1 00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:36,750 (歡迎蒞臨 班吉和艾米莉亞的彩排晚宴) 2 00:00:42,500 --> 00:00:46,041 溫柏里太太 你想給兒子們一些建議嗎? 3 00:00:46,125 --> 00:00:47,333 -他們… -我們為什麼都要… 4 00:00:47,666 --> 00:00:49,416 …都是我畢生摯愛 5 00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:51,375 我快失去你了 6 00:00:51,458 --> 00:00:52,958 我已經失去一個了 7 00:00:53,041 --> 00:00:56,041 但這個絕對不行,永遠不能結婚 8 00:00:56,125 --> 00:00:57,750 -放心 -留在家裡 9 00:00:57,833 --> 00:00:59,583 愛抱怨的尿床屁孩找不到對象啦 10 00:00:59,666 --> 00:01:00,708 老哥,煩耶,閃啦 11 00:01:00,791 --> 00:01:03,958 -我開玩笑的,湯瑪斯 -拜託,他真的會尿床啊 12 00:01:04,041 --> 00:01:06,666 -融洽點,假裝感情好 -我好像四歲小孩 13 00:01:08,291 --> 00:01:10,875 -真是的 -好,夠好了 14 00:01:27,458 --> 00:01:28,375 嗨,艾米莉亞 15 00:01:28,458 --> 00:01:30,208 -你是梅莉特吧? -沒錯 16 00:01:30,291 --> 00:01:32,083 伴娘誠摯為你效勞 17 00:01:32,166 --> 00:01:36,041 今天是你跟班吉共度一生的第一天 18 00:01:36,125 --> 00:01:38,041 我就是這麼愛你 19 00:01:39,041 --> 00:01:40,875 -嗨,未來的我們 -嗨 20 00:01:40,958 --> 00:01:42,666 我們可能會一起看這段影片 21 00:01:42,750 --> 00:01:45,416 -無庸置疑 -跟我們擠在沙發上看 22 00:01:45,500 --> 00:01:47,958 肉麻,我要去客房了 23 00:01:48,041 --> 00:01:51,458 -那我那時候在哪裡? -你在照顧我們的七個小孩 24 00:01:51,541 --> 00:01:53,041 這是伴郎的工作嗎? 25 00:01:53,125 --> 00:01:53,958 是十個 26 00:01:54,041 --> 00:01:55,041 -十個? -11個? 27 00:01:55,125 --> 00:01:56,541 六個,六個小孩一隻狗? 28 00:01:56,625 --> 00:01:58,541 六個小孩一隻狗?一言為定 29 00:01:58,625 --> 00:02:00,875 希望你今晚嗨翻天,老弟 30 00:02:00,958 --> 00:02:03,083 因為明天你就正式死會了 31 00:02:03,166 --> 00:02:04,000 -沒錯 -對 32 00:02:04,083 --> 00:02:07,666 她也是,她的本益比值更高 33 00:02:07,750 --> 00:02:09,583 你知道自己在胡說什麼嗎? 34 00:02:09,666 --> 00:02:11,500 跟你結婚是我應該 35 00:02:11,583 --> 00:02:12,458 敬未來 36 00:02:12,541 --> 00:02:13,791 -敬未來 -敬未來 37 00:02:13,875 --> 00:02:16,416 -敬大家 -嘿,戈莎,去忙你的好嗎? 38 00:02:16,500 --> 00:02:19,333 -威爾先生,你還未成年 -嘿 39 00:02:19,416 --> 00:02:20,416 但是我成年了 40 00:02:21,041 --> 00:02:22,625 -敬你,戈莎 -敬你,戈莎 41 00:02:22,708 --> 00:02:24,291 伊莎貝爾,你到了 42 00:02:24,375 --> 00:02:25,583 -旅途順利嗎? -葛麗 43 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:30,083 我的旅館噁心死了 44 00:02:31,041 --> 00:02:33,125 我早說了,你應該來住我們家 45 00:02:34,083 --> 00:02:35,791 你也知道我很重視隱私 46 00:02:35,875 --> 00:02:38,958 你也算是我們家人了 在這裡比較舒服 47 00:02:39,041 --> 00:02:40,375 別理我,我在鬧脾氣 48 00:02:40,458 --> 00:02:42,250 很高興來到這裡 49 00:02:42,333 --> 00:02:44,166 湯瑪斯,好好照顧伊莎貝爾 50 00:02:44,250 --> 00:02:47,333 葛麗?葛麗,我需要你幫忙 51 00:02:47,416 --> 00:02:48,833 他走火入魔了 52 00:02:50,333 --> 00:02:52,583 香檳還行嗎? 53 00:02:53,208 --> 00:02:55,041 有點溫溫的 54 00:02:55,791 --> 00:02:58,083 要不要來點比較烈的? 55 00:02:58,166 --> 00:03:00,708 當然好,要乾辣一點的 56 00:03:01,375 --> 00:03:02,375 樂意效勞 57 00:03:04,541 --> 00:03:05,750 你不用知道這個 58 00:03:05,833 --> 00:03:08,416 -真的 -隔天早上我就會收到電報… 59 00:03:08,500 --> 00:03:11,541 我們好替你們倆開心 60 00:03:11,625 --> 00:03:14,708 敬班吉和他的美嬌娘 61 00:03:15,333 --> 00:03:18,166 溫柏里夫婦 要不要給新人一點建議呢? 62 00:03:18,250 --> 00:03:19,583 拜託,當然有 63 00:03:19,666 --> 00:03:22,458 如果你們有我和你媽一半幸運 64 00:03:22,541 --> 00:03:25,458 就會擁有一段長久且幸福美滿的婚姻 65 00:03:25,541 --> 00:03:26,875 -敬班吉,我們愛你 -沒錯 66 00:03:27,458 --> 00:03:29,500 我們愛你們… 67 00:03:29,583 --> 00:03:32,625 祝兩位新人婚禮前夕快樂 68 00:03:32,708 --> 00:03:34,583 嗨,婚禮前夕快樂 69 00:03:34,666 --> 00:03:37,208 婚禮前夕快樂,我愛死這女人了 70 00:03:37,291 --> 00:03:39,708 你有拍到嗎?愛死了 71 00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:49,416 救命啊 72 00:04:18,458 --> 00:04:20,708 南塔克特島警局,我是卡爾副警長 73 00:04:22,541 --> 00:04:23,375 在哪裡? 74 00:04:46,541 --> 00:04:48,625 -喂 -喂,警長,我是卡爾 75 00:04:48,708 --> 00:04:50,916 -什麼事,卡爾? -發現一具浮屍 76 00:04:53,083 --> 00:04:56,875 也祝你國慶週末愉快,副警長 77 00:04:59,083 --> 00:05:00,083 克蘿伊 78 00:05:05,041 --> 00:05:09,166 嘿,你的外燴工作應該取消了 79 00:05:10,208 --> 00:05:11,750 取消?為什麼? 80 00:05:11,833 --> 00:05:13,500 今天婚禮辦不成了 81 00:05:14,583 --> 00:05:15,625 有人死了 82 00:05:17,500 --> 00:05:19,250 什麼?誰? 83 00:05:20,708 --> 00:05:21,708 我得走了 84 00:05:55,875 --> 00:05:57,625 我六點就到了 85 00:05:58,458 --> 00:06:02,375 我向來都會巡視會場,首先 86 00:06:03,416 --> 00:06:05,833 確保出租物品都送到了 87 00:06:05,916 --> 00:06:11,166 她就站在那裡看著屍體,整個人呆掉 88 00:06:11,250 --> 00:06:12,291 卡特警長 89 00:06:13,166 --> 00:06:16,625 亨利警員,我是丹卡特 這是婚禮統籌師羅傑培頓 90 00:06:17,750 --> 00:06:20,875 我是亨利警探,你早就知道了 91 00:06:23,208 --> 00:06:26,375 羅傑,這是地方檢察官派來的保母 92 00:06:27,416 --> 00:06:28,875 頭一次搭直升機? 