1 00:01:16,030 --> 00:01:17,730 Aww, Shucks. 2 00:01:19,497 --> 00:01:21,497 Whooo-Hoo-Hoo! 3 00:01:21,497 --> 00:01:23,230 Oh, My Goodness. 4 00:01:23,230 --> 00:01:27,230 Dad, I'm Telling You, This Is Going To Be 5 00:01:27,230 --> 00:01:31,597 The Best Cliff's Ding-Dong, Eight-Alarm Chili 6 00:01:31,597 --> 00:01:34,430 Ever Tasted On The Face Of This Earth. 7 00:01:34,430 --> 00:01:38,030 Why Does It Take You Three Days To Make That Chili? 8 00:01:38,030 --> 00:01:41,130 If You Tasted This The First Day, You'd Say, 9 00:01:41,130 --> 00:01:43,297 "What Can Did This Come Out Of?" 10 00:01:43,297 --> 00:01:47,130 If You Tasted It On The Second Day, You'd Say, 11 00:01:47,130 --> 00:01:50,130 "Oh, My Goodness, Somebody's Grandmother Got Off Her Chair 12 00:01:50,130 --> 00:01:54,830 And Just Took This To The Mountain." 13 00:01:56,830 --> 00:01:58,164 But The Third Day... 14 00:01:58,164 --> 00:01:59,497 Wow, Ha, Ha, Ha. 15 00:01:59,497 --> 00:02:02,664 The Third Day, You Don't Even Have To Taste It. 16 00:02:02,664 --> 00:02:05,664 You Just Walk By The Pot And Someone Says; 17 00:02:05,664 --> 00:02:06,930 "Hey, Come Here." 18 00:02:06,930 --> 00:02:10,164 Sounds Delicious. 19 00:02:10,164 --> 00:02:11,564 It Is, It Is. 20 00:02:11,564 --> 00:02:13,030 Yeah. 21 00:02:13,030 --> 00:02:20,497 All I Have To Do Is Add The Rest Of These Herbs And Spices. 22 00:02:20,497 --> 00:02:26,097 Hey, Hey, Hey, Now This Truly Is Unbelievable. 23 00:02:26,097 --> 00:02:26,964 What's That? 24 00:02:26,964 --> 00:02:28,064 Guess Who's Playing 25 00:02:28,064 --> 00:02:30,564 At The Gaslight Club In The Village? 26 00:02:30,564 --> 00:02:33,530 Slim Claxton And His Trio. 27 00:02:33,530 --> 00:02:37,397 You Mean That Man Who Played The Xylophone, Wrote The Song 28 00:02:37,397 --> 00:02:41,564 "Baby, Don't Step On My Face 'Cause Your Shoes Got Nails"? 29 00:02:41,564 --> 00:02:43,430 That's Right. 30 00:02:43,430 --> 00:02:45,430 Yeah, Yeah. 31 00:02:45,430 --> 00:02:46,897 He Also Did 32 00:02:46,897 --> 00:02:49,530 "Don't Bring Home A Chicken When You Promised Me A Steak." 33 00:02:49,530 --> 00:02:50,830 ♪ Don't Bring Home A Chicken ♪ 34 00:02:50,830 --> 00:02:52,830 ♪ If You Promised Me A Steak ♪ 35 00:02:52,830 --> 00:02:54,830 Yeah, That's Right. 36 00:02:54,830 --> 00:02:58,830 I Met Slim 52 Years Ago In New Orleans. 37 00:02:58,830 --> 00:03:00,030 You're Kidding. 38 00:03:00,030 --> 00:03:02,864 I Try To See Him Whenever He's In Town. 39 00:03:02,864 --> 00:03:04,697 I Still Owe Him Money. 40 00:03:04,697 --> 00:03:08,464 Whenever I Try To Pay Him Back, He Refuses. 41 00:03:08,464 --> 00:03:12,564 I'm Going To Get Him This Time. 42 00:03:12,564 --> 00:03:17,064 I'll Call The Gaslight Club And See If Slim Is Down There Today. 43 00:03:17,064 --> 00:03:20,897 ♪ Don't Bring Home A Chicken If You Promised Me A Steak ♪ 44 00:03:20,897 --> 00:03:23,730 ♪ Don't Bring Home A Chicken If You Promised Me A Steak ♪ 45 00:03:28,697 --> 00:03:30,864 ( Whistle Blowing ) 46 00:03:36,997 --> 00:03:38,130 Hi, Vanessa. 47 00:03:38,130 --> 00:03:39,164 Hi, Kenny. 48 00:03:39,164 --> 00:03:40,364 What Are You Doing? 49 00:03:40,364 --> 00:03:43,197 Practicing To Be A Drum Major. There's A Trial At School Tomorrow. 50 00:03:43,197 --> 00:03:44,930 You Can't Be A Drum Major. 51 00:03:44,930 --> 00:03:45,730 Why Not? 52 00:03:45,730 --> 00:03:47,330 Drum Majors Are Boys. 53 00:03:47,330 --> 00:03:48,964 Who Says? 54 00:03:48,964 --> 00:03:51,530 I've Never Seen A Girl Drum Major. 