1
00:00:05,005 --> 00:00:06,715
Gooooood morning, Mrs. Howard.
2
00:00:06,715 --> 00:00:08,591
I mean "good morning."
I know you told me
3
00:00:08,675 --> 00:00:11,386
not to elongate my vowels
before we're in school.
4
00:00:11,386 --> 00:00:13,972
- Good morning, Janine.
- Good morning. So --
5
00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:16,057
- Ms. Howard?
- Yes?
6
00:00:16,141 --> 00:00:19,686
Ms. Howard! It is you! Yo!
7
00:00:19,686 --> 00:00:22,105
I would have thought
you would have retired by now!
8
00:00:22,105 --> 00:00:24,190
Yo, I just dropped off
my nephew and --
9
00:00:24,274 --> 00:00:26,151
Yo, you was always
my favorite teacher,
10
00:00:26,151 --> 00:00:27,777
and I never got a chance
to thank you
11
00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:29,738
for everything you did for me
back in kindergarten.
12
00:00:29,738 --> 00:00:32,741
Aw, sweetheart, you don't
have to thank me for that.
13
00:00:32,741 --> 00:00:33,867
You did this.
14
00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:35,827
Of course
I need to thank you!
15
00:00:35,827 --> 00:00:38,163
Before I was in your class,
everyone would have been like,
16
00:00:38,163 --> 00:00:40,665
"Oh, he's gon' be the one
that needs to be secured."
17
00:00:40,749 --> 00:00:43,501
But thanks to you,
I'm out here securing.
18
00:00:43,585 --> 00:00:48,214
Well, I am very proud of you.
19
00:00:48,298 --> 00:00:49,841
By the way, how is your mother?
20
00:00:49,841 --> 00:00:52,469
Well, that's complicated,
but it's gon' mean so much
21
00:00:52,469 --> 00:00:54,637
to my moms that
Ms. Howard asked after her.
22
00:00:54,721 --> 00:00:57,098
Well, sweetheart,
it was so good to see you,
23
00:00:57,182 --> 00:00:59,351
and have a great
rest of your day.
24
00:00:59,351 --> 00:01:00,560
- You, too, Ms. Howard.
- All right.
25
00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:01,811
- You too.
- Bye.
26
00:01:01,895 --> 00:01:04,064
Bye.
27
00:01:04,064 --> 00:01:07,192
See, Mrs. Howard?
That is why we do this.
28
00:01:07,192 --> 00:01:08,693
Mold those young minds.
29
00:01:08,777 --> 00:01:11,613
Just create new lives, make
those connections. That --
30
00:01:11,613 --> 00:01:14,949
Sweetheart, I have no idea
who that young man was.
31
00:01:15,033 --> 00:01:16,451
Morning.
32
00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:36,012
Well, it looks like a classic
Schemmenti good mood day.
33
00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:38,139
You know it!
I got my favorite parking spot,
34
00:01:38,223 --> 00:01:40,183
my macchiato is on point,
35
00:01:40,183 --> 00:01:42,060
and my neighbor
finally found her cat,
36
00:01:42,060 --> 00:01:44,354
so no more hearing her cry
through the walls.
37
00:01:44,354 --> 00:01:46,815
Jacob, are you ready?
38
00:01:46,815 --> 00:01:48,566
I am not just ready,
39
00:01:48,650 --> 00:01:50,402
- I am set and go.
- Yes.
40
00:01:50,402 --> 00:01:52,278
Ready for what? What's going on?
41
00:01:52,362 --> 00:01:54,114
We have this little tradition
where we read
42
00:01:54,114 --> 00:01:56,074
our Grades for Teachers
reviews out loud
43
00:01:56,074 --> 00:01:57,492
when a new one comes in.
44
00:01:57,492 --> 00:01:59,828
Mine are always
just incredibly flattering.
45
00:01:59,828 --> 00:02:01,413
There's a Yelp for teachers?
46
00:02:01,413 --> 00:02:03,081
Yeah. Do you want me
to help you set up a page?
47
00:02:03,081 --> 00:02:04,666
Because as it says here,
48
00:02:04,666 --> 00:02:07,836
I am excellent at explaining
complicated ideas.
49
00:02:07,836 --> 00:02:10,213
Oh, no, thanks.
That just sounds bad.
50
00:02:10,213 --> 00:02:11,589
Hmm.
51
00:02:11,673 --> 00:02:13,258
Oh -- Oh, dang. Found a new one.
52
00:02:13,258 --> 00:02:15,301
- Okay, okay.
- Mm-hmm.
53
00:02:17,095 --> 00:02:18,221
What's wrong?
54
00:02:18,221 --> 00:02:19,597
Uh, it's -- it's nothing.
55
00:02:19,681 --> 00:02:22,100
I just got a C-minus review,
56
00:02:22,100 --> 00:02:24,978
which will bring down
my overall average
57
00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:27,731
and
tarnish my reputation forever.
58
00:02:27,731 --> 00:02:29,482
You know? It's like --
It's no big deal, though.
59
00:02:29,566 --> 00:02:31,192
Well, if traditions
were always easy,
60
00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:32,235
everyone would have them.
61
00:02:32,235 --> 00:02:33,778
Everyone does.
62
00:02:33,862 --> 00:02:36,448
"Nice but lacks experience
63
00:02:36,448 --> 00:02:39,034
compared to the other
second-grade teacher at Abbott."
