1 00:01:11,931 --> 00:01:13,831 Hi, Cliff. 2 00:01:13,831 --> 00:01:15,764 That Banner Looks Great. 3 00:01:15,764 --> 00:01:18,298 Sondra And Elvin Will Love That. 4 00:01:18,298 --> 00:01:20,531 They're On Their Way From The Airport. 5 00:01:20,531 --> 00:01:23,231 I Got Sondra An Incredible Gift. 6 00:01:23,231 --> 00:01:24,631 The Briefcase. 7 00:01:24,631 --> 00:01:27,131 Not Just Any Briefcase. 8 00:01:27,131 --> 00:01:30,498 This Is Patent Leather, With Her Initials In Gold. 9 00:01:30,498 --> 00:01:32,398 It's Perfect For Law School. 10 00:01:32,398 --> 00:01:36,264 When They See What I Got Elvin For Med. School 11 00:01:36,264 --> 00:01:38,731 They Will Be Very Impressed. 12 00:01:38,731 --> 00:01:39,531 What? 13 00:01:39,531 --> 00:01:40,731 I'm Not Telling. 14 00:01:40,731 --> 00:01:42,164 Not Even A Hint? 15 00:01:42,164 --> 00:01:43,464 Okay. 16 00:01:43,464 --> 00:01:48,698 It's Shiny And Cold And Rhymes With "Ethoscope." 17 00:01:48,698 --> 00:01:51,598 You Got Him A Stethoscope. 18 00:01:51,598 --> 00:01:53,564 How Did You Guess? 19 00:01:53,564 --> 00:01:56,198 This Is State-Of-The-Art. 20 00:01:56,198 --> 00:01:58,631 You Put This In Your Ears 21 00:01:58,631 --> 00:02:01,898 Your Patient Does Not Have To Leave Home. 22 00:02:01,898 --> 00:02:03,398 He'll Love It. 23 00:02:03,398 --> 00:02:04,631 Yes, He Will. 24 00:02:04,631 --> 00:02:07,564 I'm So Excited For Sondra And Elvin. 25 00:02:07,564 --> 00:02:08,864 They're Newlyweds... 26 00:02:08,864 --> 00:02:12,064 They Are Both Going To Good Graduate Schools... 27 00:02:12,064 --> 00:02:15,164 It's The Most Exciting Time Of Their Lives. 28 00:02:15,164 --> 00:02:17,631 And Do You Know Why? 29 00:02:17,631 --> 00:02:20,264 Because They Have No Children. 30 00:02:20,264 --> 00:02:24,498 Yes, But One Day They Might Get Lucky Like Us. 31 00:02:24,498 --> 00:02:29,398 Our Daughter And Son-In-Law Are Following In Our Footsteps. 32 00:02:29,398 --> 00:02:31,631 You Know What I Love? 33 00:02:31,631 --> 00:02:35,164 The Very Fact That Our Four Remaining Children 34 00:02:35,164 --> 00:02:38,631 Might Go To Law School And Marry Doctors 35 00:02:38,631 --> 00:02:41,764 And Then If Each One Had Five Children 36 00:02:41,764 --> 00:02:45,198 And They Went To Law School And Married Doctors 37 00:02:45,198 --> 00:02:50,531 Then I Could Open Up A Clinic And Not Worry About Being Sued. 38 00:02:50,531 --> 00:02:51,364 Hello. 39 00:02:51,364 --> 00:02:53,231 Mom, Dad, We're Home! 40 00:02:53,231 --> 00:02:54,631 Welcome Home! 41 00:02:54,631 --> 00:02:56,098 Sondra: Thanks. 42 00:02:56,098 --> 00:02:57,598 Hey... 43 00:02:57,598 --> 00:03:00,831 How Does It Feel Being Married Eight Days? 44 00:03:00,831 --> 00:03:01,631 Great. 45 00:03:01,631 --> 00:03:02,664 How Was The Honeymoon? 46 00:03:02,664 --> 00:03:04,164 Unbelievable. 47 00:03:04,164 --> 00:03:05,298 Sensational. 48 00:03:05,298 --> 00:03:07,064 Better Than I Imagined. 49 00:03:07,064 --> 00:03:09,398 Elvin, Not In Front Of The Children. 50 00:03:09,398 --> 00:03:10,698 I'm Sorry. 51 00:03:10,698 --> 00:03:11,731 Did You Fight? 52 00:03:11,731 --> 00:03:12,931 No. 53 00:03:12,931 --> 00:03:14,164 We Fought Once. 54 00:03:14,164 --> 00:03:17,131 We Fought Over Who Loved Whom More. 55 00:03:17,131 --> 00:03:19,364 And Whom Won? 56 00:03:19,364 --> 00:03:22,498 When You Love Each Other As We Do 57 00:03:22,498 --> 00:03:24,764 It's Hard To Measure, Dr. Huxtable. 58 00:03:24,764 --> 00:03:26,098 Elvin, We're Married. 