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[soft piano music playing]
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00:00:46,611 --> 00:00:48,961
[Daniel] In Herman Williams'
seminal work on the joys
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00:00:48,961 --> 00:00:53,357
of being a model train
hobbyist, he writes,
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00:00:53,357 --> 00:00:55,403
"Many an hour have I spent
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00:00:55,403 --> 00:00:59,189
"blissfully lost in a world
of my own creation.
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00:01:00,756 --> 00:01:03,063
"For the model train enthusiast,
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00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:07,676
"there exists a secret world
of order and symmetry.
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00:01:07,676 --> 00:01:11,506
"Nestled into the corners
of our basements and attics,
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"we lord over a world
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"where the hobbyist
plays omnipotent creator.
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"There, in 1:87 scale,
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"the neighbors
are always kind,
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"the lovers
always end up together,
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"and the trains always
take you to the far-off places
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00:01:31,613 --> 00:01:34,094
"you always swore you'd go."
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In life, of course,
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00:01:38,010 --> 00:01:42,450
nothing is nearly
as neat and tidy.
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[woman singing]
♪ Well, if you close the door ♪
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[piano music playing]
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♪ The night could
last forever ♪
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♪ And keep the sunshine out ♪
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♪ And say hello to never ♪
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♪ 'Cause all the people
are dancing ♪
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♪ And they're having such fun ♪
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00:02:04,863 --> 00:02:09,781
♪ I wish it could
happen to me ♪
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- [piano music pauses]
- [cheering, laughing]
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- ♪ So baby close that door ♪
- [piano music resumes]
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♪ And never have to see
the day again ♪
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♪ Oh, yeah ♪
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♪ I'd never have to see
the day again ♪
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♪ That's right ♪
Sing!
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♪ I'd never have to see
the day again ♪
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[all whooping and cheering]
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- [plays glissando]
- Encore, Allie!
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- No!
- [others groan]
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I am way too drunk
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to be singing
in front of people.
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Aw, but we love you! Come on!
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And I wanna keep it that way.
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Um, okay. That was
for my beautiful, sweet,
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darling fiance, Nathan.
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[laughter]
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Who loves that song very much.
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Bubba, you wanna come up here?
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- No. [chuckles]
- [all laughing]
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[Allison] Come on!
It's our engagement party.
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He's very shy!
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[all chanting]
Nathan! Nathan! Nathan!
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Nathan! Nathan! Nathan! Nathan!
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[whooping]
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[guests] Mm! Ah! Mm!
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- Did you like it?
- It was amazing.
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[Nathan inhales deeply]
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- Hey, y'all...
- [laughter]
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Um, I'll just briefly say that
she played that song for me
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on our very first date
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on a beautiful,
old piano she found
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at the back of an empty bar.
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- Well, you better go, girl!
- Come on. Come on!
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- Always be closing.
- [Molly] Absolutely!
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Welcome to the family!
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- Allison... [chuckles]
- Yes... [chuckles]
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Every memory I cherish
in my life has you in it.
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Some of them
are just tiny seconds.
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The way you close one eye
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when you really wanna focus
on tasting something.
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- [guests laugh]
- I do that. I do that.
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I go, like...
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[guests laughing]
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[laughing]
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I can't believe this is real.
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It's real, baby.
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- Thank God.
- [Allison] Mm.
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- I love you.
- I love you.
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[all] Aw.
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- Okay.
- Hey...
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- Um... Drink, smoke, be merry.
- [man] Yeah.
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And if you choose
to sleep with Chip,
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make sure he wears,
like, 11 condoms.
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[all exclaiming]
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I'm, like, literally a virgin.
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- [others laughing]
- He's kidding. He's kidding.
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- ["Time" playing]
- ♪ Time keeps on coming ♪
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♪ I've been all around ♪
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[lighter clicking]
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♪ I'll keep on loving... ♪
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No! No, no, no.
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- No. Come on, baby. No phone.
- Oh.
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When we get married,
we have to make rules
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- about phones in the bed.
- [scoffs]
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Oh, shut up.
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You are on your phone,
like, ten times more than me,
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looking up rusty old trucks.
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Uh, a '67 cloth top Bronco
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is a work of art, baby.
It's not a truck.
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- I'm looking at art.
- Yeah. Oh.
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- Like this butt.
- [Allison laughing]
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I am so high
from that gummy you gave me.
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- What the fuck was that?
- [Nathan chuckling]
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I still can't feel my ankles.
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You don't need your ankles
right now.
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Yeah, but I would
still like to feel my ankles.
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Hey, come kiss me.
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- Hey, babe?
- Yeah?
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This creepy doctor
from my sales list
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is really trying to flirt
with me on Instagram.
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[inhales sharply] Maybe you
gave him the wrong impression.
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What?
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Come on! As if!
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I go in there, and I'm, like,
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waving
my engagement ring around.
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You always say, "Flirting
is a part of the job."
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Someone's bound to get
the wrong impression.
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It's very light flirting.
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- Ah, okay. [laughs]
- It is!
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It's like... It's just...
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It's sushi with a smile,
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so that he can write
the fucking prescription,
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and I can get a fat bonus,
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and then
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you and I can maybe one day
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move to the city.
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If we don't go to hell first.
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Oh! Why would you say that?
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- Come on!
- I'm sorry.
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I'm only pushing HUMIRA, like,
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I won't go to hell for
moderate to severe psoriasis.
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Come on.
That would be so unfair.
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Yeah, yeah.
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Shut up.
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- Okay. Hey.
- Mmm.
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It's just a stepping
stone, baby.
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I know.
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Do you think it's too late
for astronaut school?
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- [laughing]
- What?
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- What?
- Nothing.
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I could be
a professional dancer.
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- Oh, word?
- Yeah. Yeah.
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- You got them moves?
- Ooh.
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- [laughs]
- Wait, let me stand up.
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I'm way better
when I stand up.
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- Okay.
- It's so much better
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when I stand up.
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- Are you ready?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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- Whoa.
- What genre is this?
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I don't know,
but my body just goes...
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[Nathan] Go.
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Is this modern, right?
[laughs]
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- This is professional.
- Wow.
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So I would appreciate it
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if you took me seriously
right now.
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I'm taking you very seriously.
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And then, we'll finish
with something like this.
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- [Allison humming]
- [laughs]
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But I'm not gonna
show you anymore,
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because it's
a work-in-progress.
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And the professional is tired,
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and I wanna cuddle.
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♪ Came into this life
on my own ♪
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♪And I'll try
Yes I'll try ♪
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♪ Hope for love
turn out the light ♪
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♪ And I gave my own life
My own life, my own life ♪
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[truck horn blaring]
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[Allison]
Oh, calm the fuck down.
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I swear, this road has been
under construction
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my entire life.
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When will New Jersey be done?
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- She's a work-in-progress.
- Never.
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[chuckles] Oh, by the way,
how's Ryan doing?
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Oh, you mean
your future niece?
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[gasps] Oh, my goodness.
She's so pretty!
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Yeah, the varsity coach said
she might start next year.
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00:08:01,306 --> 00:08:02,394
- Oh, yeah?
- [Jesse] Mmm-hmm.
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00:08:02,394 --> 00:08:04,701
She scored 19 goals
last season!
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00:08:04,701 --> 00:08:05,963
- Tell her. Tell her.
- Wow!
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Oh, my God.
You must be so proud of her.
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I can't believe
I haven't met her.
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I'm so sorry Nathan and I
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00:08:10,707 --> 00:08:12,056
haven't made it
down there yet.
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Don't worry about it.
I mean, it's far.
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00:08:13,536 --> 00:08:14,755
We're gonna try to come up
more often
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now that our dad's
getting older.
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00:08:16,060 --> 00:08:17,845
[Allison] Yeah.
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Well, I've only met
your dad a few times,
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00:08:21,239 --> 00:08:23,546
but that we can't blame
on distance. [chuckles]
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This is fucking nuts.
I'm sorry.
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Wait, so tell us about
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00:08:28,638 --> 00:08:30,335
these wedding dresses
we're seeing.
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00:08:30,335 --> 00:08:32,076
Yes, please. I couldn't sleep
last night thinking about it.
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- [laughs] Shut up!
- You are such a good sport.
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00:08:34,426 --> 00:08:37,212
No, he isn't. He just thinks
that after we see dresses,
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- we're going to go...
- Yeah?
193
00:08:38,561 --> 00:08:39,736
- ...on a pub crawl.
- [Jesse] Mmm-hmm.
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00:08:39,736 --> 00:08:41,172
But actually
we're going to see a play.
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00:08:41,172 --> 00:08:42,609
- You are?
- No, we're not.
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00:08:42,609 --> 00:08:44,175
You said that we'd have
to get tickets already.
197
00:08:44,175 --> 00:08:46,221
No. We just gotta see some
shit nobody else wants to see.
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00:08:46,221 --> 00:08:47,614
- [laughing]
- Oh, great. That's awesome.
199
00:08:47,614 --> 00:08:49,006
- Yeah, right?
- Great. Great.
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Hey, look,
it's finally opening up.
201
00:08:51,008 --> 00:08:53,445
All right, so I think
it might be a little tight
202
00:08:53,445 --> 00:08:54,969
getting you to a play,
203
00:08:54,969 --> 00:08:58,494
but, um, let me just check...
204
00:09:01,366 --> 00:09:02,977
- Okay, so now it's saying...
- [back-up alarm bleeping]
205
00:09:02,977 --> 00:09:04,239
Allie!
206
00:09:04,239 --> 00:09:05,414
- [Jesse] Look out!
- [tires screech]
207
00:09:19,254 --> 00:09:20,647
[device chimes]
208
00:09:20,647 --> 00:09:22,126
Here we are.
209
00:09:22,126 --> 00:09:24,520
You got me here so early.
210
00:09:24,520 --> 00:09:26,653
Yeah, well, it's
211
00:09:26,653 --> 00:09:29,090
better to be a half-hour early
212
00:09:29,090 --> 00:09:30,657
than one minute late.
213
00:09:30,657 --> 00:09:32,484
[chuckles]
214
00:09:32,484 --> 00:09:34,530
Grandpa, have you ever played
any video games?
215
00:09:34,530 --> 00:09:36,314
- No. [scoffs]
- [chuckles]
216
00:09:37,664 --> 00:09:39,927
You've got that perfect
little brain up there
217
00:09:39,927 --> 00:09:42,538
and you're just melting it
away with that crap.
218
00:09:43,017 --> 00:09:44,584
Okay.
219
00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:45,802
- [automated voice] Nathan.
- [cell phone ringing]
220
00:09:45,802 --> 00:09:47,021
[Ryan] It's Uncle Nathan.
Answer it.
221
00:09:47,891 --> 00:09:49,371
Why would he be calling me?
222
00:09:50,764 --> 00:09:51,808
Pick it up.
223
00:09:56,421 --> 00:09:59,599
[sighs] Thought we weren't
talking anymore.
224
00:09:59,599 --> 00:10:01,601
[video game sound effects
playing]
225
00:10:10,740 --> 00:10:13,787
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Nathan. Nathan.
226
00:10:13,787 --> 00:10:16,267
I've... I've got
Ryan here in the car.
227
00:10:16,267 --> 00:10:18,052
I'm just dropping her off
at school.
228
00:10:18,052 --> 00:10:19,401
I'll call you right back.
229
00:10:21,708 --> 00:10:24,928
Yes, I heard what you said.
I'm headed right there.
230
00:10:24,928 --> 00:10:26,843
I just gotta
drop her off, okay?
231
00:10:29,629 --> 00:10:31,935
See, that wasn't so bad.
232
00:10:31,935 --> 00:10:34,416
Mom says she wishes you guys
could find a way to get along.
233
00:10:35,809 --> 00:10:38,028
I... I've...
I've got to leave, sweetie.
234
00:10:38,028 --> 00:10:40,117
But I look like a dork
being here this early.
235
00:10:40,117 --> 00:10:41,553
I'm sorry.
236
00:10:42,467 --> 00:10:43,468
I'll, uh...
237
00:10:44,295 --> 00:10:46,254
I'll be picking you up today.
238
00:10:46,254 --> 00:10:47,777
Why can't Mom?
239
00:10:47,777 --> 00:10:49,170
She said they'd be back
from the city today, right?
240
00:10:50,388 --> 00:10:51,520
Well...
241
00:10:53,565 --> 00:10:55,132
- she can't.
- [sighing] Okay.
242
00:10:55,132 --> 00:10:56,307
I'll text her.
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00:10:56,307 --> 00:10:57,613
[Daniel] Okay.
244
00:10:57,613 --> 00:10:59,093
Okay. Bye.
245
00:10:59,920 --> 00:11:01,269
Tell me you love me.
246
00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:04,620
I love you, Grandpa.
247
00:11:04,620 --> 00:11:06,056
I love you too.
248
00:11:06,056 --> 00:11:07,405
[chuckles]
249
00:11:08,711 --> 00:11:10,104
- Bye.
- Bye.
250
00:11:11,540 --> 00:11:13,542
[somber music playing]
251
00:11:16,197 --> 00:11:17,154
[car door closes]
252
00:11:23,030 --> 00:11:24,031
[sighs]
253
00:11:29,079 --> 00:11:31,473
[machine beeping]
254
00:11:31,473 --> 00:11:34,476
[Allison weakly] Mom,
my head hurts so much.
255
00:11:34,476 --> 00:11:37,871
I can't even explain
how much pain my head's in.
256
00:11:37,871 --> 00:11:39,394
[Diane] Can you click
on the morphine again?
257
00:11:39,394 --> 00:11:40,830
I've been clicking on it.
258
00:11:40,830 --> 00:11:43,006
I'm clicking on it,
and nothing is happening.
259
00:11:43,006 --> 00:11:44,312
Oh, shoot, you're right.
It is empty.
260
00:11:44,312 --> 00:11:45,661
We gotta get more.
261
00:11:45,661 --> 00:11:46,967
We'll have to get the nurse
to get us more.
262
00:11:46,967 --> 00:11:48,185
Nathan, why are you
looking at me like that?
263
00:11:48,664 --> 00:11:50,361
Like what?
264
00:11:50,361 --> 00:11:52,320
Is it bad? Do I look that bad?
265
00:11:52,320 --> 00:11:53,669
No, he's just upset, sweetheart.
266
00:11:53,669 --> 00:11:55,149
He's upset 'cause we've been
267
00:11:55,149 --> 00:11:56,628
- so worried all night long.
- [Allison] Okay. Okay.
268
00:11:56,628 --> 00:11:58,718
This backhoe thing
just reversed
269
00:11:58,718 --> 00:12:00,589
into the middle of the street.
270
00:12:00,589 --> 00:12:01,721
[Diane] I know, I know.
271
00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:03,374
[Allison] I didn't know
what to do.
272
00:12:03,374 --> 00:12:04,636
I know, but you don't have to
worry about that right now.
273
00:12:04,636 --> 00:12:06,160
- Right, Nathan?
- Yeah.
274
00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:07,683
No, you just need to focus
on getting better.
275
00:12:07,683 --> 00:12:08,771
That's all you need
to think about, okay?
276
00:12:08,771 --> 00:12:10,425
- [Allison] Okay.
- Right, Nathan?
277
00:12:10,425 --> 00:12:12,079
- Yeah.
- [Nurse] Sorry to interrupt,
278
00:12:12,079 --> 00:12:13,733
but the police are here
to collect a blood sample.
279
00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:15,082
Oh, no. Absolutely not.
280
00:12:15,082 --> 00:12:16,736
Now is not a good time.
She is in a lot of pain.
281
00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:18,302
- You have to come back.
- No.
282
00:12:18,302 --> 00:12:20,087
- [Nathan] She just woke up.
- Why are the police here?
283
00:12:20,087 --> 00:12:21,697
Unfortunately, I can't.
284
00:12:21,697 --> 00:12:24,047
Legally, the sample has to be
drawn as soon as possible.
285
00:12:24,047 --> 00:12:25,483
We waited for her
to stabilize,
286
00:12:25,483 --> 00:12:26,571
but with an accident
like this,
287
00:12:26,571 --> 00:12:27,964
it's imperative we test...
288
00:12:27,964 --> 00:12:29,705
What is he talking about?
It wasn't my fault.
289
00:12:29,705 --> 00:12:32,012
- Officer, she doesn't know.
- It wasn't her fault.
290
00:12:32,012 --> 00:12:33,317
With an accident
of this magnitude
291
00:12:33,317 --> 00:12:34,754
involving fatalities,
we're required...
292
00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:36,494
- She hasn't been told.
- Fatalities?
293
00:12:36,494 --> 00:12:37,800
She hasn't been told,
294
00:12:37,800 --> 00:12:39,193
- you fucking asshole!
- [whispers] Fuck.
295
00:12:39,193 --> 00:12:41,064
- [Diane] She didn't know.
- Mama, what's going on?
296
00:12:41,064 --> 00:12:42,326
- I'm so sorry, honey.
- What is he talking about?
297
00:12:42,326 --> 00:12:43,458
I'm so sorry.
298
00:12:43,458 --> 00:12:45,199
[Allison] Nathan?
299
00:12:45,199 --> 00:12:46,809
Nathan, what's going on?
300
00:12:50,682 --> 00:12:51,945
They're gone.
301
00:12:54,121 --> 00:12:55,600
They're both gone.
302
00:12:56,123 --> 00:12:57,211
Who's gone?
303
00:12:57,211 --> 00:12:58,429
[Diane] Honey...
304
00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:04,871
[melancholy music playing]
305
00:13:14,054 --> 00:13:16,621
[sighs] No, Mom.
306
00:13:17,361 --> 00:13:18,885
[gasping]
307
00:13:18,885 --> 00:13:20,843
[voice breaking] Why, Mom?
308
00:13:20,843 --> 00:13:22,932
[Diane] I'm so sorry, honey.
309
00:13:31,027 --> 00:13:33,377
[melancholy music continues]
310
00:13:44,998 --> 00:13:47,261
["Wake Up With The Sun"
playing]
311
00:13:51,787 --> 00:13:54,572
♪ Wake up with
the sun in morning ♪
312
00:13:54,572 --> 00:13:57,488
♪ Go to sleep with
the moon at night... ♪
313
00:13:57,488 --> 00:13:58,968
[on speaker]
Hey, guys! Bella here.
314
00:13:58,968 --> 00:14:00,448
Welcome to my bathroom!
315
00:14:00,448 --> 00:14:03,407
Today, we're gonna learn
to cut our own hair.
316
00:14:03,407 --> 00:14:04,844
So let's jump in.
317
00:14:04,844 --> 00:14:08,195
To get started,
we grab this first front layer
318
00:14:08,935 --> 00:14:10,414
just like this.
319
00:14:10,414 --> 00:14:13,940
And put your scissors
at, like, a slight angle.
320
00:14:15,724 --> 00:14:18,727
Okay, it's now or never.
[chuckles]
321
00:14:18,727 --> 00:14:20,076
Go for it!
322
00:14:20,076 --> 00:14:21,991
♪ What their purpose
is on earth ♪
323
00:14:21,991 --> 00:14:24,776
♪ To love and be
loved in return... ♪
324
00:14:24,776 --> 00:14:25,865
Fuck.
325
00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:27,257
[Bella] You nailed it!
326
00:14:27,257 --> 00:14:29,738
You're officially a stylist
just like me!
327
00:14:29,738 --> 00:14:31,131
Now, go ahead
328
00:14:31,131 --> 00:14:33,829
and grab the same layer
on the other side.
329
00:14:33,829 --> 00:14:35,875
And just go for it!
330
00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:38,225
Okay. [sighs]
331
00:14:38,225 --> 00:14:41,054
♪ Happiness comes
from inside ♪
332
00:14:41,054 --> 00:14:43,447
♪ At the center
of your mind... ♪
333
00:14:43,447 --> 00:14:44,535
Fuck.
334
00:14:44,535 --> 00:14:45,885
[Bella] Does it look even?
335
00:14:46,276 --> 00:14:47,887
Uh...
336
00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:49,671
Not exactly. No.
337
00:14:49,671 --> 00:14:52,152
Good job.
You look amazing!
338
00:14:53,762 --> 00:14:55,155
Thank you.
339
00:14:55,155 --> 00:14:57,766
♪ You can change
the darkest day ♪
340
00:14:57,766 --> 00:15:00,682
♪ Simply by
the things you say... ♪
341
00:15:01,683 --> 00:15:03,293
Wow...
342
00:15:03,293 --> 00:15:06,340
♪ Oooh oooh ooh ♪
343
00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:09,604
I love it.
344
00:15:09,604 --> 00:15:11,084
[indistinct tv chatter]
345
00:15:12,824 --> 00:15:16,263
Oh, my God. Allie,
what the hell is all this?
346
00:15:16,263 --> 00:15:20,006
You have got to stop buying
all this crap.
347
00:15:21,659 --> 00:15:25,185
Yeah, well, one of them
is an acrylic nail set
348
00:15:25,185 --> 00:15:27,578
that I know you'll appreciate
more than I will.
349
00:15:27,578 --> 00:15:28,971
And the others
are ankle weights.
350
00:15:28,971 --> 00:15:30,973
Remember? We said we were
gonna get in shape?
351
00:15:31,887 --> 00:15:33,454
Oh, my God.
352
00:15:33,454 --> 00:15:36,500
Allie, what the hell
did you do to your hair?
353
00:15:36,500 --> 00:15:37,980
What? It's makeover Monday.
354
00:15:37,980 --> 00:15:40,983
- It's Friday.
- Oh.
355
00:15:40,983 --> 00:15:43,029
- It's so dark in here.
- No, please, don't open that.
356
00:15:43,029 --> 00:15:44,421
Mama, that is so bright!
357
00:15:44,421 --> 00:15:46,467
[Diane] Did you go
to physical therapy today?
358
00:15:46,467 --> 00:15:48,425
Um, well, I tried to,
359
00:15:48,425 --> 00:15:50,471
- but I overslept.
- Allie...
360
00:15:50,471 --> 00:15:52,864
What? I don't need PT.
I don't.
361
00:15:52,864 --> 00:15:54,257
Allie, your hair.
362
00:15:55,041 --> 00:15:56,607
You don't like it?
363
00:15:56,607 --> 00:15:58,740
I just don't understand why
you would cut your own hair.
364
00:15:58,740 --> 00:16:01,090
Well, the girl said
it was easy, and it was not.
365
00:16:01,090 --> 00:16:02,483
What girl?
366
00:16:02,483 --> 00:16:05,877
This girl on the Internet.
She's an influencer.
367
00:16:05,877 --> 00:16:07,705
She influenced me.
368
00:16:07,705 --> 00:16:12,058
Such a pigsty in here.
I am not happy about this.
369
00:16:12,058 --> 00:16:13,885
Hey, Mama, can you tell me
where my pills are?
370
00:16:13,885 --> 00:16:16,366
Which ones?
371
00:16:16,366 --> 00:16:20,022
We said we were going to
wean off of them. Remember?
372
00:16:20,022 --> 00:16:21,981
- Did we?
- Yes.
373
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:24,722
Because "we" are in pain
374
00:16:24,722 --> 00:16:26,594
and "we" need more.
375
00:16:26,594 --> 00:16:27,943
They're not gonna
give you more, Allie.
376
00:16:27,943 --> 00:16:29,379
- They have to!
- No, they don't.
377
00:16:29,379 --> 00:16:30,902
I need them!
378
00:16:30,902 --> 00:16:32,513
Listen to me.
379
00:16:32,513 --> 00:16:34,645
You're not in physical pain anymore.
380
00:16:34,645 --> 00:16:36,778
Have you been doing
the tapping thing
381
00:16:36,778 --> 00:16:38,171
that that one shrink
taught you?
382
00:16:38,171 --> 00:16:40,390
Remember?
For anxiety and stress,
383
00:16:40,390 --> 00:16:42,218
and it calms you down
on the...
384
00:16:42,218 --> 00:16:43,915
- eyes, and then the lips.
- Mom!
385
00:16:43,915 --> 00:16:45,613
[Diane] Or play your piano.
That always cheers you up.
386
00:16:45,613 --> 00:16:46,962
I don't wanna talk
about this, please.
387
00:16:46,962 --> 00:16:49,791
I have the worst headache!
Can you just stop?
388
00:16:49,791 --> 00:16:52,707
Can you call the doctors
and help me, please?
389
00:16:52,707 --> 00:16:54,491
Which one? Patel?