55 00:03:51,530 --> 00:03:52,697 You're Fibbing. 56 00:03:52,697 --> 00:03:53,730 No, He Isn't. 57 00:03:53,730 --> 00:03:55,297 Most Drum Majors Are Boys. 58 00:03:55,297 --> 00:03:57,897 Ha, Ha, I Was Right. 59 00:03:57,897 --> 00:04:00,130 Burned You Bad. 60 00:04:00,130 --> 00:04:02,297 However, Some Girls Got Together At School 61 00:04:02,297 --> 00:04:04,297 And We Decided To Try Out. 62 00:04:04,297 --> 00:04:08,297 Since There Has Never Been A Girl Drum Major At Our School 63 00:04:08,297 --> 00:04:10,964 We Have To Be Great To Get Chosen. 64 00:04:10,964 --> 00:04:13,230 You Girls Shouldn't Be Doing This. 65 00:04:13,230 --> 00:04:14,130 Why Not? 66 00:04:14,130 --> 00:04:15,497 My Brother Says 67 00:04:15,497 --> 00:04:20,164 A Man Doesn't Want To See A Woman Doing A Man's Job 68 00:04:20,164 --> 00:04:23,097 Unless She's Wearing A Bathing Suit. 69 00:04:23,097 --> 00:04:27,297 I'll Go Out For Drum Major And Get It. 70 00:04:27,297 --> 00:04:32,030 That Band Will Be E E E Ing My Sister Down The Field, Bud. 71 00:04:33,730 --> 00:04:34,730 Thank You, Rudy. 72 00:04:34,730 --> 00:04:36,497 Would You Help Me Practice? 73 00:04:36,497 --> 00:04:37,730 Sure. 74 00:04:37,730 --> 00:04:41,430 I'd Ask You To Help, But A Man Can't Do This. 75 00:04:42,630 --> 00:04:45,197 Hold My Cassette Recorder 76 00:04:45,197 --> 00:04:48,030 And Make Sure No Matter Where I'm Marching 77 00:04:48,030 --> 00:04:50,164 You've Got It Pointed At Me. 78 00:04:50,164 --> 00:05:04,764 ( Marching Music ) 79 00:05:04,764 --> 00:05:07,297 Let's Hear It For The Band. 80 00:05:08,830 --> 00:05:10,997 Ah, Hon, Pardon Me, One Second. 81 00:05:10,997 --> 00:05:12,330 I Just... 82 00:05:12,330 --> 00:05:15,330 I Don't Mean To Take Anything Away From You 83 00:05:15,330 --> 00:05:18,330 But We Had A Fellow Named Peter Poindexter. 84 00:05:18,330 --> 00:05:20,164 He Was Six-Foot-Four. 85 00:05:20,164 --> 00:05:24,197 And Peter Poindexter Used To Come Out And: 86 00:05:24,197 --> 00:05:26,330 ♪ Da Da Di Di Di Da Boom ♪ 87 00:05:26,330 --> 00:05:28,730 ♪ Di Di Di Boom Di Doom Doom ♪ 88 00:05:28,730 --> 00:05:30,630 ♪ Di Di Di Doom Doom ♪ 89 00:05:30,630 --> 00:05:34,564 Peter Also Had That Double Step Back To The Side. 90 00:05:34,564 --> 00:05:37,364 ♪ Di Di Di Di Boom ♪ 91 00:05:37,364 --> 00:05:39,364 ♪ Di Di Di Bom Pa ♪ 92 00:05:39,364 --> 00:05:41,630 ♪ Wooja Da Da ♪ 93 00:05:42,464 --> 00:05:44,564 I'm Telling You, He Was Mean. 94 00:05:44,564 --> 00:05:45,530 I'm Sorry, Son. 95 00:05:45,530 --> 00:05:47,130 Peter Poindexter Was Good 96 00:05:47,130 --> 00:05:50,664 But He Was A Sad Imitation Of The Greatest Drum Major 97 00:05:50,664 --> 00:05:53,497 Ever To Strut Across A Football Field. 98 00:05:53,497 --> 00:05:55,830 I'm Talking About Tall Walter Lomax-- 99 00:05:55,830 --> 00:05:57,564 A Six-Foot, Eight-Inch... 100 00:05:57,564 --> 00:05:59,830 Six-Foot, Eight-Inch? 101 00:05:59,830 --> 00:06:02,097 ...Who At Homecoming Game Of 1934 102 00:06:02,097 --> 00:06:06,264 Gave Birth To The World Famous Triple Dip. 103 00:06:06,264 --> 00:06:08,230 ♪ Alafasa Sa-Sa-Sa ♪ 104 00:06:08,230 --> 00:06:10,264 ♪ Alafasa Sa-Sa-Sa ♪ 105 00:06:10,264 --> 00:06:12,664 ♪ Alafasa Sa-Sa-Sa ♪ 106 00:06:16,597 --> 00:06:17,764 But Peter Poindexter-- 107 00:06:17,764 --> 00:06:21,130 I Forgot, My Mind Fails Me Sometimes-- 108 00:06:21,130 --> 00:06:22,997 Was Actually 6'10". 