1
00:00:02,251 --> 00:00:04,918
Santiago, your test results from
the sergeant's exam have arrived.
2
00:00:05,002 --> 00:00:07,129
Ooh, everybody make room.
3
00:00:07,213 --> 00:00:09,840
Amy needs adequate space
to do her signature dork dance.
4
00:00:09,924 --> 00:00:11,132
I don't know if there's
going to be a dork dance.
5
00:00:11,216 --> 00:00:13,009
I mean, look how small that envelope is.
6
00:00:13,093 --> 00:00:14,427
That's not a big, good news envelope.
7
00:00:14,511 --> 00:00:16,137
That's a little, bad news envelope.
8
00:00:16,221 --> 00:00:18,096
What? That's nuts.
Sarge, tell her envelope size
9
00:00:18,180 --> 00:00:20,140
doesn't matter. If I'm being honest,
10
00:00:20,224 --> 00:00:21,725
I got a much bigger envelope. Oh, God.
11
00:00:21,809 --> 00:00:23,060
Unhelpful, Terry. Very unhelpful.
12
00:00:23,144 --> 00:00:24,477
Mine was bigger, too. Okay.
13
00:00:24,561 --> 00:00:25,728
I just won't ever open it.
14
00:00:25,812 --> 00:00:27,063
That way, I'll never get rejected.
15
00:00:27,147 --> 00:00:28,564
Fine, I'll open it. No!
16
00:00:28,648 --> 00:00:29,774
-[BONES CRACK]
-Oh, whoa!
17
00:00:29,858 --> 00:00:31,025
-[BOTH GRUNT]
-Do it harder.
18
00:00:31,109 --> 00:00:32,109
DIAZ: I opened it.
19
00:00:32,401 --> 00:00:34,694
-You passed.
-[GASPS] Oh, my God.
20
00:00:34,778 --> 00:00:36,029
I'm going to be a sergeant.
21
00:00:36,113 --> 00:00:37,197
You're going to be a sergeant!
22
00:00:37,281 --> 00:00:38,781
-Yes!
-[ALL CHEER]
23
00:00:38,948 --> 00:00:42,868
-♪ Oh, no, it's happening ♪
-Whoo!
24
00:00:42,952 --> 00:00:45,620
[GRUNTS] Yeah! That's my future wife!
25
00:00:45,704 --> 00:00:49,332
-[INHALES] So…
-[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
26
00:01:07,347 --> 00:01:10,141
Amy Santiago, put down that melon,
27
00:01:10,225 --> 00:01:12,060
for you are about to feast your eyes
28
00:01:12,144 --> 00:01:15,187
on one of the most
delicious cases in the NYPD.
29
00:01:15,271 --> 00:01:17,272
I don't like the personality
I've chosen here.
30
00:01:17,356 --> 00:01:19,149
I do. You sound like Caesar Flickerman
31
00:01:19,233 --> 00:01:21,192
welcoming new Hunger Games
tributes to the Quarter Quell.
32
00:01:21,276 --> 00:01:22,860
What's going on, Jake? In one week,
33
00:01:22,944 --> 00:01:24,237
you will officially become a sergeant.
34
00:01:24,321 --> 00:01:25,488
Which means this
case will be the last one
35
00:01:25,572 --> 00:01:26,656
we ever work together as detectives,
36
00:01:26,740 --> 00:01:27,989
so it has to be perfect.
37
00:01:28,073 --> 00:01:31,201
I present to you a serial arson case.
38
00:01:31,285 --> 00:01:33,161
Mmm-hmm. And the fires seem to be
39
00:01:33,245 --> 00:01:35,746
connected to the
Saturday crossword puzzle.
40
00:01:35,830 --> 00:01:36,997
Mama like. Two different buildings,
41
00:01:37,081 --> 00:01:38,124
two consecutive Saturdays,
42
00:01:38,208 --> 00:01:39,959
and a puzzle left at each crime scene,
43
00:01:40,043 --> 00:01:42,252
and a note was sent
to the puzzle's author,
44
00:01:42,336 --> 00:01:45,797
Mr. Melvin Stermley. Melvin Stermley?
45
00:01:45,881 --> 00:01:47,798
He's the best in the game!
46
00:01:47,882 --> 00:01:49,466
He made a puzzle once
where all the answers
47
00:01:49,550 --> 00:01:52,010
were just the word "puzzle"
in different languages.
48
00:01:52,094 --> 00:01:56,013
In Estonian, it was moistatus.
Yeah, well, your moistatus
49
00:01:56,097 --> 00:01:57,765
is about to be hecka moist…
50
00:01:57,849 --> 00:01:59,183
Don't call HR, we are getting married.
51
00:01:59,267 --> 00:02:00,977
Because Melvin Stermley is coming in
52
00:02:01,061 --> 00:02:04,104
to help us with the case! Sha-wing!
53
00:02:04,480 --> 00:02:06,732
Hey, I was going through
your calendar for some reason.
54
00:02:06,816 --> 00:02:09,191
It's your job. Right.
55
00:02:09,275 --> 00:02:12,069
Anyhoobs, I wanted to remind
you about the commissioner
56
00:02:12,153 --> 00:02:14,488
candidate meet and
greet, and your presentation
57
00:02:14,572 --> 00:02:15,989
to the selection committee.
58
00:02:16,073 --> 00:02:17,240
Being that I am your campaign manager…
59
00:02:17,324 --> 00:02:19,200
You are not. I did a little sleuthing
60
00:02:19,284 --> 00:02:21,870
on your rivals.
You want me to spill the beans?
61
00:02:21,954 --> 00:02:23,537
Why would you ever
intentionally spill beans?
62
00:02:23,621 --> 00:02:26,248
They're one of nature's most
densely packed protein sources,
63
00:02:26,332 --> 00:02:28,876
and they remain unsullied by flavor.
64
00:02:28,960 --> 00:02:30,793
Okay, forget it, I'll just mosey on out.
65
00:02:30,877 --> 00:02:32,795
Fine, fine, tell me everything.
66
00:02:32,879 --> 00:02:35,381
All right, have a seat. It's Gina time.
67
00:02:35,465 --> 00:02:37,215
Say hello to your compe-tish.
68
00:02:37,299 --> 00:02:41,178
Bryan McCann, John Kelly, and John Kelly.
69
00:02:41,262 --> 00:02:43,763
Yes, that's right, there
are two John Kellys.
70
00:02:43,847 --> 00:02:45,848
How are these not the same man?
71
00:02:45,932 --> 00:02:48,726
You should see their wives.
Or should I say, wife.
72
00:02:48,852 --> 00:02:50,977
Good God, do you know
what their speeches are about?
73
00:02:51,061 --> 00:02:52,103
I do.
74
00:02:52,187 --> 00:02:53,605
"Staying the course."
75
00:02:53,689 --> 00:02:54,898
"Maintaining the course," and
76
00:02:54,982 --> 00:02:56,941
"Blazing a path to a new future."
