[vehicle passing by]
[horn blaring]
[vehicle brakes hissing]
[vehicle pulling away]
[indistinct chatter]
[train rattling]
So, you've been good, right?
I mean, other than this?
He seems okay. At least better than how I was picturing.
Not too different than last time I was here.
Hard to tell whether he's in pain. I mean, at least while he's asleep.
But you've been on top of that, yes?
Because I think that's the thing, is for it to be as painless as possible.
The trick is, I guess, the thing I'm saying
is that I hope we can make this easy on him.
Just not make a thing out of anything.
If we disagree, we talk it out without getting heated, or yelling,
or anything that's going to upset him.
We handle it like adults, like the age we are.
I really don't see what there is to disagree about anyways.
At the end of the day, the hard truth is he's dying.
There's nothing either one of us can do to stop that from happening.
I'm not trying to be cold, but it's a matter of being there for him,
being here.
Things from the past don't matter, not right now.
If there are things to work out, they can wait.
I really hope you agree.
I'm upset. I know you are too. We all are. It's hard. It sucks.
Let's not make it harder, okay?
I did see…
I did see that the DNR never got signed like I asked.
Quite a few times.
I got it, it's not that easy.
Well, it was easy, actually. Now it's a lot harder.
I'm not making this a thing.
I'm just saying it's harder now that he's not seeing doctors.
I have to get Dr. Sanders here, or someone who can witness his signature,
and it would've been just a lot simpler when you were taking him in.
I don't know how much time I have.
He has.
It's important.
It's really important.
[footsteps approaching]
He opened his eyes for a bit. [breathes shakily]
That was nice. He knows we're here.
I could tell that made him happy.
[crying] I know.
I promise I won't be like this the whole time.
I'm not going to just cry through it all. Just for now.
[sighs]
It's weird to be away, you know, from Mirabella and David.
That's part of it.
-It's really my first time. -[woman 1] You could've brought them.
No, no, it's good they're not here.
They're fine.
I'd rather the memory be from our last visit.
He was better. That's what hurts about this more.
He was still sick, of course, but he was still so there,
so able.
I just didn't think things would get to this, not so suddenly.
I've seen too many movies, probably, especially the ones made for children.
With Mirabella these past couple of years, everything's so nice, bright.
Even if they get heavy,
there's a beauty and clarity to it all.
This feels so real.
I'm rambling. I'm sorry. It's the jet lag.
I get even more emotional when I fly.
[sighs]
Anyway…
It's nice that it's us, just us.
This is the way it should be. The way he would want it.
I interrupted something. I'm sorry. [breathes deeply]
How are you, Rachel? I feel like we haven't spoken since Thanksgiving.
How are you?
I'm all good.
I don't know what you want me to say. I'm good. That's basically it.
[woman 1] Well, she's definitely high. The whole place stinks like weed.
Fuck yeah, I'm high.
High as a motherfucker.
First thing I do in the morning is I roll a blunt,
then I smoke at least three more throughout the day.
You know why? ‘Cause that's how I do shit.
I don't care that you smoke weed.
It's just not right to smoke it in the house when someone is sick.
Well, Daddy doesn't mind.
Uh, trust me, I've been smoking around him all this time,
and he never had an issue.
In fact, he likes the smell.
Told me more than a few times.
It's the smoke. The smoke, not the smell. The man is dying. Just go outside.
Damn, it took you five minutes.
Five minutes, right? To just get in my shit.
A second ago it was, "Let's just get along."
Yes. Yes. Let's settle down. There's no reason for this to be an issue.
And for her to take her shitty weed and smoke it outside.
Shitty weed?
Oh, please. No, I get top-shelf.
Not that dog shit you smoked all day long, right?
-You think I forgot? -[woman 1] That was high school.
I've grown up quite a lot since then, unlike others.
Grown up? Still a bitch.
[woman 3] Rachel, Katie, no. Let's just stop.
Look.
Hi. Were you trying to find us?
Please, please. Come sit down.
[inhales]
-I'm sorry, we were-- -[man] No. No need to apologize.
I understand what a stressful situation it is.
It's natural.
It's a hard time.
While my partner Mirabella was in the room with your father,
I was hoping to talk you through where we are at the moment.
[woman 3] "Mirabella"?
That's my daughter's name.
-[whispers] Wow. -[man] Really? It's a beautiful name.
-She's three. -Oh, that's nice.
It's also very nice that you're all here at a time like this.
It's not always like that.
Things happen in families.
Sometimes people can't be here because of medical reasons.
Sometimes it's just, you know, other things.
I understand his wife passed some years ago.
He was married twice.
Yes, she did.
Breast cancer about 20 years ago, right?
[man] Sorry to hear that. I don't know what that process was like,
but I think it would be helpful to understand the process here
now that your father's off food and liquid.
I, or Mirabella, or both of us, if possible,
will be here each morning around this time,
but you will have my number.
I'll do my best to answer any questions or come here if need be.
It will be us you call when he does pass.
We can make the declaration of death
unless a medical reason brings him to the hospital beforehand.
I'm sorry. It's just so weird that's her name.
I keep picturing my daughter when you mention her.
Please, go on. Sorry.
So,
it's good news that your father responds well to the pain treatment.
His cancer is very advanced, and when we are in pain,
our bodies naturally try to fight it,
even if it's actually just hurting us more.
His ease will possibly quicken the process in a organic way.
That's really the big difference between hospice and hospital care,
which aims to extend life.
As painless as possible is our goal always.
But another thing is,
it's not just our bodies that affect the length of time it takes to pass.
I can't tell you the science on this,
but I can tell you in the 12 years I've been working in hospice,
it has become very clear to me that the mind
-is just as big a factor as the body. -[exhales]
And that's really where you can be a huge help,
in case he's holding on, not wanting to go out of fear.
You can help by letting him know, by reassuring him,
that it's okay.
The mind doesn't have the power to heal or reverse the disease,
not at the stage it is,
but if he knows he'll be okay,
that you all will be okay,
it could mean a great deal.
[breathes deeply]
-[Katie] Sorry. Angel, right? -Mm-hmm.
Angel, that's quite a name considering what you do.
I… I wanted to ask you,
my father was supposed to sign a DNR, a do-not-resuscitate form.
But for whatever reason, it didn't happen while he was still going to his doctors.
It's still important to him, though,
which is why I wanted to know how much time he had.
I get it. It's not a simple math equation.
Well, he wasn't clear.
It sounds like it could happen anytime, or it could be a few days, maybe longer.
You should see him. He doesn't look well.
It was only a month ago I saw him, I think,
but it seems like years looking at him now.
The plan is, at least at the moment, I'll stay here.
We all will take turns watching over.
We'll be together when it happens.
I'm sure that if I left, the moment I left and got too far to rush back
is when it would happen, you know?
Can you hear that?
That's Christina singing to him in his room right now.
I don't know. Let's just hope it's not the Grateful Dead.
That would kill him right away. [chuckles] He hated that music as much as I did.
She's fine. She's good. At least, she appears to be, like always.
Hope the singing doesn't go on too much. Could kill me. [chuckles]
She's…
She's exactly who she's always been.
I asked her to do one simple thing, get the damn DNR signed,
which now is much more complicated to do.
I was hoping the hospice guy could help, but it seems I need to somehow
get a physician here to the house and time it again, somehow,
to know when he's awake and somewhat coherent.
She's out now.
I asked her to stop smoking in the house, and she got upset.
It's like she can't wait till he's dead so the apartment will be hers.
See if I give a fuck what she does in here after that.
Not my responsibility.
[lighter clicking]
[horn honks]
[door opens]
[door shuts]
Rachel, what are you doing?
You know you can't be doing that out here.
Victor!
[coughs]
Ah. What the fuck are you doing, man?
-Fucking my whole shit up. -[Victor chuckles]
You shouldn't be doing your whole shit here.
That's the problem.
Shit's legal now.
What, are you stuck in the ‘90s when you last blazed?
Please. [chuckles]
I smoke every night,
but when I get home, inside my own apartment.
You know how it is here.
These people lose it when someone smokes a cigarette out here.
They ask me to call the cops. It's crazy.
Look, why aren't you inside,
where I can just call you with a complaint,
and you can tell me to go fuck myself?
Okay, uh,
last one.