64
00:02:39,034 --> 00:02:41,953
Hey! That's me. The other
second-grade teacher at Abbott.
65
00:02:43,038 --> 00:02:45,331
This isn't that bad.
One of my reviews was so rude,
66
00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:47,250
the superintendent had to
come check on me at home.
67
00:02:47,250 --> 00:02:49,711
Yeah, well, that's you, though.
I don't get bad reviews.
68
00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:51,129
You just did.
69
00:02:51,129 --> 00:02:52,797
Girl, please, stop.
70
00:02:52,881 --> 00:02:54,299
You're gonna make me
spit my coffee out.
71
00:02:54,299 --> 00:02:56,885
Okay, look, ignore this. Reviews
on a poorly designed website
72
00:02:56,885 --> 00:02:58,887
do not determine
what kind of teacher you are.
73
00:02:58,887 --> 00:03:00,638
Yeah, no.
No, I just can't believe
74
00:03:00,722 --> 00:03:03,350
the entire world can read
that I'm a bad teacher.
75
00:03:03,350 --> 00:03:05,810
Hey, kid, listen.
There's nothing wrong
76
00:03:05,894 --> 00:03:07,354
with having some room
for improvement.
77
00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:09,022
Just take it from me...
78
00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:11,775
the other, better, more
experienced teacher at Abbott.
79
00:03:14,486 --> 00:03:17,405
Melissa plays a lot. She jokes.
80
00:03:17,489 --> 00:03:19,032
You know? She's good at it.
81
00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:21,910
Just another thing
she's better at than me,
82
00:03:21,910 --> 00:03:24,537
according to the reviews.
83
00:03:24,621 --> 00:03:27,332
She's a regular Lucille Ball.
84
00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:31,044
Oh, hey, man. Can you tell me
where I can find the mailboxes?
85
00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:32,879
- Oh, I'll show you.
- No, you can just tell me.
86
00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:34,923
No, no, it's good. It's fine.
We can walk together.
87
00:03:34,923 --> 00:03:37,676
Ooh, speaking of mail,
can we talk USPS?
88
00:03:37,676 --> 00:03:39,552
Have you heard of
informed delivery?
89
00:03:39,636 --> 00:03:41,846
What up, ol' curly head
Arthur from PBS looking boy?
90
00:03:42,889 --> 00:03:44,599
And good morning to you, Raheem.
91
00:03:44,683 --> 00:03:45,892
You let them talk to you
like that?
92
00:03:45,892 --> 00:03:48,520
Well, correct me if I'm wrong,
but the boys and I are bonding
93
00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:50,689
in the tradition
of playing the dozens.
94
00:03:50,689 --> 00:03:51,898
It's also called roasting.
95
00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:54,109
Also called, uh,
blazing, frying.
96
00:03:54,109 --> 00:03:56,069
Hmm. Lot of
cooking terminology.
97
00:03:56,069 --> 00:03:57,612
Look, man.
I'm from Baltimore, okay?
98
00:03:57,696 --> 00:03:59,239
All I know is when
somebody roasts you,
99
00:03:59,239 --> 00:04:01,116
you got to roast them back.
100
00:04:01,116 --> 00:04:02,242
Our teachers used to roast us.
101
00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:04,035
If they didn't,
we wouldn't have respected them.
102
00:04:04,119 --> 00:04:05,120
You're just getting clowned.
103
00:04:05,120 --> 00:04:07,872
Of course I'm being clowned,
okay?
104
00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:09,124
I don't know how to roast.
105
00:04:09,124 --> 00:04:10,291
It's not that hard.
106
00:04:10,375 --> 00:04:12,544
You just kind of have to take
what people give you, like...
107
00:04:12,544 --> 00:04:15,714
you ol' mothball-
sweater-vest-looking boy.
108
00:04:15,714 --> 00:04:18,174
Hmm. Simple yet cutting.
109
00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:20,385
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay. Thank you.
110
00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:22,470
I thought you had to bring
way more to the table.
111
00:04:22,554 --> 00:04:24,139
In the Dean Martin
celebrity roasts --
112
00:04:24,139 --> 00:04:26,057
Where are the mailboxes?
113
00:04:26,141 --> 00:04:28,601
Oh. Yeah. Come on.
114
00:04:28,685 --> 00:04:30,186
All right. Attendance time.
115
00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:33,189
So, raise your hand
if you're not here.
116
00:04:35,567 --> 00:04:37,068
All right.
So Nicole's not here.
117
00:04:38,236 --> 00:04:40,864
Janine, come to my office.
118
00:04:40,864 --> 00:04:42,365
- Ooh!
- Ooh!
119
00:04:42,449 --> 00:04:44,367
All right, everybody,
uh, settle down.
120
00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:47,912
Okay, everyone's who's not here,
please be good, all right?
121
00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:49,122
I'll be right back.
122
00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:51,791
Mm-hmm. She'll be right back.
123
00:04:51,875 --> 00:04:53,793
Can she see me?
124
00:04:56,463 --> 00:04:57,672
Hey, girl.
125
00:04:57,756 --> 00:04:58,882
Hey, Ava.
126
00:04:58,882 --> 00:05:00,550
You know I can't just
leave my classroom
127
00:05:00,550 --> 00:05:02,010
unattended like this, right?