He said no more.
390
00:16:54,491 --> 00:16:56,841
Okay, well, fuck Patel.
Fuck Patel!
391
00:16:56,841 --> 00:16:58,626
How about Goldberg, or...
392
00:16:58,626 --> 00:17:00,497
or Fong?
393
00:17:00,497 --> 00:17:02,108
- Allie...
- Please, Mom.
394
00:17:02,108 --> 00:17:03,283
- Just call 'em. Just help me.
- You're being a little...
395
00:17:03,283 --> 00:17:04,675
- No.
- Just help me, please.
396
00:17:04,675 --> 00:17:06,286
Guess what?
They all said "no."
397
00:17:06,286 --> 00:17:08,331
Patel. Goldberg.
Fong. Rosenberg.
398
00:17:08,331 --> 00:17:10,246
Okay, well, I'll try Vromen.
He loves me.
399
00:17:10,246 --> 00:17:12,161
Vromen is an orthodontist.
400
00:17:12,161 --> 00:17:13,641
Yeah, but he used to
flirt with me
401
00:17:13,641 --> 00:17:15,730
when his fingers were really
deep inside my mouth,
402
00:17:15,730 --> 00:17:18,254
and it was very inappropriate,
and so, he really owes me one.
403
00:17:18,254 --> 00:17:20,126
Allie, I don't like
how you're acting.
404
00:17:20,126 --> 00:17:21,344
You know what?
Enough is enough.
405
00:17:21,344 --> 00:17:23,129
You gotta get out
of this living room,
406
00:17:23,129 --> 00:17:24,739
take off your pajamas,
407
00:17:24,739 --> 00:17:26,654
and get your ass,
and go get a job.
408
00:17:26,654 --> 00:17:27,785
I'm sick of this crap.
409
00:17:27,785 --> 00:17:30,092
As if you have any right
410
00:17:30,092 --> 00:17:32,181
lecturing me
on medicating myself.
411
00:17:32,181 --> 00:17:33,574
What is that supposed to mean?
412
00:17:33,574 --> 00:17:36,751
It means, Mom, you're such
a fucking hypocrite!
413
00:17:36,751 --> 00:17:39,580
You don't think that I clock
how many Xanax you take?
414
00:17:39,580 --> 00:17:41,756
Or how many glasses of wine
you drink?
415
00:17:41,756 --> 00:17:43,758
You think I'm just a zombie
that doesn't notice anything,
416
00:17:43,758 --> 00:17:46,456
but I notice
fucking everything! I see you.
417
00:17:46,456 --> 00:17:50,069
So, can I have my pills, please?
418
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:52,288
You're not listening.
There's no more.
419
00:17:52,288 --> 00:17:53,811
[breathes heavily]
420
00:17:59,513 --> 00:18:01,428
[Diane] You get
right back here,
421
00:18:01,428 --> 00:18:03,038
- you little brat!
- No!
422
00:18:03,038 --> 00:18:05,475
What in the hell do you think
you are doing?
423
00:18:05,475 --> 00:18:06,737
Get out of there!
424
00:18:06,737 --> 00:18:07,912
- Get out of there!
- [Allison] Get off me!
425
00:18:07,912 --> 00:18:09,392
- No! Get out of there!
- Let go!
426
00:18:09,392 --> 00:18:11,655
- [Diane] What are you doing?
- No! Are they in here?
427
00:18:11,655 --> 00:18:14,441
- [Diane] Get back! Cut it out!
- You are hurting me!
428
00:18:14,441 --> 00:18:15,790
[Diane] Stop it!
429
00:18:15,790 --> 00:18:17,574
- Stop it! Put that back!
- [grunts] Mom!
430
00:18:18,662 --> 00:18:19,707
No.
431
00:18:19,707 --> 00:18:21,143
- Open the door.
- No.
432
00:18:21,143 --> 00:18:22,753
- Open the fucking door!
- Stop it! Stop it.
433
00:18:22,753 --> 00:18:24,103
- Mom, let me out.
- No.
434
00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:26,279
Let me out. Let me out!
435
00:18:26,279 --> 00:18:27,541
Mama!
436
00:18:27,541 --> 00:18:29,325
- No! Stop it!
- Give me those... Ow.
437
00:18:29,325 --> 00:18:31,501
- Stop it!
- [Diane] Ow! Ow, ow, ow, ow.
438
00:18:31,501 --> 00:18:33,634
- You fucking crazy little brat.
- [Allison] No!
439
00:18:34,548 --> 00:18:35,766
[groans]
440
00:18:36,245 --> 00:18:38,204
Shit!
441
00:18:38,204 --> 00:18:40,510
No, no, no, no, no, no.
442
00:18:40,510 --> 00:18:42,512
Mama, no! Please. No!
443
00:18:44,688 --> 00:18:46,734
Why the fuck did you do that?
444
00:18:46,734 --> 00:18:47,909
I'm in pain!
445
00:18:47,909 --> 00:18:49,040
I don't give a shit!
446
00:18:49,040 --> 00:18:50,520
Your daughter
is in actual pain!
447
00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:51,956
I don't give a shit!
448
00:18:51,956 --> 00:18:55,525
I fucking hate you so much!
449
00:18:55,525 --> 00:18:57,179
[Diane] You're bleeding!
450
00:18:57,179 --> 00:18:59,355
[panting]
451
00:19:01,357 --> 00:19:02,706
You get back here right now.
452
00:19:02,706 --> 00:19:04,143
- ALLISON: Leave me alone.
- You come back here.
453
00:19:04,143 --> 00:19:05,231
- ALLISON: Leave me alone.
- I'm gonna grab your...
454
00:19:05,231 --> 00:19:06,536
[arguing continues]
455
00:19:06,536 --> 00:19:07,885
[Allison]
Leave me the fuck alone!
456
00:19:07,885 --> 00:19:09,060
[Diane] I'm not gonna leave you
the fuck alone,
457
00:19:09,060 --> 00:19:10,236
- you little brat.
- Ugh!
458
00:19:11,976 --> 00:19:14,022
[mellow music playing]
459
00:19:15,937 --> 00:19:17,286
Allison!
460
00:19:17,286 --> 00:19:19,419
- Leave me alone!
- [Diane] Where are you going?
461
00:19:19,419 --> 00:19:21,290
Leave me alone!
462
00:19:23,205 --> 00:19:25,381
[panting]
463
00:19:30,691 --> 00:19:32,519
[crowd applauding and cheering]
464
00:19:32,519 --> 00:19:34,303
[Daniel] Let's go, Ryan!
465
00:19:35,609 --> 00:19:37,437
Attagirl! Attagirl!
466
00:19:41,658 --> 00:19:42,790
[crowd groans]
467
00:19:44,095 --> 00:19:46,097
Fuck! [sighs]
468
00:19:46,097 --> 00:19:47,838
So you're the Ryan
that's been talking to Damien?
469
00:19:47,838 --> 00:19:49,100
Get the fuck outta my face.
470
00:19:49,100 --> 00:19:50,319
See, you talk to people
like that, bitch,
471
00:19:50,319 --> 00:19:51,842
that's why you have
no fucking friends.
472
00:19:51,842 --> 00:19:53,017
Why are you
hitting on me, huh?
473
00:19:53,017 --> 00:19:54,497
Uh, I'm not the one
named "Ryan."
474
00:19:54,497 --> 00:19:56,238
It's a fucking dyke's name.
You a dyke?
475
00:19:56,238 --> 00:19:59,154
- Only when I fuck your mother.
- Oh, at least I have a mother.
476
00:20:02,592 --> 00:20:04,159
What the fuck
did you just say to me?
477
00:20:04,899 --> 00:20:06,161
Hey!
478
00:20:06,161 --> 00:20:09,425
Stay away from Damien,
you fucking whore.
479
00:20:10,383 --> 00:20:11,427
Hey!
480
00:20:11,427 --> 00:20:13,386
Break that up, Ref!
481
00:20:13,386 --> 00:20:14,778
- [Ryan grunts]
- [whistle blowing]
482
00:20:14,778 --> 00:20:15,866
[referee] Break it up.
Break it up!
483
00:20:16,171 --> 00:20:17,216
Hey!
484
00:20:18,129 --> 00:20:19,827
[whistle continues blowing]
485
00:20:19,827 --> 00:20:22,873
[referee] Hey! That's it!
You're both out. Red card.
486
00:20:22,873 --> 00:20:24,266
[Daniel] Ryan,
what the hell was that?
487
00:20:24,266 --> 00:20:25,746
[huffs] I quit.
488
00:20:25,746 --> 00:20:28,052
[tearfully] I quit.
I hate this fucking game.
489
00:20:28,052 --> 00:20:30,098
Why? Because you got
in a fight?
490
00:20:30,098 --> 00:20:32,143
Come on, that's not you.
491
00:20:32,143 --> 00:20:34,276
You're tough.
You're not a quitter.
492
00:20:34,276 --> 00:20:37,323
- She made fun of Mom.
- What?
493
00:20:37,323 --> 00:20:39,499
She said,
"At least I have a mom."
494
00:20:42,284 --> 00:20:43,851
Well, fuck her.
495
00:20:47,550 --> 00:20:48,638
Well...
496
00:20:49,987 --> 00:20:52,425
And what kind of a punch
was that?
497
00:20:52,425 --> 00:20:54,688
You throw this hard right hook
498
00:20:54,688 --> 00:20:57,343
and then you leave yourself
wide open for the jab.
499
00:20:58,431 --> 00:21:00,128
We're gonna have to work
on that.
500
00:21:01,738 --> 00:21:03,740
[mellow music playing]
501
00:21:11,139 --> 00:21:13,141
[breathing heavily]
502
00:21:17,841 --> 00:21:19,016
Hi.
503
00:21:19,016 --> 00:21:21,584
I'm here to get
a prescription refilled.
504
00:21:21,584 --> 00:21:24,413
Last name, Johnson.
Birthday, August 24th.
505
00:21:24,413 --> 00:21:26,372
Okay. For which medication?
506
00:21:26,372 --> 00:21:29,505
Uh... The Oxy. OxyContin.
507
00:21:29,505 --> 00:21:31,681
It says here
you are out of refills.
508
00:21:31,681 --> 00:21:34,293
I see you've been on them
for over a year now.
509
00:21:34,293 --> 00:21:36,382
Your doctor's probably trying
to wean you off of them.
510
00:21:36,382 --> 00:21:38,775
As I'm sure you know,
they can be very addictive.
511
00:21:38,775 --> 00:21:40,647
Oh, really?
I hadn't fucking heard that.
512
00:21:42,518 --> 00:21:43,650
Sorry.
513
00:21:43,650 --> 00:21:45,391
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
514
00:21:46,130 --> 00:21:48,307
Listen...
515
00:21:48,307 --> 00:21:50,221
I was in a really bad
car accident,
516
00:21:50,221 --> 00:21:53,312
and I need them,
because I'm in a lot of pain.
517
00:21:53,312 --> 00:21:54,356
Just now?
518
00:21:55,575 --> 00:21:56,706
What? No.
519
00:21:56,706 --> 00:21:59,274
Your elbow is bleeding.
520
00:21:59,274 --> 00:22:01,058
Oh, shit.
Look, it's fine.
521
00:22:01,058 --> 00:22:02,582
Let me go get you a bandage.
522
00:22:02,582 --> 00:22:04,453
I don't need
a fucking bandage. It's fine.
523
00:22:08,718 --> 00:22:09,806
Then take this.
524
00:22:12,635 --> 00:22:14,811
Oh, my goodness.
Thank you so much. Thank you.
525
00:22:17,118 --> 00:22:19,773
I feel so much better now.
Thank you.
526
00:22:20,295 --> 00:22:21,644
Fucking bitch.
527
00:22:27,215 --> 00:22:29,217
[hip-hop song playing]
528
00:22:33,003 --> 00:22:34,875
[instructor on speaker] Burn,
but guess what that burn is?
529
00:22:34,875 --> 00:22:37,965
That burn is in your soul.
It is lifting you up.
530
00:22:37,965 --> 00:22:39,401
You are climbing that mountain
531
00:22:39,401 --> 00:22:41,316
and you are reaching
higher heights
532
00:22:41,316 --> 00:22:42,970
than you ever have before.
533
00:22:42,970 --> 00:22:44,319
Keep pedaling.
534
00:22:49,193 --> 00:22:51,544
[breathing heavily]
535
00:23:00,640 --> 00:23:02,903
[unnerving music playing]
536
00:23:13,783 --> 00:23:15,785
[inhales sharply]
537
00:23:21,487 --> 00:23:22,531
[sniffles]
538
00:23:30,321 --> 00:23:31,714
[gurgles]
539
00:23:32,454 --> 00:23:33,803
[swallows]
540
00:23:34,500 --> 00:23:35,936
[exhales sharply]
541
00:23:37,198 --> 00:23:38,765
[whimpers]
542
00:23:42,856 --> 00:23:44,640
[panting]
543
00:23:48,862 --> 00:23:52,039
[back-up alarm beeping]
544
00:23:52,039 --> 00:23:54,171
[horn blaring]
545
00:23:57,218 --> 00:23:59,263
[gasping]
546
00:24:01,352 --> 00:24:03,354
[panting]
547
00:24:12,276 --> 00:24:14,409
[mellow music playing]
548
00:24:20,197 --> 00:24:22,417
- [gasps] Hi.
- Hi!
549
00:24:22,417 --> 00:24:24,245
- Hey!
- Hi!
550
00:24:25,376 --> 00:24:26,508
- [giggles]
- [Allison] Hi.
551
00:24:26,508 --> 00:24:29,119
Oh, my God. I love your hair!
552
00:24:29,119 --> 00:24:32,775
- It is so chic. Who did it?
- Ah, thank you! Um...
553
00:24:32,775 --> 00:24:35,386
I, uh, got a new gal.
554
00:24:35,386 --> 00:24:37,954
Well, I gotta get her number.
[laughs]
555
00:24:37,954 --> 00:24:39,390
Okay.
556
00:24:39,390 --> 00:24:42,350
Oh, I was so happy
that you reached out.
557
00:24:42,350 --> 00:24:45,309
Because you weren't responding
to any of my texts.
558
00:24:45,309 --> 00:24:47,181
Of course, I wanted
to give you your space,
559
00:24:47,181 --> 00:24:48,878
but I was worried.
560
00:24:48,878 --> 00:24:50,358
- [waiter] Hi, good morning.
- Hey!
561
00:24:50,358 --> 00:24:51,664
Can I get you anything?
562
00:24:51,664 --> 00:24:54,536
Uh, yeah. Can I please get
a Jack and Coke?
563
00:24:55,058 --> 00:24:57,060
Uh...
564
00:24:57,060 --> 00:24:59,498
Sorry, our bar doesn't
actually open until 11:00.
565
00:24:59,498 --> 00:25:00,847
Oh.
566
00:25:00,847 --> 00:25:04,328
Uh, okay. In that case,
I'll get a black coffee.
567
00:25:04,328 --> 00:25:06,113
- Oat milk latte.
- You got it.
568
00:25:09,420 --> 00:25:11,814
So, how's, how's work?
569
00:25:11,814 --> 00:25:12,989
You're still at Purdue, right?
570
00:25:12,989 --> 00:25:14,556
- Still repping Purdue.
- Yeah.
571
00:25:14,556 --> 00:25:15,949
You'd think it would've been
a shit show
572
00:25:15,949 --> 00:25:17,777
because of the bankruptcy
and all the lawsuits.
573
00:25:17,777 --> 00:25:19,648
- Mm.
- But, between you and me,
574
00:25:19,648 --> 00:25:21,520
my numbers
have actually increased.
575
00:25:21,520 --> 00:25:22,782
Wow.
576
00:25:22,782 --> 00:25:26,133
My bonus last quarter
was insane.
577
00:25:26,133 --> 00:25:28,309
- It sells itself. [chuckles]
- Yeah.
578
00:25:28,309 --> 00:25:29,528
Karl Marx was wrong.
579
00:25:29,528 --> 00:25:31,660
Turns out
the opiate of the masses
580
00:25:31,660 --> 00:25:32,748
is opium.
581
00:25:32,748 --> 00:25:34,533
[both chuckle]
582
00:25:37,492 --> 00:25:38,667
Anyway.
583
00:25:38,667 --> 00:25:39,929
How are you doing?
584
00:25:39,929 --> 00:25:41,452
When are you going back
to work?
585
00:25:41,452 --> 00:25:42,802
[smacks lips] Listen,
I'm just gonna cut right to it
586
00:25:42,802 --> 00:25:43,890
because you're my friend
587
00:25:43,890 --> 00:25:45,892
and I know
you're gonna understand.
588
00:25:45,892 --> 00:25:47,067
Um...
589
00:25:48,198 --> 00:25:50,810
I'm still in a lot of pain.
590
00:25:50,810 --> 00:25:52,333
Oh, Allie...
591
00:25:52,333 --> 00:25:56,467
I know, and my docs
are cutting my Oxy scripts
592
00:25:56,467 --> 00:25:58,731
because everyone's
really freaked out
593
00:25:58,731 --> 00:26:00,210
about addiction these days.
594
00:26:00,210 --> 00:26:02,038
Uh... [hesitates]
595
00:26:02,038 --> 00:26:04,737
So, I was wondering
if it would be possible...
596
00:26:04,737 --> 00:26:06,608
Allie, please tell me
you didn't invite me
597
00:26:06,608 --> 00:26:08,871
to breakfast
to hit me up for pills.
598
00:26:09,263 --> 00:26:10,394
No.
599
00:26:10,394 --> 00:26:12,396
- No, no, no, no, no.
- [sighs]
600
00:26:12,396 --> 00:26:14,616
It's just until I can get in,
and see my docs.
601
00:26:14,616 --> 00:26:16,792
Um, because my fucking mother,
602
00:26:16,792 --> 00:26:19,578
she threw my last refill
into the toilet, so...
603
00:26:19,969 --> 00:26:21,623
No way.
604
00:26:21,623 --> 00:26:23,320
Are you fucking
with me right now?
605
00:26:23,320 --> 00:26:24,800
No.
606
00:26:24,800 --> 00:26:26,802
If you have a problem,
you need to get some help.
607
00:26:26,802 --> 00:26:29,239
I can help you
find the right rehab.
608
00:26:29,239 --> 00:26:31,285
Please don't hand me
a pamphlet.
609
00:26:31,285 --> 00:26:32,808
I already have one.
610
00:26:32,808 --> 00:26:35,115
Well, then find them
on the street if you have to.
611
00:26:35,115 --> 00:26:37,160
Every dive bar
in this town's got a guy
612
00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:39,336
with a pharmacy
in his front pocket.
613
00:26:39,336 --> 00:26:41,208
You know, Becka,
614
00:26:42,470 --> 00:26:44,559
I really didn't want
to do this.
615
00:26:46,343 --> 00:26:47,431
But...
616
00:26:49,390 --> 00:26:50,826
there's a handful of things
617
00:26:50,826 --> 00:26:54,090
that happened
at your bachelorette party
618
00:26:54,090 --> 00:26:57,659
that I'm pretty sure
you want to be kept private.
619
00:26:57,659 --> 00:27:01,315
Allison, are you trying
to blackmail me for OxyContin?
620
00:27:01,315 --> 00:27:03,143
I'm just asking you for help.
621
00:27:04,274 --> 00:27:06,494
Like, as a friend.
622
00:27:08,322 --> 00:27:10,498
But you did blow that dancer.
[chuckles]
623
00:27:11,455 --> 00:27:12,718
It happened for a second.
624
00:27:12,718 --> 00:27:15,851
I know, I know.
But you did it, and I saw.
625
00:27:16,852 --> 00:27:17,940
It never went in my mouth.
626
00:27:17,940 --> 00:27:21,509
It was in your mouth.
627
00:27:21,509 --> 00:27:22,771
Past the tip.
628
00:27:23,729 --> 00:27:26,253
Past the fucking tip.
629
00:27:27,297 --> 00:27:28,647
Allie, you need help.
630
00:27:29,822 --> 00:27:31,475
Destroy my life
if you have to.
631
00:27:31,475 --> 00:27:35,088
But for the love of God,
get some fucking help!
632
00:27:35,088 --> 00:27:36,567
Okay, bye.
Fuck you.
633
00:27:36,567 --> 00:27:38,004
Fuck you!
634
00:27:42,878 --> 00:27:43,923
[grunts]
635
00:27:43,923 --> 00:27:46,229
Uh... I don't...
Oh, fuck.
636
00:27:46,229 --> 00:27:48,623
[sighs]
637
00:27:48,623 --> 00:27:50,320
I don't have any money.
I'm really sorry.
638
00:27:50,320 --> 00:27:51,670
I can't pay for those.
639
00:27:51,670 --> 00:27:54,150
That's okay. Take it.
640
00:27:54,150 --> 00:27:56,065
I mixed in a little tequila
for you.
641
00:28:00,722 --> 00:28:01,941
[slurps]
642
00:28:04,683 --> 00:28:06,032
That's disgusting.
643
00:28:07,555 --> 00:28:08,556
Thank you.
644
00:28:11,646 --> 00:28:14,431
[woman] Mr. Adams,
we really wanna do
645
00:28:14,431 --> 00:28:16,607
everything we can
to help Ryan.
646
00:28:18,871 --> 00:28:20,481
But she needs to take
some responsibility
647
00:28:20,481 --> 00:28:22,483
for her behavior.
648
00:28:22,483 --> 00:28:25,573
That girl does not listen
to a thing I say.
649
00:28:27,227 --> 00:28:28,707
To be honest,
650
00:28:28,707 --> 00:28:30,447
I was hoping
you were calling me in here
651
00:28:30,447 --> 00:28:32,145
to give me some advice.
652
00:28:33,886 --> 00:28:35,714
I need help.
653
00:28:35,714 --> 00:28:37,716
[man] It's just that
we're a public school.
654
00:28:37,716 --> 00:28:40,631
We have 2,000 kids
to look after.
655
00:28:40,631 --> 00:28:42,198
We don't have the bandwidth
656
00:28:42,198 --> 00:28:44,853
to micromanage her in ways
that she deserves and needs.
657
00:28:44,853 --> 00:28:46,594
So, what are you saying?
658
00:28:47,595 --> 00:28:49,292
I will give her
an extra strike
659
00:28:49,292 --> 00:28:51,730
because of the circumstances.
660
00:28:51,730 --> 00:28:53,383
But if she doesn't tone down
her language
661
00:28:53,383 --> 00:28:55,037
with her teachers
662
00:28:55,037 --> 00:28:56,909
and gets into one more fight,
663
00:28:57,866 --> 00:28:59,215
we'll have to expel her.
664
00:29:18,495 --> 00:29:19,670
[chair scraps]
665
00:29:20,889 --> 00:29:23,762
Hi, can I get
a double tequila, please?
666
00:29:31,726 --> 00:29:32,727
Allison.
667
00:29:33,684 --> 00:29:35,774
Yo, I know you.
668
00:29:36,905 --> 00:29:37,906
It's Mark.
669
00:29:38,864 --> 00:29:40,039
Yeah, hey.
670
00:29:40,039 --> 00:29:41,910
Yeah.
671
00:29:41,910 --> 00:29:44,565
I haven't seen you
since high school.
672
00:29:44,565 --> 00:29:47,002
This is Diego.
You remember Diego?
673
00:29:47,002 --> 00:29:48,177
- Hey.
- [Diego] Hey.
674
00:29:49,222 --> 00:29:51,006
You just having
a little breakfast?
675
00:29:51,006 --> 00:29:53,792
Uh... Um... I just...
676
00:29:55,402 --> 00:29:57,317
I just needed
to get out of the house.
677
00:29:57,317 --> 00:29:59,406
[chuckles] Yeah, I feel that.
678
00:29:59,406 --> 00:30:01,843
I heard what happened to you.
The accident.
679
00:30:01,843 --> 00:30:03,018
Saw it in the Star Ledger. Sorry.
680
00:30:03,018 --> 00:30:04,454
What happened?
681
00:30:04,454 --> 00:30:05,673
[Diego] She was in that
accident on the turnpike.
682
00:30:05,673 --> 00:30:07,240
Two people died.
683
00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:08,807
Holy shit.
684
00:30:09,851 --> 00:30:11,244
That was you.
685
00:30:12,201 --> 00:30:14,203
Oh, bro.