93 00:06:30,625 --> 00:06:32,458 不是,只是需要來點咖啡 94 00:06:33,416 --> 00:06:35,333 機上沒有餐點服務 95 00:06:37,458 --> 00:06:40,458 你統籌薩克斯小姐的婚禮 有機會跟她熟識嗎? 96 00:06:40,541 --> 00:06:43,208 老實說,我多半都是跟葛麗討論 97 00:06:44,250 --> 00:06:45,250 葛麗… 98 00:06:46,166 --> 00:06:47,583 格里森溫柏里 99 00:06:47,666 --> 00:06:48,541 這是她家嗎? 100 00:06:49,250 --> 00:06:52,458 這是她先生家族傳承五代的房子 101 00:06:52,541 --> 00:06:55,916 以前占地更大 102 00:06:56,750 --> 00:06:59,541 -發生什麼事? -典型的美國悲劇 103 00:06:59,625 --> 00:07:02,708 被酗酒的敗家子給賭光了 104 00:07:02,791 --> 00:07:04,916 但顯然還沒有敗光 105 00:07:07,333 --> 00:07:08,458 謝謝你,培頓先生 106 00:07:20,375 --> 00:07:23,875 -培頓先生,請坐 -好的 107 00:07:26,291 --> 00:07:28,791 -警探馬上就來 -好的 108 00:07:32,083 --> 00:07:34,083 警探隨後就到 109 00:07:38,250 --> 00:07:39,250 謝謝 110 00:07:51,791 --> 00:07:54,208 溫柏里的宅邸,夏園 111 00:07:54,291 --> 00:07:58,541 是一棟舒適的四千萬濱海別墅 112 00:07:58,625 --> 00:08:02,000 葛麗太太有一間禮物包裝室 113 00:08:02,083 --> 00:08:05,958 但我要在自己的房間包裝所有禮物 114 00:08:06,958 --> 00:08:08,000 他們很有錢 115 00:08:08,583 --> 00:08:11,333 “在私人小島經營兒童性犯罪集團” 的那種有錢 116 00:08:12,333 --> 00:08:16,250 “好無聊,來買隻猴子吧”那種有錢 117 00:08:17,916 --> 00:08:20,166 “殺了人可無罪脫身”那種有錢 118 00:08:49,250 --> 00:08:52,958 《模範愛侶》 119 00:08:58,083 --> 00:08:59,083 薩克斯小姐? 120 00:09:02,958 --> 00:09:05,583 我是妮基亨利警探,這是丹卡特警長 121 00:09:05,666 --> 00:09:07,666 我們有幾個問題想請教你 122 00:09:08,875 --> 00:09:10,833 為什麼你會穿著婚紗? 123 00:09:14,333 --> 00:09:16,833 婚禮應該是晚點才舉行 124 00:09:17,583 --> 00:09:20,666 你的腳怎麼割傷的,薩克斯小姐? 125 00:09:22,333 --> 00:09:24,166 -你記得你怎麼受… -嘿… 126 00:09:25,625 --> 00:09:26,791 她驚魂未定 127 00:09:31,333 --> 00:09:32,916 我幫你準備了熱茶 128 00:09:36,166 --> 00:09:39,125 我們想知道昨天發生什麼事 129 00:10:13,500 --> 00:10:19,208 (未來的老婆早安,我愛你,親親) 130 00:10:46,041 --> 00:10:48,416 我們能確定椅子都拿來了嗎? 131 00:10:48,500 --> 00:10:51,333 不只那些,是全部 我要椅子放在房屋旁邊 132 00:10:51,416 --> 00:10:53,166 -酒在大門邊 -好的 133 00:10:53,250 --> 00:10:54,375 他們是這麼說的 134 00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:56,833 艾米莉亞 135 00:10:56,916 --> 00:10:59,166 我不是給了你一件家族睡袍穿嗎? 136 00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:01,291 是啊 137 00:11:01,375 --> 00:11:02,583 有一隻瓢蟲 138 00:11:03,750 --> 00:11:04,750 有什麼? 139 00:11:05,416 --> 00:11:06,416 瓢蟲 140 00:11:07,041 --> 00:11:07,875 我懂了 141 00:11:17,125 --> 00:11:18,416 葛麗? 142 00:11:19,333 --> 00:11:20,791 她很… 143 00:11:20,875 --> 00:11:24,250 她非常…怎麼說那個字呢? 144 00:11:24,958 --> 00:11:26,250 虧毛? 145 00:11:26,916 --> 00:11:28,416 不對,是吹毛 146 00:11:28,500 --> 00:11:30,375 吹毛求疵又難搞 147 00:11:31,291 --> 00:11:33,916 兒子們很怕葛麗太太嗎? 148 00:11:38,708 --> 00:11:39,833 那當然 149 00:11:41,041 --> 00:11:42,041 三個都很怕 150 00:11:43,708 --> 00:11:46,750 但要不是出於畏懼,早就天下大亂了 151 00:11:47,416 --> 00:11:48,666 戈莎? 152 00:11:49,458 --> 00:11:51,666 我們得聯絡苗圃的卡佳 153 00:11:51,750 --> 00:11:54,708 天氣這麼熱,把牡丹換成玫瑰 154 00:11:54,791 --> 00:11:55,791 是的,葛麗太太 155 00:11:55,875 --> 00:11:56,750 -早安 -好 156 00:11:56,833 --> 00:11:59,125 必要的話,我在塞勒姆的連鎖超市 157 00:11:59,208 --> 00:12:00,750 看到一些不錯的康乃馨 158 00:12:01,833 --> 00:12:03,291 什麼? 159 00:12:03,375 --> 00:12:05,000 -我開玩笑的 -真搞笑 160 00:12:06,958 --> 00:12:08,583 早安,搞笑女 161 00:12:09,916 --> 00:12:11,208 你很適合這件睡袍 162 00:12:11,291 --> 00:12:14,000 我相信不管最後怎樣,一定都會很棒 163 00:12:14,083 --> 00:12:15,583 別為小事操心,葛葛大 164 00:12:15,666 --> 00:12:17,958 對,艾米莉亞從不為小事操心 165 00:12:18,041 --> 00:12:20,416 所以她才嫁給你,小屌男 166 00:12:21,208 --> 00:12:22,708 嘿 167 00:12:22,791 --> 00:12:25,208 -好喔,幼稚鬼 -別浪費優質碳水 168 00:12:26,833 --> 00:12:28,041 婚紗穿不下也無所謂? 169 00:12:30,541 --> 00:12:32,708 戈莎,請給我奇亞籽布丁 170 00:12:32,791 --> 00:12:33,708 那放在… 171 00:12:33,791 --> 00:12:36,291 來了,有求必應 172 00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:40,916 謝謝 173 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:42,125 不客氣 174 00:12:42,708 --> 00:12:44,666 -派對點心 -超美味 175 00:12:45,375 --> 00:12:47,291 你知道這有一半是維他命吧? 