honest. 526 00:17:37,265 --> 00:17:39,267 I mean, I had this whole great thing in my head 527 00:17:39,267 --> 00:17:41,519 that I was excited about, and now I just feel crushed. 528 00:17:41,519 --> 00:17:43,980 Well, you had somebody who's accomplished. 529 00:17:43,980 --> 00:17:46,775 She had a status, and the status is gone. 530 00:17:46,775 --> 00:17:48,193 So, what is that saying about you? 531 00:17:48,193 --> 00:17:50,779 The thing is, is you're right. It does say something about me. 532 00:17:50,779 --> 00:17:55,033 The problem is this makes you reflect on who you are, 533 00:17:55,033 --> 00:17:56,326 because she's the same person. 534 00:17:56,326 --> 00:17:57,869 I mean, she has the same great stories. 535 00:17:57,869 --> 00:17:58,953 It's the same sense of humor. 536 00:17:58,953 --> 00:18:00,121 It's the same likes and dislikes, 537 00:18:00,121 --> 00:18:01,998 but it just-- it feels so different. 538 00:18:01,998 --> 00:18:03,833 I think there's a lesson to be learned here. 539 00:18:04,501 --> 00:18:07,295 Questions. Women like questions. 540 00:18:07,295 --> 00:18:09,214 When you have a date with someone, you go out, 541 00:18:09,214 --> 00:18:10,715 you've gotta ask a ton of questions. 542 00:18:10,715 --> 00:18:12,467 Otherwise, they're going back to their friends, 543 00:18:12,467 --> 00:18:13,718 and you know what they're saying? 544 00:18:13,718 --> 00:18:16,096 "He didn't ask me one question." They love questions. 545 00:18:16,096 --> 00:18:18,640 - What would you do? Honestly. - I'm so superficial, 546 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:20,684 - I'd probably break up. - You would? Right away? 547 00:18:20,684 --> 00:18:23,353 Yeah. I'm not-- I'm not gonna date Minnie Mouse. 548 00:18:23,353 --> 00:18:25,730 I think the thing I gotta do is at least kind of try. 549 00:18:25,730 --> 00:18:28,066 You know, spend some time with her and bridge the gap. 550 00:18:28,066 --> 00:18:30,235 - Oh, my God. - What is it? 551 00:18:31,486 --> 00:18:32,821 I gave her a script to read. 552 00:18:32,821 --> 00:18:35,031 - She said she'd be happy to! - Well, why didn't you ask her 553 00:18:35,031 --> 00:18:36,074 what kind of development she did? 554 00:18:36,074 --> 00:18:37,200 Why is she taking a script? 555 00:18:37,200 --> 00:18:38,576 Are you gonna listen to the notes? 556 00:18:38,576 --> 00:18:40,995 Oh, yeah, I'm gonna listen to the notes from Minnie Mouse! 557 00:18:40,995 --> 00:18:44,582 The callback to the Corona ad on the beach? 558 00:18:44,582 --> 00:18:47,544 - So, so good. I loved that part. - You liked-- Okay. 559 00:18:47,544 --> 00:18:49,087 - Okay. Thank God. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 560 00:18:49,087 --> 00:18:50,505 - Thank you. - Honestly, Dana, 561 00:18:50,505 --> 00:18:54,843 it's really refreshing to see a comedic, apocalyptic show. 562 00:18:54,843 --> 00:18:56,094 So you're buying the whole premise? 563 00:18:56,094 --> 00:18:57,637 - Oh, I'm-- Totally. - You believe it? That's great. 564 00:18:57,637 --> 00:19:00,265 - 'Cause it is out-there. - And when it comes to questions, 565 00:19:00,265 --> 00:19:01,725 - one last thing. - Yeah. 566 00:19:01,725 --> 00:19:02,809 - Meg. - Meg. 567 00:19:02,809 --> 00:19:05,353 - I didn't understand... - You didn't understand? 568 00:19:05,353 --> 00:19:07,439 - Yeah, I didn't-- I didn't-- - Like, what she wanted? 569 00:19:07,439 --> 00:19:08,690 - Yeah. - No, I struggled with that. 570 00:19:08,690 --> 00:19:10,400 She's a little one dimensional right now. 571 00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:11,943 - I had more in there. - You did? 572 00:19:11,943 --> 00:19:13,778 Her backstory, what she went to school for, all that stuff, 573 00:19:13,778 --> 00:19:16,364 - and I took it out last minute. - I think you should put it back. 574 00:19:16,364 --> 00:19:17,615 That's so easy. I can do that. 575 00:19:17,615 --> 00:19:19,617 Yeah, and, um, does it feel long? 576 00:19:19,617 --> 00:19:22,162 - Yes, and I almost trimmed it. - It does feel long. 577 00:19:22,162 --> 00:19:23,872 - Yes, I almost trimmed it. - Okay. 578 00:19:23,872 --> 00:19:25,749 - I'm so embarrassed. I know. I just need to tighten it up. - No, don't be! 579 00:19:25,749 --> 00:19:28,918 Dana, I think you have such a good script here. 580 00:19:28,918 --> 00:19:31,129 - Thank you so much. - You're getting me so excited, 581 00:19:31,129 --> 00:19:34,382 and I just wanna thank you for letting me read it. 582 00:19:34,382 --> 00:19:37,218 - Are you kidding me? Thank you for reading it. - No, seriously. 583 00:19:37,218 --> 00:19:38,595 And if there's anything else you want me to read... 584 00:19:38,595 --> 00:19:40,638 - Are you serious? - Of course. 585 00:19:40,638 --> 00:19:43,433 I'm so excited for you and your future. 586 00:19:43,433 --> 00:19:45,977 Oh, my God, oh, my God. We're coming out with a new line 587 00:19:45,977 --> 00:19:48,521 of Little Mermaid sleepwear, and I get a discount, 588 00:19:48,521 --> 00:19:50,648 so if you text me your sizes, I can hook you up. 589 00:19:51,566 --> 00:19:52,984 Amazing. 590 00:19:52,984 --> 00:19:54,361 Hey, you want some of this? 591 00:19:54,361 --> 00:19:56,237 - You wash your hands? - No. 592 00:19:56,237 --> 00:19:57,655 Yeah. 'Cause you're making it for yourself, 593 00:19:57,655 --> 00:19:59,366 so you're doing all this stuff like a third base coach. No. 594 00:19:59,366 --> 00:20:00,700 What you guys talking about? 