77
00:02:57,025 --> 00:02:59,276
I'm kidding, it's
"Remaining on the course."
78
00:02:59,360 --> 00:03:00,944
Unbelievable, none of these men
79
00:03:01,028 --> 00:03:02,946
have any interest in advancing the NYPD.
80
00:03:03,030 --> 00:03:04,781
That's right, because they're dinosaurs.
81
00:03:04,865 --> 00:03:06,574
But do you know what kills dinosaurs?
82
00:03:06,658 --> 00:03:07,658
Asteroids? No.
83
00:03:07,742 --> 00:03:09,076
You-steroids.
84
00:03:09,160 --> 00:03:12,287
You are going to kill these dinosaurs.
85
00:03:12,371 --> 00:03:14,956
Hey, hey, dum-dum. What are you thinking?
86
00:03:15,040 --> 00:03:16,958
Introducing Amy to her celebrity crush?
87
00:03:17,042 --> 00:03:18,834
Are you insane? Relax, Charles.
88
00:03:18,918 --> 00:03:21,086
It's not a crush, it's her
nerdy crossword puzzling hero.
89
00:03:21,170 --> 00:03:22,421
I mean, the guy's got
to be a massive dork.
90
00:03:22,505 --> 00:03:24,340
His name is Melvin
Stermley, for God's sake.
91
00:03:24,424 --> 00:03:27,133
Jake, he's here. Come meet Melvin.
92
00:03:27,217 --> 00:03:30,053
Hey, you can call me Vin.
93
00:03:30,137 --> 00:03:33,264
But, where is nerd?
94
00:03:35,016 --> 00:03:37,142
Whoa, is this a new detective car?
95
00:03:37,226 --> 00:03:39,060
It sure is, I put in the paperwork
96
00:03:39,144 --> 00:03:42,063
18 months ago, and got lucky.
They fast tracked it!
97
00:03:42,147 --> 00:03:46,024
Say hello to the Nine-Nine's
brand-new, fully loaded,
98
00:03:46,108 --> 00:03:48,652
sweet-as-hell crime-crusher on wheels!
99
00:03:48,861 --> 00:03:50,320
Holy crap, it has a heads-up display
100
00:03:50,404 --> 00:03:52,405
with built-in license plate reader.
101
00:03:52,489 --> 00:03:54,114
Who cares. It's got two burrito holders.
102
00:03:54,198 --> 00:03:55,491
Those are cup holders, Scully.
103
00:03:55,575 --> 00:03:57,117
Oh, yeah? Then what am I
supposed to use my thighs for, genius?
104
00:03:57,201 --> 00:04:00,286
Wait, who are you
assigning this car to, Sarge?
105
00:04:00,370 --> 00:04:02,455
Um, I was actually
thinking I'd get this one.
106
00:04:02,539 --> 00:04:04,082
Seriously? You suck.
107
00:04:04,166 --> 00:04:06,000
Whoa, the heater in my detective car
108
00:04:06,084 --> 00:04:08,252
hasn't worked in two years.
I don't have enough body fat
109
00:04:08,336 --> 00:04:10,003
to keep warm, Terry's sick of shivering.
110
00:04:10,087 --> 00:04:11,380
Okay, just seems a little selfish
111
00:04:11,464 --> 00:04:12,965
to keep it for yourself
when your detectives,
112
00:04:13,049 --> 00:04:14,131
who you took an oath to protect,
113
00:04:14,215 --> 00:04:15,883
are stuck driving their crappy old cars.
114
00:04:15,967 --> 00:04:18,345
Mine's the oldest.
I've never felt so abandoned.
115
00:04:18,595 --> 00:04:21,012
And I was actually abandoned.
They found me in a swamp.
116
00:04:21,096 --> 00:04:22,973
Fine. We'll do a drawing for it.
117
00:04:23,057 --> 00:04:25,141
But until then, no one touches it.
118
00:04:25,225 --> 00:04:26,351
HITCHCOCK: Oops, too late.
119
00:04:26,435 --> 00:04:28,394
I left a ranch handprint
on the windshield.
120
00:04:28,478 --> 00:04:29,895
Okay, so here are your puzzles
121
00:04:29,979 --> 00:04:31,564
from the days the arsonist set the fire.
122
00:04:31,648 --> 00:04:33,107
This is really good, Amy, thanks.
123
00:04:33,191 --> 00:04:36,067
Hey, so Vin, just curious.
Would you say you have
124
00:04:36,151 --> 00:04:37,986
the typical physique
of a puzzle maker or…
125
00:04:38,070 --> 00:04:40,154
Well, each puzzle only
pays a couple hundred bucks,
126
00:04:40,238 --> 00:04:41,572
so I mostly make my money modeling.
127
00:04:41,656 --> 00:04:43,365
Primarily swimwear. Yeah, I hear that.
128
00:04:43,449 --> 00:04:44,950
I could do that too, but I
make pretty good money here,
129
00:04:45,034 --> 00:04:46,159
so I don't really need to.
130
00:04:46,243 --> 00:04:47,870
Anyways, let's talk about the case.
131
00:04:47,954 --> 00:04:49,996
So here's the letter that
the arsonist sent to Vin.
132
00:04:50,080 --> 00:04:53,207
"Your clues I discombobulate
to teach you to conjugate,
133
00:04:53,291 --> 00:04:56,084
"the fool who fails to validate
will watch as I conflagrate."
134
00:04:56,168 --> 00:04:58,461
It seems like he's using my
crossword to tell me something.
135
00:04:58,545 --> 00:05:01,631
Oh, maybe we should look
at anagrams of the answers.
136
00:05:01,715 --> 00:05:03,966
That's really good, "O nasty amiga!"
137
00:05:04,050 --> 00:05:05,468
[LAUGHS] O what?
138
00:05:05,677 --> 00:05:07,803
He re-arranged the
letters of "Amy Santiago."
139
00:05:07,887 --> 00:05:10,805
He anagrammed me! Vin, do Jake Peralta.
140
00:05:10,889 --> 00:05:12,515
I doubt that's even possible.
Eat a jerk, pal.
141
00:05:12,599 --> 00:05:14,225
What, no one's ever said that phrase.
142
00:05:14,309 --> 00:05:16,184
I really think this anagram
approach makes a lot of sense.
143
00:05:16,268 --> 00:05:17,603
Seriously? Let's do it.
144
00:05:17,687 --> 00:05:19,104
I'll take even clues, you take odds.
145
00:05:19,188 --> 00:05:22,274
Great, and I will take
everyone's coffee order.
146
00:05:22,525 --> 00:05:24,191
That's equally helpful.
I don't drink coffee.
147
00:05:24,275 --> 00:05:26,819
But I'd love a kombucha. Great, I'll just
148
00:05:26,903 --> 00:05:28,195
walk to the kombucha store.
149
00:05:28,279 --> 00:05:31,448
Everything okay? Yeah, of course.
