THE CRUSH
And it now appears that the explosion not only killed everyone inside the building...
Toxic debris from the blast may have settled in the reservoir
poisoning the entire county's water supply.
No, that's not it. Change it.
And the authorities said
there simply hasn't been a bridge disaster like this in all of human history.
As many as two dozen vehicles
were sent plunging into the icy depths.
And we've just received word that the list may include a busload
- That isn't it. - of missionaries...
And we can now confirm
that the roof collapse here at the MegaDome has trapped
all fifty thousand sport fans within.
These are simply folk like you and me
who bargained for nothing more than an afternoon of tractor pull excitement.
- That's it. That's it. - How many of those
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - innocent fans survived,
if any, may not be known for hours or even days.
But the carnage, the tragedy, the heartbreak,
the misery, the sorrow, the waste,
the human suffering are incomprehensible...
It's hammer time.
You can't touch this.
Can't touch this.
Touch this!
I can't touch this.
I can't watch this.
This is stupid.
And it sucks, too.
Look at these special effects.
These special effects suck.
You have to spit when you talk, Beavis?
I always try to hock a loogie when I talk.
You just spit in my eye, assmunch.
- Is this Pat Nebatar? - Yeah.
She's that chick that had sexual intercourse with Dan Henley.
Goodbye to you.
Goodbye to glue!
Goodbye to poo!
"Call now for live one-on-one conversations".
"Share your intimate thoughts!"
"$ 1.95 per minute".
"Must be 18 or older".
Hey Beavis, if we had a dollar and 95
we could call and share our intimate thoughts.
We could tell her that she sucks.
This chick's name is...
T'Pau.
Yeah. That's Spanish for "this sucks".
He's dressed up like that dude on the dollar.
You got what I need
but you say he's just a friend
- I'm pretty cool. - Oh, baby! You...
got what I need...
Amadeus Markie.
What?
Hey Beavis...
I'm gonna get me one of those gold chains to put around my neck.
- Me too. - I would look pretty cool huh?
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These nachos are good.
Nachos rule.
Hey Butt-Head... check it out.
Cool.
Where's the preschoolers at
who parked their sucky little trikes in my space?
lf my arm wasn't so sore from my new tattoo,
l'd smear both your asses all over the parking lot.
Cool.
Give me your cherry Fruity Whips and those nachos
and l might not shove these handlebars up your butt.
Okay.
Todd's cool!
l think he likes us.
Yeah. Let's go hang with him.
Hi, excuse me.
We're playing over on the courts there
and the music is kind of getting in the way of our concentration.
- Any chance of getting it turned down? - No.
Yeah, l was just wondering, because l really dont see why you can't
enjoy your rock music at a slightly lower volume.
All right, thanks a bunch. Have a real nice day, okay?
Why didn't Todd kick that guy's ass?
He's gonna kick his ass later when his girlfriend's watching.
Hey, it's those punks from Qwik-Mart.
Kindergarten get out early today, girls?
That's pretty funny.
What do you fuzz-nuts want?
We came down, 'cause...
We want to hang with you.
Can we join your gang?
Sure you can join, man...
But you gotta take the entrance exam first. Are you ready?
Hey Slade, let's help them cram for the exam.
No way.
You guys ready for the exam?
l guess so.
You guys don't seem too excited. You pumped?
All right, then. lt's exam time.
That's cool!
This chick has a good attitude.
That guy has bigger boobs than she does.
- Maybe we should touch them. - It's a dude, Beavis!
Oh yeah.
I forgot.
He does have big boobs, though.
Those are some dudes holding their rods.
That's pretty cool.
She should put her address on the screen
so we know where to go, so we can touch her.
Why would you need a "dress"?
- You're some kind of... transformer? - No, Beavis. Not a dress. An address!
You're stupid, Beavis.
Well girls, me and Slade's been talking
and we just dont think you're quite ready to join the gang, man.
l really wanted to take you, but Slade said no, man. Sorry.
But if you guys want to try again
come back to the park next week. And bring some gas money next time.
l knew he liked us.
Todd's cool.
She wants something...
Is that Dianne Reeves?
Yeah!
Depeche Mode is French for "We are wussies".
Yeah.
I feel you...
Don't feel me, dude.
You can see parts of her thingies.
This is the morning of our love!
- Yes! - Yes!
Yes! Yes!
No! No! Show the chick!
- Yes! - Yes!
No! No! No, this sucks!
He's looking at you, Beavis.
He wants you.
No way!
Tattoos are pretty cool.
For a wussy.
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