109 00:06:22,997 --> 00:06:24,230 What He Did 110 00:06:24,230 --> 00:06:26,530 One Day At Half Time Was 111 00:06:26,530 --> 00:06:27,530 He Came Out... 112 00:06:27,530 --> 00:06:29,830 ♪ Di Di Di Boom Boom ♪ 113 00:06:29,830 --> 00:06:31,730 ♪ Zhoo! ♪ 114 00:06:31,730 --> 00:06:35,130 ...Threw Both Batons Up Into The Air 115 00:06:35,130 --> 00:06:38,164 Sang The Star-Spangled Banner 116 00:06:38,164 --> 00:06:41,464 Caught The Baton In The Right Hand 117 00:06:41,464 --> 00:06:44,064 On "The Home Of The Brave" 118 00:06:44,064 --> 00:06:48,564 And The Other Hand On "The Land Of The Free" 119 00:06:48,564 --> 00:06:49,964 Because He Sang It Backwards. 120 00:06:51,664 --> 00:06:56,464 I'm Afraid That Is Amateur Hour Compared With Tall Walter. 121 00:06:56,464 --> 00:06:58,330 At Half Time Of A Game 122 00:06:58,330 --> 00:07:04,964 Tall Walker, Who, As I Recall, Was At Least Seven-Foot-One... 123 00:07:06,330 --> 00:07:08,830 ...Led The Band Out Onto The Field 124 00:07:08,830 --> 00:07:12,364 With Long Strides That Took Up Ten Yards At A Clip. 125 00:07:12,364 --> 00:07:14,197 Ten Yards To A Stride? 126 00:07:14,197 --> 00:07:15,197 That's Right. 127 00:07:15,197 --> 00:07:16,830 When He Hit Midfield 128 00:07:16,830 --> 00:07:19,030 He Cut A Charleston Step 129 00:07:19,030 --> 00:07:22,530 And Threw His Baton Way Up In The Air. 130 00:07:22,530 --> 00:07:26,730 Just When Everybody Was Waiting For The Baton To Come Down 131 00:07:26,730 --> 00:07:29,464 Walter Led The Band Off The Field. 132 00:07:29,464 --> 00:07:32,597 He Let The Baton Fall On The Ground? 133 00:07:32,597 --> 00:07:34,064 No. 134 00:07:34,064 --> 00:07:35,230 A Week Later, 135 00:07:35,230 --> 00:07:38,997 Tall Walter Led The Band Out Onto The Same Field 136 00:07:38,997 --> 00:07:45,230 And The Baton That He Threw Up In The Air Seven Days Ago 137 00:07:45,230 --> 00:07:47,664 Came Right Down In His Hand. 138 00:07:49,597 --> 00:07:51,897 Grandpa, Is That A True Story? 139 00:07:51,897 --> 00:07:55,330 If I'm Lying, May I Be Hit By A Falling Baton. 140 00:08:03,597 --> 00:08:06,097 Hey, I Ain't Bad! 141 00:08:06,097 --> 00:08:08,930 Who Would Pay $12.50 To Hear That? 142 00:08:08,930 --> 00:08:10,930 Who's Out There Heckling Me? 143 00:08:10,930 --> 00:08:14,797 Do You Remember A Rainy Night In 1936 At The Club L'amour? 144 00:08:14,797 --> 00:08:17,664 Oh, My Goodness, If It Ain't Old Slide! 145 00:08:18,897 --> 00:08:21,130 How You Doing, Slide? 146 00:08:21,130 --> 00:08:22,330 You Look Good. 147 00:08:22,330 --> 00:08:23,697 It's Been Too Long. 148 00:08:23,697 --> 00:08:26,030 Slim, This Is My Son Heathcliff. 149 00:08:26,030 --> 00:08:27,097 How You Doing, Heathcliff? 150 00:08:27,097 --> 00:08:28,430 I've Heard A Lot About You. 151 00:08:28,430 --> 00:08:29,597 Whatever You've Heard 152 00:08:29,597 --> 00:08:33,164 Just Multiply It By 15, Divide It By 16 153 00:08:33,164 --> 00:08:34,830 And Then Ignore It. 154 00:08:34,830 --> 00:08:37,497 A Polite Person Would Invite Us To Sit. 155 00:08:37,497 --> 00:08:40,530 I'll See If I Can Find A Polite Person. 156 00:08:40,530 --> 00:08:42,564 Hey, Y'all, Come On, Sit Down. 157 00:08:42,564 --> 00:08:44,497 Y'all Want A Cup Of Coffee? 158 00:08:44,497 --> 00:08:47,097 You Still Drinking That Special Coffee Of Yours? 159 00:08:47,097 --> 00:08:48,797 Don't You Know It? 160 00:08:48,797 --> 00:08:50,064 Then I Think I'll Pass. 161 00:08:50,064 --> 00:08:51,730 What About You, Heathcliff? 