Aha!
Aha.
(Giggling)
Those Grapes.
Give Me Those Grapes.
I Want The Grapes.
(Screaming)
Fun Is Fun, Denise, But I Want Those Grapes.
Forget It.
I'll Feed Them To You.
Okay.
Open Your Mouth. Open Your Mouth.
Close Your Eyes.
Ping.
(Growling)
My Woman.
Oh, Martin.
Isn't This Wonderful?
Yes.
Just You And Me.
Don't You Love It?
Yes, And I Love You.
I Love Your Parents For Taking Everybody Out.
Yes.
Finally, We're Home.
Oh, Man, I Thought We'd Never See Brooklyn Again.
But You Know, No Matter How Nice A Trip You Had
It's Always Good To Be Home.
You Don't Have To Talk To Me.
I Don't Have To Talk To You.
That's The Way I Prefer It, All Right?
If A Person Was Driving A Car
And The Gas Gauge Needle Moved To "E"
And The Little Light Came On
That Would Be A Clear Indication To Some Thinking Individual
That Perhaps The Gas Tank Is On Empty.
First I Have To Hear About This In The Car.
Now I'm Going To Hear About It In The House.
And I Told You That I Know When The Light Goes On "E"
That I Have Another 15 Miles.
We Only Went 12 Miles.
The Car Owes Me Another Three Miles.
Face It Dad, It Was Empty.
It Sputtered, It Died And You Killed It.
The Car Would Have Made It If It Wasn't For You All.
Us?
Yes.
I Told You Not To Take All That Luggage.
And Then You Bought All Those Souvenirs
And Every Time You All Went Into A Restaurant
You Ate 12,000 Pieces Of Food
And Made The Car Too Heavy.
You're Lucky It Wasn't An Airplane
Because When It's In Trouble
They Will Jettison Everything Off The Plane
That Isn't Absolutely Necessary.
I Love You All.
I Let You Stay In The Car.
So You're Saying You Saved Our Lives?
Yes, Because I Love My Family, And I'm A Wonderful Person.
You're Also Very Silly.
And You All Are Not Very Nice To Me
After I Brought You To Safety.
I Bet You Any Amount Of Money
I Can Drive 15 Miles If You Are Not With Me.
Hello, Martin, Denise.
How Was Your Weekend?
They're Back, Martin. It's Over.
Tell The Truth.
You Guys Had A Good Time.
All Right, We Wouldn't Be Crushed
If You Went Back To Mystic Seaport
For Another Night.
I Wouldn't Drive Them From Here To The Mailbox.
Oh, Please, You Probably Don't Have Enough Gas
To Get There Either.
Did You Run Out Of Gas Again?
Look, I Want To Talk To You About Something.
Martin.
Yes, Sir?
The Early Navigators, My Boy.
I Bought Some Maps Here.
Pull That Out.
Now, Look At How They Charted
And Look At How They Drew The World.
Now, Denise, Check This Out.
You Can See That Before They Took Off
This Is Their Idea Of What The World Looked Like To Them.
Then They Would Get Off The Ship
And See Some Natives Or Something...
You're Not Going To Get Me!
Okay, So I Lied.
Give Me Those Lips.
Rudy: ♪ Da-Da-Da-Dum ♪
♪ Da-Da-Da-Dum! ♪
Rudy!
Scared You, Huh?
Yeah.
It's From The Aquarium.
Get Out Before I Harpoon You.
Relax, Relax, Just A Little Bit Of Shark Humor.
♪ Da-Da-Da-Dum. ♪
Would You Go?!
(Sighing)
Didn't We Have The Best Weekend?
Yes, It Was Great.
Wouldn't You Like It To Be That Way
Every Time You Came Home?
Of Course.
Martin, Let's Get Our Own Apartment.
We Had The Chance To Get Base Housing.
You Got Cold Feet.
That Was A Year Ago.
I'm Ready Now.
Well, I'm All For It.
It Will Be Another Year Before Base Housing Opens Up.
Let's Get An Apartment Here In Brooklyn.
Yahhh!
Rudy!
Get Out!
Okay, Okay, Okay.
Let's Get The Classifieds.
Rudy: Yahhh!
(Denise Screaming)
Martin And Denise: Rudy!
(Ring)
Huxtable Residence.
Yes, Yes, Yes.
The Lady We Called About That Apartment.
What Does "Unique Two-Bedroom" Mean?
What?
The Other Bedroom
Is Across The Street?
Okay, Thank You.
What?
What Does That Mean?
Look, Denise
I've Got To Go Pick Up Olivia.
Let's Not Get Discouraged.
We Will Find Something Within Our Means.
And Do You Know Why?
Because We're Navy.
I'm Navy, You're Navy.
We Have A Navy Baby.