[exhales]
[Rachel exhales]
You know, it's my bitch-ass sister, huh?
She's trying to tell me the smoke is killing our dad.
[Victor] How is Vinnie?
Oh, he's fucking dying, but not ‘cause of my weed smoke.
Uh, she's just a fucking, uh…
It's always gotta be something.
And now she's got me out here trying to chill, getting yelled at by you.
No disrespect. You know I love you, Victor,
but, uh, she's the one you should be yelling at, not me.
I, uh…
I'm just trying to maintain, you know?
[door slams shut]
Hey, do you want to come in and join us?
The nurse is about to show up,
and we could all circle around him before she gets here.
We could sing to him.
Or if you want, you and he could be alone together. That's fine, too.
He's just sleeping, but he looks super peaceful.
Are you sure?
Okay.
Well, if you change your mind.
I don't want you to feel like we've invaded your space at all.
[monitor beeping]
[items thudding]
Christina?
Christina.
Yeah?
This is what's in here.
Not just one bag of apples, three bags.
And you know what? All of them look old.
They've gone soft, and that's it. Seriously, you can see for yourself.
Three bags of apples,
some old condiments from who knows when, and that's it.
I mean, really, how old is she?
I can run out now and do some shopping.
No, I'll go, but that's not the point.
Damien is nine, and he can take better care of himself.
The moment Dad wasn't able, I mean, this is all she got.
That's just the last few weeks.
What the hell is gonna happen to her afterwards?
I can tell you one thing, it's not gonna be us.
You live across the country and have a family to take care of.
And I have enough on my plate with my own. More than enough.
She is so fucked, but it can't become my problem.
[Christina] She's out shopping right now.
Yeah, she's staying here too.
We're taking shifts watching over him. There's a nurse in with him now.
She comes for four hours each day around now.
It's fine.
No, I can't guess how long.
No one can. And I don't want to guess, but… [inhales]
…I think I'll be home soon.
It's fine.
It's fine. Thanks.
I just want to hear how things are there. Are you guys having fun?
[cheering on TV]
[commentator 1] …see if they go right back to Kadeem Jack.
[cheering continues]
Here's Jack.
-Hangs in the air… -[whistle blows]
…and commits the offensive foul.
Personal foul on Jack.
[commentator 2] What they got him with, Eric, nice rip-through move,
but watch the inside or left arm. Good call.
He's…
[Christina] I miss you. I miss you both so damn much.
It hasn't even been a day yet,
and all I can think about is getting back there to you both.
‘Cause this is so not home anymore.
I'm so lucky. No, you have no idea. Trust me…
[commentator 1] …starting five that began the game.
Dekker out dealing with concussion-like symptoms.
Is that her?
Yes?
Yes, please.
[gasps]
My angel.
[chuckles]
Yes. Yes, it's me. It's Mommy.
[inhales] Hello, my sweet, beautiful Mirabella.
Have you been missing me?
I heard you've been having so much fun with Papa.
No. I'm crying because I'm just so happy to be hearing your voice. Mommy's not sad.
She's…
She's happy because she loves you
and cannot wait to see you.
Mirabella, do you know what?
I met a woman today.
She helps people.
She's like a doctor.
Well, she is… she is a doctor.
And guess what her name is.
[items clatter]
[clattering continues]
How does he seem?
He's still asleep.
We have another half hour with the nurse.
Ale… Aleswon… Alejuan… Alijan. She's nice.
-Do we feed her? There's enough. -I can ask.
Maybe. Yes.
She probably wants to get home. Who knows how long she has to travel.
But, yes, I think. Let's offer.
If anything, it will help if she doesn't hate us.
And what about her?
I don't want to intrude on her privacy.
[speaks gibberish]
I'll let her know there's food and she's invited.
Right. Right, I made food for her. You can tell her that.
I made food for her if she wants.
Let the nurse know, and then let her know.
Anything green. I have no idea why. If it's green, she won't eat it.
We have seriously considered dyeing her food, just a little food color.
Seriously. I mean, she wouldn’t know if a cucumber was purple.
[Katie] Hmm.
Well, maybe it would confuse her when she gets older.
[Katie] Well, you can count on that. Won't be the only thing.
Lots of things to confuse them when they get older.
[Christina] Have things become a bit better?
With Tracey?
Better is relative. What do you mean better?
Is she talking to us? Yes.
Is she a full-of-shit, snotty teenager most of the time,
treating us, me especially, like an enemy
whose only job as a parent is to stop her from doing what she wants?
Yes.
I don't… I don't…
Let's not, okay?
How do you like the food?
-What's that? -[Katie] Food.
The food that I made, are you enjoying it?
Yeah, I like the food that you made. Uh…
Thank you for making the food that you made.
The food you made taste good.
Uh, I got a parlay going. I'm on the final team.
That's why I'm looking at my phone. I am working.
You mean you're watching a game that you bet on?
Yeah. I, uh,
bet on 413, so 10 bucks to make 270.
You think watching will change its outcome?
Thank you for the dinner.
-[Katie snickers] -[plates clatter]
Watch her not even wash her dishes.
[gentle piano music playing]
[dog barks]
[monitor beeping]
[Mirabella] I twirled!
[lighter clicking]
[train clacking]
[horn honks]
[sounds fade]
[Katie humming]
[door opens, shuts]
[Katie] That's funny.
Your shirt.
Oh, yeah. I found it in one of the boxes in our room.
I should go through them all and take with me what I want
and get rid of the rest, but…
Yeah, I was… I was happy to find it.
You still love them, but you don't still go to shows, do you?
I've been known to drive a few hours if need be.
John Mayer?
Sure.
Sure. Family's family.
Weren't you asleep? You were with him till 4:00.
I can't sleep when I know they have to get to school.
I was texting all of them.
Jay's worse than the kids, but he got them there.
So that's something.
Tracey skipped breakfast, of course.
I slept a bit before. I'll get some more later.
You know she hasn't done a shift, right?
Who?
Oh, yeah.
I'm not sure.
I should probably get back in there with him.
-I'll just get some water. -You don't find that strange?
Once we get here, she steps back from all responsibility?
[faint thud]
The coffee's still hot.
[Christina] Thank you.
I'm working on his obituary. It'd be good if you could read over when you can.
Yes, I understand that.
But if he can't do it,
I need someone to come here who can authorize his signature.
This is extremely important to him.
I understand that, yes, but here we are, and now he's too sick to go anywhere.
He can die any minute, so really, I just need a solution.
[door opens]
-Yes, please. I'll wait. -[door shuts]
[doorbell buzzes]
-That's going to be Angel and Mirabella. -[Christina] Yep, I got it.
[door opens]
[water running]
[indistinct chatter]
[Angel] I find that listening to that, things will be better.
[Katie] Mmm.
[Rachel] Hey.
Morning.
Rachel, right?
Put some clothes on and join us.
Angel was just telling us about where he thinks things are.
Sure.
-[coffee pours] -[pot clanks]
How about some coffee?
[Angel] So, yeah.
I was saying to your sisters that Vincent appears to me
to be much further along than when I saw him yesterday.
I don't want to imply that I know when he will pass.
I say my guesses have been as wrong as much as they have been right,
and I have seen a few people in a similar condition as your father
hold on for a lot longer than I would have thought.
I'm just saying, please prepare yourself,
especially for him to become even less coherent.
Have you been able to have any conversations recently?
-Yes. I mean, small ones. -[Angel] Hmm.
There are windows when he says a few words in response to something.
He's thought I was someone I'm not, or asked for something
that doesn't make sense.
He still seems to think that he has work or a deadline of some kind.
[Angel] Work is a big one.
I mean, even if the job sucked, you know,
and the person couldn't wait for the day to retire.
Even still, it could be the cycle of familiarity that's needed right now.
I'm hoping that you all will, if you want,
take any windows you can to say anything you feel must be said.
If you want.
Now would be the time.
[Katie] This DNR form.
-[Angel] Right. -[Katie] It's hard to get someone here,
and now with what you were saying, it feels even more impossible.
Yes, yes. I understand this is really important for you.
For him.
I know what happens, what can happen, without one.
EMTs cracked the ribs of my close friend's mother,
almost all of them,
trying to bring her back after she just about passed peacefully.
The poor lady was left brain-dead for another three weeks.
Completely broken and bruised.
And that's not something my father wants.