686
00:30:14,203 --> 00:30:16,162
That would've fucked me up.
687
00:30:16,162 --> 00:30:17,380
It wasn't my fault.
688
00:30:17,380 --> 00:30:19,992
Yeah, I'm sure.
But, like, still...
689
00:30:25,867 --> 00:30:26,825
[Mark] Damn.
690
00:30:30,263 --> 00:30:33,266
[exhales sharply] Hey, can I
have another one, please?
691
00:30:34,571 --> 00:30:35,746
You having a tough day?
692
00:30:36,965 --> 00:30:38,314
Just a day.
693
00:30:39,750 --> 00:30:42,014
I just wanna get as far away
from here as possible.
694
00:30:42,014 --> 00:30:43,363
Yo, there's this app,
695
00:30:43,363 --> 00:30:44,755
it tells you
the exact opposite
696
00:30:44,755 --> 00:30:46,670
of where you are
on the globe is.
697
00:30:46,670 --> 00:30:48,759
That's where you should go.
I'll look it up for you.
698
00:30:48,759 --> 00:30:51,327
[Mark] Yo, that's how I feel
every fuckin' day of my life.
699
00:30:51,327 --> 00:30:53,764
I can't seem to escape
this town.
700
00:30:53,764 --> 00:30:55,418
It's like there's
a force field around it
701
00:30:55,418 --> 00:30:57,072
or something.
702
00:30:57,072 --> 00:30:59,770
Like, some people know
how to get outta here.
703
00:30:59,770 --> 00:31:01,294
But the rest of us,
704
00:31:01,294 --> 00:31:03,035
we just keep banging our heads
up against the glass.
705
00:31:03,035 --> 00:31:05,211
It's Perth. That's the city
706
00:31:05,211 --> 00:31:07,082
on the other side of the globe
from here.
707
00:31:07,082 --> 00:31:08,954
You should go to Perth.
708
00:31:08,954 --> 00:31:11,521
I don't have enough money
to get to Perth,
709
00:31:11,521 --> 00:31:13,001
but thank you.
710
00:31:13,001 --> 00:31:14,960
Aren't you engaged
to Nathan Adams?
711
00:31:16,178 --> 00:31:18,137
I was, yeah.
712
00:31:18,137 --> 00:31:20,704
He was an amazing running back
in high school.
713
00:31:20,704 --> 00:31:21,880
He used to run
every fucking play.
714
00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:23,011
- You remember him, Mark?
- [Mark] Yeah.
715
00:31:23,011 --> 00:31:24,143
[Diego] Every fucking play,
716
00:31:24,143 --> 00:31:25,753
they'd come
on the PA system like,
717
00:31:25,753 --> 00:31:29,365
"Nathan Adams,
the ball carrier."
718
00:31:29,365 --> 00:31:31,324
He was the whole fucking team.
You remember him, Mark?
719
00:31:31,324 --> 00:31:33,195
Yeah, I remember him.
720
00:31:33,195 --> 00:31:34,762
Isn't he deaf?
721
00:31:34,762 --> 00:31:38,157
Uh... In one ear. Since birth.
722
00:31:38,157 --> 00:31:39,462
Wow, that's impressive
723
00:31:39,462 --> 00:31:41,073
that he could be, like,
that good, you know?
724
00:31:41,073 --> 00:31:42,726
And half deaf.
725
00:31:42,726 --> 00:31:44,032
So you're, like, single?
726
00:31:44,032 --> 00:31:47,079
[Mark chuckles] Yo.
Shut the fuck up, Diego.
727
00:31:47,079 --> 00:31:49,516
What? You think
she's gonna date you?
728
00:31:49,516 --> 00:31:51,213
Where are you gonna take her?
You live with your mom.
729
00:31:51,213 --> 00:31:54,042
[chuckles] God damn.
730
00:31:54,042 --> 00:31:55,261
Allison, I'm sorry.
731
00:31:55,261 --> 00:31:58,351
My fucking friend
has no tact at all.
732
00:31:58,351 --> 00:32:01,093
[chuckles]
We're not used to having
733
00:32:01,093 --> 00:32:03,747
pretty girls such as yourself
come in here.
734
00:32:03,747 --> 00:32:05,488
So, you gotta excuse his
735
00:32:05,488 --> 00:32:07,229
lack of decor.
736
00:32:09,492 --> 00:32:10,711
Decorum.
737
00:32:11,538 --> 00:32:12,626
What?
738
00:32:13,757 --> 00:32:16,021
"Decor" is
739
00:32:16,021 --> 00:32:20,112
the Bud Light lamp
above my head.
740
00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:23,854
"Decorum" is his behavior.
741
00:32:25,465 --> 00:32:27,771
Neither is currently ideal.
742
00:32:29,077 --> 00:32:31,166
[men cheering]
743
00:32:32,472 --> 00:32:34,300
Hey, can I ask you
something, like,
744
00:32:35,388 --> 00:32:37,085
between us old friends?
745
00:32:37,085 --> 00:32:39,348
You weren't our friend.
You were popular.
746
00:32:39,348 --> 00:32:41,524
- You were a bitch, actually.
- All right. Diego.
747
00:32:43,265 --> 00:32:46,051
That's old shit.
Right, Allison?
748
00:32:46,051 --> 00:32:48,531
We're past that.
We're grown-ups.
749
00:32:48,531 --> 00:32:51,447
Those of us stuck behind
this force field,
750
00:32:51,447 --> 00:32:54,407
- we gotta stick together.
- [Allison] Yeah.
751
00:32:54,407 --> 00:32:58,628
Um, do you know
where I could get some Oxy?
752
00:32:58,628 --> 00:33:00,152
[chuckling] God damn, girl.
753
00:33:00,152 --> 00:33:02,328
No foreplay. No nothing.
754
00:33:02,328 --> 00:33:05,548
No "How are you?
How's your family?"
755
00:33:05,548 --> 00:33:06,985
No, we don't fuck with pills.
756
00:33:07,768 --> 00:33:09,161
I remember in high school
757
00:33:09,161 --> 00:33:11,076
you were the guys
that could, like,
758
00:33:11,990 --> 00:33:13,208
get anything.
759
00:33:13,208 --> 00:33:15,167
And now you're just
buttering us up.
760
00:33:16,777 --> 00:33:18,866
I don't have any money.
761
00:33:18,866 --> 00:33:21,303
How are you gonna pay
for that tequila?
762
00:33:21,303 --> 00:33:24,002
I hadn't got that far yet.
[sighs]
763
00:33:24,002 --> 00:33:25,916
- Is that Rolex real?
- Wait a second.
764
00:33:26,613 --> 00:33:28,615
Wait. Allie Johnson.
765
00:33:28,615 --> 00:33:31,574
Miss lovely Allie Johnson.
[grunts]
766
00:33:32,706 --> 00:33:34,838
You just stroll in here.
767
00:33:34,838 --> 00:33:36,753
[chuckling] You got no money.
768
00:33:36,753 --> 00:33:39,234
And you expect us
to get you Oxy?
769
00:33:39,234 --> 00:33:41,932
For free, and then you want us
to pay for your drink.
770
00:33:43,456 --> 00:33:44,935
Why the fuck would we do that?
771
00:33:46,415 --> 00:33:47,851
Nostalgia?
772
00:33:48,896 --> 00:33:50,332
Old friends?
773
00:33:50,332 --> 00:33:51,942
You thought you were
such hot shit in high school.
774
00:33:51,942 --> 00:33:53,118
You're no
fucking different now.
775
00:33:53,118 --> 00:33:54,597
All right. Shut up.
776
00:33:54,989 --> 00:33:56,425
Sorry.
777
00:33:56,425 --> 00:33:59,776
This guy. No decorum.
778
00:33:59,776 --> 00:34:00,951
No, he's right.
779
00:34:02,344 --> 00:34:04,912
I didn't think I was better
than you. I knew it.
780
00:34:05,956 --> 00:34:07,610
I looked down
on guys like you.
781
00:34:09,090 --> 00:34:12,006
I thought
you were Jersey trash
782
00:34:12,006 --> 00:34:14,617
that would never be able
to make it out of town.
783
00:34:15,531 --> 00:34:17,055
[snorts, laughs]
784
00:34:17,968 --> 00:34:19,492
Fucking bitch.
785
00:34:19,492 --> 00:34:21,320
But now you're sitting here
786
00:34:22,060 --> 00:34:23,713
right beside us
787
00:34:23,713 --> 00:34:26,368
and you're looking for a fix.
788
00:34:26,368 --> 00:34:27,935
A favor.
789
00:34:27,935 --> 00:34:30,155
The favor is a fix.
790
00:34:31,721 --> 00:34:33,984
- You're a fucking junkie now.
- No, I'm not.
791
00:34:33,984 --> 00:34:36,074
- You're a fucking junkie.
- No.
792
00:34:36,074 --> 00:34:37,162
- [Mark] Yeah, you are.
- Yeah, you are.
793
00:34:37,162 --> 00:34:38,554
Come on.
You're a fuckin' junkie.
794
00:34:38,554 --> 00:34:39,860
No. I'm not like you.
795
00:34:39,860 --> 00:34:41,296
Allie Johnson,
796
00:34:41,296 --> 00:34:43,690
you're so much more
like who you think we are
797
00:34:43,690 --> 00:34:45,213
than we actually are.
798
00:34:47,085 --> 00:34:49,478
Come on.
Say it, say it, say it.
799
00:34:49,478 --> 00:34:51,263
"I'm a fucking junkie."
You might like it.
800
00:34:51,263 --> 00:34:53,091
Fuck you. It's a pill.
801
00:34:53,091 --> 00:34:56,224
It's heroin
in a pretty little dress.
802
00:34:56,224 --> 00:34:57,921
I thought you were
the nice one.
803
00:34:59,271 --> 00:35:01,882
Why don't you say it?
Say... Say,
804
00:35:02,752 --> 00:35:05,146
"I'm a fucking junkie,"
805
00:35:05,146 --> 00:35:07,714
and then I'll get you whatever
you want. Anything.
806
00:35:09,237 --> 00:35:12,501
Say it. Just, like,
just come out with it.
807
00:35:12,501 --> 00:35:13,676
I'm currently reliant...
808
00:35:13,676 --> 00:35:17,202
No, that's not
what I fucking said.
809
00:35:17,202 --> 00:35:20,074
You sneaky little bitch.
That's not what I fucking said.
810
00:35:20,074 --> 00:35:21,336
- Is that what I said?
- No.
811
00:35:21,336 --> 00:35:23,164
That is not what I said.
812
00:35:25,035 --> 00:35:27,516
Say you're a fuckin' junkie.
Look at me.
813
00:35:27,516 --> 00:35:28,691
Look at me!
814
00:35:29,692 --> 00:35:32,521
Look me in the eyes, and say,
815
00:35:32,521 --> 00:35:35,742
"I'm a fucking junkie."
816
00:35:35,742 --> 00:35:37,135
Say it!
817
00:35:41,226 --> 00:35:42,923
I'm a fucking junkie.
818
00:35:47,101 --> 00:35:48,146
Good girl.
819
00:35:50,670 --> 00:35:52,106
Beth, I got these tequilas.
820
00:35:53,412 --> 00:35:55,718
I'm sorry
for raising my voice.
821
00:35:55,718 --> 00:35:56,893
We're just catching up.
822
00:35:57,503 --> 00:35:59,157
Allie, this is Beth.
823
00:35:59,157 --> 00:36:01,202
She's divine. She's the best.
824
00:36:01,202 --> 00:36:03,422
[soft music playing]
825
00:36:08,601 --> 00:36:09,950
That's not Oxy.
826
00:36:10,690 --> 00:36:11,908
Same shit.
827
00:36:24,921 --> 00:36:26,967
[coughs hoarsely]
828
00:36:27,837 --> 00:36:28,838
[inhales sharply]
829
00:36:31,145 --> 00:36:32,277
[exhales]
830
00:36:32,277 --> 00:36:34,322
[breathing heavily]
831
00:36:37,325 --> 00:36:38,848
[vomits]
832
00:36:38,848 --> 00:36:40,328
[groaning]
833
00:36:51,165 --> 00:36:52,340
Thank you.
Ooh, she just walked in.
834
00:36:53,646 --> 00:36:55,125
Oh, my God.
I was so worried about you.
835
00:36:55,125 --> 00:36:56,214
Where were you?
836
00:36:56,214 --> 00:36:59,217
- I'm so sorry.
- Oh, babe, oh.
837
00:36:59,217 --> 00:37:01,131
- I'm sorry.
- Uh-huh. No...
838
00:37:01,131 --> 00:37:02,829
I need help.
839
00:37:02,829 --> 00:37:04,178
I know. I never should have
840
00:37:04,178 --> 00:37:05,658
flushed those pills
down the toilet.
841
00:37:05,658 --> 00:37:08,182
I had no right. I'm so sorry.
I was just so worried.
842
00:37:08,182 --> 00:37:09,401
Can you help me, please, Mama?
843
00:37:09,401 --> 00:37:11,185
Yes, yes, I already did.
844
00:37:11,185 --> 00:37:13,231
Here, I got these from Linda.
845
00:37:13,231 --> 00:37:14,841
She's the woman
who works next to me
846
00:37:14,841 --> 00:37:16,495
in the toy kiosk at the mall.
847
00:37:16,495 --> 00:37:17,974
Her doctor gave them to her
848
00:37:17,974 --> 00:37:19,759
after she got punched
in the face by a shoplifter,
849
00:37:19,759 --> 00:37:20,977
but she said
she didn't need them.
850
00:37:20,977 --> 00:37:22,283
She swore by the neck brace.
851
00:37:22,283 --> 00:37:24,067
But you need 'em, honey.
So here.
852
00:37:24,067 --> 00:37:26,722
That right there is a gift
from Linda, okay?
853
00:37:26,722 --> 00:37:28,289
And we can worry
about kicking it later.
854
00:37:28,289 --> 00:37:29,725
Let's not rush things.
855
00:37:29,725 --> 00:37:31,945
What matters the most
is that you're home safe.
856
00:37:31,945 --> 00:37:35,122
Oh, babe. [kisses]
Oh, my baby.
857
00:37:39,735 --> 00:37:41,259
Hey, Ry?
858
00:37:41,259 --> 00:37:42,869
[muffled music playing
on speaker]
859
00:37:42,869 --> 00:37:44,784
Got Chinese food!
860
00:37:45,698 --> 00:37:48,222
I got sweet and sour chicken,
861
00:37:48,222 --> 00:37:51,007
beef with broccoli,
steamed rice.
862
00:37:51,747 --> 00:37:52,705
Where are ya?
863
00:37:53,358 --> 00:37:54,663
Hey, Ry?
864
00:37:55,925 --> 00:37:57,057
Ryan!
865
00:37:57,057 --> 00:37:58,711
[hip-hop music playing
on speaker]
866
00:37:58,711 --> 00:38:01,148
[gasps] What the...
Daniel, get out!
867
00:38:01,148 --> 00:38:02,454
- [boy whimpering]
- Hey. Hey!
868
00:38:02,454 --> 00:38:04,151
[boy] Okay. Whoa, whoa! Okay.
869
00:38:04,151 --> 00:38:06,240
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Calm down!
It's not what you think.
870
00:38:06,240 --> 00:38:08,503
I'm pretty sure it is
what I think. How old are you?
871
00:38:08,503 --> 00:38:09,678
Daniel! Get off of him.
872
00:38:09,678 --> 00:38:11,027
Shut up!
873
00:38:11,027 --> 00:38:12,638
I asked you a question, boy.
How old are you?
874
00:38:12,638 --> 00:38:14,988
- I'm 20.
- She's 16, and I'm an ex-cop.
875
00:38:14,988 --> 00:38:16,555
Looks like you picked
the wrong girl.
876
00:38:16,555 --> 00:38:17,773
You're choking him!
877
00:38:17,773 --> 00:38:19,601
She said she was 18 online.
878
00:38:19,601 --> 00:38:22,300
If I ever catch you
near my granddaughter again,
879
00:38:22,300 --> 00:38:23,953
I'm gonna rip
your fucking dick off
880
00:38:23,953 --> 00:38:25,564
and shove it down your throat.
You feel me?
881
00:38:25,564 --> 00:38:27,217
[gasping] Yes, sir. Yes.
882
00:38:27,217 --> 00:38:29,002
Get the fuck out of here.
883
00:38:29,002 --> 00:38:31,439
Yes, sir.
Uh, I need my clothes.
884
00:38:31,439 --> 00:38:34,137
They're in my house.
They're my clothes now.
885
00:38:34,137 --> 00:38:35,313
Run away!
886
00:38:37,706 --> 00:38:38,838
[Ryan] Daniel!
887
00:38:38,838 --> 00:38:40,883
Get out of my fucking room!
888
00:38:40,883 --> 00:38:42,232
What the fuck?
889
00:38:42,232 --> 00:38:44,234
[loudly] Hey, look, everybody!
890
00:38:44,234 --> 00:38:46,715
Statutory rapist
from Williamsburg!
891
00:38:46,715 --> 00:38:47,934
I need my keys!
892
00:38:47,934 --> 00:38:51,285
Oh, his keys! His keys!
Look at him!
893
00:38:51,285 --> 00:38:54,636
He's scrambling to his car!
Statutory rapist!
894
00:38:54,636 --> 00:38:55,855
Hey, Belinda,
895
00:38:55,855 --> 00:38:58,379
I found this fool in bed
with my Ryan.
896
00:38:58,379 --> 00:39:00,250
She said...
She said she was 18 online.
897
00:39:00,250 --> 00:39:01,687
You're a fuckboy.
898
00:39:01,687 --> 00:39:03,950
He's a fuckboy! That's what
the kids call them!
899
00:39:03,950 --> 00:39:06,518
Get out of
our neighborhood, fuckboy!
900
00:39:06,518 --> 00:39:08,084
[grunting] Okay. Okay!
901
00:39:08,084 --> 00:39:09,172
[Belinda]
Get out of here, fuckboy!
902
00:39:09,172 --> 00:39:10,260
All right! All right!
903
00:39:10,260 --> 00:39:11,523
Right fucking now!
904
00:39:11,523 --> 00:39:13,612
- Wet, flaccid fuckboy!
- [boy] Okay, okay!
905
00:39:13,612 --> 00:39:14,700
Okay!
906
00:39:17,920 --> 00:39:19,966
I cannot believe
you just did that!
907
00:39:19,966 --> 00:39:21,054
Give me your phone.
908
00:39:22,403 --> 00:39:24,144
Give me the fucking phone
right now!
909
00:39:29,192 --> 00:39:30,672
You're grounded.
910
00:39:30,672 --> 00:39:33,936
You hear me?
You're grounded until...
911
00:39:33,936 --> 00:39:37,070
Shit, I can't think of
when you won't be grounded.
912
00:39:37,070 --> 00:39:38,898
You can't just lock me up, Daniel.
913
00:39:38,898 --> 00:39:41,857
For the last
fucking time, Ryan,
914
00:39:41,857 --> 00:39:43,903
you call me "Grandpa."
915
00:39:43,903 --> 00:39:44,904
[door slams]
916
00:39:46,645 --> 00:39:50,431
[Ryan crying] I hate you!
I fucking hate you!
917
00:39:50,431 --> 00:39:52,694
[unnerving music playing]
918
00:39:58,787 --> 00:40:00,398
[breathing shakily]
919
00:41:00,066 --> 00:41:02,808
["To the Mountains" playing]
920
00:41:06,115 --> 00:41:09,945
♪ Oh, I'm headed
to the mountains ♪
921
00:41:12,208 --> 00:41:15,690
♪ I'll be back
in a week or two ♪
922
00:41:17,518 --> 00:41:19,781
♪ Don't you try to reach me ♪
923
00:41:19,781 --> 00:41:22,523
♪ 'Cause I won't
pick up for you ♪
924
00:41:25,787 --> 00:41:28,442
♪ I've got some things
I neeed to do ♪
925
00:41:43,718 --> 00:41:47,940
♪ Oh, I'm headed
to the mountains ♪
926
00:41:49,942 --> 00:41:52,901
♪ The only place
I feel at peace ♪
927
00:41:55,513 --> 00:41:57,993
♪ And I knew
you'd come after me ♪
928
00:41:57,993 --> 00:41:59,168
♪ So I threw away
your keys... ♪
929
00:41:59,168 --> 00:42:00,735
[indistinct chatter]
930
00:42:02,432 --> 00:42:08,917
♪ But I know you'd never go
when I say leave ♪
931
00:42:08,917 --> 00:42:14,053
♪ I'm headed to the mountains
don't wait up for me ♪
932
00:42:14,053 --> 00:42:16,490
[Allison breathing heavily]
933
00:42:23,845 --> 00:42:25,543
Allison, don't go.
934
00:42:27,283 --> 00:42:30,591
- This was a mistake.
- No. No, it isn't.
935
00:42:30,591 --> 00:42:34,595
Trust me, I know
how hard it is to get here.
936
00:42:34,595 --> 00:42:37,555
It's damn near impossible,
and you did it.
937
00:42:37,555 --> 00:42:39,687
Don't run away now
because of me.
938
00:42:39,687 --> 00:42:40,949
There are thousands
of meetings.
939
00:42:40,949 --> 00:42:42,560
- I'll find another one.
- Well, yeah,
940
00:42:42,560 --> 00:42:44,300
but this one
has the best snacks.
941
00:42:44,300 --> 00:42:45,954
- I wanna go.
- No.
942
00:42:45,954 --> 00:42:48,478
No, no. You've made it
this far, and I wouldn't.
943
00:42:48,478 --> 00:42:50,655
I don't wanna be here.
944
00:42:50,655 --> 00:42:52,221
Nobody does in the beginning.
945
00:42:52,221 --> 00:42:54,659
[tearfully]
I don't wanna be anywhere.
946
00:42:54,659 --> 00:42:57,313
Then you are definitely
in the right spot.
947
00:42:58,401 --> 00:42:59,751
I thought you were sober.
948
00:43:00,534 --> 00:43:01,927
Ten years.
949
00:43:01,927 --> 00:43:05,670
I kinda slacked off
coming to regular meetings,
950
00:43:05,670 --> 00:43:07,410
and then lately, I...
951
00:43:08,455 --> 00:43:10,457
I realized I need the support.
952
00:43:11,458 --> 00:43:12,677
Because of what happened?
953
00:43:12,677 --> 00:43:15,810
No, no, no! No, it's...
954
00:43:15,810 --> 00:43:17,377
Is the accident the reason
why you came back?
955
00:43:17,377 --> 00:43:18,813
No, I just feel that...
956
00:43:18,813 --> 00:43:20,554
Daniel, am I the reason
why you're back here?
957
00:43:20,554 --> 00:43:21,686
Yes!
958
00:43:25,646 --> 00:43:26,995
Yes, of course.
959
00:43:29,041 --> 00:43:30,564
What the hell
do you want me to say?
960
00:43:31,434 --> 00:43:33,349
- I'm sorry.
- No.
961
00:43:33,349 --> 00:43:35,264
Look.
962
00:43:35,264 --> 00:43:39,704
I got ten years,
and lately, I've been feeling
963
00:43:39,704 --> 00:43:43,229
like I really,
really want a drink.
964
00:43:45,057 --> 00:43:46,406
This works.
965
00:43:48,669 --> 00:43:49,757
Thank you.
966
00:43:49,757 --> 00:43:52,804
Um, I'm gonna find
somewhere else.
967
00:43:52,804 --> 00:43:54,588
There are thousands
of these meetings.
968
00:43:54,588 --> 00:43:57,852
Yeah, but somehow you found
your way to this one.
969
00:43:59,462 --> 00:44:00,855
Now isn't that something?
970
00:44:03,771 --> 00:44:05,381
All right, come on.
971
00:44:09,995 --> 00:44:11,126
Come on.
972
00:44:13,215 --> 00:44:14,260
Okay.
973
00:44:15,827 --> 00:44:17,829
[woman] Everybody, welcome.
974
00:44:17,829 --> 00:44:19,352
This is the regular meeting
975
00:44:19,352 --> 00:44:22,050
of the Live and Let Live group
of Alcoholics Anonymous.
976
00:44:22,050 --> 00:44:23,356
My name is Simone,
977
00:44:23,356 --> 00:44:26,141
and I'm an alcoholic,
and your secretary.