Like Those Guys In Your Father's Nautical Maps--
We Keep Going Until We Hit Land.
Who Discovered The New World?
Not The Air Force, Not The Army.
It Was The Navy.
The Blue And Gold!
Blue And Gold!
Navy!
Blue And Gold!
All Right!
All Right.
Now What Was That About?
We're Looking
For An Apartment.
Honey, You Know That You All Can Stay Here
As Long As You Like.
It's Time.
Martin And I Made Up Our Minds.
It's Just That
The Prices In These Papers Are Crazy.
You Want Me To Get You Another Paper?
Martin And I Want To Get Out Of Here.
We're Trapped.
We're Prisoners Here Until I Don't Know When.
No, Wait, Wait!
Look, It's Not Just In The Papers, Honey.
There Are Other Ways To Find Apartments.
What Do You Mean?
For Instance, I Know Of A Man Who Found An Apartment
Rent Control
Eight-Bedroom Apartment For $75 A Month, Yes.
Are You Being For Real?
You've Got To Talk To People.
Talk To The Pizza Boy
Whose Father Works In The Boiler Room
And Knows A Guy Who Delivers A Paper
To The 68-Year-Old Man
Who's Been In The Apartment For 125 Years.
He Wants To Go To Florida
So He Wants To Sublease
And Then You Get It For $125.
You Have To Talk To People.
You Have To Get Out And Circulate.
What If You Don't Know A Pizza Delivery Guy?
You Could Talk To Anybody.
You've Got To Circulate.
Get Yourself Out There.
Okay, All Right.
I'll Circulate.
Go Get 'Em!
I'm Just Going To Throw These Papers Out In The Trash.
Maybe If I Lock Them Out, They'll Stay Out.
Dr. Huxtable
Why Are Daddy And Denise Looking For An Apartment?
Oh, They're Looking For A New Home For You.
What's Wrong With Here?
Well, Sooner Or Later
People Have To Find Their Own Home.
It's Like The Law Of Nature.
I Want To Live Here Forever.
That's Right.
I Want To Grow Up Here And I Want To Get Married Here.
No, Dear, You Don't Want To Do That.
Yes, So You And Mrs. Huxtable Won't Be Lonely.
Trust Me.
Mrs. Huxtable And I Will Not Be Lonely.
Yes, You Will.
I Said We Won't.
We've Worked Hard
To Try And Get These Children Out Of This House.
I'm Not Leaving.
If You Want To Go, Fine.
I'm Not Going Anywhere.
This Is My House.
Good.
Then Can We Work Together?
Well, I Guess If You Put It That Way.
What Did You Have In Mind?
I'll Be A Doctor, Just Like You.
Oh, Really?
We'll Share Your Office
And Go To The Hospital Together Where They Grow The Babies.
We'll Take Your Car, But I'll Drive.
You Seem To Have This All Worked Out.
Sure Do.
You Deliver The Babies, Then I'll Take Care Of Them.
We'll Make
Mucho Dinero.
Well, Listen, You Know My Rule.
Anybody In This House That Brings A Paycheck Can Stay.
Deal, Doctor.
Yeah, You Can Stay Here.
Matter Of Fact
You're The Only One Who Can Stay Here.
Well, How Did It Go?
Awful. Not Bad.
Oh, I See.
We Looked At Six Apartments
Including This Penthouse.
This "Penthouse" Is A Converted Pigeon Coop.
Cinder Blocks And Plumbing On Top Of The Building.
I Don't Understand The Ads People Put In The Newspaper
And This Was The Best.
I'm Sorry.
I Have Two Days Left Of My Leave.
I'm Tired And I Would Like To Visit With My Daughter.
They Weren't That Bad.
He's Just Tired.
Hey, Denise, I Found A Place.
What? Where? How Much?
Oh, I Don't Know.
The Guy At The Espresso Stand
Was Complaining About His Wife's Psychic.
See, She Had Predicted
That They Would Move Into This Place In Brooklyn
But The Guy Didn't Want To Move To Brooklyn
So It's Still Available.
She Said That She Saw Something
That Was Very Unique And Really Cheap
And In Her Vision
She Almost Saw A Great View Of The River.
Hey, Here's The Address.
This Is Great.
Check This Out.
Thank You.
If Martin Asks Where I Went
Tell Him I Went To Find A Place And To Get My Palm Read.
She Almost Saw A Great View Of The River?
I Think Her Vision Was Blocked By A Big, Brick Bakeshop.
Yes! Yes!
It's Mine! It's Mine!
Yes! Yes!
It's Mine!
I Told You About All That Sugar, Didn't I?
Pardon Me
But This Is Not Your Room.
Yes, It Is.
Excuse Me.
Maybe I'm Getting Old
But The Room That You're Assigned To
Is Down The Hallway.
Let Me Refresh Your Memory.