176 00:12:47,375 --> 00:12:49,291 不過是哪一半?這才是有趣之處 177 00:12:51,291 --> 00:12:54,833 威爾,來玩處方藥輪盤? 你要把聰明藥放進來嗎? 178 00:12:54,916 --> 00:12:55,916 我把我的都賣掉了 179 00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:59,083 真是一群帥氣的任性小孩 180 00:13:00,375 --> 00:13:01,291 謝謝 181 00:13:01,375 --> 00:13:04,291 -你的果菜汁,泰格先生 -謝謝你,戈莎,感謝 182 00:13:09,250 --> 00:13:12,208 -你還好嗎? -只是疲憊罷了,一堆事情 183 00:13:12,291 --> 00:13:13,291 你看這個 184 00:13:13,375 --> 00:13:15,250 -你工作的樣子真美 -拜託 185 00:13:15,333 --> 00:13:16,833 -泰格,你濕濕的 -我知道 186 00:13:16,916 --> 00:13:18,458 不,你會…真是的 187 00:13:18,541 --> 00:13:20,750 聽我說,一切都會完美無瑕的 188 00:13:20,833 --> 00:13:22,500 因為你都搞定了 189 00:13:23,666 --> 00:13:27,666 所有的人都對你敬佩不已 190 00:13:27,750 --> 00:13:29,125 好 191 00:13:29,208 --> 00:13:32,916 兩位,拜託,顧慮一下少年威爾 192 00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:34,541 黛芙妮剛跟他分手 193 00:13:35,291 --> 00:13:36,875 -真的嗎? -什麼? 194 00:13:36,958 --> 00:13:38,083 很煩耶 195 00:13:38,166 --> 00:13:39,916 她隨隨便便就把你甩了,老弟 196 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:42,791 那是協議分手,沒什麼大不了的 197 00:13:43,375 --> 00:13:44,500 謝天謝地 198 00:13:45,375 --> 00:13:46,208 威爾? 199 00:13:46,291 --> 00:13:47,250 -是真的 -怎樣? 200 00:13:47,333 --> 00:13:49,291 -天啊 -別說了 201 00:13:49,375 --> 00:13:50,916 那是真的,你說她是賤人 202 00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:52,500 她是賤人 203 00:13:52,583 --> 00:13:53,416 威爾 204 00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:55,625 威爾,我沒說她是賤人 205 00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:58,083 又是梅莉特嗎? 206 00:13:59,208 --> 00:14:00,166 對 207 00:14:00,250 --> 00:14:02,916 伴娘 208 00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:04,958 分離焦慮 209 00:14:06,708 --> 00:14:07,708 對 210 00:14:10,333 --> 00:14:11,791 我要接個電話 211 00:14:13,833 --> 00:14:15,083 黛芙妮是哪一個? 212 00:14:15,666 --> 00:14:17,416 -鼻大奶小 -湯姆 213 00:14:18,666 --> 00:14:19,583 高得離譜 214 00:14:19,666 --> 00:14:21,333 -打排球那個? -就是她 215 00:14:21,416 --> 00:14:22,958 可惜了,我喜歡她 216 00:14:24,041 --> 00:14:29,500 泰格先生的果菜汁中 我放了羽衣甘藍補充纖維 217 00:14:29,583 --> 00:14:34,166 杏仁奶補充蛋白質,蘋果增加甜味 218 00:14:34,250 --> 00:14:37,666 還有伏特加添加樂趣 219 00:14:37,750 --> 00:14:40,041 戈莎超想撲倒泰格的 220 00:14:40,125 --> 00:14:42,416 我敢說她會看著他的嬰兒照自慰 221 00:14:42,500 --> 00:14:43,833 她都把照片放在床邊 222 00:14:47,166 --> 00:14:48,166 爹地 223 00:14:48,250 --> 00:14:50,875 他缺點一籮筐 224 00:14:51,458 --> 00:14:53,666 但他的確有個優點 225 00:14:53,750 --> 00:14:55,416 他讓人想入非非 226 00:14:55,500 --> 00:14:56,750 我願意跟他上床 227 00:14:58,083 --> 00:14:59,208 嗯,我… 228 00:14:59,291 --> 00:15:00,458 我可能上過他了 229 00:15:01,666 --> 00:15:04,000 泰格溫柏里,性感老爹 230 00:15:24,791 --> 00:15:26,250 卡蘿? 231 00:15:26,333 --> 00:15:28,208 抱歉讓你久等了 232 00:15:28,291 --> 00:15:30,666 -不會,別這麼見外 -我上午忙翻天了 233 00:15:30,750 --> 00:15:32,041 我了解 234 00:15:32,125 --> 00:15:34,625 -我帶戒指來了 -謝謝 235 00:15:36,666 --> 00:15:37,500 好極了 236 00:15:38,125 --> 00:15:40,375 -簡約、低調 -愛死了 237 00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:43,000 親愛的? 238 00:15:46,875 --> 00:15:49,041 -你不喜歡嗎? -不喜歡什麼? 239 00:15:49,125 --> 00:15:50,291 那條手環 240 00:15:50,375 --> 00:15:52,708 泰格精心挑選給你的 241 00:15:53,291 --> 00:15:57,125 金色小手鐲,鑲有雅致的小密鑲鑽 242 00:16:00,625 --> 00:16:02,541 -那副手環,沒錯 -是的 243 00:16:02,625 --> 00:16:05,583 -沒有,我很喜歡… -那條金色小手鐲,那就好 244 00:16:06,250 --> 00:16:07,125 很好 245 00:16:07,666 --> 00:16:10,041 -我還有一堆事要處理 -那當然 246 00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:12,625 -但是讓我… -沒問題 247 00:16:12,708 --> 00:16:15,125 -總之,我得走了 -沒問題,親愛的 248 00:16:15,208 --> 00:16:17,916 戈莎會送你出去,我下週聯絡你 249 00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:19,083 好,祝明天順利 250 00:16:35,375 --> 00:16:38,666 (島嶼首飾店) 251 00:16:40,250 --> 00:16:47,166 (鑲鑽金手鐲,總額:1萬8476元) 252 00:17:03,083 --> 00:17:04,083 天啊 253 00:17:09,916 --> 00:17:11,666 -嗨 -嗨 254 00:17:12,791 --> 00:17:13,791 嗨 255 00:17:15,125 --> 00:17:16,125 你還好嗎? 256 00:17:16,750 --> 00:17:17,791 沒事,我很好 257 00:17:17,875 --> 00:17:20,666 我在幫你爸爸處理一些事 258 00:17:22,041 --> 00:17:23,375 有空聊幾句嗎? 