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CUSTOMERS
SUCK

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"Here's the story
of a lovely lady".

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- Whoa check it out, "The Bunch".
- "Who was bringing up three very

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lovely girls.
All of them had hair of gold,

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like their mother.
The youngest one in curls".

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"Here's the story,
of a man named Brady".

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- "The Bunch" sucks.
- Yeah.

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I don't like stuff that sucks.

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Let's watch something cool.

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She is beating her carpet.

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Yeah, we should do that.

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It looks cool.

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You're white?

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He's got a hair stiffy.

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Old people.

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You're wrong?

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Yeah,
he is all wrong.

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And his hair is orange.

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You think those guys
sleep in separate beds?

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No way.

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Why are these guys so snotty?

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- Yeah, they look all pissed off.
- Yeah, and tired.

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What's that guy doing back there?

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He's Wang Chung'ing.

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That guy is peeing.

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That's cool.
I peed in the gym once.

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Really?

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You're pretty cool, Beavis.

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Where are the women in this video?

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Yeah, they need some chicks too.

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Hey Butt-Head, I feel a seizure coming on.

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Cool!

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Let's fry something.

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Yeah, check it out...

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Cook, cook, cook.

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Grease is cool.

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Hello? I'll have a
cheeseburger with no ketchup.

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And I'll also have....

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a chicken sandwich...

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with no tomatoes...

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and...

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with extra mayonnaise...

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and some onion rings
with no salt and....

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Shut up!

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I also want...

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a large orange soda...

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with no ice....

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- And...
- Shut up!

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Go away!

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Did you get all that?

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We're, like, closed
or something.

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Go away!

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- That was cool.
- Yeah.

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Customers suck.

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Check this out...

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Please hang up now.
This is a recording.

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Welcome to the World.
May I help you?

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You're pretty cool, Beavis.

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Are your shakes made with real
milk and ice cream,

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or do you use that reconstituted
shake mix stuff?

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Yeah.

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What do you mean: yeah,
you use the shake mix,

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- or yeah, you use the real stuff?
- Yeah.

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Let me talk to the manager.

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Yeah.

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I'm an assistant manger, sir.

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Is there something
I can help you with?

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Yes, I'm trying to ask a very
simple question here.

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Are your shakes made from shake mix
or from ice cream and milk?

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We have vanilla, chocolate
and strawberry.

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- Yeah.
- Forget it, forget it...

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God, can't you idiots answer
a simple question?

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I'll go somewhere else...

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God, morons!
Jesus, couple of imbeciles!

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- Let's go break something.
- Yeah.

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What's this?

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He's smiling at
you, Beavis.

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Shut up, Butt-Head!

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This guy always likes
to show off his butt.

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Yeah,
and his butt sucks.

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Oh yeah?

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- How do you know?
- Shut up, Butt-Head!

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I'll kick your ass!

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This is one of those
workout tapes.

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They make you work out to this
tape, you end up looking like a wuss.

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Yeah.

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This video is making me sick.

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What?

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I hate words.

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Yeah!
Words suck!

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If I wanted to read,
I'd go to school.

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This is college music.

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Yeah. College
music sucks!

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- He said "dangle".
- Yeah, yeah.

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The angle of the dangle is inversely
proportional to the heat of the meat.

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Whoa!
That was pretty cool!

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- You're pretty smart, Beavis.
- Yeah.

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Pull my finger!

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Pull my finger, dude!

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No way.

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Come on,
pull my finger!

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Nothing?

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S.B.D.

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That was cool.

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Yes!

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This kicks butt.

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- Nirvana is cool.
- Yeah.

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Beavis's dad.

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Is this, like, grudge music?

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Grudge music is that stuff
those guys from Seattle play.

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Where is Seattle?
Hey Butt-Head, where's Seattle?

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You don't know?

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It's this place where,
like, stuff is, like, really cool.

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Hello? Hello?

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Hello, may I help you?

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Hey Butt-Head, what is "Teen Spirit"?

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Dude, if you don't know,
I'm not gonna tell you.

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Dumbass!

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Look, this video has symbols.

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Yeah, is that what they mean
when they say "videos have symbolism"?

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You said "ism".

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Pep rallies suck.

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Yeah.

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