No Matter How Long You Stare At Them
They Won't Go Away.
Rudy!
I Hate Brussels Sprouts.
You Haven't Even Tasted Them.
I Don't Like How They Look.
Are You Going Dancing With Me Tonight?
Yes.
Dressed Like That?
Are You Going Dressed Like That?
Hey, I'm Almost Dressed.
All I Need Is A Shirt And Tie.
You're The One Who Needs Urban Renewal.
Don't Worry, I'll Be Ready.
Look, Ralph And Marie Are Coming Here Tonight.
I Will Be Ready.
Okay, Because Tonight I'm Going Dancing With My Wife.
You Really Think You're Smooth, Don't You?
Hey, I Was Born Way Before Whipped Cream.
They Invented The Spotlight For Me.
Cliff, I Don't Mean To Hurt Your Feelings
But, Honey, You Cannot Dance.
Cliff, This Is You, Okay?
This Is NotMy Idea Of Great Dancing.
That's How I Look?
Exactly.
Well, Why Is It That People Stop, Stand Back And Watch?
Because You Are Also Doing This.
But I Am A Good Dancer.
Dancing With You Is Like A Professional Wrestling Match.
It Is Grab, Snatch, Jerk, Fling And Fly Across The Dance Floor.
I Better Get Dressed.
Don't Let Rudy Leave Until She's Cleaned Her Plate.
I'm Not Eating Them.
All Right. Then Just Sit Here.
For How Long?
Until You Eat Them.
All I Can Say Is
I Remember A Little Girl Who Wouldn't Eat Her Vegetables.
So Her Parents Said:
"You're Going To Sit There Until You Eat Them."
And She Saw Her Friends Growing Up.
People Were Going To College.
She Was Still Sitting There--
In The Same Clothes She Had On When She Was Five Years Old.
Now Are You Going To Eat Them?
All Right, Then Just Sit There.
And Don't Try To Hide Them
Because If You Try To Hide Them, I'm Coming Back To...
Check My Teeth.
Right.
Theo, Can I Please Borrow $15?
From Whom?
You.
I Work For My Money.
You Get An Allowance.
Getting An Allowance From Dad Is Hard Work.
I'm Desperate.
I Want Tickets To The "Walking Lemons" Concert.
They're Sold Out.
They Added Another Performance.
I'm Getting In Line Tonight To Buy Tickets Tomorrow Morning.
Mom And Dad Will Not Let You
Sleep Outside On The Sidewalk Overnight.
Well, I'll Get Them Together, Present My Case
And When Dad Says No, I'll Mention The Time
He Slept Outside Yankee Stadium For World Series Tickets.
It Was Connie Mack Stadium In Philadelphia.
Please Lend Me $15?
Hey, If Dad Says Yes, I'll Give You $500.
You Don't Have $500.
Do I Look Worried?
Dad Will Say Yes.
He'll Go For It, You'll See.
Hi, Dad.
Hey, Denise.
Gosh, You Look Great.
Well, Thank You.
In Fact, You've Never Looked Better.
What Do You Want?
I'll Wait For Mom.
It's That Big, Huh?
It's Not That Big.
It's Easier To Ask You Two Together.
And You're Expecting Me To Say No.
That's Not True.
Come Here, Denise.
Yes, You.
(Ring)
Stay Right There.
Huxtable Residence, This Is Dr. Huxtable.
Hi, Mrs. Davis...
Really?
You Don't Feel Well.
No, It's All Right. I Can Get Another Baby Sitter.
Don't Worry, You Get Yourself Down And Drink Fluids
Because This Thing Is Going Around.
I'll Get Another Baby Sitter. Bye-Bye.
Don't Look At Me.
Okay.
Daddy...
Daddy, I Have Plans.
I Can't Baby-Sit Tonight.
Well...
Your Mother And I Have Plans.
It's Either You Or Us, And I Know It Isn't Us.
How About Theo?
Do You Think Theo Could Do This?
He'd Be Terrific.
You Lie.
I Think He Would Be Really Good.
Will You Take The Responsibility?
Yeah.
Okay, What Can I Lose-- A House, A Couple Of Kids?
