Calling All Partners!
Calling All New Law Partners!
Come On Down And Get Your Breakfast!
I'm Not A Partner Yet.
You Will Be This Afternoon.
That's Why You Should Have A Hearty Breakfast.
I'll Have Coffee.
I'm Too Nervous To Eat.
You've Been With This Firm For Seven Years.
You're The Best Lawyer They've Seen.
You Have Brought In Top-Notch Clients.
On Top Of That, You Have Raised Five Children
And A Very Homely Husband.
Everything Hinges On This One Interview
With This Man I've Never Met.
You Are Charming.
You Are Beautiful.
You Are Intelligent.
And You Are, Because I Know, Ruthless.
You'll Blow This Man Away.
He's Not The Kind Of Man You Blow Away.
He's The Founding Partner.
But Can He Do His Hair And Makeup In Seven Minutes?
I'm Going To Get Dressed.
Mom, You...
Take It Up With Your Father.
Dad, Go Check Rudy.
What's The Matter?
She's Sick.
How Do You Know?
She Woke Me Up Today...
Yeah?
When I Pushed Her Away, She Felt Warm.
I'll Check On Her.
Could I Sleep In Denise's Room Tonight?
I Don't Think That's Necessary.
Could I Wear One Of Your Masks?
Before You Start Worrying About Catching Anything
Let's Find Out If She's Really Sick.
Okay, But I Know She Is.
Have You Written A Prescription For Her Yet?
No, I'm Waiting For A Second Opinion.
Hi, Pumpkin, What's Wrong?
I Don't Feel Good.
Aha.
Okay.
Well, Now, Where Does It Hurt?
All Over.
Bobo's Sick, Too.
Where Does Bobo Hurt?
His Throat.
His Throat Hurts. Okay.
Well, Uh...
No, No. I'll Look At Bobo Later.
You Slide Over This Way.
That's Fine.
Now, Just Relax.
Does That Hurt?
How About Here?
How About When You Swallow?
Yes.
Open Up A Little Bit.
You Can Open
Bigger Than That.
I Can See Your Feet.
Yeah!
Okay.
Vanessa Says Rudy's Sick?
Uh, Yeah.
Did You Check Her Glands?
Yes, They're Slightly Swollen.
Is There Swelling?
Just A Little...
We Should Call A Doctor.
Did You Take
Her Temperature?
No...
He Has To Take Bobo's First.
Cliff, Take The Bear's Temperature, Please.
All Right, Bobo
Put This Under Your Tongue And Don't Bite Down.
She Can't Go To School
And I Have That Interview.
I'll Call Mrs. Davis.
We Don't Need Her.
I Don't Work Until 1:00.
You're Back By Then.
You Don't Cater To Sick Children Like I Do.
If I Weren't Here, You Wouldn't Be Taking Bobo's Temperature.
Bobo Does Not Have A Pulse.
What's Bobo's Temperature?
Zero.
Come On.
Which Is Just Above Normal For A Bear This Size.
Now, Bobo, I Want You To Stay Warm
Drink Plenty Of Liquids
And No Salmon Fishing For At Least A Week.
What?
Where Are You Going?
To School.
Is It Scarecrow Day?
Everybody's Dresses Like This At A Slob Rally.
Didn't You Do That?
Only In Medical School.
We Were So Tired, We Didn't Know What We Were Wearing.
Is This Okay?
No, But If Everyone Else Is Not Okay, It's Okay.
See You Later.
I Need You To Sign My History Paper.
You Do This Every Time.
You Give Me The Paper
And You Put Your Hand Over Whatever It Is.
I Can't See What It Is.
Take Your Hand Off.
Okay.
A "B+"?
I Asked The Teacher.
It's Not A Mistake.
It's A "B+"!
I Took Your Advice.
While I Was Writing, No Tv, No Music, No Food.
I'm Proud Of You.
An "A" Would Have Been Better.
An "A" Is Great.
The Fact That You Applied Yourself Is What's Important.
Thanks, Dad.
Thank You.
Cliff.
Did You See The "B+"?
Yes.
Here's A List.
Keep Her In Bed.
Give Her Liquids And Aspirin.
I Don't Believe You.
You Went To Law School And Got A Degree In Medicine.
I'll Try To Keep This Meeting Brief.
If Her Temperature Shoots Up, Call Me.
Hey.
Yes?
You Look Nice.
Thank You.
Hey.
Yeah?
Tomorrow, I'm Going To Celebrate By Taking Out The New Partner.
Okay?
Wish Me Luck.
Good Luck.
I Have A Wife Who's About To Become A Partner
In One Of The Most Prestigious Law Firms In The Country
A Son Who Got A "B+" On A Book Report
And Said It Was Because
He Believes Now That He Should Apply Himself.
