1
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By Mikhel for Subtitulos.es
==SPREAD THE WORD==

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Beavis and Butt-Head S09E03
"Holy Cornholio"

3
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Tighter! Tighter!

4
00:00:17,556 --> 00:00:20,491
Look at his face.

5
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Butt-Head, I got an idea.

6
00:00:22,343 --> 00:00:23,529
Check this out.

7
00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:31,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today

8
00:00:32,661 --> 00:00:33,965
That's cool.

9
00:00:33,967 --> 00:00:35,991
Hey, you guys
shouldn't be in here,

10
00:00:35,993 --> 00:00:37,522
my dad will be mad.

11
00:00:37,524 --> 00:00:38,877
Yeah?
Well, you're too old

12
00:00:38,879 --> 00:00:40,632
to be playing
with dolls, Stewart.

13
00:00:40,634 --> 00:00:44,008
Yeah, we're doing this
for your own good.

14
00:00:44,010 --> 00:00:45,885
Just trying to help.

15
00:00:45,887 --> 00:00:48,717
Screw his butt.

16
00:00:51,644 --> 00:00:54,377
Aah! Aah! Aah!

17
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Huh-huh.

18
00:00:55,883 --> 00:00:57,432
Butt-Head! Aah! Aah!

19
00:00:57,434 --> 00:00:58,709
Huh-huh, it's in his butt.

20
00:00:58,711 --> 00:01:00,094
Aah! It hurts!

21
00:01:00,096 --> 00:01:02,460
- Uh, I wouldn't know.
- Aah!

22
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Oh, yeah.

23
00:01:04,592 --> 00:01:07,151
No, I mean the screw,
like, went into my hand.

24
00:01:07,153 --> 00:01:08,227
Come on, get it out.

25
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Oh, my God!
He's bleeding!

26
00:01:10,604 --> 00:01:12,920
Cool.

27
00:01:12,922 --> 00:01:14,747
Uh, don't worry.

28
00:01:14,749 --> 00:01:15,783
I'll fix it.

29
00:01:15,785 --> 00:01:17,893
Come on, Butt-Head, do something.

30
00:01:17,895 --> 00:01:19,256
Aah! Aah!

31
00:01:19,258 --> 00:01:21,583
Settle down, Beavis. Huh-huh.

32
00:01:23,668 --> 00:01:27,322
Uh, okay, this is gonna,
like, hurt you a lot more

33
00:01:27,324 --> 00:01:28,811
than it's gonna hurt me.

34
00:01:28,813 --> 00:01:31,312
Now, hold still, dumbass.
Huh-huh.

35
00:01:37,925 --> 00:01:39,254
Aah!

36
00:01:39,256 --> 00:01:41,930
Aah!
Cut it out, bunghole!

37
00:01:41,932 --> 00:01:43,608
Oh, my God!

38
00:01:43,610 --> 00:01:45,231
Uh, I think
this screwdriver's,

39
00:01:45,233 --> 00:01:46,238
like, broken or something.

40
00:01:46,240 --> 00:01:47,611
Oh, my God.

41
00:01:47,613 --> 00:01:49,983
Butt-Head, you've got to get
Beavis to the hospital!

42
00:01:49,985 --> 00:01:51,494
Don't worry, Beavis.

43
00:01:51,496 --> 00:01:53,577
It's not the first time
you screwed your hand.

44
00:01:53,579 --> 00:01:54,570
Huh-huh.

45
00:01:54,572 --> 00:01:56,645
Oh, yeah. Heh-heh.

46
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Aah. Ow.

47
00:01:58,744 --> 00:02:00,292
Aah.

48
00:02:00,294 --> 00:02:01,873
- Oh, no!
- Nice!

49
00:02:01,875 --> 00:02:03,799
My waiter's
a lean cuisine.

50
00:02:03,801 --> 00:02:05,551
He has a nice smile,
straight teeth.

51
00:02:05,553 --> 00:02:06,671
Perfect-o.

52
00:02:06,673 --> 00:02:08,246
Do you have phone number?
Yeah.

53
00:02:08,248 --> 00:02:10,238
Do you want me to have
your phone number?

54
00:02:11,135 --> 00:02:13,805
Those Italian dudes
are like,

55
00:02:13,807 --> 00:02:15,220
"I cannot get
Italian girls.

56
00:02:15,222 --> 00:02:16,478
"They all think
I am loser

57
00:02:16,480 --> 00:02:19,129
because I am a busboy
and I live with my mom."

58
00:02:19,131 --> 00:02:21,395
- Heh-heh.
- "Yes, but American girls

59
00:02:21,397 --> 00:02:22,317
oh, yeah, yeah."

60
00:02:22,319 --> 00:02:23,690
Heh-heh.

61
00:02:23,692 --> 00:02:25,900
I'm usually like
an easy girl.

62
00:02:25,902 --> 00:02:27,664
<i>Easy girl, okay.
Semplice.</i>

63
00:02:27,666 --> 00:02:30,196
I'm not that.

64
00:02:30,198 --> 00:02:32,870
<i>"But I have watched season 2
and 3 of Jersey shore.</i>

65
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I know this is not true."

66
00:02:34,024 --> 00:02:35,994
"Yes, you are easy,
like whore.