595 00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:03,661 Hey, hey! Look at this. I come bearing gifts. 596 00:20:03,661 --> 00:20:06,206 - Oh, shit, man. Don't do this. - What do we think it is? 597 00:20:06,206 --> 00:20:08,124 - Oh. Are you kidding me? - No. 598 00:20:08,124 --> 00:20:09,626 - Wow. - You said you liked it, 599 00:20:09,626 --> 00:20:11,753 - so I'm giving it to you. - I did say that. 600 00:20:11,753 --> 00:20:12,796 Come on, do us the honors. 601 00:20:12,796 --> 00:20:14,798 - Oh, I'ma put this shit on, man. - That's something. 602 00:20:14,798 --> 00:20:16,174 - Wow. - Looking sharp. 603 00:20:16,174 --> 00:20:18,176 - Holy cow. - I think it looks incredible. 604 00:20:18,176 --> 00:20:20,178 Anybody wanna get Chinese food for lunch today? 605 00:20:20,178 --> 00:20:22,138 - Nah. Fuck that. - I unfortunately can't 606 00:20:22,138 --> 00:20:23,390 'cause I gotta see Minnie Mouse. 607 00:20:23,390 --> 00:20:24,849 You know, I'm gonna have a better attitude about it. 608 00:20:24,849 --> 00:20:26,810 - She's the same person, right? - Same person. 609 00:20:26,810 --> 00:20:29,354 I got a date, I'm gonna keep it, and I'm gonna make it work. 610 00:20:29,354 --> 00:20:30,438 - Okay. - Thank you for everything. 611 00:20:30,438 --> 00:20:31,690 - Sure. - Appreciate it too, man. 612 00:20:31,690 --> 00:20:34,234 - I appreciate you. - Appreciate you, Secret Santa. 613 00:20:34,234 --> 00:20:36,361 Jesus, that's amazing he gave you that jacket. 614 00:20:36,361 --> 00:20:38,071 - That was so nice. - Know what it is? 615 00:20:38,071 --> 00:20:39,489 It's the "I like it" gambit. 616 00:20:39,489 --> 00:20:40,949 All you gotta do is compliment people 617 00:20:40,949 --> 00:20:42,117 on what the fuck they're wearing, 618 00:20:42,117 --> 00:20:43,535 next thing you know, they gonna give you one. 619 00:20:43,535 --> 00:20:45,745 You know what? It's not a bad idea. 620 00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:47,372 It's a fucking great idea. Shit, man. 621 00:20:47,372 --> 00:20:49,708 I'll bet that works like 50 percent of the time. 622 00:20:49,708 --> 00:20:51,626 Wish I had a suede do-rag to go with this motherfucker. 623 00:20:51,626 --> 00:20:53,044 - Mm-hmm. Yeah. - That'd be nice. 624 00:20:53,044 --> 00:20:54,254 Put that bitch on. 625 00:20:54,254 --> 00:20:56,089 And I just tell 'em, "I like that bullshit 626 00:20:56,089 --> 00:20:57,424 you got on." You know? 627 00:20:58,633 --> 00:21:00,427 You know what? Fuck you, Larry. 628 00:21:00,427 --> 00:21:03,596 Fuck you, Larry! 629 00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:05,223 So, what's going on? 630 00:21:05,223 --> 00:21:07,058 You know, not that much. 631 00:21:07,058 --> 00:21:08,727 What is, uh-- What is this material? 632 00:21:08,727 --> 00:21:10,729 - What do you call this material? - Cotton. 633 00:21:10,729 --> 00:21:13,231 - You think this is cotton? - Why are you here? 634 00:21:13,231 --> 00:21:14,482 Um, well, 635 00:21:14,482 --> 00:21:16,443 - it's very simple, really. - Okay. 636 00:21:16,443 --> 00:21:17,944 Um, so they renovated the temple, 637 00:21:17,944 --> 00:21:19,821 and they have this plaza, and they were selling 638 00:21:19,821 --> 00:21:20,989 these bricks for charity. 639 00:21:20,989 --> 00:21:24,409 And Hobie Turner wrote something very defamatory about me, 640 00:21:24,409 --> 00:21:25,910 and it's there for everyone to see. 641 00:21:25,910 --> 00:21:28,246 It says, "Larry David is disrespectful to women." 642 00:21:28,246 --> 00:21:29,706 Come on, Cheryl. I'm not disrespect-- 643 00:21:29,706 --> 00:21:31,624 I love women. Who loves women more than me? 644 00:21:31,624 --> 00:21:34,878 I love having sex with them. I love talking to them. 645 00:21:34,878 --> 00:21:36,129 I'm a champion of women. 646 00:21:36,129 --> 00:21:37,630 Being a champion to women 647 00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:39,466 - is saying you love-- - Well, I'm attracted to women. 648 00:21:39,466 --> 00:21:41,009 - I like them. - Okay. 649 00:21:41,009 --> 00:21:42,510 There's a difference. Okay. 650 00:21:42,510 --> 00:21:46,931 So, I'd like to refute his brick by having somebody who I know 651 00:21:46,931 --> 00:21:48,933 - write something nice about me. - On the brick? 652 00:21:48,933 --> 00:21:52,270 Yes. "I was married to Larry David for many years, 653 00:21:52,270 --> 00:21:54,606 and he's a veritable champion of women." 654 00:21:54,606 --> 00:21:56,316 Something like that, right next to it. 655 00:21:56,316 --> 00:21:58,234 They'll read his first. They'll read yours second. 656 00:21:58,234 --> 00:22:00,111 You buy a brick. 657 00:22:00,111 --> 00:22:02,614 I don't think so. 658 00:22:02,614 --> 00:22:05,742 - Why not? - Eh, it doesn't feel right. 659 00:22:05,742 --> 00:22:07,369 What? What's not right? 660 00:22:07,369 --> 00:22:09,954 - Because it sounds bullshitty. - Okay, well, you don't have to say that exactly. 661 00:22:09,954 --> 00:22:11,164 You can say anything. 662 00:22:11,164 --> 00:22:12,957 Say something nice. Can you-- You think you could come up 663 00:22:12,957 --> 00:22:14,876 - with something nice? - Hey, Cheryl? 664 00:22:14,876 --> 00:22:16,294 - I mean... - Oh. 665 00:22:16,294 --> 00:22:17,629 - Hi. - Hi, Larry. 