259 00:17:23,458 --> 00:17:24,541 當然,親愛的 260 00:17:26,125 --> 00:17:28,500 好,今天早上 261 00:17:28,583 --> 00:17:31,958 你對艾米莉亞態度不太好 262 00:17:32,041 --> 00:17:34,833 我希望你能更努力一點,拜託 263 00:17:36,500 --> 00:17:38,541 我?更努力點?有沒有搞錯? 264 00:17:39,833 --> 00:17:43,375 拜託,是她穿著內衣褲跑來跑去 265 00:17:43,458 --> 00:17:46,083 我說的是,這表示你… 266 00:17:48,833 --> 00:17:51,958 對老公家人有多在意 267 00:17:52,041 --> 00:17:53,250 和尊重 268 00:17:53,333 --> 00:17:54,750 好,聽著 269 00:17:54,833 --> 00:17:58,666 對,她跟你們很不同,好嗎? 270 00:17:58,750 --> 00:18:00,208 但是她很在意你的想法 271 00:18:00,833 --> 00:18:04,458 只不過她重視的事情跟你不一樣 272 00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:06,000 像什麼? 273 00:18:06,875 --> 00:18:10,666 怎麼說?像是你的同學是誰 274 00:18:10,750 --> 00:18:12,791 或是大門顏色 275 00:18:12,875 --> 00:18:16,875 或是否受邀參加 瑪麗亞歐巴馬在葡萄園島的婚禮 276 00:18:16,958 --> 00:18:19,500 瑪麗亞歐巴馬要結婚了?很棒吧? 277 00:18:20,208 --> 00:18:22,416 -好極了 -如我所說,她很不同 278 00:18:23,125 --> 00:18:24,500 但她有一對很好的父母 279 00:18:25,541 --> 00:18:27,583 他們克服萬難 280 00:18:27,666 --> 00:18:29,000 我覺得那很… 281 00:18:29,083 --> 00:18:31,791 怎樣?跟你父母剛好相反? 跟我們截然不同? 282 00:18:31,875 --> 00:18:34,208 你覺得我們不是好父母?拜託 283 00:18:34,291 --> 00:18:37,083 偶爾有這種感覺,但這不是我的重點 284 00:18:42,041 --> 00:18:43,791 班吉 285 00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:47,000 聽著 286 00:18:48,375 --> 00:18:51,666 你顯然很愛她 287 00:18:52,500 --> 00:18:56,583 我想確定她也一樣愛你 288 00:18:57,458 --> 00:19:00,083 今晚就是彩排晚宴了 289 00:19:00,666 --> 00:19:02,500 -還要… -非要我說不可嗎? 290 00:19:02,583 --> 00:19:04,125 我來到這裡時 291 00:19:04,208 --> 00:19:06,875 我來南塔克特島 跟你爸爸的家人見面時 292 00:19:06,958 --> 00:19:08,083 想知道我做了什麼嗎? 293 00:19:08,166 --> 00:19:10,291 我去買了一大堆新衣服 294 00:19:10,375 --> 00:19:12,416 我學會怎麼剝龍蝦殼 295 00:19:13,333 --> 00:19:15,375 我研讀湯姆沃爾夫 296 00:19:16,583 --> 00:19:19,916 我是可以要她更努力一點 297 00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:22,000 我會叫她早上穿戴整齊 298 00:19:22,083 --> 00:19:25,458 -抱歉,班吉,聽我說 -叫她讀《名利之火》 299 00:19:25,541 --> 00:19:27,166 我不在乎 300 00:19:27,250 --> 00:19:30,666 我不在乎她上的是哈佛或邁阿密大學 301 00:19:30,750 --> 00:19:34,166 是俄亥俄州邁阿密大學,媽,好嗎? 302 00:19:34,250 --> 00:19:36,791 那裡有全國最棒的動物學課程 303 00:19:36,875 --> 00:19:38,958 她是拿全額獎學金入學的 304 00:19:39,041 --> 00:19:40,750 這我不知道,你想知道原因嗎? 305 00:19:40,833 --> 00:19:43,791 因為她從來沒有試著融入 306 00:19:43,875 --> 00:19:46,791 成為你家族的一員 307 00:19:47,333 --> 00:19:49,958 我在意她愛你 308 00:19:52,208 --> 00:19:53,750 偏偏挑今天講,好喔 309 00:19:54,333 --> 00:19:58,375 蠢丫頭,她大概以為嫁給我就夠了 310 00:19:59,875 --> 00:20:02,875 我跟你說,不夠,真的不夠 311 00:20:03,791 --> 00:20:04,958 長遠來說可不夠 312 00:20:09,541 --> 00:20:10,958 -好吧 -好的 313 00:20:21,541 --> 00:20:24,416 媽的,葛麗,閉嘴啊 314 00:20:37,666 --> 00:20:38,625 喂,伊妮 315 00:20:38,708 --> 00:20:40,291 葛麗,親愛的 316 00:20:40,375 --> 00:20:42,791 我不想耽擱你的時間,你明天辦婚禮 317 00:20:42,875 --> 00:20:45,833 但我想確認下週的新書活動 你都準備好了嗎? 318 00:20:45,916 --> 00:20:48,916 你和泰格準備好 接受《時人雜誌》專訪了嗎? 319 00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:51,791 我相信標題會是“模範愛侶” 320 00:20:52,708 --> 00:20:55,583 我一直在想這件事,伊妮,我… 321 00:20:56,250 --> 00:20:58,166 其實我不希望被貼標籤 322 00:20:58,250 --> 00:21:00,916 “模範愛侶”這種詞,太荒謬了 323 00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:04,666 我們都需要嚮往不切實際的事物 所以才會看小說 324 00:21:04,750 --> 00:21:07,666 我不知道人們怎麼還會感興趣 325 00:21:07,750 --> 00:21:09,333 我們都結婚八百年了 326 00:21:09,416 --> 00:21:11,791 人們感興趣是因為 你們的婚姻維持29年了 327 00:21:11,875 --> 00:21:15,375 你們是現實生活的佳偶 那是你神話的一部分 328 00:21:17,500 --> 00:21:18,500 我懂 329 00:21:19,875 --> 00:21:21,333 葛麗,你還好嗎? 330 00:21:24,541 --> 00:21:27,333 沒事,我得掛了,謝了,伊妮 331 00:21:43,916 --> 00:21:48,250 (柏德瑞克葛拉漢) 332 00:21:57,250 --> 00:22:00,125 我看不出來葛麗是否知情 333 00:22:00,208 --> 00:22:03,250 但她知道的話,絕對不會表現出來 334 00:22:04,250 --> 00:22:06,791 她凡事都不露聲色 335 00:22:06,875 --> 00:22:11,166 你永遠不會知道葛麗對你的看法 336 00:22:12,291 --> 00:22:13,333 我是說 337 00:22:14,208 --> 00:22:15,208 真實看法 338 00:22:16,166 --> 00:22:17,166 沒錯 339 00:22:19,333 --> 00:22:20,333 可是 340 00:22:21,500 --> 00:22:23,208 我願意為她赴湯蹈火 341 00:22:28,333 --> 00:22:29,625 呃,沒那麼誇張 342 00:22:30,541 --> 00:22:31,541 但願意做很多事 343 00:22:31,625 --> 00:22:32,750 她超讚的 344 00:22:33,708 --> 00:22:36,958 謝謝你陪我去接我爸媽 345 00:22:37,041 --> 00:22:38,416 我很樂意 346 00:22:38,500 --> 00:22:41,291 我很希望他們能感受到被歡迎 347 00:22:47,500 --> 00:22:48,500 (米契的圖書角落) 348 00:22:48,583 --> 00:22:50,416 (《魂斷杜拜》 葛麗格里森溫柏里著) 349 00:22:53,625 --> 00:22:55,208 希望他們有趕上渡輪 350 00:22:55,291 --> 00:22:56,708 因為我媽媽罹癌 351 00:22:56,791 --> 00:22:59,875 她近來沒什麼心思留意細節 352 00:22:59,958 --> 00:23:01,458 像是出發時間之類的事 353 00:23:02,125 --> 00:23:04,000 我爸為了照顧她也分身乏術 354 00:23:04,083 --> 00:23:06,375 有狀況的話你早就接到電話了 他們會來的 355 00:23:07,833 --> 00:23:08,833 我媽媽… 356 00:23:09,958 --> 00:23:13,583 她對一切都很不自在 357 00:23:14,333 --> 00:23:16,125 她幾乎不曾脫掉假髮 358 00:23:16,208 --> 00:23:18,041 她覺得要是拿下來 359 00:23:19,125 --> 00:23:21,458 大家就會發現她生病了 360 00:23:22,458 --> 00:23:25,208 我保證不會提到假髮 361 00:23:25,291 --> 00:23:26,250 太好了 362 00:23:26,333 --> 00:23:28,583 我問你一件事,你媽媽抽菸嗎? 363 00:23:29,166 --> 00:23:30,333 像什麼,大麻嗎? 364 00:23:31,041 --> 00:23:32,416 -對 -沒有 365 00:23:32,500 --> 00:23:33,750 -大麻軟糖呢? -沒有 366 00:23:33,833 --> 00:23:35,458 她試過大麻二酚嗎? 367 00:23:36,541 --> 00:23:40,083 -應該沒有 -天啊,沒人介紹她這種好物 368 00:23:40,166 --> 00:23:42,083 那是天然止痛劑 369 00:23:42,708 --> 00:23:46,333 對,我爸得攝護腺癌時 我們會把它碾碎摻進他的麥片裡 370 00:23:46,416 --> 00:23:49,166 他們在那裡,媽媽,爸爸 371 00:23:49,791 --> 00:23:52,541 -寶貝 -媽媽,爸爸,嗨 372 00:23:52,625 --> 00:23:56,000 -寶貝 -是新娘,新娘來了 373 00:23:58,333 --> 00:24:00,250 -嗨,寶貝 -嗨,甜心 374 00:24:00,833 --> 00:24:02,541 -你們來了 -我們趕到了 375 00:24:02,625 --> 00:24:05,666 -對,我們來了 -爸媽,還記得泰格嗎? 376 00:24:05,750 --> 00:24:08,875 -嗨 -真高興再次見到你 377 00:24:08,958 --> 00:24:10,958 我也很高興再見到兩位 378 00:24:11,041 --> 00:24:12,083 你好,布魯斯 379 00:24:13,333 --> 00:24:14,708 -走吧 -沒問題 380 00:24:14,791 --> 00:24:16,291 -我來拿 -不用了 381 00:24:16,375 --> 00:24:17,375 我來拿 382 00:24:19,083 --> 00:24:20,833 -旅途順利嗎? -順利 383 00:24:20,916 --> 00:24:22,333 是嗎? 384 00:24:22,416 --> 00:24:25,375 -渡輪大排長龍? -是啊,對 385 00:24:29,791 --> 00:24:31,416 好壯觀,是這間嗎? 386 00:24:32,083 --> 00:24:33,708 -就是這間房子? -對 387 00:24:33,791 --> 00:24:34,875 夏園,對吧? 388 00:24:36,416 --> 00:24:38,500 (夏園) 389 00:24:43,750 --> 00:24:45,500 -嘿,他來了 -嗨 390 00:24:46,541 --> 00:24:47,500 你好嗎? 391 00:24:47,583 --> 00:24:50,083 -很好 -嗨,班吉 392 00:24:50,166 --> 00:24:52,875 歡迎,你好,布魯斯 393 00:24:53,583 --> 00:24:55,666 -真高興你們來了 -嗨,葛麗 394 00:24:55,750 --> 00:24:57,166 -你好 -很高興見到你 395 00:24:57,250 --> 00:24:59,833 -凱倫,希望此行不會太累 -嗨,我是艾比 396 00:24:59,916 --> 00:25:01,708 -不會,很愉快 -幸會 397 00:25:02,375 --> 00:25:03,833 -謝謝 -嗨 398 00:25:03,916 --> 00:25:07,458 我想送這個給你,應該說送給大家 399 00:25:07,541 --> 00:25:10,291 -太棒了,我們都有耶 -不客氣 400 00:25:10,375 --> 00:25:11,833 -我是艾比 -嗨 401 00:25:11,916 --> 00:25:15,291 真高興能取消國慶假期計畫改來這裡 402 00:25:16,666 --> 00:25:21,166 如果天氣沒有轉壞 我們晚點去鎮上逛逛? 403 00:25:21,250 --> 00:25:23,083 好啊,布魯斯,你打高爾夫球嗎? 404 00:25:23,166 --> 00:25:24,708 沒有,我不會打 405 00:25:24,791 --> 00:25:28,541 你三兩下就學會了,老公 他運動細胞很好 406 00:25:28,625 --> 00:25:31,291 這不是說會就會的,但是來吧,威爾 407 00:25:31,375 --> 00:25:32,791 這裡有飲料 408 00:25:32,875 --> 00:25:35,041 -我們為你們準備了飲料 -真棒,好像旅館 409 00:25:35,125 --> 00:25:38,708 我們準備了黑莓馬丁尼 410 00:25:38,791 --> 00:25:40,916 -這是莫希托 -莫希托? 411 00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:43,666 類似酷樂調酒,但是更棒 412 00:25:43,750 --> 00:25:46,458 -才不像酷樂調酒 -閉嘴,湯姆 413 00:25:46,541 --> 00:25:48,708 -你會喜歡的,媽,喝喝看 -好 414 00:25:48,791 --> 00:25:51,875 基督教青年會的朋友會想看照片 415 00:25:51,958 --> 00:25:53,125 方便讓我… 416 00:25:53,208 --> 00:25:54,333 -來吧 -當然 417 00:25:54,416 --> 00:25:55,375 謝謝 418 00:25:55,916 --> 00:25:57,875 要從屋子前面拍嗎? 419 00:25:57,958 --> 00:26:01,291 -好,一定會很棒 -嘿,大家都進來 420 00:26:01,375 --> 00:26:02,750 -拍張大合照 -好 421 00:26:02,833 --> 00:26:04,666 威爾,好的,說茄子 422 00:26:05,250 --> 00:26:07,750 -茄子 -茄子 423 00:26:08,333 --> 00:26:10,375 -好了 -謝謝女兒 424 00:26:11,041 --> 00:26:12,625 伴娘駕到 425 00:26:16,583 --> 00:26:19,083 我好想你,我根本沒離開過 426 00:26:20,875 --> 00:26:23,083 伴郎到了 427 00:26:23,166 --> 00:26:24,625 -嘿 -兄弟,你好嗎? 428 00:26:24,708 --> 00:26:26,291 -我很好 -你好嗎? 429 00:26:26,375 --> 00:26:28,208 -好得不得了 -你還好嗎? 430 00:26:28,291 --> 00:26:29,250 很好 431 00:26:29,333 --> 00:26:30,625 -嘿 -舒特 432 00:26:31,833 --> 00:26:35,041 期待當伴郎嗎? 