128
00:05:02,010 --> 00:05:03,428
It's five minutes.
It's not like something
129
00:05:03,428 --> 00:05:04,721
could go wrong in five minutes.
130
00:05:04,721 --> 00:05:07,223
A lot can go wrong, actually.
131
00:05:07,307 --> 00:05:09,392
If you say so. Anyway,
one of Melissa's students
132
00:05:09,476 --> 00:05:10,643
will be transferring
into your class.
133
00:05:10,727 --> 00:05:12,854
Really? Why?
134
00:05:12,854 --> 00:05:14,773
Girl, I don't know.
Things happen all day.
135
00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:16,816
Maybe she wants to be closer
to the bathroom.
136
00:05:16,900 --> 00:05:18,109
Maybe she like you more.
137
00:05:18,193 --> 00:05:20,445
Maybe she got some kind
of Meek Mill-Drake feud
138
00:05:20,445 --> 00:05:22,155
going on with one of her
classmates. I don't know.
139
00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:23,656
Maybe she likes me better.
140
00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:25,450
If you really want to know,
you should read her file.
141
00:05:25,450 --> 00:05:27,202
I have them arranged
by sexiest dad.
142
00:05:27,202 --> 00:05:30,205
Her name is Courtney Pierce,
and her daddy is "foine."
143
00:05:30,205 --> 00:05:32,248
No, that's okay.
144
00:05:32,332 --> 00:05:33,792
I don't really like
to read the file.
145
00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:35,210
I like to get to know the child
146
00:05:35,210 --> 00:05:37,003
so I don't have
any preconceived notions.
147
00:05:37,087 --> 00:05:39,756
That's an adorable spin
on choosing to be unprepared.
148
00:05:39,756 --> 00:05:41,966
I wonder how Melissa's doing.
149
00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:44,052
Hope she's not taking this
too hard.
150
00:05:44,052 --> 00:05:46,346
Find out right now.
151
00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:48,682
Melissa, Janine is on her way.
152
00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:50,892
You do know that that's
coming out of all the speakers,
153
00:05:50,892 --> 00:05:52,352
not just a specific
classroom, right?
154
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:53,603
I said you're on your way.
155
00:05:57,065 --> 00:06:00,860
Looking like Ron Weasley
if he was a pick-up artist.
156
00:06:00,944 --> 00:06:03,613
This man look like
he dream in podcasts.
157
00:06:05,824 --> 00:06:07,826
Well, look at you...
158
00:06:07,826 --> 00:06:09,911
ol' blue shirt...
159
00:06:09,911 --> 00:06:11,788
tan pants wearing guy.
160
00:06:14,249 --> 00:06:16,292
With your bright white shoes
161
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:19,337
and the laces all tied up
into a little bow?
162
00:06:19,421 --> 00:06:23,133
Yeah. No way those
are accidentally falling off.
163
00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:27,554
Mr. Vampire Weekend,
that really hurt my feelings.
164
00:06:29,264 --> 00:06:32,058
Oh, God.
165
00:06:32,142 --> 00:06:33,852
Raheem, I am -- I am so sorry.
166
00:06:33,852 --> 00:06:35,270
You should be.
167
00:06:35,270 --> 00:06:37,022
With that
Twilight-shaped mouth!
168
00:06:37,022 --> 00:06:38,690
Ha ha! Got 'im!
169
00:06:38,690 --> 00:06:41,818
That's what we're all wearing.
It's a uniform.
170
00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:43,611
You ain't even observant, dawg.
171
00:06:44,988 --> 00:06:47,282
They say the first year
of teaching is the hardest.
172
00:06:47,282 --> 00:06:49,200
But...
173
00:06:49,284 --> 00:06:51,619
What about the second year?
174
00:06:51,703 --> 00:06:54,372
- Minus $1 equals --
- Hey, Melissa. Hey.
175
00:06:54,456 --> 00:06:55,498
- What?
- Uh, sorry.
176
00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:57,625
I know you talked to Ava,
so this is awkward.
177
00:06:57,709 --> 00:06:59,419
W-Why would it be awkward?
178
00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:03,340
Oh, just the whole your student
preferring me thing.
179
00:07:03,340 --> 00:07:05,467
Oh, yeah, no.
Not awkward at all. Just...
180
00:07:05,467 --> 00:07:07,385
there's a couple things that
you should know about Courtney
181
00:07:07,469 --> 00:07:08,511
before you take her
into your class.
182
00:07:08,595 --> 00:07:10,430
I know you're more experienced
than I am,
183
00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:12,891
but this transfer kind of proves
184
00:07:12,891 --> 00:07:14,768
I've got something special
in my classroom
185
00:07:14,768 --> 00:07:16,895
that's got the kids a-talkin'.
186
00:07:18,688 --> 00:07:21,608
Courtney, come over here, hon.
187
00:07:21,608 --> 00:07:24,069
It's time for you to go with
188
00:07:24,069 --> 00:07:27,072
your very confident new teacher,
Ms. Teagues.
189
00:07:27,072 --> 00:07:29,866
Why don't you go get your stuff?
190
00:07:29,866 --> 00:07:31,451
I'm like the Allen Iverson
of teachers,
191
00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:33,745
and you're like that guy
he stepped over once.