666 00:22:17,629 --> 00:22:19,297 - Hi. - Can we run lines 667 00:22:19,297 --> 00:22:21,424 - when he goes? - Well, Larry 668 00:22:21,424 --> 00:22:23,134 has a defamatory brick, 669 00:22:23,134 --> 00:22:24,844 and he wants me to buy more bricks. 670 00:22:24,844 --> 00:22:27,514 Yeah, somebody wrote a defamatory brick about me. 671 00:22:27,514 --> 00:22:29,683 It says, "Larry David is disrespectful to women." 672 00:22:29,683 --> 00:22:32,477 - Ouch, ouch. - Terrible, terrible thing to say. And I love women, Ted. 673 00:22:32,477 --> 00:22:34,312 Well, he loves having sex with women, 674 00:22:34,312 --> 00:22:36,690 and he thinks that that proves 675 00:22:36,690 --> 00:22:38,525 - that he respects women. - Well, that, 676 00:22:38,525 --> 00:22:40,318 and there are other things, too. 677 00:22:40,318 --> 00:22:43,321 Larry, completely understand. 678 00:22:43,321 --> 00:22:45,156 The deal is we already bought a brick. 679 00:22:45,156 --> 00:22:46,491 - Oh. Yeah. - Right? Didn't we? 680 00:22:46,491 --> 00:22:48,201 - We already bought a brick. - You already bought a brick? 681 00:22:48,201 --> 00:22:50,620 You didn't even know what I was talking about when I brought up the brick. 682 00:22:50,620 --> 00:22:52,664 You probably told me and I forgot or something. 683 00:22:52,664 --> 00:22:54,624 - I don't know. But-- - I might-- I might-- 684 00:22:54,624 --> 00:22:56,292 You know, maybe I forgot to tell you. 685 00:22:56,292 --> 00:22:58,670 - I'm sorry. But we did. We bought a brick. - Yeah. Ted does a lot of things. 686 00:22:58,670 --> 00:23:01,423 - He does-- He's very charitable. - You bought a brick, huh? 687 00:23:01,423 --> 00:23:03,883 - Yes. - What does your brick say, Ted? 688 00:23:03,883 --> 00:23:05,802 Nothing. We left it blank. 689 00:23:05,802 --> 00:23:07,637 - The brick says nothing? - Yeah. 690 00:23:07,637 --> 00:23:10,223 You know, we're raising money. We're not trying to advertise. 691 00:23:10,223 --> 00:23:11,599 I don't think you bought a brick. 692 00:23:11,599 --> 00:23:13,518 - What do you think about that? - Yeah. Look, the point is 693 00:23:13,518 --> 00:23:15,520 we bought a fucking brick, Larry. 694 00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:17,522 Okay, I'll tell you what. I'll make it very easy for you. 695 00:23:17,522 --> 00:23:20,150 I'll buy the brick. I'll write something nice. 696 00:23:20,150 --> 00:23:21,818 All you gotta do is put your name on it. 697 00:23:21,818 --> 00:23:23,570 - I don't feel comfortable. - What? I mean, 698 00:23:23,570 --> 00:23:25,697 what if it just said, "I was married to Larry David, 699 00:23:25,697 --> 00:23:28,033 - and he's a decent guy"? - Who writes that on a brick? 700 00:23:28,033 --> 00:23:30,535 - Yeah. It's dishonest. - Well, then you write it. 701 00:23:30,535 --> 00:23:32,245 Well, I don't have anything to say on a brick. 702 00:23:32,245 --> 00:23:34,164 - Yeah. There you go. - You can't think of one 703 00:23:34,164 --> 00:23:35,540 nice thing to say about me on a brick? 704 00:23:35,540 --> 00:23:36,583 No, not on a brick. 705 00:23:36,583 --> 00:23:38,251 All right, so just for argument's sake, 706 00:23:38,251 --> 00:23:39,419 is there anything nice 707 00:23:39,419 --> 00:23:41,046 you could say about me that's not on a brick? 708 00:23:41,963 --> 00:23:43,715 Yes. 709 00:23:44,215 --> 00:23:46,051 Something on a cake. 710 00:23:46,051 --> 00:23:49,512 -"Congratulations." "Good job." -"Happy birthday." 711 00:23:49,512 --> 00:23:52,390 "He's a good golfer, sometimes." You want some more tea? 712 00:23:52,390 --> 00:23:55,101 - Is that what you were coming in here for? Okay. - Yes, I'd love some more tea. 713 00:23:55,101 --> 00:23:58,146 How much longer do you think you'll be staying, Larry? 714 00:23:58,730 --> 00:24:00,482 I'm leaving right now. 715 00:24:00,482 --> 00:24:03,068 I just need to learn these lines, that's all. 716 00:24:03,068 --> 00:24:04,486 Nice pen. 717 00:24:04,486 --> 00:24:06,112 - Thank you. - Good pen. Look at that pen. 718 00:24:06,112 --> 00:24:08,198 - That's some pen. - Thank you. 719 00:24:08,198 --> 00:24:09,741 Yeah, how do you get a pen like that? 720 00:24:09,741 --> 00:24:11,284 Do you want the pen, Larry? 721 00:24:11,284 --> 00:24:12,452 Oh, I'm not gonna take your pen. 722 00:24:12,452 --> 00:24:13,828 - Take the pen. - Really? 723 00:24:13,828 --> 00:24:16,247 - Yes, take the pen. - You're giving me your pen? 724 00:24:16,247 --> 00:24:17,665 Good luck with the brick. 725 00:24:19,542 --> 00:24:22,754 Okay. How's this? "He's an amiable fellow 726 00:24:22,754 --> 00:24:25,548 and a big supporter of Title Nine." 727 00:24:25,548 --> 00:24:27,092 - Oh, bullshit. - All right. 728 00:24:27,092 --> 00:24:33,264 "He's an amiable fellow who's attended two WNBA games." 729 00:24:33,264 --> 00:24:34,641 - Is that true? - No. 730 00:24:34,641 --> 00:24:35,975 And besides, you never went to one 731 00:24:35,975 --> 00:24:39,020 of Sammy's softball games. I invited you so many times. 732 00:24:39,020 --> 00:24:40,522 The kid couldn't even lift up a pencil. 733 00:24:40,522 --> 00:24:41,606 Oh, stop it. 734 00:24:41,606 --> 00:24:44,442 - She's very talented! - All right, how 'bout this? 735 00:24:44,442 --> 00:24:46,861 "Any woman who Larry David impregnated, 736 00:24:46,861 --> 00:24:49,030 he not only paid for the abortion, 737 00:24:49,030 --> 00:24:52,075 but accompanied her to the procedure." 738 00:24:52,075 --> 00:24:54,577 - That's true. - You're wasting my time. Leave. 