150
00:05:31,532 --> 00:05:33,241
PERALTA: You can't
wear a coat over a tank.
151
00:05:33,325 --> 00:05:35,994
You're not Ryan Gosling.
Feeling jealous, buddy?
152
00:05:36,078 --> 00:05:38,037
No, not at all.
I mean, I am a little surprised
153
00:05:38,121 --> 00:05:40,331
that somebody named
Melvin is so bodacious,
154
00:05:40,415 --> 00:05:42,458
but I feel that jealousy
is an ugly emotion.
155
00:05:42,542 --> 00:05:44,208
That you are feeling. And I'm just glad
156
00:05:44,292 --> 00:05:45,293
that Amy is spending
some time with her hero.
157
00:05:45,377 --> 00:05:47,045
Who is super hot. Charles, let it go.
158
00:05:47,129 --> 00:05:48,546
And smart. I'm serious, stop.
159
00:05:48,630 --> 00:05:50,256
[LAUGHS]
160
00:05:50,340 --> 00:05:51,965
And hilarious.
161
00:05:52,049 --> 00:05:53,259
Eat a jerk, pal!
162
00:05:55,720 --> 00:05:56,720
PERALTA: So, how's it going in here?
163
00:05:56,804 --> 00:05:58,095
Vin, I see you're still coatless.
164
00:05:58,179 --> 00:06:00,014
I run hot, like a wolf. Oh, I see.
165
00:06:00,098 --> 00:06:01,515
I wonder if the word "conjugate"
166
00:06:01,599 --> 00:06:03,476
in the arsonist's letter
means we should focus on
167
00:06:03,560 --> 00:06:05,811
the verb answers. Cool, I love verbs.
168
00:06:06,228 --> 00:06:08,688
-Second favorite part of speech.
-BOTH: After prepositions.
169
00:06:08,772 --> 00:06:10,565
[LAUGHS] Yeah, words are cool.
170
00:06:10,649 --> 00:06:12,316
But maybe we should switch gears a bit,
171
00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:14,193
and get back to some good
old-fashioned police work.
172
00:06:14,277 --> 00:06:15,861
What are you thinking?
Well, whoever's setting
173
00:06:15,945 --> 00:06:17,446
these fires is clearly
trying to humiliate Vin.
174
00:06:17,530 --> 00:06:19,155
You know, make a puzzle he can't solve.
175
00:06:19,239 --> 00:06:20,949
So maybe we should focus
on people that don't like you.
176
00:06:21,033 --> 00:06:22,575
Jake has a point about motive.
177
00:06:22,659 --> 00:06:24,077
Maybe another puzzler
wants to take you down.
178
00:06:24,161 --> 00:06:25,702
Well, if you're looking
for a puzzle head,
179
00:06:25,786 --> 00:06:28,163
I'm hosting a crossword night
at the Turnkey Bar tonight.
180
00:06:28,247 --> 00:06:29,915
Oh, I've always wanted to go there.
181
00:06:29,999 --> 00:06:31,708
That place is a total puzz-hang.
182
00:06:31,792 --> 00:06:34,335
Ah, gross, all right,
so we'll go undercover,
183
00:06:34,419 --> 00:06:36,337
chat some people up, and
see if we can't find our arsonist.
184
00:06:36,421 --> 00:06:38,255
Good idea. Oh, Amy likes my plan.
185
00:06:38,339 --> 00:06:42,592
Great, so, Vin, why don't we
just get this coat back on you,
186
00:06:42,676 --> 00:06:44,928
and I'll help you get
out of the door, here.
187
00:06:45,012 --> 00:06:47,388
And we'll see you tonight, okay, bye!
188
00:06:47,472 --> 00:06:49,848
[LAUGHS] The best. Right?
189
00:06:49,932 --> 00:06:51,308
Yeah!
190
00:06:51,392 --> 00:06:53,810
GINA: Wow, the competition
looks even older in person.
191
00:06:53,894 --> 00:06:55,937
What do you think these
dinosaurs are talking about?
192
00:06:56,021 --> 00:06:57,605
Where to find Mattock reruns?
193
00:06:57,689 --> 00:06:58,815
Be professional, Gina.
194
00:06:58,899 --> 00:07:00,399
Like the homecare nurses
195
00:07:00,483 --> 00:07:02,317
who will tuck them into bed tonight.
196
00:07:02,401 --> 00:07:03,486
[LAUGHS]
197
00:07:03,694 --> 00:07:05,070
Oh, hello, John. Raymond.
198
00:07:05,154 --> 00:07:06,612
I just want to say what an honor it is
199
00:07:06,696 --> 00:07:07,822
to be up for the same job
200
00:07:07,906 --> 00:07:10,741
as a man with your… Experience.
201
00:07:10,825 --> 00:07:12,910
Thank you.
202
00:07:12,994 --> 00:07:15,412
I paused suggestively
before I said "experience,"
203
00:07:15,496 --> 00:07:17,414
so he would know it
wasn't really a compliment.
204
00:07:17,498 --> 00:07:19,874
Who are you talking to?
I invented the pause.
205
00:07:19,958 --> 00:07:22,710
Raymond Holt, I'm
Captain Olivia Crawford.
206
00:07:22,794 --> 00:07:23,794
I'm the new candidate for commissioner.
207
00:07:23,878 --> 00:07:25,004
Oh? Excuse me?
208
00:07:25,088 --> 00:07:26,797
Yeah, I replaced the other candidate.
209
00:07:26,881 --> 00:07:28,840
He retired to spend more
time with his grandchildren.
210
00:07:28,924 --> 00:07:30,800
Anyway, I just wanted
to say what a privilege it is
211
00:07:30,884 --> 00:07:35,762
to be up for the same job
as a man with your… Tenure.
212
00:07:35,846 --> 00:07:38,765
Oh, damn. She paused, dude.
In error, I am certain.
213
00:07:38,849 --> 00:07:40,058
Olivia, I may be older than you,
214
00:07:40,142 --> 00:07:41,517
but I am not some dinosaur
215
00:07:41,601 --> 00:07:43,227
intent on maintaining the status quo.
216
00:07:43,311 --> 00:07:46,230
For example, I would
add a social media officer
217
00:07:46,314 --> 00:07:48,481
to every precinct. Interesting.
218
00:07:48,565 --> 00:07:50,817
I plan on eliminating
precincts all together.
219
00:07:50,901 --> 00:07:53,028
What, no precincts?
That's not how we do things.
220
00:07:53,112 --> 00:07:56,780
That's exactly what
both John Kellys said.
221
00:07:56,864 --> 00:07:59,491
Oh no, she's the asteroid.
222
00:07:59,575 --> 00:08:02,452
And I don't want to say
you're a dinosaur, but…
223
00:08:02,536 --> 00:08:04,287
[WHISPERING] You're a dinosaur.
224
00:08:04,371 --> 00:08:07,040
PERALTA: Wow, a whole
crowd full of puzzlers.