67
00:02:35,996 --> 00:02:37,492
This is why I'm with you."

68
00:02:37,494 --> 00:02:40,320
"You're not my first choice,
but you are the sluttiest.

69
00:02:40,322 --> 00:02:43,653
I work my way up from you
to snooki, then to jwoww."

70
00:02:43,655 --> 00:02:45,834
We'll be right here
eating popcorn

71
00:02:45,836 --> 00:02:48,987
while you guys get it in.

72
00:02:48,989 --> 00:02:50,605
I come off as,
like, a hard exterior

73
00:02:50,607 --> 00:02:53,385
and, like, I can take, like,
when the boys pick on me.

74
00:02:53,387 --> 00:02:56,357
Yeah, she has
a hard exterior.

75
00:02:56,359 --> 00:03:00,548
But deep inside she has a soft,
nasty, slutty center.

76
00:03:04,191 --> 00:03:05,938
I should never have...

77
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go!

78
00:03:06,950 --> 00:03:08,394
Go! Heh-heh.

79
00:03:08,396 --> 00:03:10,481
Get in there
and have sex with him now!

80
00:03:10,483 --> 00:03:11,376
Heh-heh.

81
00:03:11,378 --> 00:03:13,022
You're wasting all our time.

82
00:03:13,024 --> 00:03:15,904
Yeah, what tv show do you
think you're on here?

83
00:03:15,906 --> 00:03:17,950
Come on!
Heh-heh, heh-heh.

84
00:03:21,790 --> 00:03:24,046
This dude's like,
"she will not put out.

85
00:03:24,048 --> 00:03:26,052
How about I jump in bed
with you guys?"

86
00:03:27,695 --> 00:03:29,194
"I am soft like woman."

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00:03:29,196 --> 00:03:30,414
Heh-heh.

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He realized he has
to go fill water glasses.

89
00:03:39,094 --> 00:03:42,732
Uh, Beavis
screwed his hand.

90
00:03:42,734 --> 00:03:43,590
Huh-huh.

91
00:03:43,592 --> 00:03:45,475
A doll.

92
00:03:45,477 --> 00:03:47,380
Yes, he has a doll.
I see.

93
00:03:47,382 --> 00:03:49,481
Yeah.
How's it goin'?

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00:03:49,483 --> 00:03:50,936
Give me.

95
00:03:50,938 --> 00:03:52,602
No! Ow!

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00:03:52,604 --> 00:03:54,600
Aah!
Cut it out, butthole!

97
00:03:56,821 --> 00:03:58,387
Mr. Beavis?

98
00:03:58,389 --> 00:04:00,057
A doctor will see you now.

99
00:04:00,059 --> 00:04:01,205
Huh-huh.

100
00:04:04,598 --> 00:04:06,485
You might die.

101
00:04:06,487 --> 00:04:07,951
Shut up, Butt-Head.

102
00:04:11,229 --> 00:04:12,810
There's nothing
more I can do.

103
00:04:12,812 --> 00:04:14,454
I'm sorry.

104
00:04:14,456 --> 00:04:17,157
Beloved.

105
00:04:17,159 --> 00:04:19,539
Oh. Oh.

106
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Do not fear, my children.

107
00:04:22,104 --> 00:04:27,012
Soon I will transition
to a new plane.

108
00:04:27,014 --> 00:04:30,316
But first, leave me
and sister Mona alone

109
00:04:30,318 --> 00:04:33,681
so I can share
my sacred essence with her...

110
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One more time.

111
00:04:35,988 --> 00:04:37,464
Wait.

112
00:04:37,466 --> 00:04:40,332
Beloved, you said you will come
back to us in a new vessel.

113
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How will we know you
on your return?

114
00:04:49,082 --> 00:04:51,442
So, like, uh...

115
00:04:51,444 --> 00:04:53,498
Is this where
the screw penetrated

116
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the action figure's butt?

117
00:04:55,800 --> 00:04:58,217
- Uh, yes.
- Huh-huh.

118
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I believe that is where the
screw made its point of entry.

119
00:05:00,579 --> 00:05:03,337
Yeah, huh-huh.

120
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"Entry."

121
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Here's the thing.

122
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I won't be able to remove it
by simple extraction

123
00:05:08,599 --> 00:05:11,495
without further damaging
the surrounding soft tissues.

124
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That's what happens
when Beavis screws his hand.

125
00:05:14,211 --> 00:05:15,499
Oh, yeah, yeah.

126
00:05:15,501 --> 00:05:17,881
"Tissues."

127
00:05:17,883 --> 00:05:20,621
- Uh, do you need to be here?
- Ow.

128
00:05:20,623 --> 00:05:22,227
Uh, yeah.

129
00:05:22,229 --> 00:05:25,115
- Okay.
- Heh-heh. Ow.

130
00:05:25,117 --> 00:05:27,034
- Huh-huh.
- Damn it.

131
00:05:28,393 --> 00:05:29,600
- Leave these on for a week.
- Mm-hmm.

132
00:05:29,602 --> 00:05:30,907
I'm gonna let
your friend hold these for you.

133
00:05:31,623 --> 00:05:33,025
These will help
manage the pain.

134
00:05:33,027 --> 00:05:34,935
You should take one,
three to four times daily.