739 00:24:54,577 --> 00:24:56,538 - You're not gonna buy a brick? - Apparently not. 740 00:25:21,896 --> 00:25:23,898 - Hello? - Hey, Larry. It's Cyrus. 741 00:25:23,898 --> 00:25:26,026 - Irma's sponsor. - Yeah, I know who you are. 742 00:25:26,026 --> 00:25:28,319 Yeah, look, I just wanted to call you because my daughter 743 00:25:28,319 --> 00:25:30,071 met with that woman you recommended. 744 00:25:30,071 --> 00:25:32,407 - Uh, Jenna. - Yeah, look, um... 745 00:25:32,407 --> 00:25:33,491 You gotta-- 746 00:25:33,491 --> 00:25:35,952 - She was great. - What? 747 00:25:35,952 --> 00:25:38,204 My daughter said she gave great notes. 748 00:25:38,204 --> 00:25:39,622 She made the script better. 749 00:25:39,622 --> 00:25:40,999 - She was amazing. - Seriously? 750 00:25:40,999 --> 00:25:43,460 Yeah! I thought she wouldn't even give her the time of day. 751 00:25:43,460 --> 00:25:44,753 Yeah, for a high-powered executive, 752 00:25:44,753 --> 00:25:46,046 she's very down to Earth, isn't she? 753 00:25:46,046 --> 00:25:47,047 Yeah. Right? 754 00:25:47,047 --> 00:25:48,965 - They even met at a coffee shop. - I know. 755 00:25:48,965 --> 00:25:51,134 You'd think she's just a regular person. 756 00:25:51,134 --> 00:25:53,345 Anyway, Dana wanted to send her some flowers 757 00:25:53,345 --> 00:25:54,512 to her office at Disney. 758 00:25:54,512 --> 00:25:56,389 So, if you could shoot me her address. 759 00:25:56,389 --> 00:25:57,557 Eh, you know, I don't-- 760 00:25:57,557 --> 00:25:58,892 I don't think you need to do that. 761 00:25:58,892 --> 00:26:00,560 Well, I live by the Americana in Glendale. 762 00:26:00,560 --> 00:26:02,187 I could just go over and get a gift card 763 00:26:02,187 --> 00:26:03,146 and send it over. 764 00:26:03,146 --> 00:26:04,981 - How 'bout that? - No, not necessary. 765 00:26:04,981 --> 00:26:06,524 I'll just pass on, um, 766 00:26:06,524 --> 00:26:08,318 - your enthusiasm. - Larry! 767 00:26:08,318 --> 00:26:09,527 Okay, well, you know best... 768 00:26:09,527 --> 00:26:11,696 Larry, where are my sleep brassieres? 769 00:26:11,696 --> 00:26:13,531 - How the fuck do I know? - Seriously, 770 00:26:13,531 --> 00:26:16,159 I just wanna say, I owe you one. I really do. 771 00:26:16,159 --> 00:26:18,036 If there's anything I can do for you... 772 00:26:18,036 --> 00:26:21,039 - Larry! - What? 773 00:26:21,039 --> 00:26:22,707 - So, uh... - Never mind. 774 00:26:22,707 --> 00:26:24,209 They were in the hamper. They're not that dirty. 775 00:26:24,209 --> 00:26:26,336 Anything you need from me, you just say the word, okay? 776 00:26:26,336 --> 00:26:28,880 You know, um... now that you mention it, 777 00:26:28,880 --> 00:26:31,049 there actually is something you can do. 778 00:26:31,049 --> 00:26:32,258 Yeah, say the word. 779 00:26:32,258 --> 00:26:35,387 According to your timeline, 780 00:26:36,471 --> 00:26:38,848 I have eight weeks left with Irma. 781 00:26:38,848 --> 00:26:43,603 I'm wondering if there's any possible way 782 00:26:43,603 --> 00:26:46,356 - that we can move that up. - Wait. 783 00:26:46,356 --> 00:26:49,234 You're saying you want to break up with her early? 784 00:26:49,234 --> 00:26:50,944 Yes, that's exactly what I mean. 785 00:26:50,944 --> 00:26:53,655 - Is there any reason? - Yeah, I hate her. 786 00:26:53,655 --> 00:26:54,989 That's the reason. How's that? 787 00:26:54,989 --> 00:26:56,741 Look, I don't know what to tell you. 788 00:26:56,741 --> 00:26:57,992 I'm struggling here, Cyrus, 789 00:26:57,992 --> 00:27:00,954 and Sienna Miller is interested in me. 790 00:27:02,038 --> 00:27:03,248 - I'm not joking. - Really? 791 00:27:03,248 --> 00:27:06,042 She is. When is this gonna happen again? Never. 792 00:27:06,042 --> 00:27:08,211 So, come on. G... 793 00:27:08,211 --> 00:27:10,255 Help a brother out. Is there anything we can do? 794 00:27:10,255 --> 00:27:12,007 Larry, I appreciate everything you've done for us, 795 00:27:12,007 --> 00:27:13,800 but a breakup would just set her back, 796 00:27:13,800 --> 00:27:15,260 and I can't allow that to happen. 797 00:27:15,260 --> 00:27:16,428 Is that better than murder? 798 00:27:16,428 --> 00:27:18,763 Who benefits from murder? She's dead and I'm in prison. 799 00:27:18,763 --> 00:27:21,433 Larry, I think you're saying a lot of things you don't mean right now. 800 00:27:21,433 --> 00:27:22,475 No, no, I mean it. 801 00:27:22,475 --> 00:27:23,810 Come on. There's gotta be a way. 802 00:27:23,810 --> 00:27:26,187 If she were to break up with you, 803 00:27:26,187 --> 00:27:28,690 - I guess that would be okay. - Her idea? 804 00:27:28,690 --> 00:27:30,608 Then that would give her the power, 805 00:27:30,608 --> 00:27:32,235 - give her her own agency. - Oh, yeah. 806 00:27:32,235 --> 00:27:33,236 Like it's gonna be her idea. 807 00:27:33,236 --> 00:27:35,238 On what planet? That's never gonna happen. 808 00:27:35,238 --> 00:27:37,115 I'm sorry. But thank you. 809 00:27:38,033 --> 00:27:40,952 Larry, where are my bunion splints? 810 00:27:40,952 --> 00:27:43,246 Today was amazing, though. 'Cause you know Penny? 811 00:27:43,246 --> 00:27:44,873 She's normally a chipmunk, 812 00:27:44,873 --> 00:27:46,124 Chip or Dale, and she's in, like, 813 00:27:46,124 --> 00:27:47,834 - what we call fur all the time. - Right. 