192
00:07:33,745 --> 00:07:36,206
You mean three-time
NBA champion Tyronn Lue?
193
00:07:36,206 --> 00:07:37,957
- That guy?
- Yes, you know basketball,
194
00:07:38,041 --> 00:07:41,961
but my point is,
maybe I'm not a bad teacher.
195
00:07:42,045 --> 00:07:44,172
Maybe you are.
196
00:07:44,172 --> 00:07:45,256
Okay.
197
00:07:45,340 --> 00:07:47,759
Courtney...
198
00:07:47,759 --> 00:07:50,845
I want you to go
and be your wonderful self
199
00:07:50,929 --> 00:07:52,097
with Ms. Teagues, okay?
200
00:07:52,097 --> 00:07:54,224
I have no doubt
that you're gonna have
201
00:07:54,224 --> 00:07:56,393
a great time in her class.
202
00:07:56,393 --> 00:07:58,478
All right.
203
00:07:58,478 --> 00:08:00,021
Have fun.
204
00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:04,192
All right.
205
00:08:04,192 --> 00:08:07,654
Oh, look at you all,
being so well-behaved.
206
00:08:07,654 --> 00:08:09,823
Setting a great example
for our new student.
207
00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:10,990
Hi. I'm Janine.
208
00:08:11,074 --> 00:08:12,867
- Hi, Janine!
- Hi, Janine!
209
00:08:12,951 --> 00:08:15,245
Uh, no. She's not Janine.
Her name is --
210
00:08:15,245 --> 00:08:16,788
My name is Janine Teagues.
211
00:08:16,788 --> 00:08:18,832
- Hi, Janine Teagues!
- Hi, Janine Teagues!
212
00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:19,999
It's not Janine.
213
00:08:20,083 --> 00:08:21,084
Yes, it is.
214
00:08:21,084 --> 00:08:23,253
Courtney?
215
00:08:23,253 --> 00:08:26,089
One of the toughest students
I've ever had.
216
00:08:26,089 --> 00:08:28,758
She's gonna eat Janine alive.
217
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:32,012
Okay, everyone, please stand
for the Pledge of Allegiance.
218
00:08:32,012 --> 00:08:34,597
Except for Andrew,
who is taking a principled stand
219
00:08:34,681 --> 00:08:35,724
against nationalism.
220
00:08:35,724 --> 00:08:37,559
Yes. All right.
221
00:08:37,559 --> 00:08:40,270
Everyone else? I...
222
00:08:40,270 --> 00:08:43,398
I pledge allegiance to the flag
223
00:08:43,398 --> 00:08:46,151
of the United States
of Courtney.
224
00:08:46,151 --> 00:08:49,863
And to the Courtney
for which it stands,
225
00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:54,534
one nation under Courtney, indivisible,
226
00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:57,996
with Courtney
and Courtney for all!
227
00:09:00,498 --> 00:09:02,959
That's right! Nice job.
228
00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:05,003
That's right. Nice job.
229
00:09:05,003 --> 00:09:06,796
Courtney,
go back to your seat.
230
00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:08,173
But I'm done with all my work.
231
00:09:08,173 --> 00:09:09,257
Go.
232
00:09:12,427 --> 00:09:15,221
Your next word is "smooth."
Go, go, go.
233
00:09:18,975 --> 00:09:20,310
Done!
234
00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:24,230
- "Rebble"?
- It's "ra-bell."
235
00:09:27,192 --> 00:09:28,610
Courtney?
236
00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:30,779
Courtney, please stop.
237
00:09:30,779 --> 00:09:31,863
Courtney.
238
00:09:31,863 --> 00:09:34,115
Just --
239
00:09:34,199 --> 00:09:35,950
Hey. Hi. Can I help you?
240
00:09:36,034 --> 00:09:38,411
Yeah, I just stopped by
to see how Courtney's doing.
241
00:09:38,495 --> 00:09:40,997
Oh, yeah, Courtney is thriving.
242
00:09:41,081 --> 00:09:42,874
Whole class is, actually.
243
00:09:42,874 --> 00:09:45,543
She was the missing piece to
our little puzzle of learning.
244
00:09:45,627 --> 00:09:47,128
Oh. That's great to hear.
245
00:09:47,212 --> 00:09:49,047
I'm surprised you're not
having any problems.
246
00:09:49,047 --> 00:09:51,132
Took me a couple of months
to figure out how to keep her
247
00:09:51,216 --> 00:09:52,509
from disrupting the class.
248
00:09:52,509 --> 00:09:54,177
Look at you doing it
in a couple of hours.
249
00:09:54,177 --> 00:09:55,804
I guess you really are
250
00:09:55,804 --> 00:09:58,306
the superior teacher.
251
00:10:04,187 --> 00:10:06,564
I'm teaching a lesson
on gravity.
252
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:08,858
Here's a little secret.
253
00:10:08,942 --> 00:10:10,443
Courtney didn't get transferred
out of my class
254
00:10:10,527 --> 00:10:12,153
'cause I couldn't handle her.
255
00:10:12,237 --> 00:10:13,571
She got her parents
to transfer her
256
00:10:13,655 --> 00:10:17,158
because I'd already caught on
to all her little tricks.
257
00:10:17,242 --> 00:10:18,827
Most of them.
258
00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:21,454
Nobody could have seen
that macaroni thing coming.