59 00:03:26,098 --> 00:03:27,431 Call Him "Dad." 60 00:03:27,431 --> 00:03:28,631 May I? 61 00:03:28,631 --> 00:03:29,864 No. 62 00:03:30,898 --> 00:03:32,364 I'm Just Joking. 63 00:03:32,364 --> 00:03:34,531 Welcome To The Family, Son. 64 00:03:34,531 --> 00:03:37,198 He Called Me "Son." 65 00:03:37,198 --> 00:03:38,364 Sondra, Look. 66 00:03:39,398 --> 00:03:40,698 What's All This? 67 00:03:40,698 --> 00:03:42,298 We're Welcoming You Home 68 00:03:42,298 --> 00:03:45,264 And Giving You A Send-Off To Graduate School. 69 00:03:45,264 --> 00:03:47,298 And So, Without Further Ado 70 00:03:47,298 --> 00:03:52,031 I Have A Good-Luck Gift For Our Future Professionals. 71 00:03:52,031 --> 00:03:54,464 You Shouldn't Have Done This, Dad. 72 00:03:54,464 --> 00:03:55,598 Don't Be Silly. 73 00:03:55,598 --> 00:03:56,598 I Wanted To. 74 00:03:56,598 --> 00:03:58,198 Is It A Tie? 75 00:03:58,198 --> 00:04:00,631 No, Rudy, The Box Is Too Big. 76 00:04:00,631 --> 00:04:02,064 It's Probably A Stethoscope. 77 00:04:04,798 --> 00:04:06,298 I Knew It. 78 00:04:06,298 --> 00:04:07,464 It's Beautiful 79 00:04:07,464 --> 00:04:09,631 But I Really Can't Accept This. 80 00:04:09,631 --> 00:04:11,464 But You Have To. 81 00:04:11,464 --> 00:04:12,664 Look At This. 82 00:04:12,664 --> 00:04:14,198 Put Them In There. 83 00:04:14,198 --> 00:04:15,264 Listen To This. 84 00:04:15,264 --> 00:04:16,298 Ba-Boom, Ba-Boom 85 00:04:16,298 --> 00:04:17,498 Ba-Boom! 86 00:04:17,498 --> 00:04:19,498 The Reason I Can't... 87 00:04:19,498 --> 00:04:21,131 I Know It's Expensive 88 00:04:21,131 --> 00:04:24,764 But Look At It As An Investment In The Future. 89 00:04:24,764 --> 00:04:28,231 There Won't Be Any Stethoscope In My Future. 90 00:04:28,231 --> 00:04:33,564 I Am Not Buying An X-Ray Machine To Hang Around Your Neck. 91 00:04:33,564 --> 00:04:36,064 The Reason Is I'm Not Going To Medical School. 92 00:04:36,064 --> 00:04:37,531 Huh? 93 00:04:37,531 --> 00:04:39,698 I Don't Want To Be A Doctor. 94 00:04:39,698 --> 00:04:41,198 I Don't Understand. 95 00:04:41,198 --> 00:04:44,898 You Should Have Given Him A Tie. 96 00:04:44,898 --> 00:04:46,964 Elvin, Tell Them Why. 97 00:04:46,964 --> 00:04:48,064 They'll Understand. 98 00:04:48,064 --> 00:04:49,731 I've Always Had Doubts 99 00:04:49,731 --> 00:04:52,264 About Going Into Medicine. 100 00:04:52,264 --> 00:04:53,898 I Have A Problem 101 00:04:53,898 --> 00:04:56,364 With Charging Sick People Money. 102 00:05:00,931 --> 00:05:05,098 You Can Do Community Service Where You Don't Charge Patients. 103 00:05:05,098 --> 00:05:06,698 There You Go. 104 00:05:06,698 --> 00:05:08,164 I'm Also Not Sure 105 00:05:08,164 --> 00:05:11,164 I Want To Spend Eight Years In Training. 106 00:05:11,164 --> 00:05:13,931 Once You Get Out, It's Fat City. 107 00:05:13,931 --> 00:05:15,198 Right, Dad? 108 00:05:16,398 --> 00:05:19,131 Theo, Elvin Isn't Interested In Big Money. 109 00:05:19,131 --> 00:05:22,864 He Wants To Do Something That Will Make Him Happy. 110 00:05:22,864 --> 00:05:24,231 What Would That Be? 111 00:05:24,231 --> 00:05:28,398 I'd Like To Open My Own Wilderness Store. 112 00:05:36,464 --> 00:05:38,464 Wilderness Store? 113 00:05:38,464 --> 00:05:39,831 Yes, You Know-- 114 00:05:39,831 --> 00:05:42,498 Selling Camping Equipment And Supplies. 115 00:05:42,498 --> 00:05:44,598 You're Interested In Camping? 116 00:05:44,598 --> 00:05:47,231 I Love The Outdoors. 117 00:05:47,231 --> 00:05:48,598 Do You Know Anything About Wilderness Stores? 