When he goes, he should be allowed to go.
You understand that, right?
I do. I do.
Sometimes…
Sometimes, people don't call EMT right away
when they believe their loved one has passed away.
Sometimes, they're not completely sure,
and that can delay that call for a while.
Right. Right.
But what happens if he suddenly needs to go to the hospital for some reason?
I am a firm believer in do-not-resuscitate orders.
I just can't sign them.
[gentle piano music playing]
[exhales]
-Yeah? -[Katie] Here's the thing.
I get that you don't wanna go in his room.
Sure, I was there till 4:00 a.m., and Christina's been in there since.
The help would be appreciated.
Everyone deals with death their own way, and I won't tell you what to do.
That's between you and him
and however you think you should run your life.
But what I will ask you to do is not act like a teenager
and sneak smoking in the bathroom.
It's not sneaking. The whole place reeks of it.
I'm not asking for you to do it for him, even though he can't speak for himself.
I'm asking for me.
I'm asking you to respect me and my wishes,
and while he's alive and I'm here, to smoke outside. That's it.
Afterwards, this'll be your place. Your name's on the lease.
You'll be free to do what you want, and I'll have no say.
You want rotten apples in the fridge? Not my business.
You want to do bong hits all day and all night? Not my business.
But for now, whenever you step outside to smoke,
think, "I am respecting Katie,"
and I'll know you are respecting me, okay?
Sure.
[lighter clicks]
[door opens]
I don't want to hear about it, Victor. I'm not in the mood.
-[Victor] Rachel. -Look, I love you, Victor, but fuck off.
Just call whoever you want, do whatever you want.
I really do not give a fuck. Shit's legal is all I know. [sighs]
Goddamn right.
The fuck out of here with that bullshit.
[lighter clicks]
[door opens, shuts]
How you doing? You doing okay?
[man] You know, you know. Just trying to get by.
Oh yeah, I do know.
I sure do know, brother.
I'd say take a seat, but I see you got the little ones.
[man] Oh, it's all good.
Oh, they'll be out here soon enough. Don't worry about it.
Lighting up a big fatty of their own, huh?
-[man] Don't I know it. Don't I know it. -[Rachel] Yeah.
Fucking kids.
[footsteps approaching]
[Christina sighs deeply]
I came out, thought I'd get a bit of air.
It's easy to forget the outside exists, you know?
It’s good to step out and take a breath.
[sighs]
I haven't sat here for a long time, probably years,
but it's… it's nice. I forgot about it.
I definitely remember taking some time out here just sitting.
I remember needing it.
It's strange the things we forget, the things that are good for you,
like just stepping out of things for a minute.
How are you?
I know this can't be easy,
having Katie and I invade your space the way we have.
Uh, it's not my space.
No. Well, it is. I mean, it's Dad's and yours,
but, you know, soon it will be yours. [sighs]
I'm planning on getting my storage out,
either in the garbage or back home with me.
I'm sorry I left things in there as long as I have.
I… I won't leave you with that.
Uh, I don't care. [exhales]
It's not in my room, not my business.
Well, I do. And I'm just saying there's no reason for it to stay there.
I have plenty of space.
Too much space. [chuckles]
I guess enough for another child when the time comes,
but Mirabella's a handful as it is, you know?
It's hard to imagine two, but they say it gets easier.
That's what they say at least.
I know David's ready.
What about you?
What about me?
Kids.
Do you want children?
I'm sorry, but you're crazy.
No offense, just kind of nuts.
I am?
[chuckles]
What do you mean "crazy"?
How? In what way, really?
Uh, I don't know.
Maybe it's all those mushrooms and shit you took.
Fucking Grateful Dead. I mean, that's some wacky shit.
Yeah.
Yeah, right.
You know… Hmm…
You know, it's not really like that.
I'm sure for some, but…
it was never about that for me.
[chuckles softly]
Okay, okay, I'm just playing. I… I'm high. That's it. Forget it.
Uh, no, no. I am not thinking of having kids.
-It's fine. -[Rachel sniffles]
Trust me, I got it a lot in the past.
People have this picture of me naked in the mud
and all that Woodstock stuff, but the… the truth is the shows,
it's… it's just a group of people who look out for each other.
That's it.
Everyone
connected by this one love of music,
which allows them to connect, and to relate, and to care.
It's for people who
haven't found that anywhere else, weren't given that,
and had to
find it for themselves.
Yeah. At least for some, not everyone.
I should probably walk for a bit.
[sighs] I'll pick up some food.
Do you want anything specific, anything in particular?
[Rachel] No, I'm good. Thanks.
Okay. I'll see you soon.
Yep.
See you soon.
[Rachel sighs]
I was given your number from Dr. Robert Sanders' office
as a potential place that can make a house call.
Well, my father… my father is very sick.
He's dying.
Thanks. Yes.
And he wants to sign a do-not-resuscitate form,
but is too sick to come in.
Yes, he's conscious.
I mean, not all the time. He's in hospice care here at home.
-Do you think the doctor would-- -[Christina] Katie? Katie?
His breathing, it's gotten really strange. Something's happening.
[monitor alarm beeping]
-[knocking on door] -[Katie] Daddy?
-Rachel, you should come. -[Katie] Dad, can you hear me?
His breathing, something's wrong.
[Katie] Dad?
I'm not getting it. There's no… He's not responding. Okay. Um…
Okay, I think we should… Um, I think we should call 911.
-[Christina] No. -[Katie] We should.
-[Christina] No. I should call Angel. -[Katie] Okay.
[monitor alarm beeping]
[monitor alarm stops]
[monitor beeping normally]
[Katie sighs]
-[Christina] He's okay. -[Katie] He's okay.
-[Christina] He's okay. -[Katie chuckles]
[both chuckling]
[Rachel breathing deeply]
[Katie] Oh.
[corkscrew clatters]
-[Katie chuckling] Oh my fucking God. -[chuckles]
[Christina] Yeah, that was crazy.
-I thought-- -[Katie sighs]
-[sniffles, exhales] -I don't know.
Well, I do know that fucker's strong, damn it.
-Can't count him out till he's ready. -[Christina chuckles]
-[Christina] You're celebrating? -[Katie] Better believe it.
I knew there was a reason why I got wine. Didn’t know it’d be for celebrating life.
But, hey, I'll pour you some.
Uh, just a… just a little bit. Angel said he was gonna be here soon.
We really shouldn't be partying when he gets here.
That could be a bad look.
Angel.
Angel of Death is more like it.
[sighs] Just drink it.
Cheers to Dad.
-[glasses clink] -[Katie sighs]
Oh.
[breathes deeply]
You got what he was saying before, right, Angel?
Don't call him or anyone else till Dad's good and dead.
Make sure the guy's not breathing and then some.
[laughs hesitantly]
I should go back to his room and make sure things are steady.
[glass thuds]
Angel of Death comes in and plucks him away.
Go on.
[commentator 1] Deep inside, rolls it in with the right hand.
[commentator 2] And that play, that dr…
-[commentator 3] Playing with… -[man] Don't do that. Stop doing that.
[Rachel] No, I need to see both. I have money on both.
[man] It doesn't matter. Just watch one.
Annoying as fuck going back and forth.
Pick which ever one matters more and stick to it.
I don't even know what's going on with either of them.
It's just back and forth, back and forth.
Right?
-[commentator 2] Nice job by Nigel Hayes. -[chuckles] Thank you.
[commentator 2] Getting extra possession. How do you do that? Giving up your body.
Gasser does it there.
We have to go outside to smoke that.
[commentator 2] …go the other way.
-It's been requested. -[timer buzzes]
We're watching a game.
-Sorry, it's not worth it. -[whistle blows]
It's no problem at all. It's my job.
I'm glad you called while I was close enough to come as quick as I could.
Another 30 minutes, I would've been headed to Queens.
Well, obviously, we're happy that he's still with us,
but about the sound he made when his breathing got hard…
My concern, our concern, is that he's in pain.
Yes, and Mirabella should be looking into this right now.
Tolerance to the drip definitely goes up, as does pain.
For sure I suggest we increase the morphine.
It… It's just a fine line that we must figure out.
Enough to help, but not to kill.
When Mirabella's ready, she'll come out and tell us.
But you see what I was saying before, right?
We could've called 911.