135
00:05:34,937 --> 00:05:35,921
- Okay?
- Yeah, okay.

136
00:05:35,923 --> 00:05:37,283
But no more than that.

137
00:05:37,285 --> 00:05:39,683
Sometimes these
can cause hyperactivity,

138
00:05:39,685 --> 00:05:42,425
especially
in younger people, okay?

139
00:05:42,427 --> 00:05:43,932
Take care, boys.

140
00:05:43,934 --> 00:05:46,225
- Cool.
- Huh-huh.

141
00:05:46,227 --> 00:05:48,195
Uh, how many did he say?

142
00:05:48,197 --> 00:05:51,205
Come on, Butt-Head, give me
my painkiller vitamin things.

143
00:05:51,207 --> 00:05:53,213
- Huh-huh.
- Butthole.

144
00:05:54,367 --> 00:05:56,380
Ahh.

145
00:05:56,382 --> 00:05:57,839
That's better.
Not bad.

146
00:05:57,841 --> 00:05:59,958
A little bitter, but...

147
00:06:02,478 --> 00:06:05,837
Whoa, hospitals are cool.

148
00:06:07,510 --> 00:06:09,648
We should just,
like, hang out here.

149
00:06:09,650 --> 00:06:10,949
Huh-huh.

150
00:06:17,690 --> 00:06:20,913
Settle down, Beavis.

151
00:06:22,118 --> 00:06:23,707
He's so beautiful.

152
00:06:23,709 --> 00:06:25,663
What are you guys
gonna name him?

153
00:06:25,665 --> 00:06:28,019
Well, we've always
liked the name Theo.

154
00:06:28,021 --> 00:06:29,046
I am Cornholio!

155
00:06:29,048 --> 00:06:31,470
You will name
your baby Bungholio!

156
00:06:31,472 --> 00:06:33,508
Heh-heh. Yeah.
Is he an albino?

157
00:06:35,576 --> 00:06:37,568
Julio Bungholio!
Heh-heh.

158
00:06:37,570 --> 00:06:40,815
He will be an albino
and a gringo!

159
00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:43,910
Uh, are you gonna feed him
with your boob?

160
00:06:43,912 --> 00:06:45,120
Huh-huh.

161
00:06:45,122 --> 00:06:46,662
That would be cool.

162
00:06:46,664 --> 00:06:48,651
Huh-huh.

163
00:06:50,565 --> 00:06:51,575
Heh-heh.

164
00:06:51,577 --> 00:06:53,152
Is that guy dead,

165
00:06:53,154 --> 00:06:55,067
or is he just,
like, sleeping?

166
00:06:55,069 --> 00:06:56,746
I don't know,
but either way it's cool.

167
00:06:56,748 --> 00:06:57,960
Yeah.

168
00:07:00,951 --> 00:07:04,229
* It's so cold in the "D" *

169
00:07:04,231 --> 00:07:08,067
* how the fuck do
we supposed to keep peace? *

170
00:07:08,069 --> 00:07:11,749
<i>uh, is this
Real Housewives of Detroit?</i>

171
00:07:11,751 --> 00:07:13,412
Heh-heh.

172
00:07:13,414 --> 00:07:16,976
* It's so cold in the "D" *

173
00:07:16,978 --> 00:07:20,252
* how the fuck do
we supposed to keep peace? *

174
00:07:20,254 --> 00:07:22,914
uh, I think that chick
in the back is dancing

175
00:07:22,916 --> 00:07:24,193
to a different song.

176
00:07:24,195 --> 00:07:25,771
- Huh-huh.
- Yeah. Heh-heh.

177
00:07:25,773 --> 00:07:30,226
* I'm having visions of how
we used to hang and bang *

178
00:07:30,228 --> 00:07:32,946
hanging and banging.

179
00:07:32,948 --> 00:07:35,232
* It's bad
for your health *

180
00:07:37,197 --> 00:07:39,696
- Yeah, stackin' papers, yeah.
- Heh-heh.

181
00:07:39,698 --> 00:07:42,768
* It's hard in the "D" when
you're tryin' to keep peace *

182
00:07:42,770 --> 00:07:44,951
I'm lost.

183
00:07:44,953 --> 00:07:46,376
* You don't have to worry
about those fancy shits *

184
00:07:46,378 --> 00:07:49,833
* tryin' to throw taxes at you,
giving you stress *

185
00:07:49,835 --> 00:07:51,467
* it's so cold in the "D" *

186
00:07:51,469 --> 00:07:54,465
Ba-bum-bum.

187
00:07:54,467 --> 00:07:57,808
* It's so cold in the "D" *
huh-huh.

188
00:07:57,810 --> 00:08:01,559
Uh, this is hard
to dance to.

189
00:08:01,561 --> 00:08:04,364
* All the real niggas gone,
and the worms are left *

190
00:08:04,366 --> 00:08:07,230
* it's so cold in the "D" *

191
00:08:07,232 --> 00:08:10,247
* how the fuck do
we supposed to keep peace? *

192
00:08:10,249 --> 00:08:13,134
* what's all
on a fucked up mind *

193
00:08:13,136 --> 00:08:14,487
something's off.