I'm In Seventh Heaven.
Rudy: Daddy!
Yeah?
Did Mommy Leave?
Yeah.
What Do You Want?
Mommy.
Do Horses Get Sick?
Yes.
That's Why There Are Veterinarians.
Do Dinosaurs Get Sick?
In The Old Days, The Tarynaronosauramises--
Ooh, Those Dudes, They Would Be From Here All The Way Downtown.
And You Don't Want To See One Get A Head Cold And Sneeze.
You'll Have To Hold On To Your Bed, Jack.
Vanessa Said I Have Germs.
What Kind Are They?
Oh, Yeah.
See, You Have...
You Have The, Uh... The Tryptopendantpernsaps.
Tryptoperensaps?
The Tryps, As They Like To Call Themselves
They Hang Around Water Fountains And Glasses
And Things Like That.
And They Keep Saying, "Where's The Party?
"I Love To Party.
I Just Love To Just Get Inside Of A Young Body And Just Party."
Why Me?
They Chose You Because You're Young And You're Cute.
They Go Inside Your Body
And Say, "It's A Lovely Place To Party."
And They Start To Move Around All Fast.
"Ooh, This Is A Hot Party."
Then They Bump Into The Corpuscles
And Do The Boogie Down, "Party, Party, Party."
How Do I Get Rid Of Them?
You Drink A Lot Of Liquids.
The Liquids Go In Your Body And Cool You Down.
The Tryps, They're Out There Saying
"It's Getting Kind Of Chilly In Here."
They Don't Care For That Much.
And Then
You Take Some Aspirin, You Understand?
You Put The Aspirin In.
Aspirin To A Trypsocornomanomenanus
Is Just Like Beets To A Girl I Know Named Rudy Huxtable.
Yuck!
And If You Really Want To Get Them
You Gargle.
You Take This Stuff And Gargle.
(Gargling)
That Causes A Vibration That's Like An Earthquake.
Now The Trypsacordamama Are Like This.
You Give Them The Aspirin, And They're Going--
"Yuck, Yuck."
And Then You Add The Earthquake, They Say, "Oh, God."
They Get Up And Say, "Whoa, Let's Get Out Of Here."
And They're Gone.
Do You Feel Better?
Yes!
Are We Ready To Get Rid Of The Tryptomondplamenisis?
Yes!
Come On.
Now, We're Going To Take Three Of These Chewable Aspirin.
What's The Matter?
Mommy Crushes Them.
Okay, Three Chewable Aspirin
Crushed, Just Like Mommy Would Crush Them.
Walking Like Mommy.
What's The Matter?
Mommy Puts Orange Juice In It.
Mommy Putting Orange Juice In And Walking Like Mommy.
Okay.
Orange Juice
In The Crushed Aspirin.
Stirring And Smiling, Just Like Mommy.
Okay.
Coming Up.
Mommy Does An Airplane.
Single Engine Or Jet?
Single Engine!
Okay.
Coming Up.
(Imitating Single Engine Aircraft)
Open Up. Open Up.
There You Go.
Oh, Boy.
Looks Good.
Thank You, Daddy.
You're Welcome, Dear.
(Gargling)
No More Parties In There.
I Don't Know, Cliff.
Mr. Halifax Is Already 45 Minutes Late.
Are You Sure Everything Is Okay?
Are You Sure?
I'll Be Home... Bye.
Huxtable?
Yes.
Halifax.
Pleased To Meet You.
Sorry I'm Late.
I Had To Say Hello
To Barney, The Elevator Operator.
He's An Old Friend.
Nervous?
A Little.
I Checked Your Record-- You're Good.
Thank You.
Did You Have Breakfast?
Never Skip Breakfast-- Most Important Meal Of The Day.
I Always Have Oatmeal, Milk And A Drop Of Honey.
Two Eggs-- Poached--
Bacon, Rye Toast And A Martini.
Auerbach Says You Handle Yourself Well In Court.
I'm Glad He's Noticed.
I've Had A...
Auerbach's Good.
Charlie Patterson And I Hired Him.
Mr. Patterson Retired Before I...
Charlie Patterson Introduced Me To My Haberdasher, Joe Drucker.
Joe's Gone Now. He's Passed On.
Joe Sold Me This Tie.
Nice.
They Don't Make Ties Like This Anymore-- Feel It.
What Are You Feeling?
Silk.
Quality.
You Can't Beat Quality When It Comes To Clothes Or Lawyers.
This Tie Will Never Go Out Of Style.
Mr. Auerbach And I Have Worked Very Closely...
Do You Skip Lunch, Too?