978
00:44:26,141 --> 00:44:29,057
Let us open the meeting
with the Serenity Prayer.
979
00:44:31,233 --> 00:44:32,365
God...
980
00:44:32,365 --> 00:44:33,540
[all] ...grant me the serenity
981
00:44:33,540 --> 00:44:36,064
to accept the things
I cannot change,
982
00:44:36,064 --> 00:44:38,719
the courage
to change the things I can,
983
00:44:38,719 --> 00:44:41,766
and the wisdom
to know the difference.
984
00:44:47,554 --> 00:44:51,210
Hey, you got up awfully early
this morning.
985
00:44:51,210 --> 00:44:53,212
I went to an NA meeting.
986
00:44:53,212 --> 00:44:55,954
- [gasps] What? You did?
- Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.
987
00:44:55,954 --> 00:44:59,697
Oh, Allie.
I'm so happy to hear that.
988
00:44:59,697 --> 00:45:02,047
[Allison] Well, I'm not saying
I'm gonna go again.
989
00:45:02,047 --> 00:45:04,353
Well, you gotta start somewhere,
990
00:45:04,353 --> 00:45:05,920
and sounds like you did.
991
00:45:05,920 --> 00:45:07,487
- Mm-hmm.
- So that's good.
992
00:45:07,487 --> 00:45:12,100
I don't know if I'll be able
to just quit, though, Mom.
993
00:45:12,100 --> 00:45:14,189
I think I need real help,
994
00:45:14,189 --> 00:45:16,801
like an in-patient program
or something.
995
00:45:16,801 --> 00:45:18,672
Well, honey,
neither of us has insurance,
996
00:45:18,672 --> 00:45:21,370
so how the hell are we
supposed to pay for that?
997
00:45:21,370 --> 00:45:22,937
I mean, you gotta get a job.
998
00:45:22,937 --> 00:45:25,723
Mom, who's gonna hire me
like this?
999
00:45:25,723 --> 00:45:27,812
- Come on.
- Like, no...
1000
00:45:27,812 --> 00:45:28,987
What do you mean?
1001
00:45:28,987 --> 00:45:30,684
You're a beautiful
26-year-old woman.
1002
00:45:30,684 --> 00:45:33,382
- You're smart, you're funny...
- No, I'm not. No, I'm not.
1003
00:45:33,382 --> 00:45:35,123
- Yes, you are.
- No, I'm not.
1004
00:45:35,123 --> 00:45:36,864
That's the old me
you're describing.
1005
00:45:36,864 --> 00:45:37,952
You're still you.
1006
00:45:37,952 --> 00:45:40,912
No, I'm not! I'm...
1007
00:45:40,912 --> 00:45:43,218
[sighs] I'm something else.
1008
00:45:45,003 --> 00:45:46,178
I'm something...
1009
00:45:47,222 --> 00:45:48,746
Ugh. Um...
1010
00:45:54,186 --> 00:45:56,231
I was thinking, um...
1011
00:45:59,800 --> 00:46:03,456
You know how Dad was probably
gonna get me a wedding gift,
1012
00:46:03,456 --> 00:46:05,763
or, well, at least
he was gonna come, right?
1013
00:46:05,763 --> 00:46:07,634
Maybe instead
of whatever it was
1014
00:46:07,634 --> 00:46:09,462
that he was gonna give me,
1015
00:46:10,985 --> 00:46:15,337
maybe he could help pay
for me to get help.
1016
00:46:15,337 --> 00:46:17,775
And so, I was wondering if you
1017
00:46:18,471 --> 00:46:20,081
would call him for me.
1018
00:46:20,081 --> 00:46:23,389
Allie, I will never speak
to that man as long as I live.
1019
00:46:23,389 --> 00:46:24,869
Do you know what he did?
1020
00:46:24,869 --> 00:46:27,523
He packed his car up,
and he left us with nothing.
1021
00:46:27,523 --> 00:46:29,525
But it is what it is, okay?
1022
00:46:29,525 --> 00:46:32,964
So, you gotta pull yourself up
by your bootstraps, now.
1023
00:46:34,574 --> 00:46:35,793
Thanks, Mom.
1024
00:46:35,793 --> 00:46:37,577
Yeah, I'm sorry
I can't get over this
1025
00:46:37,577 --> 00:46:39,405
as fast as you want me to.
1026
00:46:39,405 --> 00:46:41,015
- Allie...
- Nah.
1027
00:46:42,060 --> 00:46:44,323
[somber music playing]
1028
00:46:52,157 --> 00:46:53,811
[Daniel] Well, look who it is.
1029
00:46:54,550 --> 00:46:56,857
Hi, Dad.
1030
00:46:56,857 --> 00:47:00,034
What brings you to the less
glamorous side of the river?
1031
00:47:00,034 --> 00:47:02,428
Ryan asked me to come see her.
1032
00:47:02,428 --> 00:47:05,083
Turns out, she really
wanted me to talk to you.
1033
00:47:05,083 --> 00:47:07,433
- Oh?
- She's worried about you.
1034
00:47:07,433 --> 00:47:09,130
She's worried about me?
1035
00:47:10,131 --> 00:47:12,003
That girl's crazy.
1036
00:47:12,003 --> 00:47:14,919
She says she thinks
you need a friend.
1037
00:47:14,919 --> 00:47:16,703
Hell, I don't need a friend.
1038
00:47:16,703 --> 00:47:18,879
I need a dog crate
the size of a teenager.
1039
00:47:22,317 --> 00:47:24,450
Look, Nathan,
I understand your need
1040
00:47:24,450 --> 00:47:26,408
to move on
after the breakup...
1041
00:47:28,846 --> 00:47:29,890
but, hell, I never imagined
1042
00:47:29,890 --> 00:47:32,806
I'd be doing this
all by myself.
1043
00:47:32,806 --> 00:47:34,460
You raised two kids.
1044
00:47:34,460 --> 00:47:35,722
I had your mother.
1045
00:47:37,550 --> 00:47:40,161
And you and your sister were
much better behaved than Ry.
1046
00:47:40,770 --> 00:47:41,771
[Nathan scoffs]
1047
00:47:42,903 --> 00:47:45,340
What? Come on.
Speak your mind, son.
1048
00:47:45,340 --> 00:47:48,256
We were good because
we were terrified of you.
1049
00:47:49,954 --> 00:47:51,738
So, I'm not surprised
1050
00:47:51,738 --> 00:47:53,174
you don't have any tools
in your arsenal
1051
00:47:53,174 --> 00:47:55,394
since you lost
the only one that you had.
1052
00:47:55,394 --> 00:47:56,874
Fear.
1053
00:47:59,877 --> 00:48:05,447
I have apologized 100 times
to you for the way I was.
1054
00:48:07,972 --> 00:48:11,497
Your sister found a way
to give me another chance.
1055
00:48:11,497 --> 00:48:13,151
How come you can't?
1056
00:48:13,151 --> 00:48:16,632
'Cause Molly never really got
the brunt of it, did she?
1057
00:48:16,632 --> 00:48:19,679
I guarantee you that if
she was standing here now,
1058
00:48:19,679 --> 00:48:22,290
she would be begging you
to drop this shit,
1059
00:48:22,290 --> 00:48:23,857
and help me raise her child.
1060
00:48:23,857 --> 00:48:25,380
Well, she isn't.
1061
00:48:27,295 --> 00:48:28,775
No, she's not.
1062
00:48:32,822 --> 00:48:34,563
I have to catch the train.
1063
00:48:35,738 --> 00:48:37,175
I saw Allison.
1064
00:48:41,657 --> 00:48:42,789
Where?
1065
00:48:42,789 --> 00:48:44,878
Not supposed to say.
1066
00:48:45,966 --> 00:48:47,533
AA?
1067
00:48:47,533 --> 00:48:48,751
Not supposed to say.
1068
00:48:48,751 --> 00:48:50,101
What the hell
does she need AA for?
1069
00:48:50,101 --> 00:48:51,885
- I'm not supposed to...
- To say.
1070
00:48:54,366 --> 00:48:55,367
I got it.
1071
00:48:57,108 --> 00:48:59,458
Of all the meetings,
she ends up at yours?
1072
00:48:59,458 --> 00:49:01,982
She saw me,
she tried to run away,
1073
00:49:01,982 --> 00:49:04,202
but I pulled her back.
1074
00:49:04,202 --> 00:49:05,420
Why?
1075
00:49:06,595 --> 00:49:07,814
She's suffering, Nathan.
1076
00:49:09,381 --> 00:49:10,425
Broken.
1077
00:49:11,296 --> 00:49:12,384
Lost.
1078
00:49:12,384 --> 00:49:14,777
You're the one who blamed her!
1079
00:49:15,909 --> 00:49:17,302
I stood by her!
1080
00:49:17,302 --> 00:49:20,566
Yeah, until she left your ass.
1081
00:49:20,566 --> 00:49:24,048
Sorry. Sorry, that came out
harsher than I meant.
1082
00:49:24,048 --> 00:49:26,093
I have to catch the train.
1083
00:49:26,093 --> 00:49:27,442
[Daniel] Please, Nathan.
1084
00:49:28,269 --> 00:49:30,445
I need help.
1085
00:49:30,445 --> 00:49:33,231
Ryan asked me to come by
and say "hi" to you.
1086
00:49:34,275 --> 00:49:35,537
And I did.
1087
00:49:36,886 --> 00:49:37,887
Okay.
1088
00:49:40,586 --> 00:49:41,674
Hi.
1089
00:49:53,512 --> 00:49:55,688
[playing classical music]
1090
00:50:00,823 --> 00:50:03,435
- Best first date ever.
- I heard that.
1091
00:50:09,745 --> 00:50:11,008
[Allison laughing]
1092
00:50:17,449 --> 00:50:20,321
[Daniel] I used to drink
whiskey until I blacked out.
1093
00:50:21,757 --> 00:50:23,846
Wake up the next morning
to find out
1094
00:50:25,022 --> 00:50:27,285
what I had done,
who I had been.
1095
00:50:29,852 --> 00:50:30,940
[chuckles]
1096
00:50:33,204 --> 00:50:34,988
My father was a drunk.
1097
00:50:37,904 --> 00:50:42,039
He beat me
right up to the day he died.
1098
00:50:44,563 --> 00:50:48,045
And I vowed I would never
lay a hand on my children.
1099
00:50:50,351 --> 00:50:51,700
And I didn't...
1100
00:50:53,746 --> 00:50:55,269
while I was sober.
1101
00:50:58,185 --> 00:50:59,795
But in the blackness...
1102
00:51:03,582 --> 00:51:07,325
I always denied because
I really couldn't remember.
1103
00:51:09,066 --> 00:51:10,893
Sometimes there'd be a bruise.
1104
00:51:12,982 --> 00:51:16,377
"Oh, you must have
fallen down.
1105
00:51:16,377 --> 00:51:18,466
"I'm your daddy.
I would never hurt you."
1106
00:51:20,033 --> 00:51:22,557
August 11th, '99...
1107
00:51:25,865 --> 00:51:30,304
I woke up on my front porch to
the sound of church bells...
1108
00:51:33,220 --> 00:51:34,917
and an ice cream truck.
1109
00:51:35,962 --> 00:51:38,051
So, I knew it was Sunday.
1110
00:51:38,051 --> 00:51:42,229
First thing
I saw was my captain
1111
00:51:43,491 --> 00:51:46,015
standing over me,
1112
00:51:46,015 --> 00:51:48,627
poking me in the ribs
with his nightstick.
1113
00:51:51,934 --> 00:51:53,284
An ambulance.
1114
00:51:55,112 --> 00:51:58,854
My son, Nathan,
sitting in the back,
1115
00:52:00,247 --> 00:52:01,683
bleeding from the head.
1116
00:52:03,120 --> 00:52:05,731
Medics had bought him
a popsicle.
1117
00:52:08,037 --> 00:52:09,909
Turns out that... [sighs]
1118
00:52:11,911 --> 00:52:13,739
in the blackness...
1119
00:52:17,308 --> 00:52:20,441
I had beat him so bad
1120
00:52:20,441 --> 00:52:23,662
that he lost the hearing
in his right ear.
1121
00:52:23,662 --> 00:52:24,750
Forever.
1122
00:52:26,186 --> 00:52:29,494
And to this day,
every time I see him,
1123
00:52:29,494 --> 00:52:33,019
I beg for his forgiveness.
1124
00:52:34,455 --> 00:52:36,501
It's just a little dance
we do.
1125
00:52:37,806 --> 00:52:39,417
A mere formality.
1126
00:52:41,419 --> 00:52:43,029
Because we both know...
1127
00:52:45,858 --> 00:52:48,382
that there are some things
that are just
1128
00:52:50,036 --> 00:52:51,994
impossible to forgive.
1129
00:52:56,216 --> 00:53:01,221
I do believe
even God knows that.
1130
00:53:08,576 --> 00:53:11,013
When I was a cop,
I used to eat here every day.
1131
00:53:11,971 --> 00:53:13,668
Free coffee refills.
1132
00:53:16,497 --> 00:53:17,498
You hungry?
1133
00:53:19,196 --> 00:53:20,197
No.
1134
00:53:20,936 --> 00:53:21,937
[Daniel] Hmm.
1135
00:53:24,418 --> 00:53:26,638
Funny, the things
we stop caring about.
1136
00:53:28,727 --> 00:53:30,424
I used to want to travel.
1137
00:53:32,078 --> 00:53:34,298
I would leaf through
National Geographic
1138
00:53:34,298 --> 00:53:36,300
and dog-ear
all of the exotic places
1139
00:53:36,300 --> 00:53:38,606
I would visit once I retired.
1140
00:53:41,392 --> 00:53:43,394
Never do that now.
1141
00:53:43,394 --> 00:53:46,135
- You still could.
- No, no. I couldn't.
1142
00:53:51,228 --> 00:53:56,885
I wasn't drunk,
or on anything, by the way.
1143
00:53:57,669 --> 00:53:58,670
What?
1144
00:53:59,932 --> 00:54:02,369
When I saw you the other day
at the meeting,
1145
00:54:04,066 --> 00:54:08,201
I instantly got worried
that you may have thought
1146
00:54:08,201 --> 00:54:11,378
that I was drinking
or on drugs
1147
00:54:11,378 --> 00:54:13,075
on the day of the accident,
and I wasn't.
1148
00:54:13,075 --> 00:54:15,513
I was sober.
It wasn't my fault.
1149
00:54:17,254 --> 00:54:19,517
I have every report
ever written
1150
00:54:19,517 --> 00:54:21,301
committed to memory.
1151
00:54:21,954 --> 00:54:23,042
Right.
1152
00:54:25,349 --> 00:54:26,611
So, you know that it was
1153
00:54:26,611 --> 00:54:28,352
the backhoe guy's fault, Alvarez.
1154
00:54:28,352 --> 00:54:30,049
I don't wanna get
into that all right now.
1155
00:54:30,049 --> 00:54:31,572
Okay, yeah, you're right.
1156
00:54:36,534 --> 00:54:39,232
Nathan said that he was deaf
since birth.
1157
00:54:40,581 --> 00:54:41,930
He never told you?
1158
00:54:43,323 --> 00:54:45,499
Maybe he wanted me
to like you.
1159
00:54:47,066 --> 00:54:48,720
I doubt that.
1160
00:54:52,376 --> 00:54:56,467
I thought that raising Ryan
would offer me the chance
1161
00:54:56,467 --> 00:54:59,121
to be a better father
than I ever was.
1162
00:54:59,992 --> 00:55:01,733
Shit.
1163
00:55:01,733 --> 00:55:04,692
I'm in way over my head.
1164
00:55:04,692 --> 00:55:07,956
I got one of those audiobooks
from the library.
1165
00:55:07,956 --> 00:55:09,218
How to Talk to a Teen.
1166
00:55:09,218 --> 00:55:11,177
[chuckles] Oh, yeah?
1167
00:55:11,177 --> 00:55:12,831
How's that working out?
1168
00:55:12,831 --> 00:55:15,442
- Well, it's from the '80s...
- [laughs]
1169
00:55:15,442 --> 00:55:16,791
It's on a cassette.
1170
00:55:16,791 --> 00:55:17,879
Right.
1171
00:55:17,879 --> 00:55:19,490
Its advice is,
1172
00:55:20,839 --> 00:55:22,319
"Chaperone a dance."
1173
00:55:22,797 --> 00:55:24,451
[laughs]
1174
00:55:26,061 --> 00:55:28,325
"Chaperone a dance."
1175
00:55:28,325 --> 00:55:30,239
I just caught her having sex
1176
00:55:30,239 --> 00:55:32,503
with a boy
who looked like a man.
1177
00:55:34,896 --> 00:55:36,768
A dance would be delightful.
1178
00:55:38,160 --> 00:55:40,119
Can I give you some advice
1179
00:55:41,120 --> 00:55:43,122
from a former teenage girl?
1180
00:55:44,906 --> 00:55:46,386
She's gonna have sex.
1181
00:55:47,822 --> 00:55:50,782
And nothing you say
is gonna change that.
1182
00:55:53,262 --> 00:55:55,439
Just make sure
she's on birth control.
1183
00:55:55,439 --> 00:55:56,657
- Birth control?
- Yeah.
1184
00:55:56,657 --> 00:55:59,094
She's 16!
1185
00:55:59,094 --> 00:56:01,314
No, we'll be going
the abstinence route.
1186
00:56:02,402 --> 00:56:03,708
No offense, Daniel,
1187
00:56:03,708 --> 00:56:06,493
but, uh, there's a knot
in your logic.
1188
00:56:07,973 --> 00:56:09,366
You're trying to solve
a problem
1189
00:56:09,366 --> 00:56:11,193
by looking
in the other direction.
1190
00:56:14,632 --> 00:56:16,590
I could talk to her
if you want me to.
1191
00:56:16,590 --> 00:56:18,549
Oh, well, no thanks.
1192
00:56:18,549 --> 00:56:20,159
- It's okay. Of course.
- That's not appropriate.
1193
00:56:20,159 --> 00:56:21,595
I don't even know
why I just said that.
1194
00:56:21,595 --> 00:56:22,857
- I'm sorry.
- No, it's okay.
1195
00:56:22,857 --> 00:56:24,381
It's just that
I don't think that it's...
1196
00:56:24,381 --> 00:56:25,947
I just felt the need,
1197
00:56:27,427 --> 00:56:30,387
um, the instinct
to help in some way.
1198
00:56:31,344 --> 00:56:32,867
It's the least I could do.
1199
00:56:40,440 --> 00:56:42,355
I don't know how to do this.
1200
00:56:43,356 --> 00:56:44,313
What?
1201
00:56:44,836 --> 00:56:46,359
Start all over.
1202
00:56:48,143 --> 00:56:49,493
How do you do it?
1203
00:56:50,755 --> 00:56:52,147
[Daniel] Takes work.
1204
00:56:55,150 --> 00:56:58,110
- Can I tell you a secret?
- Sure.
1205
00:57:03,115 --> 00:57:05,334
I'm not sure I have the will.
1206
00:57:27,487 --> 00:57:30,011
What does "amor fati" mean?
1207
00:57:31,578 --> 00:57:32,666
[Daniel sighs]
1208
00:57:33,928 --> 00:57:35,539
Certain things are private.
1209
00:57:36,714 --> 00:57:38,542
Do you think I'm fucked up?
1210
00:57:39,978 --> 00:57:42,023
Are you high right now?
1211
00:57:43,329 --> 00:57:44,461
No.
1212
00:57:45,853 --> 00:57:47,855
I was a cop for 40 years.
1213
00:57:47,855 --> 00:57:49,553
I was an addict for 50.
1214
00:57:51,076 --> 00:57:53,165
So, I'm gonna ask you again.
1215
00:57:54,383 --> 00:57:55,907
Are you high right now?
1216
00:57:56,908 --> 00:57:58,126
Well, I...
1217
00:57:59,954 --> 00:58:01,608
I broke a pill in half.
1218
00:58:01,608 --> 00:58:03,044
So, half.
1219
00:58:04,872 --> 00:58:07,309
Yes, I think
you're fucked up, Allison.
1220
00:58:10,225 --> 00:58:11,531
Not half.
1221
00:58:12,401 --> 00:58:14,273
All fucked up.
1222
00:58:14,273 --> 00:58:16,188
Do you think
I'll ever pull out of this?
1223
00:58:18,016 --> 00:58:23,325
I mean, like, maybe one day
I might be the kind of person
1224
00:58:24,762 --> 00:58:26,241
that people want
their granddaughter
1225
00:58:26,241 --> 00:58:28,287
to hang out with?
1226
00:58:28,287 --> 00:58:29,984
I have no idea.
1227
00:58:31,769 --> 00:58:33,031
Me neither.
1228
00:58:35,860 --> 00:58:38,210
[soft country music playing]
1229
00:58:48,350 --> 00:58:51,353
Can I have
my phone back, please?
1230
00:58:51,353 --> 00:58:54,182
I'm running out of ideas
on how to handle you, Ryan.
1231
00:58:55,270 --> 00:58:56,837
Grandpa,
everybody at my age has sex.
1232
00:58:56,837 --> 00:58:58,709
It's, like, not a big deal.
1233
00:58:58,709 --> 00:59:00,101
I know it was different
when you were younger,
1234
00:59:00,101 --> 00:59:02,930
but that's just, like,
not how it is anymore.
1235
00:59:06,891 --> 00:59:09,241
[smacks lips] Well,
let me ask you something.
1236
00:59:15,464 --> 00:59:16,509
Are you...
1237
00:59:19,033 --> 00:59:21,079
Are you using
1238
00:59:21,906 --> 00:59:24,212
any protection?
1239
00:59:24,212 --> 00:59:25,823
Oh, my God!
1240
00:59:25,823 --> 00:59:28,521
I am so not gonna talk about
this with my grandfather.
1241
00:59:28,521 --> 00:59:30,523
How the hell
do you think I feel?
1242
00:59:32,830 --> 00:59:34,571
[both sigh]
1243
00:59:34,571 --> 00:59:37,095
- I know you're upset.
- I'm not upset.
1244
00:59:37,095 --> 00:59:38,357
Maybe you should go back
1245
00:59:39,227 --> 00:59:40,751
and see that therapist again.
1246
00:59:40,751 --> 00:59:42,056
No. I just
1247
00:59:43,188 --> 00:59:45,843
want my phone back.
1248
00:59:45,843 --> 00:59:49,063
I don't have any friends
at Columbia
1249
00:59:49,063 --> 00:59:51,370
and I want to
1250
00:59:51,370 --> 00:59:54,025
hang onto the few I still have
on Long Beach Island.
1251
00:59:55,374 --> 00:59:57,071
How come
you can't make friends?
1252
00:59:57,071 --> 00:59:58,725
I've been through a lot
this year.
1253
00:59:59,247 --> 01:00:00,509
[Daniel] Hmm.
1254
01:00:01,467 --> 01:00:03,948
And nobody really understands.
1255
01:00:05,166 --> 01:00:07,604
They try. Some, but...
1256
01:00:08,561 --> 01:00:10,171
I mean, it's fake.
1257
01:00:10,171 --> 01:00:11,999
Don't you think
most people are so fake?
1258
01:00:13,435 --> 01:00:16,047
I would probably say
"duplicitous."
1259
01:00:17,048 --> 01:00:18,136
What does that mean?
1260
01:00:18,963 --> 01:00:20,486
Fake.
1261
01:00:20,486 --> 01:00:21,618
[chuckles]
1262
01:00:23,576 --> 01:00:24,925
I'm on your side.
1263
01:00:26,884 --> 01:00:27,928
I know.
1264
01:00:28,581 --> 01:00:30,235
Tell you what.
1265
01:00:30,235 --> 01:00:33,107
You can have your phone back
1266
01:00:33,107 --> 01:00:36,981
if you promise to start taking
birth control pills.
1267
01:00:36,981 --> 01:00:38,983
Ugh! Oh, my God! Daniel!
1268
01:00:38,983 --> 01:00:40,114
Grandpa!
1269
01:00:40,985 --> 01:00:41,986
[sighs]
1270
01:00:42,943 --> 01:00:44,031
Grandpa.
1271
01:00:45,467 --> 01:00:48,340
Is it a deal?
I'll make the appointment.
1272
01:00:49,994 --> 01:00:52,257
Fine. Fine.
1273
01:00:52,257 --> 01:00:53,737
I just
1274
01:00:53,737 --> 01:00:56,783
never want to talk to you
about sex ever again.