259
00:10:21,538 --> 00:10:23,248
So I said,
"I'm not giving you a ride.
260
00:10:23,248 --> 00:10:25,458
I'm 'bout to drop you off
at the airport of life."
261
00:10:25,542 --> 00:10:27,585
Oh, I know that's right.
262
00:10:27,669 --> 00:10:29,295
Hey, ladies. Sorry to interrupt.
263
00:10:29,379 --> 00:10:30,547
Uh, you mentioned earlier
264
00:10:30,547 --> 00:10:32,590
that there was a file
on Courtney Pierce?
265
00:10:32,674 --> 00:10:34,884
Yeah. Thicker than a Snicker.
Heavy like a Chevy.
266
00:10:34,968 --> 00:10:36,219
- Ooh.
- Okay.
267
00:10:36,219 --> 00:10:37,971
Are you having issues
with Courtney?
268
00:10:37,971 --> 00:10:39,764
Ah, I wouldn't say --
269
00:10:39,848 --> 00:10:41,933
She need help.
Look at her.
270
00:10:42,017 --> 00:10:43,184
With that "I need help" face.
271
00:10:43,268 --> 00:10:45,603
Okay, this is not
an "I need help" face.
272
00:10:45,687 --> 00:10:47,856
It is an "I have it
under control" face
273
00:10:47,856 --> 00:10:49,899
and arm and leg and --
274
00:10:49,983 --> 00:10:53,194
And that is good,
because I cannot help you.
275
00:10:53,278 --> 00:10:56,239
You see, Ava and I
have placed a modest wager
276
00:10:56,239 --> 00:10:59,492
on your success with
the whole Courtney situation,
277
00:10:59,576 --> 00:11:01,077
and I will not affect
the outcome.
278
00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,121
Wait. Hold on. You bet on me?
279
00:11:03,121 --> 00:11:05,415
- Well, yeah.
- You guys are using
280
00:11:05,415 --> 00:11:07,333
my performance as a teacher
for entertainment?
281
00:11:07,417 --> 00:11:09,335
- Mm-hmm.
- Mm.
282
00:11:09,419 --> 00:11:12,213
Okay. That's it. You know what?
I'm taking everybody's money.
283
00:11:13,423 --> 00:11:15,759
Janine, you do know
284
00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:17,719
that that is not
how bets work, right?
285
00:11:20,388 --> 00:11:22,474
Ava, I'm gonna need
to see that file.
286
00:11:22,474 --> 00:11:25,310
Okay. You don't have to say it
all determined.
287
00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:26,770
Nobody's stopping you
from seeing the file.
288
00:11:26,770 --> 00:11:29,522
I offered it to you yesterday.
Just go in the office and look.
289
00:11:30,482 --> 00:11:31,483
Okay.
290
00:11:36,446 --> 00:11:37,530
Hey. How's it going?
291
00:11:37,614 --> 00:11:39,199
It's -- Yeah.
292
00:11:55,090 --> 00:11:57,133
"Psychological warfare"?
293
00:11:57,217 --> 00:11:59,969
"Could make a good
cult leader someday.
294
00:12:00,053 --> 00:12:01,763
Melissa Schemmenti."
295
00:12:01,763 --> 00:12:05,892
Well, I found Courtney's file,
and it is substantial.
296
00:12:05,892 --> 00:12:08,478
Cannot believe Melissa
didn't tell me any of this.
297
00:12:08,478 --> 00:12:11,106
But now that I'm informed,
I can handle it.
298
00:12:11,106 --> 00:12:13,108
I'm just gonna have to
communicate to Courtney
299
00:12:13,108 --> 00:12:15,777
that this behavior isn't okay.
300
00:12:15,777 --> 00:12:19,155
I bet no one's ever really tried
to talk to her, you know?
301
00:12:19,239 --> 00:12:20,448
Meet her where she's at.
302
00:12:25,620 --> 00:12:27,372
Juice?
303
00:12:28,373 --> 00:12:30,166
Apple juice? Really?
304
00:12:31,459 --> 00:12:33,795
Okay. Um...
305
00:12:33,795 --> 00:12:36,548
Courtney, did you know
the emotional center
306
00:12:36,548 --> 00:12:39,509
isn't actually in the heart
but in the brain?
307
00:12:39,509 --> 00:12:41,386
- Pass.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
308
00:12:41,386 --> 00:12:43,763
Okay. Sit down.
Hold on. All right.
309
00:12:43,847 --> 00:12:47,726
You're a leader, Courtney,
and maybe that's something
310
00:12:47,726 --> 00:12:50,895
your other teachers
didn't see about you, but I do.
311
00:12:50,979 --> 00:12:54,649
I know that when you tie your
classmates' shoelaces together
312
00:12:54,733 --> 00:12:56,735
and tell them to dance,
313
00:12:56,735 --> 00:12:58,737
you're just looking
for affirmation.
314
00:12:58,737 --> 00:13:01,573
And, Courtney,
I will affirm you.
315
00:13:01,573 --> 00:13:04,826
We will sit down together,
maybe do a puzzle --
316
00:13:04,826 --> 00:13:07,746
I bet you love puzzles
as much as I do --
317
00:13:07,746 --> 00:13:11,332
and just work through
some of those feelings together.
318
00:13:12,083 --> 00:13:14,794
Okay.