194
00:08:14,489 --> 00:08:16,244
* Workin' and doing time *

195
00:08:16,246 --> 00:08:17,772
* it's so cold... *

196
00:08:17,774 --> 00:08:19,977
<i>I think she
was in Lion King.</i>

197
00:08:19,979 --> 00:08:21,321
Huh-huh.

198
00:08:21,323 --> 00:08:22,700
Oh, yeah, yeah.

199
00:08:22,702 --> 00:08:24,978
Yeah, I like her better
in this, though, you know?

200
00:08:24,980 --> 00:08:25,994
Heh-heh.

201
00:08:25,996 --> 00:08:27,648
Yeah.

202
00:08:27,650 --> 00:08:29,282
This rules.

203
00:08:29,284 --> 00:08:31,093
Huh-huh.

204
00:08:32,921 --> 00:08:34,770
* It's so cold in the "D" *

205
00:08:38,703 --> 00:08:41,245
why would the beloved
have health insurance?

206
00:08:41,247 --> 00:08:43,101
He is the light,
the leader.

207
00:08:43,103 --> 00:08:45,640
Beloved?
You mean Myron Turtlebaum?

208
00:08:45,642 --> 00:08:48,017
Yes, now, why would the
beloved need health insurance,

209
00:08:48,019 --> 00:08:49,985
since he is the essence
of all that is healthy and pure?

210
00:08:49,987 --> 00:08:52,127
Well, "the essence" didn't
have any health insurance.

211
00:08:52,129 --> 00:08:53,452
- I am Cornholio!
- So I'm gonna...

212
00:08:53,454 --> 00:08:54,818
I have polio
in my bunghole!

213
00:08:54,820 --> 00:08:55,979
Heh-heh.
Yeah!

214
00:08:55,981 --> 00:08:59,360
This is cool.

215
00:08:59,362 --> 00:09:01,351
Interesting.

216
00:09:01,353 --> 00:09:02,544
He speaks in tongues,

217
00:09:02,546 --> 00:09:04,900
just as the beloved said
he would on his return.

218
00:09:04,902 --> 00:09:07,950
Is it possible?

219
00:09:09,864 --> 00:09:11,030
Excuse me,
young brother.

220
00:09:11,032 --> 00:09:12,551
May we ask you
a question?

221
00:09:12,553 --> 00:09:13,584
Are you threatening me?

222
00:09:13,586 --> 00:09:15,492
My bunghole
will ask the questions!

223
00:09:15,494 --> 00:09:16,661
Heh-heh.

224
00:09:16,663 --> 00:09:18,091
Why do I not use T.P.
For my pee-pee?

225
00:09:18,093 --> 00:09:19,418
Heh-heh.

226
00:09:19,420 --> 00:09:21,613
The beloved always
did like riddles.

227
00:09:21,615 --> 00:09:23,275
You will belove
my bunghole!

228
00:09:23,277 --> 00:09:24,276
Heh-heh.

229
00:09:24,278 --> 00:09:25,851
For I am
the great Cornholio.

230
00:09:25,853 --> 00:09:27,464
I need T.P.
For my bunghole.

231
00:09:27,466 --> 00:09:30,678
Look, his hands.

232
00:09:30,680 --> 00:09:32,476
He has the stigmata!

233
00:09:32,478 --> 00:09:35,427
Stigma-ta-ta-ta
from lake titicaca!

234
00:09:35,429 --> 00:09:37,887
The markings
the beloved also spoke of.

235
00:09:37,889 --> 00:09:39,984
He is the one,
the new messiah!

236
00:09:39,986 --> 00:09:41,450
Would you like some caca?

237
00:09:41,452 --> 00:09:43,387
I am the beloved bunghole!

238
00:09:45,519 --> 00:09:46,916
This is cool.

239
00:09:46,918 --> 00:09:49,030
Huh-huh.

240
00:09:52,672 --> 00:09:54,924
Eh, check it out.

241
00:09:54,926 --> 00:09:56,837
An Indian.

242
00:09:56,839 --> 00:09:59,577
You know, um,
something I always wondered

243
00:09:59,579 --> 00:10:00,512
about Indians.

244
00:10:00,514 --> 00:10:03,267
Are they Mexicans?

245
00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:05,274
- Eh, Beavis?
- Yeah.

246
00:10:05,276 --> 00:10:08,255
Remember you asked that
question in social studies

247
00:10:08,257 --> 00:10:10,773
and the teacher sent you
to the principal's office?

248
00:10:10,775 --> 00:10:12,751
Oh, yeah, yeah.

249
00:10:12,753 --> 00:10:13,972
And the principal
didn't know either.

250
00:10:13,974 --> 00:10:15,777
Heh-heh.

251
00:10:15,779 --> 00:10:19,442
Eh, you know, until they
started setting stuff on fire

252
00:10:19,444 --> 00:10:20,784
and breaking stuff

253
00:10:20,786 --> 00:10:23,261
I thought this was
that J.C. Penney

254
00:10:23,263 --> 00:10:25,450
back to school commercial.

255
00:10:25,452 --> 00:10:28,700
Yeah, yeah, this is cool,
yeah. Heh-heh.

256
00:10:28,702 --> 00:10:32,947
Eh, did you know that Indians
use every part of the firework?

257
00:10:32,949 --> 00:10:34,410
Whoa, really?

258
00:10:34,412 --> 00:10:35,657
Heh-heh.