1275
01:00:58,002 --> 01:01:00,134
Oh, really?
1276
01:01:01,005 --> 01:01:02,789
'Cause I just love this shit.
1277
01:01:09,709 --> 01:01:11,537
Have you ever been
on campus before?
1278
01:01:11,537 --> 01:01:13,234
Not since I was a kid.
1279
01:01:13,234 --> 01:01:14,888
I used to do swim meets here.
1280
01:01:14,888 --> 01:01:16,194
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
1281
01:01:16,194 --> 01:01:18,196
- You were a swimmer?
- [chuckling] Uh, yeah.
1282
01:01:18,196 --> 01:01:20,720
Well, I was 12, but yeah,
I was pretty good.
1283
01:01:20,720 --> 01:01:22,853
I still have all the trophies
and the ribbons.
1284
01:01:22,853 --> 01:01:24,811
- That's cool.
- Mmm.
1285
01:01:24,811 --> 01:01:27,684
- What stroke?
- Mostly freestyle.
1286
01:01:29,076 --> 01:01:30,338
Why'd you stop?
1287
01:01:31,209 --> 01:01:34,429
Um, my dad left.
1288
01:01:34,429 --> 01:01:37,258
Yeah, it was kinda the thing
that we used to do together.
1289
01:01:37,258 --> 01:01:39,696
He would cheer so loud
I could hear him underwater.
1290
01:01:39,696 --> 01:01:41,045
[chuckles]
1291
01:01:41,045 --> 01:01:43,047
Seemed kind of pointless
to do it without him.
1292
01:01:44,396 --> 01:01:46,790
- Where'd he go?
- Ohio.
1293
01:01:48,139 --> 01:01:49,706
Started a whole new family
in Ohio.
1294
01:01:49,706 --> 01:01:51,272
Wow.
1295
01:01:51,272 --> 01:01:54,014
He has 10-year-old twins. Yeah.
1296
01:01:54,014 --> 01:01:56,103
I don't know
if they swim or not, though.
1297
01:01:56,103 --> 01:01:58,671
Oh, man. I am always
just amazed at people
1298
01:01:58,671 --> 01:02:01,239
who can, like, up and leave
their kids like that.
1299
01:02:01,239 --> 01:02:02,370
[Allison] Mmm.
1300
01:02:02,370 --> 01:02:03,720
I just don't know
how you could,
1301
01:02:03,720 --> 01:02:06,810
like, fucking sleep at night.
1302
01:02:06,810 --> 01:02:10,901
For so long, I thought
that I'd done something wrong.
1303
01:02:10,901 --> 01:02:14,339
Like, it was my fault,
or I'd let him down.
1304
01:02:15,514 --> 01:02:18,386
And then I just realized,
1305
01:02:18,386 --> 01:02:21,694
I don't know, maybe
some people just aren't good.
1306
01:02:21,694 --> 01:02:22,826
[Simone] Hmm.
1307
01:02:24,349 --> 01:02:26,655
It's kinda like he, like,
restarted a level
1308
01:02:26,655 --> 01:02:29,093
in a video game
with a fresh life.
1309
01:02:29,093 --> 01:02:31,617
- [both laugh]
- That's exactly what he did!
1310
01:02:31,617 --> 01:02:35,621
He packed up the car,
and left his Rolex
1311
01:02:35,621 --> 01:02:38,276
in the attic of my dollhouse,
1312
01:02:38,276 --> 01:02:39,843
and he drove away.
1313
01:02:43,672 --> 01:02:44,717
Hey, let's sit
for a second, okay?
1314
01:02:44,717 --> 01:02:46,501
- Yeah, yeah.
- [clears throat]
1315
01:02:48,155 --> 01:02:51,768
Uh... So, I'll sponsor you.
1316
01:02:51,768 --> 01:02:54,901
- Okay.
- But, um,
1317
01:02:54,901 --> 01:02:56,816
you gotta start
taking this shit seriously.
1318
01:02:58,296 --> 01:03:00,733
You can't keep coming
to meetings high.
1319
01:03:00,733 --> 01:03:02,169
What? [chuckles]
1320
01:03:04,998 --> 01:03:06,739
How did you know?
1321
01:03:06,739 --> 01:03:08,088
[laughs]
1322
01:03:08,088 --> 01:03:10,874
Uh, because I was you.
1323
01:03:10,874 --> 01:03:13,790
And I've helped
dozens of women who were you.
1324
01:03:15,226 --> 01:03:19,012
And some beat it,
and some are dead.
1325
01:03:21,841 --> 01:03:23,103
But, you know,
1326
01:03:24,278 --> 01:03:26,715
if you want my time,
you gotta commit.
1327
01:03:26,715 --> 01:03:28,021
Because I have a toddler
so I just
1328
01:03:28,021 --> 01:03:29,327
- don't have time for bullshit.
- Yeah.
1329
01:03:29,327 --> 01:03:33,070
No, I do. I... I...
I really wanna beat it.
1330
01:03:33,070 --> 01:03:35,855
Then I want you to do
90 meetings in 90 days.
1331
01:03:35,855 --> 01:03:37,422
- Wow.
- Yeah.
1332
01:03:37,422 --> 01:03:40,251
And, um, we're gonna
get you started on step one.
1333
01:03:41,339 --> 01:03:42,296
Okay.
1334
01:03:43,558 --> 01:03:44,690
Okay.
1335
01:03:44,690 --> 01:03:48,476
Also, enough hiding out, man.
1336
01:03:48,476 --> 01:03:49,738
It's time you shared
with the group.
1337
01:03:51,828 --> 01:03:53,830
- All right.
- Uh...
1338
01:03:56,441 --> 01:04:02,490
[nervously] Hi, I'm Allison,
and I'm addicted to, uh,
1339
01:04:03,883 --> 01:04:05,406
pills.
1340
01:04:05,406 --> 01:04:07,582
[group] Hi, Allison.
1341
01:04:07,582 --> 01:04:08,714
[Allison] Uh...
1342
01:04:10,194 --> 01:04:12,370
Sorry. Can I start again?
1343
01:04:12,370 --> 01:04:14,589
I've never done this before,
and I'm nervous.
1344
01:04:14,589 --> 01:04:15,721
You got it.
1345
01:04:16,896 --> 01:04:18,550
[breathes deeply]
1346
01:04:20,378 --> 01:04:25,426
Hi, I'm Allison,
and I'm an addict.
1347
01:04:25,426 --> 01:04:27,298
[group] Hi, Allison.
1348
01:04:30,475 --> 01:04:31,650
I...
1349
01:04:33,913 --> 01:04:34,871
Um...
1350
01:04:38,048 --> 01:04:39,658
I was the driver
1351
01:04:41,094 --> 01:04:43,096
of a car
1352
01:04:43,096 --> 01:04:44,924
that was in
a really bad accident.
1353
01:04:48,188 --> 01:04:49,581
Two people died.
1354
01:04:53,193 --> 01:04:54,499
The woman was...
1355
01:04:58,242 --> 01:05:01,680
The woman was about to be
my sister-in-law.
1356
01:05:05,640 --> 01:05:08,252
We were on our way to try on
my wedding dresses.
1357
01:05:10,950 --> 01:05:12,604
[shudders]
1358
01:05:12,604 --> 01:05:13,735
And then we weren't.
1359
01:05:15,215 --> 01:05:16,477
It wasn't my fault. [sighs]
1360
01:05:18,131 --> 01:05:21,613
I wasn't on drugs or booze,
or drunk, or anything.
1361
01:05:23,702 --> 01:05:24,877
But, uh...
1362
01:05:35,279 --> 01:05:39,022
[voice breaking]
Surviving that day was, is...
1363
01:05:42,373 --> 01:05:44,288
the most painful thing
1364
01:05:44,288 --> 01:05:46,159
I will ever
have to live through.
1365
01:05:48,727 --> 01:05:51,034
[sniffles] I got hurt, too.
1366
01:05:52,035 --> 01:05:53,775
They put a hole in my head.
1367
01:05:54,820 --> 01:05:56,865
And, um, [sniffles]
1368
01:05:56,865 --> 01:05:58,519
that helped because
at least I had something
1369
01:05:58,519 --> 01:05:59,912
I could blame the pain on.
1370
01:06:02,654 --> 01:06:03,916
But then that healed...
1371
01:06:06,788 --> 01:06:08,225
and I was still hurting.
1372
01:06:10,183 --> 01:06:11,445
And I guess that's why
I didn't realize
1373
01:06:11,445 --> 01:06:13,491
how bad it was because to me...
1374
01:06:13,491 --> 01:06:15,841
[breathes shakily]
1375
01:06:15,841 --> 01:06:17,538
I was still in so much pain.
1376
01:06:17,538 --> 01:06:20,454
- [shuddering]
- [rubbing stomach]
1377
01:06:27,592 --> 01:06:30,856
I was, um, prescribed them
for physical pain,
1378
01:06:30,856 --> 01:06:32,989
and they really helped
with that. They really did.
1379
01:06:37,384 --> 01:06:39,908
But they made me numb.
Blissfully numb.
1380
01:06:45,479 --> 01:06:47,090
Without them I want to die.
1381
01:06:48,743 --> 01:06:50,354
[sniffles] Every day.
1382
01:06:54,097 --> 01:06:56,882
I've never said that
out loud before. [sobs]
1383
01:07:00,059 --> 01:07:01,017
Um...
1384
01:07:03,019 --> 01:07:05,804
I've never really faced
reality without them.
1385
01:07:06,587 --> 01:07:08,154
[sniffling]
1386
01:07:08,154 --> 01:07:10,374
And I don't know if I'll be
able to handle what I see,
1387
01:07:10,374 --> 01:07:13,725
but I'm here to try.
1388
01:07:18,512 --> 01:07:19,905
Okay. That's it. [sniffles]
1389
01:07:21,385 --> 01:07:23,691
That's it. [sighing heavily]
1390
01:07:27,434 --> 01:07:28,609
What happens now?
1391
01:07:30,046 --> 01:07:34,267
[breathing heavily]
1392
01:07:37,096 --> 01:07:39,794
[toy train horn tooting]
1393
01:07:44,930 --> 01:07:46,105
You made all of this?
1394
01:07:47,628 --> 01:07:51,328
Uh, I assembled it
and designed it.
1395
01:07:51,328 --> 01:07:53,069
Yeah.
1396
01:07:53,069 --> 01:07:56,985
You see,
the houses come as a kit.
1397
01:07:56,985 --> 01:07:59,945
You just assemble them
and paint them...
1398
01:07:59,945 --> 01:08:02,382
Schoolhouse,
I built from scratch.
1399
01:08:06,821 --> 01:08:10,216
Hey, there are two kids
making out back here.
1400
01:08:10,216 --> 01:08:11,826
- That's me.
- [chuckles]
1401
01:08:12,958 --> 01:08:14,829
- You were handsome.
- [laughs]
1402
01:08:15,265 --> 01:08:16,309
And tiny.
1403
01:08:17,832 --> 01:08:21,488
Yeah, my very first kiss
behind the schoolhouse.
1404
01:08:23,142 --> 01:08:24,622
Olivia Williams.
1405
01:08:26,493 --> 01:08:28,930
It was fall.
Tip of her nose was cold.
1406
01:08:28,930 --> 01:08:30,193
[chuckles]
1407
01:08:30,193 --> 01:08:32,151
Little runny.
1408
01:08:32,151 --> 01:08:35,415
She stood on tiptoe.
Tasted like bubble gum.
1409
01:08:36,634 --> 01:08:37,591
[Allison] Is that
who you married?
1410
01:08:37,591 --> 01:08:39,593
No! No, no.
1411
01:08:39,593 --> 01:08:43,423
No, she dumped me the next day
for Charlie Cook.
1412
01:08:43,423 --> 01:08:46,731
- Oh.
- He smoked Camels.
1413
01:08:46,731 --> 01:08:50,343
And drove
a Buick Riviera Roadmaster.
1414
01:08:50,343 --> 01:08:52,519
So, is this all inspired
by your life?
1415
01:08:53,303 --> 01:08:54,304
Kinda.
1416
01:08:55,522 --> 01:08:57,133
Supposed to be South Orange.
1417
01:08:58,482 --> 01:08:59,526
I grew up here.
1418
01:09:01,006 --> 01:09:02,616
I was a cop in Newark.
1419
01:09:03,661 --> 01:09:05,010
I've always lived here.
1420
01:09:07,186 --> 01:09:08,187
Who's the soldier?
1421
01:09:09,014 --> 01:09:10,407
[Daniel] That's me.
1422
01:09:10,407 --> 01:09:12,757
Day I got home from Vietnam.
1423
01:09:14,106 --> 01:09:16,587
That other little figure there
is my father.
1424
01:09:16,587 --> 01:09:19,981
He came down to the station
to pick me up.
1425
01:09:19,981 --> 01:09:21,940
- This is incredible.
- Mm.
1426
01:09:23,507 --> 01:09:25,248
How long did it take you?
1427
01:09:25,248 --> 01:09:27,250
Years.
1428
01:09:27,250 --> 01:09:29,426
I started
with a single figure-eight
1429
01:09:30,209 --> 01:09:32,080
and a two-car train.
1430
01:09:32,907 --> 01:09:34,518
I work on it when I can.
1431
01:09:35,562 --> 01:09:37,608
Got more time
now that I've retired.
1432
01:09:38,565 --> 01:09:40,437
My wife passed.
1433
01:09:40,437 --> 01:09:42,743
Ryan used to hang out with me
down here.
1434
01:09:44,049 --> 01:09:46,965
She liked the whistle
and the microphone.
1435
01:09:46,965 --> 01:09:48,314
There's a microphone?
1436
01:09:48,314 --> 01:09:49,750
Right over there.
1437
01:09:49,750 --> 01:09:51,361
How else you gonna tell
your passengers
1438
01:09:51,361 --> 01:09:53,058
- that the train's coming?
- [laughs]
1439
01:09:57,671 --> 01:09:59,543
[toy train horn tooting]
1440
01:09:59,543 --> 01:10:01,588
[chuckles]
1441
01:10:07,638 --> 01:10:09,205
[Allison singing "Take
The Last Train to Clarksville"]
1442
01:10:09,205 --> 01:10:12,643
♪ Take the last train
to Clarksville ♪
1443
01:10:12,643 --> 01:10:15,689
♪ And I'll meet you
at the station ♪
1444
01:10:15,689 --> 01:10:18,562
♪ You can be there by 4:30 ♪
1445
01:10:18,562 --> 01:10:20,651
♪ 'Cause I booked
your reservation ♪
1446
01:10:20,651 --> 01:10:22,479
♪ Don't be slow ♪
1447
01:10:22,479 --> 01:10:24,611
[both singing]
♪ Oh no no no ♪
1448
01:10:24,611 --> 01:10:27,005
♪ Oh no no no ♪
1449
01:10:27,005 --> 01:10:29,312
♪ And I don't know
if I'm ever ♪
1450
01:10:29,312 --> 01:10:31,009
[both sing]
♪ Coming home ♪
1451
01:10:31,009 --> 01:10:32,402
[Daniel laughs]
1452
01:10:32,402 --> 01:10:34,795
That was just a little
serenade for your people
1453
01:10:34,795 --> 01:10:36,362
from the heavens above.
1454
01:10:36,362 --> 01:10:39,583
Think that's one of the
reasons I enjoy it so much.
1455
01:10:39,583 --> 01:10:42,281
Why?
'Cause you get to play God?
1456
01:10:42,281 --> 01:10:45,893
Well, so much of my life
has been outta control.
1457
01:10:48,069 --> 01:10:50,246
Down here,
1458
01:10:50,246 --> 01:10:53,161
I get to decide
if Olivia chooses me.
1459
01:10:55,076 --> 01:10:57,122
I get to decide
if my father comes
1460
01:10:57,122 --> 01:10:59,429
to pick me up at the station
when I get home.
1461
01:11:00,560 --> 01:11:01,866
Did he?
1462
01:11:01,866 --> 01:11:02,954
No.
1463
01:11:05,217 --> 01:11:08,089
He was passed out drunk
in our backyard.
1464
01:11:10,788 --> 01:11:13,399
He'd lain face down so long,
1465
01:11:14,748 --> 01:11:17,316
an inch of snow had gathered
on his back.
1466
01:11:21,407 --> 01:11:23,975
Next morning at breakfast,
he offered me a beer,
1467
01:11:25,629 --> 01:11:26,673
so...
1468
01:11:28,371 --> 01:11:30,590
I had a beer with him
at breakfast,
1469
01:11:32,940 --> 01:11:34,290
and I never stopped.
1470
01:11:39,730 --> 01:11:41,558
When did you last talk
to Nathan?
1471
01:11:46,258 --> 01:11:48,216
Daniel, this is God.
1472
01:11:48,216 --> 01:11:51,437
Allison would like you to
change the conversation now.
1473
01:11:52,917 --> 01:11:54,875
- I'll bet she would.
- [chuckles]
1474
01:11:54,875 --> 01:11:57,313
All right.
Let's get outta here.
1475
01:11:58,226 --> 01:11:59,271
[switch clicks]
1476
01:12:03,144 --> 01:12:05,321
[music playing on headphones]
1477
01:12:08,889 --> 01:12:10,151
[Daniel] Ryan?
1478
01:12:10,151 --> 01:12:12,502
It's only one o'clock.
Why are you home?
1479
01:12:12,502 --> 01:12:14,982
We had a half-day
for the active shooter drill.
1480
01:12:14,982 --> 01:12:17,158
- I told you this morning.
- [Daniel sighs]
1481
01:12:17,158 --> 01:12:20,248
Well, this is a friend of mine
from the program.
1482
01:12:20,248 --> 01:12:21,162
Hi.
1483
01:12:22,425 --> 01:12:24,035
Hi.
1484
01:12:24,035 --> 01:12:25,950
- You should probably get going.
- Yeah. Yeah.
1485
01:12:25,950 --> 01:12:27,821
I'm gonna go.
1486
01:12:27,821 --> 01:12:30,215
Wait, I know you
from somewhere.
1487
01:12:30,215 --> 01:12:31,303
No, you don't.
1488
01:12:31,738 --> 01:12:32,696
You do?
1489
01:12:32,696 --> 01:12:33,653
How do I know you?
1490
01:12:34,306 --> 01:12:36,352
Uh... My... I'm...
1491
01:12:36,352 --> 01:12:37,788
I'm Allison.
1492
01:12:37,788 --> 01:12:39,442
Yeah, I've seen you before.
1493
01:12:39,442 --> 01:12:41,748
I thought you said the active
shooter drill ended at 2:00.
1494
01:12:41,748 --> 01:12:43,968
Yeah, that's when the pretend
shooter fights back.
1495
01:12:43,968 --> 01:12:45,970
Today, he shot himself,
so we got out early.
1496
01:12:47,580 --> 01:12:48,755
Why do I know you?
1497
01:12:48,755 --> 01:12:50,496
I'm not sure
what I'm supposed to say.
1498
01:12:50,496 --> 01:12:52,629
- You were Nathan's fiancee.
- No.
1499
01:12:52,629 --> 01:12:54,282
- You were in the car.
- No.
1500
01:12:54,282 --> 01:12:56,546
- I was, yeah.
- Weren't you driving?
1501
01:12:56,546 --> 01:12:57,547
Wasn't she driving?
1502
01:12:57,547 --> 01:12:59,026
We're in the program together.
1503
01:12:59,026 --> 01:13:01,159
- But I thought you said
it was her fault.
- What?
1504
01:13:01,159 --> 01:13:03,422
How could you bring her
into our house?
1505
01:13:03,422 --> 01:13:04,989
Get out of our fucking house!
1506
01:13:04,989 --> 01:13:06,904
- Okay. It's okay.
- [Daniel] I'm sorry. I...
1507
01:13:06,904 --> 01:13:09,602
I'm so sorry.
I thought you were in school.
1508
01:13:09,602 --> 01:13:11,038
You ruined my fucking life!
1509
01:13:11,038 --> 01:13:14,302
I know, I know, I know.
I'm... I'm really sorry.
1510
01:13:14,302 --> 01:13:17,610
[crying] You shouldn't
be here! This is our house!
1511
01:13:17,610 --> 01:13:18,872
My mom grew up in here!
1512
01:13:18,872 --> 01:13:21,092
I sleep in her bedroom.
I use her sheets!
1513
01:13:21,092 --> 01:13:23,137
[Daniel] All right. All right.
She's leaving.
1514
01:13:23,137 --> 01:13:25,357
Uh, just in case
this is the last time
1515
01:13:25,357 --> 01:13:27,446
I ever get to talk to you,
please know,
1516
01:13:29,187 --> 01:13:31,668
I also wish it was me.
1517
01:13:32,495 --> 01:13:33,757
Okay? I do.
1518
01:13:35,019 --> 01:13:36,324
I'm gonna go.
1519
01:13:36,324 --> 01:13:38,196
[voice breaking]
I never got to say goodbye.
1520
01:13:39,415 --> 01:13:42,113
[Allison sighs] I know.
1521
01:13:45,421 --> 01:13:48,685
They were going to see a play.
1522
01:13:54,342 --> 01:13:55,474
I know.
1523
01:13:57,128 --> 01:13:58,651
She wanted to see a musical,
1524
01:13:58,651 --> 01:14:00,914
because she loved
all the fancy costumes.
1525
01:14:06,050 --> 01:14:07,530
I didn't know that.
1526
01:14:07,530 --> 01:14:10,489
She said you made Nate
really happy.
1527
01:14:10,489 --> 01:14:12,448
That you were the best thing
that ever happened to him.
1528
01:14:13,797 --> 01:14:15,320
He made me happy, too.
1529
01:14:20,151 --> 01:14:22,240
[softly] Okay, I'm gonna go.
1530
01:14:23,197 --> 01:14:24,416
- [door opens]
- Allison.
1531
01:14:27,158 --> 01:14:28,159
Yeah.
1532
01:14:29,595 --> 01:14:31,031
Would you like to stay
for dinner?
1533
01:14:31,902 --> 01:14:33,164
What?
1534
01:14:34,905 --> 01:14:35,732
Uh...
1535
01:14:45,785 --> 01:14:49,136
So, you're an alcoholic, too?
1536
01:14:49,136 --> 01:14:50,486
[chidingly] Ryan.
1537
01:14:50,486 --> 01:14:51,574
Uh, no.
1538
01:14:53,010 --> 01:14:55,752
Alcohol's not exactly
my problem.
1539
01:14:55,752 --> 01:14:57,623
- What is? Meth?
- [Allison snorts]
1540
01:14:57,623 --> 01:14:58,929
Ryan.
1541
01:14:58,929 --> 01:15:02,106
No. Not meth. Um...
1542
01:15:05,196 --> 01:15:07,285
[smacks lips]
Prescription painkillers.
1543
01:15:08,025 --> 01:15:09,200
Oxy.
1544
01:15:09,200 --> 01:15:10,854
How do you know about Oxy?
1545
01:15:10,854 --> 01:15:12,551
Kids at my school snort it.
1546
01:15:12,551 --> 01:15:13,683
It's heroin!
1547
01:15:13,683 --> 01:15:15,032
No, it's not.
1548
01:15:15,032 --> 01:15:16,424
I could get it easier
than I could get a beer.
1549
01:15:16,424 --> 01:15:17,730
They sell it at Rite Aid.
1550
01:15:18,296 --> 01:15:19,515
[Daniel scoffs]
1551
01:15:19,515 --> 01:15:21,342
- So why'd you dump Uncle Nate?
- Ryan.
1552
01:15:21,342 --> 01:15:22,735
[Ryan] He said you ghosted him.
1553
01:15:22,735 --> 01:15:24,041
It's not your business.
1554
01:15:24,041 --> 01:15:26,913
I just don't understand how
1555
01:15:26,913 --> 01:15:28,698
if he was gonna stay with you,
1556
01:15:28,698 --> 01:15:30,787
even after
everything that happened,
1557
01:15:30,787 --> 01:15:31,788
why'd you dump him?
1558
01:15:33,137 --> 01:15:34,355
I was upset.
1559
01:15:38,403 --> 01:15:40,144
And so I ran.
1560
01:15:40,144 --> 01:15:41,841
- Like you, quitting soccer.
- [curtly] Shut up!
1561
01:15:41,841 --> 01:15:43,669
You don't say
"shut up" to me!