Sit Down, Sit Down.
Yeah, Help Me.
True Or False?
When Theo Moved Out
You Said That I Would Get My Own Room.
True.
Butdenise And Martin
Moved In
And I'm In The Room With Olivia.
True.
Then You Said When Vanessa Went To College
I Would Get My Own Room, Again.
True, But
I Didn't Know That Cousin Pam Was Going To Live With Us.
I'll Make A Deal With You, Dad.
See, If You Give Me This Room...
Yes?
I'll Forget Everything.
Here.
What Is This?
It's A Lease.
A Lease For What?
For The Room.
You Have Rent Money?
Money?
Think About It.
The Psychic Said
That This Place Is Very Special.
The Man Who Owns This
Custom-Designed The Whole Interior.
Oh, And He Was A Navy Man
So That's Why I Thought We Would Like It.
Well, Now, We Mustn't Prejudge This.
Come On, Let's Keep An Open Mind.
So, According To The Floor Plan...
Oh, Well, We're In The Living Room.
And I Just Do A Little Something Like This...
Here's Our Dining Room.
This Whispers "Martin And Denise"?
It's Not The Amount Of Space.
It's What We Do With It.
This Will Be Our Place.
We Can Hang Pictures And Scatter Plants Around.
It Will Be A Whole New Thing.
What Kind Of Thing?
The Psychic Said This Would Be Your First Reaction.
Did The Psychic Say
This Would Be My Second Reaction?
Hey, Hey, Come On!
You're The One Who Told Me To Go Out
And Said, "We Won't Stop Until We Hit Land."
Well, This Is Land.
Okay, You're Right.
You're Absolutely Right.
Show Me The Rest.
Okay.
This Is Where We Sleep.
And Where Does Olivia Sleep?
Oh, I Just Pull This Out Like This.
Olivia Sleeps In A Drawer?!
This Is Not A Drawer.
It's A Bed Nook.
Look!
Aren't These Portholes Adorable?
Yes, Adorable.
And I Suppose
That This Is Our Wonderful Kitchen.
Now, Dear, It's A Galley.
You Know, Experts Say
That People Walk An Extra Three Miles
Because Of The Inefficiency Of The Modern Kitchen.
Think Of All The Time We Will Be Saving
And That We Could Spend With Olivia.
(Gasps)
And Our Company.
Company?
Company?!
Yes, Our Company.
Come On, There's Room.
The Owner Raised Three Children Here.
Three Children Slept Here.
Where?
Well, One.
Okay...
Two.
What?
Oh.
What Happens If You Get Hungry During The Night?
Do You Fold The Kid Up?
You Know, Martin
I Don't Think I Like Your Attitude.
All Right.
What Is This Thing?
What Do You Mean, What Is That?
That's A Shower, Martin.
In The Middle
Of The Living Room?!
It Is Not The Living Room
When You Do This.
Come On, That's Clever!
Denise, I Have Seen Enough.
I'm Ready To Go.
Martin, It's Only Temporarily.
You're Temporarily Crazy If You Think I'm Living Here.
You Have No Imagination!
And You Have No Sense.
Oh...
Ah!
Excuse Me.
Can I Get You Anything?
No, Thanks.
Want A Bite?
No, Thank You.
Want A Sip?
No, Thanks.
Stop It, Stop It.
Oh, Are We Amusing You Guys?
I Beg Your Pardon?
Yes, You Are.
You And The Refrigerator That Folds Down Into A Bed.
Wake Up Early In The Morning, Take A Shower
And Then Sit Down On Your Stove.
You Guys Should Have Seen Our First Place.
It Was Beautiful, Wasn't It, Cliff?
A Large, One-Bedroom...
Yes, It Was.
Completely Furnished...
With A Spiral Staircase.
And A Terrace.
Please.
Your Mother And I, Newly Married
Decided That We Would Rent A House.
Went To The Realtor.
The Man Had Drawings Of Five Houseboats.
We Wanted To Put Down The Whole Year's Rent
In Front Of The Man
And Then...
(Laughing)
What?
We Got To The Houseboat Around 10:30 That Night.
Had A Lovely Night.
And A Very Short One.
At Five Minutes To 6:00
There Was This...
(Blubbering)
And The Bed Moved And Things Went Across...
(Blubbering)
I Ran To The Window, Pulled Back The Curtain
And There Was The Whirling Blade Of A Helicopter.
And The People
Are Sitting This Far Away From Us.
With Their Newspapers.
There Are Six People Somewhere
Who Know What Your Mother Looks Like.
So, You're Still Here.
We're Sorry, Rudy.
You Didn't Try.
Now I Have To Go Back Up To That Room
And Live With That Four-Year-Old.
She Says She's Going To Live Here Forever.
You Better Watch It.
You Got One Angry Shark Up There.