CUSTOMERS SUCK
"Here's the story of a lovely lady".
- Whoa check it out, "The Bunch". - "Who was bringing up three very
lovely girls. All of them had hair of gold,
like their mother. The youngest one in curls".
"Here's the story, of a man named Brady".
- "The Bunch" sucks. - Yeah.
I don't like stuff that sucks.
Let's watch something cool.
She is beating her carpet.
Yeah, we should do that.
It looks cool.
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You're white?
He's got a hair stiffy.
Old people.
You're wrong?
Yeah, he is all wrong.
And his hair is orange.
You think those guys sleep in separate beds?
No way.
Why are these guys so snotty?
- Yeah, they look all pissed off. - Yeah, and tired.
What's that guy doing back there?
He's Wang Chung'ing.
That guy is peeing.
That's cool. I peed in the gym once.
Really?
You're pretty cool, Beavis.
Where are the women in this video?
Yeah, they need some chicks too.
Hey Butt-Head, I feel a seizure coming on.
Cool!
Let's fry something.
Yeah, check it out...
Cook, cook, cook.
Grease is cool.
Hello? I'll have a cheeseburger with no ketchup.
And I'll also have....
a chicken sandwich...
with no tomatoes...
and...
with extra mayonnaise...
and some onion rings with no salt and....
Shut up!
I also want...
a large orange soda...
with no ice....
- And... - Shut up!
Go away!
Did you get all that?
We're, like, closed or something.
Go away!
- That was cool. - Yeah.
Customers suck.
Check this out...
Please hang up now. This is a recording.
Welcome to the World. May I help you?
You're pretty cool, Beavis.
Are your shakes made with real milk and ice cream,
or do you use that reconstituted shake mix stuff?
Yeah.
What do you mean: yeah, you use the shake mix,
- or yeah, you use the real stuff? - Yeah.
Let me talk to the manager.
Yeah.
I'm an assistant manger, sir.
Is there something I can help you with?
Yes, I'm trying to ask a very simple question here.
Are your shakes made from shake mix or from ice cream and milk?
We have vanilla, chocolate and strawberry.
- Yeah. - Forget it, forget it...
God, can't you idiots answer a simple question?
I'll go somewhere else...
God, morons! Jesus, couple of imbeciles!
- Let's go break something. - Yeah.
What's this?
He's smiling at you, Beavis.
Shut up, Butt-Head!
This guy always likes to show off his butt.
Yeah, and his butt sucks.
Oh yeah?
- How do you know? - Shut up, Butt-Head!
I'll kick your ass!
This is one of those workout tapes.
They make you work out to this tape, you end up looking like a wuss.
Yeah.
This video is making me sick.
What?
I hate words.
Yeah! Words suck!
If I wanted to read, I'd go to school.
This is college music.
Yeah. College music sucks!
- He said "dangle". - Yeah, yeah.
The angle of the dangle is inversely proportional to the heat of the meat.
Whoa! That was pretty cool!
- You're pretty smart, Beavis. - Yeah.
Pull my finger!
Pull my finger, dude!
No way.
Come on, pull my finger!
Nothing?
S.B.D.
That was cool.
Yes!
This kicks butt.
- Nirvana is cool. - Yeah.
Beavis's dad.
Is this, like, grudge music?
Grudge music is that stuff those guys from Seattle play.
Where is Seattle? Hey Butt-Head, where's Seattle?
You don't know?
It's this place where, like, stuff is, like, really cool.
Hello? Hello?
Hello, may I help you?
Hey Butt-Head, what is "Teen Spirit"?
Dude, if you don't know, I'm not gonna tell you.
Dumbass!
Look, this video has symbols.
Yeah, is that what they mean when they say "videos have symbolism"?
You said "ism".
Pep rallies suck.
Yeah.
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