118 00:05:48,598 --> 00:05:51,664 Not Yet, But We Met This Great Couple... 119 00:05:51,664 --> 00:05:53,198 Wendy And Dave Miller. 120 00:05:53,198 --> 00:05:57,064 They're Opening A Wilderness Store In Brooklyn This Winter. 121 00:05:57,064 --> 00:05:59,264 In... In... Brook... 122 00:06:00,431 --> 00:06:02,898 In Brooklyn? 123 00:06:02,898 --> 00:06:05,398 I'll Train With Them. 124 00:06:05,398 --> 00:06:08,131 Once I Know The Business, I'll Have A Franchise. 125 00:06:08,131 --> 00:06:09,331 Isn't That Exciting? 126 00:06:09,331 --> 00:06:11,364 No, I Think It Stinks. 127 00:06:11,364 --> 00:06:13,431 But, Dad... 128 00:06:13,431 --> 00:06:15,964 I'll Tell You Why It Stinks, Pal... 129 00:06:15,964 --> 00:06:18,031 Cliff, We Need To Talk. 130 00:06:18,031 --> 00:06:21,264 I Want To Tell Him Why It Stinks. 131 00:06:21,264 --> 00:06:23,631 Let's Meet In The Kitchen First. 132 00:06:23,631 --> 00:06:26,764 When We Come Back, Can I Tell Him Why? 133 00:06:26,764 --> 00:06:27,731 Yes. 134 00:06:27,731 --> 00:06:30,231 You Wait Right Here, Mister. 135 00:06:34,431 --> 00:06:36,631 I Hope You're Not Angry, Dad. 136 00:06:36,631 --> 00:06:38,231 Not At All, Sporty. 137 00:06:39,998 --> 00:06:42,664 Just Calm Down. 138 00:06:42,664 --> 00:06:46,164 When I Gave My Daughter To This Man 139 00:06:46,164 --> 00:06:49,764 I Thought He Was Going To Be A Doctor. 140 00:06:49,764 --> 00:06:51,098 Cliff, Stay Calm. 141 00:06:51,098 --> 00:06:53,331 Look At The Inscription On This, Please. 142 00:06:53,331 --> 00:06:58,131 "To Elvin, Straight From My Heart." 143 00:06:58,131 --> 00:07:01,131 Cliff, This Is Really Very Sweet. 144 00:07:01,131 --> 00:07:02,364 That's Right. 145 00:07:02,364 --> 00:07:06,231 And He's Going To Pay Me Back For This. 146 00:07:06,231 --> 00:07:11,098 Mr. Wilderness Will Have To Sell A Lot Of Sleeping Bags 147 00:07:11,098 --> 00:07:13,564 And Campers And Trail Mix 148 00:07:13,564 --> 00:07:17,598 In Order To Give Me The Money Back For This. 149 00:07:17,598 --> 00:07:19,164 Try To Be Rational. 150 00:07:19,164 --> 00:07:22,464 I'll Tell You How Rational I Can Be. 151 00:07:22,464 --> 00:07:26,298 I Hope That He Goes Out Into The Wilderness 152 00:07:26,298 --> 00:07:28,164 And Gets Poison Ivy 153 00:07:28,164 --> 00:07:30,631 And I Have To Treat Him. 154 00:07:30,631 --> 00:07:35,098 Then He Will Find Out How Much Sick People Get Charged. 155 00:07:35,098 --> 00:07:37,464 Cliff, Listen To Me. 156 00:07:37,464 --> 00:07:39,431 This Boy Is Our Son-In-Law. 157 00:07:39,431 --> 00:07:41,664 He Has Married Our Daughter. 158 00:07:41,664 --> 00:07:43,798 Please, Don't Remind Me. 159 00:07:43,798 --> 00:07:47,264 Sondra And Elvin Have To Lead Their Own Lives. 160 00:07:47,264 --> 00:07:50,531 Elvin's Not Interested In Going To Medical School Now 161 00:07:50,531 --> 00:07:52,031 But That Could Change. 162 00:07:52,031 --> 00:07:54,664 Give Him A Year To Try This. 163 00:07:54,664 --> 00:07:57,231 If It Doesn't Work Out 164 00:07:57,231 --> 00:07:59,164 He Could Always Reapply. 165 00:07:59,164 --> 00:08:04,064 He's Going To Pay Me For This Stethoscope. 166 00:08:04,064 --> 00:08:05,264 ( Whispering: ) Theo... 167 00:08:05,264 --> 00:08:06,564 What's Going On? 168 00:08:06,564 --> 00:08:09,298 Let's Get Upstairs While The Getting Is Good. 169 00:08:09,298 --> 00:08:10,398 Why? 170 00:08:10,398 --> 00:08:12,564 They're Only Mad At Elvin. 