有人找我當伴郎的話,我會很期待 433 00:26:35,125 --> 00:26:36,625 反正你也不是我的伴郎 434 00:26:36,708 --> 00:26:40,166 不對,我的伴郎就是你 沒關係,我不介意,無所謂 435 00:26:40,250 --> 00:26:42,250 你是我的武大郎,所以… 436 00:26:42,333 --> 00:26:44,208 -很幽默,這好笑 -別生氣 437 00:26:44,791 --> 00:26:47,583 舒特,我不知道你們會一起來 438 00:26:47,666 --> 00:26:51,625 他也在排計程車 結果就搭了我的便車 439 00:26:51,708 --> 00:26:52,833 新郎的苦差事 440 00:26:52,916 --> 00:26:54,666 舒特,擁抱一下? 441 00:26:57,916 --> 00:27:00,041 嘿,是布魯斯 442 00:27:00,666 --> 00:27:01,791 謝謝 443 00:27:07,416 --> 00:27:09,625 -伊蓮,拿走 -是 444 00:27:10,958 --> 00:27:17,041 我們提前舉行婚禮 就為了配合薩克斯太太的死期 445 00:27:17,875 --> 00:27:20,208 她卻送雜貨店的香蕉當禮物 446 00:27:31,625 --> 00:27:34,416 今天就要舉行彩排晚宴了,各位 447 00:27:34,500 --> 00:27:36,041 不可思議 448 00:27:36,125 --> 00:27:37,833 我在一座很酷的游泳池畔 449 00:27:37,916 --> 00:27:41,833 別走開,因為我會帶來超精彩的更新 450 00:27:41,916 --> 00:27:43,083 嘿,舒特 451 00:27:44,125 --> 00:27:45,291 跟我合照 452 00:27:49,250 --> 00:27:51,000 -不要接 -DL? 453 00:27:51,083 --> 00:27:53,500 這是我的祕密炮友 454 00:27:53,583 --> 00:27:55,791 那是代號,不是真名,沒有人用真名 455 00:27:55,875 --> 00:27:57,875 -對,大家都知道 -是啊 456 00:27:59,291 --> 00:28:00,291 好的 457 00:28:01,583 --> 00:28:03,666 -好的 -你還好嗎? 458 00:28:04,625 --> 00:28:06,125 沒事,我… 459 00:28:06,208 --> 00:28:07,875 他女友剛跟他分手了 460 00:28:07,958 --> 00:28:12,375 老兄,拜託,我們明顯合不來 所以才協議分手… 461 00:28:12,458 --> 00:28:14,166 什麼?不對,不可能 462 00:28:14,875 --> 00:28:17,166 我要宰了她,她聽起來像個白痴 463 00:28:17,875 --> 00:28:20,083 -願意跟我合照嗎? -好啊 464 00:28:20,166 --> 00:28:21,083 可以幫我們拍嗎? 465 00:28:21,666 --> 00:28:23,291 跟你同齡的女孩是我的目標族群 466 00:28:25,250 --> 00:28:28,125 好,我會笑得很開心 好像你說了很逗的話 467 00:28:28,208 --> 00:28:30,541 -因為女生喜歡有趣的男生 -好的 468 00:28:32,291 --> 00:28:35,125 -我看看,可愛嗎? -很可愛,來 469 00:28:37,208 --> 00:28:38,625 超可愛的 470 00:28:40,583 --> 00:28:41,583 可以標註你嗎? 471 00:28:41,666 --> 00:28:43,125 -可以 -好的 472 00:28:48,166 --> 00:28:49,583 -威爾 -什麼事? 473 00:28:50,250 --> 00:28:51,458 來吧 474 00:28:57,125 --> 00:28:58,541 你的鞋子很酷 475 00:28:59,208 --> 00:29:00,333 謝謝 476 00:29:00,416 --> 00:29:02,875 -好,回頭見 -回頭見,威爾 477 00:29:03,458 --> 00:29:04,333 再見 478 00:29:08,333 --> 00:29:12,541 梅莉特很…怎麼說呢?我不想說淫蕩 479 00:29:12,625 --> 00:29:15,208 我不會說她是蕩婦,但是她… 480 00:29:15,291 --> 00:29:18,333 她就是很會玩,對吧? 481 00:29:18,916 --> 00:29:21,416 我曾在紐約一場晚宴上見過梅莉特 482 00:29:22,166 --> 00:29:24,333 早在艾米莉亞和班吉認識之前 483 00:29:24,416 --> 00:29:27,458 她在跟我朋友在蘇富比的主管約會 484 00:29:28,458 --> 00:29:31,791 他超有錢,而且很矮 485 00:29:32,791 --> 00:29:34,375 他們一定非常相愛 486 00:29:37,250 --> 00:29:39,333 我敢拍胸脯掛保證 487 00:29:40,708 --> 00:29:41,833 我絕對沒有跟她上床 488 00:29:45,208 --> 00:29:47,416 你怎麼不乾脆跟它公開交往 489 00:29:47,500 --> 00:29:50,625 這艘小爛船還比我受寵 490 00:29:53,041 --> 00:29:54,666 它非常端莊典雅 491 00:30:00,916 --> 00:30:02,041 謝謝 492 00:30:07,583 --> 00:30:09,416 -這是班吉的重要日子 -沒錯 493 00:30:12,541 --> 00:30:15,250 我們的寶貝男孩明天要轉大人了 494 00:30:17,625 --> 00:30:21,500 倒不是說婚姻是某種成年禮 495 00:30:21,583 --> 00:30:24,291 至少我的不是 496 00:30:25,541 --> 00:30:27,541 艾比把我的卵蛋掐得緊緊的 497 00:30:30,708 --> 00:30:32,958 我答應她我們會買一間新公寓 498 00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:39,458 嘿,我需要借一筆錢 499 00:30:42,083 --> 00:30:43,291 只是臨時救急 500 00:30:43,916 --> 00:30:46,583 我玩期貨有點被套牢了 501 00:30:52,291 --> 00:30:53,291 老天 502 00:30:54,750 --> 00:30:58,291 我去格羅頓取這艘船時 503 00:30:58,375 --> 00:31:00,750 尼克的表情讓我難以忘懷 504 00:31:01,583 --> 00:31:05,625 我看得出來他煞費苦心製作 505 00:31:05,708 --> 00:31:08,125 看看那道爛刻紋 506 00:31:09,958 --> 00:31:13,750 他得意洋洋 因為這玩意會刻有他的名字出海 507 00:31:17,708 --> 00:31:21,500 聽來他確實付出一番心血 508 00:31:24,750 --> 00:31:26,416 因為他知道會獲得回報 509 00:31:27,375 --> 00:31:29,541 他讓他的寶貝降臨在這世界上 510 00:31:30,500 --> 00:31:32,500 他知道它會乘風破浪 511 00:31:34,416 --> 00:31:35,250 而不是… 512 00:31:36,875 --> 00:31:38,833 像顆石頭沉到水底 513 00:31:40,083 --> 00:31:41,083 懂嗎? 514 00:32:02,375 --> 00:32:03,500 天啊 515 00:32:05,666 --> 00:32:08,125 葛麗好像希望我放棄 516 00:32:08,208 --> 00:32:10,458 說真的,管她去死 517 00:32:11,125 --> 00:32:12,791 她是個勢利鬼 518 00:32:13,708 --> 00:32:16,916 她嫁給泰格一定是為了他的貴族姓氏 519 00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:19,125 好讓她的書衣看起來更酷 520 00:32:20,166 --> 00:32:22,333 我今天早上叫她葛葛大 521 00:32:23,958 --> 00:32:26,250 我發誓她一定超不爽 522 00:32:26,333 --> 00:32:28,916 氣到她緊實的小屁眼都在發抖 523 00:32:29,000 --> 00:32:30,666 別說了 524 00:32:32,000 --> 00:32:34,250 我可不要想到葛麗的屁眼 525 00:32:35,541 --> 00:32:38,291 但這麼一想 那裡肯定有做美白和除毛 526 00:32:40,083 --> 00:32:41,000 一定的 527 00:32:50,541 --> 00:32:51,666 被我看到了,賤人 528 00:32:56,291 --> 00:32:57,833 好,說吧 529 00:32:58,916 --> 00:33:00,083 到底發生什麼事? 