814 00:27:47,834 --> 00:27:49,461 She got to be Tinkerbell this week, 815 00:27:49,461 --> 00:27:52,464 and it was unbelievable, and we were so happy for her. 816 00:27:52,464 --> 00:27:53,798 And she was so good with the kids. 817 00:27:53,798 --> 00:27:56,134 And she was just having the best time ever, 818 00:27:56,134 --> 00:27:58,053 because she's never a face character. 819 00:27:58,053 --> 00:28:00,805 I mean, she's a little tall to be a pixie, 820 00:28:00,805 --> 00:28:02,223 but she was incredible. 821 00:28:02,223 --> 00:28:03,141 And they had a Peter Pan. 822 00:28:03,141 --> 00:28:04,559 - Right. - Ian was being Peter Pan 823 00:28:04,559 --> 00:28:05,935 that day, and the chemistry was... 824 00:28:07,687 --> 00:28:09,064 - Welcome back, sir. - Thank you. 825 00:28:09,064 --> 00:28:11,733 I'd like a table for two by the aquarium. 826 00:28:11,733 --> 00:28:13,318 - That table is reserved. - Mm. 827 00:28:13,318 --> 00:28:15,612 But we have nice table over here by window. 828 00:28:15,612 --> 00:28:17,614 - Oh, it's reserved? - Yes. 829 00:28:17,614 --> 00:28:18,990 Okay, we'll go over there. 830 00:28:18,990 --> 00:28:21,284 Okay. You follow me, sir. This way. 831 00:28:21,284 --> 00:28:22,577 All right. Okay. 832 00:28:31,086 --> 00:28:33,463 Sir. Sir. Sir, can I help you? 833 00:28:33,463 --> 00:28:34,881 - Excuse me, sir. - Hmm. 834 00:28:34,881 --> 00:28:36,591 Your table that way. 835 00:28:36,591 --> 00:28:38,718 Yeah, what happened to the orange fish 836 00:28:38,718 --> 00:28:39,844 that was stuck? 837 00:28:39,844 --> 00:28:42,639 Fish sad, so we changed new location. 838 00:28:42,639 --> 00:28:44,808 Change of scenery make much happy fish. 839 00:28:44,808 --> 00:28:46,059 So, you moved the fish? 840 00:28:46,059 --> 00:28:48,019 Yes. Fish living best life in downtown. 841 00:28:48,019 --> 00:28:50,313 - Very happy there. - That was so nice of you. 842 00:28:50,313 --> 00:28:52,399 You can go visit your new friend, orange fish. 843 00:28:52,399 --> 00:28:54,859 I can handle the death of the fish. Just tell me. 844 00:28:54,859 --> 00:28:57,404 Fish fine. Fish thriving. 845 00:28:57,404 --> 00:28:59,781 No, no, fish stuck. Fish dead. 846 00:28:59,781 --> 00:29:02,450 No. Fish sick. Fish gone. 847 00:29:02,450 --> 00:29:03,743 Stuck. Dead. 848 00:29:03,743 --> 00:29:07,372 - Sick, gone! Sick, gone! - Stuck, dead! Stuck, dead! 849 00:29:07,372 --> 00:29:11,960 - Fish not your problem anymore. - I will not forget fish. 850 00:29:14,921 --> 00:29:17,590 Okay, I bring your table some water. 851 00:29:17,590 --> 00:29:20,719 - How's your fish? - Fish dead. 852 00:29:20,719 --> 00:29:22,846 Listen to me. You should've heard Irma 853 00:29:22,846 --> 00:29:24,222 today at the AA meeting. 854 00:29:24,222 --> 00:29:26,850 You would've been blown away. She shared for a half hour. 855 00:29:26,850 --> 00:29:29,269 - Well, what did she say? - I-- First of all, 856 00:29:29,269 --> 00:29:30,311 I would never tell you. 857 00:29:30,311 --> 00:29:32,397 In AA, there's principles, there's guidelines. 858 00:29:32,397 --> 00:29:35,734 So, any wino in Santa Monica can hear what she's saying, 859 00:29:35,734 --> 00:29:38,069 - but I can't? - AA is private, man. That's it. 860 00:29:38,069 --> 00:29:40,238 - I'm not gonna tell anybody. - I just won't do it. 861 00:29:40,238 --> 00:29:41,948 But we're good friends. We tell each other everything. 862 00:29:41,948 --> 00:29:43,742 - I'm not telling you. - So, you're not gonna tell me? 863 00:29:43,742 --> 00:29:45,452 - No. - Hmm. 864 00:29:45,452 --> 00:29:47,078 Suppose I put you in my will? 865 00:29:47,078 --> 00:29:49,789 Her first husband, horrible accident, 866 00:29:49,789 --> 00:29:52,542 and she was with him 24/7, like a caregiver. 867 00:29:52,542 --> 00:29:54,669 - Was he in a wheelchair? - Worse. 868 00:29:54,669 --> 00:29:57,213 - Diapers? - He had diapers everywhere. 869 00:29:57,213 --> 00:30:00,342 He was like a fucking mummy. He lost some of his toes. 870 00:30:00,342 --> 00:30:03,053 - His spine was sticking out. - Oh, my God. 871 00:30:03,053 --> 00:30:04,971 He couldn't move. He couldn't walk. 872 00:30:04,971 --> 00:30:06,973 And she started to drink more and more, 873 00:30:06,973 --> 00:30:08,683 and then she became an alcoholic over this. 874 00:30:08,683 --> 00:30:09,976 And then one day she woke up, she went, 875 00:30:09,976 --> 00:30:12,270 "You know, this is not the way I envisioned my life." 876 00:30:12,270 --> 00:30:14,022 So, she just left the guy high and dry. 877 00:30:14,022 --> 00:30:15,398 'Cause she didn't want to take care of him? 878 00:30:15,398 --> 00:30:17,067 Yeah, 'cause she wanted to think about her own life. 879 00:30:17,067 --> 00:30:19,611 Selfish. That's her husband. 880 00:30:19,611 --> 00:30:20,779 She never wanted to see him again. 881 00:30:20,779 --> 00:30:21,905 It was the diapers. 882 00:30:21,905 --> 00:30:23,865 She said she wasn't proud of it, 883 00:30:23,865 --> 00:30:26,076 but if the situation happened again, 884 00:30:26,076 --> 00:30:28,870 she would do the same thing. She would still split. 885 00:30:28,870 --> 00:30:31,122 You know, she knows what she wants in life. 886 00:30:31,122 --> 00:30:33,124 Let me ask you something. 887 00:30:33,124 --> 00:30:35,418 How much were you thinking about leaving me? 888 00:30:36,002 --> 00:30:37,962 Oh. No, nothing. Yeah. 889 00:30:38,505 --> 00:30:39,673 - What? - It was a trick 890 00:30:39,673 --> 00:30:41,675 to get you to talk about it, which you did. 891 00:30:41,675 --> 00:30:43,301 In three minutes, I lost all that money? 