171 00:08:17,964 --> 00:08:19,498 Hi, Dad. 172 00:08:23,031 --> 00:08:24,631 ( Sigh ) 173 00:08:31,031 --> 00:08:36,864 So You're Going To Open Up This, Uh... Wilderness Store 174 00:08:36,864 --> 00:08:40,498 In Brooklyn Some Time In The Winter. 175 00:08:40,498 --> 00:08:42,431 Do You Have A Job 176 00:08:42,431 --> 00:08:45,198 Between Now And Then? 177 00:08:45,198 --> 00:08:48,964 Yes, And I'm Proud To Say It's In The Medical Profession. 178 00:08:48,964 --> 00:08:50,698 Really? Really? 179 00:08:50,698 --> 00:08:52,731 I'll Be In Pharmaceuticals-- 180 00:08:52,731 --> 00:08:54,731 Bennex Industries. 181 00:08:54,731 --> 00:08:55,698 That's A Big Company. 182 00:08:55,698 --> 00:08:58,431 What Are You Doing For Them? 183 00:08:58,431 --> 00:09:01,298 It's An Entry-Level Job. 184 00:09:01,298 --> 00:09:02,398 Entry Level? 185 00:09:02,398 --> 00:09:03,831 When The Pill Bottles 186 00:09:03,831 --> 00:09:06,864 Come To The End Of The Assembly Line 187 00:09:06,864 --> 00:09:10,331 I Make Sure The Safety Seals Are On The Caps. 188 00:09:11,964 --> 00:09:13,898 I'm Inspector #36. 189 00:09:13,898 --> 00:09:16,164 He's Got A Title, Honey. 190 00:09:16,164 --> 00:09:17,731 He's Inspector #36. 191 00:09:17,731 --> 00:09:21,431 That Sounds Like A Great Job To Me. 192 00:09:21,431 --> 00:09:22,398 It Really Is. 193 00:09:22,398 --> 00:09:24,864 So They'll Have Money 194 00:09:24,864 --> 00:09:26,998 While Sondra Goes To Law School. 195 00:09:26,998 --> 00:09:27,764 Mom? 196 00:09:27,764 --> 00:09:28,731 Yes. 197 00:09:28,731 --> 00:09:31,698 I'm Not Going To Law School. 198 00:09:33,998 --> 00:09:35,131 What? 199 00:09:35,131 --> 00:09:38,331 I've Decided Not To Go To Law School. 200 00:09:38,331 --> 00:09:41,998 You "Decided" Not To Go To Law School?! 201 00:09:41,998 --> 00:09:43,664 This Is Our Dream. 202 00:09:43,664 --> 00:09:47,231 I'll Get A Temporary Job Until The Wilderness Store Opens. 203 00:09:47,231 --> 00:09:49,431 Then I'll Work With My Husband. 204 00:09:49,431 --> 00:09:52,031 Sondra, What Are You Saying? 205 00:09:52,031 --> 00:09:55,598 You Have Always Wanted To Go To Law School. 206 00:09:55,598 --> 00:09:56,931 I Changed My Mind. 207 00:09:56,931 --> 00:09:58,264 Change It Back! 208 00:10:01,198 --> 00:10:05,131 After All The Money We Spent Sending You To Princeton? 209 00:10:05,131 --> 00:10:08,964 Sondra, You Owe Us $79,648.22 210 00:10:08,964 --> 00:10:12,064 And I Want My Money Now. 211 00:10:16,031 --> 00:10:20,598 I'm Not Going Anywhere Till I Get My Money. 212 00:10:20,598 --> 00:10:22,898 I'll Take Whatever She's Got. 213 00:10:22,898 --> 00:10:24,231 Empty Her Pockets. 214 00:10:24,231 --> 00:10:26,264 I'm Not Having This! 215 00:10:26,264 --> 00:10:28,531 No! 216 00:10:28,531 --> 00:10:31,298 Really, Both Of Us Have To Be Calm. 217 00:10:31,298 --> 00:10:34,464 If Elvin Thinks He Can Drag My Baby Off 218 00:10:34,464 --> 00:10:36,864 Into Some Harebrained Business Scheme 219 00:10:36,864 --> 00:10:38,964 And Ruin What Is Potentially 220 00:10:38,964 --> 00:10:41,798 The Greatest Legal Mind Of This Century 221 00:10:41,798 --> 00:10:44,698 He's Going To Have Me To Deal With 222 00:10:44,698 --> 00:10:48,131 And Then He Can Come To You For Treatment. 223 00:10:48,131 --> 00:10:52,631 I Understand, And I Agree With What You're Saying 224 00:10:52,631 --> 00:10:55,464 But You Just Said To Me 225 00:10:55,464 --> 00:10:58,698 "Why Don't We Give Them A Year 226 00:10:58,698 --> 00:11:02,164 And If It Doesn't Work, They Can Reapply." 