225
00:08:07,332 --> 00:08:08,833
Gotta be honest, I'm
a little disappointed
226
00:08:08,917 --> 00:08:10,667
no one's wearing a green
suit covered in question marks.
227
00:08:10,751 --> 00:08:12,669
That guy has crossword puzzle pants.
228
00:08:12,753 --> 00:08:15,505
Does that scratch your itch?
Very much so, thanks.
229
00:08:15,589 --> 00:08:18,466
All right, we should probably
start talking to people on line.
230
00:08:18,550 --> 00:08:19,967
Pardon me there, fellow puzzler.
231
00:08:20,051 --> 00:08:21,719
What do you think of Melvin Stermley?
232
00:08:21,803 --> 00:08:23,803
Uh, you mean my future husband?
233
00:08:23,887 --> 00:08:25,096
Oh, so you like his puzzles?
234
00:08:25,180 --> 00:08:27,683
And his face, body, and brain and body.
235
00:08:27,891 --> 00:08:28,975
Honestly, Vin makes all other men
236
00:08:29,059 --> 00:08:30,768
seem really stupid and ugly.
237
00:08:30,852 --> 00:08:32,061
Okay, well, thank you for your
238
00:08:32,145 --> 00:08:33,645
very candid and hurtful input.
239
00:08:33,729 --> 00:08:36,440
You must solve one of
Vin's puzzles to enter.
240
00:08:36,524 --> 00:08:38,149
Rearrange the letters of this phrase
241
00:08:38,233 --> 00:08:40,068
to reveal a place in the world.
242
00:08:40,193 --> 00:08:42,653
[PERALTA READING]
243
00:08:42,737 --> 00:08:45,072
Oh, come on, there's no
place with that many letters in it.
244
00:08:45,156 --> 00:08:46,656
I mean, most places
are, like, four letters.
245
00:08:46,740 --> 00:08:50,327
You know, park, mall, dump…
United Arab Emirates!
246
00:08:50,411 --> 00:08:52,369
You may enter. [EXHALES]
247
00:08:52,453 --> 00:08:54,705
Uh, you must each answer a puzzle.
248
00:08:54,789 --> 00:08:56,332
Oh… Great.
249
00:08:56,416 --> 00:08:58,291
Unscramble the letters in this phrase
250
00:08:58,375 --> 00:09:01,170
to reveal the name of a
film based on a classic novel.
251
00:09:01,461 --> 00:09:04,339
Okay. "Sad anus loser, I go in."
252
00:09:04,423 --> 00:09:06,840
You know, I feel like these
puzzles are actually very pointed.
253
00:09:06,924 --> 00:09:08,467
Forget it, I got this.
254
00:09:08,551 --> 00:09:12,178
-Uh, A, R, uh…
-[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]
255
00:09:12,262 --> 00:09:13,889
Puzzle solved.
256
00:09:15,765 --> 00:09:17,600
[GRUNTS]
257
00:09:17,684 --> 00:09:19,017
[LAUGHS]
258
00:09:19,101 --> 00:09:22,395
Who's the anus loser now?
259
00:09:22,479 --> 00:09:24,564
[GRUNTS] It's still me.
260
00:09:24,648 --> 00:09:27,567
Okay, one of us is about to get access
261
00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:30,653
to the best detective car
ever, and everyone else
262
00:09:30,737 --> 00:09:32,612
will go back to driving junk cars
263
00:09:32,696 --> 00:09:34,197
for the rest of your junk lives.
264
00:09:34,281 --> 00:09:35,990
Damn, Sarge, that took a dark turn.
265
00:09:36,074 --> 00:09:38,034
I want seat warmers. I want them bad.
266
00:09:38,118 --> 00:09:39,326
I need this car too.
267
00:09:39,410 --> 00:09:41,453
I'm sick of riding my
Vespa to work every day.
268
00:09:41,537 --> 00:09:43,455
Well, being on the seat
behind you is no picnic either.
269
00:09:43,539 --> 00:09:45,458
All right, here it goes.
270
00:09:47,959 --> 00:09:49,753
[LAUGHS] What?
271
00:09:50,003 --> 00:09:53,214
Oh, my God, it says "Terry." I won!
272
00:09:53,464 --> 00:09:55,757
♪ Terry got a car Terry got a car ♪
273
00:09:55,841 --> 00:09:57,175
No way. You cheated.
274
00:09:57,259 --> 00:09:58,927
What? I didn't cheat.
275
00:09:59,011 --> 00:10:00,929
I bet every slip in there says Terry.
276
00:10:03,306 --> 00:10:04,890
He filled it full of fake people.
277
00:10:04,974 --> 00:10:07,475
Who the hell is Norm?
That's Scully's first name.
278
00:10:07,559 --> 00:10:09,227
-It is?
-JEFFORDS: Stop being sore losers.
279
00:10:09,311 --> 00:10:10,645
I won fair and square.
280
00:10:10,729 --> 00:10:11,980
No, you won unfair and un-square,
281
00:10:12,064 --> 00:10:13,981
-and I'm going to prove it.
-HITCHCOCK: And if we can't,
282
00:10:14,065 --> 00:10:15,733
we'll plant it. No.
283
00:10:15,900 --> 00:10:17,359
Charles, I need your help.
What's the best way
284
00:10:17,443 --> 00:10:18,819
to dry out a pant leg that's
285
00:10:18,903 --> 00:10:20,696
been soaked in toilet water?
Wait 28 minutes.
286
00:10:20,780 --> 00:10:22,864
Trust me, that's how long it
takes for toilet pants to dry.
287
00:10:22,948 --> 00:10:24,532
Well, I can't just be standing around
288
00:10:24,616 --> 00:10:26,242
for half an hour while
Amy chats it up with Vin.
289
00:10:26,326 --> 00:10:28,034
Ah, so it's not toilet water.
290
00:10:28,118 --> 00:10:29,786
You're drenched in jealousy.
291
00:10:29,870 --> 00:10:31,788
I told you before,
jealousy is an ugly emotion
292
00:10:31,872 --> 00:10:33,707
that I don't feel.
Besides, Amy picked my plan
293
00:10:33,791 --> 00:10:35,708
to come here.
Why would I be jealous of Vin?
294
00:10:35,792 --> 00:10:38,669
Because of his body, and
face, and brain and body.
295
00:10:38,753 --> 00:10:40,212
Why does everybody say "body" twice?
296
00:10:40,296 --> 00:10:41,796
-[DOOR OPENING]
-Oh, hang on a second.
297
00:10:41,880 --> 00:10:43,423
Somebody's coming Vin is on fire tonight.
298
00:10:43,507 --> 00:10:45,341
He's phenomenal. No wonder the Saturday
299
00:10:45,425 --> 00:10:47,093
crossword replaced Sam with him.
300
00:10:47,177 --> 00:10:49,428
Sam must be pissed.