1562
01:15:43,669 --> 01:15:44,975
Ever again!
1563
01:15:47,891 --> 01:15:49,632
Why'd you quit soccer?
1564
01:15:49,632 --> 01:15:51,155
- She got into a fight.
- 'Cause I hate every girl
on the team.
1565
01:15:51,155 --> 01:15:52,199
Oh.
1566
01:15:53,897 --> 01:15:55,942
Your parents were telling me
how amazing you were.
1567
01:15:57,509 --> 01:15:59,293
- They were?
- [Allison] Mm-hmm.
1568
01:15:59,293 --> 01:16:01,252
Your dad actually was saying
1569
01:16:01,252 --> 01:16:03,123
how you were definitely
gonna get a scholarship.
1570
01:16:04,995 --> 01:16:06,562
I wanna go to Stanford.
1571
01:16:07,171 --> 01:16:08,912
[Daniel laughing]
1572
01:16:08,912 --> 01:16:10,435
Why are you laughing?
1573
01:16:12,524 --> 01:16:16,223
You quit the team,
you're mouthing off in school,
1574
01:16:16,223 --> 01:16:17,573
and you're not doing
your homework.
1575
01:16:17,573 --> 01:16:19,357
You're gonna get into Stanford?
1576
01:16:19,357 --> 01:16:21,011
I didn't say
I quit the team permanently.
1577
01:16:21,011 --> 01:16:22,969
I said I wanted
to take a break.
1578
01:16:22,969 --> 01:16:24,362
And I had a 4.0 down the shore.
1579
01:16:24,362 --> 01:16:26,494
I could get it back
in a second if I cared.
1580
01:16:26,494 --> 01:16:27,757
Why don't you care?
1581
01:16:27,757 --> 01:16:28,627
Why, do you think?
1582
01:16:30,455 --> 01:16:31,674
- [Daniel] Shit.
- [Allison] Okay.
1583
01:16:31,674 --> 01:16:32,936
Why don't we just
call it a night, okay?
1584
01:16:32,936 --> 01:16:34,241
[Allison] Yeah,
I'm gonna go home.
1585
01:16:39,203 --> 01:16:40,596
Hey, um...
1586
01:16:40,596 --> 01:16:41,771
[tears off page]
1587
01:16:44,034 --> 01:16:47,080
Um, just in case you,
I don't know,
1588
01:16:49,039 --> 01:16:50,475
wanna talk, need to talk...
1589
01:16:51,911 --> 01:16:52,999
This is me.
1590
01:16:52,999 --> 01:16:55,045
And it's up to you,
but I'm here.
1591
01:16:56,350 --> 01:16:57,482
Okay.
1592
01:16:58,091 --> 01:16:59,615
[receding footsteps]
1593
01:17:01,878 --> 01:17:03,619
[Daniel] I'm sorry
about all that.
1594
01:17:03,619 --> 01:17:04,837
[Allison] Uh, it's fine.
1595
01:17:06,665 --> 01:17:08,536
You see what I'm dealing with.
1596
01:17:08,536 --> 01:17:10,060
Honestly, it's okay.
1597
01:17:11,191 --> 01:17:12,410
Look. [sighs]
1598
01:17:13,541 --> 01:17:15,456
She's a very fragile kid.
1599
01:17:16,762 --> 01:17:20,984
So, I'd appreciate it
if you didn't contact her.
1600
01:17:22,899 --> 01:17:23,943
Oh.
1601
01:17:24,596 --> 01:17:25,597
Okay.
1602
01:17:27,120 --> 01:17:29,470
Yeah, I just...
1603
01:17:29,470 --> 01:17:32,691
[stuttering] I just wanted her
to know that I was available
1604
01:17:32,691 --> 01:17:35,172
if she wanted to talk
or anything.
1605
01:17:35,172 --> 01:17:37,304
I'm just asking if you will
1606
01:17:38,262 --> 01:17:39,742
please just let her be.
1607
01:17:40,612 --> 01:17:41,831
Scout's honor.
1608
01:17:41,831 --> 01:17:44,703
No, that's Spock's
"Live long and prosper."
1609
01:17:44,703 --> 01:17:46,357
We Boy Scouts do this.
1610
01:17:46,357 --> 01:17:48,489
Oh. I prefer Spock.
1611
01:17:49,403 --> 01:17:51,405
Live long and prosper, Daniel.
1612
01:17:51,405 --> 01:17:52,493
- [Daniel] Good night.
- Thank you.
1613
01:17:59,762 --> 01:18:02,373
[piano keyboard playing]
1614
01:18:08,422 --> 01:18:09,423
Mmm.
1615
01:18:13,471 --> 01:18:16,300
[humming]
1616
01:18:30,444 --> 01:18:32,969
[resumes playing keyboard]
1617
01:18:32,969 --> 01:18:36,494
[plays descending notes]
1618
01:18:36,494 --> 01:18:37,800
[keys clang]
1619
01:18:50,551 --> 01:18:51,683
[cell phone chimes]
1620
01:18:59,604 --> 01:19:01,432
[indistinct background chatter]
1621
01:19:22,627 --> 01:19:23,671
[chuckles]
1622
01:19:32,855 --> 01:19:34,030
[chuckling]
1623
01:19:42,560 --> 01:19:44,170
[crowd cheering and applauding]
1624
01:19:45,868 --> 01:19:47,913
Go, baby! Go, go, go!
1625
01:19:47,913 --> 01:19:49,306
[quietly] Come on,
come on, come on.
1626
01:19:49,306 --> 01:19:50,698
[woman] Come on!
Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!
1627
01:19:50,698 --> 01:19:52,526
- Yeah!
- [crowd cheers]
1628
01:19:52,526 --> 01:19:53,701
Attagirl!
1629
01:19:54,702 --> 01:19:56,182
Attagirl!
1630
01:19:57,705 --> 01:19:59,533
[cheering continues]
1631
01:20:00,665 --> 01:20:01,797
[mouthing] Thank you.
1632
01:20:06,323 --> 01:20:08,629
[somber music playing]
1633
01:20:14,070 --> 01:20:15,811
[bed creaking]
1634
01:20:15,811 --> 01:20:17,813
[heart beating]
1635
01:20:20,293 --> 01:20:21,817
[breathes heavily]
1636
01:20:24,471 --> 01:20:26,038
[fan creaking softly]
1637
01:20:30,651 --> 01:20:31,870
[cell phone chimes]
1638
01:20:43,926 --> 01:20:45,318
[Ryan] Why do you ride
your bike everywhere?
1639
01:20:45,928 --> 01:20:46,972
Um...
1640
01:20:48,452 --> 01:20:50,497
I haven't been in a car
since the accident.
1641
01:20:51,281 --> 01:20:52,848
'Cause you feel guilty?
1642
01:20:55,328 --> 01:20:56,460
Uh, no.
1643
01:20:57,156 --> 01:21:00,725
Because I feel... scared.
1644
01:21:00,725 --> 01:21:02,248
Daniel says
you were using your phone.
1645
01:21:04,555 --> 01:21:06,470
[Allison] Uh, I was using Maps.
1646
01:21:07,775 --> 01:21:08,864
Everyone uses Maps.
1647
01:21:08,864 --> 01:21:10,735
Yeah, well,
he has all the reports.
1648
01:21:10,735 --> 01:21:11,954
He's memorized them.
1649
01:21:13,172 --> 01:21:15,305
He stares at them at night.
It's weird.
1650
01:21:15,305 --> 01:21:18,308
Okay, well, I was there.
1651
01:21:18,308 --> 01:21:23,095
And the person who wrote
those reports wasn't, so...
1652
01:21:23,095 --> 01:21:25,532
[Ryan] Tell me
why you ended it with Nate.
1653
01:21:25,532 --> 01:21:27,404
My mom would want you guys
to be together still.
1654
01:21:28,622 --> 01:21:30,711
Ryan, I don't even know
what to say to that.
1655
01:21:31,712 --> 01:21:33,627
My mom used to really, um...
1656
01:21:35,891 --> 01:21:38,806
just, like, look out for him
and stuff, you know? Um...
1657
01:21:39,764 --> 01:21:40,808
And...
1658
01:21:42,201 --> 01:21:44,900
I've been thinking
maybe now I'm supposed to.
1659
01:21:45,770 --> 01:21:46,902
Because she can't.
1660
01:21:48,468 --> 01:21:50,949
I bet that would make her
really proud.
1661
01:21:50,949 --> 01:21:52,211
I could tell you
about what's happening
1662
01:21:52,211 --> 01:21:53,256
- with him if you want.
- No, that's okay.
1663
01:21:53,256 --> 01:21:54,605
Thank you, though.
1664
01:21:54,605 --> 01:21:55,998
I've tried really hard
to avoid all of that...
1665
01:21:55,998 --> 01:21:57,216
He moved to Tribeca.
1666
01:21:57,216 --> 01:21:58,217
Wow.
1667
01:21:59,305 --> 01:22:01,264
Yeah. He has a dog.
1668
01:22:01,264 --> 01:22:02,918
- A dog?
- Mm-hmm.
1669
01:22:02,918 --> 01:22:05,659
A French Bulldog named Jasper.
1670
01:22:05,659 --> 01:22:07,487
He never really struck me
as a Frenchie type,
1671
01:22:07,487 --> 01:22:09,315
but okay. [chuckles]
1672
01:22:09,315 --> 01:22:10,577
It's his girlfriend's.
1673
01:22:15,191 --> 01:22:16,192
Oh.
1674
01:22:17,323 --> 01:22:18,411
[Ryan softly] Yeah.
1675
01:22:19,891 --> 01:22:21,980
I... I don't need to hear this.
1676
01:22:23,199 --> 01:22:24,852
- Are you okay?
- Mm-hmm.
1677
01:22:26,811 --> 01:22:28,987
How long have they been
going out?
1678
01:22:28,987 --> 01:22:31,859
I don't know.
Like, four months, I think.
1679
01:22:32,643 --> 01:22:33,557
Wow.
1680
01:22:33,557 --> 01:22:36,908
Yeah. She's a paralegal.
1681
01:22:37,953 --> 01:22:39,128
I don't even know what that is.
1682
01:22:39,128 --> 01:22:40,868
Is that, like, a good thing?
1683
01:22:42,131 --> 01:22:44,046
[voice breaking] Yeah. Wow.
1684
01:22:44,046 --> 01:22:46,178
- You just keep saying, "Wow."
- Yeah.
1685
01:22:46,178 --> 01:22:47,614
It's just a lot to take in.
1686
01:22:49,399 --> 01:22:50,878
Um...
1687
01:22:50,878 --> 01:22:53,446
I'm really happy for him. I am.
1688
01:22:53,446 --> 01:22:55,057
He really deserves to be happy.
1689
01:22:55,927 --> 01:22:57,450
I...
1690
01:22:57,450 --> 01:22:59,496
- I shouldn't have told you.
- No, no, no. It's fine.
1691
01:22:59,496 --> 01:23:01,585
But you're upset.
1692
01:23:01,585 --> 01:23:03,630
We went through
so much together.
1693
01:23:05,806 --> 01:23:08,940
I really want good things
to happen to him.
1694
01:23:09,810 --> 01:23:11,160
I'm really sorry
1695
01:23:11,160 --> 01:23:12,422
- I made you upset.
- [Allison] It's okay.
1696
01:23:12,422 --> 01:23:13,597
- I'm gonna go to the bathroom.
- I really
1697
01:23:13,597 --> 01:23:14,990
meant for this to be friendly.
1698
01:23:14,990 --> 01:23:16,992
Yeah. I'll see you in a second.
1699
01:23:16,992 --> 01:23:19,646
[breathing heavily]
1700
01:23:22,084 --> 01:23:23,172
[door slams]
1701
01:23:27,785 --> 01:23:30,309
[brooding music playing]
1702
01:23:30,309 --> 01:23:32,181
[crying softly]
1703
01:23:39,666 --> 01:23:40,667
[phone camera clicking]
1704
01:23:42,104 --> 01:23:43,670
[sobbing]
1705
01:23:52,114 --> 01:23:54,116
[continues sobbing]
1706
01:23:59,991 --> 01:24:00,992
[sniffles]
1707
01:24:08,173 --> 01:24:09,653
Hey.
1708
01:24:09,653 --> 01:24:11,133
Is something wrong?
1709
01:24:11,133 --> 01:24:13,483
I, um... I forgot
I have a job interview.
1710
01:24:13,483 --> 01:24:16,181
So, I'm gonna go. [sniffles]
1711
01:24:16,181 --> 01:24:17,487
- You sick?
- [sniffles]
1712
01:24:18,096 --> 01:24:19,097
[voice breaks] Yeah.
1713
01:24:19,097 --> 01:24:21,447
- Withdrawal?
- I'm trying.
1714
01:24:21,447 --> 01:24:23,319
All right. Look, don't stop.
1715
01:24:24,233 --> 01:24:25,234
- Okay?
- Okay.
1716
01:24:26,844 --> 01:24:27,801
Don't use.
1717
01:24:29,542 --> 01:24:30,717
Okay.
1718
01:24:30,717 --> 01:24:32,110
Don't stay home tonight.
Do something.
1719
01:24:32,110 --> 01:24:34,069
- Okay. Okay.
- All right? Okay.
1720
01:24:35,287 --> 01:24:36,158
You need a hug?
1721
01:24:38,073 --> 01:24:39,074
[voice breaking]
Um, if I hug you,
1722
01:24:39,074 --> 01:24:40,858
I'm gonna sob, so no.
1723
01:24:40,858 --> 01:24:42,381
Well, I can handle that.
1724
01:24:42,381 --> 01:24:44,427
No, I shouldn't. Not in front
of Ryan. [sniffles]
1725
01:24:44,427 --> 01:24:45,950
Okay.
1726
01:24:45,950 --> 01:24:47,821
Well, I'm hugging you
with my eyes.
1727
01:24:48,257 --> 01:24:49,214
Thank you.
1728
01:24:50,476 --> 01:24:51,869
- Be careful.
- Okay.
1729
01:24:56,047 --> 01:24:58,789
[Allison] I have to go.
So, I'll see you another time.
1730
01:24:59,137 --> 01:24:59,964
Bye.
1731
01:25:02,445 --> 01:25:03,576
[whispers] Fuck me.
1732
01:25:04,011 --> 01:25:04,969
Hey.
1733
01:25:05,361 --> 01:25:06,449
Let's go.
1734
01:25:06,449 --> 01:25:07,972
This asshole
charged me six buck
1735
01:25:07,972 --> 01:25:09,016
for a cup of coffee. Come on.
1736
01:25:11,236 --> 01:25:13,978
Okay.
1737
01:25:13,978 --> 01:25:17,155
["A Love Song Seven Ways"
playing]
♪ It starts so early now ♪
1738
01:25:17,155 --> 01:25:20,898
♪ The sun has gone
to Birkenau ♪
1739
01:25:20,898 --> 01:25:24,510
♪ As shadows creep
across your brow ♪
1740
01:25:24,510 --> 01:25:26,773
♪ I love you just the same ♪
1741
01:25:28,297 --> 01:25:29,559
[breathing heavily] Fuck!
1742
01:25:29,559 --> 01:25:31,648
♪ These freakish holidays ♪
1743
01:25:31,648 --> 01:25:35,565
♪ That make us act
like renegades ♪
1744
01:25:35,565 --> 01:25:39,177
♪ A blood bath
at the Ice Capades ♪
1745
01:25:39,177 --> 01:25:41,440
♪ Just makes me love you ♪
1746
01:25:41,440 --> 01:25:47,272
♪ More than I should ever
have been allowed ♪
1747
01:25:47,272 --> 01:25:50,493
♪ In a world of candy guns ♪
1748
01:25:50,493 --> 01:25:56,020
♪ Sweet as demons
in the candy apple sun ♪
1749
01:25:56,020 --> 01:26:02,113
♪ Think it quiet but then
don't sing it loud ♪
1750
01:26:02,113 --> 01:26:05,247
♪ Through a world
of number ones ♪
1751
01:26:05,247 --> 01:26:08,032
♪ Pointed skyward at the... ♪
1752
01:26:08,032 --> 01:26:09,164
Look at me!
1753
01:26:09,164 --> 01:26:10,208
[glass shattering]
1754
01:26:11,775 --> 01:26:13,037
[plays chord]
1755
01:26:13,037 --> 01:26:15,518
♪ ...here like Buffalo ♪
1756
01:26:15,518 --> 01:26:18,912
♪ Now it feels like Bamako ♪
1757
01:26:18,912 --> 01:26:22,089
♪ I love you seven ways ♪
1758
01:26:23,569 --> 01:26:26,224
♪ You wear those baby tees ♪
1759
01:26:26,920 --> 01:26:28,270
[knocking on door]
1760
01:26:28,270 --> 01:26:29,967
[Diane] Allie!
1761
01:26:29,967 --> 01:26:32,491
- [knocking continues]
- [in sing-song voice] Allie!
1762
01:26:34,014 --> 01:26:35,059
Allie?
1763
01:26:35,059 --> 01:26:36,843
Did you job hunt today?
1764
01:26:40,978 --> 01:26:42,371
Please leave me alone.
1765
01:26:43,110 --> 01:26:45,461
I was looking on Etsy.
1766
01:26:45,461 --> 01:26:47,550
And I was thinking
it would be so cute
1767
01:26:47,550 --> 01:26:49,378
if we found, like,
a craft that we like.
1768
01:26:49,378 --> 01:26:51,597
And maybe we could
make a little money.
What do you think?
1769
01:26:52,990 --> 01:26:54,644
[groans]
1770
01:26:54,644 --> 01:26:56,080
[cell phone chimes
and vibrates]
1771
01:27:08,310 --> 01:27:09,702
[Diane] I was thinking
it'd be so cute
1772
01:27:09,702 --> 01:27:11,574
if it was like something fun
that we could sell.
1773
01:27:11,574 --> 01:27:15,491
Like little bibs for babies
that catch their food,
1774
01:27:15,491 --> 01:27:18,102
or salad dressing.
1775
01:27:18,102 --> 01:27:20,409
Or you know, just...
1776
01:27:20,409 --> 01:27:22,062
[gasps]
1777
01:27:22,062 --> 01:27:23,325
And you know what?
1778
01:27:23,325 --> 01:27:25,196
We could be on Shark Tank!
1779
01:27:25,196 --> 01:27:27,067
Can you imagine, Allie?
1780
01:27:27,067 --> 01:27:28,286
And I know you're like,
1781
01:27:28,286 --> 01:27:30,593
"Oh, shut up, Mom!
You're drunk again."
1782
01:27:30,593 --> 01:27:31,724
But listen...
1783
01:27:42,431 --> 01:27:44,433
[Diane] Ooh, I just thought
of the best idea!
1784
01:27:44,433 --> 01:27:47,436
We could do, um, papier-mache!
1785
01:27:48,263 --> 01:27:49,829
Papier-mache!
1786
01:27:49,829 --> 01:27:51,527
So it would be like,
1787
01:27:51,527 --> 01:27:53,311
do a little dance,
a little song.
1788
01:27:53,311 --> 01:27:55,444
"Hey, Sharks! You know how
everybody likes papier-mache."
1789
01:27:55,444 --> 01:27:58,882
I would be like,
"Hey, Sharks! Hey, Sharks!"
1790
01:27:58,882 --> 01:28:01,363
Hey, Sharks! Oh... Sharks!"
1791
01:28:01,363 --> 01:28:03,800
Wait, that's too hard.
We'll be like,
1792
01:28:03,800 --> 01:28:07,586
"I'm Diane.
This is my associate, Allison.
1793
01:28:07,586 --> 01:28:12,722
"And this is our... whatever!"
You know...
1794
01:28:13,897 --> 01:28:15,725
[softly] You weak piece
of fucking shit.
1795
01:28:15,725 --> 01:28:17,770
You couldn't make it go
two days.
1796
01:28:19,032 --> 01:28:20,512
I fucking hate you.
1797
01:28:21,339 --> 01:28:24,777
I hate you so much.
1798
01:28:24,777 --> 01:28:27,563
Allie, do you remember
when you were in fourth grade,
1799
01:28:27,563 --> 01:28:30,043
you made
that giant mitochondria?
1800
01:28:30,043 --> 01:28:35,005
That's something that
would sell, I promise you.
1801
01:28:35,005 --> 01:28:37,616
We could be like,
"Hey, Sharks!"
1802
01:28:37,616 --> 01:28:40,140
We got them for you!
Papier-mache!"
1803
01:28:40,140 --> 01:28:43,796
You know, like all the...
1804
01:28:43,796 --> 01:28:46,625
[Diane's voice becomes muffled
and indistinct]
1805
01:28:51,195 --> 01:28:53,937
I knew you would like
that idea! I knew it!
1806
01:28:54,720 --> 01:28:56,722
[breathing heavily]
1807
01:28:57,810 --> 01:28:59,508
[pills rattling]
1808
01:29:06,341 --> 01:29:07,646
[bottle cap opening]
1809
01:29:12,825 --> 01:29:15,350
[shuddering]
1810
01:29:25,838 --> 01:29:27,884
[breathing heavily]
1811
01:29:33,846 --> 01:29:35,326
[gasps]
1812
01:29:37,110 --> 01:29:38,938
- [panting]
- [faucet running]
1813
01:29:55,041 --> 01:29:56,565
[sniffles]
1814
01:29:57,435 --> 01:29:59,394
[continues panting]
1815
01:30:07,706 --> 01:30:09,752
[train horn toots]
1816
01:30:21,416 --> 01:30:22,417
Yes!
1817
01:30:22,417 --> 01:30:23,548
[laughs]
1818
01:30:24,419 --> 01:30:25,942
You're on the wrong side.
1819
01:30:26,725 --> 01:30:28,597
What? No, I'm not.
1820
01:30:31,730 --> 01:30:33,297
Oh.
1821
01:30:33,297 --> 01:30:34,820
Well, good thing you came!
1822
01:30:34,820 --> 01:30:35,995
Oh, my God!
1823
01:30:36,518 --> 01:30:37,867
Get over here.
1824
01:30:37,867 --> 01:30:39,434
Whoo! Party!
1825
01:30:39,434 --> 01:30:41,218
[train whooshes by]
1826
01:30:48,443 --> 01:30:49,487
[knocking on door]
1827
01:30:58,191 --> 01:30:59,932
- Hello, Diane!
- Oh, hey!
1828
01:30:59,932 --> 01:31:01,978
I don't know
1829
01:31:01,978 --> 01:31:04,284
how much Allison has told you.
1830
01:31:05,547 --> 01:31:07,505
But we've been going
to the same program.
1831
01:31:07,505 --> 01:31:09,594
Oh, yeah, she said.
She told me, yeah.
1832
01:31:10,508 --> 01:31:11,770
My granddaughter, Ryan,
1833
01:31:11,770 --> 01:31:14,773
has taken an interest
in Allison and,
1834
01:31:14,773 --> 01:31:16,471
well, now I can't find her.
1835
01:31:16,471 --> 01:31:19,386
So I just thought I'd drop by
and see if she might be here.
1836
01:31:20,649 --> 01:31:22,128
I tried texting them,
1837
01:31:22,128 --> 01:31:25,480
but, you know,
they all go green.
1838
01:31:25,480 --> 01:31:26,481
Do you know what that means?
1839
01:31:26,481 --> 01:31:27,743
I have no idea.
1840
01:31:27,743 --> 01:31:29,962
I hate when that happens,
when they go...
1841
01:31:29,962 --> 01:31:31,398
It's all green
1842
01:31:31,398 --> 01:31:32,965
and you don't know
if it's sent. It's so weird.
1843
01:31:32,965 --> 01:31:34,750
- [Daniel] Right. Right. Right.
- Drives me crazy.
1844
01:31:34,750 --> 01:31:36,491
You'll have to let me know
if you figure that out.
1845
01:31:36,491 --> 01:31:38,493
[both chuckle]
1846
01:31:38,493 --> 01:31:40,146
I'm not tech-y.
1847
01:31:40,146 --> 01:31:43,585
But I actually tonight was
trying to find Allison myself.
1848
01:31:43,585 --> 01:31:45,674
But do you really think
they're together tonight?
1849
01:31:47,502 --> 01:31:49,373
Both missing
at the same time. It...
1850
01:31:50,592 --> 01:31:52,202
seems a little curious.