(Knocking)
Come In.
Hey, Dad.
Hi, Son.
I Don't Know What It Is, Dad.
But I Can't Throw It Away Until I Find Out.
What Did I Do?
Mrs. Davis.
Mrs. Davis?
Yes.
Mrs. Davis Cannot Baby-Sit Tonight.
Your Sister Has Plans, So You're Next In Line.
Yes, Congratulations.
Dad, I Can't.
Why?
It's A Girl's Job.
A Girl's Job?
Nobody Ever Asked Denise To Shovel The Sidewalk.
Good Point.
I'm Off The Hook?
No, But The Next Snowstorm, Denise Is Shoveling.
Dad, I Really Think You're Making A Big Mistake.
I'm Irresponsible.
It Takes A Big Man To Admit That He Has A Problem.
It Takes A Big Man To Try To Solve That Problem.
And I'm Offering You
That Opportunity.
I Guess I Have To Take It, Don't I?
A Big Man Would
If A Bigger Man Was Standing Next To Him.
Dad, I'll Accept The Challenge.
I'm Proud Of You.
How Much Does It Pay?
Sit Down, Son.
You Know, Son, A Long, Long Time Ago
Three Or Four Generations Ago
Parents Didn't Talk Much To Their Children.
The Father Would Come In, Look At His Son Sleeping
Around 4:00 In The Morning.
He Would Shake The Boy And Say, "Go Out And Plow The Field Now."
The Boy Would Wipe His Eyes And Say, "Yes, Pa."
He Would Go Out And Do It.
And Occasionally
The Boy Said:
"How Much Do I Get Paid?"
And His Pa Would Get The Plow And Run Over His Son.
Those Days Are Gone Now, Son
Because We've Become More Civilized, More Sophisticated.
But Still Inside Of Me, No Matter How Sophisticated I Am
Every Once In A While
When I Tell One Of My Children To Do Something
And They Ask Me How Much They'll Get Paid
That Thing Sort Of Builds Up Again.
When I Tell You To Do Something
And You Ask Me How Much You're Going To Get Paid
I Think I'm Going To Buy A Plow.
Yes, Pa.
Well, No, Jeanette, I Haven't Asked My Parents Yet.
Because I Have To Get Them Together.
Yeah.
I've Got To Go.
I'll See You In Ten Minutes.
Your First Responsibility:
Go In There And Make Rudy Eat The Brussels Sprouts, Okay?
Sure. Then What Should I Do?
By Then We'll Be Back From The Dance.
Denise, Some Time Ago You Wanted To Ask A Question.
I Wanted To Ask You And Mom.
Mom Is Upstairs Getting Dressed.
We're Going Out.
Now What Is It?
Promise You'll Be Open-Minded?
My Mind Is Open.
Even If It's Something Kids Didn't Do In Your Generation?
Even If It's Not Of My Generation.
Okay. I'd Like Permission To Sleep Away From Home Tonight.
At A Friend's House?
Are You Sleeping At A Stranger's House?
Where Are You Sleeping?
On 32nd Street.
On 32nd Street, Huh?
Where?
On 32nd Street Itself.
Have You Volunteered To Be A Pothole?
No, Daddy, See
The "Walking Lemons" Are Giving A Concert.
"Walking Lemons"?
Ticket Sales Start Tomorrow.
People Are Lining Up Tonight.
Everyone Will Be There.
I Won't Do Anything Wrong.
I Know, Because You're Not Going.
You Did Something Just Like This Once.
Never.
What About The World Series?
The Time You Slept Outside Connie Francis Stadium?
What?
It's Connie Mackstadium.
This Is The Same Thing.
It's Not The Same Thing.
My Father MadeMe Go.
I Would Have Listened To It On The Radio.
Yeah, But You Were Glad For The Experience, Right?
We Went To Connie Mack Stadium
Stood In Line Behind Maybe About 100 People.
And The Rain Started To Pour Down.
I Put A Newspaper Over My Head.
Water Was Coming Down In Drops This Big.
Look At My Forehead.
You Can See Where The Ink...
See Where The Ink Has Pressed In?