Not Usually.
I Always Have The Same Thing:
Mushroom Barley, Rye Bread, A Garden Salad And A Martini.
Where's Mommy?
Mom Called And Said She Would Be A Little Late.
Why Do I Have To Stay Down Here?
Because This Is One Floor Above Dad's Office.
So You'll Be Closer To Me.
Why Do I Have To Stay On The Couch?
Couch? This Isn't A Couch.
Yes, It Is.
This Is A Super-Duper Get-Well Island, You See.
This Whole Thing Here.
And On The Super-Duper Island You Have Your Own Telephone
And Now You're Going To Have Your Little Books To Mark In.
Do Your Letters And Numbers.
All This Will Help You Feel Better.
I Feel Better Now.
This Is The Telephone.
To Reach Daddy, You Dial...
3-3-1.
And That's All You Dial.
The Last Time You Dialed A Lot Of Numbers
You Called The Honduras.
Stay On The Island, Don't Get Off Of It, All Right?
All Right.
Ahh!
Get Back In There.
Those Fish Are Going To Bite Your Toes Off.
They're Not Biting My Toes.
Mr. Yamato.
Every Time We Talk About
What Will Happen In The Delivery Room
He Passes Out.
When Did This Start?
When He Saw The Childbirth Film In Class.
Now Whenever You Mention "The Film" He's Gone.
I'm Fine, Let Me Up.
You Fainted, Honey.
I'm Fine Now.
Take It Easy.
Would You Like Some Water?
No, Thanks.
Where Were We?
You Said You Want To Be In The Deliver Room.
Yes, I Want To Support Janet.
Now, When You Saw The Film...
Doctor!
Sorry.
Okay, Mr. Yamato, Just Take It Easy.
I Have To Be There To Help Janet.
That's Wonderful.
But I Want You To Know
That When A Woman Is In Transition
There's A Change.
This Woman Will Have The Strength Of Ten Men.
And This Lovely Person That You Know
May Call You Names That You've Never Heard Before.
Janet?
Yes. What Did They Say After The Film?
No, I'm Sorry.
I Said, "After The Film."
Yeah, Just Put Your Head Down Here.
(Buzzer)
Just A Minute, Please.
Hello.
Yeah, Rudy.
No, Not Now.
You Can't Have Any Ice Cream.
No, You Stay On The Island, Please!
Yes, Do Your Book.
No Matter What Happens, Stay On The Island.
Mr. Yamato, I Was Wondering
Are You Aware That An Awful Lot Of Fathers
Do Mental Coaching?
Mental Coaching?
From The Lobby.
You See, There Are Many Husbands Who Stay In The Lobby
And They Mentally Coach Their Wives From Back There
While Their Wives Are In The Delivery Room Having Labor.
Labor?
Labor... Whoa.
I'm Sorry. I Didn't Say "Film."
Film?
"And The Baby Bear Said:
"'Somebody Has Been Eating My Porridge And It's All Gone.'
Big Papa Bear Said, 'Somebody Has...'"
Hi, Rudy.
Mommy!
How Are You Feeling?
Fine.
Give Me A Kiss?
Did Your Daddy Give You Aspirin?
Yes.
Did He Do The Airplane?
He Did Everything.
Howdy, Partner!
I Don't Know That Yet, Cliff.
What Did He Say?
Everything.
He Talked And Talked Until He Fell Asleep.
What Did You Do?
I Started To Wake Him Up, But That Didn't Seem Right.
So I Left Because Rudy Was Home Alone.
Are You Kidding? She's Not Home Alone.
The Child Is Just Above My Office.
I Did Everything You Asked.
I Know You Did Everything, But I Wanted It Done By Me.
We're Going Up To Your Room.
Say Good-Bye To Your Island.
Bye, Fishies.
What About The Partnership?
(Ring)
Dr. Huxtable.
Mr. Auerbach?
Yeah.
Huh?
She Is?
Who?
Okay, Put Him On.
Mr. Halifax?
How Are You, Sir?
This Is Dr. Huxtable.
Well, She's... What?
No, I've Not Been To That Restaurant.
Thin Slice Of Veal, Potato And A Martini.
No, I Think He Was Way Before My Wife's Time.
Yeah, I'll Let You Talk To Her Right Now.
Sir?
Yeah, Bow Ties Are Wonderful.
You're A Partner, You're A Partner.
And I'm Taking The Partner Out, And We're Going To Celebrate.
No, You Are Not.
Because The Partner Is Taking You Out.
And We're Going To Celebrate With Dinner And Dancing.
All Right, Miss Money.
What About Tito Puente?
You Got It.
We'll See Him.
Let's Tell The Children!
Uh-Huh.