259
00:10:35,659 --> 00:10:37,973
- Nothing goes to waste.
- Huh-huh.

260
00:10:37,975 --> 00:10:40,883
Yeah, cool, yeah.

261
00:10:40,885 --> 00:10:43,463
Boy, you don't
want to park

262
00:10:43,465 --> 00:10:45,336
in the cage the elephant's
parking lot.

263
00:10:45,338 --> 00:10:47,815
- Yeah, really.
- Heh-heh.

264
00:10:47,817 --> 00:10:49,956
Cage the elephant is not
responsible for any damage

265
00:10:49,958 --> 00:10:51,425
done to your vehicle.

266
00:10:51,427 --> 00:10:52,758
Heh-heh.

267
00:10:52,760 --> 00:10:55,961
Eh, do you know what
"cage the elephant" means?

268
00:10:55,963 --> 00:10:57,462
Oh, yeah, yeah.

269
00:10:57,464 --> 00:11:01,409
Is that like, um,
choking your chicken?

270
00:11:01,411 --> 00:11:04,985
Beavis, you think
everything means that.

271
00:11:04,987 --> 00:11:08,831
But, eh,
in this case it does.

272
00:11:11,147 --> 00:11:14,333
Whoa, that guy just
caged his elephant.

273
00:11:14,335 --> 00:11:15,786
Heh-heh.

274
00:11:22,272 --> 00:11:24,565
No man should
be without T.P.,

275
00:11:24,567 --> 00:11:26,641
for there is
but one bunghole...

276
00:11:26,707 --> 00:11:29,640
the almighty Bungholio!

277
00:11:29,642 --> 00:11:31,874
The beloved is trying
to tell us something,

278
00:11:31,876 --> 00:11:33,920
but I do not understand
his message.

279
00:11:33,922 --> 00:11:36,713
Mm, he's clearly channeling
a higher source.

280
00:11:36,715 --> 00:11:38,304
We must bring him
back to the temple

281
00:11:38,306 --> 00:11:40,535
so others can help interpret
his meaning.

282
00:11:42,067 --> 00:11:44,309
Thank you, beloved,
for not making us wait long

283
00:11:44,311 --> 00:11:45,690
for your return.

284
00:11:45,692 --> 00:11:48,221
Let us take you back now
to our community.

285
00:11:48,223 --> 00:11:49,696
There are
many people there

286
00:11:49,698 --> 00:11:53,114
who will be happy
to receive your message.

287
00:11:53,116 --> 00:11:55,463
- Hey, baby.
- Huh-huh.

288
00:11:55,465 --> 00:11:57,452
Want to receive my message?

289
00:11:59,658 --> 00:12:01,271
Good news,
brother oontar.

290
00:12:01,273 --> 00:12:03,166
The beloved
has already returned.

291
00:12:03,168 --> 00:12:05,536
And brought
with him a prophet.

292
00:12:05,538 --> 00:12:07,454
Exalt the beloved.

293
00:12:07,456 --> 00:12:08,534
Hey, guys.

294
00:12:08,536 --> 00:12:10,592
I came to see
how Beavis was doing.

295
00:12:10,594 --> 00:12:12,833
- Get out of here, Stewart.
- Huh-huh.

296
00:12:12,835 --> 00:12:15,344
We're, like, prophets.
Huh-huh.

297
00:12:15,346 --> 00:12:16,802
Where are you guys going?

298
00:12:16,804 --> 00:12:20,122
Uh, these people want us
to, like, get in their van.

299
00:12:20,124 --> 00:12:22,666
And there's chicks.
Huh-huh.

300
00:12:22,668 --> 00:12:25,655
So why don't you just
move along, Stewart?

301
00:12:25,657 --> 00:12:27,223
That sounds like
a bad idea, Butt-Head.

302
00:12:27,225 --> 00:12:29,823
Remember, stranger danger.

303
00:12:29,825 --> 00:12:31,759
Brother Butt-Head, would you
like to bring your friend?

304
00:12:31,761 --> 00:12:33,768
- Uh, no.
- Huh-huh.

305
00:12:33,770 --> 00:12:35,466
He wouldn't fit in.

306
00:12:35,468 --> 00:12:38,969
Huh-huh. Huh-huh.

307
00:12:46,822 --> 00:12:49,088
I'm thinking about
getting boob implants.

308
00:12:49,090 --> 00:12:50,503
Oh, my gosh.

309
00:12:50,505 --> 00:12:51,893
And so I'm kind of excited.

310
00:12:51,895 --> 00:12:54,790
This chick talks
through the back of her nose.

311
00:12:54,792 --> 00:12:57,889
Heh-heh, yeah,
her mom does too.

312
00:12:57,891 --> 00:12:59,429
I make sure that
I have my bills paid.

313
00:12:59,431 --> 00:13:00,647
We have food to eat.

314
00:13:00,649 --> 00:13:02,757
I deserve to, at least,
treat myself.

315
00:13:02,759 --> 00:13:04,876
"I deserve to,
at least, treat myself."

316
00:13:04,878 --> 00:13:06,235
Huh-huh.

317
00:13:06,237 --> 00:13:07,574
Doesn't that cost
a lot of money?

318
00:13:07,576 --> 00:13:09,793
"Doesn't that
cost a lot of money?"

