Mom, I Brought You Some Warm Milk And Cookies.
Thank You, Sweetheart.
It Might Help Calm You Down.
I Am Calm.
Even Though Your Son's In Jail?
Vanessa, Theo Is Not In Jail.
He's Just At The Police Station.
Let's Not Jump To Conclusions.
Okay.
Mom?
Yes.
Is Theo Still In Jail?
Rudy, Theo Is Not In Jail.
He's Only Been Arrested.
Theo Has Not Been Arrested.
He's Just At The Police Station.
Why?
Because The Friend
He Was With Drove Too Fast
And The Friend Only Had A Learner's Permit.
I Thought You And Dad Grounded Theo Last Week
For Cutting Class.
Yes, But He Had Permission To Go To The Library.
He's At A Police Station In Coney Island?
That's Right...
And For His Sake
I Hope There's A Good Library In Coney Island.
Are You Mad At Theo?
Honey, This Is A Matter Between Theo And Your Father And Me.
Let's Just Say Good Night.
Yeah. Good Night, Rudy.
And Good Night, Vanessa.
I'll Stay Up And Keep You Company.
I'll Keep You Company, Too.
That Is Not Why You Want To Be Down Here.
Come On, Let's Go.
Aww, Man.
We're Going.
Don't Worry, Rudy.
We'll Hear The Yelling In Our Bedrooms.
Good.
Sorry, Mom.
Theo, I'm Not Accepting That Apology
Until I've Heard All The Facts.
Tom Lauck Picked Me Up In His Dad's Car To Go To The Library.
Tom Lauck Has No Driver's License.
He Has A Permit.
They Were The Only People In The Car--
Two Permits, Driving Around Aiming At People.
Tom Promised He'd Drive Real Slow.
You're Supposed To Have A Licensed Driver
In The Car With You.
I Know, But We Weren't Going Far.
Coney Island Is Ten Miles Away.
Did You Even Get Near The Library?
Sure. We Went In And Put Down Our Books.
Then We Went Out For A Hot Dog.
So The Library Was A Cover-Up For This Trip To Coney Island.
There You Go.
On The Way Back
Tom Accidentally Ran Through The Red Light.
Uh-Huh.
We Heard A Siren.
A Police Car Came At Us With His Lights Flashing.
I Said, "Uh-Oh, It's The Cops."
Tom Freaked Out.
He Hit The Pedal, And We Were Off.
You Tried To Outrun The Police?
Don't Worry, Mom.
I Had My Seat Belt On The Whole Time.
The Chase Only Lasted Three Blocks.
Tom Slowed Down
And The Policeman Got On The Loudspeaker
And Ordered Him To Pull Over.
That Freaked Him Out Again.
He Jerked The Steering Wheel, Jumped The Curb
And Hit A Stop Sign.
Theo, I've Heard Enough.
Give Me And Your Father A Few Minutes
To Discuss Your Punishment
Then Come Back Down.
Yes, Mom.
Hey, Dad...
Am I Really In That Much Trouble?
Let Me Tell You Something.
When We Go Into The Kitchen
You Can Go Out And Get In My Car.
You Can Drive Backwards To Coney Island
Run Over The Hot Dog Man And Two Stop Signs
And You Won't Be In Any More Trouble Than You Are Now.
It Doesn't Get Easier, Does It?
Cliff, Something Has Gotten Into Him Lately.
I Think It All Started When He Began To Shave.
I Have To Tell Theo To Do Something Ten Times
Then Go Behind Him And Make Sure He's Done It.
He Took My Razor And Used My Last Blade.
Yesterday He Took My Car
With A Friend Who Has A Driver's License.
I Asked That He Put Gas In The Car.
I Gave Him Gas Money.
He Didn't Put Gas In The Car
Never Returned The Money.
I Ran Out Of Gas Driving To Work.
For Somebody To Take Your Last Blade
And Not Tell You About It...
Cliff...
Are You Listening?
Yeah, I Was Listening.
You Know About The Gas.
What About It?
You're Not Listening To Me.
Why Would You Say You're Listening To Me
If You Weren't Listening?
Because I Was Thinking About The Boy.
I Was Talking About Him.
I Thought You Were Talking About Your Car.
I Was Talking About What Theo Did To My Car.
You Weren't Listening.
You Weren't Listening To Me.
Yes, I Was.
Quote Me.
You Know What You Said.
There You Go.
You Weren't Listening To Me.
I Was Talking About The Boy And Shaving
And Nicking My Face.
Cliff, I Could Have Been Stranded Somewhere.
Are You Telling Me
That A Nick On Your Face Is As Important
As Your Wife Being Stranded Somewhere At Night
On A Country Road, Alone
In The Pouring Rain And The Howling Winds?
When Was All This Going On?
I Was Making A Point.