I heard the only place
301
00:10:49,512 --> 00:10:51,712
that buys his puzzles
now is Parade magazine.
302
00:10:51,847 --> 00:10:53,891
The hardest clue he had in his last one
303
00:10:53,975 --> 00:10:55,850
was a five-letter word for a game
304
00:10:55,934 --> 00:10:58,478
popular in nursing homes. Bingo.
305
00:10:58,645 --> 00:10:59,812
I figured out who the arsonist is.
306
00:10:59,896 --> 00:11:01,814
It's this guy named Sam.
He's a puzzle maker.
307
00:11:01,898 --> 00:11:03,815
And Vin took his job. Sam Jepson?
308
00:11:03,899 --> 00:11:05,150
Oh, he's not the arsonist.
309
00:11:05,234 --> 00:11:06,568
He's been out of town for weeks.
310
00:11:06,652 --> 00:11:07,652
And he's one of my closest friends.
311
00:11:07,736 --> 00:11:08,820
He let me stay on his couch
312
00:11:08,904 --> 00:11:10,613
when Anna Kournikova and I broke up.
313
00:11:10,697 --> 00:11:12,781
[SCOFFS] Well, I mean,
she never won a major, so…
314
00:11:12,865 --> 00:11:14,783
All right, fine, if I'm so
wrong, what did you guys find?
315
00:11:14,867 --> 00:11:16,284
Both fires were located
316
00:11:16,368 --> 00:11:17,911
at the intersection of numbered streets.
317
00:11:17,995 --> 00:11:19,621
If you match those
intersections with the same
318
00:11:19,705 --> 00:11:21,748
intersections of the
numbered clues in the puzzles,
319
00:11:21,832 --> 00:11:23,124
you get the letters "M-A".
320
00:11:23,208 --> 00:11:24,750
We think the arsonist
is spelling his name.
321
00:11:24,834 --> 00:11:25,918
We can build a puzzle around that,
322
00:11:26,002 --> 00:11:27,920
and catch him setting his next fire.
323
00:11:28,004 --> 00:11:30,088
But we have a suspect
with a crystal clear motive.
324
00:11:30,172 --> 00:11:32,798
I think we need to solve
this like cops, not puzzlers.
325
00:11:32,882 --> 00:11:34,592
I hear you, Jake.
But people who make crosswords
326
00:11:34,676 --> 00:11:35,843
love hiding their names in their puzzles.
327
00:11:35,927 --> 00:11:37,636
It's our version of a self-portrait.
328
00:11:37,720 --> 00:11:38,803
[SIGHS] All right, you know what?
329
00:11:38,887 --> 00:11:40,889
Amy, it's your last case, you decide.
330
00:11:40,973 --> 00:11:42,807
Should we go with
Vin's wacky little plan,
331
00:11:42,891 --> 00:11:44,975
or should we go with Sam Jepson,
332
00:11:45,059 --> 00:11:47,686
my exceptionally solid lead?
I see where you're
333
00:11:47,770 --> 00:11:50,022
coming from, Jake,
but this is Vin's world,
334
00:11:50,106 --> 00:11:52,315
and I think we should
go with his strategy.
335
00:11:52,399 --> 00:11:54,234
Sound good? Yeah.
336
00:11:54,318 --> 00:11:56,778
Yeah, sounds great. Okay, great.
337
00:11:56,862 --> 00:11:59,321
Let's go. Yeah, let's go.
338
00:11:59,405 --> 00:12:02,241
Oh, no, ugly emotion.
339
00:12:04,160 --> 00:12:06,452
Okay, so we think the
arsonist is using the fires
340
00:12:06,536 --> 00:12:08,537
to spell out his name.
The most common third letter
341
00:12:08,621 --> 00:12:11,374
in names that start with
"M-A" are I for Malcolm,
342
00:12:11,458 --> 00:12:13,375
X for Max, R for Mark, and T for Matthew.
343
00:12:13,459 --> 00:12:15,669
Or his name is Sam, and
he's spelling it backwards.
344
00:12:15,753 --> 00:12:17,128
Uh-huh.
345
00:12:17,212 --> 00:12:19,380
Let's just stick with the L-X-R-T plan.
346
00:12:19,589 --> 00:12:21,257
Copy that. Vin designed today's puzzle
347
00:12:21,341 --> 00:12:23,217
using only one of each of those letters.
348
00:12:23,301 --> 00:12:24,843
Isn't that the craziest
thing you've ever seen?
349
00:12:24,927 --> 00:12:26,552
I don't know, I mean, remember that time
350
00:12:26,636 --> 00:12:28,304
we investigated the
disappearance of Mrs. Jackson,
351
00:12:28,388 --> 00:12:30,223
and it turned out her parrot
ate her, bones and all?
352
00:12:30,307 --> 00:12:32,100
That was pretty crazy. That was crazy.
353
00:12:32,184 --> 00:12:33,517
-Yeah.
-[BOTH LAUGH]
354
00:12:33,601 --> 00:12:35,227
So tonight, we'll stake
out the intersections
355
00:12:35,311 --> 00:12:37,562
that correspond to where
the L, X, R, and T are
356
00:12:37,646 --> 00:12:40,147
in Vin's puzzle, and hopefully
catch the arsonist in the act.
357
00:12:40,231 --> 00:12:43,401
I'll take the M-A-T corner,
you take the M-A-R corner,
358
00:12:43,485 --> 00:12:45,935
and we'll have patrolman
take the M-A-X and M-A-L.
359
00:12:46,570 --> 00:12:47,988
Cool? Yep, very cool.
360
00:12:48,072 --> 00:12:50,115
Okay, great, I'll get the
surveillance equipment.
361
00:12:50,199 --> 00:12:52,450
[EXHALES] Shame.
362
00:12:52,534 --> 00:12:54,493
Shame, shame, shame.
363
00:12:54,577 --> 00:12:55,661
I can't believe you're doing Vin's plan.
364
00:12:55,745 --> 00:12:57,621
Will you relax? I'm only doing it
365
00:12:57,705 --> 00:12:59,248
because someone else
is going to do my plan.
366
00:12:59,332 --> 00:13:00,498
Who? You.
367
00:13:00,582 --> 00:13:02,625
While I'm busy watching nothing
happen on my stupid corner,
368
00:13:02,709 --> 00:13:03,793
you're going to stake
out Sam's apartment.
369
00:13:03,877 --> 00:13:06,170
Then when he sets a fire, Vin
is going to look like a dummy.
370
00:13:06,254 --> 00:13:08,171
That's right, use the jealousy, Jake.
371
00:13:08,255 --> 00:13:10,340
It will give you unimaginable power.
372
00:13:10,424 --> 00:13:13,302
Yes, yes, I can feel it
coursing through my veins.
373
00:13:13,386 --> 00:13:14,427
Oh, my hand cramped. Oh.
374
00:13:14,511 --> 00:13:15,845
Oh, it's stuck in a claw.