227 00:11:06,264 --> 00:11:08,664 That Is Just Plain Dumb. 228 00:11:08,664 --> 00:11:13,998 Why Do You Get To Rant And Rave, And I Have To Be Calm? 229 00:11:13,998 --> 00:11:16,264 That Is My Baby In There. 230 00:11:16,264 --> 00:11:18,298 That's My Baby, Too. 231 00:11:18,298 --> 00:11:19,431 You Don't Understand. 232 00:11:19,431 --> 00:11:21,598 You Did Not Have That Child. 233 00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:23,031 I Was The One 234 00:11:23,031 --> 00:11:26,031 Who Was On That Table Screaming, "Take It Out." 235 00:11:26,031 --> 00:11:29,664 If It Takes The Last Breath In My Body 236 00:11:29,664 --> 00:11:33,064 Sondra Is Going To Become A Lawyer. 237 00:11:33,064 --> 00:11:33,931 Okay, What Now? 238 00:11:33,931 --> 00:11:35,931 It's Very Simple. 239 00:11:35,931 --> 00:11:36,898 She'll Divorce Him. 240 00:11:36,898 --> 00:11:41,764 Sondra Is In Love With The Boy. 241 00:11:41,764 --> 00:11:43,331 Then You Take Elvin. 242 00:11:43,331 --> 00:11:45,998 What Will I Do With Him? 243 00:11:45,998 --> 00:11:48,931 Take Him On A Trip In The Country 244 00:11:48,931 --> 00:11:50,664 And Drop Him Off. 245 00:11:50,664 --> 00:11:54,331 He Will Love It In The Wilderness. 246 00:11:54,331 --> 00:11:56,098 Take Him Out There. 247 00:12:03,831 --> 00:12:05,598 Know What I Love Most About This Apartment? 248 00:12:05,598 --> 00:12:06,598 What? 249 00:12:06,598 --> 00:12:08,364 That You're In It. 250 00:12:08,364 --> 00:12:10,531 Aw, Elvin. 251 00:12:11,764 --> 00:12:12,931 ( Buzz ) 252 00:12:12,931 --> 00:12:14,398 I Can't Believe It. 253 00:12:14,398 --> 00:12:15,398 They're Here. 254 00:12:15,398 --> 00:12:17,064 Our First Dinner Guests. 255 00:12:19,098 --> 00:12:20,298 Hi. 256 00:12:20,298 --> 00:12:22,264 Mom, Dad, Come In. 257 00:12:24,998 --> 00:12:26,231 What Do You Think? 258 00:12:26,231 --> 00:12:28,331 So This Is It. 259 00:12:28,331 --> 00:12:29,298 Dad? 260 00:12:29,298 --> 00:12:31,898 It's An Apartment, All Right. 261 00:12:31,898 --> 00:12:33,231 Have A Seat. 262 00:12:33,231 --> 00:12:34,131 Make Yourselves At Home. 263 00:12:34,131 --> 00:12:35,298 Thank You. 264 00:12:35,298 --> 00:12:37,298 Thank You Very Much. 265 00:12:48,631 --> 00:12:49,864 Comfortable, Isn't It? 266 00:12:49,864 --> 00:12:50,864 Yes. 267 00:12:50,864 --> 00:12:52,998 Can You Believe It? 268 00:12:52,998 --> 00:12:55,098 We Found It On The Street. 269 00:12:55,098 --> 00:12:57,831 Somebody Actually Threw It Away. 270 00:12:57,831 --> 00:12:59,831 What, The Apartment? 271 00:13:01,131 --> 00:13:04,831 Let Me Show You What We've Done To The Place. 272 00:13:04,831 --> 00:13:06,964 You Should Have Seen It 273 00:13:06,964 --> 00:13:08,764 Before We Moved In. 274 00:13:08,764 --> 00:13:09,998 It Was Awful. 275 00:13:09,998 --> 00:13:11,198 Thank You. 276 00:13:11,198 --> 00:13:14,331 It Was Elvin's Idea To Put Up This Curtain 277 00:13:14,331 --> 00:13:17,498 To Separate The Kitchen From The Dining Room. 278 00:13:17,498 --> 00:13:19,031 That's Nice. 279 00:13:19,031 --> 00:13:22,564 Where's This View Of The Verrazano Bridge? 280 00:13:22,564 --> 00:13:23,631 This Way. 281 00:13:23,631 --> 00:13:24,998 Can I Help? 282 00:13:24,998 --> 00:13:26,231 No, No. 283 00:13:26,231 --> 00:13:29,098 I'll Just Roll Right On Out. 284 00:13:30,431 --> 00:13:35,698 That's The "K" From The Valley Fair Milk Sign. 285 00:13:35,698 --> 00:13:36,664 Ah! 286 00:13:36,664 --> 00:13:38,931 Okay. So This Is It, Huh? 287 00:13:38,931 --> 00:13:40,098 Yeah. 288 00:13:40,098 --> 00:13:41,431 Where's The Bridge? 