319
00:13:09,795 --> 00:13:10,848
Heh-heh. Heh-heh.

320
00:13:10,850 --> 00:13:12,230
I'm gonna need your help

321
00:13:12,232 --> 00:13:13,737
'cause I can't, you know,
lift Sophia.

322
00:13:13,739 --> 00:13:15,146
So I'm gonna take
some time off.

323
00:13:15,148 --> 00:13:16,820
While I meet with
the plastic surgeon...

324
00:13:16,822 --> 00:13:20,402
Heh-heh. Great,
he has a moustache.

325
00:13:21,763 --> 00:13:23,674
Okay, now, just go ahead
and arch your back for me

326
00:13:23,676 --> 00:13:26,163
a little bit there,
yeah, yeah... heh-heh.

327
00:13:26,165 --> 00:13:27,860
Let me just go ahead
and take these home

328
00:13:27,862 --> 00:13:29,029
and load 'em
into my computer.

329
00:13:29,031 --> 00:13:32,268
Yeah, notify all the guys.

330
00:13:32,270 --> 00:13:33,706
As far as fees,

331
00:13:33,708 --> 00:13:36,799
saline implants are $1,000
cheaper than the silicone.

332
00:13:36,801 --> 00:13:39,472
The doctor said you gotta
spend money to make money.

333
00:13:39,474 --> 00:13:40,759
Heh-heh.

334
00:13:40,761 --> 00:13:42,477
I was just calling you
because I just got my loan

335
00:13:42,479 --> 00:13:43,890
for the breast augmentation.

336
00:13:43,892 --> 00:13:46,468
"I just got my loan
for the breast augmentation."

337
00:13:48,762 --> 00:13:50,728
You can get a loan
for big boobs?!

338
00:13:50,730 --> 00:13:53,722
Eh...Wow.

339
00:13:53,724 --> 00:13:55,384
Yeah, I'm gonna
take out a loan

340
00:13:55,386 --> 00:13:56,836
to get a bigger schlong,
yeah.

341
00:13:58,298 --> 00:14:00,654
While you were at school,
I called up our lawyer...

342
00:14:00,656 --> 00:14:03,188
She's like,
"mom, all I want from you

343
00:14:03,190 --> 00:14:06,015
"is to shut up
and take care of my baby

344
00:14:06,017 --> 00:14:08,276
and get me my new boobs!"

345
00:14:08,278 --> 00:14:11,539
But it isn't anybody's
business unless I die.

346
00:14:11,541 --> 00:14:13,324
"I don't think
it's anybody's business

347
00:14:13,326 --> 00:14:15,257
unless I die."

348
00:14:15,259 --> 00:14:18,125
And I will never die!
For I am teen mom!

349
00:14:18,127 --> 00:14:19,873
- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.

350
00:14:19,875 --> 00:14:21,084
- Welcome. Are you ready?
- Uh-huh.

351
00:14:21,086 --> 00:14:23,382
Okay, and this is where
you sign your life away.

352
00:14:23,384 --> 00:14:25,143
Okay, where do I sign?

353
00:14:25,145 --> 00:14:26,333
Heh-heh.

354
00:14:26,335 --> 00:14:29,256
Breast augmentation.
Heh-heh.

355
00:14:35,897 --> 00:14:37,106
- He's here!
- He's here!

356
00:14:40,062 --> 00:14:42,119
Are you threatening me?

357
00:14:42,121 --> 00:14:46,117
You must all bow down
to the almighty Cornholio!

358
00:14:46,119 --> 00:14:48,025
Heh-heh.
Now!

359
00:14:49,613 --> 00:14:52,278
- Huh-huh.
- Heh-heh.

360
00:14:52,280 --> 00:14:54,542
Why does he
refer to himself

361
00:14:54,544 --> 00:14:57,796
as both Cornholio
and the almighty bunghole?

362
00:14:57,798 --> 00:14:59,283
It is the duality
of nature

363
00:14:59,285 --> 00:15:01,576
that only the beloved
can fully understand.

364
00:15:04,053 --> 00:15:07,974
You are all bungholes...
each and every one of you!

365
00:15:07,976 --> 00:15:10,284
And now I must go,

366
00:15:10,286 --> 00:15:12,556
for I am
the great Cornholio!

367
00:15:12,558 --> 00:15:15,448
I need T.P.
For my bunghole.

368
00:15:18,822 --> 00:15:21,781
Bring me your T.P.!

369
00:15:21,783 --> 00:15:23,315
All your T.P.!

370
00:15:23,317 --> 00:15:26,644
You do not want to face
the wrath of my bunghole!

371
00:15:26,646 --> 00:15:27,986
Heh-heh.

372
00:15:27,988 --> 00:15:30,913
There must be more T.P.!
More T.P.! More T.P.!

373
00:15:30,915 --> 00:15:33,282
Now!

374
00:15:40,659 --> 00:15:42,126
Repeat after me!

375
00:15:42,128 --> 00:15:43,730
I am the great Cornholio!

376
00:15:43,732 --> 00:15:45,699
I need T.P.
For my bunghole!

377
00:15:45,701 --> 00:15:48,384
I am the great Cornholio.

378
00:15:48,386 --> 00:15:52,143
I need T.P.
For my bunghole.