892 00:30:43,301 --> 00:30:44,844 You shouldn't have told me. That's all it took 893 00:30:44,844 --> 00:30:46,930 to get it out of you, your solemn AA oath? 894 00:30:46,930 --> 00:30:48,014 They should kick you out of there. 895 00:30:48,014 --> 00:30:49,599 - I have weaknesses. - I got a good mind 896 00:30:49,599 --> 00:30:51,101 - to squeal on you. - Now, let's eat. 897 00:31:04,698 --> 00:31:05,990 Um, hey, Larry. Sor-- Uh... 898 00:31:05,990 --> 00:31:08,076 Oh, my God. What... 899 00:31:08,660 --> 00:31:09,828 What's going on here? 900 00:31:09,828 --> 00:31:12,330 I was, uh, working late last night. I-- 901 00:31:12,330 --> 00:31:14,708 I got kicked out of my house, so... 902 00:31:14,708 --> 00:31:16,334 You got kicked out of your house? 903 00:31:16,334 --> 00:31:17,669 Yeah, yeah. Come on in. 904 00:31:17,669 --> 00:31:19,963 Um, did we have a meeting or something? 905 00:31:19,963 --> 00:31:21,131 Why'd you get kicked out? 906 00:31:21,131 --> 00:31:23,049 - What happened? - Well, quite frankly, you know, 907 00:31:23,049 --> 00:31:25,385 you stuck this thing in my head about naming babies, 908 00:31:25,385 --> 00:31:27,887 and we got in a big fight, and things were thrown, 909 00:31:27,887 --> 00:31:30,265 and you got in the middle of everything, and now, 910 00:31:30,265 --> 00:31:31,933 you know, we don't know what we're gonna name the baby. 911 00:31:31,933 --> 00:31:33,893 - Oh, so it's my fault. - Larry, you planted this thing 912 00:31:33,893 --> 00:31:35,437 in our head, and then you brought up semen. 913 00:31:35,437 --> 00:31:37,814 Like, that's none of your business about I-- 914 00:31:37,814 --> 00:31:40,859 - what I do with my own semen. - Oh, are you telling me that if it's your semen, 915 00:31:40,859 --> 00:31:42,527 you shouldn't have the right to name the baby? 916 00:31:42,527 --> 00:31:44,195 - Yeah, but it's my business. - It's your semen. 917 00:31:44,195 --> 00:31:45,780 I don't tell you what to do with your semen. 918 00:31:45,780 --> 00:31:46,990 Well, what am I gonna do with semen? 919 00:31:46,990 --> 00:31:49,367 A normal man knows what to do with semen. 920 00:31:49,367 --> 00:31:51,870 I do normal things with semen. I wipe it up and throw it away. 921 00:31:51,870 --> 00:31:52,996 What else could you do with semen? 922 00:31:52,996 --> 00:31:54,664 Well, you could impregnate somebody else 923 00:31:54,664 --> 00:31:55,874 and have a baby. 924 00:31:55,874 --> 00:31:57,834 Okay. If I did do that and my partner's name 925 00:31:57,834 --> 00:31:59,044 was Papalopadopalous, 926 00:31:59,044 --> 00:32:00,587 I would use David as the last name. 927 00:32:00,587 --> 00:32:02,505 Okay, and you know what? That would be your prerogative. 928 00:32:02,505 --> 00:32:04,424 And I wouldn't come to you and say you should name it 929 00:32:04,424 --> 00:32:06,051 this or that and start naming your baby. 930 00:32:06,051 --> 00:32:08,386 Yes. Yes, but you knew deep down 931 00:32:08,386 --> 00:32:09,721 - that I was right. - No, I didn't. 932 00:32:09,721 --> 00:32:11,139 And that's why you brought it up. 933 00:32:11,139 --> 00:32:12,932 That's why you had a fight. That's why you got kicked out. 934 00:32:12,932 --> 00:32:15,393 - Isn't that so? - Larry, you're out of order. 935 00:32:15,393 --> 00:32:19,397 Let me name my own baby with my husband. End of story. 936 00:32:19,397 --> 00:32:21,066 To tell you the truth, I'm kind of surprised 937 00:32:21,066 --> 00:32:22,400 you're sloughing off the blame on me. 938 00:32:22,400 --> 00:32:24,402 And I'm equally surprised you won't accept the blame. 939 00:32:24,402 --> 00:32:26,321 I think I'm way more surprised than you... 940 00:32:26,321 --> 00:32:28,323 - I think I'm-- - ...about the sloughing of the blame. 941 00:32:28,323 --> 00:32:32,369 And I'm really wildly surprised that you aren't accepting. 942 00:32:32,369 --> 00:32:33,995 I am so incredulous 943 00:32:33,995 --> 00:32:36,581 that you think I am more to blame than you. 944 00:32:36,581 --> 00:32:39,918 - What are you doing here, Larr? - Can I sue a temple? 945 00:32:39,918 --> 00:32:42,087 - For what? - There's a defamatory brick 946 00:32:42,087 --> 00:32:43,171 at that temple. Did-- 947 00:32:43,171 --> 00:32:45,131 - Oh, yeah. I saw that. Yeah. - You saw that? 948 00:32:45,131 --> 00:32:46,508 What was your reaction when you saw that? 949 00:32:46,508 --> 00:32:47,967 It's fine. They can do anything they want. 950 00:32:47,967 --> 00:32:49,260 - It's freedom of religion. - Freedom of religion? 951 00:32:49,260 --> 00:32:50,887 Yeah, they're protected by-- 952 00:32:50,887 --> 00:32:52,931 You just go around calling people assholes, and you put it on a temple? 953 00:32:52,931 --> 00:32:53,932 That's not slander? 954 00:32:53,932 --> 00:32:55,433 Anything else I can help you with? 955 00:32:55,934 --> 00:32:57,143 Hmm. 956 00:32:57,143 --> 00:32:59,270 How'd the, uh, the filing go? Are we good? 957 00:33:02,732 --> 00:33:03,900 Oh, God. 958 00:33:03,900 --> 00:33:05,485 Oh, my God. 959 00:33:05,485 --> 00:33:06,945 Wait a minute. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 960 00:33:06,945 --> 00:33:08,822 Oh, God. No, no. Don't-- Don't even say it. 961 00:33:08,822 --> 00:33:10,782 - Don't tell me. No. - I forgot to file it. 962 00:33:10,782 --> 00:33:12,450 You forgot to file it? 963 00:33:12,450 --> 00:33:13,993 - Yeah, I forgot to file it. - How could you forget to file it? 964 00:33:13,993 --> 00:33:15,245 I forgot to file it because of the shit 965 00:33:15,245 --> 00:33:16,621 - you put me through, Larry! - Oh, it's my fault? 