We would've if the breathing continued like that for a while.
It was clear he was in pain, and we don't know what to do.
I do. I did. And trust me, the last thing anyone wants
is that in-between place.
We all want him to transition as peaceful as possible.
But Mirabella should be a help.
She'll tell us exactly how much more can be administered.
What if the same thing happens?
He's in pain and we give him more than what she recommends.
[Angel exhales]
Well, you can't intentionally do that. That's looked upon as murder in this city,
most of this country at this time,
even if it is asked for by the patient.
The only way you could do that is to make a mistake,
for it to be unintentional.
Maybe someone didn't measure the amount correctly.
Sometimes, if the amount is just over, it can be lethal.
I don't know, but mistakes have been made, and accidents are natural, right?
I'm sorry that he was in pain.
I understand how terrible that must have been for you to witness,
but here he is with you and not in the hospital
with hope that things will continue ahead as peaceful as possible.
Angel of motherfucking Death.
Did I call it, or did I call it?
He's trying to be helpful. You're the one who's asking him.
Oh, I know, and he is. Trust me, I appreciate it.
But I'm not aiming to overdose our dad accidentally as Angel suggested.
I just don't want him to be hurting.
We should figure out dinner while the nurse is still here.
Okay. You don't want to go there.
-That's fine. -[door opens]
You want wine? There's two glasses left in this bottle.
-There's another if we wanna-- -I'm okay.
[door shuts, locks]
Rachel?
[footsteps approaching]
Yeah. Is there a problem?
Is there a problem? You tell me.
Look, please don't start, all right? We smoked outside like you asked.
Now we're in my room taking care of ourselves.
You don't think it's a bit weird? I mean, it's kind of strange, no?
Having a random person over to the house now at a time like this.
Is it right to have a stranger here when he may pass at any minute?
He's not random.
Benjy and I have been hanging out for a while now.
Just 'cause you don't know him doesn't mean he's a stranger.
And Daddy likes him. That's what matters.
Okay.
-I think you should go easier on her. -[door shuts]
All she has is easy.
[Christina] I mean, it was terrifying. I was so sure he was going.
His breathing sounded crazy, his face…
Man, I hope I can get that image out of my mind.
[inhales]
Yes, they've given him more now. He's sleeping.
I don't know if there'll be any more windows.
I'm okay. At least that means I should be coming home soon.
It's okay. It's okay.
Katie started drinking a few hours ago, and, you know, her and Rachel, it's just…
[inhales] Anyways, it's okay.
Everything's fine.
[gentle piano music playing]
[commentator] What a story that's been. Third straight quarterback
defending the National Championship.
What?
Nothing. I just… I don't need to be dealing with your sleeping ass.
-I got enough to deal with already. -I'm feeling nice. I'm not going to sleep.
[Rachel exhales]
-Don't put me with those bitches outside. -Oh, come on. Those are my sisters.
I can call them bitches, you can't.
Yeah, sure.
Those are your sisters telling you to smoke outside. This is your home.
-For real. I don't need the drama. -Okay.
Okay. Shh! Lower your voice.
Okay, but you know that's some bullshit, right?
And you know you don't need to do the shit that they say.
It's been you this whole time in this house taking care of your dad.
And suddenly, it's their place? They've been doing it?
-Get the fuck out of here. -Stop it.
Please, quiet for me. Like, you're just… You’re yelling.
All… All I'm saying is
your sister lives where?
Brooklyn?
And she comes in when?
Once a month, at best.
Not even that.
That is some bullshit.
And you know she needs to be called out on it too.
And the other one? By looking at her, you can tell she's not on this planet.
-All right. -Oh, I'm good at it.
Yes, I'm good at it.
If I could see one thing,
it's if somebody's full of shit or out of their mind.
And that ain't you.
You're not either of those things.
Look, they may act like they… they got it,
but they don't.
Okay?
You understand?
I got it.
[Katie] “After leaving the Coast Guard,
Vincent took night classes in business at BMCC
where he fell in love with a quiet, green-eyed girl sitting behind him.
She became Margaret Dyson in 1978,
and they became the loving parents to two daughters.
Margaret succumbed to breast cancer in 1994,
after a long battle with Vincent always by her side.
-Three years later-- -[door shuts]
[door opens, shuts]
Three years later, Vincent married Sarah Brodsky,
whose young daughter he raised as his own.
Sarah also preceded Vincent in death after her own battle with--”
[door opens]
[door shuts]
You know, there's enough food for the both of you
in case you want to tell Rachel and join us.
[Benjy] Okay, thanks.
Well, nice meeting you.
[Katie sighs]
[cutlery clinking]
[pages turning]
[Katie sucks teeth]
[Katie sniffles]
Oh, we met before.
It wasn't even that long ago.
Maybe a few months.
-You don't remember? -[Katie] I'm not sure.
No, no, I don't.
Um, then I guess it was the last time you were here, maybe,
because that was a while ago, right?
Actually, it was right here, right in this room.
Me and Vinnie were watching a game.
Bucks - Bulls.
We did that a lot, actually. We watched a lot of games together.
-That's nice. -It sure was.
He always made me feel at home here.
And I always looked forward to seeing him.
Sometimes, we'd not even say anything. We would just sit and watch.
Just watch.
Other times, we’d talk.
Just bullshit.
Talk about life.
Things like that.
Old people. [chuckles]
Some are like that.
I mean, not all of ‘em, but I can usually get along with ‘em.
They sometimes got this wiseness.
It's just there, or it isn't.
That's what I liked about Vincent from the jump.
I could tell the moment that he saw me,
he understood certain things that I'm not gonna say,
that I don't need to say, because I'm like that too.
[smacks lips] Sounds like you both had a good relationship.
That's great to hear.
I mean, I can figure people out too.
They don't even have to say anything.
I can get the whole deal.
Or most of it, at least.
Yeah, it's easy when someone's looking at me, but really…
looking through me.
[Katie] I'm not sure I'm following.
If you'd rather not join us…
I'm just saying there's enough food for you both.
You're welcome to take two plates with you.
[Benjy] You see?
Now I… I get what you're doing.
I mean, maybe that's obvious,
but I can see it before you even said a word
just by walking by both of you.
I think you're misunderstanding things.
[Benjy] I'm not misunderstanding shit.
Definitely not misunderstanding.
Understanding.
Even the act of offering food is… is ownership.
You ever think of that?
I think I've sat at this table more times than the two of you have for years.
He's our father.
[Benjy] Yes, but who do you think has been here?
She's not… She's not gonna stick up for herself.
I mean, Rachel, she… she can… she can handle herself,
which is one of the things I love about that girl,
but she doesn't stick up for herself.
Especially around you two. Who do you--
[Katie] We got it. Thank you. Definitely heard enough.
[Benjy] No, no, no, you did not,
because just maybe you wouldn't be acting like you've been here all this time.
Who's been taking your old man to the bathroom?
Who's…
Who's split up the… the pills
in that stupid plastic container with the days on it
just the way that I watched my mom
do the same thing for her father when he was passing?
[Katie] Okay, I'm gonna call her.
It's time for you to step out of our face.
I can smell whatever you've been drinking from here.
[Benjy] Fucking poor girl fed him.
When he stopped wanting to eat anything but apples,
who was slicing them and feeding them to him?
You don't understand a goddamn thing.
Rachel, get your fucking drunk-ass boyfriend
out of our fucking faces or whatever the fuck he is.
I don't want him here. He needs to go.
[Rachel] Come on, Benjy. Let's get the fuck out of here.
[Rachel sighs]
I want to say bye to Vincent. Is that okay? Can I say goodbye?
Sure, of course.
Are you coming in with me?
I'm gonna stay out here.
[gentle piano music playing]
[Benjy knocks]
[monitor beeping]
[door opens]
[door shuts]
[Christina breathes deeply]
[gentle piano music continues]
[monitor continues beeping]
[Christina] Oh boy.
[Rachel sobbing softly]
[Katie] Thank you. Thank you very much.
It's been so helpful having you come and watch over these hours each day.
It gives us a moment to be out of the room.
Just catch our breath, you know?
Sometimes, it gets a bit much, all packed in together.
I… I'm sorry about earlier.
Things became stressful. I guess you've seen it all.
That's no problem.
So, tomorrow 5:00 p.m.?
[Katie] Yes, um, unless something happens before then.