379
00:15:52,145 --> 00:15:54,317
Uh, so, like,

380
00:15:54,319 --> 00:15:56,083
want to share our essence?

381
00:15:56,085 --> 00:15:58,261
Huh-huh.
I'm a prophet.

382
00:15:58,263 --> 00:15:59,268
Huh-huh.

383
00:15:59,270 --> 00:16:02,769
It is not time.

384
00:16:02,771 --> 00:16:03,640
Ugh.

385
00:16:03,642 --> 00:16:06,019
This place
is starting to suck.

386
00:16:06,021 --> 00:16:07,331
Huh-huh.

387
00:16:07,333 --> 00:16:08,611
It is troubling.

388
00:16:08,613 --> 00:16:11,320
We have spent all our savings
on toilet paper,

389
00:16:11,322 --> 00:16:13,950
and yet the beloved
still seems unsatisfied.

390
00:16:13,952 --> 00:16:16,460
He was very angry
we could not get him more pills.

391
00:16:16,462 --> 00:16:19,695
Hmm, he clearly needs
to cleanse himself of toxins

392
00:16:19,697 --> 00:16:21,706
he absorbed
in the great infinity.

393
00:16:21,708 --> 00:16:24,033
We will have the festival
of rebirth tonight.

394
00:16:24,035 --> 00:16:26,840
And tomorrow, we will
have 'The Great Conception'.

395
00:16:26,842 --> 00:16:28,220
Gather all the young women

396
00:16:28,222 --> 00:16:30,049
and tell them
to prepare their bodies

397
00:16:30,051 --> 00:16:32,080
for his sacred essence.

398
00:16:33,865 --> 00:16:36,070
And get him
more of those pills.

399
00:16:37,466 --> 00:16:39,522
The almighty Bungholio!

400
00:16:39,524 --> 00:16:41,855
Bungholio!

401
00:16:41,857 --> 00:16:43,518
I am an albino!

402
00:16:43,520 --> 00:16:46,714
I am an albino!

403
00:16:46,716 --> 00:16:48,711
I have no bunghole!

404
00:16:48,713 --> 00:16:51,615
I have no bunghole!

405
00:16:51,617 --> 00:16:54,557
You will now make an offering
to the almighty bunghole!

406
00:16:55,559 --> 00:16:59,222
For I have an albino
in my bunghole.

407
00:16:59,224 --> 00:17:00,224
Heh-heh.

408
00:17:00,329 --> 00:17:02,750
You must now
offer the, um...

409
00:17:02,752 --> 00:17:05,309
must, um, heh... bunghole.

410
00:17:05,311 --> 00:17:06,652
Heh.

411
00:17:06,654 --> 00:17:08,170
Eh, I'm tired.

412
00:17:08,172 --> 00:17:11,635
Yeah. Heh-heh. Ow.

413
00:17:11,637 --> 00:17:13,672
Let's get
out of here, Beavis.

414
00:17:15,365 --> 00:17:16,878
All these chicks want to do
is talk

415
00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:19,198
about spiritual blessings
and stuff.

416
00:17:19,200 --> 00:17:20,762
We're never gonna score here.

417
00:17:20,764 --> 00:17:22,500
Yeah, yeah.
My hands hurt.

418
00:17:23,842 --> 00:17:25,725
Cornholio, prophet Butt-Head.

419
00:17:26,466 --> 00:17:29,964
Tomorrow we will engage
in 'The Great Conception'.

420
00:17:29,966 --> 00:17:31,597
- Uh, the great what?
- Huh-huh.

421
00:17:31,599 --> 00:17:34,394
- Contraption? What?
- Heh-heh.

422
00:17:34,396 --> 00:17:37,475
Yes, tonight the vessels
must prepare themselves

423
00:17:37,477 --> 00:17:39,174
to receive your essence.

424
00:17:39,176 --> 00:17:40,693
- Yeah, yeah.
- There will be a...

425
00:17:40,695 --> 00:17:42,739
blah, blah, essence
in the vessels in the...

426
00:17:42,741 --> 00:17:44,567
blagh, let's
get out of here, Beavis.

427
00:17:46,434 --> 00:17:49,255
Perhaps it's good that
they rest up for tomorrow.

428
00:17:49,257 --> 00:17:52,657
Yes.

429
00:17:54,716 --> 00:17:57,092
It is very good
that the beloved

430
00:17:57,094 --> 00:17:59,973
and prophet Butt-Head
are so young.

431
00:17:59,975 --> 00:18:03,858
They must have great energy
to make love to us all tomorrow.

432
00:18:07,172 --> 00:18:10,652
- Huh-huh. This place sucks.
- Yeah. Heh-heh.

433
00:18:11,495 --> 00:18:13,561
"Teen Mom"

434
00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:18,467
<i>Eh, is this the Teen Mom where
she gets her boob operation?</i>

435
00:18:18,469 --> 00:18:21,151
- Yeah, cool.
- Heh-heh.

436
00:18:21,153 --> 00:18:23,047
Now let's see how
these things turned out.

437
00:18:23,049 --> 00:18:25,012
Breast augmentation.

438
00:18:25,014 --> 00:18:26,914
Heh-heh.

439
00:18:26,916 --> 00:18:28,463
I'm afraid we've lost her.