289 00:13:41,431 --> 00:13:42,698 It's Over There. 290 00:13:42,698 --> 00:13:44,131 To The Left. 291 00:13:44,131 --> 00:13:45,131 Ah! 292 00:13:45,131 --> 00:13:46,831 All I See... 293 00:13:46,831 --> 00:13:49,664 I Just See The Toll Booths. 294 00:13:49,664 --> 00:13:52,898 See How They Sparkle In The Twilight? 295 00:13:52,898 --> 00:13:54,064 Yeah. 296 00:13:54,064 --> 00:13:57,164 You Should Set Chairs On The Windowsill 297 00:13:57,164 --> 00:13:59,131 And Have A Good Time. 298 00:13:59,131 --> 00:14:00,464 ( Loud Siren ) 299 00:14:00,464 --> 00:14:04,031 That's Why We Usually Keep The Window Closed. 300 00:14:04,031 --> 00:14:06,031 There's A Fire Station Next Door. 301 00:14:06,031 --> 00:14:07,364 How Do You Sleep? 302 00:14:07,364 --> 00:14:09,431 There Isn't A Fire Every Night. 303 00:14:09,431 --> 00:14:13,531 Except When We Look Into Each Other's Eyes. 304 00:14:13,531 --> 00:14:14,964 Oh, Elvin. 305 00:14:16,364 --> 00:14:17,731 I Hope You're Hungry. 306 00:14:17,731 --> 00:14:19,231 We're Having Spaghetti. 307 00:14:19,231 --> 00:14:24,598 ( Creaking ) 308 00:14:24,598 --> 00:14:26,298 I Knew I Forgot Something-- 309 00:14:26,298 --> 00:14:27,898 The Basil For The Sauce. 310 00:14:27,898 --> 00:14:31,064 There's A Wonderful Produce Market Up The Street. 311 00:14:31,064 --> 00:14:32,731 Let's Go Get Some. 312 00:14:32,731 --> 00:14:33,731 Great Idea. 313 00:14:33,731 --> 00:14:35,331 Want To Come, Dad? 314 00:14:35,331 --> 00:14:38,798 No, I'll Stay Here And Talk Husband Talk With Elvin. 315 00:14:38,798 --> 00:14:39,898 Love That, Dad. 316 00:14:39,898 --> 00:14:41,164 We'll Be Right Back. 317 00:14:41,164 --> 00:14:42,064 Okay. 318 00:14:42,064 --> 00:14:43,664 What's This? 319 00:14:43,664 --> 00:14:46,331 I Was Going To Explain That At Dinner-- 320 00:14:46,331 --> 00:14:48,431 I Got A Job Waiting Tables. 321 00:14:48,431 --> 00:14:51,631 Didn't You Apply For A U.N. Tour Guide Job? 322 00:14:51,631 --> 00:14:53,764 They Postponed The Interview. 323 00:14:53,764 --> 00:14:55,098 We Couldn't Wait. 324 00:14:55,098 --> 00:14:56,364 We Need Money. 325 00:14:56,364 --> 00:14:59,131 Doesn't Elvin Have Money Coming In? 326 00:14:59,131 --> 00:15:02,331 I Was Going To Explain That At Dinner. 327 00:15:02,331 --> 00:15:04,398 I Lost My Job. 328 00:15:04,398 --> 00:15:07,364 The Company Had An Efficiency Expert Visit. 329 00:15:07,364 --> 00:15:10,731 They Decided They Only Needed 35 Inspectors. 330 00:15:10,731 --> 00:15:14,331 Don't Worry, Mom And Dad. 331 00:15:14,331 --> 00:15:16,331 Sondra Spoke To Her Managers. 332 00:15:16,331 --> 00:15:18,064 A Busboy Might Be Leaving 333 00:15:18,064 --> 00:15:20,731 And They'd Be Glad To Give Me A Chance. 334 00:15:20,731 --> 00:15:23,898 Let's Go For The Basil. 335 00:15:33,531 --> 00:15:36,464 These Are Your Degrees From Princeton. 336 00:15:36,464 --> 00:15:37,064 Yeah. 337 00:15:37,064 --> 00:15:37,764 Fell Down. 338 00:15:37,764 --> 00:15:38,464 Yeah. 339 00:15:38,464 --> 00:15:39,798 Rather Symbolic 340 00:15:39,798 --> 00:15:40,831 Don't You Think? 341 00:15:43,031 --> 00:15:44,364 Elvin. 342 00:15:44,364 --> 00:15:45,698 Yes, Dad. 343 00:15:47,031 --> 00:15:48,698 Uh... 344 00:15:50,031 --> 00:15:52,764 How Long Are You Going... 345 00:16:06,764 --> 00:16:08,431 How Long... 346 00:16:08,431 --> 00:16:13,264 How Long Are You Going To Keep My Daughter Living Like This? 347 00:16:13,264 --> 00:16:16,098 We Have A Plan. 348 00:16:16,098 --> 00:16:19,098 We'll Get The Wilderness Store Started. 