I'll call if so.
It feels like… I don't know.
We'll see what tomorrow is like, but I… I don't know how much longer.
He's, um… He's not doing well.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I know you have to leave.
Um, really, thank you for today.
We'll see you tomorrow, I'm sure. [sniffles]
[sighs, sniffles]
[Christina] ♪ …on her shoes ♪
♪ And I knew without asking She was into the blues ♪
♪ She wore scarlet begonias ♪
♪ Tucked into her curls ♪
♪ I knew right away She was not like other girls ♪
[lighter clicks]
[inhales]
[sighs]
[sniffles]
-[water running] -[dishes clanking]
[door shuts]
Rachel?
[items thud]
[door opens]
[door shuts]
[water running]
[Katie sighs]
[door opens]
-Can I say something? Wait one minute. -Not interested.
-[Katie] I haven't said-- -I'm not interested.
-Well, I'm trying to say-- -Okay, here's the thing, all right?
We don't have to say anything to each other. There's nothing to be said.
Just do what you have to do while you're here. After, that's it.
We'll have nothing to do with each other. We can stay out of each other's way.
[Katie] That's not practical, nor is that what's right.
Oh, well, this isn't about you.
It's not about either of us. It's about our father.
-Oh, "our father." That's funny. -Why?
You always call him “our father” when you want something from me.
Usually, you say, “My father."
-Don't be ridiculous. -What's going on here?
Well, I'm trying to apologize to her, but as you can see--
Fuck your apology, for real.
[door slams shut]
[Katie] Nice.
Nice. You slam the door when he's dying next door?
You're a fucking spoiled bitch!
[Rachel] What the fuck are you doing?
-[Christina] No! No! -[Rachel] What are you doing?
No, you have no idea. I will fucking destroy you!
-[Katie] You'll destroy me? -[Rachel] Yes!
You're a fucking punk, that's it! You're a leeching, broke-ass…
All right, Christina, you need to get this bitch out of here.
-[Katie] Bring it on! -[Christina shouting] Stop it!
Stop it!
I hate you both! You're both assholes! You're little fucking kids!
-Christina, where are you going? -[Rachel breathes heavily]
[door opens]
[door shuts]
[Christina sighs]
[Katie] Hey.
I just left his room to pack. He's doing okay.
Why did you pack?
[Katie] I think I should head home for a bit.
Uh, it's late.
I think it would do good if I leave.
If something changes, just let me know, and I'll come back.
Something is going to change. You know that.
Christina… [sighs]
…I don't know what you want of me.
Clearly, there's an issue with the three of us.
I didn't even know it was between us.
Regardless, she lives here, and you live far away.
Makes sense for me to be the one to step out.
I'm sorry, he's going to die, and you will not be here,
and you'll never forgive me.
I'm sorry. I don't want you to leave.
I want the three of us to figure something out,
some way that we can do what we can to get along, at least for now.
I thought we were just fine…
[scoffs] …you and I.
That was a surprise.
Katie, I was mad.
I got angry.
Allow me to say things, okay?
I was scared.
Hey, let's sit down.
All three of us.
We can leave his door open.
We hear if something's happening.
I don't know.
You know he's gonna die while we're talking.
Mmm, no, I don't think so.
Especially if he can hear that we're all talking together.
[monitor beeping]
[Katie] I don't think she's gonna join.
[door opens]
[keys jingling]
[door shuts, locks]
-Hey. -[Rachel] Hey.
[Christina] Katie's been working on Dad's obituary.
Okay.
[Christina] She was reading it to me earlier,
and hearing what she wrote
made me think we each have very different stories.
Who he is, who he was to each of us.
We were all raised by him, but at different times.
We had different lives, even if it was in the same home.
Both of you had moved out before I was even a teenager.
So it… it makes sense that we are different.
I am sorry for what I said earlier.
I do not hate either of you.
I do not think you are both assholes.
I was mad,
I was scared.
It was everything I did not want to happen.
I apologize.
Sure, whatever.
That wasn't the problem.
I mean, it's all good.
Uh…
No need to apologize, but apology accepted.
Yeah, it's fine, Christina. Apology accepted, of course.
I apologize you got caught between things.
[sighs]
Well--
I was trying to say sorry too earlier before things went out of hand.
Sorry for what?
Well, for one thing criticizing you about the apples being in there.
I hadn't known they were for Dad. I'm sorry. I wish I did.
And that makes all the difference?
The apples
tell you all you need to know.
It was one thing. It was a thing I assumed incorrectly.
[Rachel] Anything else?
Sure.
From the beginning, I have understood I was in your place.
[Rachel] Bullshit. It's your place too.
I know it. You know it--
But you live here. You are on the lease.
That's the second time you mentioned this lease.
What is that? What… What are you trying to say?
And you brought it up too. Outside.
So, what's up with this?
Nothing. Just the fact that when he dies, this becomes your place.
You think that's what I want? That I give a shit about the place?
[Christina] Sorry. Let's…
Let's just keep our voices down. We need to be able to hear his room.
Okay? I don't think either of us are trying to imply
anything other than what's understood.
Understood?
[Katie] Come on, Rachel. Of course you care about him.
But this place is a good deal.
Let's be truthful about it.
Nobody has rent like this in the city.
I mean, just about. It doesn't exist.
This is good.
-I'm happy for you. I want you to have it. -Well, then fuck it.
I don't want it.
Now what?
[Katie] Don't be silly. Why would you leave?
'Cause then we're done with each other, and this shit’s a wrap.
[sighs] This doesn't make any sense.
Christina, can you explain what this is about?
-I'm not sure. -Don't play fucking dumb.
-Fuck you. -Oh, okay.
-[Christina] Hey, everyone, stop. -[Rachel sighs]
[Rachel sighs]
Everything's okay.
I think
what Rachel is asking
is what connects us after he's gone?
Not us. [exhales]
I mean, you two is clear, right?
And I… I get it with you, Christina.
You live thousands of miles away.
You got your kid.
Probably gonna pop out a bunch more.
Uh, you got your life, you know? This city ain't your thing. I… I get it.
So you only care about your relationship with Katie?
Oh, fuck no.
No, you at least act like we have something more in common.
See? This is what I was trying to say.
We each have our own stories, but we don't know the other's.
We assume we do.
But maybe you just… Well… [scoffs]
Maybe before I pop out some more kids, which is fucking disgusting by the way.
-It's true. -No, nothing pops.
There's no popping. That's not the way it is.
Okay. It looks like popping to me.
Okay, well, before I choose to grow my family,
if I choose to… [inhales deeply]
…there are things I was hoping to do.
[Rachel] Oh, like what?
I mean, what could you possibly need to do?
Like, your life is perfect.
I mean, I know it, everyone knows it. You let everyone know.
Is that what you think?
Is that what you think I'm saying when I show you pictures of Mirabella
or talk about my life?
Katie?
Is that what it comes off as to you?
Well, damn it. [chuckles]
For real, damn it.
That's not at all what I meant. That… That's not what--
Wait. I… I… I'm sorry. I…
I really didn't mean to say anything to hurt you, okay? I, uh…
I guess I thought it was kind of obvious.
Like, I never hear you complain about anything.
I guess, "Mirabella won't eat her green vegetables," or something.
I mean, hey, that's just me.
Like, just forget what I said.
What was it you were hoping to do before having more kids?
[inhales deeply]
I was hoping to form a relationship with you for one thing.
Ah.
That's sweet, Christina.
That is.
I thought we had a relationship.
-No, a real one. -[Rachel] It is what it is.
Look…
Let's just forget it.
You know, we're different types of people.
You… You two, at least, you know, you share blood,
you have the same mother.
-And father. -Well, duh.
I know that.
Okay? But he's my dad too, is what I'm saying.
You know, he's my dad too, just as much as he is both of yours.
-But you also had another dad. -Who I never fucking knew.
Who died when I was four fucking years old.
But he was still your father. And when he was, Vincent was ours.
[Rachel] Here it is.
This is what this is all about.
I did not have a father
before him.
Right?
What part of that don't you understand?
He's been Daddy to me.
So that's my dad over there…
in here…
fucking dying.
You know?
It's my dad.
That is my dad, okay?
I know. I know. I'm not saying he's not. I’m just--
[Christina] Shh!