375
00:13:16,054 --> 00:13:17,555
It's a claw now. Oh.
376
00:13:17,639 --> 00:13:20,433
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
What are you doing?
377
00:13:20,517 --> 00:13:22,350
You're snacking? This is from the guy
378
00:13:22,434 --> 00:13:24,102
who told me that eating finger foods
379
00:13:24,186 --> 00:13:25,478
was the one true sign of depression?
380
00:13:25,562 --> 00:13:27,105
Then watch me chew, Gina.
381
00:13:27,189 --> 00:13:29,606
I'm a creature of the past.
I'm a dinosaur.
382
00:13:29,690 --> 00:13:32,026
No, you are not, you're
the best man for the job.
383
00:13:32,110 --> 00:13:33,861
And I think you know what
you have to do to get it.
384
00:13:33,945 --> 00:13:36,654
Believe in myself and
give a great presentation?
385
00:13:36,738 --> 00:13:38,489
Not even close. That's the head
386
00:13:38,573 --> 00:13:41,159
of the committee over
there, gorging on crab cakes.
387
00:13:41,451 --> 00:13:43,160
Just go up to him and sabotage Olivia.
388
00:13:43,244 --> 00:13:44,453
Um…
389
00:13:44,537 --> 00:13:46,371
I don't think I can do that.
Well, you can't really be
390
00:13:46,455 --> 00:13:48,582
the best commissioner
the NYPD has ever had
391
00:13:48,666 --> 00:13:50,417
if you're not the commissioner.
392
00:13:51,626 --> 00:13:55,546
Right. You're right, I want this.
393
00:13:55,630 --> 00:13:58,214
And I will do good things for the city.
394
00:13:58,298 --> 00:14:00,592
Yes, you will. Now, get over there,
395
00:14:00,717 --> 00:14:04,595
and crap all over Olivia's ideas.
396
00:14:04,804 --> 00:14:08,223
Patrick, nice to see you. Hello, Raymond.
397
00:14:08,307 --> 00:14:10,016
Shall we small-talk? Mmm.
398
00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:12,226
I've been thinking
recently about how vital
399
00:14:12,310 --> 00:14:14,854
the existence of
precincts is to the NYPD.
400
00:14:14,938 --> 00:14:17,230
Oh, you spoke to Crawford.
401
00:14:17,314 --> 00:14:19,316
She's very forward thinking, isn't she?
402
00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:21,234
I suppose you could call it that.
403
00:14:21,318 --> 00:14:22,652
I mean, I wouldn't, but…
404
00:14:22,736 --> 00:14:25,821
Ray, you don't need to worry about her.
405
00:14:25,905 --> 00:14:30,575
Between you and me, we had
to nominate a girl for PR reasons.
406
00:14:30,659 --> 00:14:32,410
There's no way the NYPD
407
00:14:32,494 --> 00:14:35,122
is ready for a female commissioner.
408
00:14:35,497 --> 00:14:37,456
Oh. Hey.
409
00:14:37,540 --> 00:14:39,249
Grab a crab cake before we start.
410
00:14:39,333 --> 00:14:41,002
Real crab, big chunks.
411
00:14:43,713 --> 00:14:44,317
[DOOR CLOSES]
412
00:14:44,401 --> 00:14:46,297
Okay, no one saw Sarge
do anything suspicious
413
00:14:46,381 --> 00:14:48,216
on the day of the drawing.
We got nothing.
414
00:14:48,300 --> 00:14:50,510
Speak for yourself, sister.
We found a smoking gun.
415
00:14:50,594 --> 00:14:51,718
Play it, Hitchcock.
416
00:14:51,802 --> 00:14:52,845
Voilà. Bah-boom.
417
00:14:53,179 --> 00:14:55,013
-DIAZ: What? I don't see anything.
-HITCHCOCK: Focus on the butt.
418
00:14:55,097 --> 00:14:57,057
-The butt don't lie.
-SCULLY: He squeezed his cheeks
419
00:14:57,141 --> 00:15:00,267
before he opened the slip.
He knew his name was on it.
420
00:15:00,351 --> 00:15:02,019
It was a preemptive celebration clench.
421
00:15:02,103 --> 00:15:04,647
I don't know, we need
better proof than a butt clench
422
00:15:04,731 --> 00:15:06,689
to take down Terry. I did it, okay?
423
00:15:06,773 --> 00:15:09,818
I cheated.
I wanted that car, and I took it.
424
00:15:09,902 --> 00:15:12,653
And it's killing me.
I couldn't sleep all night.
425
00:15:12,737 --> 00:15:14,405
I just kept hearing the blinker.
426
00:15:14,489 --> 00:15:17,408
[CHANTING]
You cheat you cheat, you cheat
427
00:15:17,492 --> 00:15:19,742
Here are the keys. Take the damn car.
428
00:15:19,826 --> 00:15:21,702
Terry doesn't deserve it.
429
00:15:21,786 --> 00:15:24,831
And that is why I became a cop.
430
00:15:26,123 --> 00:15:28,792
PERALTA: Hey, Charles, nothing's
happening on my M-A-R corner.
431
00:15:28,876 --> 00:15:31,461
Any movement at Sam's place?
No, I did, however, see
432
00:15:31,545 --> 00:15:33,879
a cool-looking dude in a
ponytail on a Razor scooter.
433
00:15:33,963 --> 00:15:35,714
I have to admit, I like the look.
434
00:15:35,798 --> 00:15:38,050
Is it possible I'm wrong
and Sam is out of town?
435
00:15:38,134 --> 00:15:39,843
Vin's plan is actually kind of smart.
436
00:15:39,927 --> 00:15:42,637
Jake, I have eyes on Sam.
Yes! Suck it, Vin.
437
00:15:42,721 --> 00:15:44,472
My judgment is clear and I am a genius.
438
00:15:44,556 --> 00:15:45,598
Charles, I'll be right there.
439
00:15:45,682 --> 00:15:47,474
But enough about the crab cakes.
440
00:15:47,558 --> 00:15:50,436
[LAUGHTER] Our first presentation tonight
441
00:15:50,520 --> 00:15:52,479
will be from the 99th Precinct's
442
00:15:52,563 --> 00:15:54,313
Captain Raymond Holt. Raymond?
443
00:15:54,397 --> 00:15:57,400
[APPLAUSE]
444
00:15:57,484 --> 00:15:59,777
Let me begin with a hilarious joke.
445
00:15:59,861 --> 00:16:02,154
I'm surprised I was on the
short list for commissioner.
446
00:16:02,238 --> 00:16:05,532
-After all, I am 6' tall.
-[LAUGHTER]
447
00:16:05,616 --> 00:16:08,659
Actually, what I have to say
tonight is no laughing matter.
448
00:16:08,743 --> 00:16:10,828
I was just told by a member
of the selection committee
449
00:16:10,912 --> 00:16:12,746
that they have no intention
450
00:16:12,830 --> 00:16:14,880
of ever choosing a woman to run the NYPD.