966 00:33:16,621 --> 00:33:18,164 - Yes! - It's my fault you forgot to file? 967 00:33:18,164 --> 00:33:19,708 Yes! And if you accepted it, 968 00:33:19,708 --> 00:33:20,792 then this wouldn't have happened. 969 00:33:20,792 --> 00:33:22,585 Why did you get involved in my stuff? 970 00:33:22,585 --> 00:33:24,796 - Well, can you file it now? - No, I can't file it now. 971 00:33:24,796 --> 00:33:25,964 It's past the deadline. 972 00:33:25,964 --> 00:33:28,049 - It's past the deadline? - It's past the deadline. 973 00:33:28,049 --> 00:33:29,634 I missed it. 974 00:33:30,885 --> 00:33:32,387 Look, it's going to trial. 975 00:33:32,387 --> 00:33:34,764 - I can go to jail for a year! - You're not gonna go to jail. 976 00:33:34,764 --> 00:33:35,974 We're gonna win the trial. 977 00:33:35,974 --> 00:33:37,392 I'm confident we're going to win. 978 00:33:37,392 --> 00:33:40,770 Don't worry about a thing, okay? I'm gonna make this a priority. 979 00:33:40,770 --> 00:33:43,606 I know you don't wanna hear it, but I have to say it anyway. 980 00:33:43,606 --> 00:33:47,068 - What is it? - I think a great compromise... 981 00:33:48,361 --> 00:33:51,114 - is Ziggy Zeckelman. - Can you leave, please? 982 00:33:51,114 --> 00:33:53,324 I could so live with Zeckelman with a Ziggy. 983 00:33:53,324 --> 00:33:55,618 Listen to me for once. Do you wanna win this trial? 984 00:33:55,618 --> 00:33:57,287 - Yes. - Stop naming my baby. 985 00:33:59,456 --> 00:34:00,582 Okay. 986 00:34:01,332 --> 00:34:03,835 And you didn't like Foots? 987 00:34:03,835 --> 00:34:07,339 Got it. 988 00:34:14,346 --> 00:34:15,972 Tell me you got something good. 989 00:34:15,972 --> 00:34:17,849 - Oh, I got the goods. - Yeah? 990 00:34:17,849 --> 00:34:19,059 Oh, yeah. 991 00:34:19,059 --> 00:34:21,102 Got something that's gonna get us out of this mess 992 00:34:21,102 --> 00:34:23,730 - that we're both in. - All right, I'm all ears. 993 00:34:23,730 --> 00:34:25,774 Oh, by the way, the fish is dead. 994 00:34:26,858 --> 00:34:27,942 FYI. 995 00:34:27,942 --> 00:34:29,361 - Yeah? - Yeah. 996 00:34:30,111 --> 00:34:31,780 You know, in a weird way... 997 00:34:33,865 --> 00:34:37,035 ...I kind of feel like me and you are that little fish. 998 00:34:37,035 --> 00:34:39,329 We just wanna swim and enjoy our day, 999 00:34:39,329 --> 00:34:41,623 but we're stuck in that filter. 1000 00:34:41,623 --> 00:34:42,957 - That's true. - Right? 1001 00:34:42,957 --> 00:34:44,334 - We're like the fish. - Yeah. 1002 00:34:44,334 --> 00:34:47,587 - We're stuck fish. - Squirming, screaming for help, 1003 00:34:47,587 --> 00:34:49,005 but trapped. 1004 00:34:49,005 --> 00:34:50,507 - Not sick. - No. 1005 00:34:50,507 --> 00:34:51,633 - Stuck. - Just stuck. 1006 00:34:51,633 --> 00:34:53,385 - Oh, my God. - But if you stay stuck too long, 1007 00:34:53,385 --> 00:34:56,262 you're gonna get sick, and then you're gonna die. 1008 00:34:56,262 --> 00:34:59,140 I mean, maybe in some small way, the... 1009 00:35:00,141 --> 00:35:03,228 the fish lives on through us being free. 1010 00:35:03,228 --> 00:35:04,396 - Guess what? - Yeah? 1011 00:35:04,396 --> 00:35:05,772 We're getting out of that filter. 1012 00:35:05,772 --> 00:35:06,940 - Please. - Are you ready? 1013 00:35:06,940 --> 00:35:09,150 - Can you make us unstuck? - Oh, yeah. 1014 00:35:09,150 --> 00:35:10,402 So, here's the deal. 1015 00:35:16,449 --> 00:35:18,368 I've got something to tell you. 1016 00:35:21,538 --> 00:35:24,332 I got something that I gotta tell you. 1017 00:35:24,833 --> 00:35:26,084 What, Freddy? 1018 00:35:26,084 --> 00:35:27,669 It's medical. 1019 00:35:30,797 --> 00:35:32,924 It's a medical thing and it's getting worse. 1020 00:35:34,259 --> 00:35:36,011 Don't do that. 1021 00:35:36,011 --> 00:35:37,595 Freddy, your hand. 1022 00:35:37,595 --> 00:35:40,598 It's called, uh, Groat's disease. 1023 00:35:40,598 --> 00:35:42,350 I have Groat's disease. 1024 00:35:42,350 --> 00:35:43,977 It affects the nervous system 1025 00:35:43,977 --> 00:35:46,980 and eventually I become incontinent, 1026 00:35:46,980 --> 00:35:48,648 and you can't even sit. 1027 00:35:48,648 --> 00:35:51,317 The shaking is the tip of the iceberg. 1028 00:35:51,317 --> 00:35:55,780 I have to sleep on my knees, and I need 24-hour care. 1029 00:35:55,780 --> 00:35:57,282 And you'll have to hold my penis 1030 00:35:57,282 --> 00:35:59,325 - when I pee. - Ay, gevalt. 1031 00:36:02,078 --> 00:36:06,082 Okay. I-- I-- I just can't. 1032 00:36:06,082 --> 00:36:08,585 The stents and the shunts and the ports, 1033 00:36:08,585 --> 00:36:10,462 and I hear the word "hospice," I-- 1034 00:36:10,462 --> 00:36:12,047 - Yuck. - I-- I can't. 1035 00:36:12,047 --> 00:36:14,132 I'm distraught but I understand. 1036 00:36:14,132 --> 00:36:16,301 I'm so glad you do. I just-- I just-- 1037 00:36:16,301 --> 00:36:19,220 - Go live your beautiful life. - Thank you. I can't. 1038 00:36:19,220 --> 00:36:21,222 I just couldn't do it again, you know? 1039 00:36:21,222 --> 00:36:22,766 Yeah. Yeah. Okay, okay. 1040 00:36:22,766 --> 00:36:23,767 So, take off. Okay. 1041 00:36:23,767 --> 00:36:25,226 - Yeah, you should go. Yeah. - Okay. Okay. 1042 00:36:25,226 --> 00:36:26,478 - Oh, you know what? - What? 1043 00:36:26,478 --> 00:36:28,688 - I really like that scarf. - What, this? 1044 00:36:28,688 --> 00:36:30,732 Yeah, it's got a button, and it heats up, right? 