[sighs]
[Rachel sobbing]
You know, just because I don't complain doesn't mean I don't have issues.
I've been here for him.
Not this stupid place.
[sighs]
Oh my God.
[Rachel grunts, sighs]
[door opens]
[door slams shut]
[birds chirping]
-[Christina sighs] -[loud bang]
[cup thuds]
[Christina sighs]
[coffee pours]
[pot thuds]
[Katie sighs, sniffles]
I think I actually found someone to come over,
a doctor, to get that form signed.
[Christina] That's good.
-I'm sorry, you're stretching. -No, it's fine. I'm just finishing.
You want some coffee?
[Christina] Sure.
[Katie sighs]
[cup thuds]
[coffee pours]
[pot thuds]
[exhales]
The thing is getting Dad to appear with it when the doctor's here.
Yeah, that may be tricky.
He really didn't say anything to me last night.
He mumbled a few times, but nothing I understood.
Same.
You think it's wrong to give him coffee?
Okay, maybe not.
We just need one more window of clarity. That's it.
I know he has it in him.
[Christina] The coffee's good. Thank you.
[Christina breathes deeply]
I'm sorry about last night. It got out of hand.
Me too.
There's something I… I realized yesterday after we all spoke together.
It's silly.
I should've realized it years ago, but didn't for whatever reason.
That her mother died, and so did ours.
It's just something else we have in common besides Dad.
We never talked about it when it happened to her.
You were young.
Yeah. We all were.
Probably too young to talk about it in any real way.
[gentle music playing]
[knocks on door]
The doctor's here.
Can you get… [speaks gibberish] …while I… [speaks gibberish]?
You want some coffee? Just made some.
We have water and juice as well.
He's just right back here.
Um, the nurse isn't coming till three, but hopefully, we can get him up.
Dad? Dad, how are you doing?
[Christina] I'm Christina. This is our father.
[Katie] Let's, um… Let's pull the lever, so…
Let's pop… Hit the button to sit him up a little bit. Yeah.
[Christina] He’s kinda off. He was just resting.
He was saying a few words.
[gentle music continues]
[exhales]
[Katie] Here we go.
[indistinct chatter]
-[Katie] Okay. Great. -[Christina] Yeah.
[Katie] Um, I guess we just…
I wish you could've seen him, huh? [chuckles]
Couple of months ago, when he was still up and about.
That was nothing to get worked up about.
He basically just needed a pulse.
$550, in and out, 10 minutes.
Must be a nice life. But, yeah, at least it's done.
Well, tell her she has to. This is not something up for debate.
This can't be this thing where I'm the bad person,
I'm the mean mother.
Things are hard enough here.
I'm like that here. I don't get it.
I don't understand how I became that person to everyone. It's not fair.
That's not who I am. No one gives me space to be anything else.
Nothing, forget it.
Okay.
Let Tracey do whatever she wants. It's out of my hands.
Let's talk later.
[Rachel] Oh, you're just a good little baby boy.
A big boy, huh?
Slobbering around like a little big boy.
God.
This is a good dog, huh?
Does this dog… Eats like a horse, I bet.
[upbeat music playing]
[horn honks]
[doorbell chimes]
Hello.
[clears throat, sniffles]
Ah.
Yeah, that's right. You got it.
You guys should open earlier. You know that?
What is this 10:00 a.m. bullshit?
That's why this neighborhood is going to shit. Yeah.
I should open up my own bong store. Twenty-four hours, no bullshit.
Just take your shit, and get the fuck out of here, you know?
Yeah. Fucking wholesale, huh? [chuckles]
All right, man.
I'm not really gonna open it, so don't worry about that.
-[doorbell chimes] -[horn honks]
[door shuts]
[Angel] Morning.
Oh, hello.
How you doing?
[Rachel] Uh,
can't complain.
That's good. That's good.
Just came out from seeing your father.
You were able to get that DNR form signed, I see.
[Katie] Yes.
Yes, a doctor came this morning.
And he was able to sign it? I mean, he was aware of what's going on?
[Katie] Yes.
That's a surprise.
I mean, it's good.
What I was just about to tell your sisters is…
I know this is hard to hear,
but I would be very surprised if your father is conscious again.
Thankfully, he appears to be comfortable.
In terms of what happens after,
both Mirabella and I will be here as soon as we possibly can
and handle as much as we can.
But there are certain things that we won't be able to answer, though.
Exactly when you realize he's passed,
if you could try to note it, then, of course, you know,
this doesn't have to be to the second. We understand that.
Pick a minute in the timeframe when you are able.
Maybe try to decide between you all who will do what,
who will make calls, who will document.
You will need each other.
It's good that there are three of you.
It feels like you're saying this is it.
Like, we are here now.
At the end.
[Rachel] Yeah, but wasn't it yesterday?
Like, no offense, but we know he's dying. Like, we get it.
You say you can't say when,
but then you come here and say, "This is it," every day.
I don't want to speak for them,
but it is… It's wearing on me, you know?
It's a lot. There's been a lot of time to say goodbye.
Yeah, I mean, it was definitely yesterday.
-And today. -[Rachel] Yeah.
[Angel] I'm sorry if I've come off as alarmist.
That is definitely not my intention.
It's just that things have been ending.
-That's why I'm here. -[Christina] We know.
And you've been great. Trust me, we are grateful.
It was a late night.
I couldn't help it.
The dude's here every day saying he's gonna die.
It's bad enough as it is, but he's dramatic as fuck.
I know. I know.
“Uh, good morning. Your dad is gonna die."
-"May I have some coffee?” -[Katie chuckling]
What's wrong with you two?
I'm sorry. I should… I should keep my mouth closed.
No, you're right. He should switch it up just for a bit,
say he should be juggling soon just to see if we're listening. [chuckles]
[Rachel] Juggling?
Yeah, something random. Anything.
Uh, juggling? Why juggling? Dad doesn't know how to juggle.
He could do that thing where the quarter disappears.
Oh yeah!
Okay. Well…
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
“Your dad should be disappearing a quarter anytime soon.”
Yeah, I like that. That… That makes sense to me.
You're stoned. But, yeah, I agree.
Are you gonna go in there?
If you want. I'm not pushing you, but… but if you
want to be there with us or without us, I hope you'll say.
Okay, well, I'm gonna go in there.
I'll call if anything happens,
if a quarter begins to disappear.
[chuckles]
[door opens]
I'm not planning on our relationship just ending after he's gone.
[exhales]
What relationship is that?
Well, what do you want it to be?
[chuckles softly]
[sighs]
[TV playing indistinctly]
No, you pick up the phone.
Tracey!
[breathes deeply]
[commentator 1] …works so much. Jimmie Hunt tackled by Tim Bennett.
[Katie] This is what happens.
[commentator 1] Bennett recovering a fumble.
[Katie] I don't care that you were at lunch.
[commentator 2] …extremely physical corner has no…
[Katie] Tracey?
…those are the kind of corners that I like to see,
ones that have no problem coming up and making a hit in the backfield…
[Katie] I can't.
Tracey?
[Rachel sighs]
-…these defensive backs-- -[TV turns off]
Tracey, listen to me.
I need you to stop and hear me.
Do not do that.
-Tracey, I'm asking you to not-- -[door opens]
-Tracey! -[door shuts, locks]
[groans]
Are you sure you don't want half at least?
[Christina] No, I'm really not hungry.
[glass clatters]
I know it's weird, but it says to do that.
Yeah, it's fine.
[Katie] Really? I can't make you anything?
-I'm hungry all the time here. -Really?
Want a break? I can sit with him if you'd like.
I'm fine. Do you want to be in there with him?
‘Cause we can be in there together. It's fine. I'm just… I'm reading to him.
No, it's fine. There's things I can do.
[Katie sighs]
Do you know where Rachel went to?
[Christina] Mm-mm.
[items clatter]
[exhales]
[items continues clattering]
[sink water runs]
[Christina breathes deeply]
[knocking on door]
[Katie] Christina?
[knocking on door]
Christina?
Hey.
Oh.
-Oh, you're over there. -[Christina] Yeah.
I was just taking a moment. What's up?
Nothing. Take the moment. Everything is fine.
[Katie sighs]
-[Christina breathes deeply] -[door opens]
[door shuts]
-He's gone? -No.
No, we would've called if something like that happened.