319
00:13:24,220 --> 00:13:26,056
I mean...
320
00:13:29,684 --> 00:13:31,728
So I reached out to her.
You know? Sat her down.
321
00:13:31,728 --> 00:13:33,063
Because at the end of the day,
322
00:13:33,063 --> 00:13:34,397
teaching is just about communicating,
323
00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:36,524
and that's something I live by.
324
00:13:36,608 --> 00:13:37,859
I don't want to compare,
but, like...
325
00:13:37,859 --> 00:13:41,905
Barbara, have you ever been
roasted by your students?
326
00:13:41,905 --> 00:13:43,656
One, they're 5.
327
00:13:43,740 --> 00:13:45,241
Two, they respect me.
328
00:13:45,325 --> 00:13:47,952
Three, what would they even say?
329
00:13:48,036 --> 00:13:50,955
Mm.
330
00:13:51,039 --> 00:13:53,416
Hey. I need to talk.
Like to a friend.
331
00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:56,628
You know how sometimes when
you're being chased by a dog
332
00:13:56,628 --> 00:13:57,962
and you can't tell
if it's playing
333
00:13:58,046 --> 00:13:59,506
or if it's trying to bite you?
334
00:13:59,506 --> 00:14:00,924
- No.
- But at the same time,
335
00:14:00,924 --> 00:14:02,300
you don't want to stop running,
336
00:14:02,384 --> 00:14:04,344
because if it isn't playing,
you're gonna get bit?
337
00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:06,513
Look, I tried
roasting my students back,
338
00:14:06,513 --> 00:14:07,597
and it didn't work.
339
00:14:07,681 --> 00:14:11,017
It got way worse
and oddly specific.
340
00:14:11,101 --> 00:14:12,394
Come on. It couldn't
have been that bad.
341
00:14:12,394 --> 00:14:15,105
They called me "HuffPo-reading
gay Pete Buttigieg,"
342
00:14:15,105 --> 00:14:18,149
which is repetitive
and insulting.
343
00:14:18,233 --> 00:14:19,859
As if I would read a word
of Huffington Post
344
00:14:19,943 --> 00:14:21,277
after Arianna stepped down.
345
00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:23,071
You may just have to
take the L on this one, man.
346
00:14:23,071 --> 00:14:24,989
I mean, you can't really
beat them at their own game.
347
00:14:25,073 --> 00:14:28,076
It's like them
challenging you to...
348
00:14:28,076 --> 00:14:29,577
Dungeons & Dragons.
349
00:14:30,662 --> 00:14:32,205
You can't really
challenge someone to D&D.
350
00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:34,124
It's more like a cooperative
game that's all about
351
00:14:34,124 --> 00:14:35,792
the shared experience
rather than winning.
352
00:14:37,669 --> 00:14:41,881
Thank you, you ol' good
friendship having man.
353
00:14:46,177 --> 00:14:47,220
Is everything okay?
354
00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:48,722
Oh, you tell me.
355
00:14:48,722 --> 00:14:50,724
You got a little sleepyhead
over there.
356
00:14:52,350 --> 00:14:53,768
Do you want to know what I do
357
00:14:53,852 --> 00:14:55,645
when a kid falls asleep
in my class?
358
00:14:55,729 --> 00:14:57,564
- Sure.
- Nothing.
359
00:14:57,564 --> 00:14:58,857
'Cause it doesn't happen.
360
00:14:58,857 --> 00:15:00,108
I keep my kids engaged.
361
00:15:00,108 --> 00:15:01,943
Anyway, do you have a second
362
00:15:02,027 --> 00:15:04,237
for me to show you something
regarding Courtney?
363
00:15:06,448 --> 00:15:07,741
All right, my little eagles.
364
00:15:07,741 --> 00:15:10,285
We're gonna take quiet time
a bit early, okay?
365
00:15:10,285 --> 00:15:12,454
Yes, Ms. Schemmenti.
366
00:15:12,454 --> 00:15:14,289
I know you didn't
pull me out of class
367
00:15:14,289 --> 00:15:15,582
just so you could brag.
368
00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:17,167
No, of course not.
369
00:15:21,087 --> 00:15:23,131
Courtney's teaching us
a new word.
370
00:15:28,803 --> 00:15:30,138
Courtney!
371
00:15:31,348 --> 00:15:33,433
Look away, y'all.
372
00:15:36,311 --> 00:15:38,021
All right, guys,
we're gonna go into
373
00:15:38,021 --> 00:15:40,190
Ms. Schemmenti's class
for a little bit
374
00:15:40,190 --> 00:15:42,192
while Mr. Johnson
cleans the board
375
00:15:42,192 --> 00:15:45,653
because Courtney decided
to use permanent marker
376
00:15:45,737 --> 00:15:47,947
even though dry-erase
was right there.
377
00:15:48,031 --> 00:15:50,784
But she knew that.
She knew that.
378
00:15:50,784 --> 00:15:52,369
I heard there's a bet going.
379
00:15:52,369 --> 00:15:54,371
Is it too late for me
to get in on the action?
380
00:15:59,626 --> 00:16:01,544
I went from having one teacher
to two.
381
00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:02,754
Ain't that some
382
00:16:02,754 --> 00:16:04,339
- Courtney!
- Courtney!