1851
01:31:52,202 --> 01:31:54,509
[sighs] Seems like
no matter how old they get,
1852
01:31:54,509 --> 01:31:56,815
- you never stop worrying.
- Yeah.
1853
01:31:56,815 --> 01:31:58,251
But they always seem
to turn up.
1854
01:31:59,731 --> 01:32:00,950
Not always.
1855
01:32:02,821 --> 01:32:04,301
Yeah.
1856
01:32:04,301 --> 01:32:07,086
Well, can you let me know
if you find them?
1857
01:32:07,086 --> 01:32:08,610
- I will.
- Great.
1858
01:32:10,612 --> 01:32:11,526
Thank you.
1859
01:32:12,396 --> 01:32:13,832
What's that?
1860
01:32:13,832 --> 01:32:15,007
Oh, I was just... I...
1861
01:32:15,007 --> 01:32:17,183
I was just saying
thank you so much
1862
01:32:17,183 --> 01:32:19,490
for being so kind to Allison.
1863
01:32:19,490 --> 01:32:22,798
She said you've always been
so warm to her and you know,
1864
01:32:22,798 --> 01:32:26,149
I... just wanted to say thanks,
'cause, you know,
1865
01:32:26,149 --> 01:32:29,848
like, some people
wouldn't be like that, so...
1866
01:32:29,848 --> 01:32:33,591
Well, we're all just trying
to move on, I suppose.
1867
01:32:33,591 --> 01:32:34,897
Yeah.
1868
01:32:34,897 --> 01:32:36,028
I don't think
Allie and I are doing
1869
01:32:36,028 --> 01:32:37,813
a very good job of that, Daniel.
1870
01:32:39,205 --> 01:32:40,555
You know what they say.
1871
01:32:40,555 --> 01:32:42,339
[Diane] What?
1872
01:32:42,339 --> 01:32:45,081
"Comparison
is the thief of joy."
1873
01:32:45,081 --> 01:32:47,431
Oh. I didn't know
they said that.
1874
01:32:48,867 --> 01:32:49,912
Well...
1875
01:32:51,087 --> 01:32:52,392
somebody did.
1876
01:32:52,392 --> 01:32:54,351
[laughs] Yeah.
1877
01:32:55,831 --> 01:32:57,441
Well, I best be going then.
1878
01:32:57,441 --> 01:32:58,877
Oh, yeah, of course.
1879
01:32:58,877 --> 01:33:00,270
- [Daniel] Night.
- Good night.
1880
01:33:06,798 --> 01:33:08,931
[downtempo music playing]
1881
01:33:14,458 --> 01:33:16,852
[singing "Stardust"]
♪ Stare into space ♪
1882
01:33:18,375 --> 01:33:20,116
♪ Out in the blue ♪
1883
01:33:20,116 --> 01:33:21,552
Oh, my God, there he is!
1884
01:33:21,552 --> 01:33:23,293
Look at him! Isn't he so hot?
1885
01:33:25,034 --> 01:33:26,862
Is that a face tattoo?
1886
01:33:26,862 --> 01:33:28,994
- Yeah!
- Oh, my God!
1887
01:33:29,952 --> 01:33:32,215
[sighs] I love this song!
1888
01:33:32,215 --> 01:33:33,651
Quinn sent it to me
in a playlist.
1889
01:33:33,651 --> 01:33:36,088
He, like, knows so much
about music.
1890
01:33:38,134 --> 01:33:39,222
Thank you.
1891
01:33:40,353 --> 01:33:41,616
For getting me to come.
1892
01:33:42,486 --> 01:33:43,574
Yeah.
1893
01:33:44,749 --> 01:33:48,057
[singer]
♪ You're the only thing ♪
1894
01:33:48,057 --> 01:33:49,580
That's the guitarist, Thomas.
1895
01:33:49,580 --> 01:33:52,496
He's staring right at you!
1896
01:33:52,496 --> 01:33:54,846
[Allison] Oh, stop.
No, I'm okay. I'm fine.
1897
01:33:54,846 --> 01:33:56,152
I know, you can do
so much better.
1898
01:33:56,152 --> 01:33:57,849
- [Allison] What? No.
- But he is fucking hot.
1899
01:33:57,849 --> 01:33:59,808
[both laugh]
1900
01:33:59,808 --> 01:34:03,899
Uh... Okay, I, um...
I gotta go get someone in.
1901
01:34:03,899 --> 01:34:04,856
But I'll be right back.
1902
01:34:04,856 --> 01:34:06,205
- Should I come with you?
- No.
1903
01:34:06,205 --> 01:34:07,903
- Are you sure?
- No, I'll be right back. Yeah.
1904
01:34:07,903 --> 01:34:10,035
[singer]
♪ Take a photo ♪
1905
01:34:11,558 --> 01:34:13,648
♪ Make it real ♪
1906
01:34:15,693 --> 01:34:17,652
♪ You're the stardust ♪
1907
01:34:23,658 --> 01:34:27,009
♪ Stardust ♪
1908
01:34:27,009 --> 01:34:30,142
♪ Lighting the fields ♪
1909
01:34:31,883 --> 01:34:34,277
♪ Caught in a state ♪
1910
01:34:35,757 --> 01:34:38,324
♪ Watching it fall ♪
1911
01:34:39,456 --> 01:34:42,024
♪ Aquarius bloom ♪
1912
01:34:43,460 --> 01:34:45,941
♪ Just bought a car ♪
1913
01:34:51,947 --> 01:34:53,470
Surprise!
1914
01:34:55,341 --> 01:34:56,691
Nathan?
1915
01:34:57,822 --> 01:34:59,302
- Hi!
- [Allison] Hi!
1916
01:35:00,520 --> 01:35:01,826
Ryan?
1917
01:35:01,826 --> 01:35:03,567
- What?
- Hi!
1918
01:35:04,742 --> 01:35:06,744
Uh, sorry.
1919
01:35:06,744 --> 01:35:09,921
Allie, uh,
this is my girlfriend, Joelle.
1920
01:35:11,009 --> 01:35:13,098
[voice cracking]
Hi. I'm sorry. Um...
1921
01:35:13,838 --> 01:35:14,926
Nice to meet you.
1922
01:35:14,926 --> 01:35:16,493
I've heard so much about you.
1923
01:35:17,363 --> 01:35:18,408
Oh.
1924
01:35:19,670 --> 01:35:20,671
Okay.
1925
01:35:20,671 --> 01:35:22,107
I think we're the victims
1926
01:35:22,107 --> 01:35:24,588
of a teenage girl's
good intentions.
1927
01:35:24,588 --> 01:35:26,329
- [Allison] What?
- I said...
1928
01:35:26,329 --> 01:35:28,853
I said I think
she meant well. Ryan.
1929
01:35:31,464 --> 01:35:33,292
[voice breaking]
I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go.
1930
01:35:33,292 --> 01:35:34,424
- [Nathan] Are you good?
- I'm fine.
1931
01:35:34,424 --> 01:35:35,730
I'm fine. I'm gonna go.
1932
01:35:35,730 --> 01:35:36,861
Allie!
1933
01:35:40,473 --> 01:35:41,997
Ryan.
1934
01:35:41,997 --> 01:35:43,912
What the fuck
did you just do that for?
1935
01:35:45,130 --> 01:35:47,219
No offense, but you weren't
supposed to come.
1936
01:35:47,219 --> 01:35:49,352
I know being a paralegal
is a good job,
1937
01:35:49,352 --> 01:35:50,919
but he's supposed
to be with Allie.
1938
01:35:50,919 --> 01:35:53,356
- I'm sorry.
- [Nathan] Ryan?
1939
01:35:53,356 --> 01:35:54,966
What the fuck did you just do?
1940
01:35:55,880 --> 01:35:57,403
I'm fixing it.
1941
01:35:57,403 --> 01:35:59,057
For Mom.
1942
01:35:59,057 --> 01:36:01,451
Go find her
and then I'm taking you home.
1943
01:36:02,626 --> 01:36:03,583
[Ryan scoffs]
1944
01:36:05,063 --> 01:36:06,456
I am so sorry.
1945
01:36:07,109 --> 01:36:08,937
Serious... This...
1946
01:36:08,937 --> 01:36:10,329
- It's fine. It's okay.
- Yeah?
1947
01:36:10,329 --> 01:36:11,591
- Yeah. Yeah.
- You good?
1948
01:36:11,591 --> 01:36:12,941
I'm fine. I need a drink.
1949
01:36:12,941 --> 01:36:14,116
- But I'm fine.
- Yes.
1950
01:36:14,116 --> 01:36:15,378
Oh, fuck!
1951
01:36:20,209 --> 01:36:21,471
[singer] You guys
have been great,
1952
01:36:21,471 --> 01:36:22,646
- thank you so much!
- [cheers and applause]
1953
01:36:22,646 --> 01:36:24,039
Allie!
1954
01:36:24,039 --> 01:36:26,432
Why the fuck
did you just do that?
1955
01:36:26,432 --> 01:36:28,478
I thought it was gonna
make you happy.
1956
01:36:28,478 --> 01:36:31,524
You thought
that would make me happy?
1957
01:36:31,524 --> 01:36:33,265
- [Ryan] Yeah!
- Are you insane?
1958
01:36:33,265 --> 01:36:35,441
Hi! Can I please get, um...
Hey, I'm sorry.
1959
01:36:35,441 --> 01:36:38,140
Could I just get a glass
of tequila, please?
1960
01:36:38,140 --> 01:36:39,445
Fuck, I can't breathe.
1961
01:36:39,445 --> 01:36:40,751
- Ryan, I can't fucking breathe!
- Calm down.
1962
01:36:40,751 --> 01:36:42,579
Calm down, okay? I'm sorry.
1963
01:36:42,579 --> 01:36:44,711
You fucking did that
on purpose!
1964
01:36:44,711 --> 01:36:46,017
You did that to hurt me, right?
1965
01:36:46,017 --> 01:36:47,845
Is that what you did?
Yeah, you did.
1966
01:36:47,845 --> 01:36:49,325
- Just admit it. Yes, you did!
- No, I didn't!
1967
01:36:49,325 --> 01:36:50,892
- You did that
on fucking purpose!
- No, I didn't!
1968
01:36:50,892 --> 01:36:53,851
You killed, baby! You killed!
1969
01:36:53,851 --> 01:36:56,288
- That was incredible, man!
- [Ryan] Hi! Hi!
1970
01:36:56,288 --> 01:36:58,551
I'm Quinn's friend, Ryan.
1971
01:36:58,551 --> 01:37:00,423
You guys sounded so good!
1972
01:37:00,423 --> 01:37:02,251
You're gonna be so famous!
1973
01:37:02,251 --> 01:37:04,949
I know. I really have to savor
my anonymity.
1974
01:37:04,949 --> 01:37:08,692
Hey, we're gonna go to this
party over in Williamsburg.
1975
01:37:08,692 --> 01:37:10,215
You guys wanna come?
1976
01:37:11,826 --> 01:37:13,610
[sighs] Fuck, yeah, whatever.
Let's go!
1977
01:37:13,610 --> 01:37:14,785
I need to get outta here.
1978
01:37:15,568 --> 01:37:17,440
[whooping]
1979
01:37:21,052 --> 01:37:22,837
Do you have the time?
1980
01:37:22,837 --> 01:37:24,708
- [cell phone chiming]
- Yeah.
1981
01:37:28,320 --> 01:37:30,453
Hey, Danny. Everything okay?
1982
01:37:30,453 --> 01:37:34,196
I can't find Ryan.
I've tried everything.
1983
01:37:34,196 --> 01:37:38,156
Anyway, my mind
can't help but wonder if...
1984
01:37:38,156 --> 01:37:40,419
Well, if you've seen Allison
or not.
1985
01:37:40,419 --> 01:37:43,683
Uh, no, I haven't, but I can
text her if you want.
1986
01:37:43,683 --> 01:37:45,076
Well, I've tried texting
both of them,
1987
01:37:45,076 --> 01:37:46,469
but neither one is answering.
1988
01:37:46,469 --> 01:37:47,687
What's wrong?
1989
01:37:47,687 --> 01:37:49,124
Daniel can't find
his granddaughter.
1990
01:37:49,124 --> 01:37:51,517
Um, well, if he pays for
the phone, he can just log
1991
01:37:51,517 --> 01:37:53,128
into the account,
and use Find My Phone.
1992
01:37:53,128 --> 01:37:55,565
Yeah. Daniel, do you know
what Find My Phone is?
1993
01:37:55,565 --> 01:37:57,045
No, what the hell is that?
1994
01:37:57,045 --> 01:37:58,873
[hip-hop music playing
on speaker]
1995
01:37:58,873 --> 01:38:01,136
[Ryan] This is amazing!
1996
01:38:01,919 --> 01:38:05,705
Whoa!
1997
01:38:05,705 --> 01:38:07,229
[indistinct chatter]
1998
01:38:20,764 --> 01:38:21,939
[cell phone chiming]
1999
01:38:28,119 --> 01:38:29,120
Fuck!
2000
01:38:30,600 --> 01:38:34,125
Allie, this is Jarvis. He has
the stuff you asked for.
2001
01:38:34,125 --> 01:38:35,387
Hey!
2002
01:38:35,387 --> 01:38:37,128
I don't have any thirties,
just dope.
2003
01:38:37,128 --> 01:38:40,131
Uh, yeah, okay.
Yeah, whatever you have.
2004
01:38:41,959 --> 01:38:43,656
Can you spot me?
2005
01:38:43,656 --> 01:38:45,745
- I'll pay you back, I promise.
- Uh, okay, all right.
2006
01:38:52,578 --> 01:38:53,579
Thanks.
2007
01:38:59,324 --> 01:39:00,412
[snorts]
2008
01:39:01,674 --> 01:39:03,241
It's coming. Look like!
2009
01:39:06,592 --> 01:39:07,550
Yeah, here it is.
2010
01:39:07,550 --> 01:39:08,725
Okay, what does it say?
2011
01:39:12,250 --> 01:39:14,426
[muffled music playing]
2012
01:39:14,426 --> 01:39:16,689
[Ryan grunts]
2013
01:39:16,689 --> 01:39:19,388
- [cell phone ringing]
- The whole room is spinning.
2014
01:39:21,346 --> 01:39:22,869
Oh, that's my phone.
2015
01:39:24,132 --> 01:39:25,394
Don't worry about it.
2016
01:39:27,265 --> 01:39:29,964
Can we just stop for a second?
2017
01:39:29,964 --> 01:39:31,356
Where is my phone?
2018
01:39:31,356 --> 01:39:33,445
[cell phone continues ringing]
2019
01:39:33,445 --> 01:39:35,056
I think I'm gonna throw up.
2020
01:39:38,015 --> 01:39:39,277
What the fuck!
2021
01:39:40,626 --> 01:39:42,889
She's in the fucking city!
2022
01:39:42,889 --> 01:39:45,109
She's in fucking Williamsburg!
2023
01:39:45,109 --> 01:39:47,198
Okay, Daniel, wait.
I'm gonna come pick you up.
2024
01:39:47,198 --> 01:39:49,157
I don't want you to do
something you're gonna regret.
2025
01:39:49,157 --> 01:39:50,854
I'm gonna kill
that motherfucker.
2026
01:39:50,854 --> 01:39:52,682
Yeah, that's exactly what I'm
worried about. I'm on my way.
2027
01:40:06,391 --> 01:40:08,959
- [Allison grunts]
- Okay. Easy does it.
2028
01:40:08,959 --> 01:40:10,961
- You're wasted.
- No, I'm not.
2029
01:40:10,961 --> 01:40:13,398
[hip-hop music playing
on speaker]
2030
01:40:13,398 --> 01:40:14,486
Ryan?
2031
01:40:16,358 --> 01:40:19,013
[breathing heavily]
2032
01:40:39,163 --> 01:40:40,382
Ryan?
2033
01:40:44,603 --> 01:40:46,344
- Ryan, are you in there?
- [knocking on door]
2034
01:40:46,344 --> 01:40:48,694
[Quinn] She's fine.
Go the fuck away!
2035
01:40:48,694 --> 01:40:49,869
[Allison] Ryan?
2036
01:40:49,869 --> 01:40:52,046
[techno music playing
on speaker]
2037
01:40:57,225 --> 01:40:58,269
[knocking on door]
2038
01:40:58,269 --> 01:40:59,357
[Allison] Ryan?
2039
01:41:00,837 --> 01:41:03,057
Can you just
open the door, please?
2040
01:41:05,363 --> 01:41:06,364
Ryan.
2041
01:41:06,364 --> 01:41:07,583
[Quinn] Go away!
2042
01:41:07,583 --> 01:41:09,802
[Daniel] Allison? Where's Ryan?
2043
01:41:09,802 --> 01:41:11,282
What're you doing here?
2044
01:41:11,282 --> 01:41:13,545
Where the fuck is Ryan?
2045
01:41:13,545 --> 01:41:15,852
She's in here. I'm trying to...
She won't answer.
2046
01:41:15,852 --> 01:41:16,940
- [knocking on door]
- Ryan!
2047
01:41:17,897 --> 01:41:18,942
[Daniel] Ryan?
2048
01:41:20,378 --> 01:41:22,076
It's your grandpa,
open the door.
2049
01:41:23,294 --> 01:41:24,774
Open the door, baby.
2050
01:41:24,774 --> 01:41:26,080
[Quinn] Fuck off!
2051
01:41:27,081 --> 01:41:28,212
[kicks door]
2052
01:41:28,212 --> 01:41:30,258
- What the fuck!
- [Allison] Ryan!
2053
01:41:30,258 --> 01:41:32,912
[Daniel] You again!
Get the fuck up!
2054
01:41:32,912 --> 01:41:34,088
- Danny, no, no, no.
- Oh, my God!
2055
01:41:34,088 --> 01:41:35,654
- Don't do that!
- Nothing happened.
2056
01:41:35,654 --> 01:41:38,222
Tell me why I shouldn't
kill you, motherfucker?
2057
01:41:38,222 --> 01:41:39,658
We were just making out.
2058
01:41:39,658 --> 01:41:40,877
You hurt my baby.
2059
01:41:43,532 --> 01:41:45,229
- Now, I'm gonna hurt you.
- [gun cocks]
2060
01:41:45,229 --> 01:41:46,665
- No, no, no, no, no.
- [Simone] Danny!
2061
01:41:47,623 --> 01:41:48,537
Dad!
2062
01:41:49,059 --> 01:41:50,930
No!
2063
01:41:50,930 --> 01:41:53,455
The hell you're doing here?
This is family business.
2064
01:41:53,455 --> 01:41:55,109
Don't do this.
2065
01:41:55,109 --> 01:41:57,111
Go on back
to your new life, Nate.
2066
01:41:57,111 --> 01:41:58,764
[Quinn] Put the gun down, please.
2067
01:41:58,764 --> 01:42:00,114
[sobbing] Please, please!
2068
01:42:00,114 --> 01:42:01,506
He's not worth it.
2069
01:42:01,506 --> 01:42:03,769
I got nothing left to lose.
2070
01:42:03,769 --> 01:42:05,075
You got me!
2071
01:42:06,424 --> 01:42:07,512
You got Ryan!
2072
01:42:08,296 --> 01:42:09,688
We need you!
2073
01:42:09,688 --> 01:42:11,951
You do this, it's over!
2074
01:42:14,345 --> 01:42:15,955
We get no more time.
2075
01:42:15,955 --> 01:42:18,088
[Simone] Danny,
put the gun down.
2076
01:42:20,264 --> 01:42:21,265
Please.
2077
01:42:26,052 --> 01:42:27,141
[sighs]
2078
01:42:28,577 --> 01:42:29,578
[Quinn] Oh, my...
2079
01:42:31,188 --> 01:42:32,233
That's my niece.
2080
01:42:32,929 --> 01:42:34,365
She's 16 years old.
2081
01:42:34,713 --> 01:42:36,324
[groans]
2082
01:42:36,324 --> 01:42:37,716
[Simone] Oh, my God! All right,
we gotta get out of here.
2083
01:42:37,716 --> 01:42:38,848
Hey, Ryan, baby?
2084
01:42:38,848 --> 01:42:40,415
- Please get up.
- My fucking nose!
2085
01:42:40,415 --> 01:42:43,418
- [Daniel] Get over here!
- [Quinn] My fucking nose!
2086
01:42:43,418 --> 01:42:45,855
[techno music playing
on speaker]
2087
01:42:50,729 --> 01:42:51,730
[door creaks]
2088
01:42:53,123 --> 01:42:55,081
[Allison breathing heavily]
2089
01:42:56,648 --> 01:42:58,172
The fuck is the matter
with you?
2090
01:42:58,172 --> 01:42:59,608
I was trying to protect her!
2091
01:42:59,608 --> 01:43:01,000
- [Daniel] Protect her?
- Yeah!
2092
01:43:01,000 --> 01:43:03,264
I told you to stay away
from her!
2093
01:43:03,264 --> 01:43:04,526
Who the fuck are you
2094
01:43:04,526 --> 01:43:06,049
to be talking
about protecting somebody?
2095
01:43:06,049 --> 01:43:07,659
- You're a mess.
- Dad!
2096
01:43:07,659 --> 01:43:10,096
I was... I was trying to help.
2097
01:43:10,096 --> 01:43:11,620
I was... I was trying to...
2098
01:43:12,447 --> 01:43:13,883
I was trying to make it right.
2099
01:43:13,883 --> 01:43:15,276
Let me tell you something.
2100
01:43:15,972 --> 01:43:17,626
You will never ever
2101
01:43:17,626 --> 01:43:19,758
be able to fix the things
you've done to me.
2102
01:43:20,933 --> 01:43:22,021
You hear me?
2103
01:43:22,805 --> 01:43:24,459
I want my life back.
2104
01:43:24,459 --> 01:43:25,721
I want my child back.
2105
01:43:26,852 --> 01:43:29,464
My baby, my... Molly.
2106
01:43:30,813 --> 01:43:32,336
You took my baby away from me!
2107
01:43:32,336 --> 01:43:33,685
Dad! Enough.
2108
01:43:33,685 --> 01:43:34,991
Nah, it's okay.
2109
01:43:36,732 --> 01:43:37,733
Say it.
2110
01:43:39,169 --> 01:43:40,605
Shit, I wanted to hate you.
2111
01:43:41,998 --> 01:43:43,217
But I stopped myself.
2112
01:43:45,871 --> 01:43:49,135
And when you walked into
that meeting, I thought...
2113
01:43:50,136 --> 01:43:52,443
This is God testing me.
2114
01:43:52,443 --> 01:43:56,839
This is proof of a higher power
2115
01:43:56,839 --> 01:43:59,058
testing me in this church.
2116
01:44:00,756 --> 01:44:02,148
Trying to see
if he could break me.
2117
01:44:03,237 --> 01:44:04,368
But I'll show him.
2118
01:44:07,066 --> 01:44:08,242
I'm unbreakable.
2119
01:44:09,765 --> 01:44:11,593
I will offer my hand
2120
01:44:12,289 --> 01:44:13,899
to this sorry
2121
01:44:14,726 --> 01:44:18,643
little fucking pill-junkie.
2122
01:44:18,643 --> 01:44:21,820
All I asked you to do
was stay away from this child.
2123
01:44:23,300 --> 01:44:24,345
Now look at her.
2124
01:44:25,694 --> 01:44:26,956
She got no mother.
2125
01:44:29,132 --> 01:44:30,133
No father.
2126
01:44:32,222 --> 01:44:34,180
And how many years
can I have left?
2127
01:44:36,531 --> 01:44:38,881
What a fucking waste you are.
2128
01:44:39,229 --> 01:44:40,143
Dad!
2129
01:44:40,143 --> 01:44:43,189
What a fucking waste of a soul.
2130
01:44:45,279 --> 01:44:46,541
Of a chance.
2131
01:44:46,541 --> 01:44:48,891
Danny, enough.
You've said your piece.
2132
01:44:48,891 --> 01:44:50,806
This isn't
how it was supposed to be.
2133
01:44:52,851 --> 01:44:54,026
I'm a good person.
2134
01:44:55,985 --> 01:44:58,161
I never said
God has to be fair.
2135
01:44:58,944 --> 01:45:00,076
I just never thought
2136
01:45:01,686 --> 01:45:02,992
he could be this cruel.
2137
01:45:06,604 --> 01:45:07,910
Taxi!