451
00:16:15,249 --> 00:16:16,583
I suppose I should have been relieved,
452
00:16:16,667 --> 00:16:19,127
because Captain Crawford
is a damn qualified candidate.
453
00:16:19,211 --> 00:16:21,254
But as someone who has
been denied opportunity
454
00:16:21,338 --> 00:16:23,213
because of who I am,
455
00:16:23,297 --> 00:16:25,716
I cannot stand by and watch
it happen to someone else.
456
00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:28,593
So, I will be reserving my presentation
457
00:16:28,677 --> 00:16:31,179
for a selection committee that will judge
458
00:16:31,263 --> 00:16:33,055
all of the candidates fairly.
459
00:16:33,139 --> 00:16:34,724
And let's be honest.
460
00:16:35,058 --> 00:16:36,892
The crab cakes were only so-so.
461
00:16:36,976 --> 00:16:39,519
-[CROWD MURMURS]
-Thank you.
462
00:16:39,603 --> 00:16:41,229
All right, talk to me, what's happening?
463
00:16:41,313 --> 00:16:43,898
What's Sammy up to?
Well, he just sat down
464
00:16:43,982 --> 00:16:45,983
on the plaza. Okay, he's opening up
465
00:16:46,067 --> 00:16:49,152
his backpack and pulling out
what appears to be a thermos.
466
00:16:49,236 --> 00:16:51,821
Possibly containing some
sort of accelerant-like gasoline.
467
00:16:51,905 --> 00:16:53,740
Yup. No, he's eating it
468
00:16:53,824 --> 00:16:55,408
with a spoon.
It's soup, he's eating soup.
469
00:16:55,492 --> 00:16:57,743
Well, maybe he's fueling
up for a night of starting fires.
470
00:16:57,827 --> 00:16:59,286
He just pulled out a lighter!
471
00:16:59,370 --> 00:17:02,289
Nope, it's not a lighter.
It's a bumblebee PEZ dispenser.
472
00:17:02,373 --> 00:17:03,706
Hmm. Ooh, he's making
473
00:17:03,790 --> 00:17:05,625
a phone call.
Quick, get the parabolic mic.
474
00:17:05,709 --> 00:17:08,544
-[LAUGHS]
-JEPSON: Mom, I did something bad.
475
00:17:08,628 --> 00:17:10,086
Yeah, you set some fires.
476
00:17:10,170 --> 00:17:12,672
I proposed to Gretchen and she said no.
477
00:17:12,756 --> 00:17:15,800
So you set some fires.
So, I left Myrtle Beach.
478
00:17:15,884 --> 00:17:17,801
Two weeks ago, and
then you set some fires.
479
00:17:17,885 --> 00:17:19,678
No, I got back home today.
480
00:17:19,762 --> 00:17:21,847
Yeah, all my fish were dead.
481
00:17:21,931 --> 00:17:23,231
Okay, so Sam didn't do it.
482
00:17:23,433 --> 00:17:25,016
I should probably get back to my corner.
483
00:17:25,100 --> 00:17:27,393
Just for the record, just
because I was wrong about Sam,
484
00:17:27,477 --> 00:17:29,729
does not mean that Vin was right.
485
00:17:29,813 --> 00:17:33,941
-[SIREN WAILS]
-Well, this is disappointing.
486
00:17:36,444 --> 00:17:38,278
I can't believe you left your post.
487
00:17:38,403 --> 00:17:39,654
What, the plan wasn't yours,
488
00:17:39,738 --> 00:17:41,239
so you didn't think it
was worth following?
489
00:17:41,323 --> 00:17:43,282
Well, because of your juvenile behavior,
490
00:17:43,366 --> 00:17:45,158
one of our city's finest
491
00:17:45,242 --> 00:17:47,702
abandoned lard factories
is now burned to the ground.
492
00:17:47,786 --> 00:17:49,913
My gut told me that Sam
Jepson was setting the fires.
493
00:17:49,997 --> 00:17:51,456
Although I now realize his actual life
494
00:17:51,540 --> 00:17:53,207
is much sadder than
that of a serial arsonist.
495
00:17:53,291 --> 00:17:55,209
But we agreed to do Vin's plan.
496
00:17:55,293 --> 00:17:56,669
So what? Vin is not a cop.
497
00:17:56,753 --> 00:17:58,170
Why do you keep siding
with him instead of me?
498
00:17:58,254 --> 00:17:59,837
Oh, let me guess, because he was right,
499
00:17:59,921 --> 00:18:01,256
and the building was
on fire, and he's perfect?
500
00:18:01,340 --> 00:18:03,550
Wait, are you jealous of Vin?
501
00:18:03,634 --> 00:18:06,385
[SCOFFS] Jake?
502
00:18:06,469 --> 00:18:08,220
All right, I didn't want to say anything
503
00:18:08,304 --> 00:18:10,514
because it's a gross emotion,
but, yes, I am a little bit
504
00:18:10,598 --> 00:18:13,015
jealous of the super smart supermodel.
505
00:18:13,099 --> 00:18:14,517
This was our last case together.
506
00:18:14,601 --> 00:18:16,435
And you and him have
been joined at the hip.
507
00:18:16,519 --> 00:18:18,521
Or in his case, that super sexy V muscle
508
00:18:18,605 --> 00:18:20,021
that I don't understand how to tone.
509
00:18:20,105 --> 00:18:22,107
He told me, it's a lot
of bicycle crunches.
510
00:18:22,191 --> 00:18:23,525
Crunches on a bicycle?
511
00:18:23,609 --> 00:18:25,318
That's crazy, you
would just fall right off.
512
00:18:25,402 --> 00:18:28,237
Babe, you have no
reason to be jealous of him.
513
00:18:28,321 --> 00:18:30,365
[EXHALES] I just…
514
00:18:30,782 --> 00:18:32,241
I don't want you to wake up one day
515
00:18:32,325 --> 00:18:35,451
and wish that you were with
someone as smart as you are.
516
00:18:35,535 --> 00:18:37,329
I am with someone as smart as I am.
517
00:18:37,579 --> 00:18:38,580
You.
518
00:18:38,664 --> 00:18:40,372
You're a brilliant detective.
519
00:18:40,456 --> 00:18:42,165
I love the way you think.
520
00:18:42,249 --> 00:18:44,418
That's why I want to marry you.
521
00:18:45,836 --> 00:18:47,420
Marry me.
522
00:18:48,004 --> 00:18:49,922
Marry. Oh, my God, look.
523
00:18:50,006 --> 00:18:52,258
The arsonist spelled M-A-R,
but they were going to spell
524
00:18:52,342 --> 00:18:54,676
M-A-R-R-Y! Or…
525
00:18:54,760 --> 00:18:56,386
Conjugate. Conjugate means marry!
526
00:18:56,470 --> 00:18:58,096
Yes, and who wants to marry Vin?