530 00:33:04,708 --> 00:33:05,708 好的 531 00:33:10,000 --> 00:33:15,000 你可曾深愛過一個人 532 00:33:16,916 --> 00:33:22,458 不惜一切要跟對方在一起? 533 00:33:27,166 --> 00:33:30,791 我不確定我有這麼愛班吉 534 00:33:31,583 --> 00:33:32,583 了解 535 00:33:34,375 --> 00:33:36,458 但這不光是因為他的爛老媽吧? 536 00:33:36,541 --> 00:33:40,375 -因為你不是要跟他老媽結婚 -我知道我很幸運,真的 537 00:33:40,458 --> 00:33:42,583 問題是班吉,他很… 538 00:33:44,041 --> 00:33:46,083 他很善良 539 00:33:46,958 --> 00:33:48,000 很帥氣 540 00:33:48,083 --> 00:33:50,875 -很有錢,老天,抱歉 -住口 541 00:33:52,916 --> 00:33:53,833 別這樣 542 00:33:53,916 --> 00:33:56,833 -我愛他,你也很清楚 -抱歉,我知道 543 00:33:57,750 --> 00:33:58,583 可是… 544 00:34:01,583 --> 00:34:03,125 我不是應該要… 545 00:34:05,166 --> 00:34:06,208 愛到不可自拔嗎? 546 00:34:08,375 --> 00:34:09,375 例如 547 00:34:10,583 --> 00:34:14,750 跟他在一起時,我會忍不住觸碰他 548 00:34:14,833 --> 00:34:18,500 他不在身邊時,我會想像 549 00:34:19,791 --> 00:34:21,708 下次見面時觸碰他的情景 550 00:34:27,541 --> 00:34:29,416 我知道是怎麼回事了 551 00:34:30,041 --> 00:34:32,500 -真的嗎? -對,這是臨陣畏縮 552 00:34:34,000 --> 00:34:34,875 很正常 553 00:34:37,041 --> 00:34:38,166 不用擔心 554 00:34:38,875 --> 00:34:40,708 對,你說得沒錯 555 00:34:42,041 --> 00:34:46,625 總之,就算我想放棄 現在也沒辦法了 556 00:34:47,708 --> 00:34:50,875 三八,你想幹麼就幹麼 557 00:34:51,791 --> 00:34:55,375 我會力挺你到底,好嗎? 558 00:34:57,250 --> 00:34:58,333 可是… 559 00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:03,041 你不是真的想悔婚吧? 560 00:35:04,458 --> 00:35:08,750 你不是為了你媽媽才結婚的吧? 561 00:35:13,500 --> 00:35:14,500 不是 562 00:35:16,750 --> 00:35:17,583 我不是 563 00:35:35,625 --> 00:35:37,583 (去游泳,愛你) 564 00:36:52,166 --> 00:36:54,666 (危險藥物,注意) 565 00:37:25,291 --> 00:37:26,291 好了 566 00:37:32,791 --> 00:37:34,916 -你沒事吧? -掉下來了 567 00:37:37,791 --> 00:37:38,708 抱歉 568 00:37:42,083 --> 00:37:43,458 好,誰要球? 569 00:37:50,875 --> 00:37:51,708 嘿 570 00:37:56,000 --> 00:37:57,041 你沒事吧? 571 00:38:01,458 --> 00:38:02,458 嘿… 572 00:38:04,666 --> 00:38:06,208 婚禮前夕快樂 573 00:38:07,708 --> 00:38:09,583 我的天 574 00:38:11,208 --> 00:38:13,250 -班吉 -你喜歡嗎? 575 00:38:13,333 --> 00:38:14,416 我好愛 576 00:38:16,666 --> 00:38:19,500 我看起來好雍容華貴 577 00:38:21,000 --> 00:38:22,583 還沒有全乾,所以… 578 00:38:24,333 --> 00:38:25,333 好的 579 00:38:28,916 --> 00:38:30,833 你很雍容華貴啊 580 00:38:32,750 --> 00:38:34,083 -最好是 -真的啊 581 00:38:34,166 --> 00:38:35,291 丟過來 582 00:38:38,750 --> 00:38:41,166 能娶到你,我是世界上最幸運的男人 583 00:38:45,750 --> 00:38:47,791 我喜歡你一身顏料味 584 00:38:55,625 --> 00:38:56,666 丟過來 585 00:39:34,000 --> 00:39:35,000 怎麼了? 586 00:39:38,333 --> 00:39:39,333 沒事 587 00:39:43,166 --> 00:39:45,250 -我做錯什麼了? -沒有 588 00:39:47,708 --> 00:39:49,791 你很完美,我配不上你 589 00:39:52,708 --> 00:39:53,708 完美? 590 00:39:56,500 --> 00:39:57,500 好的 591 00:39:58,875 --> 00:40:00,166 你想說什麼? 592 00:40:02,250 --> 00:40:03,250 因為… 593 00:40:04,833 --> 00:40:05,833 沒事 594 00:40:13,375 --> 00:40:14,375 該死 595 00:40:40,500 --> 00:40:43,333 我知道葛麗認為有點太早訂婚了 596 00:40:43,958 --> 00:40:46,291 艾米莉亞和班吉去年才認識 597 00:40:46,375 --> 00:40:48,375 動物園的募款活動認識的 598 00:40:48,458 --> 00:40:53,416 艾米莉亞太太會洗自己的餐具 599 00:40:53,500 --> 00:40:54,791 很沒禮貌 600 00:40:54,875 --> 00:40:58,166 我可不會去動物園 搶她的工作,照顧那些動物 601 00:41:07,208 --> 00:41:09,041 薩克斯小姐很討人喜歡 602 00:41:09,125 --> 00:41:12,250 但她是賓州伊斯頓人 603 00:41:13,750 --> 00:41:15,583 好的,該怎麼說呢? 604 00:41:17,208 --> 00:41:19,583 她不屬於莫諾摩這個地方 605 00:41:21,791 --> 00:41:22,833 我是說真的 606 00:41:22,916 --> 00:41:25,791 她直搗蜂窩 607 00:41:26,583 --> 00:41:29,250 肯定有人會遭殃 608 00:41:31,041 --> 00:41:33,958 他說:“在我婚禮日免談” 婚禮前夕快樂 609 00:41:34,041 --> 00:41:37,166 婚禮前夕快樂,我愛死這女人了 你有拍到嗎? 