349 00:16:19,098 --> 00:16:21,264 Then We'll Get A Bigger Place. 350 00:16:21,264 --> 00:16:23,364 You Have A Plan, But No Job. 351 00:16:23,364 --> 00:16:25,764 I Understand Your Concern. 352 00:16:25,764 --> 00:16:29,498 But Do You Know The Story Of Milton Hershey? 353 00:16:29,498 --> 00:16:32,398 No, I'm Sorry, I Don't. 354 00:16:32,398 --> 00:16:34,698 Milton Hershey Went Bankrupt Six Times 355 00:16:34,698 --> 00:16:37,131 Before He Hit It Big In Chocolate. 356 00:16:37,131 --> 00:16:40,698 You're Not Planning On Taking My Daughter Through Bankruptcy 357 00:16:40,698 --> 00:16:41,964 Six Times? 358 00:16:41,964 --> 00:16:45,431 Dad, I Think I Understand How You're Feeling. 359 00:16:45,431 --> 00:16:48,031 No, I Don't Think You Can 360 00:16:48,031 --> 00:16:51,164 Because That's My Daughter. 361 00:16:51,164 --> 00:16:52,131 Right. 362 00:16:52,131 --> 00:16:53,331 But Remember 363 00:16:53,331 --> 00:16:55,564 That Your Daughter Is Also My Wife. 364 00:16:55,564 --> 00:16:58,898 She Was My Daughter First. 365 00:16:58,898 --> 00:17:01,898 But She's My Wife Now. 366 00:17:04,498 --> 00:17:09,364 And She Will Always Be My Daughter. 367 00:17:09,364 --> 00:17:11,464 But She Wears My Ring. 368 00:17:11,464 --> 00:17:12,764 She Wears Braces 369 00:17:12,764 --> 00:17:16,131 That I Paid For To Straighten Her Teeth 370 00:17:16,131 --> 00:17:18,464 So She Could Marry A Man 371 00:17:18,464 --> 00:17:22,864 Who's Going To Take Her Into Bankruptcy Six Times. 372 00:17:22,864 --> 00:17:25,798 We Could Go On Like This Forever. 373 00:17:25,798 --> 00:17:27,331 I Guess You're Right. 374 00:17:27,331 --> 00:17:29,331 I Don't Mean To Interfere 375 00:17:29,331 --> 00:17:32,998 But I Do Think, If It's All Right With You 376 00:17:32,998 --> 00:17:35,964 I'd Like To Help Out With Some Money. 377 00:17:35,964 --> 00:17:36,564 Money. 378 00:17:36,564 --> 00:17:38,831 Money. 379 00:17:38,831 --> 00:17:39,964 No, Thank You. 380 00:17:39,964 --> 00:17:42,864 We're Determined To Make It On Our Own. 381 00:17:42,864 --> 00:17:44,031 It's A Loan. 382 00:17:44,031 --> 00:17:44,964 No. 383 00:17:44,964 --> 00:17:47,098 Milton Hershey Would Take It. 384 00:17:56,731 --> 00:17:58,731 Tonight Was Fun. 385 00:17:58,731 --> 00:18:00,131 ( Laughing ) 386 00:18:00,131 --> 00:18:01,798 Huh? Yeah. 387 00:18:01,798 --> 00:18:04,798 After We'd Been There For A While 388 00:18:04,798 --> 00:18:06,764 I Got A Warm Feeling. 389 00:18:06,764 --> 00:18:09,664 I Think It Was The Heat From The Hot Plate. 390 00:18:09,664 --> 00:18:10,898 ( Knocking ) 391 00:18:10,898 --> 00:18:11,998 Who Is It? 392 00:18:11,998 --> 00:18:14,298 Theo. I Need To Talk To You. 393 00:18:14,298 --> 00:18:15,631 Come In, Honey. 394 00:18:15,631 --> 00:18:16,631 Hi. 395 00:18:16,631 --> 00:18:17,631 Hey. 396 00:18:17,631 --> 00:18:18,964 I'm Really Sorry 397 00:18:18,964 --> 00:18:21,231 About What Sondra And Elvin Did To You. 398 00:18:21,231 --> 00:18:23,398 Well, It's Okay. 399 00:18:23,398 --> 00:18:24,731 No, I Mean It. 400 00:18:24,731 --> 00:18:28,231 If Sondra Had Come To You As A High School Senior 401 00:18:28,231 --> 00:18:31,298 And Said, "I Want To Open A Camping Store" 402 00:18:31,298 --> 00:18:33,564 You Would Have Been Prepared. 403 00:18:33,564 --> 00:18:38,231 But To Do It After Four Years Of College Was Really Unfair. 404 00:18:38,231 --> 00:18:40,498 I'd Never Do That To You. 405 00:18:40,498 --> 00:18:42,298 Thank You, Theo. 406 00:18:42,298 --> 00:18:44,898 That's Why I'm Telling You Now 407 00:18:44,898 --> 00:18:47,064 I'm Not Going To College. 