383
00:16:04,339 --> 00:16:06,216
You know, I'm glad
she's in your class now
384
00:16:06,216 --> 00:16:08,510
so you two can throw
your little tantrums together.
385
00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:11,096
I'm sorry.
Was it not a tantrum
386
00:16:11,096 --> 00:16:13,098
when you sent Courtney
to my class
387
00:16:13,098 --> 00:16:15,016
without warning me
about her behavioral issues?
388
00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:17,018
Yes, I saw your notes
in her file.
389
00:16:17,102 --> 00:16:18,812
I did try to warn you,
ya gabbadost,
390
00:16:18,812 --> 00:16:20,397
but you got too big
for your britches
391
00:16:20,397 --> 00:16:22,357
and you didn't want to listen.
392
00:16:22,357 --> 00:16:24,859
Well, maybe if you hadn't been
making fun of me yesterday,
393
00:16:24,943 --> 00:16:26,403
I wouldn't have
gotten defensive.
394
00:16:26,403 --> 00:16:29,030
Janine, I was goofing.
395
00:16:29,114 --> 00:16:30,657
Unlike when you called me
a bad teacher,
396
00:16:30,657 --> 00:16:32,701
something I would never
call you.
397
00:16:33,576 --> 00:16:35,537
You know, I-I know
that review hit you hard,
398
00:16:35,537 --> 00:16:36,913
but I didn't deserve that.
399
00:16:40,667 --> 00:16:42,085
Okay.
400
00:16:42,085 --> 00:16:46,047
I'm sorry.
You're right. You're right.
401
00:16:46,131 --> 00:16:48,508
That review really,
really hurt my feelings,
402
00:16:48,508 --> 00:16:50,260
and I took it out on you.
403
00:16:50,260 --> 00:16:51,761
It wasn't even that bad.
404
00:16:51,845 --> 00:16:53,513
It just said
you were less experienced.
405
00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:55,932
Listen, if you go look
at the Facebook reviews
406
00:16:56,016 --> 00:16:57,851
of my cousin Rocco's
hoagie shop, you would think
407
00:16:57,851 --> 00:17:00,395
the man sold food poisoning.
408
00:17:00,395 --> 00:17:02,731
But he's gonna keep
making hoagies.
409
00:17:02,731 --> 00:17:06,067
You know why?
Most people love them.
410
00:17:06,151 --> 00:17:07,694
You got to keep
making hoagies.
411
00:17:09,529 --> 00:17:12,073
Now, what are we gonna do
about this one?
412
00:17:15,702 --> 00:17:18,204
Thank you for your business.
413
00:17:18,288 --> 00:17:19,664
Ol' I should have been a hooper,
414
00:17:19,748 --> 00:17:21,583
but basketball didn't exist
lookin' boy.
415
00:17:22,751 --> 00:17:24,461
1800s Slenderman in the face.
416
00:17:24,461 --> 00:17:26,379
Okay, while these are hilarious,
417
00:17:26,463 --> 00:17:29,424
let's try and incorporate some
of the lessons into the roast.
418
00:17:29,424 --> 00:17:32,552
Ol' bullet in the head
at Ford's Theatre lookin' boy.
419
00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:35,555
My mans got ain't been sleeping
four score and seven years ago
420
00:17:35,555 --> 00:17:37,015
bags all up under his eyes.
421
00:17:37,015 --> 00:17:38,933
Abe Lincoln.
I'm Abe Lincoln, Mr. Hill.
422
00:17:39,017 --> 00:17:41,353
Yes, yes! Good work, team!
423
00:17:45,648 --> 00:17:49,652
Yeah, I guess, like, thumbs up
is kind of our thing now.
424
00:17:49,736 --> 00:17:51,279
Bye. Don't forget your homework.
425
00:17:51,363 --> 00:17:52,489
- Ms. Schemmenti.
- Yes?
426
00:17:52,489 --> 00:17:53,990
Courtney called me stupid.
427
00:17:54,074 --> 00:17:57,077
No, I didn't. I called you
"stupendous," you idiot!
428
00:17:57,077 --> 00:17:58,661
- Courtney!
- You know what?
429
00:17:58,745 --> 00:18:00,205
I'm just gonna go home
and take a nap,
430
00:18:00,205 --> 00:18:02,165
'cause I'm utterly depleted.
431
00:18:02,165 --> 00:18:03,708
What'd she say?
432
00:18:03,792 --> 00:18:05,251
One thing I will say --
433
00:18:05,335 --> 00:18:07,379
that girl has
a fairly advanced vocabulary.
434
00:18:07,379 --> 00:18:09,297
She corrected my math
last week.
435
00:18:09,381 --> 00:18:10,507
She threw a stapler first,
436
00:18:10,507 --> 00:18:12,258
but she was right
about the math.
437
00:18:12,342 --> 00:18:13,593
You know, when I was
going through Part 2
438
00:18:13,677 --> 00:18:15,387
of Courtney's file earlier,
439
00:18:15,387 --> 00:18:17,722
I realized her grades
have never dropped.
440
00:18:17,806 --> 00:18:18,890
- Mnh-mnh.
- And usually when a kid
441
00:18:18,890 --> 00:18:22,018
is acting out like that,
you see it in their performance.
442
00:18:22,102 --> 00:18:23,937
Yeah.
That's what makes it tough.