I don't know.
It's just weird, you sitting there.
-Katie made food if you want. -[Rachel] Yeah.
Shit feels pretty weird in here.
I'm just taking a moment before going back to Dad.
[Rachel] Okay.
Yeah.
I should go check scores. I have a 16 parlay going.
Uh, shit ain't gonna hit, but…
who knows.
[bag crinkling]
Are you okay?
[Christina] I'm fine.
[Rachel] Okay.
[bag continues crinkling]
Here. Here, take this.
Thank you.
Yeah, no worries.
[breathes deeply]
[monitor beeping faintly]
Hey, Pop.
Uh, we got, uh…
the Clippers at +125,
Bills -200,
Titans -145,
Vikings -900,
Mets -115,
and, uh, Eagles -220.
So…
20 bucks to make 724 and some change.
It's crazy, right? [chuckles softly]
[monitor continues beeping]
Yeah.
[Katie sighs]
Good to see you. Come in.
[door shuts, locks]
How is he? How's your father?
He's… He's still with us, hanging in there. [chuckles]
Do you want some food? I made soup.
Uh, no? How about some coffee?
[nurse] Okay. [chuckles]
Well, just let me know if you change your mind.
I made way too much.
You are going in the bath now? Yes, with Ducky? Who else?
[gasps]
Bubbles?
What a good daddy.
Splash some water for me too, okay?
[chuckles]
H… Hey.
Hey.
You're in the middle of things.
No, nothing. Nothing. Everything's fine.
I just… just want to say hi, just homesick.
-[exhaling] -[Christina] Will do. Thanks.
[male voice] Settle back…
[Christina exhales slowly]
Be aware of your sitting posture.
Remember that the foundation of meditation
-is just to sit and know that you're safe. -[exhales slowly]
All other aspects of the…
[lighter clicks]
[monitor beeping fades]
[train clacking]
[door opens, shuts]
How you doing, Rachel?
Doing okay.
How's Dad doing?
[Rachel] Hanging in.
Still there.
[Victor] That's good.
Yep.
Well, you know what I'm… I'm supposed to be telling you, right?
About smoking out here.
Well, let's just say that I did, okay?
Yep, yep.
Thanks.
[inhales]
[sucks teeth]
[Christina breathing deeply]
How many times a day do you do that?
[Christina] Just when I can.
I usually don't have the time, but it helps.
Do you want to join me?
Thanks.
Maybe I'll start when the kids are older, out of the house.
[Christina continues breathing deeply]
I'm struggling with writing this.
[Christina] I think you should ask Rachel.
Really?
[knocking on door]
[cheering on TV]
Are you busy?
I'm working on this thing, his obituary. I was hoping that you could help with it.
I don't know anything about making those things.
Me neither. [chuckles]
Vincent was proud to work for
the Department of Citywide Administrative Services.
After 32 years, he retired as a senior supervisor,
beloved by his colleagues.
Vincent will be remembered for his dedication to his family and friends,
his welcoming spirit, warm wit,
and an unwavering love for the Jets.
That's it?
So far.
And I know it all sounds so… dry,
but I'm not sure how to sum up his life in just a few words.
It seems like a pretty good job so far.
Uh, I don't know who reads those things. I don't.
Uh, if you knew the person, you knew the person.
[Katie] It's more a record, just to have,
like saying, "This person existed, in case anyone wants to know."
[Rachel] I… I… I'm gonna put money
that you could write anything, and no one's gonna notice, all right?
Married a couple of crazy bitches,
raised a few crazy bitches.
[Katie] Thanks.
Okay, serious, right?
Vincent, uh…
loved the Jets.
Yeah, got that.
[Rachel] Um, he loves laughing at, uh, stupid shit.
Uh, he likes old movies,
listens to records.
Uh…
He, uh…
He calls… He calls on, uh,
the news radio sometimes and gets into it with them.
Uh, he gets crazy mad, starts yelling about things,
then forgets about what.
He doesn't give a fuck about a lot of things
you shouldn't give a fuck about.
"Doesn't give a fuck about a lot of things you shouldn't."
Well, that's true.
-[scoffs] Everything I said is true. -[Katie] I know.
And it's more interesting than what I wrote.
But in the end, it's a list too.
Ah, I tried.
One day, this is after Sarah passed,
and, Katie, you just left for college or it's the summer before,
but you… you weren't in the city, and, Rachel, you had…
You were spending a lot of nights out, so it wasn't that uncommon
for Dad and I to find ourselves in the home alone together at night.
I didn't need much help with schoolwork,
and, you know, he was still mourning,
but we'd watch a film together sometimes
after dinner or a TV show.
And this is a time I still think about a lot.
It was… It was calm.
Well, one night, he got really upset at what we were watching.
I don't know what it was other than that someone was dying in it,
and he wanted to explain to me
that the death we were watching in the film
had no relationship to how it was in life,
that books, and movies,
and everything that tried to show death got it wrong.
That the act itself of putting it into images,
into words, is where it all went wrong.
It was a big lie. Like the thing we were watching that… that…
Oh, I can remember that.
"The only way to sum up a person's life,
the only way to put things in perspective,
what they did, who they were, how they loved, and were--"
-[Katie] What's wrong? -No, no. He's sleeping.
It's just time for me to leave.
That was crazy.
Oh my God, I thought something happened.
Me too.
-This is crazy. -[sighs]
I mean, we were all just on edge. It feels so wrong.
-[Christina] I'll go see her off. -[Katie sighs]
What? No. Wa… Wait a second.
Don't leave us hanging like that. You were gonna…
Tell us what Dad said about dying.
Right.
Just that the only way to communicate how death truly feels
is through absence.
Everything else is fantasy.
[Christina sighs] Okay.
So, basically…
don't write anything.
I think what Dad was saying is that
we won't really know who he was till after.
But I think I know who people are when they're still living, right?
Yeah.
Kinda. Uh, well,
who they are right now.
I, uh…
[door opens]
It's none of my business, but…
I hear you going at it with Tracey, but it's just, you know…
-[door shuts] -…who she is right now as a teenager.
You know that.
I think what Pops meant
was
the whole thing.
Like, all of it, you know?
All the different times, different people we can be,
you know, for it all.
Yeah.
It's easy to forget with Tracey.
It feels like she'll be like this forever.
[Rachel] No.
She'll still be spoiled when she's older,
but a different kind of spoiled.
I'm playing.
Yes, I know.
I'm sorry I wasn't here more to help you.
I know it was a lot.
[Rachel] It's fine.
I liked it.
But thanks.
And I hope you don't leave this place.
Why?
Because I want to keep the apartment in the family.
Do you want to go in there together right now?
-Come on, let's do it. -[Katie sniffles]
[monitor beeping]
[Katie] Look who's here. [chuckles]
-[Rachel] Hi. -[women chuckle]
-Daddy, hi, it's me. -[Katie chuckles]
[Vincent] Up.
[Katie] What's that, Daddy?
I don't understand. You want me to move you?
Will you say it again?
[Rachel] I… I think Dad wants to sit up.
-[Katie] Really? -[Christina] Dad?
-[Katie] Watch the painting! -[Rachel] Okay.
-[Katie] Oh my God. -[Rachel] Guys…
-[Katie] Guys, is this a good idea? -[Rachel] Go slow.
[Katie] Okay. Be careful, please.
-Watch his feet. -[Christina] Follow me.
-[Katie] Watch. -[Rachel] Here you go, Dad.
-[Katie] Keep him straight. -[Rachel] Okay. Okay.
-[Katie] Okay. -[Rachel] We're doing it.
[Katie] Oh.
[Rachel chuckles]
Okay. All right.
I think he wants to sit in his chair.
In? Is that wise? What if we need to move him suddenly?
Where?
-[Rachel sighs] Uh, okay. Okay. -[Katie] Okay. Fine.
-Here. -[Christina] Oh yeah, get the other chair.
[Katie] Ooh.
-[Rachel] Yeah? -[Katie] Yeah, got it.
[Christina] Move the monitor over here.
-[Rachel] Okay. -[Katie] Okay, wait.
Uh, feet. I'm gonna lift your feet, Dad, okay?
-[Christina] Lock it. Lock it. -[Katie] Okay. Yeah, lock it.
[gentle piano music playing]
[Christina] One, two, three.