2138
01:45:07,910 --> 01:45:09,346
[Simone] Hold on, Danny,
let me take you home.
2139
01:45:09,346 --> 01:45:10,434
[Daniel] No.
2140
01:45:10,434 --> 01:45:13,437
I'll go with him.
Hey! Hey, Ryan!
2141
01:45:13,437 --> 01:45:15,874
Come on, wake up.
We're taking you home.
2142
01:45:17,398 --> 01:45:18,529
[Ryan grunts]
2143
01:45:29,192 --> 01:45:31,281
You drank!
2144
01:45:31,281 --> 01:45:35,329
You turned your map app
back on at 17:36:22.
2145
01:45:36,634 --> 01:45:39,724
Impact was at 17:36:24.
2146
01:45:41,247 --> 01:45:45,208
Skid marks show you lost
30 feet before you swerved.
2147
01:45:46,383 --> 01:45:49,212
You didn't have time to stop
2148
01:45:49,212 --> 01:45:52,041
because you were looking at
your fucking phone, Allison.
2149
01:45:53,564 --> 01:45:55,087
Stop blaming Alvarez.
2150
01:45:56,524 --> 01:45:58,482
They're dead because of you.
2151
01:46:08,362 --> 01:46:09,537
[stifles sob]
2152
01:46:09,537 --> 01:46:10,712
[car door closes]
2153
01:46:11,582 --> 01:46:13,367
[sobbing softly]
2154
01:46:17,893 --> 01:46:19,895
All right. All right.
It's all right.
2155
01:46:19,895 --> 01:46:21,200
Come here. Come here.
2156
01:46:22,898 --> 01:46:25,074
It's all right. Okay.
2157
01:46:28,207 --> 01:46:29,644
[kid] No, that can't go
over there.
2158
01:46:29,644 --> 01:46:31,210
That can't...
2159
01:46:32,211 --> 01:46:34,300
That can't... That can't go...
2160
01:47:05,636 --> 01:47:08,247
[soft music playing]
2161
01:47:30,313 --> 01:47:31,575
Good morning.
2162
01:47:32,315 --> 01:47:33,490
Good morning.
2163
01:47:34,839 --> 01:47:36,406
I made a house.
2164
01:47:38,669 --> 01:47:40,018
Do you have a headache?
2165
01:47:42,543 --> 01:47:43,544
Yeah.
2166
01:47:49,506 --> 01:47:50,986
Hey.
2167
01:47:50,986 --> 01:47:53,031
Can I, uh, sell this, please?
2168
01:48:02,476 --> 01:48:03,564
I'll give you $12,500.
2169
01:48:05,000 --> 01:48:06,392
Yeah. Yeah, okay. Thank you.
2170
01:48:07,132 --> 01:48:08,351
It is a beauty.
2171
01:48:10,527 --> 01:48:12,137
[piano music playing]
2172
01:48:12,137 --> 01:48:15,576
[Allison singing
"I Hate Myself"]
♪ I woke up today ♪
2173
01:48:17,316 --> 01:48:20,319
♪ At least that much is true ♪
2174
01:48:24,149 --> 01:48:27,283
♪ I saw what people see ♪
2175
01:48:29,285 --> 01:48:33,245
♪ What a year this made of me ♪
2176
01:48:40,426 --> 01:48:44,605
♪ I tried a hundred times ♪
2177
01:48:44,605 --> 01:48:49,087
♪ But each time
I thought of you ♪
2178
01:48:50,741 --> 01:48:52,569
Thank you.
2179
01:48:52,569 --> 01:48:57,792
♪ I hate myself ♪
2180
01:48:57,792 --> 01:49:01,622
♪ I fuckin' hate myself ♪
2181
01:49:07,541 --> 01:49:08,585
[crowd cheering]
2182
01:49:08,585 --> 01:49:13,198
♪ And I ♪
2183
01:49:15,070 --> 01:49:18,900
♪ I want days of pain ♪
2184
01:49:21,598 --> 01:49:24,819
♪ Oh, to feel ♪
2185
01:49:24,819 --> 01:49:28,997
♪ The things I need ♪
2186
01:49:33,654 --> 01:49:36,134
♪ To pay off this shame ♪
2187
01:49:36,134 --> 01:49:40,051
♪ And I know
that makes me broken ♪
2188
01:49:40,051 --> 01:49:44,099
♪ I know that makes me weak ♪
2189
01:49:46,449 --> 01:49:50,671
♪ I guess I'll put
my armor back on now ♪
2190
01:49:52,237 --> 01:49:55,197
♪ I found a way ♪
2191
01:49:55,197 --> 01:49:58,026
♪ But I turned around ♪
2192
01:50:00,506 --> 01:50:03,205
♪ One step to start ♪
2193
01:50:03,205 --> 01:50:07,992
♪ But I'd rather fall down ♪
2194
01:50:10,908 --> 01:50:13,868
♪ Too much of a coward ♪
2195
01:50:13,868 --> 01:50:17,045
♪ To just say I'm wrong ♪
2196
01:50:17,045 --> 01:50:19,177
[Ryan] Grandpa, you are not
gonna believe this.
2197
01:50:19,177 --> 01:50:20,352
One of the girls on the team
2198
01:50:20,352 --> 01:50:21,832
invited me to a party
this weekend.
2199
01:50:22,180 --> 01:50:23,486
You?
2200
01:50:23,486 --> 01:50:24,879
- Yes, me!
- [laughs]
2201
01:50:28,926 --> 01:50:32,582
[Allison continues singing]
♪ Help me, please ♪
2202
01:50:34,192 --> 01:50:38,022
♪ Try to fix yourself ♪
2203
01:50:38,022 --> 01:50:40,808
♪ That's all they said to me ♪
2204
01:50:49,730 --> 01:50:52,776
♪ Try to fix myself ♪
2205
01:50:53,995 --> 01:50:57,346
♪ To know how hard
that would be ♪
2206
01:51:05,528 --> 01:51:07,573
[song ends]
2207
01:51:07,573 --> 01:51:08,487
Hi.
2208
01:51:10,707 --> 01:51:11,708
Hi.
2209
01:51:15,973 --> 01:51:17,496
Thank you so much for coming.
2210
01:51:18,628 --> 01:51:19,542
Sure.
2211
01:51:24,068 --> 01:51:25,679
- You look great.
- [both chuckle]
2212
01:51:26,592 --> 01:51:27,855
I nearly put makeup on,
2213
01:51:27,855 --> 01:51:29,987
and then I just laughed
at myself. [laughs]
2214
01:51:32,337 --> 01:51:33,382
Do you like my clips?
2215
01:51:34,122 --> 01:51:35,645
Wow, yeah.
2216
01:51:35,645 --> 01:51:37,081
I stole them from a pharmacy.
2217
01:51:37,821 --> 01:51:38,909
- [scoffs]
- Not recently.
2218
01:51:38,909 --> 01:51:41,085
- Like, a while back.
- [both laugh]
2219
01:51:45,481 --> 01:51:46,743
I don't know where to start.
2220
01:51:46,743 --> 01:51:47,744
That's okay.
2221
01:51:48,310 --> 01:51:49,920
Um, I'll start.
2222
01:51:51,792 --> 01:51:52,836
[smacks lips]
2223
01:51:53,532 --> 01:51:55,317
[breathes deeply]
2224
01:51:57,536 --> 01:51:59,234
Nate, I didn't have...
2225
01:52:01,410 --> 01:52:02,890
the faintest idea
2226
01:52:04,413 --> 01:52:06,371
how to handle my own grief.
2227
01:52:09,810 --> 01:52:12,377
I didn't even know
if I was allowed to grieve.
2228
01:52:12,377 --> 01:52:14,728
We were all flailing.
2229
01:52:14,728 --> 01:52:16,904
Yeah, but I abandoned you,
2230
01:52:18,035 --> 01:52:19,689
and that was so selfish.
2231
01:52:22,126 --> 01:52:24,433
I ran as fast as I could
away from you.
2232
01:52:25,608 --> 01:52:27,610
I still wanted you
to be my wife.
2233
01:52:29,090 --> 01:52:30,134
I know.
2234
01:52:35,052 --> 01:52:37,185
But the truth is, Nate, I...
2235
01:52:39,274 --> 01:52:40,884
I was so sure
2236
01:52:42,364 --> 01:52:43,234
I was gonna...
2237
01:52:47,499 --> 01:52:49,632
- try...
- I know.
2238
01:52:51,765 --> 01:52:53,114
And you know I tried.
2239
01:52:55,594 --> 01:52:57,379
I tried, but I couldn't.
2240
01:52:59,903 --> 01:53:01,775
'Cause I didn't wanna
hurt you again.
2241
01:53:01,775 --> 01:53:03,559
It wasn't your fault.
2242
01:53:03,559 --> 01:53:04,734
It was.
2243
01:53:06,475 --> 01:53:07,868
Your dad was right.
2244
01:53:09,478 --> 01:53:10,827
If I hadn't been looking
at my phone,
2245
01:53:10,827 --> 01:53:12,350
I could have stopped in time.
2246
01:53:16,659 --> 01:53:19,705
You deserve an apology that
never came, and I'm so sorry.
2247
01:53:24,362 --> 01:53:25,494
I'm really sorry.
2248
01:53:27,844 --> 01:53:29,019
[sighs]
2249
01:53:29,019 --> 01:53:30,107
[chuckles dryly]
2250
01:53:32,327 --> 01:53:34,242
I've been spending some time
with him lately.
2251
01:53:34,242 --> 01:53:35,286
Yeah.
2252
01:53:36,592 --> 01:53:39,116
- Oh, it's a work-in-progress.
- [chuckles]
2253
01:53:40,335 --> 01:53:41,336
Good.
2254
01:53:44,730 --> 01:53:46,297
He kept me alive, you know.
2255
01:53:50,345 --> 01:53:51,607
I know about your ear.
2256
01:53:57,569 --> 01:54:02,096
Hey... I need you
to be clear on one thing.
2257
01:54:04,881 --> 01:54:06,448
I loved you so much.
2258
01:54:10,191 --> 01:54:11,845
[tearfully] And along
with everything else,
2259
01:54:13,324 --> 01:54:14,804
I will forever grieve
2260
01:54:14,804 --> 01:54:17,067
for the life that we might
have had. [sniffles]
2261
01:54:19,940 --> 01:54:21,028
Me too.
2262
01:54:24,596 --> 01:54:26,816
- We were a good team.
- [both chuckle softly]
2263
01:54:28,209 --> 01:54:30,080
It would be nice
2264
01:54:30,080 --> 01:54:31,995
if we could one day
find some way
2265
01:54:31,995 --> 01:54:33,867
to be in each other's lives.
2266
01:54:34,824 --> 01:54:36,391
Maybe that's unrealistic,
2267
01:54:36,391 --> 01:54:37,609
- but...
- Maybe.
2268
01:54:38,741 --> 01:54:39,698
[softly] Yeah.
2269
01:54:41,352 --> 01:54:42,527
Maybe.
2270
01:54:53,712 --> 01:54:55,453
I think
we can all thank Elaine.
2271
01:54:55,453 --> 01:54:57,064
Thank you so much.
2272
01:54:57,064 --> 01:54:59,327
I really appreciated
getting to know you,
2273
01:54:59,327 --> 01:55:01,416
and talking to you.
2274
01:55:01,416 --> 01:55:04,114
Everybody, our deeply
inappropriate stories
2275
01:55:04,114 --> 01:55:05,507
- from yesterday...
- [all laughing]
2276
01:55:05,507 --> 01:55:08,684
...have been well in my head.
King's laughing.
2277
01:55:08,684 --> 01:55:11,078
Your stories are foul. [laughs]
2278
01:55:12,383 --> 01:55:13,994
Mama,
2279
01:55:13,994 --> 01:55:15,299
I'm so grateful for you.
2280
01:55:15,299 --> 01:55:17,432
Thank you for everything
you've done for me.
2281
01:55:17,432 --> 01:55:18,912
And I love you.
2282
01:55:20,478 --> 01:55:23,003
[all applauding]
2283
01:55:23,003 --> 01:55:25,353
[soft piano music playing]
2284
01:55:28,922 --> 01:55:31,925
The food was terrible.
Thank you.
2285
01:55:31,925 --> 01:55:33,883
[Allison singing
"The Best Part"]
♪ I can't shake you off, dear ♪
2286
01:55:33,883 --> 01:55:37,321
♪ It's something
I have tried to do ♪
2287
01:55:37,321 --> 01:55:41,499
♪ But I can't
shake you off, dear ♪
2288
01:55:41,499 --> 01:55:44,676
♪ Sit on trains
and think of you ♪
2289
01:55:44,676 --> 01:55:46,374
♪ But I...♪
2290
01:55:46,374 --> 01:55:50,944
♪ Oh, I can't tell ♪
2291
01:55:52,032 --> 01:55:58,212
♪ If it hurts or it helps ♪
2292
01:56:00,431 --> 01:56:06,263
♪ So breathe me in ♪
2293
01:56:07,308 --> 01:56:11,747
♪ One last time ♪
2294
01:56:15,055 --> 01:56:17,883
♪ And we play ♪
2295
01:56:17,883 --> 01:56:23,106
♪ Our rehearsed ♪
2296
01:56:23,106 --> 01:56:27,197
♪ Goodbyes ♪
2297
01:56:30,853 --> 01:56:34,683
♪ I can't shake you off, dear ♪
2298
01:56:34,683 --> 01:56:38,948
♪ It's something
I have tried to do ♪
2299
01:56:38,948 --> 01:56:43,561
♪ But I can't
shake you off, dear ♪
2300
01:56:43,561 --> 01:56:47,391
♪ I sit on trains
and think of you ♪
2301
01:56:48,436 --> 01:56:54,833
♪ But you are the best part ♪
2302
01:56:56,531 --> 01:57:01,797
♪ You ♪
2303
01:57:04,626 --> 01:57:05,888
Thank you.
2304
01:57:05,888 --> 01:57:09,413
[scattered applause]
2305
01:57:09,413 --> 01:57:12,938
Um, I recently recorded
my first EP,
2306
01:57:12,938 --> 01:57:14,375
and it's at the coat check
2307
01:57:14,375 --> 01:57:16,855
because I'm also
the coat check girl.
2308
01:57:16,855 --> 01:57:19,032
Uh, so come buy a CD,
2309
01:57:19,032 --> 01:57:20,555
or I won't give you
your coats back.
2310
01:57:20,555 --> 01:57:22,557
[people laughing]
2311
01:57:26,082 --> 01:57:27,518
[cell phone ringing]
2312
01:57:31,870 --> 01:57:33,655
Hi.
2313
01:57:33,655 --> 01:57:35,657
I know you're calling
about my one-year clean,
2314
01:57:35,657 --> 01:57:37,833
but I need to tell you
what I just did.
2315
01:57:40,575 --> 01:57:42,098
Yeah. No, I can talk.
2316
01:57:43,882 --> 01:57:44,796
Okay.
2317
01:57:54,893 --> 01:57:56,808
[somber music playing]
2318
01:57:57,983 --> 01:57:59,246
Hey, Dwayne.
2319
01:57:59,246 --> 01:58:00,769
Could you take these
to the kitchen for me?
2320
01:58:00,769 --> 01:58:02,423
Thank you so much.
2321
01:58:02,423 --> 01:58:05,165
[soft, indistinct chatter]
2322
01:58:05,165 --> 01:58:06,862
[Simone] She'll give it back.
Right, Ryan?
2323
01:58:06,862 --> 01:58:08,342
- That's nice.
- [Ryan] Thank you.
2324
01:58:08,342 --> 01:58:11,649
Hey. How's it going?
Ooh, wait, I have cupcakes.
2325
01:58:11,649 --> 01:58:13,999
- Need any help?
- No, no, no. I'm all good.
Thank you.
2326
01:58:13,999 --> 01:58:14,957
Actually, we broke up
2327
01:58:14,957 --> 01:58:16,176
- a few months ago.
- Yeah...
2328
01:58:16,176 --> 01:58:17,481
- [Allison] Hey, Mama.
- Yes?
2329
01:58:17,481 --> 01:58:20,180
Could you go pass these around
over there?
2330
01:58:20,180 --> 01:58:21,311
I think they would like some.
2331
01:58:21,311 --> 01:58:22,573
- Sure.
- Thank you.
2332
01:58:22,573 --> 01:58:24,749
- Ooh, they smell so good.
- They are good.
2333
01:58:45,814 --> 01:58:47,816
[somber music continues]
2334
01:59:01,917 --> 01:59:02,831
[switch clicks]
2335
01:59:38,736 --> 01:59:40,434
[Daniel] Dear Allison.
2336
01:59:40,434 --> 01:59:43,959
Down here in 1:87 scale,
2337
01:59:43,959 --> 01:59:45,526
the lovers always kiss,
2338
01:59:46,396 --> 01:59:49,094
the neighbors are always kind,
2339
01:59:49,094 --> 01:59:52,141
and the trains always
take you to the far-off places
2340
01:59:52,141 --> 01:59:54,404
you always swore you'd go.
2341
01:59:56,101 --> 01:59:58,234
In life, of course,
2342
01:59:58,234 --> 02:00:00,497
nothing is nearly
as neat and tidy.
2343
02:00:02,238 --> 02:00:05,372
Everything I own has been left
to Nathan and Ryan.
2344
02:00:06,373 --> 02:00:08,201
Nathan has agreed to move home
2345
02:00:08,201 --> 02:00:10,986
and be her guardian
until she's off to college.
2346
02:00:12,117 --> 02:00:13,249
He'll need help.
2347
02:00:14,250 --> 02:00:16,905
Please help him, Allie.
2348
02:00:16,905 --> 02:00:20,343
Molly always said Nathan was
the best version of himself
2349
02:00:20,343 --> 02:00:21,518
when he was with you.
2350
02:00:22,737 --> 02:00:24,391
Who knows,
2351
02:00:24,391 --> 02:00:28,960
maybe you can even get her
into Stanford. [chuckles]
2352
02:00:28,960 --> 02:00:30,919
When we first met
in that diner,
2353
02:00:31,789 --> 02:00:34,575
you asked what my tattoo meant.
2354
02:00:34,575 --> 02:00:37,534
- Amor fati is Latin.
- [typewriter clacking]
2355
02:00:37,534 --> 02:00:39,710
It means "to love one's fate."
2356
02:00:40,929 --> 02:00:44,193
Neither of us
chose this fate, Allie.
2357
02:00:44,193 --> 02:00:47,849
But perhaps we can find a way
to love it.
2358
02:00:47,849 --> 02:00:51,940
Fate has given me
one final year with my son.
2359
02:00:51,940 --> 02:00:55,073
He looks at me differently
these days.
2360
02:00:55,073 --> 02:00:58,163
Once in a while I even
catch him smiling at me
2361
02:00:58,163 --> 02:01:01,515
with a look that might
just even be love.
2362
02:01:02,864 --> 02:01:04,909
Amor fati, Allison.
2363
02:01:06,084 --> 02:01:07,434
Until we meet again,
2364
02:01:08,826 --> 02:01:09,827
Daniel.
2365
02:01:13,353 --> 02:01:14,354
[Ryan] Allie?
2366
02:01:14,963 --> 02:01:16,269
Yeah?
2367
02:01:16,269 --> 02:01:17,357
What are you doing?
2368
02:01:18,793 --> 02:01:19,881
Come on upstairs.
2369
02:01:19,881 --> 02:01:20,838
[Allison] Yeah, okay.
2370
02:01:29,325 --> 02:01:32,459
["Deep In Love" playing]
2371
02:01:36,463 --> 02:01:37,464
[switch clicks]
2372
02:01:46,473 --> 02:01:51,478
♪ Down in the valley
the first of May ♪
2373
02:01:52,653 --> 02:01:55,046
[door creaks]
2374
02:01:55,046 --> 02:02:00,661
♪ Gatherin' flowers
both fresh and gay ♪
2375
02:02:03,751 --> 02:02:10,714
♪ Gatherin' flowers
both red and blue ♪
2376
02:02:10,714 --> 02:02:12,847
♪ How little thought
of what... ♪
2377
02:02:12,847 --> 02:02:15,676
[Allison breathes deeply]
2378
02:02:15,676 --> 02:02:18,026
♪ ...what love could you do ♪
2379
02:02:19,462 --> 02:02:23,727
♪ Don't you ♪
2380
02:02:27,340 --> 02:02:31,518
♪ Break my heart ♪
2381
02:02:36,827 --> 02:02:40,353
♪ Don't you ♪
2382
02:02:44,661 --> 02:02:48,317
♪ Break my heart ♪
2383
02:02:55,716 --> 02:03:01,199
♪ I put my hand in
into the bush ♪
2384
02:03:04,681 --> 02:03:08,685
♪ Finding the sweetest
sweetest rose ♪
2385
02:03:13,037 --> 02:03:18,956
♪ I pricked my finger
deep to the line ♪
2386
02:03:20,088 --> 02:03:24,353
♪ And left the sweetest rose ♪
2387
02:03:24,353 --> 02:03:28,662
♪ Sweetest rose behind ♪
2388
02:03:28,662 --> 02:03:32,187
♪ Don't you ♪
2389
02:03:36,539 --> 02:03:40,282
♪ Break my heart ♪
2390
02:03:45,853 --> 02:03:49,770
♪ Don't you ♪
2391
02:03:53,687 --> 02:03:58,082
♪ Break my heart ♪
2392
02:04:37,382 --> 02:04:41,996
♪ Don't you ♪
2393
02:04:45,086 --> 02:04:49,003
♪ Break my heart ♪
2394
02:04:54,530 --> 02:04:59,448
♪ Don't you ♪
2395
02:05:02,582 --> 02:05:06,542
♪ Break my heart ♪
2396
02:05:13,288 --> 02:05:18,815
♪ Thousands and thousands
all on this Earth ♪
2397
02:05:18,815 --> 02:05:20,904
[song ends]
2398
02:05:20,904 --> 02:05:22,732
["On My Mind" playing]
2399
02:05:32,089 --> 02:05:35,615
♪ Honey you've been
on my mind ♪
2400
02:05:35,615 --> 02:05:39,096
♪ Like Christmas and birthdays
when I was five ♪
2401
02:05:39,096 --> 02:05:41,272
♪ Like the ticking clock
for racers ♪
2402
02:05:41,272 --> 02:05:43,405
♪ And those
in the prison line ♪
2403
02:05:43,405 --> 02:05:47,104
♪ Like Everest for Mallory and
how drinkers know their wine ♪
2404
02:05:47,104 --> 02:05:50,804
♪ And the birds and the bees
when you hit nine ♪
2405
02:05:50,804 --> 02:05:54,938
♪ And pearls for those girls
2406
02:05:54,938 --> 02:05:58,594
♪ Who always have their hair
in pretty curls ♪
2407
02:05:58,594 --> 02:06:07,821
♪ You're on my mind ♪
2408
02:06:07,821 --> 02:06:11,346
♪ Honey you've been
in my head ♪
2409
02:06:11,346 --> 02:06:15,306
♪ Like homework on Sunday when
I've been laughing instead ♪
2410
02:06:15,306 --> 02:06:19,180
♪ Like cigarettes for the cool
kids behind the garden shed ♪
2411
02:06:19,180 --> 02:06:23,837
♪ And love for the lovers
and the elephant by my bed ♪
2412
02:06:23,837 --> 02:06:27,884
♪ And pearls for those girls ♪
2413
02:06:27,884 --> 02:06:31,845
♪ Who always have their hair
in pretty curls ♪
2414
02:06:31,845 --> 02:06:35,936
♪ And football
for English boys ♪
2415
02:06:35,936 --> 02:06:39,679
♪ Who always have
the newest toys ♪
2416
02:06:39,679 --> 02:06:50,037
♪ You're on my mind ♪
2417
02:06:56,739 --> 02:07:03,485
♪ So don't you
go away too long ♪
2418
02:07:04,921 --> 02:07:18,456
♪ Oh don't you
go away too long ♪
2419
02:07:19,283 --> 02:07:23,461
♪ Oh don't you go ♪
2420
02:07:23,461 --> 02:07:27,422
♪ Away too long ♪
2421
02:07:27,422 --> 02:07:31,644
♪ You're on my mind ♪
2422
02:07:32,557 --> 02:07:37,562
♪ You're on my mind ♪
2423
02:07:37,562 --> 02:07:38,651
[song ends]