162 00:08:51,730 --> 00:08:53,764 I'll Have A Little. 163 00:08:53,764 --> 00:08:55,897 I'll Pour You Out A Little. 164 00:08:55,897 --> 00:08:58,130 You're Really Going To Like This. 165 00:08:58,130 --> 00:08:59,330 Thank You. 166 00:09:01,930 --> 00:09:03,097 Whoa! 167 00:09:05,030 --> 00:09:06,730 How Do You Like It? 168 00:09:06,730 --> 00:09:09,030 I Can't Get To It. 169 00:09:10,964 --> 00:09:13,497 You Could Get Arrested For That. 170 00:09:13,497 --> 00:09:14,897 Ain't Gonna Bother Me. 171 00:09:14,897 --> 00:09:19,130 Is Claude Powers Still In Your Trio? 172 00:09:19,130 --> 00:09:20,564 Claude Powers? 173 00:09:20,564 --> 00:09:22,030 He's Been Dead Ten Years. 174 00:09:22,030 --> 00:09:24,130 No. 175 00:09:24,130 --> 00:09:25,030 How About Freddy Collins? 176 00:09:25,030 --> 00:09:26,364 He's Dead. 177 00:09:26,364 --> 00:09:29,264 Did You Ever Hear Anything About Choo-Choo Wallace? 178 00:09:29,264 --> 00:09:30,764 Yeah, He's Dead, Too. 179 00:09:30,764 --> 00:09:32,864 What About Skip Logan? 180 00:09:32,864 --> 00:09:33,797 Dead. 181 00:09:33,797 --> 00:09:35,764 How About The Tannen Brothers? 182 00:09:35,764 --> 00:09:37,997 Dead, Dead And Dead. 183 00:09:37,997 --> 00:09:40,130 But There Were Four Of Them. 184 00:09:40,130 --> 00:09:42,964 I Know It--He's Dead, Too. 185 00:09:42,964 --> 00:09:46,664 You Know, Slim, I've Been Reading About You For Years. 186 00:09:46,664 --> 00:09:49,664 You're Out There On Tour, Playing Your Music 187 00:09:49,664 --> 00:09:51,330 Going Strong. 188 00:09:51,330 --> 00:09:52,664 I'm Proud Of You. 189 00:09:52,664 --> 00:09:55,197 That's A Fine Compliment Coming From A Man 190 00:09:55,197 --> 00:09:56,630 Who Plays The Horn 191 00:09:56,630 --> 00:09:57,864 Sweeter Than Gabriel. 192 00:09:57,864 --> 00:09:59,897 I'm Retired Now. 193 00:09:59,897 --> 00:10:00,597 If I Had Your Money 194 00:10:00,597 --> 00:10:02,130 I'd Retire, Too. 195 00:10:02,130 --> 00:10:04,397 No, I Never Made That Much Money. 196 00:10:04,397 --> 00:10:06,364 Nobody Said You Made Money. 197 00:10:06,364 --> 00:10:07,897 They Said You Never 198 00:10:07,897 --> 00:10:09,130 Let Go Of It. 199 00:10:09,130 --> 00:10:13,397 If I Am So Tight, Why Am I About To Hand You 200 00:10:13,397 --> 00:10:14,497 A $100 Bill? 201 00:10:14,497 --> 00:10:16,730 You Remember I Owe You This Money? 202 00:10:16,730 --> 00:10:18,864 I Sure Do-- 203 00:10:18,864 --> 00:10:19,997 To Buy Anna Her Wedding Ring. 204 00:10:19,997 --> 00:10:23,097 I Never Told You This, But 51 Years Ago 205 00:10:23,097 --> 00:10:25,697 I Played A Club, And The Owner 206 00:10:25,697 --> 00:10:28,097 Stiffed The Band For A Week's Salary. 207 00:10:28,097 --> 00:10:31,597 I Had No Money To Buy Your Mother A Ring. 208 00:10:31,597 --> 00:10:33,730 Slim Heard It 209 00:10:33,730 --> 00:10:36,664 Came Over To The Hotel To Offer His Condolences. 210 00:10:36,664 --> 00:10:39,030 When He Left 211 00:10:39,030 --> 00:10:42,464 I Found A $100 Bill In My Coat Pocket. 212 00:10:42,464 --> 00:10:46,797 And This Time, You Are Going To Take The Money. 213 00:10:46,797 --> 00:10:49,564 Ain't No Way I'll Take That Money. 214 00:10:49,564 --> 00:10:50,564 I Insist. 215 00:10:50,564 --> 00:10:51,330 You Might Insist 216 00:10:51,330 --> 00:10:53,097 But I'll Resist. 217 00:10:53,097 --> 00:10:54,830 Why Won't You Take It? 218 00:10:54,830 --> 00:10:56,464 'Cause I'd Be Cursed. 