Yeah, Well, Your Point Is Untrue And Fabricated.
You Think A Nick On Your Face Gives You A Point?
You Nick Your Face All The Time.
You Would Nick Your Face Without A Razor.
Nick, Nick, Nick.
I Don't Think You Have Reason To Be Upset With Me.
How Would You Know?
You Weren't Even Listening
Or You Would Know
That I Should Be Upset.
And You Should Be Upset With Me.
I Don't Need Anybody To Tell Me
When I Should Be Upset With Somebody.
If I Decide To Get Upset With Somebody
I Will Make That Decision To Be Upset With Somebody.
Nobody Can Tell Me When To Get Upset With Somebody.
I Get Upset When I'm Ready To Get Upset...
...And I'm Upset Now.
Uh...
Mom, Dad...
What Do You Want?
I Came Down For My Punishment.
I Don't Think This Is The Right Time, Son.
Aren't You Giving It To Me Tonight?
I Wouldn't Be So Eager, Theo.
I'm Not Eager, Mom.
I Just Wanted To Get It Over With Tonight.
Why?
My Grounding Ends On Saturday
And I Hoped I Could Go To A Party At Lana's House.
You Have The Arrogance To Inform Me
That You Are Going To A Party
When Your Father Just Brought You Home From The Jailhouse?
Go To Your Room.
I Think That Boy Has Lost His Mind.
Sondra And Denise Didn't Act Like This.
Why Is He Like This?
He's A Boy, And Boys Go Through That Kind Of Thing.
Are You Saying That This Is Natural?
That We Should Excuse This Behavior
Because He's Male?
That's Not What I'm Saying.
What Are You Saying?
I'm Not Saying Anything.
Whatever You Say, That's What Is Going To Be Said.
Please Don't Do That.
Don't Patronize Me Like That.
"Whatever You Say Is Going To Be What's Said."
That's Not Right.
You Should Say What You Want To Say
But Don't Say That.
That Is So Beneath You.
Let's Talk About Whatever It Is We're Angry About
In The Morning
And Get Some Sleep.
Neither Of Us Will Be Sleeping Any Time Soon.
Why Not?
When We Married
We Promised We'd Never Go To Sleep Angry.
We Were Younger Then.
We Didn't Need As Much Sleep.
Cliff...
All Right.
Let's Count To Three And Then Stop Being Angry.
That's Not Enough.
There Has To Be An Apology First.
Okay, I Accept Your Apology.
Oh, No, No.
You Owe Me The Apology.
For What?
For Getting Us Both Upset.
You Got Us Upset First.
Where's My Apology?
Are You Suggesting That I Owe You An Apology?!
You Better Believe It.
I'm Just Saying One More Thing.
What?
We Are Going To Sleep Angry.
That Doesn't Bother Me.
If It Don't Bother Me And It Don't Bother You
It Don't Bother Me.
I Didn't Want The Covers, Anyway.
And Another Thing Is
I Was In The Navy
And I Slept Closer Than This To The Enemy.
Here's A Story About Two High School Guys
Who Robbed A Grocery Store.
Is Theo's Name In It?
No, He Didn't Do Anything That Big.
Keep Looking.
I Know It's Here.
Janet Says That Every Day
They Publish A List Of Everyone Who's Been Arrested.
Maybe Theo Used A Fake Name.
Yeah, I'll Look Under John Doe.
Then Try Theo Doe.
Hey, Theo, What Name
Did You Give The Police?
What Are You Talking About?
When They Booked You.
They Didn't Book Me.
I Waited At The Police Station Till Dad Came.
What Did Mom And Dad Do?
Nothing.
They Started Arguing And Forgot Me.
Really?
I Haven't Even Been Punished Yet.
When They Stop Arguing, You Are Going To Get It.
Your Goose Is Boiled.
I Bet They'll Send Theo To A Juvenile Delinquent Farm.
He's Probably Going To Have To Break Rocks With A Hammer.
I'm Out Of Here.
Rudy, We Can Go To School Now
Or Stay And Find Out What They're Arguing About.
Let's Stay Here.
I'm With You.
( Footsteps )
Here Comes Dad.
Act Cool, Okay?
Hey.
Hey, Dad. Hey, Dad.
Dad, You Look Tired.
Yeah, I Am.
You Up Late?
Yeah.
Baby?
No.
Reading?
No.
Arguing?
Rudy!
We Couldn't Find Out Anything
With Your Questions.
Dad, If You Don't Want To Talk About It, It's Okay.
Mom And I Were Arguing
But We're In Love, And That Happens Sometimes.
When Will It Be Over?
Oh, Soon, I'm Sure.
Maybe You Should Give Mom Some Flowers.
You Should Buy Her A Dog.
What Kind Of Dog Do You Think Your Mother Should Get?
A Cocker Spaniel With A Red Collar.