440
00:18:28,465 --> 00:18:30,807
Don't worry.
Here boobs are fine.

441
00:18:30,809 --> 00:18:33,186
So no refunds.

442
00:18:33,188 --> 00:18:35,192
Heh-heh.

443
00:18:35,194 --> 00:18:36,700
Lookin' good.

444
00:18:36,702 --> 00:18:38,560
Did her dad just say
"looking good"?

445
00:18:38,562 --> 00:18:41,611
Yeah, nice boobs, honey.

446
00:18:41,613 --> 00:18:42,742
Heh-heh.

447
00:18:42,744 --> 00:18:45,233
Come on,
get down those stairs.

448
00:18:45,235 --> 00:18:47,163
They didn't give you
fake legs.

449
00:18:47,165 --> 00:18:48,723
Yeah. Huh-huh.

450
00:18:48,725 --> 00:18:51,160
You didn't walk this slow
after you had the baby.

451
00:18:51,162 --> 00:18:53,307
Heh-heh.

452
00:18:53,309 --> 00:18:55,097
It's okay, honey.

453
00:18:55,099 --> 00:18:56,392
It's okay.

454
00:18:56,394 --> 00:18:57,951
Now, I know the baby
is bumming you out.

455
00:18:57,953 --> 00:18:59,228
Don't worry.
I'll get rid of her.

456
00:18:59,230 --> 00:19:01,673
Heh-heh.

457
00:19:01,675 --> 00:19:03,211
Not on my arm!

458
00:19:03,213 --> 00:19:05,557
Not on my arms, dad.
On my boobs!

459
00:19:05,559 --> 00:19:08,569
Huh-huh. Dumbass.

460
00:19:08,571 --> 00:19:09,966
Yeah, really. Heh-heh.

461
00:19:09,968 --> 00:19:11,848
She's like,
"don't feed those to the baby.

462
00:19:11,850 --> 00:19:13,056
I need 'em for my boobs."

463
00:19:13,058 --> 00:19:15,607
And bring the frozen
tater tots, too,

464
00:19:15,609 --> 00:19:16,595
before she eats those!

465
00:19:16,597 --> 00:19:18,807
Yeah. Ow. Heh-heh.

466
00:19:18,809 --> 00:19:21,787
- That beloved place sucked.
- Huh-huh.

467
00:19:21,789 --> 00:19:23,027
There were, like,
all these chicks

468
00:19:23,029 --> 00:19:24,283
following us around,

469
00:19:24,285 --> 00:19:25,533
but then they didn't want
to do anything.

470
00:19:25,535 --> 00:19:26,689
- Yeah.
- Huh-huh.

471
00:19:26,691 --> 00:19:28,216
- Yeah, that sucked.
- Huh-huh.

472
00:19:28,218 --> 00:19:30,693
Now I can't even spank
my monkey.

473
00:19:30,695 --> 00:19:32,045
Heh-heh.

474
00:19:36,868 --> 00:19:38,554
Aah! Ow!

475
00:19:38,556 --> 00:19:40,304
Beavis, are
you all right?

476
00:19:40,306 --> 00:19:42,513
Did those people...
Touch you?

477
00:19:42,515 --> 00:19:44,305
No.

478
00:19:44,307 --> 00:19:45,852
Oh, good.

479
00:19:45,854 --> 00:19:48,312
Well, my dad wanted you
to sign these papers

480
00:19:48,314 --> 00:19:49,909
saying
you're not gonna sue us.

481
00:19:49,911 --> 00:19:51,386
Cornholio!

482
00:19:51,388 --> 00:19:54,390
We need you to return
for 'The Great Conception'.

483
00:19:54,392 --> 00:19:57,193
I'm, like, busy.

484
00:19:57,195 --> 00:19:58,170
Go away.

485
00:19:58,172 --> 00:19:59,738
We don't understand.

486
00:19:59,740 --> 00:20:01,433
Wasn't the beloved
reincarnated in you

487
00:20:01,435 --> 00:20:02,695
to tell us what to do?

488
00:20:02,697 --> 00:20:04,344
Is this not
what you want?

489
00:20:04,346 --> 00:20:06,685
He's the beloved now.

490
00:20:06,687 --> 00:20:08,372
Go bother him.

491
00:20:08,374 --> 00:20:10,698
Get out of here.

492
00:20:13,063 --> 00:20:14,689
Where are
you taking me?

493
00:20:14,691 --> 00:20:16,591
To 'The Great Conception'.

494
00:20:16,593 --> 00:20:17,762
Conception?

495
00:20:17,764 --> 00:20:19,942
Doesn't that mean
something with sex?

496
00:20:19,944 --> 00:20:22,182
Yes.

497
00:20:22,184 --> 00:20:25,046
All right!

498
00:20:25,048 --> 00:20:27,764
What a dumbass.

499
00:20:27,766 --> 00:20:30,791
Huh-huh.
He thinks he's gonna score.

500
00:20:30,793 --> 00:20:33,487
- Heh-heh.
- Really, what a dumbass.

501
00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:40,604
Yay, sex!

502
00:20:40,605 --> 00:20:43,271
By Mikhel for Subtitulos.es
==SPREAD THE WORD==

503
00:20:44,305 --> 00:21:44,272
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