219 00:10:56,464 --> 00:10:59,364 You Remember That Old Hatchet-Faced Lady In Louisiana 220 00:10:59,364 --> 00:11:01,764 Who Told All Those Fortunes? 221 00:11:01,764 --> 00:11:03,330 You Mean Madame Carla? 222 00:11:03,330 --> 00:11:05,130 That's Right. 223 00:11:05,130 --> 00:11:08,830 She Said If I Went Out And Gave People Money 224 00:11:08,830 --> 00:11:11,430 I'd Have Good Fortune My Whole Life. 225 00:11:11,430 --> 00:11:15,497 Ever Since I Gave That Little Money To You And Your Wife 226 00:11:15,497 --> 00:11:18,397 I Ain't Had Nothing But The Best Of Luck 227 00:11:18,397 --> 00:11:19,864 And I'm Knocking On Wood. 228 00:11:21,664 --> 00:11:23,164 Shoot, That Ain't Wood. 229 00:11:23,164 --> 00:11:25,097 It's Famildahide. 230 00:11:25,097 --> 00:11:28,097 Yeah, But You Don't Seem To Understand, Slim. 231 00:11:28,097 --> 00:11:29,630 When I Borrow Money 232 00:11:29,630 --> 00:11:31,497 I Always Pay It Back. 233 00:11:31,497 --> 00:11:33,864 You Give It To Your Son. 234 00:11:33,864 --> 00:11:35,697 He Looks Like He Can Use It. 235 00:11:35,697 --> 00:11:37,264 My Son's A Doctor. 236 00:11:37,264 --> 00:11:38,930 You A Doctor?! 237 00:11:39,897 --> 00:11:41,430 How About Lending Me $1,500 Dollars? 238 00:11:42,330 --> 00:11:44,397 No, But I'll Tell You What. 239 00:11:44,397 --> 00:11:47,464 You Can Join My Father And Me On Friday. 240 00:11:47,464 --> 00:11:49,764 I Cooked Some Special Hot Chili. 241 00:11:49,764 --> 00:11:51,230 I Got Four Shows Friday. 242 00:11:51,230 --> 00:11:52,664 That's A Big Day. 243 00:11:52,664 --> 00:11:54,097 How Early Should We Eat? 244 00:11:54,097 --> 00:11:56,430 Let's Say 6:00, A.O.C. 245 00:11:56,430 --> 00:11:58,164 All Right. Bring Your Special Coffee. 246 00:11:58,164 --> 00:11:59,230 You Know It! 247 00:11:59,230 --> 00:12:01,597 We'll Talk Loud And Draw A Crowd! 248 00:12:01,597 --> 00:12:02,630 I Hear Ya. 249 00:12:02,630 --> 00:12:03,630 Thank You. 250 00:12:13,864 --> 00:12:16,230 Hey, Vanessa, How Was The Tryout? 251 00:12:17,130 --> 00:12:19,730 Wait, Vanessa, Come On. 252 00:12:19,730 --> 00:12:22,430 You've Got To Tell Me About This. 253 00:12:22,430 --> 00:12:25,264 I Am So Mad, I Could Hit Somebody. 254 00:12:26,264 --> 00:12:27,297 Oww! 255 00:12:27,297 --> 00:12:29,097 What Was That For? 256 00:12:29,097 --> 00:12:30,397 Because You're A Guy. 257 00:12:30,397 --> 00:12:31,630 What's Wrong With You? 258 00:12:31,630 --> 00:12:33,730 They Didn't Pick Me For Drum Major. 259 00:12:33,730 --> 00:12:35,730 I Was Robbed Royally. 260 00:12:35,730 --> 00:12:37,497 Why Are You Hitting Me? 261 00:12:37,497 --> 00:12:41,164 Because Three Of The Four Judges On The Committee Were Guys. 262 00:12:41,164 --> 00:12:44,030 Those Guys Picked Another Guy To Be Drum Major 263 00:12:44,030 --> 00:12:46,197 Even Though He Dropped The Baton Twice. 264 00:12:51,764 --> 00:12:54,764 Amy Was Looking At Me The Whole Time. 265 00:12:54,764 --> 00:12:55,797 Get Out! 266 00:12:55,797 --> 00:12:57,764 She Was Looking Over You At Me. 267 00:12:57,764 --> 00:12:58,764 In Your Dreams. 268 00:12:58,764 --> 00:13:01,264 Yo, What's Up? 269 00:13:01,264 --> 00:13:02,797 What Are You Doing Here So Late? 270 00:13:02,797 --> 00:13:03,864 Wrestling Practice. 271 00:13:03,864 --> 00:13:06,097 You Guys Went Out For Drum Major? 272 00:13:06,097 --> 00:13:07,230 Are You Serious? 273 00:13:07,230 --> 00:13:09,430 We Were The Judges. 274 00:13:09,430 --> 00:13:11,097 You Guys Were Judges? 