Isn't There A School Bus Waiting For You Guys?
Yeah, Dad.
Rudy, I'll Walk You.
Remember, Dad
You're Just A Dog Away From This Being Over.
I Understand That
And I Want To Thank You For Your Suggestions
Because They Were Both Enlightening And Delightening.
Morning, Hon.
Good Morning.
Are We Still Arguing?
I Don't Know.
Are We?
Doesn't Look Like It.
Cliff, We Were Really Angry With Theo
And We Got Upset With Each Other
And Tried To Force Each Other To Apologize.
I Know.
We Were Silly.
I Have A Way To End This Argument
And No One Has To Say, "I'm Sorry."
We're Going To Write On These Pads.
We'll Write Down The Things That The Other Did That Made Us Upset
And We'll Exchange Lists
And Then We'll Promise Never To Do Those Things Again.
Okay, You Write First.
Let's Go Together.
Together?
All Right, Here We Are Writing.
I'm Finished.
Uh-Huh.
You're Still Writing.
I'm Not Finished Yet.
I Thought You Were Finished.
I Know, But I Just Thought Of Some Other Things.
You're Writing Out Of Spite.
No, I'm Not, Dear.
Yes, You Are.
Give Me This Pad.
"I Didn't Like It When Clair Did...
And Then She Said..."
Cliff, You Haven't Completed A Sentence.
You Fill In The Blanks.
You Know What You Did Wrong.
You See #5 On My List?
"Pigheaded"-- That's You.
Okay, I'll Show You #9 On My List.
You Know What #9 Is?
"Gives Us Dumb Things To Do."
No, Cliff.
Yes.
The Problem
Is You Don't Like Newness And Innovation
And You Can't Take Me Being Honest With You.
Until You Can, This Argument Is Still On.
Good Day.
Good Day?
It's Morning.
That's How Much You Know.
It's Not "Good Day," It's "Good Morning."
So, Make That #10:
"Doesn't Know What Time Of Day It Is."
Mr. Hanson, I Agree.
An Out-Of-Court Settlement Would Be Best.
But Frankly, I Find Your Client's Offer Unacceptable.
We Think $75,000 Is Fair.
$75,000 Will Hardly Compensate
For The Loss Of Income Due To Your Client's Delay In Shipping.
We're Being Overly Generous By Offering Anything At All.
( Beep )
Mary, I'm In Conference.
Oh, Yes?
Yes, Of Course, I'll Take The Call.
Please Put It Through.
Excuse Me.
Hello, Sweetness.
My Secretary Said That This Is Important.
Have You Got A Minute?
Yes.
( Sentimental Jazz Music )
You Recognize That?
Yes, I Recall That.
Remember When We First Danced To It?
Yes, I Recall That, Also.
Listen, I Don't Like It When We Argue.
I Concur.
Can We Make Up?
Perhaps.
I Love You.
I Know.
Do You Love Me?
Yes.
Let Me Hear You Say It.
I...
I Will Have To Defer
On That Request.
Why?
I'm In A Conference, Doctor.
Say It In Spanish.
Hay Un Otro Abogado Aqui
Y Ahora Estamos Hablando
A Cosas Muy Importantes.
I Like It, But I Don't Think You Said, "I Love You."
Correctomente, Senor Doctor.
Okay, You Don't Have To Say It
But I Do Want You To Dance With Me.
I Can't Do That.
Are You At Your Desk?
Well, Yes, I Am.
And I'm Sitting At My Desk
So I Want The Two Of Us To Desk Dance.
I Beg Your Pardon?
Come On, Clair, You Can Do It.
No.
Don't Let Me Dance By Myself.
All Right.
Okay.
Woo-Ooo.
I Really Must Be Going Now.
I'll See You At Home?
Yes.
Bye.
It's Been Lovely
Talking To You.
I Really Am Sorry.
That Was A Call From My Most Important Client.
Yes, I Always Take Calls From My Wife, Too.
( Sultry Music )
Oh, Hi.
Oh, Boy.
Looks Like You Two Aren't Arguing Anymore.
That's Right, And Now We Can Concentrate
On Your Punishment.
Why Don't You Go Up To Your Room
And We'll Be Up Shortly.
You Will Remember To Give It To Me, Won't You?
Oh, Don't Worry.
We'll See You Later.
What I Feel Is
That He Understands Exactly What He's Done Wrong.
It's All Right To Let Him Go To Lana's Party Saturday.
Okay.
All Right?
We Can Ground Him For A Week After That.
Mm-Hmm.
You Know, There's Still Something
We Have To Say To Each Other.
I Know.
I'll Go First.
No, No.
On The Count Of Three
We'll Say It To Each Other Together.
One...
Uh-Huh.
Two...
( Smack )
Three.
I Want To Get Some Dinner. I'm Sorry.