1045 00:36:30,732 --> 00:36:31,608 It keeps your neck warm. 1046 00:36:31,608 --> 00:36:33,193 - You like it? - Yeah, it's nice. 1047 00:36:33,193 --> 00:36:34,944 You-- Listen. Please, take it. 1048 00:36:34,944 --> 00:36:36,154 - Please, it's the-- - Oh, please, no. 1049 00:36:36,154 --> 00:36:37,614 - No, please. It's the lea-- - Come on. 1050 00:36:37,614 --> 00:36:38,823 - You gotta charge it, but it's the least-- - What? Really? 1051 00:36:38,823 --> 00:36:40,575 - Yes. It's the least I can do. - Oh, my gosh. 1052 00:36:40,575 --> 00:36:42,994 - Oh, what a wonderful thing. - Look, you press the little button there. 1053 00:36:42,994 --> 00:36:44,579 - Yeah, that's gonna comfort you. - Oh! 1054 00:36:44,579 --> 00:36:47,832 Keep your thyroid warm, and... Oh, I feel so bad, 1055 00:36:47,832 --> 00:36:51,336 - but, uh... Okay. Oh, anal leak. - Okay, so go. Yeah, so you go. 1056 00:36:51,336 --> 00:36:52,837 - I can't do it. - Yeah, all right, go. 1057 00:36:52,837 --> 00:36:56,174 - No, don't. Don't. - I'm sorry. It's latex gloves. 1058 00:36:56,174 --> 00:36:57,801 It's secretions. 1059 00:36:57,801 --> 00:37:00,595 - It's anal leakage. - Yeah, go, go. Yeah, just go. 1060 00:37:00,595 --> 00:37:03,014 You're better off without me. I-- I'm sorry, I-- 1061 00:37:03,014 --> 00:37:05,016 - Yeah, get the hell outta here. - It's gonna be hard. 1062 00:37:05,016 --> 00:37:08,853 - Not great, what's gonna happen. - Go, go, go! Go! Please, go! Please, go! 1063 00:37:08,853 --> 00:37:13,024 Go! Go. Going. Going! 1064 00:37:13,692 --> 00:37:16,277 Gone! 1065 00:37:19,155 --> 00:37:23,451 Yeah! 1066 00:37:25,662 --> 00:37:27,539 ♪ I have A structured settlement ♪ 1067 00:37:27,539 --> 00:37:29,791 ♪ And I need cash now ♪ 1068 00:37:29,791 --> 00:37:31,876 ♪ Call J.G. Wentworth ♪ 1069 00:37:31,876 --> 00:37:37,215 ♪ 877-CASH-NOW ♪ 1070 00:37:37,215 --> 00:37:40,010 ♪ NOW, NOW ♪ 1071 00:37:40,010 --> 00:37:41,177 Ah! 1072 00:37:42,512 --> 00:37:43,763 Hello there. 1073 00:37:43,763 --> 00:37:46,975 Welcome to the most magical store at the mall. 1074 00:37:46,975 --> 00:37:48,226 Goodbye. 1075 00:37:48,226 --> 00:37:50,854 They can't order you to stop dreaming. 1076 00:37:51,354 --> 00:37:52,355 Thank you. 1077 00:37:52,355 --> 00:37:54,649 - Oh, hello, princess. - Hi, sweetheart. 1078 00:37:54,649 --> 00:37:57,736 Do you have the, um, Mickey Mouse oven gloves 1079 00:37:57,736 --> 00:37:59,404 that you put your hands in the mitts, 1080 00:37:59,404 --> 00:38:00,947 and then he's got his little hands on the-- 1081 00:38:00,947 --> 00:38:01,990 - I'm not sure. - Yeah. 1082 00:38:01,990 --> 00:38:03,616 - Do you want me to check? - Yeah, that'd be good. 1083 00:38:03,616 --> 00:38:05,785 I just left mine at my boyfriend's house. 1084 00:38:05,785 --> 00:38:08,329 We just broke up, and I don't wanna go back there. 1085 00:38:08,329 --> 00:38:10,081 - Oh. I'm so sorry to hear that. - So... 1086 00:38:10,081 --> 00:38:11,458 Well, it seems we're both the same. 1087 00:38:11,458 --> 00:38:13,501 My happily ever after has ended, too. 1088 00:38:13,501 --> 00:38:15,045 Ugh. Sucks, right? 1089 00:38:15,045 --> 00:38:16,796 - It's awful. - Yeah. Yeah. 1090 00:38:16,796 --> 00:38:18,048 Well, mine was sick. 1091 00:38:18,048 --> 00:38:20,050 Well, my Prince Charming was sick. 1092 00:38:20,050 --> 00:38:21,217 - What a small world. - Yeah. 1093 00:38:21,217 --> 00:38:23,136 - It's a small world, you know. - Yes. 1094 00:38:23,136 --> 00:38:24,387 I don't wanna go through the thing 1095 00:38:24,387 --> 00:38:26,264 with the degenerative disease he had. 1096 00:38:26,264 --> 00:38:27,640 I didn't wanna stay by. 1097 00:38:27,640 --> 00:38:29,434 I'm too young to deal with all that. 1098 00:38:29,434 --> 00:38:32,103 It's a terrible thing, this Groat's disease. 1099 00:38:32,103 --> 00:38:34,564 Wait, what? Did you say Groat's disease? 1100 00:38:34,564 --> 00:38:37,400 - Yeah. You know this? - That's what my boyfriend, Freddy, that's what he has. 1101 00:38:37,400 --> 00:38:39,235 - Groat's disease. - What? 1102 00:38:39,235 --> 00:38:40,737 - Freddy? - Yeah. 1103 00:38:40,737 --> 00:38:42,030 Freddy who? 1104 00:38:42,030 --> 00:38:43,656 Freddy Funkhouser. 1105 00:38:44,407 --> 00:38:45,992 Larry David. 1106 00:38:45,992 --> 00:38:48,328 Are you fucking kidding me? 1107 00:38:48,328 --> 00:38:49,788 - Can we get some lunch, please? - Ooh, yes. 1108 00:38:49,788 --> 00:38:51,623 - I want a sandwich or something. - Hell yeah. 1109 00:38:51,623 --> 00:38:54,000 - This is bad. - They lied to us. 1110 00:38:54,000 --> 00:38:56,086 - Oh, my God. - Jenna? 1111 00:38:56,461 --> 00:38:58,004 Oh, hey. Dana. 1112 00:38:58,004 --> 00:38:59,547 Hello. 1113 00:39:00,465 --> 00:39:02,801 You work at the Disney store? 1114 00:39:02,801 --> 00:39:04,427 Yeah, I work here. 1115 00:39:04,427 --> 00:39:07,138 Then why did you give me notes on my script? 1116 00:39:07,138 --> 00:39:08,556 'Cause Larry David asked me to. 1117 00:39:08,556 --> 00:39:12,394 I used them. I got kicked out of my writers' group. 1118 00:39:12,394 --> 00:39:14,813 - Bastards. - Larry David. 1119 00:39:15,480 --> 00:39:17,065 Larry fucking David. 1120 00:39:17,065 --> 00:39:19,484 Those fucking pricks.