275 00:13:11,097 --> 00:13:13,664 They Picked Judges From The Band. 276 00:13:13,664 --> 00:13:16,164 How Did The Tryouts Go? 277 00:13:16,164 --> 00:13:17,097 Pretty Good. 278 00:13:17,097 --> 00:13:18,097 You See Vanessa? 279 00:13:18,097 --> 00:13:19,097 You Know It. 280 00:13:19,097 --> 00:13:20,997 Your Sister Is Looking Good. 281 00:13:20,997 --> 00:13:22,997 Amy Dressler Looking Even Better. 282 00:13:22,997 --> 00:13:25,864 Did You See Those Shorts She Had On? 283 00:13:25,864 --> 00:13:30,497 I'd Stay An Extra Year In School Just To Be Next To Her. 284 00:13:30,497 --> 00:13:32,430 How Did My Sister Do? 285 00:13:32,430 --> 00:13:33,730 Pretty Good, I Guess. 286 00:13:33,730 --> 00:13:35,664 Weren't You Paying Attention? 287 00:13:35,664 --> 00:13:37,430 Sure, We Were Paying Attention. 288 00:13:37,430 --> 00:13:38,864 Everyone Got A Fair Shot. 289 00:13:38,864 --> 00:13:41,130 We Picked The Right Guy. 290 00:13:41,130 --> 00:13:44,964 Sounds To Me Like No Matter How Good The Girls Were 291 00:13:44,964 --> 00:13:47,230 You Would Have Picked A Guy Anyway. 292 00:13:47,230 --> 00:13:49,230 You Catch On Pretty Fast. 293 00:13:49,230 --> 00:13:51,330 At Least We Let The Girls Try Out. 294 00:13:51,330 --> 00:13:54,097 Those Girls Should Have Been Thanking Us. 295 00:13:54,097 --> 00:13:55,730 You Know It. 296 00:13:55,730 --> 00:13:57,330 Later, Theo. 297 00:13:57,330 --> 00:13:58,897 Say Hi To Vanessa. 298 00:13:58,897 --> 00:14:01,364 Tell Her I Enjoyed What She Did. 299 00:14:10,864 --> 00:14:14,930 You Are Now Ready, My Sweet. 300 00:14:16,064 --> 00:14:19,450 Ready Now 301 00:14:19,450 --> 00:14:24,164 For The Hottest Chili Peppers On The Face Of This Earth. 302 00:14:24,164 --> 00:14:25,464 One... Argh! 303 00:14:25,464 --> 00:14:27,397 Argh! 304 00:14:27,397 --> 00:14:29,730 Ahhh! 305 00:14:29,730 --> 00:14:30,997 More Chili! 306 00:14:30,997 --> 00:14:32,997 Owww! 307 00:14:32,997 --> 00:14:37,264 ( Laughing Like A Mad Scientist ) 308 00:14:37,264 --> 00:14:41,230 Ahhh! 309 00:14:41,230 --> 00:14:45,064 Now To Stir It Up. 310 00:14:45,064 --> 00:14:49,230 Daddy, Can You Help Me Get The Encyclopedia Off The Shelf? 311 00:14:49,230 --> 00:14:51,964 Are You Hiding A Note From Your Teacher? 312 00:14:51,964 --> 00:14:53,464 No, I'm Doing Homework. 313 00:14:53,464 --> 00:14:58,397 Okay, As Soon As I Finish With The Chili. 314 00:14:58,397 --> 00:14:59,964 Can I Have A Taste? 315 00:14:59,964 --> 00:15:04,264 I Just Put In Six Of The Hottest Chili Peppers On This Earth 316 00:15:04,264 --> 00:15:05,597 And Swirled It Around. 317 00:15:05,597 --> 00:15:07,830 If They Don't Cook For Two Hours 318 00:15:07,830 --> 00:15:10,164 When You Taste This, Your Face Will Go 319 00:15:10,164 --> 00:15:11,164 Umph! 320 00:15:11,164 --> 00:15:12,464 Fire Will Shoot Out 321 00:15:12,464 --> 00:15:14,464 And You'll Go Running. 322 00:15:14,464 --> 00:15:15,997 You'll Say "Aaaaah!" 323 00:15:15,997 --> 00:15:19,030 Flames Will Shoot Out, And You'll Run To Peter's. 324 00:15:19,030 --> 00:15:20,864 He'll Grab The Fire Extinguisher 325 00:15:20,864 --> 00:15:24,430 Foam Will Be All Over, And He'll Put A Cherry On Top 326 00:15:24,430 --> 00:15:26,797 And They'll Sell You In The Drugstore. 327 00:15:26,797 --> 00:15:29,164 Okay, I'll Wait. 328 00:15:29,164 --> 00:15:32,330 Let's Go Find That Encyclopetamin? 329 00:15:32,330 --> 00:15:33,597 Encyclopedia! 