And That's Why, On My Forehead--
Can You Still See It?
That's Why They Call It "Headlines."
And Animals Were Lining Up Behind Us Two By Two.
It Was Terrible.
This Really Means A Lot To Me.
You're Not Going.
I Love You.
You're Not Going.
What About Your Open Mind?
32nd Street Closed It Up, Dear.
Vanessa: Theo's Baby-Sitting?
That's Right.
Well, What If The House Catches Fire?
Then Theo Will Call The Fire Department.
Well, What If Burglars Break In?
Then Theo Will Unarm Them.
Well, What If They Know Karate?
Then Theo Will Die.
And You Will Take Over.
Dad...
I Have A Problem.
(Chuckling)
Rudy Won't Eat Her Brussels Sprouts.
You Eat One, Show Her That You're Doing It
Then She'll Eat One.
I Hate Brussels Sprouts.
Then You Have To Outsmart Her.
How?
Tell Her She's The Big Bad Wolf
And The Brussels Sprouts Are The Three Little Pigs.
She Won't Fall For That.
You Did.
I'll Give It A Try.
( Be-Bop On The Stereo)
Daddy, Just Do Me One Favor?
When My Friends Come Over, Don't Do That.
You Have Something Against My Dancing?
It's Embarrassing.
Have You Ever Watched Yourself Dance?
You Just Don't Appreciate
How Far Dance Has Come.
"How Far Dance Has Come."
How Far It's Come?
You Take Some Cardboard, Throw It On The Sidewalk
Spin On Your Head, Neck, Ears And Throat
And Then People Throw Money?
People Doing All That--
There Was A Comedian On Television-- Nipsey Russell--
Said In His Day, It Was Called Having A Fit.
(Ring)
Hello.
Oh, Hold On, Please.
It's For You.
Say You're Sorry.
Sorry.
No, Not In There.
Hello.
Hey, Pat, How You Doing?
Yeah, I Have Her Chart In My Office.
No, I'll Run Down And Get It
And Read It Off To You, Okay?
Fine. No Problem.
Thank You.
Pardon Me.
Stop.
(Doorbell)
Hey. What's Up There?
Hey, How's It Going?
Dad Won't Let Me Go Tonight.
I Can't Go, Either.
My Parents Almost Killed Me.
How Will We Get Tickets?
Everyone's Giving Money To Lizard.
He's Buying Them.
Ahh.
What's Going On Tonight?
We Can Hang Out Here.
Hey, Sounds Great.
We Got Some New Steps To Show You.
Are They Really Fresh?
Absolutely.
I'll Show Dad.
Is There Enough Room Here?
Could We Move The Furniture?
I'll Get My Brother To Help.
Great.
Okay. Pretend You're King Kong
And Those Are The Three Stooges.
Will You Help Move The Furniture?
How Come?
My Friends Want To Dance.
Can I Watch?
Only If You Eat Your Brussels Sprouts.
Are We Ready?
We're Ready.
Let's Do It.
(♪ Funk♪ On A Tape Player)
Denise: Uh-Oh. Get Back.
Do It!
(Doorbell)
How You Doing?
We Don't Have To Go Out.
A Better Party's Going On Here.
Cliff: Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha.
Yeah.
(Music Stops)
All Right.
Denise Invited Some Of Her Young Friends Over
To Tear Our House Up.
We Weren't Bad, Were We?
Not Bad, But You Want To See Real Dancing--
Ralph And Marie
Why Don't You Show Them Your Stuff?
You Want Us To Dance?
Clair, What's Going On?
I Don't Know.
I Just Got Here.
I Just Want To Show Them
How The Old Folks Can Do It.
I Love Coming Here.
You Never Know What Will Happen.
May I Have This Dance?
( Be-Bop On The Stereo)
I'll Show You Guys Some New Stuff, Okay?
We're Going To Double It Up Now.
Show Her How To Do It.
I Got Something To Show You.
Watch This: The Old Stuff.
Keep Kicking, Honey.
One More Time.
I Feel Like
I'm Back In The Old Days.
Not Too Old.
You Think You Can Learn This?
Let It Go!
Hey.