443
00:18:23,937 --> 00:18:25,897
Hard to discipline a kid
who's getting straight A's.
444
00:18:27,982 --> 00:18:29,484
All right.
445
00:18:29,484 --> 00:18:31,111
So, what if we rewarded her?
446
00:18:33,029 --> 00:18:35,657
You might be onto something
there, rookie.
447
00:18:35,657 --> 00:18:38,243
Okay, so if B makes it block,
448
00:18:38,243 --> 00:18:40,704
then C makes it what?
449
00:18:40,704 --> 00:18:42,622
Uh, not quite. Try again.
450
00:18:43,581 --> 00:18:46,167
There you go. Good job.
451
00:18:46,251 --> 00:18:49,004
Wow.
You think you know someone.
452
00:18:49,004 --> 00:18:50,922
And then they cheat on you
with their thumb.
453
00:18:53,299 --> 00:18:56,386
Ol' Siskel & Ebert
two thumbs up lookin' ass boy.
454
00:18:56,386 --> 00:18:57,470
Okay.
455
00:18:58,596 --> 00:19:00,557
You want to bump the
Puzzles kid up a grade?
456
00:19:00,557 --> 00:19:02,600
Yes.
After talking to Melissa
457
00:19:02,684 --> 00:19:04,894
about how she was able
to keep Courtney in line,
458
00:19:04,978 --> 00:19:06,771
we realized
the only thing that works
459
00:19:06,855 --> 00:19:08,273
is when she feels challenged.
460
00:19:08,273 --> 00:19:09,357
Are you sure
you're not just trying
461
00:19:09,441 --> 00:19:10,817
to dump Courtney
on another teacher?
462
00:19:10,817 --> 00:19:13,903
No, no, no. I feel that with
a more challenging workload,
463
00:19:13,987 --> 00:19:16,448
Courtney will be much,
much easier to handle,
464
00:19:16,448 --> 00:19:18,700
and she won't have time
to distract her classmates.
465
00:19:18,700 --> 00:19:19,784
Mm-hmm.
466
00:19:19,868 --> 00:19:22,203
Why does that sound so familiar?
467
00:19:22,287 --> 00:19:23,830
Oh. Hold up.
468
00:19:25,206 --> 00:19:27,167
Part 3?
469
00:19:27,167 --> 00:19:29,127
My bad, y'all. She was
supposed to skip second grade,
470
00:19:29,127 --> 00:19:30,879
but they told me
during Essence Fest.
471
00:19:30,879 --> 00:19:32,464
I missed a lot of paperwork
during that month.
472
00:19:32,464 --> 00:19:34,090
Isn't Essence Fest
just a weekend?
473
00:19:34,174 --> 00:19:36,801
Maybe for y'all.
474
00:19:38,136 --> 00:19:40,305
Oh, hey, Barbara!
Nothing to see here.
475
00:19:40,305 --> 00:19:43,600
Just Janine going on and on
about what a handful Courtney is
476
00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:46,519
and how she can't handle
the situation at all.
477
00:19:46,603 --> 00:19:47,979
Is that so?
478
00:19:49,189 --> 00:19:51,149
Fine.
479
00:19:51,149 --> 00:19:53,068
I guess technically
Janine succeeded.
480
00:19:53,068 --> 00:19:56,363
She figured out that Courtney
needs to be bumped up a grade.
481
00:19:56,363 --> 00:19:58,073
Guess you win the bet.
482
00:19:58,073 --> 00:19:59,157
Hmm.
483
00:20:00,367 --> 00:20:02,327
Barbara?
484
00:20:02,327 --> 00:20:03,661
You believed in me?
485
00:20:03,745 --> 00:20:06,289
Janine, why don't you go
handle this transfer
486
00:20:06,373 --> 00:20:08,583
so that your class
isn't any more disrupted
487
00:20:08,583 --> 00:20:10,210
than it already has been?
488
00:20:11,378 --> 00:20:12,671
Okay.
489
00:20:14,422 --> 00:20:15,590
Mm.
490
00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:18,677
It's a heart.
491
00:20:18,677 --> 00:20:21,763
I learned that from Courtney.
492
00:20:21,763 --> 00:20:24,891
I thought Barbara bet
against me, but she didn't.
493
00:20:24,891 --> 00:20:27,143
She actually thinks
I'm a great teacher.
494
00:20:27,227 --> 00:20:29,938
Maybe even better than --
495
00:20:29,938 --> 00:20:33,274
Courtney!
Hey, Courtney! What, get --
496
00:20:33,358 --> 00:20:36,695
How'd you get back
in the building?! Courtney!
497
00:20:42,492 --> 00:20:44,869
It's barely wet.
What you, the CDC?
498
00:20:44,953 --> 00:20:49,082
I will expect some non-brassiere
money from you by tomorrow
499
00:20:49,082 --> 00:20:50,375
because, Ava...
500
00:20:50,375 --> 00:20:51,459
Huh?
501
00:20:52,127 --> 00:20:55,255
You do not want to owe me money.
502
00:20:56,631 --> 00:20:57,882
Hmm.
503
00:21:02,512 --> 00:21:04,889
Ohh. Damn!
504
00:21:04,973 --> 00:21:06,933
Mm.
505
00:21:10,645 --> 00:21:12,397
What?
506
00:21:14,566 --> 00:21:17,485
Captions by VITAC --