610 00:41:37,250 --> 00:41:41,291 好,這把刀顯然 是在案發現場附近找到的 611 00:41:41,375 --> 00:41:43,000 鑑識組正在進行化驗 612 00:41:43,083 --> 00:41:45,166 告訴我,這是什麼刀? 613 00:41:49,583 --> 00:41:50,791 生蠔刀 614 00:41:52,583 --> 00:41:54,458 用來剝生蠔的刀? 615 00:41:54,541 --> 00:41:56,458 你真的從沒見過生蠔刀? 616 00:41:56,541 --> 00:41:57,666 跟你說,卡爾 617 00:41:57,750 --> 00:42:00,458 我才剛認識你,就已經不喜歡你了 618 00:42:01,375 --> 00:42:02,666 一點都不喜歡 619 00:42:02,750 --> 00:42:05,750 連我女兒都知道怎麼剝生蠔 620 00:42:11,833 --> 00:42:14,708 警長,她有點煩躁,你有糖果嗎? 621 00:42:14,791 --> 00:42:17,500 老天,我是成年女人了,卡爾 622 00:42:17,583 --> 00:42:19,500 不需要別人教我要吃什麼 623 00:42:19,583 --> 00:42:20,541 吃個甜甜圈吧 624 00:42:21,625 --> 00:42:24,833 好的,我真的會吃,謝謝 625 00:42:24,916 --> 00:42:27,333 -你人真好 -我不需要甜甜圈 626 00:42:31,333 --> 00:42:32,833 夭壽 627 00:42:32,916 --> 00:42:34,500 -對吧? -別管什麼生蠔了 628 00:42:34,583 --> 00:42:37,125 這是我這輩子吃過最棒的甜甜圈了 629 00:42:39,000 --> 00:42:41,375 我愛死這女人了,你拍到了嗎? 630 00:42:47,083 --> 00:42:48,208 去開房間啦 631 00:42:49,125 --> 00:42:50,125 乾杯 632 00:42:50,208 --> 00:42:51,458 -乾杯 -乾杯 633 00:42:53,875 --> 00:42:55,583 哈囉,嗨 634 00:42:57,250 --> 00:42:58,416 大家好 635 00:43:00,291 --> 00:43:02,000 對,我要發言 636 00:43:07,583 --> 00:43:08,583 好熱情,感恩 637 00:43:09,375 --> 00:43:12,791 我是梅莉特摩納哥,艾米莉亞的伴娘 638 00:43:15,416 --> 00:43:19,000 歡迎來到艾米莉亞和班吉的彩排晚宴 639 00:43:21,708 --> 00:43:25,333 好高興今天能在這裡慶祝真愛 640 00:43:26,000 --> 00:43:30,666 我認識艾米莉亞後才了解何謂真愛 641 00:43:30,750 --> 00:43:32,750 我想世界上沒有其他人 642 00:43:32,833 --> 00:43:35,083 會跟我在電話上徹夜談心 643 00:43:35,166 --> 00:43:37,250 唸八卦專欄的文章,直到我睡著 644 00:43:39,208 --> 00:43:45,041 敬我完美的艾米莉亞 和她的班吉,我好愛你們 645 00:43:47,750 --> 00:43:50,166 一點也沒錯,敬你們,說得好 646 00:43:51,166 --> 00:43:55,833 你們有人早就知道了 我跟艾米莉亞是在動物園相識 647 00:43:55,916 --> 00:43:59,000 她在那裡工作,處理點心 648 00:43:59,083 --> 00:44:02,416 我在某個星期六幫朋友帶小孩 649 00:44:02,500 --> 00:44:04,166 我們決定去動物園 650 00:44:04,875 --> 00:44:10,208 然後艾米莉亞憑空出現 拿了一隻活老鼠餵食巨蟒 651 00:44:10,916 --> 00:44:13,708 她繼續熱情地講解 652 00:44:13,791 --> 00:44:15,250 而我看呆了 653 00:44:15,333 --> 00:44:18,583 我連續五個星期六都回去 654 00:44:19,166 --> 00:44:20,916 我一定要跟她聊聊 655 00:44:21,000 --> 00:44:25,375 所以我過去說:“所以你喜歡蛇?” 656 00:44:27,541 --> 00:44:32,333 她回說:“沒有 但我會告訴你我喜歡什麼” 657 00:44:32,416 --> 00:44:36,291 然後她讓我在員工餐廳請她喝咖啡 658 00:44:37,458 --> 00:44:39,708 她轉頭對我說 659 00:44:39,791 --> 00:44:42,083 “你知道企鵝… 660 00:44:43,666 --> 00:44:45,333 企鵝終身只有一個伴侶嗎?” 661 00:44:47,166 --> 00:44:50,041 我說:“本來不知道,現在知道了” 662 00:44:51,333 --> 00:44:52,708 然後我發現 663 00:44:52,791 --> 00:44:56,791 “等等,這五個星期以來 我變成一隻企鵝了” 664 00:44:58,000 --> 00:45:00,166 而艾米莉亞,就是我的終身伴侶 665 00:45:02,375 --> 00:45:05,916 我愛你,我等不及明天要娶你了 666 00:45:16,333 --> 00:45:17,625 我愛大家 667 00:45:35,916 --> 00:45:39,333 -你找你爸談了嗎? -我問過他了,沒問題 668 00:45:40,000 --> 00:45:42,875 布列斯福大樓只會保留公寓到月底 669 00:45:42,958 --> 00:45:45,666 -我知道,放心 -我得住進那間大樓 670 00:45:46,458 --> 00:45:48,791 -我需要提醒你我… -懷孕了? 671 00:45:49,916 --> 00:45:50,916 原來你懷孕了? 672 00:45:52,125 --> 00:45:54,208 對,安啦 673 00:45:54,291 --> 00:45:56,166 月底前喔 674 00:45:59,583 --> 00:46:00,583 天啊 675 00:46:06,916 --> 00:46:10,666 他去外面時,他媽媽在那裡翻垃圾 676 00:46:10,750 --> 00:46:14,791 他問:“媽,你在幹麼? 你又抽甲安了嗎?” 677 00:46:14,875 --> 00:46:16,625 她回說:“沒有,我在找假牙” 678 00:46:23,666 --> 00:46:26,791 嘿,老弟,那對拉子姐妹是怎樣? 679 00:46:26,875 --> 00:46:28,750 她們有搞過嗎? 680 00:46:33,916 --> 00:46:36,666 那不表示她不愛你 681 00:46:37,625 --> 00:46:39,041 我們都知道她是愛你的錢 682 00:46:39,125 --> 00:46:41,166 嘿,湯姆,閉嘴 683 00:46:41,250 --> 00:46:43,791 怎樣?她們都是為了錢結婚 684 00:46:44,875 --> 00:46:47,375 但起碼我老婆配得上豪門 685 00:46:48,958 --> 00:46:52,541 好幽默,他不找你當伴郎真是個謎 686 00:46:54,750 --> 00:46:55,833 哈哈,很好笑 687 00:46:55,916 --> 00:46:56,958 湯瑪斯 688 00:46:57,541 --> 00:46:58,541 去游個泳 689 00:46:59,416 --> 00:47:00,500 冷靜一下 690 00:47:01,208 --> 00:47:03,333 -沒事,我也許會去 -對,去吧 691 00:48:39,333 --> 00:48:41,083 梅莉特 692 00:48:45,666 --> 00:48:46,666 救命 693 00:48:49,000 --> 00:48:49,833 救命 694 00:48:51,458 --> 00:48:53,041 救命 695 00:48:54,291 --> 00:48:55,666 救命啊 696 00:48:58,458 --> 00:48:59,583 救命啊 697 00:50:34,208 --> 00:50:39,208 字幕翻譯: 李建華