[indistinct chatter]
[Rachel grunts]
-[indistinct chatter continues] -[gentle piano music continues]
[Christina] Yeah, I'll plug it in the back.
[Rachel] Boom. Okay, here.
-[Christina] Yeah. Thank you. -[exhales]
-[Christina] Oh, watch it. -[indistinct chatter]
-[Katie] Got it? -[Rachel] Yeah.
-[Christina] It's plugged in. -Okay.
[Christina] Oxygen's flowing.
[Katie] Okay. [chuckles]
[Christina] Yeah. [chuckles]
[exhales]
-[exhales] -[girls chuckle]
[all chuckling]
[Katie] What do we do? I don't think he's supposed to eat.
We'll just hang out. We can watch a movie or a game or something.
[Christina] Yeah, uh…
[Rachel] Titans blew, uh, our parlay,
but, uh, we can still catch the… the Bills if you want.
[Christina chuckles]
Uh, you want that?
-[Katie] Turn him around. -[Christina] Yeah.
[all laughing]
[indistinct chatter]
-[Katie] Okay. -[Rachel] Okay, okay.
-Hey. -[all chuckling]
[Katie] That was terrible. [chuckles]
Oh, Daddy.
[Christina kisses]
[monitor continues beeping]
[Katie chuckles]
[grunts] Everyone, please, just…
-[monitor continues beeping] -[Vincent sighs]
-This sound is… -[Katie] Uh, Dad….
-Wait, you can't! -[Vincent groans]
[exhales]
[all scream]
[Vincent breathing heavily]
[exhales]
-[Katie] No, no, no. -No, no, no. I…
No. Let me do it.
[exhales]
This… I still have
more left in me.
[inhales]
[continues breathing heavily]
[Victor exhales]
-[fridge door opens] -[bottles clank]
[fridge door closes]
-[Victor exhales] -[bottle cap clanking]
[Victor exhales]
[exhales]
Okay, enough of the shocked looks.
I've been in bed for long enough.
Oh.
Uh…
And… And I thank you for trying, but…
No.
Rachel's your sister.
She is my daughter.
I didn't raise her like my own.
She is my own.
If blood had an influence on her,
she would have had a very different father.
You would have had a dad like my dad.
My dad was a fucking jerk.
Well, you know that.
We were related, but…
he was no father.
You have no idea how much
Rachel cares about you,
how much you mean to her.
When you went away to college, you moved out,
I've never seen her so sad.
Well, only when her mother got sick and left us.
I kept waiting for the day
when you both would realize why you fight so much.
How similar you are.
I want you all to try when I'm gone.
I know that a better relationship is possible.
You will be connected after I'm gone,
even more so because of it.
I just know it.
Christina.
Christina,
I know you didn't have it right.
I heard what you said about that time when we watched movies together.
[inhales] Um,
that was the only time I never gave it to you.
No one else really did either.
I can't tell you how sorry I am.
You just… Well, you just…
From the moment that you could walk,
you didn't seem to need anyone.
You could be left alone.
And then, when your mom passed, you seemed okay, too.
And I should have realized that's not possible,
that you were hurting just as much,
but I was in so much pain, I couldn't see.
And then I fell in love again. And then I…
[panting]
Eh…
That girl of yours will not be left wanting.
I watch you and that love of yours for her, for David,
for whoever's gonna join you next if you choose to have more,
and I thank you.
I thank you for doing better than me,
for doing more.
[exhales]
Damn, I love this city.
[exhales]
I marvel at it.
Like the roaches and the weeds, somehow, we keep making it through.
I sure will miss the ghosts
and memories I have on every block.
I guess I'll be one soon enough.
There was one other real true love besides your mother's.
This love happened when I was very young.
The summer I went into the Coast Guard.
Her name was Bliss.
I know, but it's not so uncommon in Ireland,
and she was Irish,
from Queens.
And like all of you,
like your mothers,
she could handle herself.
But I had never met anyone like Bliss before.
She was interested in more things
than anyone I've ever met until then,
maybe since then.
She found life,
the world, people, interesting.
And it was intoxicating to be around.
I couldn't… I couldn't get enough.
I wanted to see like her.
I aimed to see like her.
And then I went away.
And by the time I got out,
my letters had stopped,
and the way life can, things just drifted apart.
In fact, we didn't see or run into each other again.
Except for one time.
Each in our own group, passing each other on the street.
It was so brief.
[exhales]
When I grabbed her arm and said, “Hello,”
she said, “You still remember me?”
I said, "Of course.”
"You… You changed my life.”
That made her smile.
But if there was any guilt I have,
it's that maybe I should have…
I could have expressed myself better.
[breathes deeply]
There was no big lesson there.
I…
We know each will die with at least one regret.
But I…
It's just, uh, love that I want you to know about.
Something that fundamentally changed me.
-[monitor beeps] -[Katie] Dad?
Made me
who I am.
[Rachel] Daddy.
-[Katie] Dad. -[Rachel] Daddy.
-[Katie] Dad? -[Rachel] Dad?
-Who, uh… -[Katie, Rachel] Dad!
I…
-[Rachel] Dad. -[Katie] No, no, no. [sobbing]
-Dad. -[Rachel] Daddy. Daddy. Dad.
Dad!
-[monitor alarm beeping] -[all sobbing]
[beeping halts abruptly]
[Christina inhales] Mmm.
[inhales deeply]
[exhales]
[Christina sniffles]
[exhales]
[Christina exhales]
[Christina sniffles, exhales]
[Christina exhales]
[exhales]
[inhales sharply]
Dad is gone.
[inhales]
[exhales]
[exhales, sniffles]
[Katie exhales]
[Katie breathes sharply]
[exhales]
♪ Five little ducks went out one day ♪
♪ Over the hill and far away ♪
♪ Mother duck said Quack, quack, quack, quack ♪
♪ But only four little ducks came back ♪
[faint bubbling]
[birds chirping]
[bag unzips]
♪ Four little ducks went out one day ♪
♪ Over the hill and far away ♪
♪ Mother duck said Quack, quack, quack, quack ♪
♪ But only three little ducks came back ♪
♪ Three little ducks went out one day ♪
♪ Over the hill and far away ♪
♪ Mother duck said Quack, quack, quack, quack ♪
♪ But only two little ducks came back ♪
-♪ Two little ducks went out one day ♪ -[rapid tapping]
-♪ Over the hill and far away ♪ -[indistinct commentary on TV]
♪ Mother duck said Quack, quack, quack, quack ♪
-♪ But only one little duck came back ♪ -[TV turns off]
[lighter clicks]
[exhales]
[lighter clicks]
♪ One little duck went out one day ♪
♪ Over the hill and far away ♪
♪ Mother duck said Quack, quack, quack, quack ♪
-♪ But none of the five little ducks… ♪ -[door opens]
-♪…came back ♪ -[door shuts]
[Victor] How you doing, Rach?
I heard the news.
I… I'm sorry.
You hanging in there okay?
Yeah.
I'm doing okay.
Thanks, Victor.
[sniffles, exhales]
[Christina] ♪ Sad mother duck Went out one day ♪
♪ Over the hill and far away ♪
[Rachel] ♪ Daddy duck said Beep, beep, beep ♪
♪ Beep! ♪
[Katie laughs]
[Katie] And all those crazy little ducks came back. [continues laughing]
["In Time" by Rodrigo Amarante playing]
[humming]
♪ Be a friend of mine Stay away a while ♪
♪ Be a friend of mine And let the silence ring ♪
♪ Be away a while Till the kingdom comes ♪
♪ Be a friend of mine, in time ♪
♪ In time ♪
[humming]
♪ If we don't know by now What we should by heart ♪
♪ How to be around And how to be apart ♪
♪ It ain't spelling why For the reason how ♪
♪ If we don't know by now, then in time ♪
♪ In time ♪
[humming]
♪ Oh ♪
[humming]
♪ I'll learn how to stay When you learn to leave ♪
♪ So won't you dance the wind While I bend the storm ♪
♪ Won't you dance the wind And stay away a while ♪
♪ Be a friend to me And let the silence ring ♪
♪ Be a friend to me And sing away the night ♪
♪ Be a friend of mine, in time ♪
♪ In time ♪
[music fades]
[birds chirping]
[train rattling]
[man speaking indistinctly]
[train rattling]