330 00:15:33,597 --> 00:15:34,897 You Say That So Beautifully. 331 00:15:34,897 --> 00:15:36,130 Say It Again. 332 00:15:36,130 --> 00:15:37,464 Encyclopedia. 333 00:16:05,430 --> 00:16:06,430 Ooh! 334 00:16:59,097 --> 00:17:03,164 I Told You To Stay Out Of My Chili! 335 00:17:07,597 --> 00:17:09,564 Mom. 336 00:17:09,564 --> 00:17:10,864 Yes? 337 00:17:10,864 --> 00:17:12,730 Tell Me You're Proud Of Me. 338 00:17:12,730 --> 00:17:13,864 I'm Proud Of You. 339 00:17:13,864 --> 00:17:16,264 Now Let Me Tell You Why You're Proud. 340 00:17:16,264 --> 00:17:20,030 I Found Out Vanessa Did Not Get Drum Major Yesterday 341 00:17:20,030 --> 00:17:23,164 Because The Judges Planned To Pick A Guy All Along. 342 00:17:23,164 --> 00:17:24,830 So I Went 343 00:17:24,830 --> 00:17:26,697 And Told The Principal. 344 00:17:26,697 --> 00:17:28,030 And Tonight 345 00:17:28,030 --> 00:17:30,864 Because Of Yours Truly, Theodore Aloysius Huxtable 346 00:17:30,864 --> 00:17:32,597 They're Having New Tryouts 347 00:17:32,597 --> 00:17:36,497 And New Judges-- Two Guys And Two Girls. 348 00:17:36,497 --> 00:17:38,097 Theo, I Am Very Proud. 349 00:17:38,097 --> 00:17:41,730 Mom, This Is Unbelievable. 350 00:17:41,730 --> 00:17:43,097 Mind-Boggling. 351 00:17:43,097 --> 00:17:44,097 Beyond Tremendous. 352 00:17:44,097 --> 00:17:45,197 Yes? 353 00:17:45,197 --> 00:17:48,330 The Principal Announced New Tryouts 354 00:17:48,330 --> 00:17:49,664 For Drum Major. 355 00:17:49,664 --> 00:17:50,997 No. 356 00:17:50,997 --> 00:17:52,397 I Know How It Happened. 357 00:17:52,397 --> 00:17:53,264 How? 358 00:17:53,264 --> 00:17:55,864 Word Must Have Gotten Out 359 00:17:55,864 --> 00:17:57,430 About How Good I Was. 360 00:17:57,430 --> 00:17:58,997 A Bunch Of Students 361 00:17:58,997 --> 00:18:01,530 Forced The Principal To Give Me Another Chance. 362 00:18:01,530 --> 00:18:04,497 I'm Good, But I Didn't Know I Was A Legend. 363 00:18:04,497 --> 00:18:05,964 I'm Going Upstairs To Practice. 364 00:18:05,964 --> 00:18:07,630 I Got To Tell You Something. 365 00:18:07,630 --> 00:18:08,997 What? 366 00:18:10,397 --> 00:18:11,530 Good Luck. 367 00:18:11,530 --> 00:18:12,530 Thanks. 368 00:18:12,530 --> 00:18:15,164 Oh, Theo? 369 00:18:15,164 --> 00:18:17,530 I'm Sorry I Hit You. 370 00:18:17,530 --> 00:18:18,697 It's Okay. 371 00:18:25,497 --> 00:18:29,264 Theodore Huxtable, You Are Beyond Tremendous. 372 00:18:30,697 --> 00:18:31,697 Mom. 373 00:18:31,697 --> 00:18:32,697 Yes? 374 00:18:32,697 --> 00:18:34,664 You've Been In Dad's Chili. 375 00:18:38,964 --> 00:18:43,097 Do You Have Time To Stay Before You Go To The Club? 376 00:18:43,097 --> 00:18:45,964 Dad-Gum Right I Have, Shoot. 377 00:18:45,964 --> 00:18:47,130 Hey, Doc! 378 00:18:47,130 --> 00:18:47,964 Yes, Sir? 379 00:18:47,964 --> 00:18:49,564 Know What I'd Like? 380 00:18:49,564 --> 00:18:50,430 What? 381 00:18:50,430 --> 00:18:53,597 A Stinky, Goat Rope Cigar. 382 00:18:53,597 --> 00:18:55,930 You Seem To Enjoy Yourself, Slim. 383 00:18:55,930 --> 00:18:58,064 That's Because I Love Being Old. 384 00:18:58,064 --> 00:18:59,230 You Don't Know 385 00:18:59,230 --> 00:19:00,430 What You're Missing. 386 00:19:00,430 --> 00:19:01,430 I Don't? 387 00:19:01,430 --> 00:19:02,830 You Know What They Say 388 00:19:02,830 --> 00:19:04,797 About Women Living Longer Than Men? 389 00:19:04,797 --> 00:19:06,030 It Sure Is Right. 390 00:19:06,030 --> 00:19:08,697 Let Me Tell You, I'm Reaping That Harvest. 