527
00:18:58,180 --> 00:18:59,848
BOTH: The lady from the bar!
528
00:18:59,932 --> 00:19:02,349
Hey, puzzle chick, unscramble this.
529
00:19:02,433 --> 00:19:05,311
You're going to "ailj."
530
00:19:06,396 --> 00:19:08,062
All right, Sarge. The car is yours.
531
00:19:08,146 --> 00:19:09,564
What? Why?
532
00:19:09,648 --> 00:19:11,774
I don't deserve that car.
I don't know about that.
533
00:19:11,858 --> 00:19:14,235
I went back and watched the
tapes to figure out how you did it.
534
00:19:14,319 --> 00:19:15,402
Right before the drawing,
535
00:19:15,486 --> 00:19:17,279
you got a peanut butter
cup out of the freezer.
536
00:19:17,363 --> 00:19:19,448
The thing is, you don't
eat sugar past 4 p.m.
537
00:19:19,532 --> 00:19:20,574
Could have been a cheat day.
538
00:19:20,658 --> 00:19:22,366
Oh, it was definitely a cheat day.
539
00:19:22,450 --> 00:19:23,618
You froze your slip of paper,
540
00:19:23,702 --> 00:19:24,952
so that when you pulled the name,
541
00:19:25,036 --> 00:19:26,912
all you had to do was find the cold one.
542
00:19:26,996 --> 00:19:28,289
So.
543
00:19:28,373 --> 00:19:29,372
You thought the way I cheated
544
00:19:29,456 --> 00:19:30,999
was so cool, you gave me the car?
545
00:19:31,083 --> 00:19:32,667
Yeah, but also while I
was watching those tapes,
546
00:19:32,751 --> 00:19:34,502
I noticed all the nice
crap you do for people.
547
00:19:34,586 --> 00:19:35,961
You got Gina a cushion for her chair.
548
00:19:36,045 --> 00:19:37,838
You let Charles show you 130 pictures
549
00:19:37,922 --> 00:19:39,298
of Nikolaj brushing his teeth.
550
00:19:39,382 --> 00:19:40,800
You Heimlich'd Scully twice.
551
00:19:41,342 --> 00:19:43,217
On the same peanut.
I also solved a murder.
552
00:19:43,301 --> 00:19:45,595
Yeah, we all solve murders, but you,
553
00:19:45,971 --> 00:19:47,805
you let Hitchcock borrow
a pair of your socks,
554
00:19:47,889 --> 00:19:49,307
because his somehow disintegrated.
555
00:19:49,391 --> 00:19:51,391
Anyway, I'm sorry I
guilted you in the first place.
556
00:19:51,475 --> 00:19:53,561
You deserve that car. Thanks, Diaz.
557
00:19:54,520 --> 00:19:56,271
How did you get Hitchcock
and Scully to agree to this?
558
00:19:56,355 --> 00:19:58,481
I washed their car and
told them it was a new one.
559
00:19:58,565 --> 00:20:00,165
They're napping in it right now.
560
00:20:00,275 --> 00:20:01,359
Smart!
561
00:20:02,485 --> 00:20:05,320
Hello, Captain Holt.
Ah, Captain Crawford.
562
00:20:05,404 --> 00:20:06,571
To what do I owe the pleasure?
563
00:20:06,655 --> 00:20:08,365
Captain Crawford is here to see you.
564
00:20:08,449 --> 00:20:10,533
Thank you, Gina.
565
00:20:10,867 --> 00:20:13,952
So, it would seem that we
have become frenemies.
566
00:20:14,036 --> 00:20:16,288
Do you know what that means?
Are you trying to imply
567
00:20:16,372 --> 00:20:18,289
that I'm too old to
understand a portmanteau?
568
00:20:18,373 --> 00:20:22,085
I am not, but I am too
dignified to use one.
569
00:20:22,169 --> 00:20:24,252
Friend-enemy. I just wanted to thank you,
570
00:20:24,336 --> 00:20:26,713
for your brave speech.
The mayor's office has replaced
571
00:20:26,797 --> 00:20:29,591
the selection committee
with a less biased one, so…
572
00:20:29,675 --> 00:20:31,550
Feel free to start calling
me commissioner now.
573
00:20:31,634 --> 00:20:33,219
The only time I plan on calling you
574
00:20:33,303 --> 00:20:34,303
is to hear you concede.
575
00:20:34,387 --> 00:20:35,680
It's going to be hard to hear anything
576
00:20:35,764 --> 00:20:37,264
once I've crushed you into a fine powder.
577
00:20:37,348 --> 00:20:40,392
A fine powder that will
choke you until you die.
578
00:20:40,768 --> 00:20:42,352
May the better candidate win.
579
00:20:43,353 --> 00:20:44,938
She will.
580
00:20:47,064 --> 00:20:48,566
Captain Crawford left.
581
00:20:50,151 --> 00:20:51,318
So, we brought her in this morning,
582
00:20:51,402 --> 00:20:52,902
and she confessed immediately.
583
00:20:52,986 --> 00:20:55,780
Hi, Vin, I love you!
Did you see my fires?
584
00:20:55,864 --> 00:20:57,281
Turned out, she was writing something.
585
00:20:57,365 --> 00:21:00,367
Specifically, "Marry
me or else I will kill you.
586
00:21:00,451 --> 00:21:01,952
"Yours forever, Helen Gorbelson."
587
00:21:02,036 --> 00:21:04,955
Wow, that's so many fires. So many fires.
588
00:21:05,372 --> 00:21:07,248
Thank you for catching her.
With a brilliant puzzling mind
589
00:21:07,332 --> 00:21:09,291
like yours on the case, it
was only a matter of time.
590
00:21:09,375 --> 00:21:10,752
Actually, Jake solved it.
591
00:21:11,085 --> 00:21:12,503
He's kind of a genius with this stuff.
592
00:21:12,587 --> 00:21:14,045
Oh, thank you, then.
593
00:21:14,129 --> 00:21:15,171
Couldn't have done it without your help.
594
00:21:15,255 --> 00:21:16,464
So I guess that's that.
595
00:21:16,548 --> 00:21:19,217
I should probably run if I'm going to
make it to the Javits Center by 4:00.
596
00:21:19,301 --> 00:21:21,510
They're making a mold of me
for the upcoming Bodies Exhibit.
597
00:21:21,594 --> 00:21:23,804
As they should, your body is great.
598
00:21:23,888 --> 00:21:25,431
And that's okay. Thanks, man.
599
00:21:25,515 --> 00:21:27,223
You should join me for
a puzzle night sometime.
600
00:21:27,307 --> 00:21:28,558
-Oh.
-BOYLE: No!
601
00:21:28,642 --> 00:21:30,393
Jake is taken. He already has a friend.
602
00:21:30,477 --> 00:21:32,061
Hang out offer declined.
603
00:21:32,145 --> 00:21:34,495
Now let's strut your
centerfold ass out of here.