408 00:18:48,431 --> 00:18:51,398 I'm Opening My Own Business Right After High School. 409 00:18:51,398 --> 00:18:52,964 With What Money? 410 00:18:52,964 --> 00:18:54,564 That's Why I'm Here. 411 00:18:54,564 --> 00:18:56,564 All You Have To Do 412 00:18:56,564 --> 00:19:01,631 Is Give Me The Money You'll Spend On My Education Now. 413 00:19:01,631 --> 00:19:03,931 How Much Are We Talking? 414 00:19:03,931 --> 00:19:06,298 I Brought My Calculator And This Research 415 00:19:06,298 --> 00:19:08,564 So We Could Figure It Out. 416 00:19:08,564 --> 00:19:10,364 To Go To Bennington... 417 00:19:10,364 --> 00:19:16,198 That's The Most Expensive School In The United States Right Now. 418 00:19:16,198 --> 00:19:19,198 You Would Have Wanted Me To Attend The Best. 419 00:19:19,198 --> 00:19:20,164 Of Course. 420 00:19:20,164 --> 00:19:21,631 Yes. Good. 421 00:19:21,631 --> 00:19:27,231 Tuition Plus Room And Board Will Cost $17,999. 422 00:19:27,231 --> 00:19:29,898 Multiply That By Four Years 423 00:19:29,898 --> 00:19:35,231 And Add A 5% Increase Each Year For Inflation 424 00:19:35,231 --> 00:19:40,264 Then Add $7,000 For Books And Lab Fees. 425 00:19:40,264 --> 00:19:41,431 Lab Fees?! 426 00:19:41,431 --> 00:19:43,431 I Was Going To Major 427 00:19:43,431 --> 00:19:44,964 In Chemistry. 428 00:19:47,098 --> 00:19:49,531 We Would Have Been Proud. 429 00:19:51,064 --> 00:19:52,564 Thanks. 430 00:19:52,564 --> 00:19:54,898 Now, Bennington College Is In Vermont 431 00:19:54,898 --> 00:19:58,064 So We'll Figure In The Cost Of Coming Home 432 00:19:58,064 --> 00:19:59,398 Every Weekend. 433 00:19:59,398 --> 00:20:02,598 He Would Come Home Every Weekend. 434 00:20:03,631 --> 00:20:05,564 He's A Good Boy. 435 00:20:05,564 --> 00:20:08,564 That Comes To $8,000. 436 00:20:08,564 --> 00:20:10,831 Plus $3,000 For Incidentals. 437 00:20:10,831 --> 00:20:13,764 Don't Forget Askadentals. 438 00:20:13,764 --> 00:20:15,098 What's An Askadental? 439 00:20:15,098 --> 00:20:17,898 An Askadental Is The Money You Ask For 440 00:20:17,898 --> 00:20:22,364 When You Misspend The Incidental Money You Ask For. 441 00:20:22,364 --> 00:20:24,564 All Right, I Like That! 442 00:20:24,564 --> 00:20:29,498 So We'll Add Another $5,000 For Askadentals. 443 00:20:29,498 --> 00:20:34,164 The Grand Total Is $112,500. 444 00:20:34,164 --> 00:20:35,498 Mm-Hmm. 445 00:20:35,498 --> 00:20:36,764 That's Pretty Steep. 446 00:20:36,764 --> 00:20:38,131 Yes, It Is. 447 00:20:38,131 --> 00:20:39,998 I'm Willing To Deal Here. 448 00:20:39,998 --> 00:20:44,064 Because You're Great Parents, I'll Take Off 18%. 449 00:20:44,064 --> 00:20:45,631 Sounds Good. 450 00:20:45,631 --> 00:20:47,064 Absolutely. 451 00:20:47,064 --> 00:20:48,498 It Does? 452 00:20:48,498 --> 00:20:49,731 Sure. 453 00:20:49,731 --> 00:20:52,164 Just Take The College Boards 454 00:20:52,164 --> 00:20:56,231 And Get Accepted To Bennington As A Chemistry Major. 455 00:20:56,231 --> 00:20:59,164 If I Don't Get Accepted At Bennington 456 00:20:59,164 --> 00:21:01,698 I'll Take 50 Cents On The Dollar. 457 00:21:01,698 --> 00:21:04,864 Theo, I'm Going To Tell You What... 458 00:21:04,864 --> 00:21:06,231 If I Were You 459 00:21:06,231 --> 00:21:10,164 I Would Leave This Room While I Was Ahead And Alive. 460 00:21:14,564 --> 00:21:18,031 Can I At Least Borrow $3.00 461 00:21:18,031 --> 00:21:20,031 For Some Pizza?