391 00:19:08,697 --> 00:19:11,564 I Go To Them Senior Citizen Dances 392 00:19:11,564 --> 00:19:14,230 And Dance All Night With Them Widows. 393 00:19:14,230 --> 00:19:16,297 They Consider Me A Real Stud! 394 00:19:17,464 --> 00:19:19,597 Never Did Get Married, Did You? 395 00:19:19,597 --> 00:19:22,864 Shoot, I'm Still Sowing My Oats. 396 00:19:22,864 --> 00:19:25,430 Well, Okay. 397 00:19:25,430 --> 00:19:26,830 I Have To Mosey. 398 00:19:26,830 --> 00:19:30,197 I Like To Get There Early And Make Some Fresh Coffee. 399 00:19:30,197 --> 00:19:31,864 I'll Get Your Coat. 400 00:19:31,864 --> 00:19:33,630 Okay, Thank You. 401 00:19:33,630 --> 00:19:37,597 I Got To Get My Thermos. 402 00:19:37,597 --> 00:19:39,530 Quite A Guy, Your Friend Slim. 403 00:19:39,530 --> 00:19:41,397 Quick, Give Me His Coat. 404 00:19:41,397 --> 00:19:44,564 I'll Slip This $100 I Owe Him Into His Pocket. 405 00:19:44,564 --> 00:19:45,697 Wait A Minute. 406 00:19:45,697 --> 00:19:49,030 You Heard What He Said About The Curse. 407 00:19:49,030 --> 00:19:52,364 Madame Carla Was The Biggest Con Artist In New Orleans. 408 00:19:52,364 --> 00:19:54,730 She Told Every Man Who Came To Her 409 00:19:54,730 --> 00:19:58,864 If He Gave Money To Someone In Need, It Would Bring Luck. 410 00:19:58,864 --> 00:20:02,997 Then One Of Her Shills Would Go Up To That Man And Say: 411 00:20:02,997 --> 00:20:04,730 "Hey, Buddy, I'm In Need." 412 00:20:04,730 --> 00:20:06,130 Say No More. 413 00:20:06,130 --> 00:20:09,830 I Want To Thank You For A Wonderful Evening. 414 00:20:09,830 --> 00:20:11,930 It's Been Our Pleasure. 415 00:20:11,930 --> 00:20:13,830 I Sure Do Appreciate It. 416 00:20:13,830 --> 00:20:15,164 I Want You To Remember 417 00:20:15,164 --> 00:20:16,997 Tomorrow Night At The Club 418 00:20:16,997 --> 00:20:19,064 You'll Get The Best Seat In The House. 419 00:20:19,064 --> 00:20:20,030 Where? 420 00:20:20,030 --> 00:20:21,797 Right In Back Of That Pole. 421 00:20:21,797 --> 00:20:23,497 We'll Be There. 422 00:20:23,497 --> 00:20:25,797 Hi, Vanessa. 423 00:20:25,797 --> 00:20:27,064 Hi, Everybody. 424 00:20:27,064 --> 00:20:28,730 This Is My Daughter Vanessa. 425 00:20:28,730 --> 00:20:29,730 Hi, Vanessa. 426 00:20:29,730 --> 00:20:30,797 Just Call Me Slim. 427 00:20:30,797 --> 00:20:32,130 Nice To Meet You. 428 00:20:32,130 --> 00:20:33,397 Hi, Grandpa. 429 00:20:33,397 --> 00:20:34,630 How Was The Tryout? 430 00:20:34,630 --> 00:20:36,130 Terrible. 431 00:20:36,130 --> 00:20:38,464 I Was Good, Dad, I Really Was. 432 00:20:38,464 --> 00:20:40,830 But I Still Won't Be Drum Major. 433 00:20:40,830 --> 00:20:41,764 Who Won? 434 00:20:41,764 --> 00:20:43,797 A Girl Who Was Six-Foot-Three. 435 00:20:43,797 --> 00:20:47,097 She Showed Up From Nowhere And Wiped Out Everybody. 436 00:20:47,097 --> 00:20:49,164 You Feel Mighty Bad, Don't You, Sweetie? 437 00:20:49,164 --> 00:20:50,630 I Sure Do. 438 00:20:50,630 --> 00:20:52,564 I Have Something You'll Really Like 439 00:20:52,564 --> 00:20:54,897 And Your Grandpa Would Like You 440 00:20:54,897 --> 00:20:56,597 To Have It, Too. 441 00:20:56,597 --> 00:21:01,130 Don't Go Spend It All In One Place, You Hear? 442 00:21:01,130 --> 00:21:02,930 A Hundred Dollars?! 443 00:21:02,930 --> 00:21:04,330 For Your Piggy Bank. 444 00:21:04,330 --> 00:21:06,130 Thank You So Much! 445 00:21:10,297 --> 00:21:12,297 Oh, You Old Sucker! 446 00:21:15,597 --> 00:21:17,330 Oh, You Sucker, You!